"Whatmakesitmoreremarkableisthattheladyisnotagamester，hasneverplayedbefore，andissaidtohavedeclaredthatsheshallneverplayagain。Itiscertainthat，withsuchaface，figure，andvoiceashers，sheneedneverseekforwealthatthegambling-table。MademoiselleKloskingisnowinnegotiationwithalltheprincipalcitiesoftheContinent。ButtheEnglishmanagers，weapprehend，willproveawkwardcompetitors。"
WereItoreproducethenineotherparagraphs，itwouldbeaverycurious，instructive，andtediousspecimenofliterature；and，whoknows?
Imightcorruptsomeimmaculatesoul，inspiresomeactororactress，singerorsongstress，withanitchforpublicself-laudation，afoiblefromwhichtheyareallatpresentsofree。Witnessthe_Era，_the_Hornet，_and_Figaro。_
InaKloskingspottedwhatsheconceivedtobeadefectinthesehistories。"Myfriend，"saidshemeekly，"thesumIwonwasunderfivethousandpounds。"
"Wasit?Yes，tobesure。But，yousee，theseareEnglishadvertisements。
NowEnglandissorichthatifyoukeepdowntoany_Continental_sum，yougiveafalseimpressioninEnglandoftheimportanceonthespot。"
"Andsowearetofalsifyfigures?Inthefirstoftheselegendsitwasdoublethetruth；and，asIread，itenlarges——oh，butitenlarges，"saidIna，withaGallicismweshallhavetoforgiveinaladywhospokefivelanguages。
"Madam，"saidAshmead，dryly，"youmustexpectyourcapitaltoincreaserapidly，solongasIconductit。"
Notbeingherselfswifttoshedjokes，Inadidnottakethemrapidly。Shestaredathim。Henevermovedamuscle。Shegaveaslightshrugofhergrandshoulders，andresignedthatattempttoreasonwiththecreature。
Shehadapillinstoreforhim，though。Shetoldhimthat，asshehadsacrificedthelongingsofherhearttothepoorofthetheater，sosheshouldsacrificeaportionofherill-gottengainstothepoorofthetown。
Hemadeahideouslywryfaceatthat，askedwhatpoor-rateswerefor，andassuredherthat"pauper"meant"drunkard。"
"ItisnotwrittensoinScripture，"saidIna；"andIneedtheirprayers，forIamveryunhappy。"
Inshort，AshmeadwasdrivenoutfromthepresencechamberwithathousandthalerstodistributeamongthepoorofHomburg；and，onceinthestreet，hisfacedidnotshinelikeanangelofmercy's，butwasverypinchedandmorose；hardlyrecognizable——poorJoe!
By-and-byhescratchedhishead。Nowitisunaccountable，butcertainheadsoftenyieldanideainreturnforthat。Joseph'sdid，andhiscountenancebrightened。
ThreedaysafterthisInawassurprisedbyanotefromtheburgomaster，sayingthatheandcertainofthetowncouncilwouldhavethehonorofcallingonheratnoon。
Whatmightthismean?
ShesenttoaskforMr。Ashmead；hewasnottobefound；hehadhiddenhimselftoocarefully。
Thedeputationcameandthankedherforhermunificentactofcharity。
Shelookedpuzzledatfirst，thenblushedtothetemples。"Munificentact，gentlemen!Alas!Ididbutdirectmyagenttodistributeasmallsumamongthedeservingpoor。Hehasdoneveryilltocourtyourattention。
Mylittlecontributionshouldhavebeenasprivateasitisinsignificant。"
"Nay，madam，"saidtheclerkofthecouncil，whowasarecognizedorator，"youragentdidwelltoconsultourworthyburgomaster，whoknowsthepersonsmostinneedandmostdeserving。Wedonotdoubtthatyoulovetodogoodinsecret。Nevertheless，wehavealsooursenseofduty，andwethinkitrightthatsobenevolentanactshouldbepublished，asanexampletoothers。Inthesameview，weclaimtocommentpubliclyonyourgoodness。"Thenhelookedtotheburgomaster，whotookhimup。
"Andwecommentthus:Madam，sincetheMiddleAgesthefreedomofthistownhasnotbeenpossessedbyanyfemale。Thereis，however，nolawforbiddingit，andtherefore，madam，thecivicauthorities，whomI
represent，doherebypresenttoyouthefreedomofthisburgh。"
Hethenhandedheranemblazonedvellumgivinghercitizenship，withthereasonswrittenplainlyingoldenletters。
InaKlosking，whohadremainedquitequietduringthespeeches，waitedamomentortwo，andthenreplied，withseemlygraceanddignity:
"Mr。Burgomasterandgentlemen，youhavepaidmeagreatandunexpectedcompliment，andIthankyouforit。Butonethingmakesmeuneasy:itisthatIhavedonesolittletodeservethis。Iconsolemyself，however，byreflectingthatIamstillyoung，andmayhaveopportunitiestoshowmyselfgrateful，andeventodeserve，inthefuture，thishonor，whichatpresentoverpaysme，andalmostoppressesme。Onthatunderstanding，gentlemen，bepleasedtobestow，andletmereceive，therarecomplimentyouhavepaidmebyadmittingmetocitizenshipinyourdelightfultown。"
Toherself:"I'llscoldhimwellforthis。"
Lowcourtesy；profoundbows；exitdeputationenchantedwithher；_manet_
Kloskingwiththefreedomofthecityinherhandandingratitudeinherheart；forheroneideawastogetholdofMr。JosephAshmeaddirectlyandreproachhimseverelyforallthis，whichshejustlyascribedtohismachinations。
ThecunningAshmeaddivinedherproject，andkeptpersistentlyoutofherway。Thatdidnotsuitherneither。Shewaslonely。Shegavethewaiterafriendlylinetobringhimtoher。
Now，mindyou，shewastoohonesttopretendshewasnotgoingtoscoldhim。Sothisiswhatshewrote:
"MYFRIEND——Haveyoudesertedme?Cometome，andberemonstrated。Whathaveyoutofear?Youknowsowellhowtodefendyourself。
INAKLOSKING。"
ArrivedinaveryfewminutesMr。Ashamed，jaunty，cheerful，anddefensive。
Ina，withacountenancefromwhichalldiscontentwasartfullyextracted，laidbeforehim，inthefriendliestwayyoucanimagine，anEnglishBible。Itwasherfather's，andshealwayscarrieditwithher。"Iwish，"
saidshe，insidiously，"toconsultyouonapassageortwoofthisbook。
Howdoyouunderstandthis:
"'Whenthoudoestthinealms，donotsendatrumpetbeforethee，asthehypocritesdo。'
"Andthis:
"'Whenthoudoestthinealms，letnotthyrighthandknowwhatthylefthanddoeth，thatthinealmsmaybeinsecret；andthyFather，whichseethinsecret，shallrewardtheeopenly。'"
Havingpointedoutthesesentenceswithherfinger，shelookedtohimforhisinterpretation。Joseph，thuserectedintoaScripturecommentator，lookedatthepassagesfirstnear，andthenafaroff，asifthetrueinterpretationdependedonperspective。Havingthusgainedalittletime，hesaid，"Well，Ithinkthemeaningisclearenough。Wearetohideourownlightunderabushel。Butitdon'tsayanagentistohidehisemployer's。'
"Beserious，sir。Thisisagreatauthority。"
"Oh，ofcourse，ofcourse。Still——ifyouwon'tbeoffended，ma'am——timesarechangedsincethen。Itwasaverysmallplace，wherenewsspreadofitself；andallthatcannotbewrittenfortheatricalagents，becausetherewasn'toneincreation。"
"Andsonowtheirlittlecustoms，latelyinvented，likethemselves，aretoprevailagainstGod'sim-mor-tallaw!"ItwassomethinghalfwaybetweenHandelandmellowedthunderthewayhergrandcontraltosuddenlyrolledoutthesethreewords。Josephwascunning。Heputonacrushedappearance，deceivedbywhichthefirmbutgentleKloskingbegantosoftenhertonedirectly。
"Ithasgivenmepain，"saidshe，sorrowfully。"AndIamafraidGodwillbeangrywithusbothforourostentation。"
"NotHe，"saidJoseph，consolingly。"Blessyourheart，Heisnothalfsoirritableastheparsonsfancy；theyconfoundHimwiththemselves。"
Inaignoredthissuggestionwithperfectdignityandflowedon:"AllI
stipulatenowisthatImaynotseethispitiableparadeinprint。"
"Thatispastprayingfor，then，"saidAshmead，resolutely。"Youmightaswelltrytostopthewavesascheckpublicity——inourday。Yourmunificencetothepoor——confoundthelazylot!——andthegratitudeofthosepompousprigs，thedeputation——thepresentation——youradmirablereply——"
"Youneverheardit，now——"
"Which，asyousay，Iwasnotsofortunateastohear，andsomustcontentmyselfwithdescribingit——allthisisflyingnorth，south，east，andwest。"
"Ohno，no，no!Youhavenot_advertised_it?"
"Notadvertisedit!Forwhatdoyoutakeme?WaittillyouseethebillI
amrunningupagainstyou。Madam，youmusttakepeopleastheyare。Don'ttrytoun-Ashmead_me；_itisimpossible。Catchupthatknifeandkillme。I'llnotresist；onthecontrary，I'llsitdownandprepareanobituarynoticefortheweeklies，andsayIdidit。BUTWHILEIBREATHEI
ADVERTISE。"
AndJosephwasdefiant；andtheKloskingshruggedhernobleshoulders，andsaid，"Youbestofcreatures，youareincurable。"
Tofollowthisincidenttoitsconclusion，notaweekafterthisscene，InaKloskingdetected，inanEnglishpaper，"ACHARITABLEACT。
"MademoiselleKlosking，thegreatcontralto，havingwonalargesumofmoneyattheKursaal，hasgivenathousandpoundstothepooroftheplace。Thecivicauthoritieshearingofthis，anddesiroustomarktheirsenseofsonobleadonation，havepresentedherwiththefreedomoftheburgh，writtenonvellumandgold。MademoiselleKloskingreceivedthecomplimentwithcharminggraceandcourtesy；buthermodestyissaidtohavebeenmuchdistressedatthepublicityherebygiventoanactshewishedtobeknownonlytothepersonsrelievedbyhercharity。"
Inacaughttheculpritandshowedhimthis。"Athousandpounds!"saidshe。"Areyounotashamed?Waseveraniggardlyactsoembellishedandexaggerated?Ifeelmyfaceveryred，sir。"
"Oh，I'llexplainthatinamoment，"saidJoseph，amicably。"Eachnationhasacoinitisalwaysquoting。Francecountsinfrancs，Germanyinthalers，Americaindollars，Englandinpounds。WhenathingcostsamillionfrancsinFrance，oramilliondollarsintheStates，thatisalwayscalledamillionpoundsintheEnglishjournals:otherwiseitwouldconveynodistinctideaatalltoanEnglishman。Turningthalersandfrancsintopounds——_that_isnot_exaggeration；_itisonly_translation。"_
Inagavehimsuchalook。Herepliedwithanunabashedsmile。
Sheshruggedhershouldersinsilencethistime，and，tothebestofmybelief，madenomoreseriousattemptstoun-AshmeadherAshmead。
Amonthhadnowpassed，andthatwasalittlemorethanhalfthedrearytimeshehadtowadethrough。Shebegantocountthedays，andthatmadeherpineallthemore。Timeislikeakettle。Beblindtohim，heflies；
watchhim，helags。Hersweettemperwasalittleaffected，andsheevenreproachedAshmeadforholdingheroutfalsehopesthathisadvertisementsofhergainswouldinduceSevernetocometoher，orevenwrite。"No，"saidshe；"theremustbesomegreaterattraction。KarlsaysthatMissVizard，whocalleduponme，wasabeauty，anddark。PerhapsshewasthelovelygirlIsawattheopera。Shehasneverbeentheresince:
andheisgonetoEnglandwithpeopleofthatname。"
"Well，butthatMissVizardcalledonyou。Shecan'tintendtostealhimfromyou。"
"Butshemaynotknow；awomanmayinjureanotherwithoutintending。Hemaydeceiveher；hehasbetrayedme。Herextraordinarybeautyterrifiesme。Itenchantedme；andhowmuchmoreaman?"
Josephsaidhethoughtthiswasallfancy；andasforhisadvertisements，itwastooearlyyettopronounceontheireffect。
Theverydayafterthisconversationhebouncedintoherroomingreatdudgeon。"There，madam!theadvertisements_have_producedaneffect；andnotapleasantone。Here'sadetectiveontous。HeisfeelinghiswaywithKarl。Iknewthemaninamoment；callshimselfPoikilusinprint，andSmithtotalkto；butheisAaronatthebottomofitall，andcanspeakseverallanguages。Confoundtheirimpudence!puttingadetectiveonto_us，_whenitistheythatarekeepingdark。"
"Whodoyouthinkhassenthim?"askedIna，intently。
"Thepartyinterested，Isuppose。"
"Interestedinwhat?"
"Why，inthemoneyyouwon；forhewasdrawingKarlaboutthat。"
"Then_he_senttheman!"AndInabegantopantandchangecolor。
"Well，nowyouputittome，Ithinkso。Cometolookatit，itiscertain。Whoelse_could_itbe?Hereisabraceofsweeps。Theywouldn'tbetheworseforagoodkicking。Yousaytheword，andSmithshallhaveone，atallevents。"
"Alas!myfriend，"saidIna，"foronceyouareslow。What!amessengercomesheredirectfrom_him；_andarewesodullwecanlearnnothingfromhimwhocomestoquestionus?Letmethink。"
Sheleanedherforeheadonherwhitehand，andherfaceseemedslowlytofillwithintellectualpower。
"Thatman，"saidsheatlast，"istheonlylinkbetweenhimandme。I
mustspeaktohim。"
Thenshethoughtagain。
"No，notyet。Hemustbedetainedinthehouse。Lettersmaycometohim，andtheirpostmarksmaygiveussomeclew。"
"I'llrecommendthehousetohim。"
"Oh，thatisnotnecessary。Hewilllodgehereofhisownaccord。Doesheknowyou?"
"Ithinknot。"
"Donotgivehimtheleastsuspicionthatyouknowheisadetective。"
"Allright，Iwon't。"
"Ifhesoundsyouaboutthemoney，saynobodyknowsmuchaboutit，exceptMademoiselleKlosking。Ifyoucangetthemattersofar，comeandtellme。Butbe_you_veryreserved，foryouarenotclear。"
Ashmeadreceivedtheseinstructionsmeekly，andwentintothe_salle'amanger_andordereddinner。Smithwasthere，andhadevidentlygotsomeinformationfromKarl，forheopenedaneasyconversationwithAshmead，anditendedintheirdiningtogether。
Smithplayedtheopen-handedcountrymantothelife——stoodchampagne。
Ashmeadchattered，andseemedquiteoffhisguard。Smithapproachedthesubjectcautiously。"Gamblehereasmuchasever?"
"Allday，someofthem。"
"Ladiesandall?"
"Why，theladiesaretheworst。"
"No；aretheynow?Ah，thatremindsme。Iheardtherewasaladyinthisveryhousewonapoto'money。"
"Itistrue。Iamheragent。"
"Isupposeshelostitallnextday?"
"Well，notall，forshegaveathousandpoundstothepoor。"
"Thedressmakerscollaredtherest?"
"Icannotsay。Ihavenothingtodoexceptwithhertheatricalbusiness。
Shewillmakemorebythatthansheevermadeatplay。"
"What，isshetip-top?"
"ThemostrisingsingerinEurope。"
"Ishouldliketoseeher。"
"Thatyoucaneasilydo。Shesingstonight。I'llpassyouin。"
"Youareagoodfellow。Haveabitofsupperwithmeafterward。Bottleoffizz。"
Thesetwomightbecomparedtoacoupleofspiders，eachtakingtheotherforafly。SmithwasenchantedwithIna'ssinging，orpretended。Ashmeadwasdelightedwithhim，orpretended。
"Introducemetoher，"saidSmith。
"Idarenotdothat。Youarenotprofessional，areyou?"
"No，butyoucansayIam，foralark。"
Ashmeadsaidheshouldliketo；butitwouldnotdo，unlesshewasverywary。
"Oh，I'mfly，"saidtheother。"Shewon'tgetanythingoutofme。I'vebeenbehindthescenesoftenenough。"
ThenAshmeadsaidhewouldgoandaskherifhemightpresentaLondonmanagertoher。
Hesoonbroughtbacktheanswer。"Sheistootiredto-night:butI
pressedher，andshesaysshewillbecharmedifyouwillbreakfastwithherto-morrowateleven。"Hedidnotsaythathewastobewithherathalf-pasttenforspecialinstructions。Theywereverysimple。"Myfriend，"saidshe，"Imeantotellthismansomethingwhichhewillthinkithisdutytotelegraphorwriteto_him_immediately。ItwasforthisI
wouldnothavethemantosupper，beingafterpost-time。Thismorningheshalleitherwriteortelegraph，andthen，ifyouareascleverinthisasyouareinsomethings，youwillwatchhim，andfindouttheaddresshesendsto。"
Ashmeadlistenedveryattentively，andfellintoabrownstudy。
"Madam，"saidheatlast，"thisisafirst-ratecombination。YoumakehimcommunicatewithEngland，andIwilldotherest。Ifhetelegraphs，I'llbeathisheels。Ifhegoestothepost，Iknowaway。Ifhepostsinthehouse，hemakesittooeasy。"
AtelevenAshmeadintroducedhisfriend"Sharpus，managerofDruryLaneTheater，"andwatchedthefencingmatchwithsomeanxiety，Inabeinglittleversedinguile。Butshehadtactandself-possession；andshewasnotanangel，afterall，butawomanwhosewitsweresharpenedbyloveandsuffering。
Sharpus，aliasSmith，playedhisassumedcharactertoperfection。HegavetheKloskingmanyincidentsofbusinessandprofessionalanecdotes，andwasexcellentcompany。TheKloskingwasgracious，andmore_bonneenfant_
thanAshmeadhadeverseenher。Itwasafinematchbetweenherandthedetective。Atlasthemadehisapproaches。
"AndIhearwearetocongratulateyouonsuccessat_rougeetnoir_aswellasopera。Isittruethatyoubrokethebank?"
"Perfectly，"wasthefrankreply。
"Andwonamillion?"
"Moreorless，"saidtheKlosking，withanopensmile。
"Ihopeitwasagoodlump，forourcountrymenleavehundredsofthousandshereeveryseason。"
"Itwasfourthousandninehundredpounds，sir。"
"Phew!Well，Iwishithadbeendouble。Youarenotsocloseasourfriendhere，madam。"
"No，sir；andshallItellyouwhy?"
"Ifyoulike，madam，"saidSmith，withassumedindifference。
"Mr。Ashmeadisamodelagent；heneverallowshimselftoseeanybody'sinterestsbutmine。Nowthetruthis，anotherpersonhasaninterestinmyfamouswinnings。Agentlemanhanded25poundstoMr。Ashmeadtoplaywith。Hedidnotdoso；butIcameinandjoined25poundsofmyowntothat25pounds，andwonanenormoussum。Ofcourse，ifthegentlemanchoosestobechivalrousandabandonhisclaim，hecan；butthatisnotthewayoftheworld，youknow。Ifeelsurehewillcometomeforhissharesomeday；andthesoonerthebetter，formoneyburnsthepocket。"
Sharpus，aliasSmith，saidthiswasreallyacuriousstory。"Nowsuppose，"saidhe，"somefinedayaletterwastocomeaskingyoutoremitthatgentlemanhishalf，whatshouldyoudo?"
"Ishoulddecline；itmightbean_escroc。_No。Mr。Ashmeadhereknowsthegentleman。Doyounot?"
"I'llsweartohimanywhere。"
"ThentoreceivehismoneyhemustfacetheeyeofAshmead。Ha!ha!"
Thedetectiveturnedtheconversation，andnevercamebacktothesubject；butshortlyhepleadedanengagement，andtookhisleave。
Ashmeadlingeredbehind，butInahurriedhimoff，withanemphaticcommandnottoleavethismanoutofhissightamoment。
Heviolatedthisorder，forinfiveminutesheranbacktotellher，inanagitatedwhisper，thatSmithwas，atthatmoment，writingaletterinthe_salle'amanger。_
"Oh，praydon'tcomehere!"criedIna，indespair。"Donotlosesightofhimforamoment。"
"Givemethatlettertopost，then，"saidAshmead，andsnatchedoneupInahaddirectedovernight。
Hewenttothehoteldoor，andlightedacigar；outcameSmithwithaletterinhisveryhand。Ashmeadpeeredwithallhiseyes；butSmithheldtheletterverticallyinhishandandtheaddressinward。Theletterwassealed。
Ashmeadwatchedhim，andsawhewasgoingtotheGeneralPost。Heknewashortercut，ran，andtookit，andlayinwait。AsSmithapproachedthebox，letterinhand，hebustledupinafurioushurry，andpostedhisownlettersoastostopSmith'shandattheveryaperturebeforehecouldinserthisletter。Hesaw，apologized，anddrewback。Smithlaughed，andsaid，"Allright，oldman。Thatistoyoursweetheart，oryouwouldn'tbeinsuchahurry。"
"No；itwastomygrandmother，"saidAshmead。
"Goon，"saidSmith，andpokedtheribsofJoseph。Theywenthomejocular；butthedetectivewasnosooneroutofthewaythanAshmeadstoleuptoInaKlosking，andputhisfingertohislips；forKarlwasclearingaway，andinnohurry。
Theysatontenter-hooksandthoughtheneverwouldgo。Hedidgoatlast，andthentheKloskingandAshmeadcametogetherliketwomagnets。
"Well?"
"Allright!Lettertopost。Sawaddressquiteplain——EdwardSeverne，Esq。"
"Yes。"
"VizardCourt。"
"Ah!"
"Taddington——Barfordshire——England。"
Ina，whowasstandingallonfire，nowsatdownandinterlacedherhands。
"Vizard!"saidshe，gloomily。
"Yes；VizardCourt，"saidAshmead，triumphantly；"thatmeansheisalargelandedproprietor，andyouwilleasilyfindhimifheisthereinamonth。"
"Hewillbethere，"saidIna。"Sheisverybeautiful。Sheisdark，too，andheloveschange。Oh，iftoallIhavesufferedheadds_that_——"
"Thenyouwillforgivehim_that，"_saidAshmead，shakinghishead。
"Never。Lookatme，JosephAshmead。"
Helookedatherwithsomeawe，forsheseemedtransformed，andherDanisheyegleamedstrangely。
"Youwhohaveseenmytormentsandmyfidelity，markwhatIsay:Ifheisfalsetomewithanotherwoman，Ishallkillhim——orelseIshallhatehim。"
Shetookherdeskandwrote，atAshmead'sdictation，"VizardCourt，Taddington，Barfordshire。"
CHAPTERXIX。
THEnextmorningVizardcarriedLordUxmoorawaytoamagistrates'
meeting，andlefttheroadcleartoSeverne；butZoegavehimnoopportunityuntiljustbeforeluncheon，andthensheputonherbonnetandcamedownstairs；butFannywaswithher。
Severne，whowasseatedpatientlyinhisbedroomwiththedoorajar，cameouttojointhem，feelingsureFannywouldopenlysidewithhim，orslipawayandgivehimhisopportunity。
But，astheyoungladiesstoodonthebroadflightofstepsatthehalldoor，anantiquefiguredrewnigh——anoldlady，theshapeofanegg，soshortandstoutwasshe。Onherheadsheworeablacksilkbonnetconstructedmanyyearsago，withadrolldesign，viz。，tokeepoffsun，rain，andwind；itwaslikeanironcoalscuttle，slightlyshortened；yethaveIseensomeveryprettyfacesveryprettilyframedinsuchabonnet。
Shehadanoldblacksilkgownthatonlyreachedtoherankle，andoveritascarletcloakofsuperfinecloth，fineasanycolonelorqueen'soutridereverwore，andlookingsplendid，thoughshehaduseditfortyyears，atoddtimes。Thisdamehadescapedthevillageill，rheumatics，andcouldtoddlealongwithoutastaffatagreat，andindeedafearful，pace；for，owingtoherbuild，sheyawedsofromsidetosideateverystepthat，tothemwhoknewhernot，acapsizeappearedinevitable。
"Mrs。Judge，Ideclare，"criedZoe。
"Ay，MissHannahJudgeitis。Yoursarvant，ma'am；"andshedroppedtwocourtesies，oneforeachlady。
Mrs。JudgewasHarrington'soldnurse。Zoeoftenpaidavisittohercottage，butshenevercametoVizardCourtexceptonHarrington'sbirthday，whentheservantsentertainedalltheoldpensionersandretainersatsupper。Hersuddenappearance，therefore，andingalacostume，astonishedZoe。Probablyherfacebetrayedthis，fortheoldladybegan，"Youwondertoseemehere，now，doan'tye?"
"Well，Mrs。Judge，"saidZoe，diplomatically，"nobodyhasabetterrighttocome。"
"Youbeverygood，miss。Idon'tdoubtmywelcomenohow。"
"But，"saidZoe，playfully，"youseldomdousthehonor；soI_am_alittlesurprised。WhatcanIdoforyou?"
"Youdoesenoughforme，miss，youandyoungsquire。Ibain'tcometoasknofavors。Iain'toneo'thatsort。I'lltellyewhyIbecome。'Tistowarnyoualluphere。"
"Thisisalarming，"saidZoetoFanny。
"Thatisasmaybe，"saidMrs。Judge；"forwarned，forearmed，theby-wordsayeth。Thereisayoung'omana-prowlingaboutthishereparishasdon'tbelongto_hus。"_
"La，"saidFanny，"mustn'twevisityourparishifwewerenotbornthere?"
"Don'tyoutakemeupbeforeIbedown，miss，"saidtheoldnurse，alittleseverely。"'Tain'tforthelikesofyouIspeak，whichyouarealady，andvisitstheCourtbypermissionofsquire；butwhatIobjectstois——hinterlopers。"Shepausedtoseetheeffectofsobigaword，andthenresumed，graciously，"Yousee，mostofourhillscomesfromthatthereHillstoke。Ifthere'sapoacher，orathief，heisHillstoke；theyharborsthegypsiesasravagethewholecountry，mostly；andnowtheyhaveletloosethishereyoung'omanontous。SheisaPOLLPRY:goesaboutthetowna-sarching:priesintotheirhousenandtheirvittels，andtheirverybeds。OldMarkshavegotamuck-heapathisdoorforhisgarden，yeknow。Well，miss，shesticksherparasoleintothishere，andturnsitabout，asifshewasagoingtospreadit:saysshe，'Imustknowthede-com-po-si-tionofthis'ere，asyoukeepsunderthenosesofyouryoungfolk。'Well，Iseedheragoingherrounds，andthefolkhadtoldmeherways；soIdidsetmedowntomyknittingandwaitforher，andwhenshecametomeIofferedheraseat；soshesatdown，andsaysshe'Thisistheonecleanhouseinthevillage，'saysshe:'youmighteatyourdinneroffthefloor，letalonethechairsandtables。''Youareverygood，miss，'saysI。Saysshe，'Iwonderwhetherupstairsisasniceasthis?''Well，'saysI，'themaskeepitdownstairskeepsithup；Idon'tdropcleanlinessonthestairs，youmaybesure。''Isupposenot，'saysshe，'butIshouldliketosee。'ThatwaswhatIwasa-waitingfor，youknow，soIsaidtoher，'Curiositydobreedcuriosity，'saysI。'AforeyousarchesthisherehousefromtoptobottomIshouldliketoseethewarrant。''Whatwarrant?'saysshe。'I'venowarrant。Don'ttakemeforanenemy，'saysshe。'I'myourbestfriend，'saysshe。'I'mthenewdoctor。'ItoldherIhadheardawhisperofthattoo；butwehadgotaparishdoctoralready，andonewasenough。'Notwhenhenevercomesanighyou，'saysshe，'andletsyougohalfwaytomeetyourdiseases。''I
don'tknowforthat，'saysI，andindeedIhaan'tanotionwhatshemeant，formypart；butsaysI，'Idon'twantnowomenfolktocomeherea-doctoringo'me，that'ssartin。'Soshesaid，'Butsupposeyouwereveryill，andthehe-doctorthreemilesoff，andfiftyotherstovisitaforeyou?''Thatisnoodds，'saysI；'Iwouldnotbedoctoredbyawoman。'Thenshesaystome，saysshe，'Nowyoulookmeintheface。''I
candothat，'saysI；'you，oranybodyelse。I'manhonestwoman，_I_
am；'soIupandlookedherinthefaceasboldasbrass。'Then，'saysshe，'amItounderstandthat，ifyouwastobeillto-morrow，youwouldratherdiethanbedoctoredbyawoman?'Shethoughttodaantme，yousee，soIsays，'Well，Idon'tknowasIoodn't。'Youdolaugh，miss。
Well，thatiswhatshedid。'Allright，'saysshe。'Makehasteanddie，mygoodsoul，'saysshe，'for，whileyoulive，you'llbeahobelisktoreform。'Soshewentoff，butImadetothedoor，andcalledafterherI
shoulddiewhenGodpleased，andIhadseenagoodmanyyoungfolklaidout，thatlookedasliketomakeoldbonesasevershedoes——chalk-faced——skinny——to-a-d!AndIcalledafterhershewasnolady。Nomoresheain't，tocomeintomyownhouseandcalladecentwoman'ahobelisk!'Oh!oh!WhichInever_was，_noteveninmygiddydays，butdidworkhardinmyyouth，andamrespectformyoldage。"
"Yes，nurse，yes；whodoubtsit?"
"Andnursedyoungsquire，and，Lordblessyourheart，awasapoorpunychildwhenItookhimtomybreast，andinsixmonthsthefinest，chubbiestboyinalltheparish；andhisdry-nurseforyearsarter，andalwaysathisheelsa-keepinghimoutofthestableandtheponds，andconsortingwiththevillageboys；andaproperresolutechildhewas，andhardtomanage:andmyownmanthatisgone，andmyson'that'snotsocleverassome，'*Ialwaysdonejusticebythemboth，andarteralltobecalledahobelisk——oh!oh!oh!"
*Paraphraseforthenounsubstantive"idiot。"ItisalsoaspecimenoftheGreekfigure"litotes。"
ThenbeholdthegentleZoewithherarmroundnurse'sneck，andherhandkerchieftonurse'seyes，murmuring，"There——there——don'tcry，nurse；
everybodyesteemsyou，andthatladydidnotmeantoaffrontyou；shedidnotsay'obelisk；'shesaid'obstacle。'Thatonlymeansthatyoustandinthewayofherimprovements；therewasnotmuchharminthat，youknow。
And，nurse，pleasegivethatladyherway，toobligeme；foritisbymybrother'sinvitationsheishere。"
"Yedoan'tsayso!What，doesheholdwithfemaleshe-doctoresses?"
"Hewishesto_try_one。Shehashisauthority。"
"Yedoan'tsayso!"
"IndeedIdo。"
"Con——sarnthewench!whycouldn'tshesaysso，'steado'hargefying?"
"Sheisastranger，andmeanswell；soshedidnotthinkitnecessary。
Youmusttakemywordforit。"
"La，miss，I'lltakeyour'nbeforehers，you_may_besure，"saidMrs。
Judge，withadecidedremnantofhostility。
Andnowaproverbialincidenthappened。MissRhodaGalecameinsight，andwalkedrapidlyintothegroup。
Aftergreetingtheladies，andignoringSeverne，whotookoffhishattoher，withdeeprespect，inthebackground，sheturnedtoMrs。Judge。
"Well，oldlady，"saidshecheerfully，"andhowdoyoudo?"
Mrs。Judgereplied，infawningaccents，"Thankyou，miss，Ibewellenoughtogetabout。Iwasa-telling'emaboutyou——and，tobesure，itisuncommongoodofaladylikeyoutotroublesomuchaboutpoorfolk。"
"Don'tmentionit；itismydutyandmyinclination。Yousee，mygoodwoman，itisnotsoeasytocurediseasesaspeoplethink；thereforeitisapartofmedicinetopreventthem:andtopreventthemyoumustremovethepredisposingcauses，andtofindoutallthosecausesyoumusthaveeyes，andusethem。"
"Youareright，miss，"saidLaJudge，obsequiously。"Preventionisbetternorcure，andtheysay'astitchintimesavesnine。'"
"Thatiscapitalgoodsense，Mrs。Judge；andpraytellthevillagersthat，andmakethemasfullof'thewisdomofnations'asyouseemtobe，andtheirhousesasclean——ifyoucan。"
"I'lldomybest，miss，"saidMrs。Judge，obsequiously；"itistheleastwecanalldoforayoungladylikeyouthatleavesthepompsandvanities，andgiveshermindtobetteringthecondishingofpoorfolk。"
Havingoncetakenthiscueandentereduponaveinofflattery，shewouldhavebeenextremelyvoluble——forvillagescanviewithcitiesinadulationaswellasindetraction——butshewasinterruptedbyafootmanannouncingluncheon。
ZoehandedMrs。Judgeovertothemanwitharequestthathewouldbekindtoher，andhavehertodinewiththeservants。
Yellowplushsawthegentlefolksaway，andthen，partinghislegs，andputtinghisthumbsintohiswaistcoatpockets，deliveredhimselfthus:
"Well，oldgirl，amItogiveyoumyharmroundtothekitchen，ordoyouknowthewaybyyourself?"
"Youngchap，"saidMrs。Judge，andturnedaglitteringeye，"Ididknowthewayaforeyouwasborn，andIshouldknowitalloneifsobeyouwastobehung，orsenttoBotanyBay——tolarnmanners。"
Havingdeliveredthisshot，sherolledawayinthedirectionofRoastBeef。
ThelittlepartyhadhardlysettledatthetablewhentheywerejoinedbyVizardandUxmoor:bothgentlemenwelcomedMissGalemoreheartilythantheladieshaddone，andbeforeluncheonendedVizardaskedherifherreportwasready。Shesaiditwas。
"Haveyougotitwithyou?"
"Yes。"
"Thenpleasehandittome。"
"Oh!itisinmyhead。Idon'twritemuchdown；thatweakensthememory。
Ifyouwouldgivemehalfanhourafterluncheon——"Shehesitatedalittle。
Zoejealouseda_te'te-'a-te'te，_andparrieditskillfully。"Oh，"saidshe，"butweareallmuchinterested:arenotyou，LordUxmoor?"
"IndeedIam，"saidUxmoor。
"SoamI，"saidFanny，whodidn'tcareabutton。
"Yes，but，"saidRhoda，"truthsarenotalwaysagreeable，andtherearesomethatIdon'tlike——"Shehesitatedagain，andthistimeactuallyblushedalittle。
TheacuteMr。Severne，whohadbeenwatchingherslyly，cametoherassistance。
"Lookhere，oldfellow，"saidhetoVizard，"don'tyouseethatMissGalehasdiscoveredsomespotsinyourparadise?but，outofdelicacy，doesnotwanttopublishthem，buttoconfidethemtoyourownear。Thenyoucanmendthemornot。"
MissGaleturnedhereyesfullonSeverne。"Youareverykeenatreadingpeople，sir，"saidshe，dryly。
"Ofcourseheis，"saidVizard。"Hehasgivengreatattentiontoyoursex。Well，ifthatisall，MissGale，prayspeakoutandgratifytheircuriosity。YouandIshallneverquarreloverthetruth。"
"I'mnotsosureofthat，"saidMissGale。"However，IsupposeImustriskit。Ineverdogetmyownway；that'safact。"
Afterthislittleebullitionofspleen，sheopenedherbudget。"Firstofall，Ifindthatthesevillagesallbelongtooneperson；sodoesthesoil。Nobodycanbuildcottagesonabettermodel，normakeanyotherimprovement。Youareanabsolutemonarch。ThisisapieceofRussia，notEngland。Theyareallserfs，andyouaretheczar。"
"Itistrue，"saidVizard，"anditsoundshorrid，butitworksbenignly。
Everysnobwhocangrindthepoordoesgrindthem；butagentlemannever，andhehindersothers。Now，forinstance，anEnglishfarmerisgenerallyatyrant；butmypowerlimitshistyranny。Hemaydischargehislaborer，buthecan'tdrivehimoutofthevillage，norrobhimofparishrelief，forpoorHodgeis_my_tenant，notasnob's。NobodycanbuildabeershopinIslip。Thatistrue。Butiftheycould，theywouldsellbadbeer，givecreditintheardorofcompetition，poisonthevillagers，anddemoralizethem。Believeme，republicaninstitutionsarebeautifulonpaper；buttheywouldnotworkwellinBarfordshirevillages。However，youprofesstogobyexperienceineverything。Thereareopenvillageswithinfivemiles。I'llgiveyoualist。Visitthem。Youwillfindthatlibertycanbethefatheroftyranny。Pettytradesmenhavecomeinandbuiltcottages，andgroundthepoordownwithrentsunknowninIslip；farmershavebuiltcottages，andturnedtheirlaborersintoslaves。Drunkenness，dissipation，poverty，disaffection，andmisery——thatiswhatyouwillfindintheopenvillages。Now，inIslipyouhaveanomnipotentsquire，andthatisanabominationintheory，amediaevalmonster，ablotonmoderncivilization；butpracticallythepoormonsterisasoftenerofpoverty，anincarnatebufferbetweenthepoorandtyranny，thepoorandmisery。"
"I'llinspecttheopenvillages，andsuspendmyopiniontillthen，"saidMissGale，heartily；"but，inthemeantime，youmustadmitthatwherethereisgreatpowerthereisgreatresponsibility。"
"Oh，ofcourse。"
"Well，then，yourlittleoutlyingprovinceofHillstokeisfullofrheumaticadultsandputty-facedchildren。Thetwophenomenaarisefromonecause——thewater。Nolimeinit，andtoomanyreptiles。Itwasthechildrengavemetheclew。Isuspectedthecherrystonesatfirst:butwhenIcametolookintoit，Ifoundtheyeatjustasmanycherrystonesinthevalley，andareasrosyasapples；but，then，thereiswellwaterinthevalleys。SoIputthisandthattogether，andIexaminedthewatertheydrinkatHillstoke。Sir，itisfullofanimalcula。Someofthesecannotwithstandtheheatofthehumanstomach；butotherscan，forI
triedtheminmudartificiallyheated。[AgigglefromFannyDover。]
Thankstoyourmicroscope，Ihavemadesketchesofseveralamphibiawholiveinthoseboys'stomachs，andirritatetheirmembranes，andsharetheirscantynourishment，besidesotherinjuries。"Thereuponsheproducedsomedrawings。
Theywerehandedround，andstruckterroringentlebosoms。"Oh，gracious!"criedFanny，"oneoughttodrinknothingbutchampagne。"