'Yes，sir。'
'Youknewit？'
'Yes。'
'Youknewit!andyouactuallysatthereandpermittedthemtogoonwithoutawordofreproof!'
'Ididn'tthinktheyweredoinganyharm。'
'Anyharm!Why，lookthere!Justlookatthatcarpet，andsee-
wasthereeveranythinglikeitinaChristianhousebefore？Nowonderyourroomisnotfitforapigsty-nowonderyourpupilsareworsethanalitterofpigs!-nowonder-oh!Ideclare，itputsmequitepastmypatience'andhedeparted，shuttingthedoorafterhimwithabangthatmadethechildrenlaugh。
'Itputsmequitepastmypatiencetoo!'mutteredI，gettingup；
and，seizingthepoker，Idasheditrepeatedlyintothecinders，andstirredthemupwithunwontedenergy；thuseasingmyirritationunderpretenceofmendingthefire。
Afterthis，Mr。Bloomfieldwascontinuallylookingintoseeiftheschoolroomwasinorder；and，asthechildrenwerecontinuallylitteringthefloorwithfragmentsoftoys，sticks，stones，stubble，leaves，andotherrubbish，whichIcouldnotpreventtheirbringing，orobligethemtogatherup，andwhichtheservantsrefusedto'cleanafterthem，'Ihadtospendaconsiderableportionofmyvaluableleisuremomentsonmykneesuponthefloor，inpainsfullyreducingthingstoorder。OnceItoldthemthattheyshouldnottastetheirsuppertilltheyhadpickedupeverythingfromthecarpet；Fannymighthaveherswhenshehadtakenupacertainquantity，MaryAnnwhenshehadgatheredtwiceasmany，andTomwastoclearawaytherest。Wonderfultostate，thegirlsdidtheirpart；butTomwasinsuchafurythatheflewuponthetable，scatteredthebreadandmilkaboutthefloor，struckhissisters，kickedthecoalsoutofthecoal-pan，attemptedtooverthrowthetableandchairs，andseemedinclinedtomakeaDouglas-larderofthewholecontentsoftheroom:butIseizeduponhim，and，sendingMaryAnntocallhermamma，heldhim，inspiteofkicks，blows，yells，andexecrations，tillMrs。Bloomfieldmadeherappearance。
'Whatisthematterwithmyboy？'saidshe。
Andwhenthematterwasexplainedtoher，allshedidwastosendforthenursery-maidtoputtheroominorder，andbringMasterBloomfieldhissupper。
'Therenow，'criedTom，triumphantly，lookingupfromhisviandswithhismouthalmosttoofullforspeech。'Therenow，MissGrey!
youseeI'vegotmysupperinspiteofyou:andIhaven'tpickedupasinglething!'
Theonlypersoninthehousewhohadanyrealsympathyformewasthenurse；forshehadsufferedlikeafflictions，thoughinasmallerdegree；asshehadnotthetaskofteaching，norwasshesoresponsiblefortheconductofhercharge。
'Oh，MissGrey!'shewouldsay，'youhavesometroublewiththemchilder!'
'Ihave，indeed，Betty；andIdaresayyouknowwhatitis。'
'Ay，Idoso!ButIdon'tvexmyselfo'er'emasyoudo。
Andthen，yousee，Ihit'emaslapsometimes:andthemlittle'uns-
Igives'emagoodwhippingnowandthen:there'snothingelsewilldofor'em，aswhattheysay。Howsoever，I'velostmyplaceforit。'
'Haveyou，Betty？Iheardyouweregoingtoleave。'
'Eh，blessyou，yes!Missisgavemewarningathreewiksin'。
ShetoldmeaforeChristmashowitmudbe，ifIhit'emagain；butI
couldn'tholdmyhandoff'ematnothing。IknownothowYOUdo，forMissMaryAnn'sworsebythehalfnorhersisters!'
chapter05
CHAPTERV-THEUNCLE
BESIDEStheoldlady，therewasanotherrelativeofthefamily，whosevisitswereagreatannoyancetome-thiswas'UncleRobson，'Mrs。Bloomfield'sbrother；atall，self-sufficientfellow，withdarkhairandsallowcomplexionlikehissister，anosethatseemedtodisdaintheearth，andlittlegreyeyes，frequentlyhalf-
closed，withamixtureofrealstupidityandaffectedcontemptofallsurroundingobjects。Hewasathick-set，strongly-builtman，buthehadfoundsomemeansofcompressinghiswaistintoaremarkablysmallcompass；andthat，togetherwiththeunnaturalstillnessofhisform，showedthatthelofty-minded，manlyMr。
Robson，thescornerofthefemalesex，wasnotabovethefopperyofstays。Heseldomdeignedtonoticeme；and，whenhedid，itwaswithacertainsuperciliousinsolenceoftoneandmannerthatconvincedmehewasnogentleman:thoughitwasintendedtohaveacontraryeffect。ButitwasnotforthatIdislikedhiscoming，somuchasfortheharmhedidthechildren-encouragingalltheirevilpropensities，andundoinginafewminutesthelittlegoodithadtakenmemonthsoflabourtoachieve。
FannyandlittleHarrietheseldomcondescendedtonotice；butMaryAnnwassomethingofafavourite。HewascontinuallyencouraginghertendencytoaffectationwhichIhaddonemyutmosttocrush，talkingaboutherprettyface，andfillingherheadwithallmannerofconceitednotionsconcerningherpersonalappearancewhichI
hadinstructedhertoregardasdustinthebalancecomparedwiththecultivationofhermindandmanners；andIneversawachildsosusceptibleofflatteryasshewas。Whateverwaswrong，ineitherherorherbrother，hewouldencouragebylaughingat，ifnotbyactuallypraising:peoplelittleknowtheinjurytheydotochildrenbylaughingattheirfaults，andmakingapleasantjestofwhattheirtruefriendshaveendeavouredtoteachthemtoholdingraveabhorrence。
Thoughnotapositivedrunkard，Mr。Robsonhabituallyswallowedgreatquantitiesofwine，andtookwithrelishanoccasionalglassofbrandyandwater。Hetaughthisnephewtoimitatehiminthistotheutmostofhisability，andtobelievethatthemorewineandspiritshecouldtake，andthebetterhelikedthem，themorehemanifestedhisbold，andmanlyspirit，androsesuperiortohissisters。Mr。Bloomfieldhadnotmuchtosayagainstit，forhisfavouritebeveragewasginandwater；ofwhichhetookaconsiderableportioneveryday，bydintofconstantsipping-andtothatIchieflyattributedhisdingycomplexionandwaspishtemper。
Mr。RobsonlikewiseencouragedTom'spropensitytopersecutethelowercreation，bothbypreceptandexample。Ashefrequentlycametocourseorshootoverhisbrother-in-law'sgrounds，hewouldbringhisfavouritedogswithhim；andhetreatedthemsobrutallythat，poorasIwas，Iwouldhavegivenasovereignanydaytoseeoneofthembitehim，providedtheanimalcouldhavedoneitwithimpunity。Sometimes，wheninaverycomplacentmood，hewouldgoa-birds'-nestingwiththechildren，athingthatirritatedandannoyedmeexceedingly；as，byfrequentandperseveringattempts，I
flatteredmyselfIhadpartlyshownthemtheevilofthispastime，andhoped，intime，tobringthemtosomegeneralsenseofjusticeandhumanity；buttenminutes'birds'-nestingwithuncleRobson，orevenalaughfromhimatsomerelationoftheirformerbarbarities，wassufficientatoncetodestroytheeffectofmywholeelaboratecourseofreasoningandpersuasion。Happily，however，duringthatspring，theynever，butonce，gotanythingbutemptynests，oreggs-beingtooimpatienttoleavethemtillthebirdswerehatched；
thatonce，Tom，whohadbeenwithhisuncleintotheneighbouringplantation，camerunninginhighgleeintothegarden，withabroodoflittlecallownestlingsinhishands。MaryAnnandFanny，whomIwasjustbringingout，rantoadmirehisspoils，andtobegeachabirdforthemselves。'No，notone!'criedTom。'They'reallmine；uncleRobsongavethemtome-one，two，three，four，five-
youshan'ttouchoneofthem!no，notone，foryourlives!'
continuedhe，exultingly；layingthenestontheground，andstandingoveritwithhislegswideapart，hishandsthrustintohisbreeches-pockets，hisbodybentforward，andhisfacetwistedintoallmannerofcontortionsintheecstasyofhisdelight。
'Butyoushallseemefettle'emoff。Myword，butIWILLwallop'em？SeeifIdon'tnow。Bygum!butthere'sraresportformeinthatnest。'
'But，Tom，'saidI，'Ishallnotallowyoutotorturethosebirds。
Theymusteitherbekilledatonceorcarriedbacktotheplaceyoutookthemfrom，thattheoldbirdsmaycontinuetofeedthem。'
'Butyoudon'tknowwherethatis，Madam:it'sonlymeanduncleRobsonthatknowsthat。'
'Butifyoudon'ttellme，Ishallkillthemmyself-muchasI
hateit。'
'Youdaren't。Youdaren'ttouchthemforyourlife!becauseyouknowpapaandmamma，anduncleRobson，wouldbeangry。Ha，ha!
I'vecaughtyouthere，Miss!'
'IshalldowhatIthinkrightinacaseofthissortwithoutconsultinganyone。Ifyourpapaandmammadon'thappentoapproveofit，Ishallbesorrytooffendthem；butyouruncleRobson'sopinions，ofcourse，arenothingtome。'
Sosaying-urgedbyasenseofduty-attheriskofbothmakingmyselfsickandincurringthewrathofmyemployers-Igotalargeflatstone，thathadbeenrearedupforamouse-trapbythegardener；then，havingoncemorevainlyendeavouredtopersuadethelittletyranttoletthebirdsbecarriedback，Iaskedwhatheintendedtodowiththem。Withfiendishgleehecommencedalistoftorments；andwhilehewasbusiedintherelation，Idroppedthestoneuponhisintendedvictimsandcrushedthemflatbeneathit。
Loudweretheoutcries，terribletheexecrations，consequentuponthisdaringoutrage；uncleRobsonhadbeencomingupthewalkwithhisgun，andwasjustthenpausingtokickhisdog。Tomflewtowardshim，vowinghewouldmakehimkickmeinsteadofJuno。
Mr。
Robsonleantuponhisgun，andlaughedexcessivelyattheviolenceofhisnephew'spassion，andthebittermaledictionsandopprobriousepithetsheheapeduponme。'Well，youAREagood'un!'exclaimedhe，atlength，takinguphisweaponandproceedingtowardsthehouse。'Damme，buttheladhassomespunkinhim，too。
Curseme，ifeverIsawanoblerlittlescoundrelthanthat。He'sbeyondpetticoatgovernmentalready:byGod!hedefiesmother，granny，governess，andall!Ha，ha，ha!Nevermind，Tom，I'llgetyouanotherbroodto-morrow。'
'Ifyoudo，Mr。Robson，Ishallkillthemtoo，'saidI。
'Humph!'repliedhe，andhavinghonouredmewithabroadstare-
which，contrarytohisexpectations，Isustainedwithoutflinching-heturnedawaywithanairofsupremecontempt，andstalkedintothehouse。Tomnextwenttotellhismamma。Itwasnotherwaytosaymuchonanysubject；but，whenshenextsawme，heraspectanddemeanourweredoublydarkandchilled。Aftersomecasualremarkabouttheweather，sheobserved-'Iamsorry，MissGrey，youshouldthinkitnecessarytointerferewithMasterBloomfield'samusements；hewasverymuchdistressedaboutyourdestroyingthebirds。'
'WhenMasterBloomfield'samusementsconsistininjuringsentientcreatures，'Ianswered，'Ithinkitmydutytointerfere。'
'Youseemedtohaveforgotten，'saidshe，calmly，'thatthecreatureswereallcreatedforourconvenience。'
Ithoughtthatdoctrineadmittedsomedoubt，butmerelyreplied-
'Iftheywere，wehavenorighttotormentthemforouramusement。'
'Ithink，'saidshe，'achild'samusementisscarcelytobeweighedagainstthewelfareofasoullessbrute。'
'But，forthechild'sownsake，itoughtnottobeencouragedtohavesuchamusements，'answeredI，asmeeklyasIcould，tomakeupforsuchunusualpertinacity。'"Blessedarethemerciful，fortheyshallobtainmercy。"'
'Oh!ofcourse；butthatreferstoourconducttowardseachother。'
'"Themercifulmanshowsmercytohisbeast，"'Iventuredtoadd。
'IthinkYOUhavenotshownmuchmercy，'repliedshe，withashort，bitterlaugh；'killingthepoorbirdsbywholesaleinthatshockingmanner，andputtingthedearboytosuchmiseryforamerewhim。'
Ijudgeditprudenttosaynomore。ThiswasthenearestapproachtoaquarrelIeverhadwithMrs。Bloomfield；aswellasthegreatestnumberofwordsIeverexchangedwithheratonetime，sincethedayofmyfirstarrival。
ButMr。RobsonandoldMrs。BloomfieldwerenottheonlyguestswhosecomingtoWellwoodHouseannoyedme；everyvisitordisturbedmemoreorless；notsomuchbecausetheyneglectedmethoughI
didfeeltheirconductstrangeanddisagreeableinthatrespect，asbecauseIfounditimpossibletokeepmypupilsawayfromthem，asIwasrepeatedlydesiredtodo:Tommusttalktothem，andMaryAnnmustbenoticedbythem。Neithertheonenortheotherknewwhatitwastofeelanydegreeofshamefacedness，orevencommonmodesty。Theywouldindecentlyandclamorouslyinterrupttheconversationoftheirelders，teasethemwiththemostimpertinentquestions，roughlycollarthegentlemen，climbtheirkneesuninvited，hangabouttheirshouldersorrifletheirpockets，pulltheladies'gowns，disordertheirhair，tumbletheircollars，andimportunatelybegfortheirtrinkets。
Mrs。Bloomfieldhadthesensetobeshockedandannoyedatallthis，butshehadnotsensetopreventit:sheexpectedmetopreventit。ButhowcouldI-whentheguests，withtheirfineclothesandnewfaces，continuallyflatteredandindulgedthem，outofcomplaisancetotheirparents-howcouldI，withmyhomelygarments，every-dayface，andhonestwords，drawthemaway？I
strainedeverynervetodoso:bystrivingtoamusethem，I
endeavouredtoattractthemtomyside；bytheexertionofsuchauthorityasIpossessed，andbysuchseverityasIdaredtouse，I
triedtodeterthemfromtormentingtheguests；andbyreproachingtheirunmannerlyconduct，tomakethemashamedtorepeatit。Buttheyknewnoshame；theyscornedauthoritywhichhadnoterrorstobackit；andasforkindnessandaffection，eithertheyhadnohearts，orsuchastheyhadweresostronglyguarded，andsowellconcealed，thatI，withallmyefforts，hadnotyetdiscoveredhowtoreachthem。
Butsoonmytrialsinthisquartercametoaclose-soonerthanI
eitherexpectedordesired；foronesweeteveningtowardsthecloseofMay，asIwasrejoicinginthenearapproachoftheholidays，andcongratulatingmyselfuponhavingmadesomeprogresswithmypupilsasfarastheirlearningwent，atleast，forIHAD
instilledSOMETHINGintotheirheads，andIhad，atlength，broughtthemtobealittle-averylittle-morerationalaboutgettingtheirlessonsdoneintimetoleavesomespaceforrecreation，insteadoftormentingthemselvesandmealldaylongtonopurpose，Mrs。Bloomfieldsentforme，andcalmlytoldmethatafterMidsummermyserviceswouldbenolongerrequired。Sheassuredmethatmycharacterandgeneralconductwereunexceptionable；butthechildrenhadmadesolittleimprovementsincemyarrivalthatMr。Bloomfieldandshefeltittheirdutytoseeksomeothermodeofinstruction。Thoughsuperiortomostchildrenoftheiryearsinabilities，theyweredecidedlybehindtheminattainments；theirmannerswereuncultivated，andtheirtempersunruly。Andthissheattributedtoawantofsufficientfirmness，anddiligent，perseveringcareonmypart。
Unshakenfirmness，devoteddiligence，unweariedperseverance，unceasingcare，weretheveryqualificationsonwhichIhadsecretlypridedmyself；andbywhichIhadhopedintimetoovercomealldifficulties，andobtainsuccessatlast。Iwishedtosaysomethinginmyownjustification；butinattemptingtospeak，Ifeltmyvoicefalter；andratherthantestifyanyemotion，orsufferthetearstooverflowthatwerealreadygatheringinmyeyes，Ichosetokeepsilence，andbearalllikeaself-convictedculprit。
ThuswasIdismissed，andthusIsoughtmyhome。Alas!whatwouldtheythinkofme？unable，afterallmyboasting，tokeepmyplace，evenforasingleyear，asgovernesstothreesmallchildren，whosemotherwasassertedbymyownaunttobea'verynicewoman。'
Havingbeenthusweighedinthebalanceandfoundwanting，Ineednothopetheywouldbewillingtotrymeagain。Andthiswasanunwelcomethought；forvexed，harassed，disappointedasIhadbeen，andgreatlyasIhadlearnedtoloveandvaluemyhome，Iwasnotyetwearyofadventure，norwillingtorelaxmyefforts。IknewthatallparentswerenotlikeMr。andMrs。Bloomfield，andIwascertainallchildrenwerenotliketheirs。Thenextfamilymustbedifferent，andanychangemustbeforthebetter。Ihadbeenseasonedbyadversity，andtutoredbyexperience，andIlongedtoredeemmylosthonourintheeyesofthosewhoseopinionwasmorethanthatofalltheworldtome。
chapter06
CHAPTERVI-THEPARSONAGEAGAIN
FORafewmonthsIremainedpeaceablyathome，inthequietenjoymentoflibertyandrest，andgenuinefriendship，fromallofwhichIhadfastedsolong；andintheearnestprosecutionofmystudies，torecoverwhatIhadlostduringmystayatWellwoodHouse，andtolayinnewstoresforfutureuse。Myfather'shealthwasstillveryinfirm，butnotmateriallyworsethanwhenIlastsawhim；andIwasgladIhaditinmypowertocheerhimbymyreturn，andtoamusehimwithsinginghisfavouritesongs。
Noonetriumphedovermyfailure，orsaidIhadbetterhavetakenhisorheradvice，andquietlystayedathome。Allweregladtohavemebackagain，andlavishedmorekindnessthaneveruponme，tomakeupforthesufferingsIhadundergone；butnotonewouldtouchashillingofwhatIhadsocheerfullyearnedandsocarefullysaved，inthehopeofsharingitwiththem。Bydintofpinchinghere，andscrapingthere，ourdebtswerealreadynearlypaid。Maryhadhadgoodsuccesswithherdrawings；butourfatherhadinsisteduponHERlikewisekeepingalltheproduceofherindustrytoherself。Allwecouldsparefromthesupplyofourhumblewardrobeandourlittlecasualexpenses，hedirectedustoputintothesavings'-bank；saying，weknewnothowsoonwemightbedependentonthataloneforsupport:forhefelthehadnotlongtobewithus，andwhatwouldbecomeofourmotheranduswhenhewasgone，Godonlyknew!
Dearpapa!ifhehadtroubledhimselflessabouttheafflictionsthatthreatenedusincaseofhisdeath，Iamconvincedthatdreadedeventwouldnothavetakenplacesosoon。Mymotherwouldneversufferhimtoponderonthesubjectifshecouldhelpit。
'Oh，Richard!'exclaimedshe，ononeoccasion，'ifyouwouldbutdismisssuchgloomysubjectsfromyourmind，youwouldliveaslongasanyofus；atleastyouwouldlivetoseethegirlsmarried，andyourselfahappygrandfather，withacantyolddameforyourcompanion。'
Mymotherlaughed，andsodidmyfather:buthislaughsoonperishedinadrearysigh。
'THEYmarried-poorpennilessthings!'saidhe；'whowilltakethemIwonder!'
'Why，nobodyshallthatisn'tthankfulforthem。Wasn'tI
pennilesswhenyoutookme？andyouPRETENDED，atleast，tobevastlypleasedwithyouracquisition。Butit'snomatterwhethertheygetmarriedornot:wecandeviseathousandhonestwaysofmakingalivelihood。AndIwonder，Richard，youcanthinkofbotheringyourheadaboutourPOVERTYincaseofyourdeath；asifTHATwouldbeanythingcomparedwiththecalamityoflosingyou-
anafflictionthatyouwellknowwouldswallowupallothers，andwhichyououghttodoyourutmosttopreserveusfrom:andthereisnothinglikeacheerfulmindforkeepingthebodyinhealth。'
'Iknow，Alice，itiswrongtokeeprepiningasIdo，butIcannothelpit:youmustbearwithme。'
'IWON'Tbearwithyou，ifIcanalteryou，'repliedmymother:
buttheharshnessofherwordswasundonebytheearnestaffectionofhertoneandpleasantsmile，thatmademyfathersmileagain，lesssadlyandlesstransientlythanwashiswont。
'Mamma，'saidI，assoonasIcouldfindanopportunityofspeakingwithheralone，'mymoneyisbutlittle，andcannotlastlong；ifI
couldincreaseit，itwouldlessenpapa'sanxiety，ononesubjectatleast。IcannotdrawlikeMary，andsothebestthingIcoulddowouldbetolookoutforanothersituation。'
'Andsoyouwouldactuallytryagain，Agnes？'
'Decidedly，Iwould。'
'Why，mydear，Ishouldhavethoughtyouhadhadenoughofit。'
'Iknow，'saidI，'everybodyisnotlikeMr。andMrs。Bloomfield-
'
'Someareworse，'interruptedmymother。
'Butnotmany，Ithink，'repliedI，'andI'msureallchildrenarenotliketheirs；forIandMarywerenot:wealwaysdidasyoubidus，didn'twe？'
'Generally:butthen，Ididnotspoilyou；andyouwerenotperfectangelsafterall:Maryhadafundofquietobstinacy，andyouweresomewhatfaultyinregardtotemper；butyouwereverygoodchildrenonthewhole。'
'IknowIwassulkysometimes，andIshouldhavebeengladtoseethesechildrensulkysometimestoo；forthenIcouldhaveunderstoodthem:buttheyneverwere，fortheyCOULDnotbeoffended，norhurt，norashamed:theycouldnotbeunhappyinanyway，exceptwhentheywereinapassion。'
'Well，iftheyCOULDnot，itwasnottheirfault:youcannotexpectstonetobeaspliableasclay。'
'No，butstillitisveryunpleasanttolivewithsuchunimpressible，incomprehensiblecreatures。Youcannotlovethem；
andifyoucould，yourlovewouldbeutterlythrownaway:theycouldneitherreturnit，norvalue，norunderstandit。But，however，evenifIshouldstumbleonsuchafamilyagain，whichisquiteunlikely，Ihaveallthisexperiencetobeginwith，andI
shouldmanagebetteranothertime；andtheendandaimofthispreambleis，letmetryagain。'
'Well，mygirl，youarenoteasilydiscouraged，Isee:Iamgladofthat。But，letmetellyou，youareagooddealpalerandthinnerthanwhenyoufirstlefthome；andwecannothaveyouunderminingyourhealthtohoardupmoneyeitherforyourselforothers。'
'MarytellsmeIamchangedtoo；andIdon'tmuchwonderatit，forIwasinaconstantstateofagitationandanxietyalldaylong:
butnexttimeIamdeterminedtotakethingscoolly。'
Aftersomefurtherdiscussion，mymotherpromisedoncemoretoassistme，providedIwouldwaitandbepatient；andIlefthertobroachthemattertomyfather，whenandhowshedeemeditmostadvisable:neverdoubtingherabilitytoobtainhisconsent。
Meantime，Isearched，withgreatinterest，theadvertisingcolumnsofthenewspapers，andwroteanswerstoevery'WantedaGoverness'
thatappearedatalleligible；butallmyletters，aswellasthereplies，whenIgotany，weredutifullyshowntomymother；andshe，tomychagrin，mademerejectthesituationsoneafteranother:thesewerelowpeople，theseweretooexactingintheirdemands，andthesetooniggardlyintheirremuneration。
'Yourtalentsarenotsuchaseverypoorclergyman'sdaughterpossesses，Agnes，'shewouldsay，'andyoumustnotthrowthemaway。Remember，youpromisedtobepatient:thereisnoneedofhurry:youhaveplentyoftimebeforeyou，andmayhavemanychancesyet。'
Atlength，sheadvisedmetoputanadvertisement，myself，inthepaper，statingmyqualifications，&；c。
'Music，singing，drawing，French，Latin，andGerman，'saidshe，'arenomeanassemblage:manywillbegladtohavesomuchinoneinstructor；andthistime，youshalltryyourfortuneinasomewhathigherfamilyinthatofsomegenuine，thoroughbredgentleman；forsucharefarmorelikelytotreatyouwithproperrespectandconsiderationthanthosepurse-proudtradespeopleandarrogantupstarts。Ihaveknownseveralamongthehigherrankswhotreatedtheirgovernessesquiteasoneofthefamily；thoughsome，Iallow，areasinsolentandexactingasanyoneelsecanbe:fortherearebadandgoodinallclasses。'
Theadvertisementwasquicklywrittenanddespatched。Ofthetwopartieswhoansweredit，butonewouldconsenttogivemefiftypounds，thesummymotherbademenameasthesalaryIshouldrequire；andhere，Ihesitatedaboutengagingmyself，asIfearedthechildrenwouldbetooold，andtheirparentswouldrequiresomeonemoreshowy，ormoreexperienced，ifnotmoreaccomplishedthanI。Butmymotherdissuadedmefromdecliningitonthataccount:
Ishoulddovastlywell，shesaid，ifIwouldonlythrowasidemydiffidence，andacquirealittlemoreconfidenceinmyself。I
wasjusttogiveaplain，truestatementofmyacquirementsandqualifications，andnamewhatstipulationsIchosetomake，andthenawaittheresult。TheonlystipulationIventuredtopropose，wasthatImightbeallowedtwomonths'holidaysduringtheyeartovisitmyfriends，atMidsummerandChristmas。Theunknownlady，inherreply，madenoobjectiontothis，andstatedthat，astomyacquirements，shehadnodoubtIshouldbeabletogivesatisfaction；butintheengagementofgovernessessheconsideredthosethingsasbutsubordinatepoints；asbeingsituatedintheneighbourhoodofO-，shecouldgetmasterstosupplyanydeficienciesinthatrespect:but，inheropinion，nexttounimpeachablemorality，amildandcheerfultemperandobligingdispositionwerethemostessentialrequisities。
Mymotherdidnotrelishthisatall，andnowmademanyobjectionstomyacceptingthesituation；inwhichmysisterwarmlysupportedher:but，unwillingtobebalkedagain，Ioverruledthemall；
and，havingfirstobtainedtheconsentofmyfatherwhohad，ashorttimepreviously，beenapprisedofthesetransactions，Iwroteamostobligingepistletomyunknowncorrespondent，and，finally，thebargainwasconcluded。
ItwasdecreedthatonthelastdayofJanuaryIwastoenteruponmynewofficeasgovernessinthefamilyofMr。Murray，ofHortonLodge，nearO-，aboutseventymilesfromourvillage:aformidabledistancetome，asIhadneverbeenabovetwentymilesfromhomeinallthecourseofmytwentyyears'sojournonearth；andas，moreover，everyindividualinthatfamilyandintheneighbourhoodwasutterlyunknowntomyselfandallmyacquaintances。Butthisrendereditonlythemorepiquanttome。Ihadnow，insomemeasure，gotridoftheMAUVAISEHONTEthathadformerlyoppressedmesomuch；therewasapleasingexcitementintheideaofenteringtheseunknownregions，andmakingmywayaloneamongitsstrangeinhabitants。InowflatteredmyselfIwasgoingtoseesomethingintheworld:Mr。Murray'sresidencewasnearalargetown，andnotinamanufacturingdistrict，wherethepeoplehadnothingtodobuttomakemoney；hisrankfromwhatIcouldgather，appearedtobehigherthanthatofMr。Bloomfield；and，doubtless，hewasoneofthosegenuinethorough-bredgentrymymotherspokeof，whowouldtreathisgovernesswithdueconsiderationasarespectablewell-
educatedlady，theinstructorandguideofhischildren，andnotamereupperservant。Then，mypupilsbeingolder，wouldbemorerational，moreteachable，andlesstroublesomethanthelast；theywouldbelessconfinedtotheschoolroom，andnotrequirethatconstantlabourandincessantwatching；and，finally，brightvisionsmingledwithmyhopes，withwhichthecareofchildrenandthemeredutiesofagovernesshadlittleornothingtodo。Thus，thereaderwillseethatIhadnoclaimtoberegardedasamartyrtofilialpiety，goingforthtosacrificepeaceandlibertyforthesolepurposeoflayingupstoresforthecomfortandsupportofmyparents:thoughcertainlythecomfortofmyfather，andthefuturesupportofmymother，hadalargeshareinmycalculations；andfiftypoundsappearedtomenoordinarysum。Imusthavedecentclothesbecomingmystation；Imust，itseemed，putoutmywashing，andalsopayformyfourannualjourneysbetweenHortonLodgeandhome；butwithstrictattentiontoeconomy，surelytwentypounds，orlittlemore，wouldcoverthoseexpenses，andthentherewouldbethirtyforthebank，orlittleless:whatavaluableadditiontoourstock!Oh，Imuststruggletokeepthissituation，whateveritmightbe!bothformyownhonouramongmyfriendsandforthesolidservicesImightrenderthembymycontinuancethere。
chapter07
CHAPTERVII-HORTONLODGE
THE31stofJanuarywasawild，tempestuousday:therewasastrongnorthwind，withacontinualstormofsnowdriftingonthegroundandwhirlingthroughtheair。Myfriendswouldhavehadmedelaymydeparture，butfearfulofprejudicingmyemployersagainstmebysuchwantofpunctualityatthecommencementofmyundertaking，Ipersistedinkeepingtheappointment。
Iwillnotinflictuponmyreadersanaccountofmyleavinghomeonthatdarkwintermorning:thefondfarewells，thelong，longjourneytoO-，thesolitarywaitingsininnsforcoachesortrains-forthereweresomerailwaysthen-and，finally，themeetingatO-withMr。Murray'sservant，whohadbeensentwiththephaetontodrivemefromthencetoHortonLodge。Iwilljuststatethattheheavysnowhadthrownsuchimpedimentsinthewayofbothhorsesandsteam-engines，thatitwasdarksomehoursbeforeIreachedmyjourney'send，andthatamostbewilderingstormcameonatlast，whichmadethefewmiles'spacebetweenO-andHortonLodgealongandformidablepassage。Isatresigned，withthecold，sharpsnowdriftingthroughmyveilandfillingmylap，seeingnothing，andwonderinghowtheunfortunatehorseanddrivercouldmaketheirwayevenaswellastheydid；andindeeditwasbutatoilsome，creepingstyleofprogression，tosaythebestofit。Atlengthwepaused；and，atthecallofthedriver，someoneunlatchedandrolledbackupontheircreakinghingeswhatappearedtobetheparkgates。Thenweproceededalongasmootherroad，whence，occasionally，Iperceivedsomehuge，hoarymassgleamingthroughthedarkness，whichItooktobeaportionofasnow-cladtree。
Afteraconsiderabletimewepausedagain，beforethestatelyporticoofalargehousewithlongwindowsdescendingtotheground。
Irosewithsomedifficultyfromunderthesuperincumbentsnowdrift，andalightedfromthecarriage，expectingthatakindandhospitablereceptionwouldindemnifymeforthetoilsandhardshipsoftheday。Agentlemanpersoninblackopenedthedoor，andadmittedmeintoaspacioushall，lightedbyanamber-colouredlampsuspendedfromtheceiling；heledmethroughthis，alongapassage，andopeningthedoorofabackroom，toldmethatwastheschoolroom。Ientered，andfoundtwoyoungladiesandtwoyounggentlemen-myfuturepupils，Isupposed。Afteraformalgreeting，theeldergirl，whowastriflingoverapieceofcanvasandabasketofGermanwools，askedifIshouldliketogoupstairs。
I
repliedintheaffirmative，ofcourse。
'Matilda，takeacandle，andshowherherroom，'saidshe。
MissMatilda，astrappinghoydenofaboutfourteen，withashortfrockandtrousers，shruggedhershouldersandmadeaslightgrimace，buttookacandleandproceededbeforemeupthebackstairsalong，steep，doubleflight，andthroughalong，narrowpassage，toasmallbuttolerablycomfortableroom。ShethenaskedmeifIwouldtakesometeaorcoffee。IwasabouttoanswerNo；
butrememberingthatIhadtakennothingsinceseveno'clockthatmorning，andfeelingfaintinconsequence，IsaidIwouldtakeacupoftea。Sayingshewouldtell'Brown，'theyoungladydeparted；andbythetimeIhaddivestedmyselfofmyheavy，wetcloak，shawl，bonnet，&；c。，amincingdamselcametosaytheyoungladiesdesiredtoknowwhetherIwouldtakemyteaupthereorintheschoolroom。UnderthepleaoffatigueIchosetotakeitthere。Shewithdrew；and，afterawhile，returnedagainwithasmalltea-tray，andplaceditonthechestofdrawers，whichservedasadressing-table。Havingcivillythankedher，IaskedatwhattimeIshouldbeexpectedtoriseinthemorning。
'Theyoungladiesandgentlemenbreakfastathalf-pasteight，ma'am，'saidshe；'theyriseearly；but，astheyseldomdoanylessonsbeforebreakfast，Ishouldthinkitwilldoifyourisesoonafterseven。'
Idesiredhertobesokindastocallmeatseven，and，promisingtodoso，shewithdrew。Then，havingbrokenmylongfastonacupofteaandalittlethinbreadandbutter，Isatdownbesidethesmall，smoulderingfire，andamusedmyselfwithaheartyfitofcrying；afterwhich，Isaidmyprayers，andthen，feelingconsiderablyrelieved，begantoprepareforbed。Findingthatnoneofmyluggagewasbroughtup，Iinstitutedasearchforthebell；
andfailingtodiscoveranysignsofsuchaconvenienceinanycorneroftheroom，Itookmycandleandventuredthroughthelongpassage，anddownthesteepstairs，onavoyageofdiscovery。
Meetingawell-dressedfemaleontheway，ItoldherwhatIwanted；
butnotwithoutconsiderablehesitation，asIwasnotquitesurewhetheritwasoneoftheupperservants，orMrs。Murrayherself:
ithappened，however，tobethelady's-maid。Withtheairofoneconferringanunusualfavour，shevouchsafedtoundertakethesendingupofmythings；andwhenIhadre-enteredmyroom，andwaitedandwonderedalongtimegreatlyfearingthatshehadforgottenorneglectedtoperformherpromise，anddoubtingwhethertokeepwaitingorgotobed，orgodownagain，myhopes，atlength，wererevivedbythesoundofvoicesandlaughter，accompaniedbythetrampoffeetalongthepassage；andpresentlytheluggagewasbroughtinbyarough-lookingmaidandaman，neitherofthemveryrespectfulintheirdemeanourtome。Havingshutthedoorupontheirretiringfootsteps，andunpackedafewofmythings，Ibetookmyselftorest；gladlyenough，forIwaswearyinbodyandmind。
Itwaswithastrangefeelingofdesolation，mingledwithastrongsenseofthenoveltyofmysituation，andajoylesskindofcuriosityconcerningwhatwasyetunknown，thatIawokethenextmorning；feelinglikeonewhirledawaybyenchantment，andsuddenlydroppedfromthecloudsintoaremoteandunknownland，widelyandcompletelyisolatedfromallhehadeverseenorknownbefore；orlikeathistle-seedborneonthewindtosomestrangenookofuncongenialsoil，whereitmustlielongenoughbeforeitcantakerootandgerminate，extractingnourishmentfromwhatappearssoalientoitsnature:if，indeed，itevercan。Butthisgivesnoproperideaofmyfeelingsatall；andnoonethathasnotlivedsucharetired，stationarylifeasmine，canpossiblyimaginewhattheywere:hardlyevenifhehasknownwhatitistoawakesomemorning，andfindhimselfinPortNelson，inNewZealand，withaworldofwatersbetweenhimselfandallthatknewhim。
IshallnotsoonforgetthepeculiarfeelingwithwhichIraisedmyblindandlookedoutupontheunknownworld:awide，whitewildernesswasallthatmetmygaze；awasteofDesertstossedinsnow，Andheavyladengroves。
Idescendedtotheschoolroomwithnoremarkableeagernesstojoinmypupils，thoughnotwithoutsomefeelingofcuriosityrespectingwhatafurtheracquaintancewouldreveal。Onething，amongothersofmoreobviousimportance，Ideterminedwithmyself-ImustbeginwithcallingthemMissandMaster。Itseemedtomeachillingandunnaturalpieceofpunctiliobetweenthechildrenofafamilyandtheirinstructoranddailycompanion；especiallywheretheformerwereintheirearlychildhood，asatWellwoodHouse；buteventhere，mycallingthelittleBloomfieldsbytheirsimplenameshadbeenregardedasanoffensiveliberty:astheirparentshadtakencaretoshowme，bycarefullydesignatingthemMASTERandMISS
Bloomfield，&；c。，inspeakingtome。Ihadbeenveryslowtotakethehint，becausethewholeaffairstruckmeassoveryabsurd；butnowIdeterminedtobewiser，andbeginatoncewithasmuchformandceremonyasanymemberofthefamilywouldbelikelytorequire:and，indeed，thechildrenbeingsomucholder，therewouldbelessdifficulty；thoughthelittlewordsMissandMasterseemedtohaveasurprisingeffectinrepressingallfamiliar，open-heartedkindness，andextinguishingeverygleamofcordialitythatmightarisebetweenus。
AsIcannot，likeDogberry，finditinmyhearttobestowallmytediousnessuponthereader，Iwillnotgoontoborehimwithaminutedetailofallthediscoveriesandproceedingsofthisandthefollowingday。Nodoubthewillbeamplysatisfiedwithaslightsketchofthedifferentmembersofthefamily，andageneralviewofthefirstyearortwoofmysojournamongthem。
Tobeginwiththehead:Mr。Murraywas，byallaccounts，ablustering，roystering，countrysquire:adevotedfox-hunter，askilfulhorse-jockeyandfarrier，anactive，practicalfarmer，andaheartyBONVIVANT。Byallaccounts，Isay；for，exceptonSundays，whenhewenttochurch，Ineversawhimfrommonthtomonth:unless，incrossingthehallorwalkinginthegrounds，thefigureofatall，stoutgentleman，withscarletcheeksandcrimsonnose，happenedtocomeacrossme；onwhichoccasions，ifhepassednearenoughtospeak，anunceremoniousnod，accompaniedbya'Morning，MissGrey，'orsomesuchbriefsalutation，wasusuallyvouchsafed。Frequently，indeed，hisloudlaughreachedmefromafar；andoftenerstillIheardhimswearingandblasphemingagainstthefootmen，groom，coachman，orsomeotherhaplessdependant。
Mrs。Murraywasahandsome，dashingladyofforty，whocertainlyrequiredneitherrougenorpaddingtoaddtohercharms；andwhosechiefenjoymentswere，orseemedtobe，ingivingorfrequentingparties，andindressingattheverytopofthefashion。Ididnotseehertilleleveno'clockonthemorningaftermyarrival；whenshehonouredmewithavisit，justasmymothermightstepintothekitchentoseeanewservant-girl:yetnotso，either，formymotherwouldhaveseenherimmediatelyafterherarrival，andnotwaitedtillthenextday；and，moreover，shewouldhaveaddressedherinamorekindandfriendlymanner，andgivenhersomewordsofcomfortaswellasaplainexpositionofherduties；butMrs。
Murraydidneithertheonenortheother。Shejuststeppedintotheschoolroomonherreturnfromorderingdinnerinthehousekeeper'sroom，bademegood-morning，stoodfortwominutesbythefire，saidafewwordsabouttheweatherandthe'ratherrough'
journeyImusthavehadyesterday；pettedheryoungestchild-aboyoften-whohadjustbeenwipinghismouthandhandsonhergown，afterindulginginsomesavourymorselfromthehouse-
keeper'sstore；toldmewhatasweet，goodboyhewas；andthensailedout，withaself-complacentsmileuponherface:thinking，nodoubt，thatshehaddonequiteenoughforthepresent，andhadbeendelightfullycondescendingintothebargain。Herchildrenevidentlyheldthesameopinion，andIalonethoughtotherwise。
Afterthisshelookedinuponmeonceortwice，duringtheabsenceofmypupils，toenlightenmeconcerningmydutiestowardsthem。
Forthegirlssheseemedanxiousonlytorenderthemassuperficiallyattractiveandshowilyaccomplishedastheycouldpossiblybemade，withoutpresenttroubleordiscomforttothemselves；andIwastoactaccordingly-tostudyandstrivetoamuseandoblige，instruct，refine，andpolish，withtheleastpossibleexertionontheirpart，andnoexerciseofauthorityonmine。Withregardtothetwoboys，itwasmuchthesame；onlyinsteadofaccomplishments，IwastogetthegreatestpossiblequantityofLatingrammarandValpy'sDelectusintotheirheads，inordertofitthemforschool-thegreatestpossiblequantityatleastWITHOUTtroubletothemselves。Johnmightbea'littlehigh-
spirited，'andCharlesmightbealittle'nervousandtedious-'
'Butatallevents，MissGrey，'saidshe，'IhopeYOUwillkeepyourtemper，andbemildandpatientthroughout；especiallywiththedearlittleCharles；heissoextremelynervousandsusceptible，andsoutterlyunaccustomedtoanythingbutthetenderesttreatment。Youwillexcusemynamingthesethingstoyou；forthefactis，Ihavehithertofoundallthegovernesses，eventheverybestofthem，faultyinthisparticular。Theywantedthatmeekandquietspirit，whichSt。Matthew，orsomeofthem，saysisbetterthantheputtingonofapparel-youwillknowthepassagetowhichIallude，foryouareaclergyman'sdaughter。
ButIhavenodoubtyouwillgivesatisfactioninthisrespectaswellastherest。Andremember，onalloccasions，whenanyoftheyoungpeopledoanythingimproper，ifpersuasionandgentleremonstrancewillnotdo，letoneoftheotherscomeandtellme；forIcanspeaktothemmoreplainlythanitwouldbeproperforyoutodo。
Andmakethemashappyasyoucan，MissGrey，andIdaresayyouwilldoverywell。'
IobservedthatwhileMrs。Murraywassoextremelysolicitousforthecomfortandhappinessofherchildren，andcontinuallytalkingaboutit，sheneveroncementionedmine；thoughtheywereathome，surroundedbyfriends，andIanalienamongstrangers；andIdidnotyetknowenoughoftheworld，nottobeconsiderablysurprisedatthisanomaly。
MissMurray，otherwiseRosalie，wasaboutsixteenwhenIcame，anddecidedlyaveryprettygirl；andintwoyearslonger，astimemorecompletelydevelopedherformandaddedgracetohercarriageanddeportment，shebecamepositivelybeautiful；andthatinnocommondegree。Shewastallandslender，yetnotthin；perfectlyformed，exquisitelyfair，thoughnotwithoutabrilliant，healthybloom；
herhair，whichsheworeinaprofusionoflongringlets，wasofaverylightbrownincliningtoyellow；hereyeswerepaleblue，butsoclearandbrightthatfewwouldwishthemdarker；therestofherfeaturesweresmall，notquiteregular，andnotremarkablyotherwise:butaltogetheryoucouldnothesitatetopronounceheraverylovelygirl。IwishIcouldsayasmuchformindanddispositionasIcanforherformandface。
YetthinknotIhaveanydreadfuldisclosurestomake:shewaslively，light-hearted，andcouldbeveryagreeable，withthosewhodidnotcrossherwill。Towardsme，whenIfirstcame，shewascoldandhaughty，theninsolentandoverbearing；but，onafurtheracquaintance，shegraduallylaidasideherairs，andintimebecameasdeeplyattachedtomeasitwaspossibleforHERtobetooneofmycharacterandposition:forsheseldomlostsight，forabovehalfanhouratatime，ofthefactofmybeingahirelingandapoorcurate'sdaughter。Andyet，uponthewhole，Ibelievesherespectedmemorethansheherselfwasawareof；becauseIwastheonlypersoninthehousewhosteadilyprofessedgoodprinciples，habituallyspokethetruth，andgenerallyendeavouredtomakeinclinationbowtoduty；andthisIsay，not，ofcourse，incommendationofmyself，buttoshowtheunfortunatestateofthefamilytowhichmyserviceswere，forthepresent，devoted。TherewasnomemberofitinwhomIregrettedthissadwantofprinciplesomuchasMissMurrayherself；notonlybecauseshehadtakenafancytome，butbecausetherewassomuchofwhatwaspleasantandprepossessinginherself，that，inspiteofherfailings，Ireallylikedher-whenshedidnotrousemyindignation，orrufflemytemperbyTOOgreatadisplayofherfaults。These，however，I