Theeconomistsandcalculatorsmighthereinterposewithagreatdealofreason;for，indeed，therewasnoreasonwhyanationshouldimpoverishitselftodohonortothememoryofanindividualforwhom，afterall，itcanfeelbutaqualifiedenthusiasm:butitsurelymighthaveemployedthelargesumvotedforthepurposemorewiselyandgenerously，andrecordeditsrespectforNapoleonbysomeworthyandlastingmemorial，ratherthanhaveerectedyonderthousandvainheapsoftinsel，paint，andplaster，thatarealreadycrackingandcrumblinginthefrost，atthreedaysold。
　　Scarcelyoneofthestatues，indeed，deservestolastamonth:someareodiousdistortionsandcaricatures，whichnevershouldhavebeenallowedtostandforamoment。Ontheverydayofthefete，thewindwasshakingthecanvaspedestals，andtheflimsywood—workhadbeguntogapeandgiveway。Atalittledistance，tobesure，youcouldnotseethecracks;andpedestalsandstatuesLOOKEDlikemarble。Atsomedistance，youcouldnottellbutthatthewreathsandeaglesweregoldembroidery，andnotgiltpaper——thegreattricolorflagsdamask，andnotstripedcalico。Onewouldthinkthattheseshamsplendorsbetokenedshamrespect，ifonehadnotknownthatthenameofNapoleonisheldinrealreverence，andobservedsomewhatofthecharacterofthenation。Realfeelingstheyhave，buttheydistortthembyexaggeration;realcourage，whichtheyrenderludicrousbyintolerablebraggadocio;andIthinktheaboveofficialaccountofthePrincedeJoinville'sproceedings，ofthemannerinwhichtheEmperor'sremainshavebeentreatedintheirvoyagetothecapital，andofthepreparationsmadetoreceivehiminit，willgivemydearMissSmithsomemeansofunderstandingthesocialandmoralconditionofthisworthypeopleofFrance。
　　III。
　　ONTHEFUNERALCEREMONY。
　　ShallItellyou，mydear，thatwhenFrancoiswokemeataveryearlyhouronthiseventfulmorning，whilethekeenstarswerestillglitteringoverhead，ahalf—moon，assharpasarazor，beaminginthefrostysky，andawickednorthwindblowing，thatblewthebloodoutofone'sfingersandfrozeyourlegasyouputitoutofbed;——
　　shallItellyou，mydear，thatwhenFrancoiscalledme，andsaid，"V'lavot'cafe，MonsieurTitemasse，buvez—le，tiens，ilesttoutchaud，"Ifeltmyself，afterimbibingthehotbreakfast，socomfortableunderthreeblanketsandamackintosh，thatforatleastaquarterofanhournomaninEuropecouldsaywhetherTitmarshwouldorwouldnotbepresentattheburialoftheEmperorNapoleon。
　　Besides，mydear，thecold，therewasanotherreasonfordoubting。
　　DidtheFrenchnation，ordidtheynot，intendtoofferupsomeofusEnglishovertheimperialgrave？Andwerethegamestobeconcludedbyamassacre？ItwassaidinthenewspapersthatLordGranvillehaddespatchedcircularstoalltheEnglishresidentinParis，beggingthemtokeeptheirhomes。TheFrenchjournalsannouncedthisnews，andwarneduscharitablyofthefateintendedforus。HadLordGranvillewritten？Certainlynottome。OrhadhewrittentoallEXCEPTME？AndwasITHEVICTIM——thedoomedone？——
　　tobeseizeddirectlyIshowedmyfaceintheChampsElysees，andtorninpiecesbyFrenchPatriotismtothefranticchorusofthe"Marseillaise？"Dependonit，Madam，thathighandlowinthiscityonTuesdaywerenotaltogetherattheirease，andthatthebravestfeltnosmalltremor！Andbesureofthis，thatashisMajestyLouisPhilippetookhisnightcapoffhisroyalheadthatmorning，heprayedheartilythathemight，atnight，putitoninsafety。
　　Well，asmycompanionandIcameoutofdoors，beingboundfortheChurchoftheInvalides，forwhichaDeputyhadkindlyfurnisheduswithtickets，wesawtheveryprettiestsightofthewholeday，andIcan'trefrainfrommentioningittomydear，tender—heartedMissSmith。
　　InthesamehousewhereIlive（butaboutfivestoriesnearertheground）lodgesanEnglishfamily，consistingof——1。Agreat—
　　grandmother，ahale，handsomeoldladyofseventy，theverybest—
　　dressedandneatestoldladyinParis。2。Agrandfatherandgrandmother，tolerablyyoungtobearthattitle。3。Adaughter。
　　And4。Twolittlegreat—grand，orgrandchildren，thatmaybeoftheageofthreeandone，andbelongtoasonanddaughterwhoareinIndia。Thegrandfather，whoisasproudofhiswifeashewasthirtyyearsagowhenhemarried，andpayshercomplimentsstilltwiceorthriceinaday，andwhenheleadsherintoaroomlooksroundatthepersonsassembled，andsaysinhisheart，"Here，gentlemen，hereismywife——showmesuchanotherwomaninEngland，"——
　　thisgentlemanhadhiredaroomontheChampsElysees，forhewouldnothavehiswifecatchcoldbyexposinghertothebalconiesintheopenair。
　　WhenIcametothestreet，Ifoundthefamilyassembledinthefollowingorderofmarch:——
　　——No。1，thegreat—grandmotherwalkingdaintilyalong，supportedbyNo。3，hergranddaughter。
　　——AnursecarryingNo。4junior，whowassoundasleep:andahugebasketcontainingsaucepans，bottlesofmilk，parcelsofinfants'
　　food，certaindimitynapkins，achild'scoral，andalittlehorsebelongingtoNo。4senior。
　　——Aservantbearingabasketofcondiments。
　　——No。2，grandfather，spickandspan，cleanshaved，hatbrushed，whitebuckskingloves，bamboocane，browngreat—coat，walkingasuprightandsolemnasmaybe，havinghisladyonhisarm。
　　——No。4，senior，withmottledlegsandatartancostume，whowasfriskingaboutbetweenhisgrandpapa'slegs，whoheartilywishedhimathome。
　　"Mydear，"hisfaceseemedtosaytohislady，"Ithinkyoumighthaveleftthelittlethingsinthenursery，forweshallhavetosqueezethroughaterriblecrowdintheChampsElysees。"
　　Theladywasgoingoutforaday'spleasure，andherfacewasfullofcare:shehadtolookfirstafterheroldmotherwhowaswalkingahead，thenafterNo。4juniorwiththenurse——hemightfallintoallsortsofdanger，wakeup，cry，catchcold;nursemightslipdown，orheavenknowswhat。Thenshehadtolookherhusbandintheface，whohadgonetosuchexpenseandbeensokindforhersake，andmakethatgentlemanbelieveshewasthoroughlyhappy;and，finally，shehadtokeepaneyeuponNo。4senior，who，asshewasperfectlycertain，wasaboutintwominutestobelostforever，ortrampledtopiecesinthecrowd。
　　TheseeventstookplaceinaquietlittlestreetleadingintotheChampsElysees，theentryofwhichwehadalmostreachedbythistime。Thefourdetachmentsabovedescribed，whichhadbeenstragglingalittleintheirpassagedownthestreet，closedupattheendofit，andstoodforamomenthuddledtogether。No。3，MissX——，beganspeakingtohercompanionthegreat—grandmother。
　　"Hush，mydear，"saidthatoldlady，lookingroundalarmedatherdaughter。"SPEAKFRENCH。"Andshestraightwaybegannervouslytomakeaspeechwhichshesupposedtobeinthatlanguage，butwhichwasasmuchlikeFrenchasIroquois。Thewholesecretwasout:youcouldreaditinthegrandmother'sface，whowasdoingallshecouldtokeepfromcrying，andlookedasfrightenedasshedaredtolook。
　　ThetwoelderladieshadsettledbetweenthemthattherewasgoingtobeageneralEnglishslaughterthatday，andhadbroughtthechildrenwiththem，sothattheymightallbemurderedincompany。
　　Godblessyou，Owomen，moist—eyedandtender—hearted！Inthosegentlesillytearsofyoursthereissomethingtouchesone，betheyneversofoolish。Idon'tthinkthereweremanysuchnaturaldropsshedthatdayasthosewhichjustmadetheirappearanceinthegrandmother'seyes，andthenwentbackagainasiftheyhadbeenashamedofthemselves，whilethegoodladyandherlittletroopwalkedacrosstheroad。Thinkhowhappyshewillbewhennightcomes，andtherehasbeennomurderofEnglish，andthebroodisallnestledunderherwingssoundasleep，andsheislyingawakethankingGodthatthedayanditspleasuresandpainsareover。
　　Whilstwewereconsideringthesethings，thegrandfatherhadsuddenlyelevatedNo。4senioruponhisleftshoulder，andIsawthetartanhatofthatyounggentleman，andthebamboocanewhichhadbeentransferredtohim，highovertheheadsofthecrowdontheoppositesidethroughwhichthepartymoved。
　　Afterthislittleprocessionhadpassedaway——youmaylaughatit，butuponmywordandconscience，MissSmith，Isawnothinginthecourseofthedaywhichaffectedmemore——afterthislittleprocessionhadpassedaway，theothercame，accompaniedbygun—