SOMETHINGisthereaboutPeacockthatwedon'tpossess。Strainyourneckeverso，youcan'tmakeitaslongorasblueashis——cockyourtailasmuchasyouplease，anditwillneverbehalfsofinetolookat。Butthemostabsurd，disgusting，contemptiblesightintheworldwouldyouandIbe，leavingthebarn—doorformylady'sflower—garden，forsakingournaturalsturdywalkforthepeacock'sgenteelricketystride，andadoptingthesqueakofhisvoiceintheplaceofourgallantlustycock—a—doodle—dooing。
　　Doyoutaketheallegory？Ilovetospeakinsuch，andtheabovetypeshavebeenpresentedtomymindwhilesittingoppositeagimcrackcoat—of—armsandcoronetthatarepaintedintheInvalidesChurch，andassignedtooneoftheEmperor'sGenerals。
　　Ventrebleu！Madam，whatneedhaveTHEYofcoats—of—armsandcoronets，andwretchedimitationsofoldexplodedaristocraticgewgawsthattheyhadflungoutofthecountry——withtheheadsoftheownersinthemsometimes，forindeedtheywerenotparticular——ascoreofyearsbefore？Whatbusiness，forsooth，hadtheytobemeddlingwithgentilityandapingitsways，whohadcourage，merit，daring，geniussometimes，andaprideoftheirowntosupport，ifproudtheywereinclinedtobe？Acleveryoungman（whowasnotofhighfamilyhimself，buthadbeenbredupgenteellyatEtonandtheuniversity）——youngMr。GeorgeCanning，atthecommencementoftheFrenchRevolution，sneeredat"RolandtheJust，withribbonsinhisshoes，"andthedandies，whothenworebuckles，votedthesarcasmmonstrouskilling。Itwasajoke，mydear，worthyofalackey，orofasillysmartparvenu，notknowingthesocietyintowhichhisluckhadcasthim（Godhelphim！inlateryears，theytaughthimwhattheywere！），andfancyinginhissillyintoxicationthatsimplicitywasludicrousandfashionrespectable。See，now，fiftyyearsaregone，andwhereareshoebuckles？Extinct，defunct，kickedintotheirrevocablepastoffthetoesofallEurope！
　　Howfataltotheparvenu，throughouthistory，hasbeenthisrespectforshoebuckles。Where，forinstance，wouldtheEmpireofNapoleonhavebeen，ifNeyandLanneshadneversportedsuchathingasacoat—of—arms，andhadonlywrittentheirsimplenamesontheirshields，afterthefashionofDesaix'sscutcheonyonder？——theboldRepublicanwholedthecrowningchargeatMarengo，andsentthebestbloodoftheHolyRomanEmpiretotheright—about，beforethewretchedmisbegottenimperialheraldrywasborn，thatwastoprovesodisastroustothefatherofit。Ithasalwaysbeenso。Theywon'tamalgamate。Acountrymustbegovernedbytheoneprincipleortheother。Butgive，inarepublic，anaristocracyeversolittlechance，anditworksandplotsandsneaksandbulliesandsneersitselfintoplace，andyoufinddemocracyoutofdoors。Isitgoodthatthearistocracyshouldsotriumph？——thatisaquestionthatyoumaysettleaccordingtoyourownnotionsandtaste;andpermitmetosay，Idonotcaretwopencehowyousettleit。Largebookshavebeenwrittenuponthesubjectinavarietyoflanguages，andcomingtoavarietyofconclusions。Greatstatesmenarethereinourcountry，fromLordLondonderrydowntoMr。Vincent，eachinhisdegreemaintaininghisdifferentopinion。Buthere，inthematterofNapoleon，isasimplefact:hefoundedagreat，glorious，strong，potentrepublic，abletocopewiththebestaristocraciesintheworld，andperhapstobeatthemall;heconvertshisrepublicintoamonarchy，andsurroundshismonarchywithwhathecallsaristocraticinstitutions;andyouknowwhatbecomesofhim。Thepeopleestranged，thearistocracyfaithless（whendidtheyeverpardononewhowasnotofthemselves？）——theimperialfabrictumblestotheground。Ifitteachesnothingelse，mydear，itteachesoneagreatpointofpolicy——namely，tostickbyone'sparty。
　　Whilethesethoughts（andsundryothersrelativetothehorriblecoldoftheplace，theintensedulnessofdelay，thestupidityofleavingawarmbedandabreakfastinordertowitnessaprocessionthatismuchbetterperformedatatheatre）——whilethesethoughtswerepassinginthemind，thechurchbegantofillapace，andyousawthatthehouroftheceremonywasdrawingnear。
　　Imprimis，camemenwithlightedstaves，andsetfiretoatleasttenthousandwax—candlesthatwerehanginginbrilliantchandeliersinvariouspartsofthechapel。Curtainsweredroppedovertheupperwindowsastheseilluminationswereeffected，andthechurchwasleftonlytothefunereallightofthespermaceti。Totherightwasthedome，roundthecavityofwhichsparklinglampswereset，thatdesignedtheshapeofitbrilliantlyagainstthedarkness。Inthemidst，andwherethealtarusedtostand，rosethecatafalque。Andwhynot？WhoisGodherebutNapoleon？andinhimthescepticshavealreadyceasedtobelieve;butthepeopledoesstillsomewhat。HeandLouisXIV。dividetheworshipoftheplacebetweenthem。
　　Asforthecatafalque，thebestthatIcansayforitisthatitisreallyanobleandimposing—lookingedifice，withtallpillarssupportingagranddome，withinnumerableescutcheons，standards，andallusionsmilitaryandfunereal。Agreateagleofcoursetopsthewhole:tripodsburningspiritsofwinestandroundthiskindofdeadman'sthrone，andaswesawit（bypeeringovertheheadsofourneighborsinthefrontrank），itlooked，inthemidstoftheblackconcave，andundertheeffectofhalfathousandflashingcross—lights，properlygrandandtall。Theeffectofthewholechapel，however（tospeakthejargonofthepainting—room），wasspoiledbybeingCUTUP:thereweretoomanyobjectsfortheeyetorestupon:thetenthousandwax—candles，forinstance，intheirnumberlesstwinklingchandeliers，therawtranchantcolorsofthenewbanners，wreaths，bees，N's，andotheremblemsdottingtheplaceallover，andincessantlypuzzling，orratherBOTHERINGthebeholder。
　　Highoverhead，inasortofmist，withtheglareoftheiroriginalcolorsworndownbydustandtime，hunglongrowsofdimghostly—
　　lookingstandards，capturedinolddaysfromtheenemy。Theywere，Ithought，thebestandmostsolemnpartoftheshow。
　　Tosupposethatthepeoplewereboundtobesolemnduringtheceremonyistoexactfromthemsomethingquiteneedlessandunnatural。Theveryfactofasqueezedissipatesallsolemnity。
　　Onegreatcrowdisalways，asIimagine，prettymuchlikeanother。
　　InthecourseofthelastfewyearsIhaveseenthree:thatattendingthecoronationofourpresentsovereign，thatwhichwenttoseeCourvoisierhanged，andthiswhichwitnessedtheNapoleonceremony。Thepeoplesoassembledforhourstogetherarejocularratherthansolemn，seekingtopassawaythewearytimewiththebestamusementsthatwilloffer。Therewas，tobesure，inallthescenesabovealludedto，justonemoment——oneparticularmoment——
　　whentheuniversalpeoplefeelsashockandisforthatsecondserious。
　　Butexceptforthatsecondoftime，IdeclareIsawnoseriousnessherebeyondthatofennui。Thechurchbegantofillwithpersonagesofallranksandconditions。First，oppositeourseatscameacompanyoffatgrenadiersoftheNationalGuard，whopresently，atthewordofcommand，puttheirmusketsdownagainstbenchesandwainscots，untilthearrivaloftheprocession。Forsevenhoursthesemenformedtheobjectofthemostanxioussolicitudeofalltheladiesandgentlemenseatedonourbenches:theybegantostamptheirfeet，forthecoldwasatrocious，andwewerefrozenwherewesat。Someofthemfelltoblowingtheirfingers;oneexecutedakindofdance，suchasoneseesoftenhereincoldweather——theindividualjumpsrepeatedlyupononeleg，andkicksouttheotherviolently，meanwhilehishandsareflappingacrosshischest。Somefellowsopenedtheircartouche—boxes，andfromthemdreweatablesofvariouskinds。Youcan'tthinkhowanxiousweweretoknowthequalitiesofthesame。"Tiens，cegrosquimangeunecuissedevolaille！"——"Iladujambon，celui—la。""Ishouldlikesome，too，"
　　growlsanEnglishman，"forIhadn'tamorselofbreakfast，"andsoon。Thisistheway，mydear，thatweseeNapoleonburied。
　　Didyoueverseeachickenescapefromclowninapantomime，andhopoverintothepit，oramongstthefiddlers？andhaveyounotseentheshrieksofenthusiasticlaughterthatthewondrousincidentoccasions？Wehadourchicken，ofcourse:thereneverwasapubliccrowdwithoutone。Apoorunhappywomaninagreasyplaidcloak，withabatteredrose—coloredplushbonnet，wasseentakingherplaceamongthestallsallottedtothegrandees。"Voyezdoncl'Anglaise，"
　　saideverybody，anditwastootrue。YoucouldswearthatthewretchwasanEnglishwoman:abonnetwasnevermadeorwornsoinanyothercountry。Halfanhour'sdelightfulamusementdidthisladygiveusall。Shewaswhiskedfromseattoseatbythehuissiers，andateverychangeofplacewokeapealoflaughter。I
　　wasglad，however，attheendofthedaytoseetheoldpinkbonnetoveraverycomfortableseat，whichsomebodyhadnotclaimedandshehadkept。