Chapter26
Sophiecameatseventodressme:shewasverylongindeedinaccomplishinghertask;solongthatMr。Rochester，grown，Isuppose，impatientofmydelay，sentuptoaskwhyIdidnotcome。Shewasjustfasteningmyveil（theplainsquareofblondafterall）tomyhairwithabrooch;IhurriedfromunderherhandsassoonasIcould。
“Stop！”shecriedinFrench。“Lookatyourselfinthemirror:youhavenottakenonepeep。”
SoIturnedatthedoor:Isawarobedandveiledfigure，sounlikemyusualselfthatitseemedalmosttheimageofastranger。“Jane！”calledavoice，andIhasteneddown。IwasreceivedatthefootofthestairsbyMr。Rochester。
“Lingerer！”hesaid，“mybrainisonfirewithimpatience，andyoutarrysolong！”
Hetookmeintothedining—room，surveyedmekeenlyallover，pronouncedme“fairasalily，andnotonlytheprideofhislife，butthedesireofhiseyes，”andthentellingmehewouldgivemebuttenminutestoeatsomebreakfast，herangthebell。Oneofhislatelyhiredservants，afootman，answeredit。
“IsJohngettingthecarriageready？”
“Yes，sir。”
“Istheluggagebroughtdown？”
“Theyarebringingitdown，sir。”
“Goyoutothechurch:seeifMr。Wood（theclergyman）andtheclerkarethere:returnandtellme。”
Thechurch，asthereaderknows，wasbutjustbeyondthegates;thefootmansoonreturned。
“Mr。Woodisinthevestry，sir，puttingonhissurplice。”
“Andthecarriage？”
“Thehorsesareharnessing。”
“Weshallnotwantittogotochurch;butitmustbereadythemomentwereturn:alltheboxesandluggagearrangedandstrappedon，andthecoachmaninhisseat。”
“Yes，sir。”
“Jane，areyouready？”
Irose。Therewerenogroomsmen，nobridesmaids，norelativestowaitforormarshal:nonebutMr。RochesterandI。Mrs。Fairfaxstoodinthehallaswepassed。Iwouldfainhavespokentoher，butmyhandwasheldbyagraspofiron:IwashurriedalongbyastrideIcouldhardlyfollow;andtolookatMr。Rochester’sfacewastofeelthatnotasecondofdelaywouldbetoleratedforanypurpose。Iwonderwhatotherbridegroomeverlookedashedid—sobentuptoapurpose，sogrimlyresolute:orwho，undersuchsteadfastbrows，everrevealedsuchflamingandflashingeyes。
Iknownotwhetherthedaywasfairorfoul;indescendingthedrive，Igazedneitheronskynorearth:myheartwaswithmyeyes;andbothseemedmigratedintoMr。Rochester’sframe。Iwantedtoseetheinvisiblethingonwhich，aswewentalong，heappearedtofastenaglancefierceandfell。Iwantedtofeelthethoughtswhoseforceheseemedbreastingandresisting。
Atthechurchyardwickethestopped:hediscoveredIwasquiteoutofbreath。“AmIcruelinmylove？”hesaid。“Delayaninstant:leanonme，Jane。”
AndnowIcanrecallthepictureofthegreyoldhouseofGodrisingcalmbeforeme，ofarookwheelingroundthesteeple，ofaruddymorningskybeyond。Iremembersomething，too，ofthegreengrave—mounds;andIhavenotforgotten，either，twofiguresofstrangersstrayingamongstthelowhillocksandreadingthemementoesgravenonthefewmossyhead—stones。Inoticedthem，because，astheysawus，theypassedroundtothebackofthechurch;andIdoubtednottheyweregoingtoenterbytheside—aisledoorandwitnesstheceremony。ByMr。Rochestertheywerenotobserved;hewasearnestlylookingatmyfacefromwhichthebloodhad，Idaresay，momentarilyfled:forIfeltmyforeheaddewy，andmycheeksandlipscold。WhenIrallied，whichIsoondid，hewalkedgentlywithmeupthepathtotheporch。
Weenteredthequietandhumbletemple;thepriestwaitedinhiswhitesurpliceatthelowlyaltar，theclerkbesidehim。Allwasstill:twoshadowsonlymovedinaremotecorner。Myconjecturehadbeencorrect:thestrangershadslippedinbeforeus，andtheynowstoodbythevaultoftheRochesters，theirbackstowardsus，viewingthroughtherailstheoldtime—stainedmarbletomb，whereakneelingangelguardedtheremainsofDamerdeRochester，slainatMarstonMoorinthetimeofthecivilwars，andofElizabeth，hiswife。
Ourplacewastakenatthecommunionrails。Hearingacautiousstepbehindme，Iglancedovermyshoulder:oneofthestrangers—agentleman，evidently—wasadvancingupthechancel。Theservicebegan。Theexplanationoftheintentofmatrimonywasgonethrough;andthentheclergymancameastepfurtherforward，and，bendingslightlytowardsMr。Rochester，wenton。
“Irequireandchargeyouboth（asyewillansweratthedreadfuldayofjudgment，whenthesecretsofallheartsshallbedisclosed），thatifeitherofyouknowanyimpedimentwhyyemaynotlawfullybejoinedtogetherinmatrimony，yedonowconfessit;forbeyewellassuredthatsomanyasarecoupledtogetherotherwisethanGod’sWorddothallow，arenotjoinedtogetherbyGod，neitheristheirmatrimonylawful。”
Hepaused，asthecustomis。Whenisthepauseafterthatsentenceeverbrokenbyreply？Not，perhaps，onceinahundredyears。Andtheclergyman，whohadnotliftedhiseyesfromhisbook，andhadheldhisbreathbutforamoment，wasproceeding:hishandwasalreadystretchedtowardsMr。Rochester，ashislipsunclosedtoask，“Wiltthouhavethiswomanforthyweddedwife？”—whenadistinctandnearvoicesaid—
“Themarriagecannotgoon:Ideclaretheexistenceofanimpediment。”
Theclergymanlookedupatthespeakerandstoodmute;theclerkdidthesame;Mr。Rochestermovedslightly，asifanearthquakehadrolledunderhisfeet:takingafirmerfooting，andnotturninghisheadoreyes，hesaid，“Proceed。”
Profoundsilencefellwhenhehadutteredthatword，withdeepbutlowintonation。PresentlyMr。Woodsaid—
“Icannotproceedwithoutsomeinvestigationintowhathasbeenasserted，andevidenceofitstruthorfalsehood。”
“Theceremonyisquitebrokenoff，”subjoinedthevoicebehindus。“Iaminaconditiontoprovemyallegation:aninsuperableimpedimenttothismarriageexists。”
Mr。Rochesterheard，butheedednot:hestoodstubbornandrigid，makingnomovementbuttopossesshimselfofmyhand。Whatahotandstronggrasphehad！andhowlikequarriedmarblewashispale，firm，massivefrontatthismoment！Howhiseyeshone，stillwatchful，andyetwildbeneath！
Mr。Woodseemedataloss。“Whatisthenatureoftheimpediment？”heasked。“Perhapsitmaybegotover—explainedaway？”
“Hardly，”wastheanswer。“Ihavecalleditinsuperable，andIspeakadvisedly。”
Thespeakercameforwardandleanedontherails。Hecontinued，utteringeachworddistinctly，calmly，steadily，butnotloudly—
“Itsimplyconsistsintheexistenceofapreviousmarriage。Mr。Rochesterhasawifenowliving。”
Mynervesvibratedtothoselow—spokenwordsastheyhadnevervibratedtothunder—mybloodfelttheirsubtleviolenceasithadneverfeltfrostorfire;butIwascollected，andinnodangerofswooning。IlookedatMr。Rochester:Imadehimlookatme。Hiswholefacewascolourlessrock:hiseyewasbothsparkandflint。Hedisavowednothing:heseemedasifhewoulddefyallthings。Withoutspeaking，withoutsmiling，withoutseemingtorecogniseinmeahumanbeing，heonlytwinedmywaistwithhisarmandrivetedmetohisside。
“Whoareyou？”heaskedoftheintruder。
“MynameisBriggs，asolicitorof—Street，London。”
“Andyouwouldthrustonmeawife？”
“Iwouldremindyouofyourlady’sexistence，sir，whichthelawrecognises，ifyoudonot。”
“Favourmewithanaccountofher—withhername，herparentage，herplaceofabode。”
“Certainly。”Mr。Briggscalmlytookapaperfromhispocket，andreadoutinasortofofficial，nasalvoice:—
“‘Iaffirmandcanprovethatonthe20thofOctoberA。D。—（adateoffifteenyearsback），EdwardFairfaxRochester，ofThornfieldHall，inthecountyof—，andofFerndeanManor，in—shire，England，wasmarriedtomysister，BerthaAntoinettaMason，daughterofJonasMason，merchant，andofAntoinettahiswife，aCreole，at—church，SpanishTown，Jamaica。Therecordofthemarriagewillbefoundintheregisterofthatchurch—acopyofitisnowinmypossession。Signed，RichardMason。’”
“That—ifagenuinedocument—mayproveIhavebeenmarried，butitdoesnotprovethatthewomanmentionedthereinasmywifeisstillliving。”
“Shewaslivingthreemonthsago，”returnedthelawyer。
“Howdoyouknow？”
“Ihaveawitnesstothefact，whosetestimonyevenyou，sir，willscarcelycontrovert。”
“Producehim—orgotohell。”
“Iwillproducehimfirst—heisonthespot。Mr。Mason，havethegoodnesstostepforward。”
Mr。Rochester，onhearingthename，sethisteeth;heexperienced，too，asortofstrongconvulsivequiver;neartohimasIwas，Ifeltthespasmodicmovementoffuryordespairrunthroughhisframe。Thesecondstranger，whohadhithertolingeredinthebackground，nowdrewnear;apalefacelookedoverthesolicitor’sshoulder—yes，itwasMasonhimself。Mr。Rochesterturnedandglaredathim。Hiseye，asIhaveoftensaid，wasablackeye:ithadnowatawny，nay，abloodylightinitsgloom;andhisfaceflushed—olivecheekandhuelessforeheadreceivedaglowasfromspreading，ascendingheart—fire:andhestirred，liftedhisstrongarm—hecouldhavestruckMason，dashedhimonthechurch—floor，shockedbyruthlessblowthebreathfromhisbody—butMasonshrankaway，andcriedfaintly，“GoodGod！”ContemptfellcoolonMr。Rochester—hispassiondiedasifablighthadshrivelleditup:heonlyasked—“Whathaveyoutosay？”
AninaudiblereplyescapedMason’swhitelips。
“Thedevilisinitifyoucannotanswerdistinctly。Iagaindemand，whathaveyoutosay？”
“Sir—sir，”interruptedtheclergyman，“donotforgetyouareinasacredplace。”ThenaddressingMason，heinquiredgently，“Areyouaware，sir，whetherornotthisgentleman’swifeisstillliving？”
“Courage，”urgedthelawyer，—“speakout。”
“SheisnowlivingatThornfieldHall，”saidMason，inmorearticulatetones:“IsawhertherelastApril。Iamherbrother。”
“AtThornfieldHall！”ejaculatedtheclergyman。“Impossible！Iamanoldresidentinthisneighbourhood，sir，andIneverheardofaMrs。RochesteratThornfieldHall。”
IsawagrimsmilecontortMr。Rochester’slips，andhemuttered—
“No，byGod！Itookcarethatnoneshouldhearofit—orofherunderthatname。”Hemused—fortenminutesheheldcounselwithhimself:heformedhisresolve，andannouncedit—
“Enough！allshallboltoutatonce，likethebulletfromthebarrel。Wood，closeyourbookandtakeoffyoursurplice;JohnGreen（totheclerk），leavethechurch:therewillbenoweddingto—day。”Themanobeyed。
Mr。Rochestercontinued，hardilyandrecklessly:“Bigamyisanuglyword！—Imeant，however，tobeabigamist;butfatehasout—manoeuvredme，orProvidencehascheckedme，—perhapsthelast。Iamlittlebetterthanadevilatthismoment;and，asmypastortherewouldtellme，deservenodoubtthesternestjudgmentsofGod，eventothequenchlessfireanddeathlessworm。Gentlemen，myplanisbrokenup:—whatthislawyerandhisclientsayistrue:Ihavebeenmarried，andthewomantowhomIwasmarriedlives！YousayyouneverheardofaMrs。Rochesteratthehouseupyonder，Wood;butIdaresayyouhavemanyatimeinclinedyoureartogossipaboutthemysteriouslunatickeptthereunderwatchandward。Somehavewhisperedtoyouthatsheismybastardhalf—sister:some，mycast—offmistress。Inowinformyouthatsheismywife，whomImarriedfifteenyearsago，—BerthaMasonbyname;sisterofthisresolutepersonage，whoisnow，withhisquiveringlimbsandwhitecheeks，showingyouwhatastoutheartmenmaybear。Cheerup，Dick！—neverfearme！—I’dalmostassoonstrikeawomanasyou。BerthaMasonismad;andshecameofamadfamily;idiotsandmaniacsthroughthreegenerations？Hermother，theCreole，wasbothamadwomanandadrunkard！—asIfoundoutafterIhadwedthedaughter:fortheyweresilentonfamilysecretsbefore。Bertha，likeadutifulchild，copiedherparentinbothpoints。Ihadacharmingpartner—pure，wise，modest:youcanfancyIwasahappyman。Iwentthroughrichscenes！Oh！myexperiencehasbeenheavenly，ifyouonlyknewit！ButIoweyounofurtherexplanation。Briggs，Wood，Mason，IinviteyoualltocomeuptothehouseandvisitMrs。Poole’spatient，andmywife！YoushallseewhatsortofabeingIwascheatedintoespousing，andjudgewhetherornotIhadarighttobreakthecompact，andseeksympathywithsomethingatleasthuman。Thisgirl，”hecontinued，lookingatme，“knewnomorethanyou，Wood，ofthedisgustingsecret:shethoughtallwasfairandlegalandneverdreamtshewasgoingtobeentrappedintoafeignedunionwithadefraudedwretch，alreadyboundtoabad，mad，andembrutedpartner！Comeallofyou—follow！”
Stillholdingmefast，heleftthechurch:thethreegentlemencameafter。Atthefrontdoorofthehallwefoundthecarriage。
“Takeitbacktothecoach—house，John，”saidMr。Rochestercoolly;“itwillnotbewantedto—day。”
Atourentrance，Mrs。Fairfax，Adèle，Sophie，Leah，advancedtomeetandgreetus。
“Totheright—about—everysoul！”criedthemaster;“awaywithyourcongratulations！Whowantsthem？NotI！—theyarefifteenyearstoolate！”
Hepassedonandascendedthestairs，stillholdingmyhand，andstillbeckoningthegentlementofollowhim，whichtheydid。Wemountedthefirststaircase，passedupthegallery，proceededtothethirdstorey:thelow，blackdoor，openedbyMr。Rochester’smaster—key，admittedustothetapestriedroom，withitsgreatbedanditspictorialcabinet。
“Youknowthisplace，Mason，”saidourguide;“shebitandstabbedyouhere。”
Heliftedthehangingsfromthewall，uncoveringtheseconddoor:this，too，heopened。Inaroomwithoutawindow，thereburntafireguardedbyahighandstrongfender，andalampsuspendedfromtheceilingbyachain。GracePoolebentoverthefire，apparentlycookingsomethinginasaucepan。Inthedeepshade，atthefartherendoftheroom，afigureranbackwardsandforwards。Whatitwas，whetherbeastorhumanbeing，onecouldnot，atfirstsight，tell:itgrovelled，seemingly，onallfours;itsnatchedandgrowledlikesomestrangewildanimal:butitwascoveredwithclothing，andaquantityofdark，grizzledhair，wildasamane，hiditsheadandface。
“Good—morrow，Mrs。Poole！”saidMr。Rochester。“Howareyou？andhowisyourchargeto—day？”
“We’retolerable，sir，Ithankyou，”repliedGrace，liftingtheboilingmesscarefullyontothehob:“rathersnappish，butnot‘rageous。”
Afiercecryseemedtogivethelietoherfavourablereport:theclothedhyenaroseup，andstoodtallonitshind—feet。
“Ah！sir，sheseesyou！”exclaimedGrace:“you’dbetternotstay。”
“Onlyafewmoments，Grace:youmustallowmeafewmoments。”
“Takecarethen，sir！—forGod’ssake，takecare！”
Themaniacbellowed:shepartedhershaggylocksfromhervisage，andgazedwildlyathervisitors。Irecognisedwellthatpurpleface，—thosebloatedfeatures。Mrs。Pooleadvanced。
“Keepoutoftheway，”saidMr。Rochester，thrustingheraside:“shehasnoknifenow，Isuppose，andI’monmyguard。”
“Oneneverknowswhatshehas，sir:sheissocunning:itisnotinmortaldiscretiontofathomhercraft。”
“Wehadbetterleaveher，”whisperedMason。
“Gotothedevil！”washisbrother—in—law’srecommendation。
“‘Ware！”criedGrace。Thethreegentlemenretreatedsimultaneously。Mr。Rochesterflungmebehindhim:thelunaticsprangandgrappledhisthroatviciously，andlaidherteethtohischeek:theystruggled。Shewasabigwoman，instaturealmostequallingherhusband，andcorpulentbesides:sheshowedvirileforceinthecontest—morethanonceshealmostthrottledhim，athleticashewas。Hecouldhavesettledherwithawell—plantedblow;buthewouldnotstrike:hewouldonlywrestle。Atlasthemasteredherarms;GracePoolegavehimacord，andhepinionedthembehindher:withmorerope，whichwasathand，heboundhertoachair。Theoperationwasperformedamidstthefiercestyellsandthemostconvulsiveplunges。Mr。Rochesterthenturnedtothespectators:helookedatthemwithasmilebothacridanddesolate。
“Thatismywife，”saidhe。“SuchisthesoleconjugalembraceIamevertoknow—sucharetheendearmentswhicharetosolacemyleisurehours！AndTHISiswhatIwishedtohave”（layinghishandonmyshoulder）:“thisyounggirl，whostandssograveandquietatthemouthofhell，lookingcollectedlyatthegambolsofademon，Iwantedherjustasachangeafterthatfierceragout。WoodandBriggs，lookatthedifference！Comparethesecleareyeswiththeredballsyonder—thisfacewiththatmask—thisformwiththatbulk;thenjudgeme，priestofthegospelandmanofthelaw，andrememberwithwhatjudgmentyejudgeyeshallbejudged！Offwithyounow。Imustshutupmyprize。”
Weallwithdrew。Mr。Rochesterstayedamomentbehindus，togivesomefurtherordertoGracePoole。Thesolicitoraddressedmeashedescendedthestair。
“You，madam，”saidhe，“areclearedfromallblame:yourunclewillbegladtohearit—if，indeed，heshouldbestillliving—whenMr。MasonreturnstoMadeira。”
“Myuncle！Whatofhim？Doyouknowhim？”
“Mr。Masondoes。Mr。EyrehasbeentheFunchalcorrespondentofhishouseforsomeyears。WhenyourunclereceivedyourletterintimatingthecontemplatedunionbetweenyourselfandMr。Rochester，Mr。Mason，whowasstayingatMadeiratorecruithishealth，onhiswaybacktoJamaica，happenedtobewithhim。Mr。Eyrementionedtheintelligence;forheknewthatmyclientherewasacquaintedwithagentlemanofthenameofRochester。Mr。Mason，astonishedanddistressedasyoumaysuppose，revealedtherealstateofmatters。Youruncle，Iamsorrytosay，isnowonasickbed;fromwhich，consideringthenatureofhisdisease—decline—andthestageithasreached，itisunlikelyhewilleverrise。HecouldnotthenhastentoEnglandhimself，toextricateyoufromthesnareintowhichyouhadfallen，butheimploredMr。Masontolosenotimeintakingstepstopreventthefalsemarriage。Hereferredhimtomeforassistance。Iusedalldespatch，andamthankfulIwasnottoolate:asyou，doubtless，mustbealso。WereInotmorallycertainthatyourunclewillbedeadereyoureachMadeira，IwouldadviseyoutoaccompanyMr。Masonback;butasitis，IthinkyouhadbetterremaininEnglandtillyoucanhearfurther，eitherfromorofMr。Eyre。Haveweanythingelsetostayfor？”heinquiredofMr。Mason。
“No，no—letusbegone，”wastheanxiousreply;andwithoutwaitingtotakeleaveofMr。Rochester，theymadetheirexitatthehalldoor。Theclergymanstayedtoexchangeafewsentences，eitherofadmonitionorreproof，withhishaughtyparishioner;thisdutydone，hetoodeparted。
IheardhimgoasIstoodatthehalf—opendoorofmyownroom，towhichIhadnowwithdrawn。Thehousecleared，Ishutmyselfin，fastenedtheboltthatnonemightintrude，andproceeded—nottoweep，nottomourn，Iwasyettoocalmforthat，but—mechanicallytotakeofftheweddingdress，andreplaceitbythestuffgownIhadwornyesterday，asIthought，forthelasttime。Ithensatdown:Ifeltweakandtired。Ileanedmyarmsonatable，andmyheaddroppedonthem。AndnowIthought:tillnowIhadonlyheard，seen，moved—followedupanddownwhereIwasledordragged—watchedeventrushonevent，disclosureopenbeyonddisclosure:butnow，Ithought。
Themorninghadbeenaquietmorningenough—allexceptthebriefscenewiththelunatic:thetransactioninthechurchhadnotbeennoisy;therewasnoexplosionofpassion，noloudaltercation，nodispute，nodefianceorchallenge，notears，nosobs:afewwordshadbeenspoken，acalmlypronouncedobjectiontothemarriagemade;somestern，shortquestionsputbyMr。Rochester;answers，explanationsgiven，evidenceadduced;anopenadmissionofthetruthhadbeenutteredbymymaster;thenthelivingproofhadbeenseen;theintrudersweregone，andallwasover。
Iwasinmyownroomasusual—justmyself，withoutobviouschange:nothinghadsmittenme，orscathedme，ormaimedme。AndyetwherewastheJaneEyreofyesterday？—wherewasherlife？—wherewereherprospects？
JaneEyre，whohadbeenanardent，expectantwoman—almostabride，wasacold，solitarygirlagain:herlifewaspale;herprospectsweredesolate。AChristmasfrosthadcomeatmidsummer;awhiteDecemberstormhadwhirledoverJune;iceglazedtheripeapples，driftscrushedtheblowingroses;onhayfieldandcornfieldlayafrozenshroud:laneswhichlastnightblushedfullofflowers，to—daywerepathlesswithuntroddensnow;andthewoods，whichtwelvehourssincewavedleafyandflagrantasgrovesbetweenthetropics，nowspread，waste，wild，andwhiteaspine—forestsinwintryNorway。Myhopeswerealldead—struckwithasubtledoom，suchas，inonenight，fellonallthefirst—borninthelandofEgypt。Ilookedonmycherishedwishes，yesterdaysobloomingandglowing;theylaystark，chill，lividcorpsesthatcouldneverrevive。Ilookedatmylove:thatfeelingwhichwasmymaster’s—whichhehadcreated;itshiveredinmyheart，likeasufferingchildinacoldcradle;sicknessandanguishhadseizedit;itcouldnotseekMr。Rochester’sarms—itcouldnotderivewarmthfromhisbreast。Oh，nevermorecoulditturntohim;forfaithwasblighted—confidencedestroyed！Mr。Rochesterwasnottomewhathehadbeen;forhewasnotwhatIhadthoughthim。Iwouldnotascribevicetohim;Iwouldnotsayhehadbetrayedme;buttheattributeofstainlesstruthwasgonefromhisidea，andfromhispresenceImustgo:THATIperceivedwell。When—how—whither，Icouldnotyetdiscern;buthehimself，Idoubtednot，wouldhurrymefromThornfield。Realaffection，itseemed，hecouldnothaveforme;ithadbeenonlyfitfulpassion:thatwasbalked;hewouldwantmenomore。Ishouldfeareventocrosshispathnow:myviewmustbehatefultohim。Oh，howblindhadbeenmyeyes！Howweakmyconduct！
Myeyeswerecoveredandclosed:eddyingdarknessseemedtoswimroundme，andreflectioncameinasblackandconfusedaflow。Self—abandoned，relaxed，andeffortless，Iseemedtohavelaidmedowninthedried—upbedofagreatriver;Iheardafloodloosenedinremotemountains，andfeltthetorrentcome:toriseIhadnowill，tofleeIhadnostrength。Ilayfaint，longingtobedead。Oneideaonlystillthrobbedlife—likewithinme—aremembranceofGod:itbegotanunutteredprayer:thesewordswentwanderingupanddowninmyraylessmind，assomethingthatshouldbewhispered，butnoenergywasfoundtoexpressthem—
“Benotfarfromme，fortroubleisnear:thereisnonetohelp。”
Itwasnear:andasIhadliftednopetitiontoHeaventoavertit—asIhadneitherjoinedmyhands，norbentmyknees，normovedmylips—itcame:infullheavyswingthetorrentpouredoverme。Thewholeconsciousnessofmylifelorn，mylovelost，myhopequenched，myfaithdeath—struck，swayedfullandmightyabovemeinonesullenmass。Thatbitterhourcannotbedescribed:intruth，“thewaterscameintomysoul;Isankindeepmire:Ifeltnostanding;Icameintodeepwaters;thefloodsoverflowedme。”
Chapter27
SometimeintheafternoonIraisedmyhead，andlookingroundandseeingthewesternsungildingthesignofitsdeclineonthewall，Iasked，“WhatamItodo？”
Buttheanswermymindgave—“LeaveThornfieldatonce”—wassoprompt，sodread，thatIstoppedmyears。IsaidIcouldnotbearsuchwordsnow。“ThatIamnotEdwardRochester’sbrideistheleastpartofmywoe，”Ialleged:“thatIhavewakenedoutofmostgloriousdreams，andfoundthemallvoidandvain，isahorrorIcouldbearandmaster;butthatImustleavehimdecidedly，instantly，entirely，isintolerable。Icannotdoit。”
But，then，avoicewithinmeaverredthatIcoulddoitandforetoldthatIshoulddoit。Iwrestledwithmyownresolution:IwantedtobeweakthatImightavoidtheawfulpassageoffurthersufferingIsawlaidoutforme;andConscience，turnedtyrant，heldPassionbythethroat，toldhertauntingly，shehadyetbutdippedherdaintyfootintheslough，andsworethatwiththatarmofironhewouldthrustherdowntounsoundeddepthsofagony。
“Letmebetornaway，”thenIcried。“Letanotherhelpme！”
“No;youshalltearyourselfaway，noneshallhelpyou:youshallyourselfpluckoutyourrighteye;yourselfcutoffyourrighthand:yourheartshallbethevictim，andyouthepriesttotransfixit。”
Iroseupsuddenly，terror—struckatthesolitudewhichsoruthlessajudgehaunted，—atthesilencewhichsoawfulavoicefilled。MyheadswamasIstooderect。IperceivedthatIwassickeningfromexcitementandinanition;neithermeatnordrinkhadpassedmylipsthatday，forIhadtakennobreakfast。And，withastrangepang，Inowreflectedthat，longasIhadbeenshutuphere，nomessagehadbeensenttoaskhowIwas，ortoinvitemetocomedown:notevenlittleAdèlehadtappedatthedoor;notevenMrs。Fairfaxhadsoughtme。“Friendsalwaysforgetthosewhomfortuneforsakes，”Imurmured，asIundrewtheboltandpassedout。Istumbledoveranobstacle:myheadwasstilldizzy，mysightwasdim，andmylimbswerefeeble。Icouldnotsoonrecovermyself。Ifell，butnotontotheground:anoutstretchedarmcaughtme。Ilookedup—IwassupportedbyMr。Rochester，whosatinachairacrossmychamberthreshold。
“Youcomeoutatlast，”hesaid。“Well，Ihavebeenwaitingforyoulong，andlistening:yetnotonemovementhaveIheard，noronesob:fiveminutesmoreofthatdeath—likehush，andIshouldhaveforcedthelocklikeaburglar。Soyoushunme？—youshutyourselfupandgrievealone！Iwouldratheryouhadcomeandupbraidedmewithvehemence。Youarepassionate。Iexpectedasceneofsomekind。Iwaspreparedforthehotrainoftears;onlyIwantedthemtobeshedonmybreast:nowasenselessfloorhasreceivedthem，oryourdrenchedhandkerchief。ButIerr:youhavenotweptatall！Iseeawhitecheekandafadedeye，butnotraceoftears。Isuppose，then，yourhearthasbeenweepingblood？”
“Well，Jane！notawordofreproach？Nothingbitter—nothingpoignant？Nothingtocutafeelingorstingapassion？YousitquietlywhereIhaveplacedyou，andregardmewithaweary，passivelook。”
“Jane，Inevermeanttowoundyouthus。Ifthemanwhohadbutonelittleewelambthatwasdeartohimasadaughter，thatateofhisbreadanddrankofhiscup，andlayinhisbosom，hadbysomemistakeslaughtereditattheshambles，hewouldnothaveruedhisbloodyblundermorethanInowruemine。Willyoueverforgiveme？”
Reader，Iforgavehimatthemomentandonthespot。Therewassuchdeepremorseinhiseye，suchtruepityinhistone，suchmanlyenergyinhismanner;andbesides，therewassuchunchangedloveinhiswholelookandmien—Iforgavehimall:yetnotinwords，notoutwardly;onlyatmyheart’score。
“YouknowIamascoundrel，Jane？”erelongheinquiredwistfully—wondering，Isuppose，atmycontinuedsilenceandtameness，theresultratherofweaknessthanofwill。
“Yes，sir。”
“Thentellmesoroundlyandsharply—don’tspareme。”
“Icannot:Iamtiredandsick。Iwantsomewater。”Heheavedasortofshudderingsigh，andtakingmeinhisarms，carriedmedownstairs。AtfirstIdidnotknowtowhatroomhehadborneme;allwascloudytomyglazedsight:presentlyIfelttherevivingwarmthofafire;for，summerasitwas，Ihadbecomeicycoldinmychamber。Heputwinetomylips;Itasteditandrevived;thenIatesomethingheofferedme，andwassoonmyself。Iwasinthelibrary—sittinginhischair—hewasquitenear。“IfIcouldgooutoflifenow，withouttoosharpapang，itwouldbewellforme，”Ithought;“thenIshouldnothavetomaketheeffortofcrackingmyheart—stringsinrendingthemfromamongMr。Rochester’s。Imustleavehim，itappears。Idonotwanttoleavehim—Icannotleavehim。”
“Howareyounow，Jane？”
“Muchbetter，sir;Ishallbewellsoon。”
“Tastethewineagain，Jane。”
Iobeyedhim;thenheputtheglassonthetable，stoodbeforeme，andlookedatmeattentively。Suddenlyheturnedaway，withaninarticulateexclamation，fullofpassionateemotionofsomekind;hewalkedfastthroughtheroomandcameback;hestoopedtowardsmeasiftokissme;butIrememberedcaresseswerenowforbidden。Iturnedmyfaceawayandputhisaside。
“What！—Howisthis？”heexclaimedhastily。“Oh，Iknow！youwon’tkissthehusbandofBerthaMason？Youconsidermyarmsfilledandmyembracesappropriated？”
“Atanyrate，thereisneitherroomnorclaimforme，sir。”
“Why，Jane？Iwillspareyouthetroubleofmuchtalking;Iwillanswerforyou—BecauseIhaveawifealready，youwouldreply。—Iguessrightly？”
“Yes。”
“Ifyouthinkso，youmusthaveastrangeopinionofme;youmustregardmeasaplottingprofligate—abaseandlowrakewhohasbeensimulatingdisinterestedloveinordertodrawyouintoasnaredeliberatelylaid，andstripyouofhonourandrobyouofself—respect。Whatdoyousaytothat？Iseeyoucansaynothinginthefirstplace，youarefaintstill，andhaveenoughtodotodrawyourbreath;inthesecondplace，youcannotyetaccustomyourselftoaccuseandrevileme，andbesides，theflood—gatesoftearsareopened，andtheywouldrushoutifyouspokemuch;andyouhavenodesiretoexpostulate，toupbraid，tomakeascene:youarethinkinghowtoact—talkingyouconsiderisofnouse。Iknowyou—Iamonmyguard。”
“Sir，Idonotwishtoactagainstyou，”Isaid;andmyunsteadyvoicewarnedmetocurtailmysentence。
“Notinyoursenseoftheword，butinmineyouareschemingtodestroyme。YouhaveasgoodassaidthatIamamarriedman—asamarriedmanyouwillshunme，keepoutofmyway:justnowyouhaverefusedtokissme。Youintendtomakeyourselfacompletestrangertome:toliveunderthisroofonlyasAdèle’sgoverness;ifeverIsayafriendlywordtoyou，ifeverafriendlyfeelinginclinesyouagaintome，youwillsay，—‘Thatmanhadnearlymademehismistress:Imustbeiceandrocktohim;’andiceandrockyouwillaccordinglybecome。”