Chapter1
　　SistersURSULAANDGUDRUNBrangwensatonemorninginthewindow—bayoftheirfather'shouseinBeldover，workingandtalking。Ursulawasstitchingapieceofbrightly—colouredembroidery，andGudrunwasdrawinguponaboardwhichsheheldonherknee。
　　Theyweremostlysilent，talkingastheirthoughtsstrayedthroughtheirminds。
　　`Ursula，'saidGudrun，`don'tyoureallywanttogetmarried？'
　　Ursulalaidherembroideryinherlapandlookedup。Herfacewascalmandconsiderate。
　　`Idon'tknow，'shereplied。`Itdependshowyoumean。'
　　Gudrunwasslightlytakenaback。Shewatchedhersisterforsomemoments。
　　`Well，'shesaid，ironically，`itusuallymeansonething！Butdon'tyouthinkanyhow，you'dbe——'shedarkenedslightly——`inabetterpositionthanyouareinnow。'
　　AshadowcameoverUrsula'sface。
　　`Imight，'shesaid。`ButI'mnotsure。'
　　AgainGudrunpaused，slightlyirritated。Shewantedtobequitedefinite。
　　`Youdon'tthinkoneneedstheexperienceofhavingbeenmarried？'
　　sheasked。
　　`Doyouthinkitneedbeanexperience？'repliedUrsula。
　　`Boundtobe，insomewayorother，'saidGudrun，coolly。`Possiblyundesirable，butboundtobeanexperienceofsomesort。'
　　`Notreally，'saidUrsula。`Morelikelytobetheendofexperience。'
　　Gudrunsatverystill，toattendtothis。
　　`Ofcourse，'shesaid，`there'sthattoconsider。'Thisbroughttheconversationtoaclose。Gudrun，almostangrily，tookupherrubberandbegantoruboutpartofherdrawing。Ursulastitchedabsorbedly。
　　`Youwouldn'tconsideragoodoffer？'askedGudrun。
　　`IthinkI'verejectedseveral，'saidUrsula。
　　`Really！'Gudrunflusheddark——`Butanythingreallyworthwhile？
　　Haveyoureally？'
　　`Athousandayear，andanawfullyniceman。Ilikedhimawfully，'saidUrsula。
　　`Really！Butweren'tyoufearfullytempted？'
　　`Intheabstractbutnotintheconcrete，'saidUrsula。`Whenitcomestothepoint，oneisn'teventempted——oh，ifIweretempted，I'dmarrylikeashot。I'monlytemptednotto。'Thefacesofbothsisterssuddenlylitupwithamusement。
　　`Isn'titanamazingthing，'criedGudrun，`howstrongthetemptationis，notto！'Theybothlaughed，lookingateachother。Intheirheartstheywerefrightened。
　　Therewasalongpause，whilstUrsulastitchedandGudrunwentonwithhersketch。Thesisterswerewomen，Ursulatwenty—six，andGudruntwenty—five。
　　Butbothhadtheremote，virginlookofmoderngirls，sistersofArtemisratherthanofHebe。Gudrunwasverybeautiful，passive，soft—skinned，soft—limbed。Sheworeadressofdark—bluesilkystuff，withruchesofblueandgreenlinenlaceintheneckandsleeves;andshehademerald—greenstockings。HerlookofconfidenceanddiffidencecontrastedwithUrsula'ssensitiveexpectancy。Theprovincialpeople，intimidatedbyGudrun'sperfectsang—froidandexclusivebarenessofmanner，saidofher:`Sheisasmartwoman。'ShehadjustcomebackfromLondon，whereshehadspentseveralyears，workingatanart—school，asastudent，andlivingastudiolife。
　　`Iwashopingnowforamantocomealong，'Gudrunsaid，suddenlycatchingherunderlipbetweenherteeth，andmakingastrangegrimace，halfslysmiling，halfanguish。Ursulawasafraid。
　　`Soyouhavecomehome，expectinghimhere？'shelaughed。
　　`Ohmydear，'criedGudrun，strident，`Iwouldn'tgooutofmywaytolookforhim。Butiftheredidhappentocomealongahighlyattractiveindividualofsufficientmeans——well——'shetailedoffironically。ThenshelookedsearchinglyatUrsula，asiftoprobeher。`Don'tyoufindyourselfgettingbored？'sheaskedofhersister。`Don'tyoufind，thatthingsfailtomaterialise？Nothingmaterialises！Everythingwithersinthebud。'
　　`Whatwithersinthebud？'askedUrsula。
　　`Oh，everything——oneself——thingsingeneral。'Therewasapause，whilsteachsistervaguelyconsideredherfate。
　　`Itdoesfrightenone，'saidUrsula，andagaintherewasapause。`Butdoyouhopetogetanywherebyjustmarrying？'
　　`Itseemstobetheinevitablenextstep，'saidGudrun。Ursulaponderedthis，withalittlebitterness。Shewasaclassmistressherself，inWilleyGreenGrammarSchool，asshehadbeenforsomeyears。
　　`Iknow，'shesaid，`itseemslikethatwhenonethinksintheabstract。
　　Butreallyimagineit:imagineanymanoneknows，imaginehimcominghometooneeveryevening，andsaying"Hello，"andgivingoneakiss——'
　　Therewasablankpause。
　　`Yes，'saidGudrun，inanarrowedvoice。`It'sjustimpossible。Themanmakesitimpossible。'
　　`Ofcoursethere'schildren——'saidUrsuladoubtfully。
　　Gudrun'sfacehardened。
　　`Doyoureallywantchildren，Ursula？'sheaskedcoldly。Adazzled，baffledlookcameonUrsula'sface。
　　`Onefeelsitisstillbeyondone，'shesaid。
　　`Doyoufeellikethat？'askedGudrun。`Igetnofeelingwhateverfromthethoughtofbearingchildren。'
　　GudrunlookedatUrsulawithamasklike，expressionlessface。Ursulaknittedherbrows。
　　`Perhapsitisn'tgenuine，'shefaltered。`Perhapsonedoesn'treallywantthem，inone'ssoul——onlysuperficially。'AhardnesscameoverGudrun'sface。Shedidnotwanttobetoodefinite。
　　`Whenonethinksofotherpeople'schildren——'saidUrsula。
　　AgainGudrunlookedathersister，almosthostile。
　　`Exactly，'shesaid，toclosetheconversation。
　　Thetwosistersworkedoninsilence，Ursulahavingalwaysthatstrangebrightnessofanessentialflamethatiscaught，meshed，contravened。Shelivedagooddealbyherself，toherself，working，passingonfromdaytoday，andalwaysthinking，tryingtolayholdonlife，tograspitinherownunderstanding。Heractivelivingwassuspended，butunderneath，inthedarkness，somethingwascomingtopass。Ifonlyshecouldbreakthroughthelastinteguments！Sheseemedtotryandputherhandsout，likeaninfantinthewomb，andshecouldnot，notyet。Stillshehadastrangeprescience，anintimationofsomethingyettocome。
　　Shelaiddownherworkandlookedathersister。ShethoughtGudrunsocharming，soinfinitelycharming，inhersoftnessandherfine，exquisiterichnessoftextureanddelicacyofline。Therewasacertainplayfulnessabouthertoo，suchapiquancyorironicsuggestion，suchanuntouchedreserve。Ursulaadmiredherwithallhersoul。
　　`Whydidyoucomehome，Prune？'sheasked。
　　Gudrunknewshewasbeingadmired。ShesatbackfromherdrawingandlookedatUrsula，fromunderherfinely—curvedlashes。
　　`WhydidIcomeback，Ursula？'sherepeated。`Ihaveaskedmyselfathousandtimes。'
　　`Anddon'tyouknow？'
　　`Yes，IthinkIdo。Ithinkmycomingbackhomewasjustreculerpourmieuxsauter。'
　　Andshelookedwithalong，slowlookofknowledgeatUrsula。
　　`Iknow！'criedUrsula，lookingslightlydazzledandfalsified，andasifshedidnotknow。`Butwherecanonejumpto？'
　　`Oh，itdoesn'tmatter，'saidGudrun，somewhatsuperbly。`Ifonejumpsovertheedge，oneisboundtolandsomewhere。'
　　`Butisn'titveryrisky？'askedUrsula。
　　AslowmockingsmiledawnedonGudrun'sface。
　　`Ah！'shesaidlaughing。`Whatisitallbutwords！'Andsoagainsheclosedtheconversation。ButUrsulawasstillbrooding。
　　`Andhowdoyoufindhome，nowyouhavecomebacktoit？'sheasked。
　　Gudrunpausedforsomemoments，coldly，beforeanswering。Then，inacoldtruthfulvoice，shesaid:
　　`Ifindmyselfcompletelyoutofit。'
　　`Andfather？'
　　GudrunlookedatUrsula，almostwithresentment，asifbroughttobay。
　　`Ihaven'tthoughtabouthim:I'verefrained，'shesaidcoldly。
　　`Yes，'waveredUrsula;andtheconversationwasreallyatanend。Thesistersfoundthemselvesconfrontedbyavoid，aterrifyingchasm，asiftheyhadlookedovertheedge。
　　Theyworkedoninsilenceforsometime，Gudrun'scheekwasflushedwithrepressedemotion。Sheresenteditshavingbeencalledintobeing。
　　`Shallwegooutandlookatthatwedding？'sheaskedatlength，inavoicethatwastoocasual。
　　`Yes！'criedUrsula，tooeagerly，throwingasidehersewingandleapingup，asiftoescapesomething，thusbetrayingthetensionofthesituationandcausingafrictionofdisliketogooverGudrun'snerves。
　　Asshewentupstairs，Ursulawasawareofthehouse，ofherhomeroundabouther。Andsheloathedit，thesordid，too—familiarplace！Shewasafraidatthedepthofherfeelingagainstthehome，themilieu，thewholeatmosphereandconditionofthisobsoletelife。Herfeelingfrightenedher。
　　ThetwogirlsweresoonwalkingswiftlydownthemainroadofBeldover，awidestreet，partshops，partdwelling—houses，utterlyformlessandsordid，withoutpoverty。Gudrun，newfromherlifeinChelseaandSussex，shrankcruellyfromthisamorphousuglinessofasmallcollierytownintheMidlands。
　　Yetforwardshewent，throughthewholesordidgamutofpettiness，thelongamorphous，grittystreet。Shewasexposedtoeverystare，shepassedonthroughastretchoftorment。Itwasstrangethatsheshouldhavechosentocomebackandtestthefulleffectofthisshapeless，barrenuglinessuponherself。Whyhadshewantedtosubmitherselftoit，didshestillwanttosubmitherselftoit，theinsufferabletortureoftheseugly，meaninglesspeople，thisdefacedcountryside？Shefeltlikeabeetletoilinginthedust。Shewasfilledwithrepulsion。
　　Theyturnedoffthemainroad，pastablackpatchofcommon—garden，wheresootycabbagestumpsstoodshameless。Noonethoughttobeashamed。
　　Noonewasashamedofitall。
　　`Itislikeacountryinanunderworld，'saidGudrun。`Thecolliersbringitabove—groundwiththem，shovelitup。Ursula，it'smarvellous，it'sreallymarvellous——it'sreallywonderful，anotherworld。Thepeopleareallghouls，andeverythingisghostly。Everythingisaghoulishreplicaoftherealworld，areplica，aghoul，allsoiled，everythingsordid。It'slikebeingmad，Ursula。'
　　Thesisterswerecrossingablackpaththroughadark，soiledfield。
　　Ontheleftwasalargelandscape，avalleywithcollieries，andoppositehillswithcornfieldsandwoods，allblackenedwithdistance，asifseenthroughaveilofcrape。Whiteandblacksmokeroseupinsteadycolumns，magicwithinthedarkair。Nearathandcamethelongrowsofdwellings，approachingcurvedupthehill—slope，instraightlinesalongthebrowofthehill。Theywereofdarkenedredbrick，brittle，withdarkslateroofs。Thepathonwhichthesisterswalkedwasblack，trodden—inbythefeetoftherecurrentcolliers，andboundedfromthefieldbyironfences;
　　thestilethatledagainintotheroadwasrubbedshinybythemoleskinsofthepassingminers。Nowthetwogirlsweregoingbetweensomerowsofdwellings，ofthepoorersort。Women，theirarmsfoldedovertheircoarseaprons，standinggossipingattheendoftheirblock，staredaftertheBrangwensisterswiththatlong，unwearyingstareofaborigines;childrencalledoutnames。
　　Gudrunwentonherwayhalfdazed。Ifthiswerehumanlife，ifthesewerehumanbeings，livinginacompleteworld，thenwhatwasherownworld，outside？Shewasawareofhergrass—greenstockings，herlargegrass—greenvelourhat，herfullsoftcoat，ofastrongbluecolour。Andshefeltasifsheweretreadingintheair，quiteunstable，herheartwascontracted，asifatanyminuteshemightbeprecipitatedtotheground。Shewasafraid。
　　SheclungtoUrsula，who，throughlongusagewasinuredtothisviolationofadark，uncreated，hostileworld。Butallthetimeherheartwascrying，asifinthemidstofsomeordeal:`Iwanttogoback，Iwanttogoaway，Iwantnottoknowit，nottoknowthatthisexists。'Yetshemustgoforward。
　　Ursulacouldfeelhersuffering。
　　`Youhatethis，don'tyou？'sheasked。
　　`Itbewildersme，'stammeredGudrun。
　　`Youwon'tstaylong，'repliedUrsula。
　　AndGudrunwentalong，graspingatrelease。
　　Theydrewawayfromthecollieryregion，overthecurveofthehill，intothepurercountryoftheotherside，towardsWilleyGreen。Stillthefaintglamourofblacknesspersistedoverthefieldsandthewoodedhills，andseemeddarklytogleamintheair。Itwasaspringday，chill，withsnatchesofsunshine。Yellowcelandinesshowedoutfromthehedge—bottoms，andinthecottagegardensofWilleyGreen，currant—busheswerebreakingintoleaf，andlittleflowerswerecomingwhiteonthegreyalyssumthathungoverthestonewalls。
　　Turning，theypasseddownthehigh—road，thatwentbetweenhighbankstowardsthechurch。There，inthelowestbendoftheroad，lowunderthetrees，stoodalittlegroupofexpectantpeople，waitingtoseethewedding。
　　Thedaughterofthechiefmine—ownerofthedistrict，ThomasCrich，wasgettingmarriedtoanavalofficer。
　　`Letusgoback，'saidGudrun，swervingaway。`Thereareallthosepeople。'
　　Andshehungwaveringintheroad。
　　`Nevermindthem，'saidUrsula，`they'reallright。Theyallknowme，theydon'tmatter。'
　　`Butmustwegothroughthem？'askedGudrun。
　　`They'requiteallright，really，'saidUrsula，goingforward。Andtogetherthetwosistersapproachedthegroupofuneasy，watchfulcommonpeople。
　　Theywerechieflywomen，colliers'wivesofthemoreshiftlesssort。Theyhadwatchful，underworldfaces。
　　Thetwosistersheldthemselvestense，andwentstraighttowardsthegate。Thewomenmadewayforthem，butbarelysufficient，asifgrudgingtoyieldground。Thesisterspassedinsilencethroughthestonegatewayandupthesteps，ontheredcarpet，apolicemanestimatingtheirprogress。
　　`Whatpricethestockings！'saidavoiceatthebackofGudrun。Asuddenfierceangersweptoverthegirl，violentandmurderous。Shewouldhavelikedthemallannihilated，clearedaway，sothattheworldwasleftclearforher。Howshehatedwalkingupthechurchyardpath，alongtheredcarpet，continuinginmotion，intheirsight。
　　`Iwon'tgointothechurch，'shesaidsuddenly，withsuchfinaldecisionthatUrsulaimmediatelyhalted，turnedround，andbranchedoffupasmallsidepathwhichledtothelittleprivategateoftheGrammarSchool，whosegroundsadjoinedthoseofthechurch。
　　Justinsidethegateoftheschoolshrubbery，outsidethechurchyard，Ursulasatdownforamomentonthelowstonewallunderthelaurelbushes，torest。Behindher，thelargeredbuildingoftheschoolroseuppeacefully，thewindowsallopenfortheholiday。Overtheshrubs，beforeher，werethepaleroofsandtoweroftheoldchurch。Thesisterswerehiddenbythefoliage。
　　Gudrunsatdowninsilence。Hermouthwasshutclose，herfaceaverted。
　　Shewasregrettingbitterlythatshehadevercomeback。Ursulalookedather，andthoughthowamazinglybeautifulshewas，flushedwithdiscomfiture。
　　ButshecausedaconstraintoverUrsula'snature，acertainweariness。
　　Ursulawishedtobealone，freedfromthetightness，theenclosureofGudrun'spresence。
　　`Arewegoingtostayhere？'askedGudrun。
　　`Iwasonlyrestingaminute，'saidUrsula，gettingupasifrebuked。
　　`Wewillstandinthecornerbythefives—court，weshallseeeverythingfromthere。'
　　Forthemoment，thesunshinefellbrightlyintothechurchyard，therewasavaguescentofsapandofspring，perhapsofvioletsfromoffthegraves。Somewhitedaisieswereout，brightasangels。Intheair，theunfoldingleavesofacopper—beechwereblood—red。
　　Punctuallyateleveno'clock，thecarriagesbegantoarrive。Therewasastirinthecrowdatthegate，aconcentrationasacarriagedroveup，weddingguestsweremountingupthestepsandpassingalongtheredcarpettothechurch。Theywereallgayandexcitedbecausethesunwasshining。
　　Gudrunwatchedthemclosely，withobjectivecuriosity。Shesaweachoneasacompletefigure，likeacharacterinabook，orasubjectinapicture，oramarionetteinatheatre，afinishedcreation。Shelovedtorecognisetheirvariouscharacteristics，toplacethemintheirtruelight，givethemtheirownsurroundings，settlethemforeverastheypassedbeforeheralongthepathtothechurch。Sheknewthem，theywerefinished，sealedandstampedandfinishedwith，forher。Therewasnonethathadanythingunknown，unresolved，untiltheCrichesthemselvesbegantoappear。Thenherinterestwaspiqued。Herewassomethingnotquitesopreconcluded。
　　Therecamethemother，MrsCrich，withhereldestsonGerald。Shewasaqueerunkemptfigure，inspiteoftheattemptsthathadobviouslybeenmadetobringherintolinefortheday。Herfacewaspale，yellowish，withaclear，transparentskin，sheleanedforwardrather，herfeatureswerestronglymarked，handsome，withatense，unseeing，predativelook。
　　Hercolourlesshairwasuntidy，wispsfloatingdownontohersaccoatofdarkbluesilk，fromunderherbluesilkhat。Shelookedlikeawomanwithamonomania，furtivealmost，butheavilyproud。
　　Hersonwasofafair，sun—tannedtype，ratherabovemiddleheight，well—made，andalmostexaggeratedlywell—dressed。Butabouthimalsowasthestrange，guardedlook，theunconsciousglisten，asifhedidnotbelongtothesamecreationasthepeopleabouthim。Gudrunlightedonhimatonce。Therewassomethingnorthernabouthimthatmagnetisedher。Inhisclearnorthernfleshandhisfairhairwasaglistenlikesunshinerefractedthroughcrystalsofice。Andhelookedsonew，unbroached，pureasanarcticthing。Perhapshewasthirtyyearsold，perhapsmore。Hisgleamingbeauty，maleness，likeayoung，good—humoured，smilingwolf，didnotblindhertothesignificant，sinisterstillnessinhisbearing，thelurkingdangerofhisunsubduedtemper。`Histotemisthewolf，'sherepeatedtoherself。
　　`Hismotherisanold，unbrokenwolf。'Andthensheexperiencedakeenparoxyism，atransport，asifshehadmadesomeincrediblediscovery，knowntonobodyelseonearth。Astrangetransporttookpossessionofher，allherveinswereinaparoxysmofviolentsensation。`GoodGod！'sheexclaimedtoherself，`whatisthis？'Andthen，amomentafter，shewassayingassuredly，`Ishallknowmoreofthatman。'Shewastorturedwithdesiretoseehimagain，anostalgia，anecessitytoseehimagain，tomakesureitwasnotallamistake，thatshewasnotdeludingherself，thatshereallyfeltthisstrangeandoverwhelmingsensationonhisaccount，thisknowledgeofhiminheressence，thispowerfulapprehensionofhim。`AmIreallysingledoutforhiminsomeway，istherereallysomepalegold，arcticlightthatenvelopesonlyustwo？'sheaskedherself。Andshecouldnotbelieveit，sheremainedinamuse，scarcelyconsciousofwhatwasgoingonaround。
　　Thebridesmaidswerehere，andyetthebridegroomhadnotcome。Ursulawonderedifsomethingwasamiss，andiftheweddingwouldyetallgowrong。
　　Shefelttroubled，asifitresteduponher。Thechiefbridesmaidshadarrived。Ursulawatchedthemcomeupthesteps。Oneofthemsheknew，atall，slow，reluctantwomanwithaweightoffairhairandapale，longface。ThiswasHermioneRoddice，afriendoftheCriches。Nowshecamealong，withherheadheldup，balancinganenormousflathatofpaleyellowvelvet，onwhichwerestreaksofostrichfeathers，naturalandgrey。Shedriftedforwardasifscarcelyconscious，herlongblanchedfaceliftedup，nottoseetheworld。Shewasrich。Sheworeadressofsilky，frailvelvet，ofpaleyellowcolour，andshecarriedalotofsmallrose—colouredcyclamens。Hershoesandstockingswereofbrownishgrey，likethefeathersonherhat，herhairwasheavy，shedriftedalongwithapeculiarfixityofthehips，astrangeunwillingmotion。Shewasimpressive，inherlovelypale—yellowandbrownish—rose，yetmacabre，somethingrepulsive。Peopleweresilentwhenshepassed，impressed，roused，wantingtojeer，yetforsomereasonsilenced。Herlong，paleface，thatshecarriedliftedup，somewhatintheRossettifashion，seemedalmostdrugged，asifastrangemassofthoughtscoiledinthedarknesswithinher，andshewasneverallowedtoescape。
　　Ursulawatchedherwithfascination。Sheknewheralittle。ShewasthemostremarkablewomanintheMidlands。HerfatherwasaDerbyshireBaronetoftheoldschool，shewasawomanofthenewschool，fullofintellectuality，andheavy，nerve—wornwithconsciousness。Shewaspassionatelyinterestedinreform，hersoulwasgivenuptothepubliccause。Butshewasaman'swoman，itwasthemanlyworldthatheldher。
　　Shehadvariousintimaciesofmindandsoulwithvariousmenofcapacity。
　　Ursulaknew，amongthesemen，onlyRupertBirkin，whowasoneoftheschool—inspectorsofthecounty。ButGudrunhadmetothers，inLondon。Movingwithherartistfriendsindifferentkindsofsociety，Gudrunhadalreadycometoknowagoodmanypeopleofreputeandstanding。ShehadmetHermionetwice，buttheydidnottaketoeachother。ItwouldbequeertomeetagaindownhereintheMidlands，wheretheirsocialstandingwassodiverse，aftertheyhadknowneachotherontermsofequalityinthehousesofsundryacquaintancesintown。ForGudrunhadbeenasocialsuccess，andhadherfriendsamongtheslackaristocracythatkeepstouchwiththearts。
　　Hermioneknewherselftobewell—dressed;sheknewherselftobethesocialequal，ifnotfarthesuperior，ofanyoneshewaslikelytomeetinWilleyGreen。Sheknewshewasacceptedintheworldofcultureandofintellect。ShewasaKulturtrager，amediumforthecultureofideas。Withallthatwashighest，whetherinsocietyorinthoughtorinpublicaction，oreveninart，shewasatone，shemovedamongtheforemost，athomewiththem。Noonecouldputherdown，noonecouldmakemockofher，becauseshestoodamongthefirst，andthosethatwereagainstherwerebelowher，eitherinrank，orinwealth，orinhighassociationofthoughtandprogressandunderstanding。So，shewasinvulnerable。Allherlife，shehadsoughttomakeherselfinvulnerable，unassailable，beyondreachoftheworld'sjudgment。
　　Andyethersoulwastortured，exposed。Evenwalkingupthepathtothechurch，confidentasshewasthatineveryrespectshestoodbeyondallvulgarjudgment，knowingperfectlythatherappearancewascompleteandperfect，accordingtothefirststandards，yetshesufferedatorture，underherconfidenceandherpride，feelingherselfexposedtowoundsandtomockeryandtodespite。Shealwaysfeltvulnerable，vulnerable，therewasalwaysasecretchinkinherarmour。Shedidnotknowherselfwhatitwas。Itwasalackofrobustself，shehadnonaturalsufficiency，therewasaterriblevoid，alack，adeficiencyofbeingwithinher。
　　Andshewantedsomeonetocloseupthisdeficiency，tocloseitupforever。ShecravedforRupertBirkin。Whenhewasthere，shefeltcomplete，shewassufficient，whole。Fortherestoftimeshewasestablishedonthesand，builtoverachasm，and，inspiteofallhervanityandsecurities，anycommonmaid—servantofpositive，robusttempercouldflingherdownthisbottomlesspitofinsufficiency，bytheslightestmovementofjeeringorcontempt。Andallthewhilethepensive，torturedwomanpiledupherowndefencesofaestheticknowledge，andculture，andworld—visions，anddisinterestedness。Yetshecouldneverstopuptheterriblegapofinsufficiency。
　　IfonlyBirkinwouldformacloseandabidingconnectionwithher，shewouldbesafeduringthisfretfulvoyageoflife。Hecouldmakehersoundandtriumphant，triumphantovertheveryangelsofheaven。Ifonlyhewoulddoit！Butshewastorturedwithfear，withmisgiving。Shemadeherselfbeautiful，shestrovesohardtocometothatdegreeofbeautyandadvantage，whenheshouldbeconvinced。Butalwaystherewasadeficiency。
　　Hewasperversetoo。Hefoughtheroff，healwaysfoughtheroff。Themoreshestrovetobringhimtoher，themorehebattledherback。Andtheyhadbeenloversnow，foryears。Oh，itwassowearying，soaching;
　　shewassotired。Butstillshebelievedinherself。Sheknewhewastryingtoleaveher。Sheknewhewastryingtobreakawayfromherfinally，tobefree。Butstillshebelievedinherstrengthtokeephim，shebelievedinherownhigherknowledge。Hisownknowledgewashigh，shewasthecentraltouchstoneoftruth。Sheonlyneededhisconjunctionwithher。
　　Andthis，thisconjunctionwithher，whichwashishighestfulfilmentalso，withtheperversenessofawilfulchildhewantedtodeny。Withthewilfulnessofanobstinatechild，hewantedtobreaktheholyconnectionthatwasbetweenthem。
　　Hewouldbeatthiswedding;hewastobegroom'sman。Hewouldbeinthechurch，waiting。Hewouldknowwhenshecame。Sheshudderedwithnervousapprehensionanddesireasshewentthroughthechurch—door。Hewouldbethere，surelyhewouldseehowbeautifulherdresswas，surelyhewouldseehowshehadmadeherselfbeautifulforhim。Hewouldunderstand，hewouldbeabletoseehowshewasmadeforhim，thefirst，howshewas，forhim，thehighest。Surelyatlasthewouldbeabletoaccepthishighestfate，hewouldnotdenyher。
　　Inalittleconvulsionoftoo—tiredyearning，sheenteredthechurchandlookedslowlyalonghercheeksforhim，herslenderbodyconvulsedwithagitation。Asbestman，hewouldbestandingbesidethealtar。Shelookedslowly，deferringinhercertainty。
　　Andthen，hewasnotthere。Aterriblestormcameoverher，asifsheweredrowning。Shewaspossessedbyadevastatinghopelessness。Andsheapproachedmechanicallytothealtar。Neverhadsheknownsuchapangofutterandfinalhopelessness。Itwasbeyonddeath，soutterlynull，desert。
　　Thebridegroomandthegroom'smanhadnotyetcome。Therewasagrowingconsternationoutside。Ursulafeltalmostresponsible。Shecouldnotbearitthatthebrideshouldarrive，andnogroom。Theweddingmustnotbeafiasco，itmustnot。
　　Butherewasthebride'scarriage，adornedwithribbonsandcockades。
　　Gailythegreyhorsescurvettedtotheirdestinationatthechurch—gate，alaughterinthewholemovement。Herewasthequickofalllaughterandpleasure。Thedoorofthecarriagewasthrownopen，toletouttheveryblossomoftheday。Thepeopleontheroadwaymurmuredfaintlywiththediscontentedmurmuringofacrowd。
　　Thefathersteppedoutfirstintotheairofthemorning，likeashadow。
　　Hewasatall，thin，carewornman，withathinblackbeardthatwastouchedwithgrey。Hewaitedatthedoorofthecarriagepatiently，self—obliterated。
　　Intheopeningofthedoorwaywasashoweroffinefoliageandflowers，awhitenessofsatinandlace，andasoundofagayvoicesaying:
　　`HowdoIgetout？'
　　Arippleofsatisfactionranthroughtheexpectantpeople。Theypressedneartoreceiveher，lookingwithzestatthestoopingblondheadwithitsflowerbuds，andatthedelicate，white，tentativefootthatwasreachingdowntothestepofthecarriage。Therewasasuddenfoamingrush，andthebridelikeasuddensurf—rush，floatingallwhitebesideherfatherinthemorningshadowoftrees，herveilflowingwithlaughter。