Geraldwasherescapefromtheheavysloughofthepale,underworld,automaticcolliers。Hestartedoutofthemud。Hewasmaster。Shesawhisback,themovementofhiswhiteloins。Butnotthat——itwasthewhitenessheseemedtoencloseashebentforwards,rowing。Heseemedtostooptosomething。Hisglistening,whitishhairseemedliketheelectricityofthesky。
`There'sGudrun,'cameHermione'svoicefloatingdistinctoverthewater。
`Wewillgoandspeaktoher。Doyoumind?'
Geraldlookedroundandsawthegirlstandingbythewater'sedge,lookingathim。Hepulledtheboattowardsher,magnetically,withoutthinkingofher。Inhisworld,hisconsciousworld,shewasstillnobody。HeknewthatHermionehadacuriouspleasureintreadingdownallthesocialdifferences,atleastapparently,andheleftittoher。
`Howdoyoudo,Gudrun?'sangHermione,usingtheChristiannameinthefashionablemanner。`Whatareyoudoing?'
`Howdoyoudo,Hermione?Iwassketching。'
`Wereyou?'Theboatdriftednearer,tillthekeelgroundonthebank。
`Maywesee?Ishouldliketosomuch。'
ItwasnouseresistingHermione'sdeliberateintention。
`Well——'saidGudrunreluctantly,forshealwayshatedtohaveherunfinishedworkexposed——`there'snothingintheleastinteresting。'
`Isn'tthere?Butletmesee,willyou?'
Gudrunreachedoutthesketch—book,Geraldstretchedfromtheboattotakeit。Andashedidso,herememberedGudrun'slastwordstohim,andherfacelifteduptohimashesatontheswervinghorse。Anintensificationofpridewentoverhisnerves,becausehefelt,insomewayshewascompelledbyhim。Theexchangeoffeelingbetweenthemwasstrongandapartfromtheirconsciousness。
Andasifinaspell,Gudrunwasawareofhisbody,stretchingandsurginglikethemarsh—fire,stretchingtowardsher,hishandcomingstraightforwardlikeastem。Hervoluptuous,acuteapprehensionofhimmadethebloodfaintinherveins,hermindwentdimandunconscious。Andherockedonthewaterperfectly,liketherockingofphosphorescence。Helookedroundattheboat。Itwasdriftingoffalittle。Heliftedtheoartobringitback。
Andtheexquisitepleasureofslowlyarrestingtheboat,intheheavy—softwater,wascompleteasaswoon。
`That'swhatyouhavedone,'saidHermione,lookingsearchinglyattheplantsontheshore,andcomparingwithGudrun'sdrawing。GudrunlookedroundinthedirectionofHermione'slong,pointingfinger。`Thatisit,isn'tit?'repeatedHermione,needingconfirmation。
`Yes,'saidGudrunautomatically,takingnorealheed。
`Letmelook,'saidGerald,reachingforwardforthebook。ButHermioneignoredhim,hemustnotpresume,beforeshehadfinished。Buthe,hiswillasunthwartedandasunflinchingashers,stretchedforwardtillhetouchedthebook。Alittleshock,astormofrevulsionagainsthim,shookHermioneunconsciously。Shereleasedthebookwhenhehadnotproperlygotit,andittumbledagainstthesideoftheboatandbouncedintothewater。
`There!'sangHermione,withastrangeringofmalevolentvictory。`I'msosorry,soawfullysorry。Can'tyougetit,Gerald?'
ThislastwassaidinanoteofanxioussneeringthatmadeGerald'sveinstinglewithfinehateforher。Heleanedfaroutoftheboat,reachingdownintothewater。Hecouldfeelhispositionwasridiculous,hisloinsexposedbehindhim。
`Itisofnoimportance,'camethestrong,clangingvoiceofGudrun。
Sheseemedtotouchhim。Buthereachedfurther,theboatswayedviolently。
Hermione,however,remainedunperturbed。Hegraspedthebook,underthewater,andbroughtitup,dripping。
`I'msodreadfullysorry——dreadfullysorry,'repeatedHermione。`I'mafraiditwasallmyfault。'
`It'sofnoimportance——really,Iassureyou——itdoesn'tmatterintheleast,'saidGudrunloudly,withemphasis,herfaceflushedscarlet。
Andsheheldoutherhandimpatientlyforthewetbook,tohavedonewiththescene。Geraldgaveittoher。Hewasnotquitehimself。
`I'msodreadfullysorry,'repeatedHermione,tillbothGeraldandGudrunwereexasperated。`Istherenothingthatcanbedone?'
`Inwhatway?'askedGudrun,withcoolirony。
`Can'twesavethedrawings?'
Therewasamoment'spause,whereinGudrunmadeevidentallherrefutationofHermione'spersistence。
`Iassureyou,'saidGudrun,withcuttingdistinctness,`thedrawingsarequiteasgoodasevertheywere,formypurpose。Iwantthemonlyforreference。'
`Butcan'tIgiveyouanewbook?Iwishyou'dletmedothat。Ifeelsotrulysorry。Ifeelitwasallmyfault。'
`AsfarasIsaw,'saidGudrun,`itwasn'tyourfaultatall。Iftherewasanyfault,itwasMrCrich's。Butthewholethingisentirelytrivial,anditreallyisridiculoustotakeanynoticeofit。'
GeraldwatchedGudrunclosely,whilstsherepulsedHermione。Therewasabodyofcoldpowerinher。Hewatchedherwithaninsightthatamountedtoclairvoyance。Hesawheradangerous,hostilespirit,thatcouldstandundiminishedandunabated。Itwassofinished,andofsuchperfectgesture,moreover。
`I'mawfullygladifitdoesn'tmatter,'hesaid;`ifthere'snorealharmdone。'
Shelookedbackathim,withherfineblueeyes,andsignalledfullintohisspirit,asshesaid,hervoiceringingwithintimacyalmostcaressivenowitwasaddressedtohim:
`Ofcourse,itdoesn'tmatterintheleast。'
Thebondwasestablishedbetweenthem,inthatlook,inhertone。Inhertone,shemadetheunderstandingclear——theywereofthesamekind,heandshe,asortofdiabolicfreemasonrysubsistedbetweenthem。Henceforward,sheknew,shehadherpoweroverhim。Wherevertheymet,theywouldbesecretlyassociated。Andhewouldbehelplessintheassociationwithher。
Hersoulexulted。
`Good—bye!I'msogladyouforgiveme。Gooood—bye!'
Hermionesangherfarewell,andwavedherhand。Geraldautomaticallytooktheoarandpushedoff。Buthewaslookingallthetime,withaglimmering,subtly—smilingadmirationinhiseyes,atGudrun,whostoodontheshoalshakingthewetbookinherhand。Sheturnedawayandignoredtherecedingboat。ButGeraldlookedbackasherowed,beholdingher,forgettingwhathewasdoing。
`Aren'twegoingtoomuchtotheleft?'sangHermione,asshesatignoredunderhercolouredparasol。
Geraldlookedroundwithoutreplying,theoarsbalancedandglancinginthesun。
`Ithinkit'sallright,'hesaidgood—humouredly,beginningtorowagainwithoutthinkingofwhathewasdoing。AndHermionedislikedhimextremelyforhisgood—humouredobliviousness,shewasnullified,shecouldnotregainascendancy。
WomenInLove:Chapter11CHAPTERXIAnIslandMEANWHILEUrsulahadwanderedonfromWilleyWateralongthecourseofthebrightlittlestream。Theafternoonwasfulloflarks'singing。Onthebrighthill—sideswasasubduedsmoulderofgorse。
Afewforget—me—notsfloweredbythewater。Therewasarousednessandaglancingeverywhere。
Shestrayedabsorbedlyon,overthebrooks。Shewantedtogotothemill—pondabove。Thebigmill—housewasdeserted,saveforalabourerandhiswifewholivedinthekitchen。Soshepassedthroughtheemptyfarm—yardandthroughthewildernessofagarden,andmountedthebankbythesluice。
Whenshegottothetop,toseetheold,velvetysurfaceofthepondbeforeher,shenoticedamanonthebank,tinkeringwithapunt。ItwasBirkinsawingandhammeringaway。
Shestoodattheheadofthesluice,lookingathim。Hewasunawareofanybody'spresence。Helookedverybusy,likeawildanimal,activeandintent。Shefeltsheoughttogoaway,hewouldnotwanther。Heseemedtobesomuchoccupied。Butshedidnotwanttogoaway。Thereforeshemovedalongthebanktillhewouldlookup。
Whichhesoondid。Themomenthesawher,hedroppedhistoolsandcameforward,saying:
`Howdoyoudo?I'mmakingthepuntwater—tight。Tellmeifyouthinkitisright。'
Shewentalongwithhim。
`Youareyourfather'sdaughter,soyoucantellmeifitwilldo,'
hesaid。
Shebenttolookatthepatchedpunt。
`IamsureIammyfather'sdaughter,'shesaid,fearfulofhavingtojudge。`ButIdon'tknowanythingaboutcarpentry。Itlooksright,don'tyouthink?'
`Yes,Ithink。Ihopeitwon'tletmetothebottom,that'sall。Thoughevenso,itisn'tagreatmatter,Ishouldcomeupagain。Helpmetogetitintothewater,willyou?'
Withcombinedeffortstheyturnedovertheheavypuntandsetitafloat。
`Now,'hesaid,`I'lltryitandyoucanwatchwhathappens。Thenifitcarries,I'lltakeyouovertotheisland。'
`Do,'shecried,watchinganxiously。
Thepondwaslarge,andhadthatperfectstillnessandthedarklustreofverydeepwater。Thereweretwosmallislandsovergrownwithbushesandafewtrees,towardsthemiddle。Birkinpushedhimselfoff,andveeredclumsilyinthepond。Luckilythepuntdriftedsothathecouldcatchholdofawillowbough,andpullittotheisland。
`Ratherovergrown,'hesaid,lookingintotheinterior,`butverynice。
I'llcomeandfetchyou。Theboatleaksalittle。'
Inamomenthewaswithheragain,andshesteppedintothewetpunt。
`It'llfloatusallright,'hesaid,andmanoeuvredagaintotheisland。
Theylandedunderawillowtree。Sheshrankfromthelittlejungleofrankplantsbeforeher,evil—smellingfigwortandhemlock。Butheexploredintoit。
`Ishallmowthisdown,'hesaid,`andthenitwillberomantic——likePauletVirginie。'
`Yes,onecouldhavelovelyWatteaupicnicshere,'criedUrsulawithenthusiasm。
Hisfacedarkened。
`Idon'twantWatteaupicnicshere,'hesaid。
`OnlyyourVirginie,'shelaughed。
`Virginieenough,'hesmiledwryly。`No,Idon'twanthereither。'
Ursulalookedathimclosely。ShehadnotseenhimsinceBreadalby。
Hewasverythinandhollow,withaghastlylookinhisface。
`Youhavebeenill;haven'tyou?'sheasked,ratherrepulsed。
`Yes,'herepliedcoldly。
Theyhadsatdownunderthewillowtree,andwerelookingatthepond,fromtheirretreatontheisland。
`Hasitmadeyoufrightened?'sheasked。
`Whatof?'heasked,turninghiseyestolookather。Somethinginhim,inhumanandunmitigated,disturbedher,andshookheroutofherordinaryself。
`Itisfrighteningtobeveryill,isn'tit?'shesaid。
`Itisn'tpleasant,'hesaid。`Whetheroneisreallyafraidofdeath,ornot,Ihaveneverdecided。Inonemood,notabit,inanother,verymuch。'
`Butdoesn'titmakeyoufeelashamed?Ithinkitmakesonesoashamed,tobeill——illnessissoterriblyhumiliating,don'tyouthink?'
Heconsideredforsomeminutes。
`May—be,'hesaid。`Thoughoneknowsallthetimeone'slifeisn'treallyright,atthesource。That'sthehumiliation。Idon'tseethattheillnesscountssomuch,afterthat。Oneisillbecauseonedoesn'tliveproperly——can't。It'sthefailuretolivethatmakesoneill,andhumiliatesone。'
`Butdoyoufailtolive?'sheasked,almostjeering。
`Whyyes——Idon'tmakemuchofasuccessofmydays。Oneseemsalwaystobebumpingone'snoseagainsttheblankwallahead。'
Ursulalaughed。Shewasfrightened,andwhenshewasfrightenedshealwayslaughedandpretendedtobejaunty。
`Yourpoornose!'shesaid,lookingatthatfeatureofhisface。
`Nowonderit'sugly,'hereplied。
Shewassilentforsomeminutes,strugglingwithherownself—deception。
Itwasaninstinctinher,todeceiveherself。
`ButI'mhappy——Ithinklifeisawfullyjolly,'shesaid。
`Good,'heanswered,withacertaincoldindifference。
Shereachedforabitofpaperwhichhadwrappedasmallpieceofchocolateshehadfoundinherpocket,andbeganmakingaboat。Hewatchedherwithoutheedingher。Therewassomethingstrangelypatheticandtenderinhermoving,unconsciousfinger—tips,thatwereagitatedandhurt,really。
`Idoenjoythings——don'tyou?'sheasked。
`Ohyes!ButitinfuriatesmethatIcan'tgetright,atthereallygrowingpartofme。Ifeelalltangledandmessedup,andIcan'tgetstraightanyhow。Idon'tknowwhatreallytodo。Onemustdosomethingsomewhere。'
`Whyshouldyoualwaysbedoing?'sheretorted。`Itissoplebeian。
Ithinkitismuchbettertobereallypatrician,andtodonothingbutjustbeoneself,likeawalkingflower。'
`Iquiteagree,'hesaid,`ifonehasburstintoblossom。ButIcan'tgetmyflowertoblossomanyhow。Eitheritisblightedinthebud,orhasgotthesmother—fly,oritisn'tnourished。Curseit,itisn'tevenabud。
Itisacontravenedknot。'
Againshelaughed。Hewassoveryfretfulandexasperated。Butshewasanxiousandpuzzled。Howwasonetogetout,anyhow。Theremustbeawayoutsomewhere。
Therewasasilence,whereinshewantedtocry。Shereachedforanotherbitofchocolatepaper,andbegantofoldanotherboat。
`Andwhyisit,'sheaskedatlength,`thatthereisnoflowering,nodignityofhumanlifenow?'
`Thewholeideaisdead。Humanityitselfisdry—rotten,really。Therearemyriadsofhumanbeingshangingonthebush——andtheylookveryniceandrosy,yourhealthyyoungmenandwomen。ButtheyareapplesofSodom,asamatteroffact,DeadSeaFruit,gall—apples。Itisn'ttruethattheyhaveanysignificance——theirinsidesarefullofbitter,corruptash。'
`Buttherearegoodpeople,'protestedUrsula。
`Goodenoughforthelifeoftoday。Butmankindisadeadtree,coveredwithfinebrilliantgallsofpeople。'
Ursulacouldnothelpstiffeningherselfagainstthis,itwastoopicturesqueandfinal。Butneithercouldshehelpmakinghimgoon。
`Andifitisso,whyisit?'sheasked,hostile。Theywererousingeachothertoafinepassionofopposition。
`Why,whyarepeopleallballsofbitterdust?Becausetheywon'tfalloffthetreewhenthey'reripe。Theyhangontotheiroldpositionswhenthepositionisover—past,tilltheybecomeinfestedwithlittlewormsanddry—rot。'
Therewasalongpause。Hisvoicehadbecomehotandverysarcastic。
Ursulawastroubledandbewildered,theywerebothobliviousofeverythingbuttheirownimmersion。
`Butevenifeverybodyiswrong——whereareyouright?'shecried,`whereareyouanybetter?'
`I?——I'mnotright,'hecriedback。`AtleastmyonlyrightnessliesinthefactthatIknowit。IdetestwhatIam,outwardly。Iloathemyselfasahumanbeing。Humanityisahugeaggregatelie,andahugelieislessthanasmalltruth。Humanityisless,farlessthantheindividual,becausetheindividualmaysometimesbecapableoftruth,andhumanityisatreeoflies。Andtheysaythatloveisthegreatestthing;theypersistinsayingthis,thefoulliars,andjustlookatwhattheydo!Lookatallthemillionsofpeoplewhorepeateveryminutethatloveisthegreatest,andcharityisthegreatest——andseewhattheyaredoingallthetime。Bytheirworksyeshallknowthem,fordirtyliarsandcowards,whodaren'tstandbytheirownactions,muchlessbytheirownwords。'
`But,'saidUrsulasadly,`thatdoesn'talterthefactthatloveisthegreatest,doesit?Whattheydodoesn'talterthetruthofwhattheysay,doesit?'
`Completely,becauseifwhattheysayweretrue,thentheycouldn'thelpfulfillingit。Buttheymaintainalie,andsotheyrunamokatlast。
It'salietosaythatloveisthegreatest。Youmightaswellsaythathateisthegreatest,sincetheoppositeofeverythingbalances。Whatpeoplewantishate——hateandnothingbuthate。Andinthenameofrighteousnessandlove,theygetit。Theydistilthemselveswithnitroglycerine,allthelotofthem,outofverylove。It'stheliethatkills。Ifwewanthate,letushaveit——death,murder,torture,violentdestruction——
letushaveit:butnotinthenameoflove。ButIabhorhumanity,Iwishitwassweptaway。Itcouldgo,andtherewouldbenoabsoluteloss,ifeveryhumanbeingperishedtomorrow。Therealitywouldbeuntouched。
Nay,itwouldbebetter。Therealtreeoflifewouldthenberidofthemostghastly,heavycropofDeadSeaFruit,theintolerableburdenofmyriadsimulacraofpeople,aninfiniteweightofmortallies。'
`Soyou'dlikeeverybodyintheworlddestroyed?'saidUrsula。
`Ishouldindeed。'
`Andtheworldemptyofpeople?'
`Yestruly。Youyourself,don'tyoufinditabeautifulcleanthought,aworldemptyofpeople,justuninterruptedgrass,andaharesittingup?'
ThepleasantsincerityofhisvoicemadeUrsulapausetoconsiderherownproposition。Andreallyitwasattractive:aclean,lovely,humanlessworld。Itwasthereallydesirable。Herhearthesitated,andexulted。Butstill,shewasdissatisfiedwithhim。
`But,'sheobjected,`you'dbedeadyourself,sowhatgoodwoulditdoyou?'
`Iwoulddielikeashot,toknowthattheearthwouldreallybecleanedofallthepeople。Itisthemostbeautifulandfreeingthought。Thentherewouldneverbeanotherfoulhumanitycreated,forauniversaldefilement。'
`No,'saidUrsula,`therewouldbenothing。'
`What!Nothing?Justbecausehumanitywaswipedout?Youflatteryourself。
There'dbeeverything。'
`Buthow,iftherewerenopeople?'
`Doyouthinkthatcreationdependsonman!Itmerelydoesn't。
Therearethetreesandthegrassandbirds。Imuchprefertothinkofthelarkrisingupinthemorninguponahuman—lessworld。Manisamistake,hemustgo。Thereisthegrass,andharesandadders,andtheunseenhosts,actualangelsthatgoaboutfreelywhenadirtyhumanitydoesn'tinterruptthem——andgoodpure—tissueddemons:verynice。'
ItpleasedUrsula,whathesaid,pleasedherverymuch,asaphantasy。
Ofcourseitwasonlyapleasantfancy。Sheherselfknewtoowelltheactualityofhumanity,itshideousactuality。Sheknewitcouldnotdisappearsocleanlyandconveniently。Ithadalongwaytogoyet,alongandhideousway。Hersubtle,feminine,demoniacalsoulknewitwell。
`Ifonlymanwassweptoffthefaceoftheearth,creationwouldgoonsomarvellously,withanewstart,non—human。Manisoneofthemistakesofcreation——liketheichthyosauri。Ifonlyheweregoneagain,thinkwhatlovelythingswouldcomeoutoftheliberateddays;——thingsstraightoutofthefire。'
`Butmanwillneverbegone,'shesaid,withinsidious,diabolicalknowledgeofthehorrorsofpersistence。`Theworldwillgowithhim。'
`Ahno,'heanswered,`notso。Ibelieveintheproudangelsandthedemonsthatareourfore—runners。Theywilldestroyus,becausewearenotproudenough。Theichthyosauriwerenotproud:theycrawledandflounderedaswedo。Andbesides,lookatelder—flowersandbluebells——theyareasignthatpurecreationtakesplace——eventhebutterfly。Buthumanitynevergetsbeyondthecaterpillarstage——itrotsinthechrysalis,itneverwillhavewings。Itisanti—creation,likemonkeysandbaboons。'
Ursulawatchedhimashetalked。Thereseemedacertainimpatientfuryinhim,allthewhile,andatthesametimeagreatamusementineverything,andafinaltolerance。Anditwasthistoleranceshemistrusted,notthefury。Shesawthat,allthewhile,inspiteofhimself,hewouldhavetobetryingtosavetheworld。Andthisknowledge,whilstitcomfortedherheartsomewherewithalittleself—satisfaction,stability,yetfilledherwithacertainsharpcontemptandhateofhim。Shewantedhimtoherself,shehatedtheSalvatorMunditouch。Itwassomethingdiffuseandgeneralisedabouthim,whichshecouldnotstand。Hewouldbehaveinthesameway,saythesamethings,givehimselfascompletelytoanybodywhocamealong,anybodyandeverybodywholikedtoappealtohim。Itwasdespicable,averyinsidiousformofprostitution。
`But,'shesaid,`youbelieveinindividuallove,evenifyoudon'tbelieveinlovinghumanity——?'
`Idon'tbelieveinloveatall——thatis,anymorethanIbelieveinhate,oringrief。Loveisoneoftheemotionslikealltheothers——
andsoitisallrightwhilstyoufeelitButIcan'tseehowitbecomesanabsolute。Itisjustpartofhumanrelationships,nomore。Anditisonlypartofanyhumanrelationship。Andwhyoneshouldberequiredalwaystofeelit,anymorethanonealwaysfeelssorrowordistantjoy,Icannotconceive。Loveisn'tadesideratum——itisanemotionyoufeeloryoudon'tfeel,accordingtocircumstance。'
`Thenwhydoyoucareaboutpeopleatall?'sheasked,`ifyoudon'tbelieveinlove?Whydoyoubotherabouthumanity?'
`WhydoI?BecauseIcan'tgetawayfromit。'
`Becauseyouloveit,'shepersisted。
Itirritatedhim。
`IfIdoloveit,'hesaid,`itismydisease。'
`Butitisadiseaseyoudon'twanttobecuredof,'shesaid,withsomecoldsneering。
Hewassilentnow,feelingshewantedtoinsulthim。
`Andifyoudon'tbelieveinlove,whatdoyoubelievein?'sheaskedmocking。`Simplyintheendoftheworld,andgrass?'
Hewasbeginningtofeelafool。
`Ibelieveintheunseenhosts,'hesaid。
`Andnothingelse?Youbelieveinnothingvisible,exceptgrassandbirds?Yourworldisapoorshow。'
`Perhapsitis,'hesaid,coolandsuperiornowhewasoffended,assumingacertaininsufferablealoofsuperiority,andwithdrawingintohisdistance。
Ursuladislikedhim。Butalsoshefeltshehadlostsomething。Shelookedathimashesatcrouchedonthebank。TherewasacertainpriggishSunday—schoolstiffnessoverhim,priggishanddetestable。Andyet,atthesametime,themouldingofhimwassoquickandattractive,itgavesuchagreatsenseoffreedom:themouldingofhisbrows,hischin,hiswholephysique,somethingsoalive,somewhere,inspiteofthelookofsickness。
Anditwasthisdualityinfeelingwhichhecreatedinher,thatmadeafinehateofhimquickeninherbowels。Therewashiswonderful,desirablelife—rapidity,therarequalityofanutterlydesirableman:andtherewasatthesametimethisridiculous,meaneffacementintoaSalvatorMundiandaSunday—schoolteacher,aprigofthestiffesttype。
Helookedupather。Hesawherfacestrangelyenkindled,asifsuffusedfromwithinbyapowerfulsweetfire。Hissoulwasarrestedinwonder。
Shewasenkindledinherownlivingfire。Arrestedinwonderandinpure,perfectattraction,hemovedtowardsher。Shesatlikeastrangequeen,almostsupernaturalinherglowingsmilingrichness。
`Thepointaboutlove,'hesaid,hisconsciousnessquicklyadjustingitself,`isthatwehatethewordbecausewehavevulgarisedit。Itoughttobeprescribed,tabooedfromutterance,formanyyears,tillwegetanew,betteridea。'
Therewasabeamofunderstandingbetweenthem。
`Butitalwaysmeansthesamething,'shesaid。
`AhGod,no,letitnotmeanthatanymore,'hecried。`Lettheoldmeaningsgo。'
`Butstillitislove,'shepersisted。Astrange,wickedyellowlightshoneathiminhereyes。
Hehesitated,baffled,withdrawing。
`No,'hesaid,`itisn't。Spokenlikethat,neverintheworld。You'venobusinesstouttertheword。'
`Imustleaveittoyou,totakeitoutoftheArkoftheCovenantattherightmoment,'shemocked。
Againtheylookedateachother。Shesuddenlysprangup,turnedherbacktohim,andwalkedaway。Hetooroseslowlyandwenttothewater'sedge,where,crouching,hebegantoamusehimselfunconsciously。Pickingadaisyhedroppeditonthepond,sothatthestemwasakeel,theflowerfloatedlikealittlewaterlily,staringwithitsopenfaceuptothesky。Itturnedslowlyround,inaslow,slowDervishdance,asitveeredaway。
Hewatchedit,thendroppedanotherdaisyintothewater,andafterthatanother,andsatwatchingthemwithbright,absolvedeyes,crouchingnearonthebank。Ursulaturnedtolook。Astrangefeelingpossessedher,asifsomethingweretakingplace。Butitwasallintangible。Andsomesortofcontrolwasbeingputonher。Shecouldnotknow。Shecouldonlywatchthebrilliantlittlediscsofthedaisiesveeringslowlyintravelonthedark,lustrouswater。Thelittleflotillawasdriftingintothelight,acompanyofwhitespecksinthedistance。
`Doletusgototheshore,tofollowthem,'shesaid,afraidofbeinganylongerimprisonedontheisland。Andtheypushedoffinthepunt。
Shewasgladtobeonthefreelandagain。Shewentalongthebanktowardsthesluice。Thedaisieswerescatteredbroadcastonthepond,tinyradiantthings,likeanexaltation,pointsofexaltationhereandthere。Whydidtheymovehersostronglyandmystically?
`Look,'hesaid,`yourboatofpurplepaperisescortingthem,andtheyareaconvoyofrafts。'
Someofthedaisiescameslowlytowardsher,hesitating,makingashybrightlittlecotilliononthedarkclearwater。Theirgaybrightcandourmovedhersomuchastheycamenear,thatshewasalmostintears。
`Whyaretheysolovely,'shecried。`WhydoIthinkthemsolovely?'
`Theyareniceflowers,'hesaid,heremotionaltonesputtingaconstraintonhim。
`Youknowthatadaisyisacompanyofflorets,aconcourse,becomeindividual。Don'tthebotanistsputithighestinthelineofdevelopment?
Ibelievetheydo。'
`Thecompositae,yes,Ithinkso,'saidUrsula,whowasneververysureofanything。Thingssheknewperfectlywell,atonemoment,seemedtobecomedoubtfulthenext。
`Explainitso,then,'hesaid。`Thedaisyisaperfectlittledemocracy,soit'sthehighestofflowers,henceitscharm。'
`No,'shecried,`no——never。Itisn'tdemocratic。'
`No,'headmitted。`It'sthegoldenmoboftheproletariat,surroundedbyashowywhitefenceoftheidlerich。'
`Howhateful——yourhatefulsocialorders!'shecried。
`Quite!It'sadaisy——we'llleaveitalone。'
`Do。Letitbeadarkhorseforonce,'shesaid:`ifanythingcanbeadarkhorsetoyou,'sheaddedsatirically。
Theystoodaside,forgetful。Asifalittlestunned,theybothweremotionless,barelyconscious。Thelittleconflictintowhichtheyhadfallenhadtorntheirconsciousnessandleftthemliketwoimpersonalforces,thereincontact。
Hebecameawareofthelapse。Hewantedtosaysomething,togetontoanewmoreordinaryfooting。
`Youknow,'hesaid,`thatIamhavingroomshereatthemill?Don'tyouthinkwecanhavesomegoodtimes?'
`Ohareyou?'shesaid,ignoringallhisimplicationofadmittedintimacy。