Besides，myfatherhadagreatmanytheories;hepridedhimselfonhisconservativeopinions;hethoughttheusualAmericanlaisser—
　　allerineducationwasaveryvulgarpractice，andthatchildrenwerenottogrowuplikedustythornsbythewayside。"Soyousee，"
　　Pickeringwenton，smilingandblushing，andyetwithsomethingoftheironyofvainregret，"Iamaregulargardenplant。Ihavebeenwatchedandwateredandpruned，andifthereisanyvirtueintendingIoughttotaketheprizeataflowershow。Somethreeyearsagomyfather’shealthbrokedown，andhewaskeptverymuchwithindoors。
　　So，althoughIwasamangrown，Ilivedaltogetherathome。IfIwasoutofhissightforaquarterofanhourhesentsomeoneafterme。
　　Hehadsevereattacksofneuralgia，andheusedtositathiswindow，baskinginthesun。Hekeptanopera—glassathand，andwhenIwasoutinthegardenheusedtowatchmewithit。AfewdaysbeforehisdeathIwastwenty—sevenyearsold，andthemostinnocentyouth，I
　　suppose，onthecontinent。AfterhediedImissedhimgreatly，"
　　Pickeringcontinued，evidentlywithnointentionofmakinganepigram。"Istayedathome，inasortofdullstupor。Itseemedasiflifeoffereditselftomeforthefirsttime，andyetasifI
　　didn’tknowhowtotakeholdofit。"
　　Heutteredallthiswithafrankeagernesswhichincreasedashetalked，andtherewasasingularcontrastbetweenthemeagreexperiencehedescribedandacertainradiantintelligencewhichI
　　seemedtoperceiveinhisglanceandtone。Evidentlyhewasacleverfellow，andhisnaturalfacultieswereexcellent。Iimaginedhehadreadagreatdeal，andrecovered，insomedegree，inrestlessintellectualconjecture，thefreedomhewascondemnedtoignoreinpractice。Opportunitywasnowofferingameaningtotheemptyformswithwhichhisimaginationwasstored，butitappearedtohimdimly，throughtheveilofhispersonaldiffidence。
　　"Ihavenotsailedroundtheworld，asyousuppose，"Isaid，"butI
　　confessIenvyyouthenoveltiesyouaregoingtobehold。ComingtoHomburgyouhaveplungedinmediasres。"
　　Heglancedatmetoseeifmyremarkcontainedanallusion，andhesitatedamoment。"Yes，Iknowit。IcametoBremeninthesteamerwithaveryfriendlyGerman，whoundertooktoinitiatemeintothegloriesandmysteriesoftheFatherland。Atthisseason，hesaid，ImustbeginwithHomburg。Ilandedbutafortnightago，andhereIam。"Againhehesitated，asifheweregoingtoaddsomethingaboutthesceneattheKursaalbutsuddenly，nervously，hetookuptheletterwhichwaslyingbesidehim，lookedhardatthesealwithatroubledfrown，andthenflungitbackonthegrasswithasigh。
　　"HowlongdoyouexpecttobeinEurope？"Iasked。
　　"SixmonthsIsupposedwhenIcame。Butnotsolong——now！"Andhelethiseyeswandertotheletteragain。
　　"Andwhereshallyougo——whatshallyoudo？"
　　"Everywhere，everything，Ishouldhavesaidyesterday。Butnowitisdifferent。"
　　Iglancedattheletter——interrogatively，andhegravelypickeditupandputitintohispocket。Wetalkedforawhilelonger，butIsawthathehadsuddenlybecomepreoccupied;thathewasapparentlyweighinganimpulsetobreaksomelastbarrierofreserve。Atlasthesuddenlylaidhishandonmyarm，lookedatmeamomentappealingly，andcried，"Uponmyword，Ishouldliketotellyoueverything！"
　　"Tellmeeverything，byallmeans，"Ianswered，smiling。"Idesirenothingbetterthantoliehereintheshadeandheareverything。"
　　"Ah，butthequestionis，willyouunderstandit？Nomatter;youthinkmeaqueerfellowalready。It’snoteasy，either，totellyouwhatIfeel——noteasyforsoqueerafellowasItotellyouinhowmanywaysheisqueer！"Hegotupandwalkedawayamoment，passinghishandoverhiseyes，thencamebackrapidlyandflunghimselfonthegrassagain。"IsaidjustnowIalwayssupposedIwashappy;
　　it’strue;butnowthatmyeyesareopen，IseeIwasonlystultified。Iwaslikeapoodle—dogthatisledaboutbyablueribbon，andscouredandcombedandfedonslops。Itwasnotlife;
　　lifeislearningtoknowone’sself，andinthatsenseIhavelivedmoreinthepastsixweeksthaninalltheyearsthatprecededthem。
　　Iamfilledwiththisfeverishsenseofliberation;itkeepsrisingtomyheadlikethefumesofstrongwine。IfindIamanactive，sentient，intelligentcreature，withdesires，withpassions，withpossibleconvictions——evenwithwhatIneverdreamedof，apossiblewillofmyown！Ifindthereisaworldtoknow，alifetolead，menandwomentoformathousandrelationswith。Itallliestherelikeagreatsurgingsea，wherewemustplungeanddiveandfeelthebreezeandbreastthewaves。Istandshiveringhereonthebrink，staring，longing，wondering，charmedbythesmellofthebrineandyetafraidofthewater。Theworldbeckonsandsmilesandcalls，butanamelessinfluencefromthepast，thatIcanneitherwhollyobeynorwhollyresist，seemstoholdmeback。Iamfullofimpulses，but，somehow，Iamnotfullofstrength。Lifeseemsinspiringatcertainmoments，butitseemsterribleandunsafe;andIaskmyselfwhyIshouldwantonlymeasuremyselfwithmercilessforces，whenI
　　havelearnedsowellhowtostandasideandletthempass。Whyshouldn’tIturnmybackuponitallandgohometo——whatawaitsme？—
　　—tothatsightless，soundlesscountrylife，andlongdaysspentamongoldbooks？ButifamanISweak，hedoesn’twanttoassentbeforehandtohisweakness;hewantstotastewhateversweetnesstheremaybeinpayingfortheknowledge。Soitisthatitcomesback——thisirresistibleimpulsetotakemyplunge——toletmyselfswing，togowherelibertyleadsme。"Hepausedamoment，fixingmewithhisexcitedeyes，andperhapsperceivedinmyownanirrepressiblesmileathisperplexity。"’Swingahead，inHeaven’sname，’youwanttosay，’andmuchgoodmayitdoyou。’Idon’tknowwhetheryouarelaughingatmyscruplesoratwhatpossiblystrikesyouasmydepravity。Idoubt，"hewentongravely，"whetherIhaveaninclinationtowardwrong—doing;ifIhave，IamsureIshallnotprosperinit。IhonestlybelieveImaysafelytakeoutalicensetoamusemyself。Butitisn’tthatIthinkof，anymorethanIdreamof，playingwithsuffering。Pleasureandpainareemptywordstome;
　　whatIlongforisknowledge——someotherknowledgethancomestousinformal，colourless，impersonalprecept。Youwouldunderstandallthisbetterifyoucouldbreatheforanhourthemustyin—dooratmosphereinwhichIhavealwayslived。Tobreakawindowandletinlightandair——IfeelasifatlastImustACT！"
　　"Act，byallmeans，nowandalways，whenyouhaveachance，"I
　　answered。"Butdon’ttakethingstoohard，noworever。Yourlongconfinementmakesyouthinktheworldbetterworthknowingthanyouarelikelytofindit。Amanwithasgoodaheadandheartasyourshasaveryampleworldwithinhimself，andIamnobelieverinartforart，norinwhat’scalled’life’forlife’ssake。Nevertheless，takeyourplunge，andcomeandtellmewhetheryouhavefoundthepearlofwisdom。"Hefrownedalittle，asifhethoughtmysympathyatriflemeagre。Ishookhimbythehandandlaughed。"Thepearlofwisdom，"Icried，"islove;honestloveinthemostconvenientconcentrationofexperience！Iadviseyoutofallinlove。"Hegavemenosmileinresponse，butdrewfromhispockettheletterofwhichIhavespoken，helditup，andshookitsolemnly。"Whatisit？"I
　　asked。
　　"Itismysentence！"
　　"Notofdeath，Ihope！"
　　"Ofmarriage。"
　　"Withwhom？"
　　"WithapersonIdon’tlove。"
　　Thiswasserious。Istoppedsmiling，andbeggedhimtoexplain。
　　"Itisthesingularpartofmystory，"hesaidatlast。"Itwillremindyouofanold—fashionedromance。SuchasIsithere，talkinginthiswildway，andtossingoffprovocationstodestiny，mydestinyissettledandsealed。Iamengaged，Iamgiveninmarriage。It’sabequestofthepast——thepastIhadnohandin！Themarriagewasarrangedbymyfather，yearsago，whenIwasaboy。Theyounggirl’sfatherwashisparticularfriend;hewasalsoawidower，andwasbringinguphisdaughter，onhisside，inthesamesevereseclusioninwhichIwasspendingmydays。TothisdayIamunacquaintedwiththeoriginofthebondofunionbetweenourrespectiveprogenitors。
　　Mr。Vernorwaslargelyengagedinbusiness，andIimaginethatonceuponatimehefoundhimselfinafinancialstraitandwashelpedthroughitbymyfather’scomingforwardwithaheavyloan，onwhich，inhissituation，hecouldoffernosecuritybuthisword。Ofthismyfatherwasquitecapable。Hewasamanofdogmas，andhewassuretohavearuleoflife——asclearasifithadbeenwrittenoutinhisbeautifulcopper—platehand——adaptedtotheconductofagentlemantowardafriendinpecuniaryembarrassment。Whatismore，hewassuretoadheretoit。Mr。Vernor，Ibelieve，gotonhisfeet，paidhisdebt，andvowedmyfatheraneternalgratitude。Hislittledaughterwastheappleofhiseye，andhepledgedhimselftobringheruptobethewifeofhisbenefactor’sson。Soourfatewasfixed，parentally，andwehavebeeneducatedforeachother。Ihavenotseenmybetrothedsinceshewasaveryplain—facedlittlegirlinastickypinafore，huggingaone—armeddoll——ofthemalesex，I
　　believe——asbigasherself。Mr。VernorisinwhatiscalledtheEasterntrade，andhasbeenlivingthesemanyyearsatSmyrna。
　　Isabelhasgrownupthereinawhite—walledgarden，inanorangegrove，betweenherfatherandhergoverness。Sheisagooddealmyjunior;sixmonthsagoshewasseventeen;whensheiseighteenwearetomarry。"
　　Herelatedallthiscalmlyenough，withouttheaccentofcomplaint，drilyratheranddoggedly，asifhewerewearyofthinkingofit。
　　"It’saromance，indeed，forthesedulldays，"Isaid，"andI
　　heartilycongratulateyou。It’snoteveryyoungmanwhofinds，onreachingthemarryingage，awifekeptinaboxofrose—leavesforhim。AthousandtooneMissVernorischarming;Iwonderyoudon’tpostofftoSmyrna。"
　　"Youarejoking，"heanswered，withawoundedair，"andIamterriblyserious。Letmetellyoutherest。Ineversuspectedthissuperiorconspiracytillsomethinglessthanayearago。Myfather，wishingtoprovideagainsthisdeath，informedmeofitverysolemnly。Iwasneitherelatednordepressed;Ireceivedit，asIremember，withasortofemotionwhichvariedonlyindegreefromthatwithwhichI
　　couldhavehailedtheannouncementthathehadorderedmeasetofnewshirts。Isupposedthatwasthewaythatallmarriagesweremade;Ihadheardoftheirbeingmadeinheaven，andwhatwasmyfatherbutadivinity？Novelsandpoems，indeed，talkedaboutfallinginlove;butnovelsandpoemswereonethingandlifewasanother。Ashorttimeafterwardsheintroducedmetoaphotographofmypredestined，whohasapretty，butanextremelyinanimate，face。
　　Afterthishishealthfailedrapidly。OnenightIwassitting，asI
　　habituallysatforhours，inhisdimly—lightedroom，nearhisbed，towhichhehadbeenconfinedforaweek。Hehadnotspokenforsometime，andIsupposedhewasasleep;buthappeningtolookathimI
　　sawhiseyeswideopen，andfixedonmestrangely。Hewassmilingbenignantly，intensely，andinamomenthebeckonedtome。Then，onmygoingtohim——’IfeelthatIshallnotlastlong，’hesaid;’butI
　　amwillingtodiewhenIthinkhowcomfortablyIhavearrangedyourfuture。’Hewastalkingofdeath，andanythingbutgriefatthatmomentwasdoubtlessimpiousandmonstrous;buttherecameintomyheartforthefirsttimeathrobbingsenseofbeingover—governed。I
　　saidnothing，andhethoughtmysilencewasallsorrow。’Ishallnotlivetoseeyoumarried，’hewenton，’butsincethefoundationislaid，thatlittlesignifies;itwouldbeaselfishpleasure，andI
　　haveneverthoughtofmyselfbutinyou。Toforeseeyourfuture，initsmainoutline，toknowtoacertaintythatyouwillbesafelydomiciledhere，withawifeapprovedbymyjudgment，cultivatingthemoralfruitofwhichIhavesowntheseed——thiswillcontentme。
　　But，myson，Iwishtoclearthisbrightvisionfromtheshadowofadoubt。Ibelieveinyourdocility;IbelieveImaytrustthesalutaryforceofyourrespectformymemory。ButImustrememberthatwhenIamremovedyouwillstandherealone，facetofacewithahundrednamelesstemptationstoperversity。Thefumesofunrighteouspridemayriseintoyourbrainandtemptyou，intheinterestofavulgartheorywhichitwillcallyourindependence，toshattertheedificeIhavesolaboriouslyconstructed。SoImustaskyouforapromise——thesolemnpromiseyouowemycondition。’Andhegraspedmyhand。’YouwillfollowthepathIhavemarked;youwillbefaithfultotheyounggirlwhomaninfluenceasdevotedasthatwhichhasgovernedyourownyounglifehasmouldedintoeverythingamiable;youwillmarryIsabelVernor。’Thiswaspretty’steep，’asweusedtosayatschool。Iwasfrightened;Idrewawaymyhandandaskedtobetrustedwithoutanysuchterriblevow。Myreluctancestartledmyfatherintoasuspicionthatthevulgartheoryofindependencehadalreadybeenwhisperingtome。Hesatupinhisbedandlookedatmewitheyeswhichseemedtoforeseealifetimeofodiousingratitude。
　　Ifeltthereproach;Ifeelitnow。Ipromised！AndevennowI
　　don’tregretmypromisenorcomplainofmyfather’stenacity。I
　　feel，somehow，asiftheseedsofultimatereposehadbeensowninthoseunsuspectingyears——asifaftermanydaysImightgatherthemellowfruit。Butaftermanydays！Iwillkeepmypromise，Iwillobey;butIwanttoLIVEfirst！"
　　"Mydearfellow，youarelivingnow。Allthispassionateconsciousnessofyoursituationisaveryardentlife。IwishI
　　couldsayasmuchformyown。"
　　"Iwanttoforgetmysituation。Iwanttospendthreemonthswithoutthinkingofthepastorthefuture，graspingwhateverthepresentoffersme。YesterdayIthoughtIwasinafairwaytosailwiththetide。Butthismorningcomesthismemento！"Andhehelduphisletteragain。
　　"Whatisit？"
　　"AletterfromSmyrna。"
　　"Iseeyouhavenotyetbrokentheseal。"
　　"No;nordoImeanto，forthepresent。Itcontainsbadnews。"
　　"Whatdoyoucallbadnews？"
　　"NewsthatIamexpectedinSmyrnainthreeweeks。NewsthatMr。
　　Vernordisapprovesofmyrovingabouttheworld。Newsthathisdaughterisstandingexpectantatthealtar。"
　　"Isnotthispureconjecture？"
　　"Conjecture，possibly，butsafeconjecture。AssoonasIlookedatthelettersomethingsmotemeattheheart。Lookatthedeviceontheseal，andIamsureyouwillfindit’sTARRYNOT！"Andheflungtheletteronthegrass。
　　"Uponmyword，youhadbetteropenit，"Isaid。
　　"IfIweretoopenitandreadmysummons，doyouknowwhatIshoulddo？IshouldmarchhomeandasktheOberkellnerhowonegetstoSmyrna，packmytrunk，takemyticket，andnotstoptillIarrived。
　　IknowIshould;itwouldbethefascinationofhabit。Theonlyway，therefore，towandertomyrope’sendistoleavetheletterunread。"
　　"Inyourplace，"Isaid，"curiositywouldmakemeopenit。"
　　Heshookhishead。"Ihavenocuriosity！Foralongtimenowtheideaofmymarriagehasceasedtobeanovelty，andIhavecontemplateditmentallyineverypossiblelight。Ifearnothingfromthatside，butIdofearsomethingfromconscience。Iwantmyhandstied。Willyoudomeafavour？Pickuptheletter，putitintoyourpocket，andkeepittillIaskyouforit。WhenIdo，youmayknowthatIamatmyrope’send。"
　　Itooktheletter，smiling。"Andhowlongisyourropetobe？TheHomburgseasondoesn’tlastforever。"
　　"Doesitlastamonth？Letthatbemyseason！Amonthhenceyouwillgiveitbacktome。"
　　"To—morrowifyousayso。Meanwhile，letitrestinpeace！"AndI
　　consignedittothemostsacredintersticeofmypocket—book。TosaythatIwasdisposedtohumourthepoorfellowwouldseemtobesayingthatIthoughthisrequestfantastic。Itwashissituation，bynofaultofhisown，thatwasfantastic，andhewasonlytryingtobenatural。Hewatchedmeputawaytheletter，andwhenithaddisappearedgaveasoftsighofrelief。Thesighwasnatural，andyetitsetmethinking。Hisgeneralrecoilfromanimmediateresponsibilityimposedbyothersmightbewholesomeenough;butiftherewasanoldgrievanceononeside，wastherenotpossiblyanew—
　　borndelusionontheother？Itwouldbeunkindtowithholdareflectionthatmightserveasawarning;soItoldhim，abruptly，thatIhadbeenanundiscoveredspectator，thenightbefore，ofhisexploitsatroulette。
　　Heblusheddeeply，buthemetmyeyeswiththesamecleargood