Thispurelovehas,however,beenmuchaidedbytheambitiontobeesteemedbymyfellownaturalists。FrommyearlyyouthIhavehadthestrongestdesiretounderstandorexplainwhateverIobserved,——thatis,togroupallfactsundersomegenerallaws。Thesecausescombinedhavegivenmethepatiencetoreflectorponderforanynumberofyearsoveranyunexplainedproblem。AsfarasIcanjudge,Iamnotapttofollowblindlytheleadofothermen。Ihavesteadilyendeavouredtokeepmymindfreesoastogiveupanyhypothesis,howevermuchbeloved(andIcannotresistformingoneoneverysubject),assoonasfactsareshowntobeopposedtoit。Indeed,I
havehadnochoicebuttoactinthismanner,forwiththeexceptionoftheCoralReefs,Icannotrememberasinglefirst—formedhypothesiswhichhadnotafteratimetobegivenuporgreatlymodified。Thishasnaturallyledmetodistrustgreatlydeductivereasoninginthemixedsciences。Ontheotherhand,Iamnotverysceptical,——aframeofmindwhichIbelievetobeinjurioustotheprogressofscience。Agooddealofscepticisminascientificmanisadvisabletoavoidmuchlossoftime,butIhavemetwithnotafewmen,who,Ifeelsure,haveoftenthusbeendeterredfromexperimentorobservations,whichwouldhaveproveddirectlyorindirectlyserviceable。
Inillustration,IwillgivetheoddestcasewhichIhaveknown。A
gentleman(who,asIafterwardsheard,isagoodlocalbotanist)wrotetomefromtheEasterncountiesthattheseedorbeansofthecommonfield—
beanhadthisyeareverywheregrownonthewrongsideofthepod。Iwroteback,askingforfurtherinformation,asIdidnotunderstandwhatwasmeant;butIdidnotreceiveanyanswerforaverylongtime。Ithensawintwonewspapers,onepublishedinKentandtheotherinYorkshire,paragraphsstatingthatitwasamostremarkablefactthat"thebeansthisyearhadallgrownonthewrongside。"SoIthoughttheremustbesomefoundationforsogeneralastatement。Accordingly,Iwenttomygardener,anoldKentishman,andaskedhimwhetherhehadheardanythingaboutit,andheanswered,"Oh,no,sir,itmustbeamistake,forthebeansgrowonthewrongsideonlyonleap—year,andthisisnotleap—year。"Ithenaskedhimhowtheygrewincommonyearsandhowonleap—years,butsoonfoundthatheknewabsolutelynothingofhowtheygrewatanytime,buthestucktohisbelief。
AfteratimeIheardfrommyfirstinformant,who,withmanyapologies,saidthatheshouldnothavewrittentomehadhenotheardthestatementfromseveralintelligentfarmers;butthathehadsincespokenagaintoeveryoneofthem,andnotoneknewintheleastwhathehadhimselfmeant。
Sothathereabelief——ifindeedastatementwithnodefiniteideaattachedtoitcanbecalledabelief——hadspreadoveralmostthewholeofEnglandwithoutanyvestigeofevidence。
Ihaveknowninthecourseofmylifeonlythreeintentionallyfalsifiedstatements,andoneofthesemayhavebeenahoax(andtherehavebeenseveralscientifichoaxes)which,however,tookinanAmericanAgriculturalJournal。ItrelatedtotheformationinHollandofanewbreedofoxenbythecrossingofdistinctspeciesofBos(someofwhichIhappentoknowaresteriletogether),andtheauthorhadtheimpudencetostatethathehadcorrespondedwithme,andthatIhadbeendeeplyimpressedwiththeimportanceofhisresult。ThearticlewassenttomebytheeditorofanEnglishAgriculturalJournal,askingformyopinionbeforerepublishingit。
Asecondcasewasanaccountofseveralvarieties,raisedbytheauthorfromseveralspeciesofPrimula,whichhadspontaneouslyyieldedafullcomplementofseed,althoughtheparentplantshadbeencarefullyprotectedfromtheaccessofinsects。ThisaccountwaspublishedbeforeIhaddiscoveredthemeaningofheterostylism,andthewholestatementmusthavebeenfraudulent,ortherewasneglectinexcludinginsectssogrossastobescarcelycredible。
Thethirdcasewasmorecurious:Mr。Huthpublishedinhisbookon’ConsanguineousMarriage’somelongextractsfromaBelgianauthor,whostatedthathehadinterbredrabbitsintheclosestmannerforverymanygenerations,withouttheleastinjuriouseffects。TheaccountwaspublishedinamostrespectableJournal,thatoftheRoyalSocietyofBelgium;butIcouldnotavoidfeelingdoubts——Ihardlyknowwhy,exceptthattherewerenoaccidentsofanykind,andmyexperienceinbreedinganimalsmademethinkthisveryimprobable。
SowithmuchhesitationIwrotetoProfessorVanBeneden,askinghimwhethertheauthorwasatrustworthyman。IsoonheardinanswerthattheSocietyhadbeengreatlyshockedbydiscoveringthatthewholeaccountwasafraud。(ThefalsenessofthepublishedstatementsonwhichMr。Huthreliedhasbeenpointedoutbyhimselfinaslipinsertedinallthecopiesofhisbookwhichthenremainedunsold。)ThewriterhadbeenpubliclychallengedintheJournaltosaywherehehadresidedandkepthislargestockofrabbitswhilecarryingonhisexperiments,whichmusthaveconsumedseveralyears,andnoanswercouldbeextractedfromhim。
Myhabitsaremethodical,andthishasbeenofnotalittleuseformyparticularlineofwork。Lastly,Ihavehadampleleisurefromnothavingtoearnmyownbread。Evenill—health,thoughithasannihilatedseveralyearsofmylife,hassavedmefromthedistractionsofsocietyandamusement。
Thereforemysuccessasamanofscience,whateverthismayhaveamountedto,hasbeendetermined,asfarasIcanjudge,bycomplexanddiversifiedmentalqualitiesandconditions。Ofthese,themostimportanthavebeen——
theloveofscience——unboundedpatienceinlongreflectingoveranysubject——industryinobservingandcollectingfacts——andafairshareofinventionaswellasofcommonsense。WithsuchmoderateabilitiesasI
possess,itistrulysurprisingthatIshouldhaveinfluencedtoaconsiderableextentthebeliefofscientificmenonsomeimportantpoints。
CHAPTER1。III。
REMINISCENCESOFMYFATHER’SEVERYDAYLIFE。
Itismywishinthepresentchaptertogivesomeideaofmyfather’severydaylife。IthasseemedtomethatImightcarryoutthisobjectintheformofaroughsketchofaday’slifeatDown,interspersedwithsuchrecollectionsasarecalledupbytherecord。Manyoftheserecollections,whichhaveameaningforthosewhoknewmyfather,willseemcolourlessortriflingtostrangers。Nevertheless,Igivetheminthehopethattheymayhelptopreservethatimpressionofhispersonalitywhichremainsonthemindsofthosewhoknewandlovedhim——animpressionatoncesovividandsountranslatableintowords。
Ofhispersonalappearance(inthesedaysofmultipliedphotographs)itishardlynecessarytosaymuch。Hewasaboutsixfeetinheight,butscarcelylookedsotall,ashestoopedagooddeal;inlaterdaysheyieldedtothestoop;butIcanrememberseeinghimlongagoswinginghisarmsbacktoopenouthischest,andholdinghimselfuprightwithajerk。
Hegaveonetheideathathehadbeenactiveratherthanstrong;hisshoulderswerenotbroadforhisheight,thoughcertainlynotnarrow。Asayoungmanhemusthavehadmuchendurance,forononeoftheshoreexcursionsfromthe"Beagle",whenallweresufferingfromwantofwater,hewasoneofthetwowhowerebetterablethantheresttostruggleoninsearchofit。Asaboyhewasactive,andcouldjumpabarplacedattheheightofthe"Adam’sapple"inhisneck。
Hewalkedwithaswingingaction,usingastickheavilyshodwithiron,whichhestruckloudlyagainsttheground,producingashewentroundthe"Sand—walk"atDown,arhythmicalclickwhichiswithallofusaverydistinctremembrance。Ashereturnedfromthemiddaywalk,oftencarryingthewaterprooforcloakwhichhadprovedtoohot,onecouldseethattheswingingstepwaskeptupbysomethingofaneffort。Indoorshisstepwasoftenslowandlaboured,andashewentupstairsintheafternoonhemightbeheardmountingthestairswithaheavyfootfall,asifeachstepwereaneffort。Wheninterestedinhisworkhemovedaboutquicklyandeasilyenough,andofteninthemiddleofdictatinghewenteagerlyintothehalltogetapinchofsnuff,leavingthestudydooropen,andcallingoutthelastwordsofhissentenceashewent。Indoorshesometimesusedanoaksticklikealittlealpenstock,andthiswasasignthathefeltgiddiness。
Inspiteofhisstrengthandactivity,Ithinkhemustalwayshavehadaclumsinessofmovement。Hewasnaturallyawkwardwithhishands,andwasunabletodrawatallwell。(Thefigurerepresentingtheaggregatedcell—
contentsin’InsectivorousPlants’wasdrawnbyhim。)Thishealwaysregrettedmuch,andhefrequentlyurgedtheparamountnecessityofayoungnaturalistmakinghimselfagooddraughtsman。
Hecoulddissectwellunderthesimplemicroscope,butIthinkitwasbydintofhisgreatpatienceandcarefulness。Itwascharacteristicofhimthathethoughtmanylittlebitsofskilfuldissectionsomethingalmostsuperhuman。HeusedtospeakwithadmirationoftheskillwithwhichhesawNewportdissectahumblebee,gettingoutthenervoussystemwithafewcutsofafinepairofscissors,held,asmyfatherusedtoshow,withtheelbowraised,andinanattitudewhichcertainlywouldrendergreatsteadinessnecessary。Heusedtoconsidercuttingsectionsagreatfeat,andinthelastyearofhislife,withwonderfulenergy,tookthepainstolearntocutsectionsofrootsandleaves。Hishandwasnotsteadyenoughtoholdtheobjecttobecut,andheemployedacommonmicrotome,inwhichthepithforholdingtheobjectwasclamped,andtherazorslidonaglasssurfaceinmakingthesections。Heusedtolaughathimself,andathisownskillinsection—cutting,atwhichhewouldsayhewas"speechlesswithadmiration。"Ontheotherhand,hemusthavehadaccuracyofeyeandpowerofco—ordinatinghismovements,sincehewasagoodshotwithagunasayoungman,andasaboywasskilfulinthrowing。Heoncekilledaharesittingintheflower—gardenatShrewsburybythrowingamarbleatit,and,asaman,heoncekilledacross—beakwithastone。Hewassounhappyathavinguselesslykilledthecross—beakthathedidnotmentionitforyears,andthenexplainedthatheshouldneverhavethrownatitifhehadnotfeltsurethathisoldskillhadgonefromhim。
Whenwalkinghehadafidgettingmovementwithhisfingers,whichhehasdescribedinoneofhisbooksasthehabitofanoldman。Whenhesatstillheoftentookholdofonewristwiththeotherhand;hesatwithhislegscrossed,andfrombeingsothintheycouldbecrossedveryfar,asmaybeseeninoneofthephotographs。Hehadhischairinthestudyandinthedrawing—roomraisedsoastobemuchhigherthanordinarychairs;thiswasdonebecausesittingonaloworevenanordinarychaircausedhimsomediscomfort。Weusedtolaughathimformakinghistalldrawing—roomchairstillhigherbyputtingfootstoolsonit,andthenneutralisingtheresultbyrestinghisfeetonanotherchair。
Hisbeardwasfullandalmostuntrimmed,thehairbeinggreyandwhite,fineratherthancoarse,andwavyorfrizzled。Hismoustachewassomewhatdisfiguredbybeingcutshortandsquareacross。Hebecameverybald,havingonlyafringeofdarkhairbehind。
Hisfacewasruddyincolour,andthisperhapsmadepeoplethinkhimlessofaninvalidthanhewas。HewrotetoDr。Hooker(June13,1849),"EveryonetellsmethatIlookquitebloomingandbeautiful;andmostthinkIamshamming,butyouhaveneverbeenoneofthose。"Anditmustberememberedthatatthistimehewasmiserablyill,farworsethaninlateryears。Hiseyeswerebluishgreyunderdeepoverhangingbrows,withthickbushyprojectingeyebrows。Hishighforeheadwasmuchwrinkled,butotherwisehisfacewasnotmuchmarkedorlined。Hisexpressionshowednosignsofthecontinualdiscomforthesuffered。
Whenhewasexcitedwithpleasanttalkhiswholemannerwaswonderfullybrightandanimated,andhisfacesharedtothefullinthegeneralanimation。Hislaughwasafreeandsoundingpeal,likethatofamanwhogiveshimselfsympatheticallyandwithenjoymenttothepersonandthethingwhichhaveamusedhim。Heoftenusedsomesortofgesturewithhislaugh,liftinguphishandsorbringingonedownwithaslap。Ithink,generallyspeaking,hewasgiventogesture,andoftenusedhishandsinexplaininganything(e。g。thefertilisationofaflower)inawaythatseemedratheranaidtohimselfthantothelistener。Hedidthisonoccasionswhenmostpeoplewouldillustratetheirexplanationsbymeansofaroughpencilsketch。
Heworedarkclothes,ofalooseandeasyfit。OflateyearshegaveupthetallhateveninLondon,andworeasoftblackoneinwinter,andabigstrawhatinsummer。Hisusualout—of—doorsdresswastheshortcloakinwhichElliotandFry’sphotographrepresentshimleaningagainstthepillaroftheverandah。Twopeculiaritiesofhisindoordresswerethathealmostalwaysworeashawloverhisshoulders,andthathehadgreatlooseclothbootslinedwithfurwhichhecouldsliponoverhisindoorshoes。Likemostdelicatepeoplehesufferedfromheataswellasfromchilliness;itwasasifhecouldnothitthebalancebetweentoohotandtoocold;oftenamentalcausewouldmakehimtoohot,sothathewouldtakeoffhiscoatifanythingwentwronginthecourseofhiswork。
Heroseearly,chieflybecausehecouldnotlieinbed,andIthinkhewouldhavelikedtogetupearlierthanhedid。Hetookashortturnbeforebreakfast,ahabitwhichbeganwhenhewentforthefirsttimetoawater—cureestablishment。Thishabithekeptuptillalmosttheendofhislife。Iused,asalittleboy,tolikegoingoutwithhim,andIhaveavaguesenseoftheredofthewintersunrise,andarecollectionofthepleasantcompanionship,andacertainhonourandgloryinit。Heusedtodelightmeasaboybytellingmehow,instillearlierwalks,ondarkwintermornings,hehadonceortwicemetfoxestrottinghomeatthedawning。
Afterbreakfastingaloneabout7。45,hewenttoworkatonce,consideringthe11/2hourbetween8and9。30oneofhisbestworkingtimes。At9。30
hecameintothedrawing—roomforhisletters——rejoicingifthepostwasalightoneandbeingsometimesmuchworriedifitwasnot。Hewouldthenhearanyfamilylettersreadaloudashelayonthesofa。
Thereadingaloud,whichalsoincludedpartofanovel,lastedtillabouthalf—pastten,whenhewentbacktoworktilltwelveoraquarterpast。Bythistimeheconsideredhisday’sworkover,andwouldoftensay,inasatisfiedvoice,"I’VEdoneagoodday’swork。"Hethenwentoutofdoorswhetheritwaswetorfine;Polly,hiswhiteterrier,wentwithhiminfairweather,butinrainsherefusedormightbeseenhesitatingintheverandah,withamixedexpressionofdisgustandshameatherownwantofcourage;generally,however,herconsciencecarriedtheday,andassoonashewasevidentlygoneshecouldnotbeartostaybehind。
Myfatherwasalwaysfondofdogs,andasayoungmanhadthepowerofstealingawaytheaffectionsofhissister’spets;atCambridge,hewontheloveofhiscousinW。D。Fox’sdog,andthismayperhapshavebeenthelittlebeastwhichusedtocreepdowninsidehisbedandsleepatthefooteverynight。Myfatherhadasurlydog,whowasdevotedtohim,butunfriendlytoeveryoneelse,andwhenhecamebackfromthe"Beagle"
voyage,thedogrememberedhim,butinacuriousway,whichmyfatherwasfondoftelling。Hewentintotheyardandshoutedinhisoldmanner;thedogrushedoutandsetoffwithhimonhiswalk,showingnomoreemotionorexcitementthanifthesamethinghadhappenedthedaybefore,insteadoffiveyearsago。Thisstoryismadeuseofinthe’DescentofMan,’2ndEdition,page74。
Inmymemorytherewereonlytwodogswhichhadmuchconnectionwithmyfather。Onewasalargeblackandwhitehalf—bredretriever,calledBob,towhichwe,aschildren,weremuchdevoted。Hewasthedogofwhomthestoryofthe"hot—houseface"istoldinthe’ExpressionoftheEmotions。’
Butthedogmostcloselyassociatedwithmyfatherwastheabove—mentionedPolly,arough,whitefox—terrier。Shewasasharp—witted,affectionatedog;whenhermasterwasgoingawayonajourney,shealwaysdiscoveredthefactbythesignsofpackinggoingoninthestudy,andbecamelow—spiritedaccordingly。Shebegan,too,tobeexcitedbyseeingthestudypreparedforhisreturnhome。Shewasacunninglittlecreature,andusedtotrembleorputonanairofmiserywhenmyfatherpassed,whileshewaswaitingfordinner,justasifsheknewthathewouldsay(ashedidoftensay)that"shewasfamishing。"Myfatherusedtomakehercatchbiscuitsoffhernose,andhadanaffectionateandmock—solemnwayofexplainingtoherbefore—handthatshemust"beaverygoodgirl。"Shehadamarkonherbackwhereshehadbeenburnt,andwherethehairhadre—grownredinsteadofwhite,andmyfatherusedtocommendherforthistuftofhairasbeinginaccordancewithhistheoryofpangenesis;herfatherhadbeenaredbull—terrier,thustheredhairappearingaftertheburnshowedthepresenceoflatentredgemmules。HewasdelightfullytendertoPolly,andnevershowedanyimpatienceattheattentionssherequired,suchastobeletinatthedoor,oroutattheverandahwindow,tobarkat"naughtypeople,"aself—imposeddutyshemuchenjoyed。Shedied,orratherhadtobekilled,afewdaysafterhisdeath。(ThebasketinwhichsheusuallylaycurledupnearthefireinhisstudyisfaithfullyrepresentedinMr。
Parson’sdrawing,"TheStudyatDown。")
Myfather’smiddaywalkgenerallybeganbyacallatthegreenhouse,wherehelookedatanygerminatingseedsorexperimentalplantswhichrequiredacasualexamination,buthehardlyeverdidanyseriousobservingatthistime。Thenhewentonforhisconstitutional——eitherroundthe"Sand—
walk,"oroutsidehisowngroundsintheimmediateneighbourhoodofthehouse。The"Sand—walk"wasanarrowstripofland11/2acresinextent,withagravel—walkroundit。Ononesideofitwasabroadoldshawwithfair—sizedoaksinit,whichmadeashelteredshadywalk;theothersidewasseparatedfromaneighbouringgrassfieldbyalowquicksethedge,overwhichyoucouldlookatwhatviewtherewas,aquietlittlevalleylosingitselfintheuplandcountrytowardstheedgeoftheWesterhamhill,withhazelcoppiceandlarchwood,theremnantsofwhatwasoncealargewood,stretchingawaytotheWesterhamroad。IhaveheardmyfathersaythatthecharmofthissimplelittlevalleyhelpedtomakehimsettleatDown。
TheSand—walkwasplantedbymyfatherwithavarietyoftrees,suchashazel,alder,lime,hornbeam,birch,privet,anddogwood,andwithalonglineofholliesalldowntheexposedside。Inearliertimeshetookacertainnumberofturnseveryday,andusedtocountthembymeansofaheapofflints,oneofwhichhekickedoutonthepatheachtimehepassed。
OflateyearsIthinkhedidnotkeeptoanyfixednumberofturns,buttookasmanyashefeltstrengthfor。TheSand—walkwasourplay—groundaschildren,andherewecontinuallysawmyfatherashewalkedround。Helikedtoseewhatweweredoing,andwaseverreadytosympathizeinanyfunthatwasgoingon。Itiscurioustothinkhow,withregardtotheSand—walkinconnectionwithmyfather,myearliestrecollectionscoincidewithmylatest;itshowshowunvaryinghishabitshavebeen。
Sometimeswhenalonehestoodstillorwalkedstealthilytoobservebirdsorbeasts。Itwasononeoftheseoccasionsthatsomeyoungsquirrelsranuphisbackandlegs,whiletheirmotherbarkedattheminanagonyfromthetree。Healwaysfoundbirds’nestsevenuptothelastyearsofhislife,andwe,aschildren,consideredthathehadaspecialgeniusinthisdirection。Inhisquietprowlshecameacrossthelesscommonbirds,butI
fancyheusedtoconcealitfromme,asalittleboy,becauseheobservedtheagonyofmindwhichIenduredatnothavingseenthesiskinorgoldfinch,orwhateveritmighthavebeen。Heusedtotellushow,whenhewascreepingnoiselesslyalonginthe"Big—Woods,"hecameuponafoxasleepinthedaytime,whichwassomuchastonishedthatittookagoodstareathimbeforeitranoff。ASpitzdogwhichaccompaniedhimshowednosignofexcitementatthefox,andheusedtoendthestorybywonderinghowthedogcouldhavebeensofaint—hearted。
Anotherfavouriteplacewas"OrchisBank,"abovethequietCudhamvalley,wherefly—andmusk—orchisgrewamongthejunipers,andCephalantheraandNeottiaunderthebeechboughs;thelittlewood"Hangrove,"justabovethis,hewasalsofondof,andhereIrememberhiscollectinggrasses,whenhetookafancytomakeoutthenamesofallthecommonkinds。Hewasfondofquotingthesayingofoneofhislittleboys,who,havingfoundagrassthathisfatherhadnotseenbefore,haditlaidbyhisownplateduringdinner,remarking,"Iareanextraordinarygrass—finder!"
Myfathermuchenjoyedwanderingslowlyinthegardenwithmymotherorsomeofhischildren,ormakingoneofaparty,sittingoutonabenchonthelawn;hegenerallysat,however,onthegrass,andIrememberhimoftenlyingunderoneofthebiglime—trees,withhisheadonthegreenmoundatitsfoot。Indrysummerweather,whenweoftensatout,thebigfly—wheelofthewellwascommonlyheardspinninground,andsothesoundbecameassociatedwiththosepleasantdays。Heusedtoliketowatchusplayingatlawn—tennis,andoftenknockedupastrayballforuswiththecurvedhandleofhisstick。
Thoughhetooknopersonalshareinthemanagementofthegarden,hehadgreatdelightinthebeautyofflowers——forinstance,inthemassofAzaleaswhichgenerallystoodinthedrawing—room。Ithinkhesometimesfusedtogetherhisadmirationofthestructureofaflowerandofitsintrinsicbeauty;forinstance,inthecaseofthebigpendulouspinkandwhiteflowersofDielytra。Inthesamewayhehadanaffection,half—
artistic,half—botanical,forthelittleblueLobelia。Inadmiringflowers,hewouldoftenlaughatthedingyhigh—artcolours,andcontrastthemwiththebrighttintsofnature。Iusedtoliketohearhimadmirethebeautyofaflower;itwasakindofgratitudetothefloweritself,andapersonalloveforitsdelicateformandcolour。Iseemtorememberhimgentlytouchingaflowerhedelightedin;itwasthesamesimpleadmirationthatachildmighthave。
Hecouldnothelppersonifyingnaturalthings。Thisfeelingcameoutinabuseaswellasinpraise——e。g。ofsomeseedlings——"ThelittlebeggarsaredoingjustwhatIdon’twantthemto。"Hewouldspeakinahalf—provoked,half—admiringwayoftheingenuityofaMimosaleafinscrewingitselfoutofabasinofwaterinwhichhehadtriedtofixit。OnemustseethesamespiritinhiswayofspeakingofSundew,earth—worms,etc。(Cf。LeslieStephen’s’Swift,’1882,page200,whereSwift’sinspectionofthemannersandcustomsofservantsarecomparedtomyfather’sobservationsonworms,"Thedifferenceis,"saysMr。Stephen,"thatDarwinhadnonebutkindlyfeelingsforworms。")
Withinmymemory,hisonlyoutdoorrecreation,besideswalking,wasriding,whichhetooktoontherecommendationofDr。BenceJones,andwehadthelucktofindforhimtheeasiestandquietestcobintheworld,named"Tommy。"Heenjoyedtheseridesextremely,anddevisedanumberofshortroundswhichbroughthimhomeintimeforlunch。Ourcountryisgoodforthispurpose,owingtothenumberofsmallvalleyswhichgiveavarietytowhatinaflatcountrywouldbeadullloopofroad。Hewasnot,Ithink,naturallyfondofhorses,norhadheahighopinionoftheirintelligence,andTommywasoftenlaughedatforthealarmheshowedatpassingandrepassingthesameheapofhedge—clippingsashewentroundthefield。I
thinkheusedtofeelsurprisedathimself,whenherememberedhowboldariderhehadbeen,andhowutterlyoldageandbadhealthhadtakenawayhisnerve。Hewouldsaythatridingpreventedhimthinkingmuchmoreeffectuallythanwalking——thathavingtoattendtothehorsegavehimoccupationsufficienttopreventanyreallyhardthinking。Andthechangeofscenewhichitgavehimwasgoodforspiritsandhealth。
Unluckily,TommyonedayfellheavilywithhimonKestoncommon。This,andanaccidentwithanotherhorse,upsethisnerves,andhewasadvisedtogiveupriding。
IfIgobeyondmyownexperience,andrecallwhatIhaveheardhimsayofhisloveforsport,etc。,Icanthinkofagooddeal,butmuchofitwouldbearepetitionofwhatiscontainedinhis’Recollections。’Atschoolhewasfondofbat—fives,andthiswastheonlygameatwhichhewasskilful。
Hewasfondofhisgunasquiteaboy,andbecameagoodshot;heusedtotellhowinSouthAmericahekilledtwenty—threesnipeintwenty—fourshots。IntellingthestoryhewascarefultoaddthathethoughttheywerenotquitesowildasEnglishsnipe。
LuncheonatDowncameafterhismiddaywalk;andhereImaysayawordortwoabouthismealsgenerally。Hehadaboy—likeloveofsweets,unluckilyforhimself,sincehewasconstantlyforbiddentotakethem。Hewasnotparticularlysuccessfulinkeepingthe"vows,"ashecalledthem,whichhemadeagainsteatingsweets,andneverconsideredthembindingunlesshemadethemaloud。
Hedrankverylittlewine,butenjoyed,andwasrevivedby,thelittlehediddrink。Hehadahorrorofdrinking,andconstantlywarnedhisboysthatanyonemightbeledintodrinkingtoomuch。Iremember,inmyinnocenceasasmallboy,askinghimifhehadbeenevertipsy;andheansweredverygravelythathewasashamedtosayhehadoncedrunktoomuchatCambridge。Iwasmuchimpressed,sothatIknownowtheplacewherethequestionwasasked。
Afterhislunch,hereadthenewspaper,lyingonthesofainthedrawing—
room。Ithinkthepaperwastheonlynon—scientificmatterwhichhereadtohimself。Everythingelse,novels,travels,history,wasreadaloudtohim。Hetooksowideaninterestinlife,thattherewasmuchtooccupyhiminnewspapers,thoughhelaughedatthewordinessofthedebates;
readingthem,Ithink,onlyinabstract。Hisinterestinpoliticswasconsiderable,buthisopiniononthesematterswasformedratherbythewaythanwithanyseriousamountofthought。
Afterhereadhispaper,camehistimeforwritingletters。These,aswellastheMS。ofhisbooks,werewrittenbyhimashesatinahugehorse—hairchairbythefire,hispapersupportedonaboardrestingonthearmsofthechair。Whenhehadmanyorlongletterstowrite,hewoulddictatethemfromaroughcopy;theseroughcopieswerewrittenonthebacksofmanuscriptorofproof—sheets,andwerealmostillegible,sometimeseventohimself。HemadearuleofkeepingALLlettersthathereceived;thiswasahabitwhichhelearntfromhisfather,andwhichhesaidhadbeenofgreatusetohim。
Hereceivedmanylettersfromfoolish,unscrupulouspeople,andallofthesereceivedreplies。Heusedtosaythatifhedidnotanswerthem,hehaditonhisconscienceafterwards,andnodoubtitwasingreatmeasurethecourtesywithwhichheansweredeveryone,whichproducedtheuniversalandwidespreadsenseofhiskindnessofnature,whichwassoevidentonhisdeath。
Hewasconsideratetohiscorrespondentsinotherandlesserthings,forinstancewhendictatingalettertoaforeignerhehardlyeverfailedtosaytome,"You’dbettertryandwritewell,asit’stoaforeigner。"Hislettersweregenerallywrittenontheassumptionthattheywouldbecarelesslyread;thus,whenhewasdictating,hewascarefultotellmetomakeanimportantclausebeginwithanobviousparagraph"tocatchhiseye,"asheoftensaid。Howmuchhethoughtofthetroublehegaveothersbyaskingquestions,willbewellenoughshownbyhisletters。Itisdifficulttosayanythingaboutthegeneraltoneofhisletters,theywillspeakforthemselves。Theunvaryingcourtesyofthemisverystriking。I
hadaproofofthisqualityinthefeelingwithwhichMr。Hacon,hissolicitor,regardedhim。Hehadneverseenmyfather,yethadasincerefeelingoffriendshipforhim,andspokeespeciallyofhislettersasbeingsuchasamanseldomreceivesinthewayofbusiness:——"EverythingIdidwasright,andeverythingwasprofuselythankedfor。"
Hehadaprintedformtobeusedinreplyingtotroublesomecorrespondents,buthehardlyeverusedit;Isupposeheneverfoundanoccasionthatseemedexactlysuitable。Irememberanoccasiononwhichitmighthavebeenusedwithadvantage。HereceivedaletterfromastrangerstatingthatthewriterhadundertakentoupholdEvolutionatadebatingsociety,andthatbeingabusyyoungman,withouttimeforreading,hewishedtohaveasketchofmyfather’sviews。Eventhiswonderfulyoungmangotacivilanswer,thoughIthinkhedidnotgetmuchmaterialforhisspeech。
Hisrulewastothankthedonorsofbooks,butnotofpamphlets。Hesometimesexpressedsurprisethatsofewpeoplethankedhimforhisbookswhichhegaveawayliberally;thelettersthathedidreceivegavehimmuchpleasure,becausehehabituallyformedsohumbleanestimateofthevalueofallhisworks,thathewasgenerallysurprisedattheinterestwhichtheyexcited。
Inmoneyandbusinessmattershewasremarkablycarefulandexact。Hekeptaccountswithgreatcare,classifyingthem,andbalancingattheendoftheyearlikeamerchant。Irememberthequickwayinwhichhewouldreachoutforhisaccount—booktoentereachchequepaid,asthoughhewereinahurrytogetitenteredbeforehehadforgottenit。Hisfathermusthaveallowedhimtobelievethathewouldbepoorerthanhereallywas,forsomeofthedifficultyexperiencedinfindingahouseinthecountrymusthavearisenfromthemodestsumhefeltpreparedtogive。Yetheknew,ofcourse,thathewouldbeineasycircumstances,forinhis’Recollections’
hementionsthisasoneofthereasonsforhisnothavingworkedatmedicinewithsomuchzealashewouldhavedoneifhehadbeenobligedtogainhisliving。
Hehadapeteconomyinpaper,butitwasratherahobbythanarealeconomy。Alltheblanksheetsoflettersreceivedwerekeptinaportfoliotobeusedinmakingnotes;itwashisrespectforpaperthatmadehimwritesomuchonthebacksofhisoldMS。,andinthisway,unfortunately,hedestroyedlargepartsoftheoriginalMS。ofhisbooks。Hisfeelingaboutpaperextendedtowastepaper,andheobjected,halfinfun,tothecarelesscustomofthrowingaspillintothefireafterithadbeenusedforlightingacandle。
Myfatherwaswonderfullyliberalandgeneroustoallhischildreninthematterofmoney,andIhavespecialcausetorememberhiskindnesswhenI
thinkofthewayinwhichhepaidsomeCambridgedebtsofmine——makingitalmostseemavirtueinmetohavetoldhimofthem。Inhislateryearshehadthekindandgenerousplanofdividinghissurplusattheyear’sendamonghischildren。
Hehadagreatrespectforpurebusinesscapacity,andoftenspokewithadmirationofarelativewhohaddoubledhisfortune。AndofhimselfwouldoftensayinfunthatwhathereallyWASproudofwasthemoneyhehadsaved。Healsofeltsatisfactioninthemoneyhemadebyhisbooks。Hisanxietytosavecameinagreatmeasurefromhisfearsthathischildrenwouldnothavehealthenoughtoearntheirownlivings,aforebodingwhichfairlyhauntedhimformanyyears。AndIhaveadimrecollectionofhissaying,"ThankGod,you’llhavebreadandcheese,"whenIwassoyoungthatIwasratherinclinedtotakeitliterally。
Whenletterswerefinished,aboutthreeintheafternoon,herestedinhisbedroom,lyingonthesofaandsmokingacigarette,andlisteningtoanovelorotherbooknotscientific。Heonlysmokedwhenresting,whereassnuffwasastimulant,andwastakenduringworkinghours。Hetooksnuffformanyyearsofhislife,havinglearntthehabitatEdinburghasastudent。Hehadanicesilversnuff—boxgivenhimbyMrs。WedgwoodofMaer,whichhevaluedmuch——butherarelycarriedit,becauseittemptedhimtotaketoomanypinches。Inoneofhisearlylettershespeaksofhavinggivenupsnuffforamonth,anddescribeshimselfasfeeling"mostlethargic,stupid,andmelancholy。"Ourformerneighbourandclergyman,Mr。BrodieInnes,tellsmethatatonetimemyfathermadearesolvenottotakesnuffexceptawayfromhome,"amostsatisfactoryarrangementforme,"
headds,"asIkeptaboxinmystudytowhichtherewasaccessfromthegardenwithoutsummoningservants,andIhadmorefrequently,thanmighthavebeenotherwisethecase,theprivilegeofafewminutes’conversationwithmydearfriend。"Hegenerallytooksnufffromajaronthehalltable,becausehavingtogothisdistanceforapinchwasaslightcheck;
theclinkofthelidofthesnuffjarwasaveryfamiliarsound。Sometimeswhenhewasinthedrawing—room,itwouldoccurtohimthatthestudyfiremustbeburninglow,andwhensomeofusofferedtoseeafterit,itwouldturnoutthathealsowishedtogetapinchofsnuff。
Smokingheonlytooktopermanentlyoflateyears,thoughonhisPampasrideshelearnedtosmokewiththeGauchos,andIhaveheardhimspeakofthegreatcomfortofacupofmateandacigarettewhenhehaltedafteralongrideandwasunabletogetfoodforsometime。
Thereadingaloudoftensenthimtosleep,andheusedtoregretlosingpartsofanovel,formymotherwentsteadilyonlestthecessationofthesoundmightwakehim。Hecamedownatfouro’clocktodressforhiswalk,andhewassoregularthatonemightbequitecertainitwaswithinafewminutesoffourwhenhisdescendingstepswereheard。
>Fromabouthalf—pastfourtohalf—pastfiveheworked;thenhecametothedrawing—room,andwasidletillitwastime(aboutsix)togoupforanotherrestwithnovel—readingandacigarette。
Latterlyhegaveuplatedinner,andhadasimpleteaathalf—pastseven(whilewehaddinner),withaneggorasmallpieceofmeat。Afterdinnerheneverstayedintheroom,andusedtoapologisebysayinghewasanoldwoman,whomustbeallowedtoleavewiththeladies。Thiswasoneofthemanysignsandresultsofhisconstantweaknessandill—health。Halfanhourmoreorlessconversationwouldmaketohimthedifferenceofasleeplessnight,andofthelossperhapsofhalfthenextday’swork。
Afterdinnerheplayedbackgammonwithmymother,twogamesbeingplayedeverynight;formanyyearsascoreofthegameswhicheachwonwaskept,andinthisscorehetookthegreatestinterest。Hebecameextremelyanimatedoverthesegames,bitterlylamentinghisbadluckandexplodingwithexaggeratedmock—angeratmymother’sgoodfortune。
Afterbackgammonhereadsomescientificbooktohimself,eitherinthedrawing—room,or,ifmuchtalkingwasgoingon,inthestudy。
Intheevening,thatis,afterhehadreadasmuchashisstrengthwouldallow,andbeforethereadingaloudbegan,hewouldoftenlieonthesofaandlistentomymotherplayingthepiano。Hehadnotagoodear,yetinspiteofthishehadatrueloveoffinemusic。Heusedtolamentthathisenjoymentofmusichadbecomedulledwithage,yetwithinmyrecollection,hisloveofagoodtunewasstrong。Ineverheardhimhummorethanonetune,theWelshsong"Arhydynos,"whichhewentthroughcorrectly;heusedalso,Ibelieve,tohumalittleOtaheitansong。Fromhiswantofearhewasunabletorecognizeatunewhenhehearditagain,butheremainedconstanttowhatheliked,andwouldoftensay,whenanoldfavouritewasplayed,"That’safinething;whatisit?"HelikedespeciallypartsofBeethoven’ssymphonies,andbitsofHandel。Hemadealittlelistofallthepieceswhichheespeciallylikedamongthosewhichmymotherplayed——