"Assoonasyouweregone，sir，Icarriedoutyourinstructions，andhelpedthepoordevilofasentrytoemptyhisbottle，thoughhewouldhavewillinglydispensedwithmyassistanceinthematter；I
thentoldhimyouhadgonetobed，andhelockedthedoorasusual，andwentawayaftershakingmebythehand。AfterhehadgoneIwenttobed。Nextmorningtheworthymanwasathispostbynineo’clock，andattenthethreeofficerscame，andonmytellingthemthatyouwerestillasleeptheywentaway，biddingmecometoacoffee—house，andsummonthemwhenyougotup。Astheywaitedandwaitedtonopurpose，theycameagainatnoon，andtoldthesoldiertoopenthedoor。Whatfollowedamusedme，thoughIwasinsomedangerinthemidstoftherascals。
"Theywentin，andtakingthewig—blockforyourheadtheycameuptothebedandpolitelywishedyougoodmorning。Youtooknonotice，sooneofthemproceededtogiveyouagentleshake，andthebaublefellandrolledalongthefloor。Iroaredwithlaughteratthesightoftheiramazement。
"’Youlaugh，doyou，rascal？Telluswhereyourmasteris。’Andtogiveemphasistotheirwordstheyaccompaniedthemwithsomestrokesofthecane。
"Iwasnotgoingtostandthissortofthing，soItoldthem，withanoath，thatiftheydidnotstopIshoulddefendmyself，addingthatI
wasnotmymaster’skeeper，andadvisingthemtoaskthesentry。
"Thesentryonhispartsworebyallthesaintsthatyoumusthaveescapedbythewindow，butinspiteofthisacorporalwassummoned，andthepoormanwassenttoprison。
"Theclamourthatwasgoingonbroughtupthelandlord，whoopenedyourmails，andonfindingthememptysaidthathewouldbewellenoughpaidbyyourpostchaise，replyingonlywithagrintotheofficerwhopretendedyouhadgivenithim。
"Inthemidstofthetumultasuperiorofficercameup，whodecidedthatyoumusthaveescapedthroughthewindow，andorderedthesentrytobesetatlibertyonthespot。Thencamemyturn，for，asIkeptonlaughingandansweredallquestionsby’Idon’tknow，’thesegentlemanhadmetakentoprison，tellingmeIshouldstaytheretillIinformedthemwhereyou，oratleastyoureffects，couldbefound。
"Thenextdayoneofthemcametotheprison，andtoldmethatunlessIconfessedIshouldundoubtedlybesenttothegalleys。
"’OnthefaithofaSpaniard，’Ianswered，Iknownothing，butifI
diditwouldbeallthesametoyou，fornoonecanmakeanhonestservantbetrayhismaster。
"Atthistherascaltoldtheturnkeytogivemeatasteofthelash，andafterthishadbeendoneIwassetatliberty。
"Mybackwassomewhatscarified，butIhadtheproudconsciousnessofhavingdonemyduty，andIwentbackandsleptattheinn，wheretheyweregladtoseeme。Nextmorningeveryoneknewyouwerehereandhadsentachallengetothethreesharpers，buttheuniversalopinionwasthattheyweretooknowingtorisktheirlivesbymeetingyou。
Nevertheless，MadameBalettitoldmetobegyoutoleaveFurstenburg，astheymightverylikelyhaveyouassassinated。ThelandlordsoldyourchaiseandyourmailstotheAustrianambassador，who，theysay，letyouescapefromawindowintheapartmentoccupiedbyhismistress。Nooneofferedtopreventmecominghere:
ThreehoursafterLeDuc’sarrivalItookpostandwenttoSchaffhaus，andfromtheretoZurich，withhiredhorses，astherearenopostsinSwitzerland。AtZurichIputupatthe"Sward，"anexcellentinn。
Aftersupper，powderingovermyarrivalinZurichwhereIhaddroppedfromthecloudsasitwere，Ibegan，toreflectseriouslyuponmypresentsituationandtheeventsofmypastlife。Irecalledmymisfortunesandscrutinizedmyconduct；andwasnotlonginconcludingthatallIhadsufferedwasthroughmyownfault，andthatwhenfortunewouldhavecrownedmewithhappinessIhadpersistentlytrifledthathappinessaway。IhadjustsucceededinescapingfromatrapwhereImighthaveperished，oratleasthavebeenoverwhelmedwithshame，andIshudderedatthethought。Iresolvedtobenomorefortune’splaything，buttoescapeentirelyfromherhands。I
calculatedmyassetsandfoundIwaspossessedofahundredthousandcrowns。"Withthat，"saidI，"Icanlivesecureamidstthechangesandchancesofthislife，andIshallatlastexperiencetruehappiness。"
Iwenttobedponderingoverthesefancies，andmysleepwasfullofhappydreams。Isawmyselfdwellinginaretiredspotamidstpeaceandplenty。IthoughtIwassurroundedonallsidesbyafairexpanseofcountrywhichbelongedtome，whereIenjoyedthatfreedomtheworldcannotgive。Mydreamshadalltheforceofreality，tillasuddenawakeningatday—breakcametogivethemthelie。ButtheimaginaryblissIhadenjoyedhadsotakenmyfancythatIcouldnotresttillIrealizedit。Iarose，dressedmyselfhastily，andwentout，fasting，withoutknowingwhereIwasgoing。
Iwalkedonandon，absorbedincontemplation，anddidnotreallyawaketillIfoundmyselfinaravinebetweentwoloftymountains。
SteppingforwardIreachedavalleysurroundedbymountainsonallsides，andinthedistanceafinechurch，attachedtoapileofbuildings，magnificentlysituated。Iguessedittobeamonastery，andImademywaytowardsit。
Thechurchdoorwasopen，andIwentinandwasamazedattherichmarblesandthebeautyofthealtars；and，afterhearingthelastmass，IwenttothesacristyandfoundmyselfinacrowdofBenedictines。
Theabbot，whomIrecognizedbyhiscross，cametowardsmeandaskedifIwishedtoseethechurchandmonastery。IrepliedthatIshouldbedelighted，andhe，withtwootherbrethren，offeredtoshewmeall。Isawtheirrichornaments，chasublesembroideredwithgoldandpearls，thesacredvesselsadornedwithdiamondsandotherpreciousstones，arichbalustrade，etc。
AsIunderstoodGermanveryimperfectlyandtheSwissdialect（whichishardtoacquireandbearsthesamerelationtoGermanthatGenoesehastoItalian）notatall，IbegantospeakLatin，andaskedtheabbotifthechurchhadbeenbuiltforlong。Thereupontheveryreverendfatherenteredintoalonghistory，whichwouldhavemademerepentmyinquisitivenessifhehadnotfinishedbysayingthatthechurchwasconsecratedbyJesusChristHimself。Thiswascarryingitsfoundationratherfarback，andnodoubtmyfaceexpressedsomesurprise，fortoconvincemeofthetruthofthestorytheabbotbademefollowhimintothechurch，andthereonapieceofmarblepavementheshewedmetheimprintofthefootofJesus，whichHehadleftthereatthemomentoftheconsecration，toconvincetheinfidelsandtosavethebishopthetroubleofconsecratingthechurch。
Theabbothadhadthisdivinelyrevealedtohiminadream，andgoingintothechurchtoverifythevisionhesawtheprintoftheDivineFoot，andgavethankstotheLord。
EndMEMOIRSOFJACQUESCASANOVAdeSEINGALT1725—1798
THEETERNALQUEST，Volume3d——SWITZERLAND
THERAREUNABRIDGEDLONDONEDITIONOF1894TRANSLATEDBYARTHUR
MACHENTOWHICHHASBEENADDEDTHECHAPTERSDISCOVERED
BYARTHURSYMONS。
THEETERNALQUEST
SWITZERLAND
CHAPTERXIII
IResolvetoBecomeaMonk——IgotoConfession——DelayofaFortnight——Giustiniani，theApostleCapuchin——IAltermyMind；MyReasons——MyPranksattheInn——IDineWiththeAbbotThecoolwayinwhichtheabbottoldthesecock—and—bullstoriesgavemeaninclinationtolaughter，whichtheholinessoftheplaceandthelawsofpolitenesshadmuchdifficultyinrestraining。AllthesameIlistenedwithsuchanattentiveairthathisreverencewasdelightedwithmeandaskedwhereIwasstaying。
"Nowhere，"saidI；"IcamefromZurichonfoot，andmyfirstvisitwastoyourchurch。"
IdonotknowwhetherIpronouncedthesewordswithanairofcompunction，buttheabbotjoinedhishandsandliftedthemtoheaven，asiftothankGodfortouchingmyheartandbringingmetheretolaydowntheburdenofmysins。Ihavenodoubtthatthesewerehisthoughts，asIhavealwayshadthelookofagreatsinner。
TheabbotsaiditwasnearnoonandthathehopedIwoulddohimthehonourofdiningwithhim，andIacceptedwithpleasure，forIhadhadnothingtoeatandIknewthatthereisusuallygoodcheerinsuchplaces。IdidnotknowwhereIwasandIdidnotcaretoask，beingwillingtoleavehimundertheimpressionthatIwasapilgrimcometoexpiatemysins。
Onourwayfromthechurchtheabbottoldmethathismonkswerefasting，butthatweshouldeatmeatinvirtueofadispensationhehadreceivedfromBenedictXIV。，whichallowedhimtoeatmeatalltheyearroundwithhisguests。IrepliedthatIwouldjoinhimallthemorewillinglyastheHolyFatherhadgivenmeasimilardispensation。Thisseemedtoexcitehiscuriosityaboutmyself，andwhenwegottohisroom，whichdidnotlookthecellofapenitent，hehastenedtoshewmethebrief，whichhehadframedandglazedandhungupoppositethetablesothatthecuriousandscrupulousmighthaveitinfullview。
Asthetablewasonlylaidfortwo，aservantinfullliverycameinandbroughtanothercover；andthehumbleabbotthentoldmethatheusuallyhadhischancellorwithhimatdinner，"for，"saidhe，"I
haveachancery，sinceasabbotofOurLadyofEinsiedelIamaprinceoftheHolyRomanEmpire。"
Thiswasarelieftome，asInowknewwhereIwas，andInolongerrantheriskofshewingmyignoranceinthecourseofconversation。
Thismonastery（ofwhichIhadheardbefore）wastheLorettooftheMountains，andwasfamousforthenumberofpilgrimswhoresortedtoit。
Inthecourseofdinnertheprince——abbotaskedmewhereIcamefrom，ifIweremarried，ifIintendedtomakeatourofSwitzerland，addingthatheshouldbegladtogivemelettersofintroduction。
IrepliedthatIwasaVenetian，abachelor，andthatIshouldbegladtoacceptthelettersofintroductionhehadkindlyofferedme，afterIhadhadaprivateconferencewithhim，inwhichIdesiredtotakehisadviceonmyconscience。
Thus，withoutpremeditation，andscarcelyknowingwhatIwassaying，Iengagedtoconfesstotheabbot。
Thiswasmyway。WheneverIobeyedaspontaneousimpulse，wheneverI
didanythingofasudden，IthoughtIwasfollowingthelawsofmydestiny，andyieldingtoasupremewill。WhenIhadthusplainlyintimatedtohimthathewastobemyconfessor，hefeltobligedtospeakwithreligiousfervour，andhisdiscoursesseemedtolerableenoughduringadelicateandappetisingrepast，forwehadsnipeandwoodcock；whichmademeexclaim，——
"What！gamelikethatatthistimeofyear？"
"It’sasecret，"saidhe，withapleasedsmile，"whichIshallbegladtocommunicatetoyou。"
Theabbotwasamanoftaste，forthoughheaffectedsobrietyhehadthechoicestwinesandthemostdeliciousdishesonthetable。A
splendidsalmon—troutwasbrought，whichmadehimsmilewithpleasure，andseasoningthegoodfarewithajest，hesaidinLatinthatwemusttasteitasitwasfish，andthatitwasrighttofastalittle。
Whilehewastalkingtheabbotkeptakeeneyeonme，andasmyfinedressmadehimfeelcertainthatIhadnothingtoaskofhimhespokeatease。
Whendinnerwasoverthechancellorbowedrespectfullyandwentout。
Soonaftertheabbottookmeoverthemonastery，includingthelibrary，whichcontainedaportraitoftheElectorofCologneinsemi—ecclesiasticalcostume。Itoldhimthattheportraitwasagoodthoughuglylikeness，anddrewoutofmypocketthegoldsnuffboxtheprincehadgivenme，tellinghimthatitwasaspeakinglikeness。Helookedatitwithinterest，andthoughthishighnesshaddonewelltobetakeninthedressofagrand—master。ButIperceivedthattheeleganceofthesnuff—boxdidnoharmtotheopiniontheabbothadconceivedofme。Asforthelibrary，ifIhadbeenaloneitwouldhavemademeweep。Itcontainednothingunderthesizeoffolio，thenewestbookswereahundredyearsold，andthesubject—matterofallthesehugebookswassolelytheologyandcontroversy。TherewereBibles，commentators，theFathers，worksoncanonlawinGerman，volumesofannals，andHoffman’sdictionary。
"Isupposeyourmonkshaveprivatelibrariesoftheirown，"Isaid，"whichcontainaccountsoftravels，withhistoricalandscientificworks。"
"Notatall，"hereplied；"mymonksarehonestfolk，whoarecontenttodotheirduty，andtoliveinpeaceandsweetignorance。"
Idonotknowwhathappenedtomeatthatmoment，butastrangewhimcameintomyhead——Iwouldbeamonk，too。Isaidnothingaboutitatthemoment，butIbeggedtheabbottotakemetohisprivatechamber。
"Iwishtomakeageneralconfessionofallmysins，"saidI，"thatI
mayobtainthebenefitofabsolution，andreceivetheHolyEucharistonthemorrow。"
Hemadenoanswer，butledthewaytoaprettylittleroom，andwithoutrequiringmetokneeldownsaidhewasreadytohearme。
IsatdownbeforehimandforthreeconsecutivehoursInarratedscandaloushistoriesunnumerable，which，however，Itoldsimplyandnotspicily，sinceIfeltasceticallydisposedandobligedmyselftospeakwithacontritionIdidnotfeel，forwhenIrecountedmyfolliesIwasveryfarfromfindingtheremembranceofthemdisagreeable。
Inspiteofthat，thesereneorreverendabbotbelieved，atallevents，inmyattrition，forhetoldmethatsincebytheappointedmeansIhadoncemoreplacedmyselfinastateofgrace，contritionwouldbeperfectedinme。
Accordingtothegoodabbot，andstillmoreaccordingtome，withoutgracecontritionisimpossible。
Afterhehadpronouncedthesacramentalwordswhichtakeawaythesinsofmen，headvisedmetoretiretothechamberhehadappointedforme，topasstherestofthedayinprayer，andtogotobedatanearlyhour，butheaddedthatIcouldhavesupperifIwasaccustomedtothatmeal。HetoldmethatImightcommunicateatthefirstmassnextmorning，andwiththatweparted。
Iobeyedwithadocilitywhichhaspuzzledmeeversince，butatthetimeIthoughtnothingofit。IwasleftaloneinaroomwhichIdidnotevenexamine，andthereIponderedovertheideawhichhadcomeintomyheadbeforemakingmyconfession；andIquitemadeupmymindthatchance，orrathermygoodgenius，hadledmetothatspot，wherehappinessawaitedme，andwhereImightshelterallmydaysfromthetempestsoftheworld。
"WhetherIstayhere，"saidI，"dependsonmyselfalone，asIamsuretheabbotwillnotrefusemethecowlifIgivehimtenthousandcrownsformysupport。"
Allthatwasneededtosecuremyhappinessseemedalibraryofmyownchoosing，andIdidnotdoubtbutthattheabbotwouldletmehavewhatbooksIpleasedifIpromisedtoleavethemtothemonasteryaftermydeath。
Astothesocietyofthemonks，thediscord，envy，andallthebickeringsinseparablefromsuchamodeoflife，IthoughtIhadnothingtopassinthatway，sinceIhadnoambitionswhichcouldrousethejealousyoftheothermonks。Nevertheless，despitemyfascination，Iforesawthepossibilityofrepentance，andIshudderedatthethought，butIhadacureforthatalso。
"WhenIaskforthehabit，"Isaid，"Iwillalsoaskthatmynovitiatebeextendedfortenyears，andifrepentancedonotcomeintenyearsitwillnotcomeatall。IshalldeclarethatIdonotwishforanycureoranyecclesiasticaldignity。AllIwantispeaceandleavetofollowmyowntastes，withoutscandalisinganyone。"
Ithought:Icouldeasilyremoveanyobjectionswhichmightbemadetothelongtermofmynovitiate，byagreeing，incaseIchangedmymind，toforfeitthetenthousandcrownswhichIwouldpayinadvance。
IputdownthisfineideainwritingbeforeIwenttobed；andinthemorning，findingmyselfunshakeninmyresolve，afterIhadcommunicatedIgavemyplantotheabbot，whowastakingchocolateinhisroom。
Heimmediatelyreadmyplan，andwithoutsayinganythingputitonthetable，andafterbreakfasthewalkedupanddowntheroomandreaditagain，andfinallytoldmethathewouldgivemeananswerafterdinner。
Iwaitedtillnightwiththeimpatienceofachildwhohasbeenpromisedtoysonitsbirthday——socompletelyandsuddenlycananinfatuationchangeone’snature。Wehadasgoodadinnerasonthedaybefore，andwhenwehadrisenfromthetablethegoodabbotsaid，"MycarriageisatthedoortotakeyoutoZurich。Go，andletmehaveafortnighttothinkitover。Iwillbringmyanswerinperson。
Inthemeanwhileherearetwosealedletters，whichpleasedeliveryourself。"
IrepliedthatIwouldobeyhisinstructionsandthatIwouldwaitforhimatthe"Sword，"inthehopethatbewoulddeigntograntmywishes。Itookhishand，whichheallowedmetokiss，andIthensetoutforZurich。
AssoonasmySpaniardsawmetherascalbegantolaugh。Iguessedwhathewasthinking，andaskedhimwhathewaslaughingat。
"IamamazedtoseethatnosoonerdoyouarriveinSwitzerlandthanyoucontrivetofindsomeamusementwhichkeepsyouawayfortwowholedays。"
"Ah，Isee；goandtellthelandlordthatIshallwanttheuseofagoodcarriageforthenextfortnight，andalsoaguideonwhomIcanrely。"
Mylandlord，whosenamewasOte，hadbeenacaptain，andwasthoughtagreatdealofatZurich。Hetoldmethatallthecarriagesintheneighbourhoodwereuncovered。Isaidtheywoulddo，astherewasnothingbettertobehad，andheinformedmeIcouldtrusttheservanthewouldprovidemewith。
NextmorningItooktheabbot’sletters。OnewasforM。OrelliandtheotherforaM。Pestalozzi，neitherofwhomIfoundathome；butintheafternoontheybothcalledonme，askedmetodinner，andmademepromisetocomewiththemthesameeveningtoaconcert。ThisistheonlyspeciesofentertainmentallowedatZurich，andonlymembersofthemusicalsocietycanbepresent，withtheexceptionofstrangers，whohavetobeintroducedbyamember，andarethenadmittedonthepaymentofacrown。ThetwogentlemenbothspokeinveryhightermsoftheAbbotofEinsiedel。
Ithoughttheconcertabadone，andgotboredatit。Themensatontherighthandandthewomenontheleft。Iwasvexedwiththisarrangement，forinspiteofmyrecentconversationIsawthreeorfourladieswhopleasedme，andwhoseeyeswanderedagooddealinmydirection。Ishouldhavelikedtomakelovetothem，tomakethebestofmytimebeforeIbecameamonk。
Whentheconcertwasover，menandwomenwentouttogether，andthetwocitizenspresentedmetotheirwivesanddaughters，wholookedpleasant，andwereamongstthoseIhadnoticed。
Courtesyisnecessarilycutshortinthestreet，and，afterIhadthankedthetwogentlemen，Iwenthometothe"Sword。"
NextdayIdinedwithM。Orelli，andIhadanopportunityfordoingjusticetohisdaughter’samiabilitywithoutbeingabletoletherperceivehowshehadimpressedme。Thedayafter，IplayedthesamepartwithM。Pestalozzi，althoughhischarmingdaughterwasprettyenoughtoexcitemygallantry。ButtomyowngreatastonishmentI
wasamirrorofdiscretion，andinfourdaysthatwasmycharacteralloverthetown。Iwasquiteastonishedtofindmyselfaccostedinquitearespectfulmanner，towhichIwasnotaccustomed；butinthepiousstateofmindIwasin，thisconfirmedmeinthebeliefthatmyideaoftakingthecowlhadbeenaDivineinspiration。Nevertheless，Ifeltlistlessandweary，butIlookeduponthatastheinevitableconsequenceofsocompleteachangeoflife，andthoughtitwoulddisappearwhenIgrewmoreaccustomedtogoodness。
Inordertoputmyself，assoonaspossible，onanequalitywithmyfuturebrethren，IpassedthreehourseverymorninginlearningGerman。Mymasterwasanextraordinaryman，anativeofGenoa，andanapostateCapuchin。HisnamewasGiustiniani。Thepoorman，towhomIgavesixfrancseverymorning，lookeduponmeasanangelfromheaven，althoughI，withtheenthusiasmofadevotee，tookhimforadevilofhell，forhelostnoopportunityofthrowingastoneatthereligiousorders。Thoseorderswhichhadthehighestreputation，were，accordingtohim，theworstofall，sincetheyledmorepeopleastray。Hestyledmonksingeneralasavilerabble，thecurseofthehumanrace。
"But，"saidItohimoneday，"youwillconfessthatOurLadyofEinsiedel……"
"What！"repliedtheGenoese，withoutlettingmefinishmyremark，"doyouthinkIshouldmakeanexceptioninfavourofasetoffortyignorant，lazy，vicious，idle，hypocriticalscoundrelswholivebadlivesunderthecloakofhumility，andeatupthehousesofthepoorsimpletonswhoprovideforthem，whentheyoughttobeearningtheirownbread？"
"Buthowabouthisreverendhighnesstheabbot？"
"Astuck—uppeasantwhoplaysthepartofaprince，andisfoolenoughtothinkhimselfone。"
"Butheisaprince。"
"AsmuchaprinceasIam。Ilookuponhimasamerebuffoon。"
"Whathashedonetoyou？"
"Nothing；butheisamonk。"
"Heisafriendofmine。"
"IcannotretractwhatIhavesaid，butIbegyourpardon。"
ThisGiustinianihadagreatinfluenceuponme，althoughIdidnotknowit，forIthoughtmyvocationwassure。ButmyideaofbecomingamonkatEinsiedelcametoanendasfollows:
Thedaybeforetheabbotwascomingtoseeme，ataboutsixo’clockintheevening，Iwassittingatmywindow，whichlookedoutonthebridge，andgazingatthepassers—by，whenallatonceacarriageandfourcameupatagoodpaceandstoppedattheinn。Therewasnofootmanonit，andconsequentlythewaitercameoutandopenedthedoor，andIsawfourwell—dressedwomenleavethecarriage。InthefirstthreeIsawnothingnoticeable，butthefourth，whowasdressedinariding—habit，struckmeatoncewithhereleganceandbeauty。
Shewasabrunettewithfineandwell—seteyes，archedeyebrows，andacomplexioninwhichthehuesofthelilyandtheroseweremingled。
Herbonnetwasofbluesatinwithasilverfillet，whichgaveheranairIcouldnotresist。IstretchedoutfromthewindowasfarasI
could，andsheliftedhereyesandlookedatmeasifIhadbadeherdoso。Mypositionobligedmetolookatherforhalfaminute；toomuchforamodestwoman，andmorethanwasrequiredtosetmeallablaze。
Iranandtookupmypositionatthewindowofmyante—chamber，whichcommandedaviewofthestaircase，andbeforelongIsawherrunningbytorejoinherthreecompanions。Whenshegotoppositetomywindowshechancedtoturninthatdirection，andonseeingmecriedoutasifshehadseenaghost；butshesoonrecollectedherselfandranaway，laughinglikeamadcap，andrejoinedtheotherladieswhowerealreadyintheirroom。
Reader，putyourselfinmyplace，andtellmehowIcouldhaveavoidedthismeeting。Andyouwhowouldburyyourselvesinmonasticshades，persevere，ifyoucan，afteryouhaveseenwhatIsawatZurichonApril23rd。
IwasinsuchastateofexcitementthatIhadtoliedownonmybed。
Afterrestingafewminutes，Igotupandalmostunconsciouslywenttowardsthepassagewindowandsawthewaitercomingoutoftheladies’room。
"Waiter，"saidI，"Iwilltakesupperinthedining—roomwitheverybodyelse。"
"Ifyouwanttoseethoseladies，thatwon’tdo，astheyhaveorderedtheirsuppertobebroughtuptothem。Theywanttogotobedingoodtimeastheyaretoleaveatday—break。"
"Wherearetheygoing？"
"ToOurLadyofEinsiedeltopaytheirvows。"
"Wheredotheycomefrom？"
"FromSoleure。"
"Whataretheirnames？"
"Idon’tknow。"
Iwenttoliedownagain，andthoughthowIcouldapproachthefaironeofmythoughts。ShouldIgotoEinsiedel，too？ButwhatcouldI
dowhenIgotthere？Theseladiesaregoingtomaketheirconfessions；Icouldnotgetintotheconfessional。WhatkindofafigureshouldIcutamongthemonks？AndifIweretomeettheabbotontheway，howcouldIhelpreturningwithhim？IfIhadhadatrustyfriendIwouldhavearrangedanambuscadeandcarriedoffmycharmer。Itwouldhavebeenaneasytask，asshehadnobodytodefendher。WhatifIweretopluckupmyheartandbegthemtoletmesupintheircompany？Iwasafraidofthethreedevotees；I
shouldmeetwitharefusal。Ijudgedthatmycharmer’sdevotionwasmoreamatterofformthananythingelse，asherphysiognomydeclaredhertobealoverofpleasure，andIhadlongbeenaccustomedtoreadwomens’charactersbytheplayoftheirfeatures。
Ididnotknowwhichwaytoturn，whenahappyideacameintomyhead。Iwenttothepassagewindowandstayedtheretillthewaiterwentby。Ihadhimintotheroom，andbeganmydiscoursebyslidingapieceofgoldintohishand。Ithenaskedhimtolendmehisgreenapron，asIwishedtowaitupontheladiesatsupper。
"Whatareyoulaughingat？"
"Atyourtakingsuchafancy，sir，thoughIthinkIknowwhy。"
"Youareasharpfellow。"
"Yes，sir，assharpasmostofthem；Iwillgetyouanewapron。Theprettyoneaskedmewhoyouwere。"
"Whatdidyoutellher？"
"IsaidyouwereanItalian；that’sall。"
"IfyouwillholdyourtongueIwilldoublethatpieceofgold。"
"IhaveaskedyourSpaniardtohelpme，sir，asIamsingle—handed，andsupperhastobeservedatthesametimebothupstairsanddownstairs。"
"Verygood；buttherascalmustn’tcomeintotheroomorhewouldbesuretolaugh。Lethimgotothekitchen，bringupthedishes，andleavethemoutsidethedoor。"
Thewaiterwentout，andreturnedsoonafterwiththeapronandLeDuc，towhomIexplainedinallseriousnesswhathehadtodo。Helaughedlikeamadman，butassuredmehewouldfollowmydirections。
Iprocuredacarving—knife，tiedmyhairinaqueue，tookoffmycoat，andputontheapronovermyscarletwaistcoatornamentedwithgoldlace。Ithenlookedatmyselfintheglass，andthoughtmyappearancemeanenoughforthemodestpartIwasabouttoplay。I
wasdelightedattheprospect，andthoughttomyselfthatastheladiescamefromSoleuretheywouldspeakFrench。
LeDuccametotellmethatthewaiterwasgoingupstairs。Iwentintotheladies’roomandsaid，"Supperisabouttobeserved，ladies。"
"Makehasteaboutit，then，"saidtheugliestofthem，"aswehavegottorisebeforeday—break。"
Iplacedthechairsroundthetableandglancedatmyfairone，wholookedpetrified。Thewaitercamein，andIhelpedhimtoputthedishesonthetable，andhethensaidtome，"Doyoustayhere，asI
havetogodownstairs。"
Itookaplateandstoodbehindachairfacingthelady，andwithoutappearingtolookatherIsawherperfectly，orratherIsawnothingelse。Shewasastonishedtheothersdidnotgivemeaglance，andtheycouldnothavepleasedmebetter。AfterthesoupIhurriedtochangeherplate，andthendidthesameofficefortherest:theyhelpedthemselvestotheboiledbeef。
Whiletheywereeating，Itookaboiledcaponandcutitupinamasterlymanner。
"Wehaveawaiterwhoknowshiswork，"saidtheladyofmythoughts。
"Haveyoubeenlongatthisinn？"
"Onlyafewweeks，madam。"
"Youwaitverywell。"
"Madamisverygood。"
IhadtuckedinmysuperbrufflesofEnglishpointlace，butmyfrilledshirtfrontofthesamematerialprotrudedslightlythroughmyvest，whichIhadnotbuttonedcarefully。Shesawit，andsaid，"Comehereamoment。"
"Whatdoesmadamrequire？"
"Letmeseeit。Whatbeautifullace！"
"SoIhavebeentold，madam，butitisveryold。AnItaliangentlemanwhowasstayingheremademeapresentofit。"
"Youhaverufflesofthesamekind，Isuppose？"
"Yes，madam；"andsosayingIstretchedoutmyhand，unbuttoningmywaistcoat。Shegentlydrewouttheruffle，andseemedtoplaceherselfinapositiontointoxicatemewiththesightofhercharms，althoughshewastightlylaced。Whatanecstaticmoment！Iknewshehadrecognizedme，andthethoughtthatIcouldnotcarrythemasqueradebeyondacertainpointwasaveritabletormenttome。
Whenshehadlookedalongtime，oneoftheotherssaid，"Youarecertainlyverycurious，mydear，onewouldthinkyouhadneverseenlacebefore。"
Atthissheblushed。
Whenthesupperwasdone，thethreeuglyladieseachwentaparttoundress，whileItookawaythedishes，andmyheroinebegantowrite。
IconfessthatIwasalmostinfatuatedenoughtothinkthatshewaswritingtome；however，Ihadtoohighanopinionofhertoentertaintheidea。
AssoonasIhadtakenawaythedishes，Istoodbythedoorintherespectfulmannerbecomingtheoccasion。
"Whatareyouwaitingfor？"shesaid。
"Foryourorders，madam。"
"Thankyou，Idon’twantanything。"
"Yourboots，madam，youwilllikethemremovedbeforeyouretire。"
"True，butstillIdon’tliketogiveyousomuchtrouble。"
"Iamheretoattendonyou，madam。"
Sosaying，Ikneltononekneebeforeher，andslowlyunplacedherbootswhileshecontinuedwriting。Iwentfarther；Iunbuckledhergarters，delightinginthecontemplationandstillmoreinthetouchofherdelicately—shapedlegs，buttoosoonformesheturnedherhead，andsaid，"Thatwilldo，thankyou。Ididnotnoticethatyouweregivingyourselfsomuchtrouble。Weshallseeyouto—morrowevening。"
"Thenyouwillsuphere，ladies？"
"Certainly。"
Itookherbootsaway，andaskedifIshouldlockthedoor。
"No，mygoodfellow，"saidshe，inthevoiceofasyren，"leavethekeyinside。"
LeDuctookthecharmer’sbootsfromme，andsaid，laughing，——
"Shehascaughtyou。"
"What？"
"Isawitall，sir，youplayedyourpartaswellasanyactorinParis；andIamcertainthatshewillgiveyoualouisto—morrow，butifyoudon’thanditovertomeIwillblowonthewholething。"
"That’senough，yourascal；getmemysupperasquicklyaspossible。"
Sucharethepleasureswhicholdagenolongerallowsmetoenjoy，exceptinmymemory。Therearemonsterswhopreachrepentance，andphilosopherswhotreatallpleasuresasvanity。Letthemtalkon。
Repentanceonlybefitscrimes，andpleasuresarerealities，thoughalltoofleeting。
Ahappydreammademepassthenightwiththefairlady；doubtlessitwasadelusion，butadelusionfullofbliss。WhatwouldInotgivenowforsuchdreams，whichmademynightssosweet！
Nextmorningatday—breakIwasatherdoorwithherbootsinmyhandjustastheircoachmancametocallthem。Iaskedthem，asamatterofform，iftheywouldhavebreakfast，andtheyrepliedmerrilythattheyhadmadetoogoodasuppertohaveanyappetiteatsuchanearlyhour。Iwentoutoftheroomtogivethemtimetodress，butthedoorwashalfopen，andIsawreflectedintheglassthesnow—whitebosomofmyfairone；itwasanintoxicatingsight。Whenshehadlacedherselfandputonherdressshecalledforherboots。IaskedifIshouldputthemon，towhichsheconsentedwithagoodgrace，andasshehadgreenvelvetbreeches，sheseemedtoconsiderherselfasalmostaman。And，afterall，awaiterisnotworthputtingone’sselfoutabout。Alltheworstforhimifhedareconceiveanyhopesfromthetriflingconcessionshereceives。Hispunishmentwillbesevere，forwhowouldhavethoughthecouldhavepresumedsofar？
Asforme，Iamnow，sadtosay，grownold，andenjoysomefewprivilegesofthisdescription，whichIrelish，thoughdespisingmyself，andstillmorethosewhothusindulgeme。
AftershehadgoneIwenttosleepagain，hopingtoseeherintheevening。WhenIawokeIheardthattheabbotofEinsiedelwasatZurich，andmylandlordtoldmethathisreverendhighnesswoulddinewithmeinmyroom。ItoldhimthatIwishedtotreattheabbotwell，andthathemustsetthebestdinnerhecouldforus。
Atnoontheworthyprelatewasshewnuptomyroom，andbeganbycomplimentingmeonthegoodreputationIhadatZurich，sayingthatthismadehimbelievethatmyvocationwasarealone。
"Thefollowingdistich，"headded，"shouldnowbecomeyourmotto:
"Inveniportum。Spesetfortunavalete；
Nilmihivobiscumest:luditenunsalios。"
"ThatisatranslationoftwoversesfromEuripides，"Ianswered；
"but，mylord，theywillnotserveme，asIhavechangedmymindsinceyesterday。"
"Icongratulateyou，"saidhe，"andIhopeyouwillaccomplishallyourdesires。Imaytellyouconfidentiallythatitismucheasiertosaveone’ssoulintheworldwhereonecandogoodtoone’sneighbours，thanintheconvent，whereamandoesnogoodtohimselfnortoanyoneelse。"
ThiswasnotspeakinglikethehypocriteGuistinianihaddescribedtome；onthecontrary，itwasthelanguageofagoodandsensibleman。
Wehadaprincelydinner，asmylandlordhadmadeeachofthethreecoursesaworkofart。Therepastwasenlivenedbyaninterestingconversation，towhichwitandhumourwerenotlacking。AftercoffeeIthankedtheabbotwiththegreatestrespect，andaccompaniedhimtohiscarriage，wherethereverendfatherreiteratedhisoffersofservingme，andthus，wellpleasedwithoneanother，weparted。
Thepresenceandtheconversationofthisworthypriesthadnotforamomentdistractedmythoughtsfromthepleasingobjectwithwhichtheywereoccupied。Sosoonastheabbothadgone，Iwenttothebridgetoawaittheblessedangel，whoseemedtohavebeensentfromSoleurewiththeexpresspurposeofdeliveringmefromthetemptationtobecomeamonk，whichthedevilhadputintomyheart。StandingonthebridgeIbuiltmanyafinecastleinSpain，andaboutsixintheeveningIhadthepleasureofseeingmyfairtravelleroncemore。I
hidmyselfsoastoseewithoutbeingseen。Iwasgreatlysurprisedtoseethemallfourlookingtowardsmywindow。Theircuriosityshewedmethattheladyhadtoldthemofthesecret，andwithmyastonishmenttherewassomeadmixtureofanger。Thiswasonlynatural，asInotonlysawmyselfdeprivedofthehopeofmakinganyfurtheradvances，butIfeltthatIcouldnolongerplaymypartofwaiterwithanyconfidence。InspiteofmylovefortheladyIwouldnotfortheworldbecomethelaughing—stockofherthreeplaincompanions。IfIhadinterestedherinmyfavour，shewouldcertainlynothavedivulgedmysecret，andIsawinherdoingsoproofpositivethatshedidnotwantthejesttogoanyfurther，orratherofherwantofthatspiritsonecessarytoensurethesuccessofanintrigue。Ifthethreecompanionsofmycharmerhadhadanythingattractiveaboutthem，Imightpossiblyhaveperseveredanddefiedmisfortune；butinthesamemeasureasbeautycheersmyheart，uglinessdepressesit。AnticipatingthemelancholywhichIforesawwouldresultfromthisdisappointment，Iwentoutwiththeideaofamusingmyself，andhappeningtomeetGiustinianiItoldhimofmymisfortune，sayingthatIshouldnotbesorrytomakeupforitbyacoupleofhoursofthesocietyofsomemercenarybeauty。
"Iwilltakeyoutoahouse，"saidhe，"whereyouwillfindwhatyouwant。Gouptothesecondfloorandyouwillbewellreceivedbyanoldwoman，ifyouwhispermynametoher。Idarenotaccompanyyou，asIamwellknowninthetownanditmightgetmeintotroublewiththepolice，whoareridiculouslystrictinthesematters。IndeedI
adviseyoutotakecarethatnobodyseesyougoingin。"
Ifollowedtheex—Capuchin’sadviceandwaitedfortheduskoftheevening。Ihadagoodreception，butthesupperwaspoor，andthehoursthatIspentwithtwoyounggirlsoftheworkingclassweretedious。Theywereprettyenough，butmyheadwasfullofmyperfidiouscharmer，andbesides，despitetheirneatnessandprettiness，theywerewantinginthatgracewhichaddssomanycharmstopleasure。Theliberalityofmypayment，towhichtheywerenotaccustomed，captivatedtheoldwoman，whosaidshewouldgetmeallthebeststuffinthetown；butshewarnedmetotakecarethatnobodysawmegoingintoherhouse。
WhenIgotbackLeDuctoldmethatIhadbeenwisetoslipaway，asmymasqueradehadbecomegenerallyknown，andthewholehouse，includingthelandlord，hadbeeneagerlywaitingtoseemeplaythepartofwaiter。"Itookyourplace，"headded。"TheladywhohastakenyourfancyisMadame————，andImustconfesssheisvastlyfine。"
"Didsheaskwheretheotherwaiterwas？"
"No，buttheotherladiesaskedwhathadbecomeofyouseveraltimes。"
"AndMadamesaidnothing？"
"Shedidn’topenhermouth，butlookedsadandseemedtocarefornothing，tillIsaidyouwereawaybecauseyouwereill。"
"Thatwasstupidofyou。Whydidyousaythat？"
"Ihadtosaysomething。"
"True。Didyouuntiehershoe？"
"No；shedidnotwantmetodoso。"
"Good。Whotoldyouhername？"
"Hercoachman。Sheisjustmarriedtoamanolderthanherself。"
Iwenttobed，butcouldonlythinkoftheindiscretionandsadnessofmyfairlady。Icouldnotreconcilethetwotraitsinhercharacter。Nextday，knowingthatshewouldbestartingearly，I
postedmyselfatthewindowtoseehergetintothecarriage，butI
tookcaretoarrangethecurtaininsuchawaythatIcouldnotbeseen。Madamewasthelasttogetin，andpretendingthatshewantedtoseeifitrained，shetookoffherbonnetandliftedherhead。
Drawingthecurtainwithonehand，andtakingoffmycapwiththeother，Iwaftedherakisswiththetipsofmyfingers。Inherturnshebowedgraciously，returningmykisswithagood—naturedsmile。
CHAPTERXIV
ILeaveZurich——ComicAdventureatBaden——Soleure——M。DeChavigni——
M。andMadame***IActinaPlay——ICounterfeitSicknesstoAttainHappinessM。Mote，mylandlord，introducedhistwosonstome。Hehadbroughtthemuplikeyoungprinces。InSwitzerland，aninn—keeperisnotalwaysamanofnoaccount。Therearemanywhoareasmuchrespectedaspeopleoffarhigherrankareinothercountries。Buteachcountryhasitsownmanners。Mylandlorddidthehonoursofthetable，andthoughtitnodegradationtomakehisguestspayforthemeal。Hewasright；theonlyreallydegradingthingintheworldisvice。ASwisslandlordonlytakesthechiefplaceattabletoseethateveryoneisproperlyattendedto。Ifhehaveason，hedoesnotsitdownwithhisfather，butwaitsontheguests，withnapkininhand。AtSchaffhaus，mylandlord’sson，whowasacaptainintheImperialarmy，stoodbehindmychairandchangedmyplate，whilehisfathersatattheheadofthetable。Anywhereelsethesonwouldhavebeenwaitedon，butinhisfather’shousehethought，andrightly，thatitwasanhonourtowait。
SuchareSwisscustoms，ofwhichpersonsofsuperficialunderstandingveryfoolishlymakeajest。Allthesame，thevauntedhonourandloyaltyoftheSwissdonotpreventthemfromfleecingstrangers，atleastasmuchastheDutch，butthegreenhornswholetthemselvesbecheated，learntherebythatitiswelltobargainbefore—hand，andthentheytreatonewellandchargereasonably。Inthisway，whenI
wasatBale，IbaffledthecelebratedImhoff，thelandlordofthe"ThreeKings。"
M。Otecomplimentedmeonmywaiter’sdisguise，andsaidhewassorrynottohaveseenmeofficiating，nevertheless，hesaidhethoughtI
waswisenottorepeatthejest。HethankedmeforthehonourIhaddonehishouse，andbeggedmetodohimtheadditionalfavourofdiningathistablesomedaybeforeIleft。IansweredthatIwoulddinewithhimwithpleasurethatveryday。Ididso，andwastreatedlikeaprince。
Thereaderwillhaveguessedthatthelastlookmycharmergavemehadnotextinguishedthefirewhichthefirstsightofherhadkindledinmybreast。Ithadratherincreasedmyflamebygivingmehopesofbeingbetteracquaintedwithher；inshort，itinspiredmewiththeideaofgoingtoSoleureinordertogiveahappyendingtotheadventure。ItookaletterofcreditonGeneva，andwrotetoMadamed’Urfe，begginghertogivemeawrittenintroduction，couchedinstrongtermstoM。deChavigni，theFrenchambassador，tellingherthattheinterestsofourorderwerehighlyinvolvedinmyknowingthisdiplomatist，andrequestinghertoaddressletterstomeatthepostofficeatSoleure。IalsowrotetotheDukeofWurtemburg，buthadnoanswerfromhim，andindeedhemusthavefoundmyepistleveryunpleasantreading。
IvisitedtheoldwomanwhomGiustinianihadtoldmeofseveraltimesbeforeIleftZurich，andalthoughIoughttohavebeenwellsatisfiedasfarasphysicalbeautywasconcerned，myenjoymentwasverylimited，asthenymphsIwooedonlyspokeSwissdialect——aruggedcorruptionofGerman。Ihavealwaysfoundthatlovewithoutspeechgiveslittleenjoyment，andIcannotimagineamoreunsatisfactorymistressthanamute，weresheaslovelyasVenusherself。
IhadscarcelyleftZurichwhenIwasobligedtostopatBadentohavethecarriageM。Otehadgotmemended。Imighthavestartedagainateleven，butonhearingthatayoungPolishladyonherwaytoOurLadyofEinseidelwastodineatthecommontable，Idecidedtowait；butIhadmytroublefornothing，assheturnedouttobequiteunworthyofthedelay。
Afterdinner，whilemyhorseswerebeingputin，thehost’sdaughter，aprettygirlenough，cameintotheroomandmademewaltzwithher；
itchancedtobeaSunday。Allatonceherfathercamein，andthegirlfled。
"Sir，"saidtherascal，"youarecondemnedtopayafineofonelouis。"
"Why？"
"Forhavingdancedonaholyday。"
"Getout；Iwon’tpay。"
"Youwillpay，though，"saidhe，shewingmeagreatparchmentcoveredwithwritingIdidnotunderstand。
"Iwillappeal。"
"Towhom，sir？"
"Tothejudgeoftheplace。"
Helefttheroom，andinaquarterofanhourIwastoldthatthejudgewaswaitingformeinanadjoiningchamber。Ithoughttomyselfthatthejudgeswereverypoliteinthatpartoftheworld，butwhenIgotintotheroomIsawtherascallyhostburiedinawigandgown。
"Sir，"saidhe，"Iamthejudge。"
"Judgeandplaintifftoo，asfarasIcansee。"
Hewroteinhisbook，confirmingthesentence，andmulctingmeinsixfrancsforthecostsofthecase。
"Butifyourdaughterhadnottemptedme。"saidI，"Ishouldnothavedanced；sheisthereforeasguiltyasI。"
"Verytrue，sir；hereisaLouisforher。"SosayinghetookaLouisoutofhispocket，putitintoadeskbesidehim，andsaid；"Nowyours。"
Ibegantolaugh，paidmyfine，andputoffmydeparturetillthemorrow。
AsIwasgoingtoLucerneIsawtheapostolicnuncio（whoinvitedmetodinner），andatFribourgComted’Afri’syoungandcharmingwife；
butattenleaguesfromSoleureIwasawitnessofthefollowingcuriouscircumstances。
Iwasstoppingthenightinavillage，andhadmadefriendswiththesurgeon，whomIhadfoundattheinn，andwhilesupper，whichhewastosharewithme，wasgettingready，wewalkedaboutthevillagetogether。Itwasintheduskoftheevening，andatadistanceofahundredpacesIsawamanclimbingupthewallofahouse，andfinallyvanishingthroughawindowonthefirstfloor。
"That’sarobber，"saidI，pointinghimouttothesurgeon。Helaughedandsaid，——
"Thecustommayastonishyou，butitisacommononeinmanypartsofSwitzerland。Themanyouhavejustseenisayoungloverwhoisgoingtopassthenightwithhisfuturebride。Nextmorninghewillleavemoreardentthanbefore，asshewillnotallowhimtogotoofar。Ifshewasweakenoughtoyieldtohisdesireshewouldprobablydeclinetomarryher，andshewouldfinditdifficulttogetmarriedatall。"
AtSoleureIfoundaletterfromMadamed’Urfe，withanenclosurefromtheDucdeChoiseultotheambassador，M。deChavigni。Itwassealed，buttheduke’snamewaswrittenbelowtheaddress。
ImadeaCourttoilet，tookacoach，andwenttocallontheambassador。Hisexcellencywasnotathome，soIleftmycardandtheletter。Itwasafeast—day，andIwenttohighmass，notsomuch，Iconfess，toseekforGodasformycharmer，butshewasnotthere。AfterserviceIwalkedaroundthetown，andonmyreturnfoundanofficerwhoaskedmetodinnerattheambassador’s。
Madamed’UrfesaidthatonthereceiptofmylettershehadgonestraightwaytoVersailles，andthatwiththehelpofMadamedeGrammontshehadgotmeanintroductionofthekindIwanted。Thiswasgoodnewsforme，asIdesiredtocutanimposingfigureatSoleure。Ihadplentyofmoney，andIknewthatthismagicmetalglitteredintheeyesofall。M。deChavignihadbeenambassadoratVenicethirtyyearsbefore，andIknewanumberofanecdotesabouthisadventuresthere，andIwaseagertoseewhatIcouldmakeoutofhim。
Iwenttohishouseatthetimeappointed，andfoundallhisservantsinfulllivery，whichIlookeduponasahappyomen。Mynamewasnotannounced，andIremarkedthatwhenIcameinbothsidesofthedoorwereopenedformebythepage。Afineoldmancameforwardtomeetme，andpayingmemanywell—turnedcomplimentsintroducedmetothosepresent。Then，withthedelicatetactofthecourtier，pretendingnottorecollectmyname，hedrewtheDucdeChoiseul’sletterfromhispocket，andreadaloudtheparagraphinwhichtheministerdesiredhimtotreatmewiththeutmostconsideration。Hemademesitonaneasychairathisrighthand，andaskedmequestionstowhichIcouldonlyanswerthatIwastravellingformypleasure，andthatIconsideredtheSwissnationtobeinmanyrespectssuperiortoallothernationswhatsoever。
Dinnerwasserved，andhisexcellencysetmeonhisrighthandinapositionofequalhonourtohisown。Weweresixteenincompany，andbehindeverychairstoodamagnificentlackeyintheambassador’slivery。InthecourseofconversationIgotanopportunityoftellingtheambassadorthathewasstillspokenofatVenicewiththeutmostaffection。
"Ishallalwaysremember，"hesaid，"thekindnesswithwhichtheVenetianstreatedme；buttellme，Ibeg，thenamesofthosegentlemenwhostillrememberme；theymustbequiteoldnow。"
ThiswaswhatIwaswaitingfor。M。deMalipierohadtoldmeofcertaineventswhichhadhappenedduringtheregency，andM。deBragadinhadinformedmeoftheambassador’samourswiththecelebratedStringhetta。
Hisexcellency’sfarewasperfect，butinthepleasureofconversingIforgotthatofeating。ItoldallmyanecdotessoracilythathisfeaturesexpressedthepleasureIwasaffordinghim，andwhenwerosefromthetableheshookmebythehand，andtoldmehehadnothadsoagreeableadinnersincehehadbeenatSoleure。
"TherecollectionofmyVenetiangallantries，"saidtheworthyoldman，"makesmerecallmanyahappymoment；Ifeelquiteyoungagain。"
Heembracedme，andbademeconsidermyselfasoneofhisfamilyduringmystayatSoleure。
AfterdinnerhetalkedagooddealaboutVenice，praisingtheGovernment，andsayingthattherewasnotatownintheworldwhereamancouldfarebetter，providedhetookcaretogetgoodoilandforeignwines。Aboutfiveo’clockheaskedmetocomeforadrivewithhim，gettingintothecarriagefirsttogivemethebestplace。
Wegotoutataprettycountryhousewhereiceswereservedtous。
Onourwaybackhesaidthathehadalargepartyeveryevening，andthathehopedIwoulddohimthehonourtobepresentwheneveritsuitedmyinclinations，assuringmethathewoulddohisbesttoamuseme。Iwasimpatienttotakepartintheassembly，asIfeltcertainIshouldseemycharmerthere。Itwasavainhope，however，forIsawseveralladies，someoldandugly，somepassable，butnotonepretty。
Cardswereproduced，andIsoonfoundmyselfatatablewithayoungladyoffaircomplexionandaplain—lookingwomanwelladvancedinyears，whoseemed，however，nottobedestituteofwit。ThoughIwaslooedIplayedon，andIlostfiveorsixhundredfishwithoutopeningmylips。Whenitcametoaprofitandlossaccount，theplainwomantoldmeIowedthreelouis。
"Threelouis，madam。"
"Yes，sir；wehavebeenplayingattwosousthefish。Youthought，perhaps，wewereplayingforfarthings。"
"Onthecontrary，Ithoughtitwasforfrancs，asIneverplaylower。"Shedidnotanswerthisboastofmine，butsheseemedannoyed。Onrejoiningthecompanyafterthiswearisomegame，I
proceededtoscrutinizealltheladiespresentrapidlybutkeenly，butIcouldnotseeherforwhomIlooked，andwasonthepointofleaving，whenIhappenedtonoticetwoladieswhowerelookingatmeattentively。Irecognizedthemdirectly。Theyweretwoofmyfairone’scompanions，whomIhadhadthehonourofwaitingonatZurich。
Ihurriedoff，pretendingnottorecognizethem。
Nextday，agentlemanintheambassador’ssuitecametotellmethathisexcellencywasgoingtocallonme。ItoldhimthatIwouldnotgoouttillIhadthehonourofreceivinghismaster，andIconceivedtheideaofquestioninghimconcerningthatwhichlaynexttomyheart。However，hesparedmethetrouble，asthereaderwillseeforhimself。
IgaveM。deChavignithebestreceptionIcould，andafterwehaddiscussedtheweatherhetoldme，withasmile，thathehadthemostridiculousaffairtobroachtome，beggingmetocredithimwhenhesaidthathedidnotbelieveitforamoment。
"Proceed，mylord。"
"Twoladieswhosawyouatmyhouseyesterdaytoldmeinconfidence，afteryouhadgone，thatIshoulddowelltobeonmyguard，asyouwerethewaiterinaninnatZurichwheretheyhadstayed。TheyaddedthattheyhadseentheotherwaiterbytheAar，andthatinallprobabilityyouhadrunawayfromtheinntogether；Godaloneknowswhy！Theysaid，furthermore，thatyouslippedawayfrommyhouseyesterdayassoonasyousawthem。ItoldthemthatevenifyouwerenotthebearerofaletterfromhisgracetheDucdeChoiseulI
shouldhavebeenconvincedthattheyweremistaken，andthattheyshoulddinewithyouto—day，iftheywouldacceptmyinvitation。I
alsohintedthatyoumighthavemerelydisguisedyourselfasawaiterinthehopesofwinningsomefavoursfromthem，buttheyrejectedthehypothesisasabsurd，andsaidthatyoucouldcarveacaponandchangeaplatedexterouslyenough，butwereonlyacommonwaiterforallthat，addingthatwithmypermissiontheywouldcomplimentyouonyourskillto—day。
"’Doso，byallmeans，ladies，’saidI，"M。Casanovaandmyselfwillbehighlyamused。’Andnowdoyoumindtellingmewhethertherebeanyfoundationoftruthinthewholestory？"
"Certainly，mylord，Iwilltellyouallwithoutreserve，butinconfidence，asthisridiculousreportmayinjurethehonourofonewhoisdeartome，andwhomIwouldnotinjurefortheworld。"
"Itistrue，then？Iamquiteinterestedtohearallaboutit。"
"Itistruetoacertainextent；Ihopeyoudon’ttakemefortherealwaiteratthe’Sword。’"
"Certainlynot，butIsupposedyouplayedthepartofwaiter？"
"Exactly。Didtheytellyouthattheywerefourincompany。"
"Ah，Ihavegotit！PrettyMadamewasoneoftheparty。Thatexplainstheriddle；nowIunderstandeverything。Butyouwerequiterightinsayingthatdiscretionwasneedful；shehasaperfectlyblamelessreputation。"
"Ah！Ididnotknowthat。Whathappenedwasquiteinnocent，butitmightbesogarbledinthetellingastobecomeprejudicialtothehonourofaladywhosebeautystruckmewithadmiration。"
Itoldhimallthedetailsofthecase，addingthatIhadonlycometoSoleureinthehopesofsucceedinginmysuit。
"Ifthatproveanimpossibility，"saidI，"IshallleaveSoleureinthreeorfourdays；butIwillfirstturnthethreeuglycompanionsofmycharmerintoridicule。Theymighthavehadsenseenoughtoguessthatthewaiter’sapronwasonlyadisguise。Theycanonlypretendtobeignorantofthefactinthehopeofgettingsomeadvantageoverme，andinjuringtheirfriend，whowasilladvisedtoletthemintothesecret。"
"Softly，softly，yougotoofastandremindmeofmyownyoungdays。
Permitmetoembraceyou，yourstoryhasdelightedme。Youshallnotgoaway，youshallstayhereandcourtyourcharmer。To—dayyoucanturntwomischievouswomenintoridicule，butdoitinaneasyway。
ThethingissostraightforwardthatM。————willbethefirsttolaughatit。Hiswifecannotbeignorantofyourloveforher，andI
knowenoughofwomentopronouncethatyourdisguisecannothavedispleasedher。Shedoesknowofyourlove？"
"Undoubtedly。"
Hewentawaylaughing，andatthedoorofhiscoachembracedmeforthethirdtime。
IcouldnotdoubtthatmycharmerhadtoldthewholestorytoherthreefriendsastheywerereturningfromEinsiedeltoZurich，andthismadetheparttheyhadplayedallthemoreill—natured；butI
feltthatitwastomyinteresttolettheirmalicepassforwit。
Iwenttotheambassador’sathalf—pastone，andaftermakingmybowtohimIproceededtogreetthecompany，andsawthetwoladies。
Thereupon，withafrankandgenerousair，Iwentuptothemoremalicious—lookingofthetwo（shewaslame，whichmayhavemademethinkhermoreill—looking）andaskedifsherecognizedme。
"Youconfess，then，thatyouarethewaiteratthe’Sword’？"
"Well，notquitethat，madam，butIconfessthatIwasthewaiterforanhour，andthatyoucruellydisdainedtoaddressasinglewordtome，thoughIwasonlyawaiter，becauseIlongedfortheblissofseeingyou。ButIhopeIshallbealittlemorefortunatehere，andthatyouwillallowmetopayyoumyrespectfulhomage。"
"Thisisverywonderful！Youplayedyourpartsowellthatthesharpesteyewouldhavebeendeceived。Nowweshallseeifyouplayyournewpartaswell。IfyoudomethehonourtocallonmeIwillgiveyouagoodwelcome。"
Afterthesecomplimentaryspeeches，thestorybecamepublicproperty，andthewholetablewasamusingitselfwithit，whenIhadthehappinessofseeingM。————andMadamecomingintotheroom。
"Thereisthegood—naturedwaiter，"saidshetoherhusband。
Theworthymansteppedforward，andpolitelythankedmeforhavingdonehiswifethehonouroftakingoffherboots。
Thistoldmethatshehadconcealednothing，andIwasglad。Dinnerwasserved，M。deChavignimademycharmersitathisrighthand，andIwasplacedbetweenmytwocalumniators。Iwasobligedtohidemygame，so，althoughIdislikedthemintensely，Imadelovetothem，hardlyraisingmyeyestoglanceatMadame，wholookedravishing。I
didnotfindherhusbandeitherasoldorasjealousasIhadexpected。Theambassadoraskedhimandhiswifetostaytheeveningtoanimpromptuball，andthensaid，thatinorderformetobeabletotelltheDucdeChoiseulthatIwaswellamusedatSoleure，hewouldbedelightedtohaveaplay，ifMadamewouldactthefair’Ecossaise’again。Shesaidsheshouldbedelighted，buttwomoreactorswerewanted。
"Thatisallright，"saidthekindoldgentleman，"IwillplayMontrose。"
"AndI，Murray，"Iremarked。
Mylamefriend，angryatthisarrangement，whichonlylefthertheverybadpartofLadyAlton，couldnothelplancingashaftatme。
"Oh！whyisn’tthereawaiter’spartintheplay？"saidshe，"youwouldplayitsowell。"
"Thatiswellsaid，butIhopeyouwillteachmetoplayMurrayevenbetter。"
Nextmorning，Igotthewordsofmypart，andtheambassadortoldmethattheballwouldbegiveninmyhonour。AfterdinnerIwenttomyinn，andaftermakinganelaboratetoiletteIreturnedtothebrilliantcompany。
Theambassadorbeggedmetoopentheball，andintroducedmetothehighestbornbutnotthemostbeautifulladyintheplace。Ithendancedwithalltheladiespresentuntilthegood—naturedoldmangotmetheobjectofmyvowsasapartnerinthequadrilles，whichhedidsoeasilythatnoonecouldhavemadeanyremark。"LordMurray，"
saidhe，"mustdancewithnoonebutLindane。"
AtthefirstpauseItooktheopportunityofsayingthatIhadonlycometoSoleureforhersake，thatitwasforhersakethatIhaddisguisedmyselfatZurich，andthatIhopedshewouldpermitmetopaymyaddressestoher。