Eventheunderstandingofthebestwomanseemstoworkmainlythroughheraffections。Andthus，thoughmanmaydirecttheintellect，womancultivatesthefeelings，whichmainlydeterminethecharacter。Whilehefillsthememory，sheoccupiestheheart。
Shemakesuslovewhathecanonlymakeusbelieve，anditischieflythroughherthatweareenabledtoarriveatvirtue。
Therespectiveinfluencesofthefatherandthemotheronthetraininganddevelopmentofcharacter，areremarkablyillustratedinthelifeofSt。Augustine。WhileAugustine’sfather，apoorfreemanofThagaste，proudofhisson’sabilities，endeavouredtofurnishhismindwiththehighestlearningoftheschools，andwasextolledbyhisneighboursforthesacrificeshemadewiththatobject”beyondtheabilityofhismeans”——hismotherMonica，ontheotherhand，soughttoleadherson’smindinthedirectionofthehighestgood，andwithpiouscarecounselledhim，entreatedhim，advisedhimtochastity，and，amidstmuchanguishandtribulation，becauseofhiswickedlife，neverceasedtoprayforhimuntilherprayerswereheardandanswered。Thusherloveatlasttriumphed，andthepatienceandgoodnessofthemotherwererewarded，notonlybytheconversionofhergiftedson，butalsoofherhusband。Laterinlife，andafterherhusband’sdeath，Monica，drawnbyheraffection，followedhersontoMilan，towatchoverhim；andthereshedied，whenhewasinhisthirty-
thirdyear。Butitwasintheearlierperiodofhislifethatherexampleandinstructionmadethedeepestimpressionuponhismind，anddeterminedhisfuturecharacter。
Therearemanysimilarinstancesofearlyimpressionsmadeuponachild’smind，springingupintogoodactslateinlife，afteraninterveningperiodofselfishnessandvice。Parentsmaydoallthattheycantodevelopeanuprightandvirtuouscharacterintheirchildren，andapparentlyinvain。Itseemslikebreadcastuponthewatersandlost。AndyetsometimesithappensthatlongaftertheparentshavegonetotheirRest——itmaybetwentyyearsormore——thegoodprecept，thegoodexamplesetbeforetheirsonsanddaughtersinchildhood，atlengthspringsupandbearsfruit。
OneofthemostremarkableofsuchinstanceswasthatoftheReverendJohnNewtonofOlney，thefriendofCowperthepoet。Itwaslongsubsequenttothedeathofbothhisparents，andafterleadingaviciouslifeasayouthandasaseaman，thathebecamesuddenlyawakenedtoasenseofhisdepravity；andthenitwasthatthelessonswhichhismotherhadgivenhimwhenachildsprangupvividlyinhismemory。Hervoicecametohimasitwerefromthedead，andledhimgentlybacktovirtueandgoodness。
AnotherinstanceisthatofJohnRandolph，theAmericanstatesman，whooncesaid:”Ishouldhavebeenanatheistifithadnotbeenforonerecollection——andthatwasthememoryofthetimewhenmydepartedmotherusedtotakemylittlehandinhers，andcausemeonmykneestosay，’OurFatherwhoartinheaven！’”
Butsuchinstancemust，onthewhole，beregardedasexceptional。
Asthecharacterisbiassedinearlylife，soitgenerallyremains，graduallyassumingitspermanentformasmanhoodisreached。”Liveaslongasyoumay，”saidSouthey，”thefirsttwentyyearsarethelongesthalfofyourlife，”andtheyarebyfarthemostpregnantinconsequences。Whentheworn-outslandererandvoluptuary，Dr。Wolcot，layonhisdeathbed，oneofhisfriendsaskedifhecoulddoanythingtogratifyhim。”Yes，”
saidthedyingman，eagerly，”givemebackmyyouth。”Givehimbutthat，andhewouldrepent——hewouldreform。Butitwasalltoolate！Hislifehadbecomeboundandenthralledbythechainsofhabit。’3
Gretry，themusicalcomposer，thoughtsohighlyoftheimportanceofwomanasaneducatorofcharacter，thathedescribedagoodmotheras”Nature’sCHEF-D’OEUVRE。”Andhewasright:forgoodmothers，farmorethanfathers，tendtotheperpetualrenovationofmankind，creating，astheydo，themoralatmosphereofthehome，whichisthenutrimentofman’smoralbeing，asthephysicalatmosphereisofhiscorporealframe。Bygoodtemper，suavity，andkindness，directedbyintelligence，womansurroundstheindwellerswithapervadingatmosphereofcheerfulness，contentment，andpeace，suitableforthegrowthofthepurestasofthemanliestnatures。
Thepoorestdwelling，presidedoverbyavirtuous，thrifty，cheerful，andcleanlywoman，maythusbetheabodeofcomfort，virtue，andhappiness；itmaybethesceneofeveryennoblingrelationinfamilylife；itmaybeendearedtoamanbymanydelightfulassociations；furnishingasanctuaryfortheheart，arefugefromthestormsoflife，asweetresting-placeafterlabour，aconsolationinmisfortune，aprideinprosperity，andajoyatalltimes。
Thegoodhomeisthusthebestofschools，notonlyinyouthbutinage。Thereyoungandoldbestlearncheerfulness，patience，self-control，andthespiritofserviceandofduty。IzaakWalton，speakingofGeorgeHerbert’smother，saysshegovernedherfamilywithjudiciouscare，notrigidlynorsourly，”butwithsuchasweetnessandcompliancewiththerecreationsandpleasuresofyouth，asdidinclinethemtospendmuchoftheirtimeinhercompany，whichwastohergreatcontent。”
Thehomeisthetrueschoolofcourtesy，ofwhichwomanisalwaysthebestpracticalinstructor。”Withoutwoman，”saystheProvencalproverb，”menwerebutill-lickedcubs。”Philanthropyradiatesfromthehomeasfromacentre。”Tolovethelittleplatoonwebelongtoinsociety，”saidBurke，”isthegermofallpublicaffections。”Thewisestandthebesthavenotbeenashamedtoownittobetheirgreatestjoyandhappinesstosit”behindtheheadsofchildren”intheinviolablecircleofhome。Alifeofpurityanddutythereisnottheleasteffectualpreparativeforalifeofpublicworkandduty；andthemanwholoveshishomewillnotthelessfondlyloveandservehiscountry。Butwhilehomes，whicharethenurseriesofcharacter，maybethebestofschools，theymayalsobetheworst。Betweenchildhoodandmanhoodhowincalculableisthemischiefwhichignoranceinthehomehasthepowertocause！Betweenthedrawingofthefirstbreathandthelast，howvastisthemoralsufferinganddiseaseoccasionedbyincompetentmothersandnurses！Commitachildtothecareofaworthlessignorantwoman，andnocultureinafter-
lifewillremedytheevilyouhavedone。Letthemotherbeidle，vicious，andaslattern；letherhomebepervadedbycavilling，petulance，anddiscontent，anditwillbecomeadwellingofmisery——aplacetoflyfrom，ratherthantoflyto；andthechildrenwhosemisfortuneitistobebroughtupthere，willbemorallydwarfedanddeformed——thecauseofmiserytothemselvesaswellastoothers。
NapoleonBuonapartewasaccustomedtosaythat”thefuturegoodorbadconductofachilddependedentirelyonthemother。”Hehimselfattributedhisriseinlifeinagreatmeasuretothetrainingofhiswill，hisenergy，andhisself-control，byhismotherathome。”Nobodyhadanycommandoverhim，”saysoneofhisbiographers，”excepthismother，whofoundmeans，byamixtureoftenderness，severity，andjustice，tomakehimlove，respect，andobeyher:fromherhelearntthevirtueofobedience。”
AcuriousillustrationofthedependenceofthecharacterofchildrenonthatofthemotherincidentallyoccursinoneofMr。
Tufnell’sschoolreports。Thetruth，heobserves，issowellestablishedthatithasevenbeenmadesubservienttomercantilecalculation。”Iwasinformed，”hesays，”inalargefactory，wheremanychildrenwereemployed，thatthemanagersbeforetheyengagedaboyalwaysinquiredintothemother’scharacter，andifthatwassatisfactorytheyweretolerablycertainthatherchildrenwouldconductthemselvescreditably。NOATTENTIONWAS
PAIDTOTHECHARACTEROFTHEFATHER。”4
Ithasalsobeenobservedthatincaseswherethefatherhasturnedoutbadly——becomeadrunkard，and”gonetothedogs”——
providedthemotherisprudentandsensible，thefamilywillbekepttogether，andthechildrenprobablymaketheirwayhonourablyinlife；whereasincasesoftheoppositesort，wherethemotherturnsoutbadly，nomatterhowwell-conductedthefathermaybe，theinstancesofafter-successinlifeonthepartofthechildrenarecomparativelyrare。
Thegreaterpartoftheinfluenceexercisedbywomenontheformationofcharacternecessarilyremainsunknown。Theyaccomplishtheirbestworkinthequietseclusionofthehomeandthefamily，bysustainedeffortandpatientperseveranceinthepathofduty。Theirgreatesttriumphs，becauseprivateanddomestic，arerarelyrecorded；anditisnotoften，eveninthebiographiesofdistinguishedmen，thatwehearofthesharewhichtheirmothershavehadintheformationoftheircharacter，andingivingthemabiastowardsgoodness。Yetaretheynotonthataccountwithouttheirreward。Theinfluencetheyhaveexercised，thoughunrecorded，livesafterthem，andgoesonpropagatingitselfinconsequencesforever。
Wedonotoftenhearofgreatwomen，aswedoofgreatmen。Itisofgoodwomenthatwemostlyhear；anditisprobablethatbydeterminingthecharacterofmenandwomenforgood，theyaredoingevengreaterworkthaniftheyweretopaintgreatpictures，writegreatbooks，orcomposegreatoperas。”Itisquitetrue，”
saidJosephdeMaistre，”thatwomenhaveproducednoCHEFS-
DOEUVRE。Theyhavewrittenno’Iliad，’nor’JerusalemDelivered，’
nor’Hamlet，’nor’Phaedre，’nor’ParadiseLost，’nor’Tartuffe；’
theyhavedesignednoChurchofSt。Peter’s，composedno’Messiah，’carvedno’ApolloBelvidere，’paintedno’LastJudgment；’theyhaveinventedneitheralgebra，nortelescopes，norsteam-engines；buttheyhavedonesomethingfargreaterandbetterthanallthis，foritisattheirkneesthatuprightandvirtuousmenandwomenhavebeentrained——themostexcellentproductionsintheworld。”
DeMaistre，inhislettersandwritings，speaksofhisownmotherwithimmenseloveandreverence。Hernoblecharactermadeallotherwomenvenerableinhiseyes。Hedescribedherashis”sublimemother”——”anangeltowhomGodhadlentabodyforabriefseason。”Toherheattributedthebentofhischaracter，andallhisbiastowardsgood；andwhenhehadgrowntomatureyears，whileactingasambassadorattheCourtofSt。Petersburg，hereferredtohernobleexampleandpreceptsastherulinginfluenceinhislife。
OneofthemostcharmingfeaturesinthecharacterofSamuelJohnson，notwithstandinghisroughandshaggyexterior，wasthetendernesswithwhichheinvariablyspokeofhismother5——awomanofstrongunderstanding，whofirmlyimplantedinhismind，ashehimselfacknowledges，hisfirstimpressionsofreligion。Hewasaccustomed，eveninthetimeofhisgreatestdifficulties，tocontributelargely，outofhisslendermeans，tohercomfort；andoneofhislastactsoffilialdutywastowrite’Rasselas’
forthepurposeofpayingherlittledebtsanddefrayingherfuneralcharges。
GeorgeWashingtonwasonlyelevenyearsofage——theeldestoffivechildren——whenhisfatherdied，leavinghismotherawidow。
Shewasawomanofrareexcellence——fullofresources，agoodwomanofbusiness，anexcellentmanager，andpossessedofmuchstrengthofcharacter。Shehadherchildrentoeducateandbringup，alargehouseholdtogovern，andextensiveestatestomanage，allofwhichsheaccomplishedwithcompletesuccess。Hergoodsense，assiduity，tenderness，industry，andvigilance，enabledhertoovercomeeveryobstacle；andastherichestrewardofhersolicitudeandtoil，shehadthehappinesstoseeallherchildrencomeforwardwithafairpromiseintolife，fillingthespheresallottedtotheminamannerequallyhonourabletothemselves，andtotheparentwhohadbeentheonlyguideoftheir，principles，conduct，andhabits。6
ThebiographerofCromwellsayslittleabouttheProtector’sfather，butdwellsuponthecharacterofhismother，whomhedescribesasawomanofrarevigouranddecisionofpurpose:”A
woman，”hesays，”possessedofthegloriousfacultyofself-helpwhenotherassistancefailedher；readyforthedemandsoffortuneinitsextremestadverseturn；ofspiritandenergyequaltohermildnessandpatience；who，withthelabourofherownhands，gavedowriestofivedaughterssufficienttomarrythemintofamiliesashonourablebutmorewealthythantheirown；whosesinglepridewashonesty，andwhosepassionwaslove；whopreservedinthegorgeouspalaceatWhitehallthesimpletastesthatdistinguishedherintheoldbreweryatHuntingdon；andwhoseonlycare，amidstallhersplendour，wasforthesafetyofhersoninhisdangerouseminence。”7
WehavespokenofthemotherofNapoleonBuonaparteasawomanofgreatforceofcharacter。NotlesssowasthemotheroftheDukeofWellington，whomhersonstrikinglyresembledinfeatures，person，andcharacter；whilehisfatherwasprincipallydistinguishedasamusicalcomposerandperformer。8But，strangetosay，Wellington’smothermistookhimforadunce；and，forsomereasonorother，hewasnotsuchafavouriteasherotherchildren，untilhisgreatdeedsinafter-lifeconstrainedhertobeproudofhim。
TheNapierswereblessedinbothparents，butespeciallyintheirmother，LadySarahLennox，whoearlysoughttoinspirehersons’
mindswithelevatingthoughts，admirationofnobledeeds，andachivalrousspirit，whichbecameembodiedintheirlives，andcontinuedtosustainthem，untildeath，inthepathofdutyandofhonour。
Amongstatesmen，lawyers，anddivines，wefindmarkedmentionmadeofthemothersofLordChancellorsBacon，Erskine，andBrougham——
allwomenofgreatability，and，inthecaseofthefirst，ofgreatlearning；aswellasofthemothersofCanning，Curran，andPresidentAdams——ofHerbert，Paley，andWesley。LordBroughamspeaksintermsalmostapproachingreverenceofhisgrandmother，thesisterofProfessorRobertson，ashavingbeenmainlyinstrumentalininstillingintohismindastrongdesireforinformation，andthefirstprinciplesofthatperseveringenergyinthepursuitofeverykindofknowledgewhichformedhisprominentcharacteristicthroughoutlife。
Canning’smotherwasanIrishwomanofgreatnaturalability，forwhomhergiftedsonentertainedthegreatestloveandrespecttothecloseofhiscareer。Shewasawomanofnoordinaryintellectualpower。”Indeed，”saysCanning’sbiographer，”werewenototherwiseassuredofthefactfromdirectsources，itwouldbeimpossibletocontemplatehisprofoundandtouchingdevotiontoher，withoutbeingledtoconcludethattheobjectofsuchunchangingattachmentmusthavebeenpossessedofrareandcommandingqualities。Shewasesteemedbythecircleinwhichshelived，asawomanofgreatmentalenergy。Herconversationwasanimatedandvigorous，andmarkedbyadistinctoriginalityofmannerandachoiceoftopicsfreshandstriking，andoutofthecommonplaceroutine。Topersonswhowerebutslightlyacquaintedwithher，theenergyofhermannerhadevensomethingoftheairofeccentricity。”9
Curranspeakswithgreataffectionofhismother，asawomanofstrongoriginalunderstanding，towhosewisecounsel，consistentpiety，andlessonsofhonourableambition，whichshediligentlyenforcedonthemindsofherchildren，hehimselfprincipallyattributedhissuccessinlife。”Theonlyinheritance，”heusedtosay，”thatIcouldboastoffrommypoorfather，wastheveryscantyoneofanunattractivefaceandperson；likehisown；andiftheworldhaseverattributedtomesomethingmorevaluablethanfaceorperson，orthanearthlywealth，itwasthatanotherandadearerparentgaveherchildaportionfromthetreasureofhermind。”10
Whenex-PresidentAdamswaspresentattheexaminationofagirls’
schoolatBoston，hewaspresentedbythepupilswithanaddresswhichdeeplyaffectedhim；andinacknowledgingit，hetooktheopportunityofreferringtothelastinginfluencewhichwomanlytrainingandassociationhadexerciseduponhisownlifeandcharacter。”Asachild，”hesaid，”Ienjoyedperhapsthegreatestofblessingsthatcanbebestowedonman——thatofamother，whowasanxiousandcapabletoformthecharactersofherchildrenrightly。FromherIderivedwhateverinstructionreligiousespecially，andmoralhaspervadedalonglife——Iwillnotsayperfectly，orasitoughttobe；butIwillsay，becauseitisonlyjusticetothememoryofherIrevere，that，inthecourseofthatlife，whateverimperfectiontherehasbeen，ordeviationfromwhatshetaughtme，thefaultismine，andnothers。”
TheWesleyswerepeculiarlylinkedtotheirparentsbynaturalpiety，thoughthemother，ratherthanthefather，influencedtheirmindsanddevelopedtheircharacters。Thefatherwasamanofstrongwill，butoccasionallyharshandtyrannicalinhisdealingswithhisfamily；11whilethemother，withmuchstrengthofunderstandingandardentloveoftruth，wasgentle，persuasive，affectionate，andsimple。Shewastheteacherandcheerfulcompanionofherchildren，whograduallybecamemouldedbyherexample。Itwasthroughthebiasgivenbyhertohersons’mindsinreligiousmattersthattheyacquiredthetendencywhich，eveninearlyyears，drewtothemthenameofMethodists。Inalettertoherson，SamuelWesley，whenascholaratWestminsterin1709，shesaid:”IwouldadviseyouasmuchaspossibletothrowyourbusinessintoacertainMETHOD，bywhichmeansyouwilllearntoimproveeverypreciousmoment，andfindanunspeakablefacilityintheperformanceofyourrespectiveduties。”This”method”shewentontodescribe，exhortingherson”inallthingstoactuponprinciple；”andthesocietywhichthebrothersJohnandCharlesafterwardsfoundedatOxfordissupposedtohavebeeninagreatmeasuretheresultofherexhortations。
Inthecaseofpoets，literarymen，andartists，theinfluenceofthemother’sfeelingandtastehasdoubtlesshadgreateffectindirectingthegeniusoftheirsons；andwefindthisespeciallyillustratedinthelivesofGray，Thomson，Scott，Southey，Bulwer，Schiller，andGoethe。Grayinherited，almostcomplete，hiskindandlovingnaturefromhismother，whilehisfatherwasharshandunamiable。Graywas，infact，afeminineman——shy，reserved，andwantinginenergy，——butthoroughlyirreproachableinlifeandcharacter。Thepoet’smothermaintainedthefamily，afterherunworthyhusbandhaddesertedher；and，atherdeath，Grayplacedonhergrave，inStokePogis，anepitaphdescribingheras”thecarefultendermotherofmanychildren，oneofwhomalonehadthemisfortunetosurviveher。”Thepoethimselfwas，athisowndesire，interredbesideherworshippedgrave。
Goethe，likeSchiller，owedthebiasofhismindandcharactertohismother，whowasawomanofextraordinarygifts。Shewasfullofjoyousflowingmother-wit，andpossessedinahighdegreetheartofstimulatingyoungandactiveminds，instructingtheminthescienceoflifeoutofthetreasuresofherabundantexperience。12
Afteralengthenedinterviewwithher，anenthusiastictravellersaid，”NowdoIunderstandhowGoethehasbecomethemanheis。”
Goethehimselfaffectionatelycherishedhermemory。”Shewasworthyoflife！”heoncesaidofher；andwhenhevisitedFrankfort，hesoughtouteveryindividualwhohadbeenkindtohismother，andthankedthemall。
ItwasAryScheffer’smother——whosebeautifulfeaturesthepaintersolovedtoreproduceinhispicturesofBeatrice，St。
Monica，andothersofhisworks——thatencouragedhisstudyofart，andbygreatself-denialprovidedhimwiththemeansofpursuingit。WhilelivingatDordrecht，inHolland，shefirstsenthimtoLilletostudy，andafterwardstoParis；andherletterstohim，whileabsent，werealwaysfullofsoundmotherlyadvice，andaffectionatewomanlysympathy。”Ifyoucouldbutseeme，”shewroteononeoccasion，”kissingyourpicture，then，afterawhile，takingitupagain，and，withatearinmyeye，callingyou’mybelovedson，’youwouldcomprehendwhatitcostsmetousesometimesthesternlanguageofauthority，andtooccasiontoyoumomentsofpain。***Workdiligently——be，aboveall，modestandhumble；andwhenyoufindyourselfexcellingothers，thencomparewhatyouhavedonewithNatureitself，orwiththe’ideal’
ofyourownmind，andyouwillbesecured，bythecontrastwhichwillbeapparent，againsttheeffectsofprideandpresumption。”
Longyearsafter，whenArySchefferwashimselfagrandfather，herememberedwithaffectiontheadviceofhismother，andrepeatedittohischildren。Andthusthevitalpowerofgoodexamplelivesonfromgenerationtogeneration，keepingtheworldeverfreshandyoung。Writingtohisdaughter，MadameMarjolin，in1846，hisdepartedmother’sadvicerecurredtohim，andhesaid:”ThewordMUST——fixitwellinyourmemory，dearchild；yourgrandmotherseldomhaditoutofhers。Thetruthis，thatthroughourlivesnothingbringsanygoodfruitexceptwhatisearnedbyeithertheworkofthehands，orbytheexertionofone’sself-
denial。Sacrificesmust，inshort，beevergoingonifwewouldobtainanycomfortorhappiness。NowthatIamnolongeryoung，I
declarethatfewpassagesinmylifeaffordmesomuchsatisfactionasthoseinwhichImadesacrifices，ordeniedmyselfenjoyments。’DasEntsagen’theforbiddenisthemottoofthewiseman。Self-denialisthequalityofwhichJesusChristsetustheexample。”13
TheFrenchhistorianMicheletmakesthefollowingtouchingreferencetohismotherinthePrefacetooneofhismostpopularbooks，thesubjectofmuchembitteredcontroversyatthetimeatwhichitappeared:-”Whilstwritingallthis，Ihavehadinmymindawoman，whosestrongandseriousmindwouldnothavefailedtosupportmeinthesecontentions。IlostherthirtyyearsagoIwasachildthen——nevertheless，everlivinginmymemory，shefollowsmefromagetoage。”Shesufferedwithmeinmypoverty，andwasnotallowedtosharemybetterfortune。Whenyoung，Imadehersad，andnowIcannotconsoleher。Iknownotevenwhereherbonesare:Iwastoopoorthentobuyearthtoburyher！””AndyetIowehermuch。IfeeldeeplythatIamthesonofwoman。Everyinstant，inmyideasandwordsnottomentionmyfeaturesandgestures，Ifindagainmymotherinmyself。
Itismymother’sbloodwhichgivesmethesympathyIfeelforbygoneages，andthetenderremembranceofallthosewhoarenownomore。””WhatreturnthencouldI，whoammyselfadvancingtowardsoldage，makeherforthemanythingsIoweher？One，forwhichshewouldhavethankedme——thisprotestinfavourofwomenandmothers。”14
Butwhileamothermaygreatlyinfluencethepoeticorartisticmindofhersonforgood，shemayalsoinfluenceitforevil。
ThusthecharacteristicsofLordByron——thewaywardnessofhisimpulses，hisdefianceofrestraint，thebitternessofhishate，andtheprecipitancyofhisresentments——weretraceableinnosmalldegreetotheadverseinfluencesexerciseduponhismindfromhisbirthbyhiscapricious，violent，andheadstrongmother。
Sheeventauntedhersonwithhispersonaldeformity；anditwasnounfrequentoccurrence，intheviolentquarrelswhichoccurredbetweenthem，forhertotakeupthepokerortongs，andhurlthemafterhimashefledfromherpresence。15ItwasthisunnaturaltreatmentthatgaveamorbidturntoByron’safter-life；and，careworn，unhappy，great，andyetweakashewas，hecarriedaboutwithhimthemother’spoisonwhichhehadsuckedinhisinfancy。
Henceheexclaims，inhis’ChildeHarold’:-”YetmustIthinklesswildly:-IhavethoughtToolonganddarkly，tillmybrainbecame，Initsowneddyboilingando’erwrought，Awhirlinggulfofphantasyandflame:
Andthus，UNTAUGHTINYOUTHMYHEARTTOTAME，MYSPRINGSOFLIFEWEREPOISONED。”
Inlikemanner，thoughinadifferentway，thecharacterofMrs。
Foote，theactor’smother，wascuriouslyrepeatedinthelifeofherjoyous，jovial-heartedson。Thoughshehadbeenheiresstoalargefortune，shesoonspentitall，andwasatlengthimprisonedfordebt。InthisconditionshewrotetoSam，whohadbeenallowingherahundredayearoutoftheproceedsofhisacting:-”DearSam，Iaminprisonfordebt；comeandassistyourlovingmother，E。Foote。”Towhichhersoncharacteristicallyreplied——”Dearmother，soamI；whichpreventshisdutybeingpaidtohislovingmotherbyheraffectionateson，SamFoote。”
Afoolishmothermayalsospoilagiftedson，byimbuinghismindwithunsoundsentiments。ThusLamartine’smotherissaidtohavetrainedhiminaltogethererroneousideasoflife，intheschoolofRousseauandBernardindeSt-Pierre，bywhichhissentimentalism，sufficientlystrongbynature，wasexaggeratedinsteadofrepressed:16andhebecamethevictimoftears，affectation，andimprovidence，allhislifelong。ItalmostsavoursoftheridiculoustofindLamartine，inhis’Confidences，’
representinghimselfasa”statueofAdolescenceraisedasamodelforyoungmen。”17Ashewashismother’sspoiltchild，sohewasthespoiltchildofhiscountrytotheend，whichwasbitterandsad。Sainte-Beuvesaysofhim:”Hewasthecontinualobjectoftherichestgifts，whichhehadnotthepowerofmanaging，scatteringandwastingthem——all，excepting，thegiftofwords，whichseemedinexhaustible，andonwhichhecontinuedtoplaytotheendasonanenchantedflute。”18
WehavespokenofthemotherofWashingtonasanexcellentwomanofbusiness；andtopossesssuchaqualityascapacityforbusinessisnotonlycompatiblewithtruewomanliness，butisinameasureessentialtothecomfortandwellbeingofeveryproperly-
governedfamily。Habitsofbusinessdonotrelatetotrademerely，butapplytoallthepracticalaffairsoflife——toeverythingthathastobearranged，tobeorganised，tobeprovidedfor，tobedone。Andinalltheserespectsthemanagementofafamily，andofahousehold，isasmuchamatterofbusinessasthemanagementofashoporofacounting-house。Itrequiresmethod，accuracy，organization，industry，economy，discipline，tact，knowledge，andcapacityforadaptingmeanstoends。Allthisisoftheessenceofbusiness；andhencebusinesshabitsareasnecessarytobecultivatedbywomenwhowouldsucceedintheaffairsofhome——inotherwords，whowouldmakehomehappy——asbymenintheaffairsoftrade，ofcommerce，orofmanufacture。
Theideahas，however，heretoforeprevailed，thatwomenhavenoconcernwithsuchmatters，andthatbusinesshabitsandqualificationsrelatetomenonly。Take，forinstance，theknowledgeoffigures。Mr。Brighthassaidofboys，”Teachaboyarithmeticthoroughly，andheisamademan。”Andwhy？——Becauseitteacheshimmethod，accuracy，value，proportions，relations。
Buthowmanygirlsaretaughtarithmeticwell？——Veryfewindeed。
Andwhatistheconsequence？——Whenthegirlbecomesawife，ifsheknowsnothingoffigures，andisinnocentofadditionandmultiplication，shecankeepnorecordofincomeandexpenditure，andtherewillprobablybeasuccessionofmistakescommittedwhichmaybeprolificindomesticcontention。Thewoman，notbeinguptoherbusiness——thatis，themanagementofherdomesticaffairsinconformitywiththesimpleprinciplesofarithmetic——
will，throughsheerignorance，beapttocommitextravagances，thoughunintentional，whichmaybemostinjurioustoherfamilypeaceandcomfort。
Method，whichisthesoulofbusiness，isalsoofessentialimportanceinthehome。Workcanonlybegotthroughbymethod。
Muddlefliesbeforeit，andhugger-muggerbecomesathingunknown。
Methoddemandspunctuality，anothereminentlybusinessquality。
Theunpunctualwoman，liketheunpunctualman，occasionsdislike，becausesheconsumesandwastestime，andprovokesthereflectionthatwearenotofsufficientimportancetomakehermoreprompt。
Tothebusinessman，timeismoney；buttothebusinesswoman，methodismore——itispeace，comfort，anddomesticprosperity。
Prudenceisanotherimportantbusinessqualityinwomen，asinmen。Prudenceispracticalwisdom，andcomesofthecultivatedjudgment。Ithasreferenceinallthingstofitness，topropriety；judgingwiselyoftherightthingtobedone，andtherightwayofdoingit。Itcalculatesthemeans，order，time，andmethodofdoing。Prudencelearnsfromexperience，quickenedbyknowledge。
Forthese，amongstotherreasons，habitsofbusinessarenecessarytobecultivatedbyallwomen，inordertotheirbeingefficienthelpersintheworld’sdailylifeandwork。Furthermore，todirectthepowerofthehomearight，women，asthenurses，trainers，andeducatorsofchildren，needallthehelpandstrengththatmentalculturecangivethem。
Mereinstinctiveloveisnotsufficient。Instinct，whichpreservesthelowercreatures，needsnotraining；buthumanintelligence，whichisinconstantrequestinafamily，needstobeeducated。ThephysicalhealthoftherisinggenerationisentrustedtowomanbyProvidence；anditisinthephysicalnaturethatthemoralandmentalnatureliesenshrined。Itisonlybyactinginaccordancewiththenaturallaws，whichbeforeshecanfollowwomanmustneedsunderstand，thattheblessingsofhealthofbody，andhealthofmindandmorals，canbesecuredathome。
Withoutaknowledgeofsuchlaws，themother’slovetoooftenfindsitsrecompenceonlyinachild’scoffin。19
Itisameretruismtosaythattheintellectwithwhichwomanaswellasmanisendowed，hasbeengivenforuseandexercise，andnot”tofustinherunused。”Suchendowmentsareneverconferredwithoutapurpose。TheCreatormaybelavishinHisgifts，butheisneverwasteful。
Womanwasnotmeanttobeeitheranunthinkingdrudge，orthemerelyprettyornamentofman’sleisure。Sheexistsforherself，aswellasforothers；andtheseriousandresponsibledutiessheiscalledupontoperforminlife，requirethecultivatedheadaswellasthesympathisingheart。Herhighestmissionisnottobefulfilledbythemasteryoffleetingaccomplishments，onwhichsomuchusefultimeisnowwasted；for，thoughaccomplishmentsmayenhancethecharmsofyouthandbeauty，ofthemselvessufficientlycharming，theywillbefoundofverylittleuseintheaffairsofreallife。
ThehighestpraisewhichtheancientRomanscouldexpressofanoblematronwasthatshesatathomeandspan——”DOMUMMANSIT，LANAMFECIT。”Inourowntime，ithasbeensaidthatchemistryenoughtokeepthepotboiling，andgeographyenoughtoknowthedifferentroomsinherhouse，wasscienceenoughforanywoman；
whilstByron，whosesympathiesforwomanwereofaveryimperfectkind，professedthathewouldlimitherlibrarytoaBibleandacookery-book。Butthisviewofwoman’scharacterandcultureisasabsurdlynarrowandunintelligent，ontheonehand，astheoppositeview，nowsomuchinvogue，isextravagantandunnaturalontheother——thatwomanoughttobeeducatedsoastobeasmuchaspossibletheequalofman；undistinguishablefromhim，exceptinsex；equaltohiminrightsandvotes；andhiscompetitorinallthatmakeslifeafierceandselfishstruggleforplaceandpowerandmoney。
Speakinggenerally，thetraininganddisciplinethataremostsuitablefortheonesexinearlylife，arealsothemostsuitablefortheother；andtheeducationandculturethatfillthemindofthemanwillproveequallywholesomeforthewoman。Indeed，alltheargumentswhichhaveyetbeenadvancedinfavourofthehighereducationofmen，pleadequallystronglyinfavourofthehighereducationofwomen。Inallthedepartmentsofhome，intelligencewilladdtowoman’susefulnessandefficiency。Itwillgiveherthoughtandforethought，enablehertoanticipateandprovideforthecontingenciesoflife，suggestimprovedmethodsofmanagement，andgiveherstrengthineveryway。Indisciplinedmentalpowershewillfindastrongerandsaferprotectionagainstdeceptionandimposturethaninmereinnocentandunsuspectingignorance；inmoralandreligiouscultureshewillsecuresourcesofinfluencemorepowerfulandenduringthaninphysicalattractions；andindueself-relianceandself-dependenceshewilldiscoverthetruestsourcesofdomesticcomfortandhappiness。
Butwhilethemindandcharacterofwomenoughttobecultivatedwithaviewtotheirownwellbeing，theyoughtnotthelesstobeeducatedliberallywithaviewtothehappinessofothers。Menthemselvescannotbesoundinmindormoralsifwomenbethereverse；andif，asweholdtobethecase，themoralconditionofapeoplemainlydependsupontheeducationofthehome，thentheeducationofwomenistoberegardedasamatterofnationalimportance。Notonlydoesthemoralcharacterbutthementalstrengthofmanfindtheirbestsafeguardandsupportinthemoralpurityandmentalcultivationofwoman；butthemorecompletelythepowersofbotharedeveloped，themoreharmoniousandwell-
orderedwillsocietybe——themoresafeandcertainitselevationandadvancement。
Whenaboutfiftyyearssince，thefirstNapoleonsaidthatthegreatwantofFrancewasmothers，hemeant，inotherwords，thattheFrenchpeopleneededtheeducationofhomes，providedoverbygood，virtuous，intelligentwomen。Indeed，thefirstFrenchRevolutionpresentedoneofthemoststrikingillustrationsofthesocialmischiefsresultingfromaneglectofthepurifyinginfluenceofwomen。Whenthatgreatnationaloutbreakoccurred，societywasimpenetratedwithviceandprofligacy。Morals，religion，virtue，wereswampedbysensualism。Thecharacterofwomanhadbecomedepraved。Conjugalfidelitywasdisregarded；
maternitywasheldinreproach；familyandhomewerealikecorrupted。Domesticpuritynolongerboundsocietytogether。
Francewasmotherless；thechildrenbrokeloose；andtheRevolutionburstforth，”amidsttheyellsandthefierceviolenceofwomen。”20
Buttheterriblelessonwasdisregarded，andagainandagainFrancehasgrievouslysufferedfromthewantofthatdiscipline，obedience，self-control，andself-respectwhichcanonlybetrulylearntathome。ItissaidthattheThirdNapoleonattributedtherecentpowerlessnessofFrance，whichleftherhelplessandbleedingatthefeetofherconquerors，tothefrivolityandlackofprincipleofthepeople，aswellastotheirloveofpleasure——
which，however，itmustbeconfessed，hehimselfdidnotalittletofoster。ItwouldthusseemthatthedisciplinewhichFrancestillneedstolearn，ifshewouldbegoodandgreat，isthatindicatedbytheFirstNapoleon——homeeducationbygoodmothers。
Theinfluenceofwomanisthesameeverywhere。Herconditioninfluencesthemorals，manners，andcharacterofthepeopleinallcountries。Wheresheisdebased，societyisdebased；wheresheismorallypureandenlightened，societywillbeproportionatelyelevated。
Hence，toinstructwomanistoinstructman；toelevatehercharacteristoraisehisown；toenlargehermentalfreedomistoextendandsecurethatofthewholecommunity。ForNationsarebuttheoutcomesofHomes，andPeoplesofMothers。
Butwhileitiscertainthatthecharacterofanationwillbeelevatedbytheenlightenmentandrefinementofwoman，itismuchmorethandoubtfulwhetheranyadvantageistobederivedfromherenteringintocompetitionwithmanintheroughworkofbusinessandpolities。Womencannomoredomen’sspecialworkintheworldthanmencandowomen’s。Andwhereverwomanhasbeenwithdrawnfromherhomeandfamilytoenteruponotherwork，theresulthasbeensociallydisastrous。Indeed，theeffortsofsomeofthebestphilanthropistshaveoflateyearsbeendevotedtowithdrawingwomenfromtoilingalongsideofmenincoalpits，factories，nailshops，andbrickyards。
ItisstillnotuncommonintheNorthforthehusbandstobeidleathome，whilethemothersanddaughtersareworkinginthefactory；theresultbeing，inmanycases，anentiresubversionoffamilyorder，ofdomesticdiscipline，andofhomerule。21Andformanyyearspast，inParis，thatstateofthingshasbeenreachedwhichsomewomendesiretoeffectamongstourselves。Thewomentheremainlyattendtobusiness——servingtheBOUTIQUE，orpresidingattheCOMPTOIR——whilethemenloungeabouttheBoulevards。Buttheresulthasonlybeenhomelessness，degeneracy，andfamilyandsocialdecay。
Noristhereanyreasontobelievethattheelevationandimprovementofwomenaretobesecuredbyinvestingthemwithpoliticalpower。Thereare，however，inthesedays，manybelieversinthepotentialityof”votes，”22whoanticipatesomeindefinitegoodfromthe”enfranchisement”ofwomen。Itisnotnecessaryheretoenteruponthediscussionofthisquestion。Butitmaybesufficienttostatethatthepowerwhichwomendonotpossesspoliticallyisfarmorethancompensatedbythatwhichtheyexerciseinprivatelife——bytheirtraininginthehomethosewho，whetherasmenoraswomen，doallthemanlyaswellaswomanlyworkoftheworld。TheRadicalBenthamhassaidthatman，evenifhewould，cannotkeeppowerfromwoman；forthatshealreadygovernstheworld”withthewholepowerofadespot，”23
thoughthepowerthatshemainlygovernsbyislove。Andtoformthecharacterofthewholehumanrace，iscertainlyapowerfargreaterthanthatwhichwomencouldeverhopetoexerciseasvotersformembersofParliament，orevenaslawmakers。
Thereis，however，onespecialdepartmentofwoman’sworkdemandingtheearnestattentionofalltruefemalereformers，thoughitisonewhichhashithertobeenunaccountablyneglected。
Wemeanthebettereconomizingandpreparationofhumanfood，thewasteofwhichatpresent，forwantofthemostordinaryculinaryknowledge，islittleshortofscandalous。Ifthatmanistoberegardedasabenefactorofhisspecieswhomakestwostalksofcorntogrowwhereonlyonegrewbefore，notlessisshetoberegardedasapublicbenefactorwhoeconomizesandturnstothebestpracticalaccountthefood-productsofhumanskillandlabour。Theimproveduseofevenourexistingsupplywouldbeequivalenttoanimmediateextensionofthecultivableacreageofourcountry——nottospeakoftheincreaseinhealth，economy，anddomesticcomfort。Wereourfemalereformersonlytoturntheirenergiesinthisdirectionwitheffect，theywouldearnthegratitudeofallhouseholds，andbeesteemedasamongthegreatestofpracticalphilanthropists。
NOTES
1Civicvirtues，unlesstheyhavetheiroriginandconsecrationinprivateanddomesticvirtues，arebutthevirtuesofthetheatre。
Hewhohasnotalovingheartforhischild，cannotpretendtohaveanytrueloveforhumanity——JulesSimon’sLEDEVOIR。
2’Levana；or，TheDoctrineofEducation。’
3Speakingoftheforceofhabit，St。Augustinesaysinhis’Confessions’”Mywilltheenemyheld，andthencehadmadeachainforme，andboundme。Forofafrowardwillwasalustmade；andalustservedbecamecustom；andcustomnotresistedbecamenecessity。Bywhichlinks，asitwere，joinedtogetherwhenceI
calleditachainahardbondageheldmeenthralled。”
4Mr。Tufnell，in’ReportsofInspectorsofParochialSchoolUnionsinEnglandandWales，’1850。
5SeethelettersJanuary13th，16th，18th，20th，and23rd，1759，writtenbyJohnsontohismotherwhenshewasninety，andhehimselfwasinhisfiftiethyear——CrokersBOSWELL，8vo。Ed。pp。
113，114。
6JaredSparks’’LifeofWashington。’
7Forster’s’EminentBritishStatesmen’CabinetCyclop。vi。8。
8TheEarlofMornington，composerof’Hereincoolgrot，’&c。
9RobertBell’s’LifeofCanning，’p。37。
10’LifeofCurran，’byhisson，p。4。
11ThefatheroftheWesleyshadevendeterminedatonetimetoabandonhiswifebecauseherconscienceforbadehertoassenttohisprayersforthethenreigningmonarch，andhewasonlysavedfromtheconsequencesofhisrashresolvebytheaccidentaldeathofWilliamIII。Hedisplayedthesameoverbearingdispositionindealingwithhischildren；forcinghisdaughterMehetabeltomarry，againstherwill，amanwhomshedidnotlove，andwhoprovedentirelyunworthyofher。
12Goethehimselfsays——”VomVaterhab’ichdieStatur，DesLebensernstesFuhren；
VonMutterchendieFrohnaturUndLustzufabuliren。”
13Mrs。Grote’s’LifeofAryScheffer，’p。154。
14Michelet，’OnPriests，Women，andFamilies。’
15Mrs。Byronissaidtohavediedinafitofpassion，broughtonbyreadingherupholsterer’sbills。
16Sainte-Beuve，’CauseriesduLundi，’i。23。
17Ibid。i。22。
18Ibid。1。23。
19Thataboutone-thirdofallthechildrenborninthiscountrydieunderfiveyearsofage，canonlyheattributabletoignoranceofthenaturallaws，ignoranceofthehumanconstitution，andignoranceoftheusesofpureair，purewater，andoftheartofpreparingandadministeringwholesomefood。Thereisnosuchmortalityamongsttheloweranimals。
20Beaumarchais’’Figaro，’whichwasreceivedwithsuchenthusiasminFranceshortlybeforetheoutbreakoftheRevolution，mayberegardedasatypicalplay；itrepresentedtheaveragemoralityoftheupperaswellasthelowerclasseswithrespecttotherelationsbetweenthesexes。”Labelmenhowyouplease，”saysHerbertSpencer，”withtitlesof’upper’and’middle’and’lower，’
youcannotpreventthemfrombeingunitsofthesamesociety，acteduponbythesamespiritoftheage，mouldedafterthesametypeofcharacter。Themechanicallaw，thatactionandreactionareequal，hasitsmoralanalogue。Thedeedofonemantoanothertendsultimatelytoproducealikeeffectuponboth，bethedeedgoodorbad。Dobutputtheminrelationship，andnodivisionintocastes，nodifferencesofwealth，canpreventmenfromassimilating……Thesameinfluenceswhichrapidlyadapttheindividualtohissociety，ensure，thoughbyaslowerprocess，thegeneraluniformityofanationalcharacter……Andsolongastheassimilatinginfluencesproductiveofitcontinueatwork，itisfollytosupposeanyonegradeofacommunitycanbemorallydifferentfromtherest。Inwhicheverrankyouseecorruption，beassureditequallypervadesallranks——beassureditisthesymptomofabadsocialdiathesis。Whilstthevirusofdepravityexistsinonepartofthebody-politic，nootherpartcanremainhealthy。”——SOCIALSTATICS，chap。xx。7。
21Sometwenty-eightyearssince，theauthorwroteandpublishedthefollowingpassage，notwithoutpracticalknowledgeofthesubject；
andnotwithstandingthegreatameliorationinthelotoffactory-
workers，effectedmainlythroughthenobleeffortsofLordShaftesbury，thedescriptionisstilltoalargeextenttrue:——”Thefactorysystem，howevermuchitmayhaveaddedtothewealthofthecountry，hashadamostdeleteriouseffectonthedomesticconditionofthepeople。Ithasinvadedthesanctuaryofhome，andbrokenupfamilyandsocialties。Ithastakenthewifefromthehusband，andthechildrenfromtheirparents。Especiallyhasitstendencybeentolowerthecharacterofwoman。Theperformanceofdomesticdutiesisherproperoffice，——themanagementofherhousehold，therearingofherfamily，theeconomizingofthefamilymeans，thesupplyingofthefamilywants。Butthefactorytakesherfromalltheseduties。Homesbecomenolongerhomes。Childrengrowupuneducatedandneglected。Thefineraffectionsbecomeblunted。Womanisnomorethegentlewife，companion，andfriendofman，buthisfellow-
labourerandfellow-drudge。Sheisexposedtoinfluenceswhichtooofteneffacethatmodestyofthoughtandconductwhichisoneofthebestsafeguardsofvirtue。Withoutjudgmentorsoundprinciplestoguidethem，factory-girlsearlyacquirethefeelingofindependence。Readytothrowofftheconstraintimposedonthembytheirparents，theyleavetheirhomes，andspeedilybecomeinitiatedinthevicesoftheirassociates。Theatmosphere，physicalaswellasmoral，inwhichtheylive，stimulatestheiranimalappetites；theinfluenceofbadexamplebecomescontagiousamongthemandmischiefispropagatedfarandwide。”——THEUNION，January，1843。
22AFrenchsatirist，pointingtotherepeatedPLEBISCITESandperpetualvotingoflateyears，andtothegrowingwantoffaithinanythingbutvotes，said，in1870，thatweseemedtoberapidlyapproachingtheperiodwhentheonlyprayerofmanandwomanwouldbe，”Giveusthisdayourdailyvote！”
23”Ofprimevalandnecessaryandabsolutesuperiority，therelationofthemothertothechildisfarmorecomplete，thoughlessseldomquotedasanexample，thanthatoffatherandson……BySirRobertFilmer，thesupposednecessaryaswellasabsolutepowerofthefatheroverhischildren，wastakenasthefoundationandorigin，andthencejustifyingcause，ofthepowerofthemonarchineverypoliticalstate。Withmoreproprietyhemighthavestatedtheabsolutedominionofawomanastheonlylegitimateformofgovernment。”——DEONTOLOGY，ii。181。
CHAPTERIII——COMPANIONSHIPANDEXAMPLES”Keepgoodcompany，andyoushallbeofthenumber。”——
GEORGEHERBERT。”Formineownpart，IShallbegladtolearnofnoblemen。”——SHAKSPEARE”Examplespreachtoth’eye——Carethen，minesays，Nothowyouendbuthowyouspendyourdays。”
HENRYMARTEN——’LASTTHOUGHTS。’”Dismoiquit’admire，etjediraiquitues。”——SAINTE-BEUVE
Hethatmeanstobeagoodlimnerwillbesuretodrawafterthemostexcellentcopiesandguideeverystrokeofhispencilbythebetterpatternthatlaysbeforehim；sohethatdesiresthatthetableofhislifemaybefair，willbecarefultoproposethebestexamples，andwillneverbecontenttillheequalsorexcelsthem。”——OWENFELTHAM
ThenaturaleducationoftheHomeisprolongedfarintolife——
indeed，itneverentirelyceases。Butthetimearrives，intheprogressofyears，whentheHomeceasestoexerciseanexclusiveinfluenceontheformationofcharacter；anditissucceededbythemoreartificialeducationoftheschoolandthecompanionshipoffriendsandcomrades，whichcontinuetomouldthecharacterbythepowerfulinfluenceofexample。
Men，youngandold——buttheyoungmorethantheold——cannothelpimitatingthosewithwhomtheyassociate。ItwasasayingofGeorgeHerbert’smother，intendedfortheguidanceofhersons，”thatasourbodiestakeanourishmentsuitabletothemeatonwhichwefeed，sodooursoulsasinsensiblytakeinvirtueorvicebytheexampleorconversationofgoodorbadcompany。”
Indeed，itisimpossiblethatassociationwiththoseaboutusshouldnotproduceapowerfulinfluenceintheformationofcharacter。Formenarebynatureimitators，andallpersonsaremoreorlessimpressedbythespeech，themanners，thegait，thegestures，andtheveryhabitsofthinkingoftheircompanions。”Isexamplenothing？”saidBurke。”Itiseverything。Exampleistheschoolofmankind，andtheywilllearnatnoother。”Burke’sgrandmotto，whichhewroteforthetabletoftheMarquisofRockingham，isworthrepeating:itwas，”Remember——resemble——
persevere。”
Imitationisforthemostpartsounconsciousthatitseffectsarealmostunheeded，butitsinfluenceisnotthelesspermanentonthataccount。Itisonlywhenanimpressivenatureisplacedincontactwithanimpressionableone，thatthealterationinthecharacterbecomesrecognisable。Yeteventheweakestnaturesexercisesomeinfluenceuponthoseaboutthem。Theapproximationoffeeling，thought，andhabitisconstant，andtheactionofexampleunceasing。
Emersonhasobservedthatevenoldcouples，orpersonswhohavebeenhousematesforacourseofyears，growgraduallylikeeachother；sothat，iftheyweretolivelongenough，weshouldscarcelybeabletoknowthemapart。Butifthisbetrueoftheold，howmuchmoretrueisitoftheyoung，whoseplasticnaturesaresomuchmoresoftandimpressionable，andreadytotakethestampofthelifeandconversationofthoseaboutthem！”Therehasbeen，”observedSirCharlesBellinoneofhisletters，”agooddealsaidabouteducation，buttheyappeartometoputoutofsightEXAMPLE，whichisall-in-all。Mybesteducationwastheexamplesetmebymybrothers。Therewas，inallthemembersofthefamily，arelianceonself，atrueindependence，andbyimitationIobtainedit。”1
Itisinthenatureofthingsthatthecircumstanceswhichcontributetoformthecharacter，shouldexercisetheirprincipalinfluenceduringtheperiodofgrowth。Asyearsadvance，exampleandimitationbecomecustom，andgraduallyconsolidateintohabit，whichisofsomuchpotencythat，almostbeforeweknowit，wehaveinameasureyieldeduptoitourpersonalfreedom。
ItisrelatedofPlato，thatononeoccasionhereprovedaboyforplayingatsomefoolishgame。”Thoureprovestme，”saidtheboy，”foraverylittlething。””Butcustom，”repliedPlato，”isnotalittlething。”Badcustom，consolidatedintohabit，issuchatyrantthatmensometimesclingtovicesevenwhiletheycursethem。Theyhavebecometheslavesofhabitswhosepowertheyareimpotenttoresist。HenceLockehassaidthattocreateandmaintainthatvigourofmindwhichisabletocontesttheempireofhabit，mayberegardedasoneofthechiefendsofmoraldiscipline。
Thoughmuchoftheeducationofcharacterbyexampleisspontaneousandunconscious，theyoungneednotnecessarilybethepassivefollowersorimitatorsofthoseaboutthem。Theirownconduct，farmorethantheconductoftheircompanions，tendstofixthepurposeandformtheprinciplesoftheirlife。Eachpossessesinhimselfapowerofwillandoffreeactivity，which，ifcourageouslyexercised，willenablehimtomakehisownindividualselectionoffriendsandassociates。Itisonlythroughweaknessofpurposethatyoungpeople，aswellasold，becometheslavesoftheirinclinations，orgivethemselvesuptoaservileimitationofothers。
Itisacommonsayingthatmenareknownbythecompanytheykeep。
Thesoberdonotnaturallyassociatewiththedrunken，therefinedwiththecoarse，thedecentwiththedissolute。Toassociatewithdepravedpersonsarguesalowtasteandvicioustendencies，andtofrequenttheirsocietyleadstoinevitabledegradationofcharacter。”Theconversationofsuchpersons，”saysSeneca，”isveryinjurious；forevenifitdoesnoimmediateharm，itleavesitsseedsinthemind，andfollowsuswhenwehavegonefromthespeakers——aplaguesuretospringupinfutureresurrection。”
Ifyoungmenarewiselyinfluencedanddirected，andconscientiouslyexerttheirownfreeenergies，theywillseekthesocietyofthosebetterthanthemselves，andstrivetoimitatetheirexample。Incompanionshipwiththegood，growingnatureswillalwaysfindtheirbestnourishment；whilecompanionshipwiththebadwillonlybefruitfulinmischief。Therearepersonswhomtoknowistolove，honour，andadmire；andotherswhomtoknowistoshunanddespise，——”DONTLESAVOIRN’ESTQUEBETERIE，”assaysRabelaiswhenspeakingoftheeducationofGargantua。Livewithpersonsofelevatedcharacters，andyouwillfeelliftedandlightedupinthem:”Livewithwolves，”saystheSpanishproverb，”andyouwilllearntohowl。”
Intercoursewithevencommonplace，selfishpersons，mayprovemostinjurious，byinducingadry，dullreserved，andselfishconditionofmind，moreorlessinimicaltotruemanlinessandbreadthofcharacter。Themindsoonlearnstoruninsmallgrooves，theheartgrowsnarrowandcontracted，andthemoralnaturebecomesweak，irresolute，andaccommodating，whichisfataltoallgenerousambitionorrealexcellence。
Ontheotherhand，associationwithpersonswiser，better，andmoreexperiencedthanourselves，isalwaysmoreorlessinspiringandinvigorating。Theyenhanceourownknowledgeoflife。Wecorrectourestimatesbytheirs，andbecomepartnersintheirwisdom。Weenlargeourfieldofobservationthroughtheireyes，profitbytheirexperience，andlearnnotonlyfromwhattheyhaveenjoyed，but——whichisstillmoreinstructive——fromwhattheyhavesuffered。Iftheyarestrongerthanourselves，webecomeparticipatorsintheirstrength。Hencecompanionshipwiththewiseandenergeticneverfailstohaveamostvaluableinfluenceontheformationofcharacter——increasingourresources，strengtheningourresolves，elevatingouraims，andenablingustoexercisegreaterdexterityandabilityinourownaffairs，aswellasmoreeffectivehelpfulnessofothers。”Ihaveoftendeeplyregrettedinmyself，”saysMrs。
Schimmelpenninck，”thegreatlossIhaveexperiencedfromthesolitudeofmyearlyhabits。Weneednoworsecompanionthanourunregenerateselves，and，bylivingalone，apersonnotonlybecomeswhollyignorantofthemeansofhelpinghisfellow-
creatures，butiswithouttheperceptionofthosewantswhichmostneedhelp。Associationwithothers，whennotonsolargeascaleastomakehoursofretirementimpossible，maybeconsideredasfurnishingtoanindividualarichmultipliedexperience；andsympathysodrawnforth，though，unlikecharity，itbeginsabroad，neverfailstobringbackrichtreasureshome。Associationwithothersisusefulalsoinstrengtheningthecharacter，andinenablingus，whileweneverlosesightofourmainobject，tothreadourwaywiselyandwell。”2
Anentirelynewdirectionmaybegiventothelifeofayoungmanbyahappysuggestion，atimelyhint，orthekindlyadviceofanhonestfriend。ThusthelifeofHenryMartyntheIndianmissionary，seemstohavebeensingularlyinfluencedbyafriendshipwhichheformed，whenaboy，atTruroGrammarSchool。
Martynhimselfwasoffeebleframe，andofadelicatenervoustemperament。Wantinginanimalspirits，hetookbutlittlepleasureinschoolsports；andbeingofasomewhatpetulanttemper，thebiggerboystookpleasureinprovokinghim，andsomeoftheminbullyinghim。Oneofthebiggerboys，however，conceivingafriendshipforMartyn，tookhimunderhisprotection，stoodbetweenhimandhispersecutors，andnotonlyfoughthisbattlesforhim，buthelpedhimwithhislessons。ThoughMartynwasratherabackwardpupil，hisfatherwasdesirousthatheshouldhavetheadvantageofacollegeeducation，andattheageofaboutfifteenhesenthimtoOxfordtotryforaCorpusscholarship，inwhichhefailed。HeremainedfortwoyearsmoreattheTruroGrammarSchool，andthenwenttoCambridge，wherehewasenteredatSt。John’sCollege。WhoshouldhefindalreadysettledthereasastudentbuthisoldchampionoftheTruroGrammarSchool？Theirfriendshipwasrenewed；andtheelderstudentfromthattimeforwardactedastheMentor，oftheyoungerone。Martynwasfitfulinhisstudies，excitableandpetulant，andoccasionallysubjecttofitsofalmostuncontrollablerage。
Hisbigfriend，ontheotherhand，wasasteady，patient，hardworkingfellow；andheneverceasedtowatchover，toguide，andtoadviseforgoodhisirritablefellow-student。HekeptMartynoutofthewayofevilcompany，advisedhimtoworkhard，”notforthepraiseofmen，butforthegloryofGod；”andsosuccessfullyassistedhiminhisstudies，thatatthefollowingChristmasexaminationhewasthefirstofhisyear。YetMartyn’skindfriendandMentorneverachievedanydistinctionhimself；hepassedawayintoobscurity，leading，mostprobably，ausefulthoughanunknowncareer；hisgreatestwishinlifehavingbeentoshapethecharacterofhisfriend，toinspirehissoulwiththeloveoftruth，andtopreparehimforthenoblework，onwhichheshortlyafterentered，ofanIndianmissionary。
AsomewhatsimilarincidentissaidtohaveoccurredinthecollegecareerofDr。Paley。WhenastudentatChrist’sCollegeCambridge，hewasdistinguishedforhisshrewdnessaswellashisclumsiness，andhewasatthesametimethefavouriteandthebuttofhiscompanions。Thoughhisnaturalabilitiesweregreat，hewasthoughtless，idle，andaspendthrift；andatthecommencementofhisthirdyearbehadmadecomparativelylittleprogress。
Afteroneofhisusualnight-dissipations，afriendstoodbyhisbedsideonthefollowingmorning。”Paley，”saidhe，”Ihavenotbeenabletosleepforthinkingaboutyou。Ihavebeenthinkingwhatafoolyouare！Ihavethemeansofdissipation，andcanaffordtobeidle:YOUarepoor，andcannotaffordit。Icoulddonothing，probably，evenwereItotry:YOUarecapableofdoinganything。Ihavelainawakeallnightthinkingaboutyourfolly，andIhavenowcomesolemnlytowarnyou。Indeed，ifyoupersistinyourindolence，andgooninthisway，Imustrenounceyoursocietyaltogether！
ItissaidthatPaleywassopowerfullyaffectedbythisadmonition，thatfromthatmomenthebecameanalteredman。Heformedanentirelynewplanoflife，anddiligentlyperseveredinit。Hebecameoneofthemostindustriousofstudents。Onebyonehedistancedhiscompetitors，andattheendoftheyearbecameoutSeniorWrangler。Whatheafterwardsaccomplishedasanauthorandadivineissufficientlywellknown。
NoonerecognisedmorefullytheinfluenceofpersonalexampleontheyoungthandidDr。Arnold。Itwasthegreatleverwithwhichheworkedinstrivingtoelevatethecharacterofhisschool。Hemadeithisprincipalobject，firsttoputarightspiritintotheleadingboys，byattractingtheirgoodandnoblefeelings；andthentomaketheminstrumentalinpropagatingthesamespiritamongtherest，bytheinfluenceofimitation，example，andadmiration。Heendeavouredtomakeallfeelthattheywerefellow-workerswithhimself，andsharerswithhiminthemoralresponsibilityforthegoodgovernmentoftheplace。Oneofthefirsteffectsofthishighmindedsystemofmanagementwas，thatitinspiredtheboyswithstrengthandself-respect。Theyfeltthattheyweretrusted。Therewere，ofcourse，MAUVAISSUJETSatRugby，asthereareatallschools；andtheseitwasthemaster’sdutytowatch，topreventtheirbadexamplecontaminatingothers。
Ononeoccasionhesaidtoanassistant-master:”Doyouseethosetwoboyswalkingtogether？Ineversawthemtogetherbefore。Youshouldmakeanespecialpointofobservingthecompanytheykeep:
nothingsotellsthechangesinaboy’scharacter。”
Dr。Arnold’sownexamplewasaninspiration，asisthatofeverygreatteacher。Inhispresence，youngmenlearnedtorespectthemselves；andoutoftherootofself-respecttheregrewupthemanlyvirtues。”Hisverypresence，”sayshisbiographer，”seemedtocreateanewspringofhealthandvigourwithinthem，andtogivetolifeaninterestandelevationwhichremainedwiththemlongaftertheyhadlefthim；anddweltsohabituallyintheirthoughtsasalivingimage，that，whendeathhadtakenhimaway，thebondappearedtobestillunbroken，andthesenseofseparationalmostlostinthestilldeepersenseofalifeandaUnionindestructible。”3AndthusitwasthatDr。Arnoldtrainedahostofmanlyandnoblecharacters，whospreadtheinfluenceofhisexampleinallpartsoftheworld。
SoalsowasitsaidofDugaldStewart，thathebreathedtheloveofvirtueintowholegenerationsofpupils。”Tome，”saysthelateLordCockburn，”hislectureswereliketheopeningoftheheavens。IfeltthatIhadasoul。Hisnobleviews，unfoldedinglorioussentences，elevatedmeintoahigherworld……Theychangedmywholenature。”4
Charactertellsinallconditionsoflife。Themanofgoodcharacterinaworkshopwillgivethetonetohisfellows，andelevatetheirentireaspirations。ThusFranklin，whileaworkmaninLondon，issaidtohavereformedthemannersofanentireworkshop。Sothemanofbadcharacteranddebasedenergywillunconsciouslyloweranddegradehisfellows。CaptainJohnBrown——
the”marching-onBrown”——oncesaidtoEmerson，that”forasettlerinanewcountry，onegoodbelievingmanisworthahundred，nay，worthathousandmenwithoutcharacter。”Hisexampleissocontagious，thatallothermenaredirectlyandbeneficiallyinfluencedbyhim，andheinsensiblyelevatesandliftsthemuptohisownstandardofenergeticactivity。
Communicationwiththegoodisinvariablyproductiveofgood。Thegoodcharacterisdiffusiveinhisinfluence。”Iwascommonclaytillroseswereplantedinme，”sayssomearomaticearthintheEasternfable。Likebegetslike，andgoodmakesgood。”Itisastonishing，”saysCanonMoseley，”howmuchgoodgoodnessmakes。
Nothingthatisgoodisalone，noranythingbad；itmakesothersgoodorothersbad——andthatother，andsoon:likeastonethrownintoapond，whichmakescirclesthatmakeotherwiderones，andthenothers，tillthelastreachestheshore……Almostallthegoodthatisintheworldhas，Isuppose，thuscomedowntoustraditionallyfromremotetimes，andoftenunknowncentresofgood。”5SoMr。Ruskinsays，”Thatwhichisbornofevilbegetsevil；andthatwhichisbornofvalourandhonour，teachesvalourandhonour。”
Henceitisthatthelifeofeverymanisadailyinculcationofgoodorbadexampletoothers。Thelifeofagoodmanisatthesametimethemosteloquentlessonofvirtueandthemostseverereproofofvice。Dr。Hookerdescribedthelifeofapiousclergymanofhisacquaintanceas”visiblerhetoric，”convincingeventhemostgodlessofthebeautyofgoodness。AndsothegoodGeorgeHerbertsaid，onenteringuponthedutiesofhisparish:”Aboveall，Iwillbesuretolivewell，becausethevirtuouslifeofaclergymanisthemostpowerfuleloquence，topersuadeallwhoseeittoreverenceandlove，and——atleasttodesiretolivelikehim。AndthisIwilldo，”headded，”becauseIknowweliveinanagethathathmoreneedofgoodexamplesthanprecepts。”Itwasafinesayingofthesamegoodpriest，whenreproachedwithdoinganactofkindnesstoapoorman，consideredbeneaththedignityofhisoffice，——thatthethoughtofsuchactions”wouldprovemusictohimatmidnight。”6IzaakWaltonspeaksofaletterwrittenbyGeorgeHerberttoBishopAndrewes，aboutaholylife，whichthelatter”putintohisbosom，”andaftershowingittohisscholars，”didalwaysreturnittotheplacewherehefirstlodgedit，andcontinueditso，nearhisheart，tillthelastdayofhislife。”
Greatisthepowerofgoodnesstocharmandtocommand。Themaninspiredbyitisthetruekingofmen，drawingallheartsafterhim。WhenGeneralNicholsonlaywoundedonhisdeathbedbeforeDelhi，hedictatedthislastmessagetohisequallynobleandgallantfriend，SirHerbertEdwardes:-”Tellhim，”saidhe，”I
shouldhavebeenabettermanifIhadcontinuedtolivewithhim，andourheavypublicdutieshadnotpreventedmyseeingmoreofhimprivately。Iwasalwaysthebetterforaresidencewithhimandhiswife，howevershort。Givemylovetothemboth！”
Therearemeninwhosepresencewefeelasifwebreathedaspiritualozone，refreshingandinvigorating，likeinhalingmountainair，orenjoyingabathofsunshine。ThepowerofSirThomasMore’sgentlenaturewassogreatthatitsubduedthebadatthesametimethatitinspiredthegood。LordBrookesaidofhisdeceasedfriend，SirPhilipSidney，that”hiswitandunderstandingbeatuponhisheart，tomakehimselfandothers，notinwordoropinion，butinlifeandaction，goodandgreat。”
Theverysightofagreatandgoodmanisoftenaninspirationtotheyoung，whocannothelpadmiringandlovingthegentle，thebrave，thetruthful，themagnanimous！CbateaubriandsawWashingtononlyonce，butitinspiredhimforlife。Afterdescribingtheinterview，hesays:”Washingtonsankintothetombbeforeanylittlecelebrityhadattachedtomyname。Ipassedbeforehimasthemostunknownofbeings。Hewasinallhisglory——Iinthedepthofmyobscurity。Mynameprobablydweltnotawholedayinhismemory。Happy，however，wasIthathislookswerecastuponme。Ihavefeltwarmedforitalltherestofmylife。Thereisavirtueeveninthelooksofagreatman。”
WhenNiebuhrdied，hisfriend，FrederickPerthes，saidofhim:”Whatacontemporary！Theterrorofallbadandbasemen，thestayofallthesterlingandhonest，thefriendandhelperofyouth。”
Perthessaidonanotheroccasion:”Itdoesawrestlingmangoodtobeconstantlysurroundedbytriedwrestlers；evilthoughtsareputtoflightwhentheeyefallsontheportraitofoneinwhoselivingpresenceonewouldhaveblushedtoownthem。”ACatholicmoney-lender，whenabouttocheat，waswonttodrawaveiloverthepictureofhisfavouritesaint。SoHazlitthassaidoftheportraitofabeautifulfemale，thatitseemedasifanunhandsomeactionwouldbeimpossibleinitspresence。”Itdoesonegoodtolookuponhismanlyhonestface，”saidapoorGermanwoman，pointingtoaportraitofthegreatReformerhunguponthewallofherhumbledwelling。
Eventheportraitofanobleoragoodman，hungupinaroom，iscompanionshipafterasort。Itgivesusacloserpersonalinterestinhim。Lookingatthefeatures，wefeelasifweknewhimbetter，andweremorenearlyrelatedtohim。Itisalinkthatconnectsuswithahigherandbetternaturethanourown。
Andthoughwemaybefarfromreachingthestandardofourhero，weare，toacertainextent，sustainedandfortifiedbyhisdepictedpresenceconstantlybeforeus。
FoxwasproudtoacknowledgehowmuchheowedtotheexampleandconversationofBurke。Ononeoccasionhesaidofhim，that”ifhewastoputallthepoliticalinformationhehadgainedfrombooks，allthathehadlearnedfromscience，orthattheknowledgeoftheworldanditsaffairstaughthim，intoonescale，andtheimprovementhehadderivedfromMr。Burke’sconversationandinstructionintotheother，thelatterwouldpreponderate。”
ProfessorTyndallspeaksofFaraday’sfriendshipas”energyandinspiration。”Afterspendinganeveningwithhimhewrote:”Hisworkexcitesadmiration，butcontactwithhimwarmsandelevatestheheart。Here，surely，isastrongman。Ilovestrength，butletmenotforgettheexampleofitsunionwithmodesty，tenderness，andsweetness，inthecharacterofFaraday。”
Eventhegentlestnaturesarepowerfultoinfluencethecharacterofothersforgood。ThusWordsworthseemstohavebeenespeciallyimpressedbythecharacterofhissisterDorothy，whoexerciseduponhismindandheartalastinginfluence。Hedescribesherastheblessingofhisboyhoodaswellasofhismanhood。Thoughtwoyearsyoungerthanhimself，hertendernessandsweetnesscontributedgreatlytomouldhisnature，andopenhismindtotheinfluencesofpoetry:”Shegavemeeyes，shegavemeears，Andhumblecares，anddelicatefears；
Aheart，thefountainofsweettears，Andloveandthoughtandjoy。”
Thusthegentlestnaturesareenabled，bythepowerofaffectionandintelligence，tomouldthecharactersofmendestinedtoinfluenceandelevatetheirracethroughalltime。
SirWilliamNapierattributedtheearlydirectionofhischaracter，firsttotheimpressmadeuponitbyhismother，whenaboy；andafterwardstothenobleexampleofhiscommander，SirJohnMoore，whenaman。Mooreearlydetectedthequalitiesoftheyoungofficer；andhewasoneofthosetowhomtheGeneraladdressedtheencouragement，”Welldone，mymajors！”atCorunna。
Writinghometohismother，anddescribingthelittlecourtbywhichMoorewassurrounded，hewrote，”Whereshallwefindsuchaking？”ItwastohispersonalaffectionforhischiefthattheworldismainlyindebtedtoSirWilliamNapierforhisgreatbook，’TheHistoryofthePeninsularWar。’Buthewasstimulatedtowritethebookbytheadviceofanotherfriend，thelateLordLangdale，whileonedaywalkingwithhimacrossthefieldsonwhichBelgraviaisnowbuilt。”ItwasLordLangdale，”hesays，”whofirstkindledthefirewithinme。”AndofSirWilliamNapierhimself，hisbiographertrulysays，that”nothinkingpersoncouldevercomeincontactwithhimwithoutbeingstronglyimpressedwiththegeniusoftheman。