Dollycameoutofherroomtotheteaofthegrownups。StepanArkadyevichdidnotcomeout。Hemusthavelefthiswife’sroombyabackdoor。
`Iamafraidyou’llbecoldupstairs,’observedDolly,addressingAnna;`Iwanttomoveyoudownstairs,andweshallbenearer。’
`Oh,please,don’ttroubleaboutme,’answeredAnna,lookingintentlyintoDolly’sface,tryingtomakeoutwhethertherehadbeenareconciliationornot。
`Itwillbelighterforyouhere,’answeredhersister-in-law。
`IassureyouthatIcansleeplikeamarmotanywhereandanytime。’
`What’sallthis?’inquiredStepanArkadyevich,comingoutofhisroomandaddressinghiswife。
FromhistonebothKittyandAnnaatoncegatheredthatareconciliationhadtakenplace。
`IwanttomoveAnnadownstairs,butwemusthangupblinds。Nooneknowshowtodoit;Imustseetoitmyself,’answeredDollyaddressinghim。
`Godknowswhethertheyarefullyreconciled,’thoughtAnna,hearinghertone,coldandcomposed。
`Come,Dolly,whybealwaysmakingdifficulties,’answeredherhusband。`There,I’lldoitall,ifyoulike……’
`Iknowhowyoudoeverything,’answeredDolly。`YoutellMatveitodowhatcan’tbedone,andgoawayyourself,leavinghimtomakeamuddleofeverything,’andherhabitual,mockingsmilecurvedthecornersofDolly’slipsasshespoke。
`Full,fullreconciliation-full,’thoughtAnna,`thankGod!’andrejoicingthatshewasthecauseofit,shewentuptoDollyandkissedher。
`Notatall。WhydoyoualwayslookdownonmeandMatvei?’saidStepanArkadyevich,smilinghardlyperceptibly,andaddressinghiswife。
ThewholeeveningDollywas,asalways,alittlemockinginhertonetoherhusband,whileStepanArkadyevichwashappyandcheerful,yetnotsoastoseemasif,havingbeenforgiven,hehadforgottenhisfault。
Athalf-pastnineo’clockaparticularlyjoyfulandpleasantfamilyconversationovertheteatableattheOblonsky’swasbrokenupbyanapparentlysimpleincident。Butthissimpleincidentforsomereasonstruckeveryoneasstrange。HavingbeguntalkingaboutcommonacquaintancesinPeterburg,Annagotupquickly。
`Sheisinmyalbum,’shesaid;`and,bytheway,I’llshowyoumySeriozha,’sheadded,withamother’ssmileofpride。
Towardteno’clock,whensheusuallysaidgoodnighttoherson,andoften,beforegoingtoaballputhimtobedherself,shefeltdepressedatbeingsofarfromhim;andwhatevershewastalkingabout,shekeptcomingbackinthoughttohercurly-headedSeriozha。Shelongedtolookathisphotographandtalkofhim。Seizingthefirstpretext,shegotup,andwithherlight,resolutestepwentforheralbum。Thestairsuptoherroomcameoutonthelandingofthegreatwarmmainstaircase。
Justasshewasleavingthedrawingroom,aringwasheardinthehall。
`Whocanthatbe?’saidDolly。
`It’stooearlyformetobefetched,andforanyoneelseit’stoolate,’observedKitty。
`It’ssuretobesomeonewithpapersforme,’putinStepanArkadyevich。WhenAnnawaspassingthetopofthestaircase,aservantwasrunninguptoannouncethevisitor,whilethevisitorhimselfwasstandingunderalamp。Anna,glancingdown,atoncerecognizedVronsky,andastrangefeelingofpleasureand,atthesametime,ofsomedread,stirredinherheart。Hestoodthere,withouttakingoffhiscoat,andpullingsomethingoutofhispocket。Attheinstantwhenshewasjusthalfwayupthestairsheraisedhiseyes,caughtsightofher,andtheexpressionofhisfacechangedtoembarrassmentanddismay。Withaslightinclinationofherheadshepassed,hearingbehindherStepanArkadyevich’sloudvoicecallinghimtocomeup,andthequiet,soft,andcalmvoiceofVronskyrefusing。
WhenAnnareturnedwiththealbumhewasalreadygone,andStepanArkadyevichwastellingthemthathehadcalledtoinquireaboutthedinnertheyweregivingnextdaytoaforeigncelebrity。
`Andnothingwouldinducehimtocomeup。Whataqueerfellowheis!’addedStepanArkadyevich。
Kittyblushed。Shethoughtthatshewastheonlypersonwhoknewwhyhehadcome,andwhyhewouldnotcomeup。`Hehasbeenathome,’shethought,`anddidn’tfindme,andthoughtIshouldbehere,buthedidnotcomeupbecausehethoughtitlate,andAnna’shere。’
Allofthemlookedateachother,sayingnothing,andbegantolookatAnna’salbum。
Therewasnothingeitherexceptionalorstrangeinaman’scallingathalf-pastnineonafriendtoinquiredetailsofaproposeddinnerpartyandnotcomingin,yetitseemedstrangetoallofthem。AndtoAnnaitseemedstrangerandmoreunpleasantthantoanyoftheothers。
TheballwasonlyjustbeginningasKittyandhermotherwalkedupthegreatstaircase,floodedwithlight,andlinedwithflowersandfootmeninpowderandredcoats。Fromtheroomscameaconstant,steadynoise,likethatofahiveaswarm;andastheyweregivingthefinallittletouchestohairanddressesbeforeamirroronthelandingbetweenpottedtrees,theyheard,comingfromtheballroom,thegentlydistinctnotesofthefiddlesoftheorchestra,beginningthefirstwaltz。Alittleancientinciviliandress,arranginghisgraycurlsbeforeanothermirror,anddiffusinganodorofscent,stumbledagainstthemonthestairs,andstoodaside,evidentlyadmiringKitty,whomhedidnotknow。Abeardlessyouth,oneofthosesocietyyouthswhomtheoldPrinceShcherbatskycalledwhelps,inanexceedinglyopenwaistcoat,straighteninghiswhitetieashewent,bowedtothemandafterrunningby,camebacktoaskKittyforaquadrille。AsthefirstquadrillehadalreadybeengiventoVronsky,shehadtopromisethisyouththesecond。Anofficer,buttoninghisglove,stoodasideinthedoorway,and,strokinghismustache,admiredtherosyKitty。
Althoughherdress,hercoiffure,andallthepreparationsfortheballhadcostKittymuchtroubleandplanning,atthismomentshewalkedintotheballroomintheelaboratetulledressoverapinkslipasunconcernedlyandsimplyasthoughalltherosettesandlace,alltheminutedetailsofherattire,hadnotcostherorherfamilyamoment’sattention,asthoughshehadbeenborninthistulleandlace,withthistoweringcoiffure,surmountedbyaroseandtwosmallleaves。
When,justbeforeenteringtheballroom,theoldPrincesstriedtoadjustasashribbonthathadbecometwisted,Kittyhaddrawnbackalittle。Shefeltthateverythingmustberightofitself,andgraceful,andthatnothingcouldneedsettingstraight。
Kittyhadoneofhergooddays。Herdresswasnotuncomfortableanywhere;herlaceberthadidnotdroopanywhere;herrosetteswereneithercrushednortornoff;herpinkslipperswithhigh,curvingheelsdidnotpinch,butgladdenedhertinyfeet;andthethickbandeauxoffairhairkeptuponherhead。Allthethreebuttonsbuttonedupwithouttearingonthelongglovethatcoveredherhandwithoutconcealingitslines。Theblackvelvetribbonofherlocketnestledwithspecialtendernessroundherneck。Thisvelvetribbonwasadarling;athome,regardingherneckinthelookingglass,Kittyhadfeltthatthatvelvetwasspeaking。Aboutalltheresttheremightbeadoubt,butthevelvetribbonwasadarling。Kittysmiledheretoo,attheball,whensheglancedatitintheglass。HerbareshouldersandarmsgaveKittyasensationofchillmarble-asensationsheparticularlyliked。Hereyessparkled,andherrosylipscouldnothelpbutsmilefromtheconsciousnessoftheirownattractiveness。Shehadscarcelyenteredtheballroomandreachedthetulle-ribbon-lace-coloredthrongofladies,waitingtobeaskedtodance-Kittywasneveroneofthatthrong-whenshewasaskedforawaltz,andaskedbythebestpartner,thefirststarinthehierarchyoftheballroom,arenownedconductorofthedancesandmasterofceremonies,marriedman,handsomeandwellbuilt,IegorushkaKorsunsky。HehadonlyjustlefttheCountessBanina,withwhomhehaddancedthefirstturnofthewaltz,and,scanninghisdemesne-thatistosay,afewcoupleswhohadstarteddancing-hecaughtsightofKittyentering,andflewuptoherwiththatpeculiar,easyamblewhichisconfinedtoconductorsofthedances。Bowingandwithoutevenaskingherifshecaredtodance,heputouthisarmtoencircleherslenderwaist。Shelookedroundforsomeonetogiveherfanto,andtheirhostess,smilingtoher,tookit。
`Howgoodofyoutocomeingoodtime,’hesaidtoher,embracingherwaist;`suchabadhabittobelate。’
Bendingherleftarm,shelaiditonhisshoulder,andherlittlefeetintheirpinkslippersbeganswiftly,lightly,andrhythmicallymovingovertheslipperyfloorintimetothemusic。
`It’saresttowaltzwithyou,’hesaidtoher,astheyfellintothefirstslowstepsofthewaltz。`It’scharming-suchlightness,precision。’Hesaidtoherthesamethinghesaidtoalmostallhispartnerswhomheknewwell。
Shesmiledathispraise,andcontinuedtolookabouttheroomoverhisshoulder。Shewasnotlikeagirlatherfirstball,forwhomallfacesintheballroommeltintoonevisionoffairyland。Andshewasnotagirlwhohadgonethestaleroundofballstilleveryfaceintheballroomwasfamiliarandtiresome。Butshewasinthemiddlestagebetweenthesetwo;shewasexcited,andatthesametimeshehadsufficientself-possessiontobeabletoobserve。Intheleftcorneroftheballroomshesawtheveryflowerofsocietygroupedtogether。There-impossiblynaked-wasthebeautyLiddy,Korsunsky’swife;therewastheladyofthehouse;thereshonethebaldpateofKrivin,alwaystobefoundwhereverthebestpeoplewere;inthatdirectiongazedtheyoungmen,notventuringtoapproach;there,too,shedescriedStiva,andthereshesawthecharmingfigureandheadofAnnainablackvelvetgown。Andhewasthere。KittyhadnotseenhimsincetheeveningsherefusedLevin。Withherfarsightedeyes,knewhimatonce,andwasevenawarethathewaslookingather。
`Anotherturn,eh?You’renottired?’saidKorsunsky,alittleoutofbreath。
`No,thankyou!’
`WhereshallItakeyou?’
`MadameKarenina’shere,Ithink……Takemetoher。’
`Whereveryoucommand。’
AndKorsunskybeganwaltzingwithmeasuredstepsstraighttowardthegroupintheleftcorner,continuallysaying,`Pardon,mesdames,pardon,pardon,mesdames,’andsteeringhiscoursethroughtheseaoflace,tulleandribbon,andnotdisarrangingafeather,heturnedhispartnersharplyround,sothatherslimankles,inlight,transparentstockings,wereexposedtoview,andhertrainfloatedoutinfanshapeandcoveredKrivin’sknees。Korsunskybowed,setstraighthisopenshirtfront,andgaveherhisarmtoconducthertoAnnaArkadyevna。Kitty,flushed,tookhertrainfromKrivin’sknees,and,alittlegiddy,lookedround,seekingAnna。Annawasnotinlilac,asKittyhadsourgentlywished,butinablack,low-cut,velvetgown,showingherfullshouldersandbosom,thatlookedasthoughcarvedinoldivory,andherroundedarms,withtiny,slenderhands。ThewholegownwastrimmedwithVenetianguipure。Onherhead,amongherblackhair-herown,withnofalseadditions-wasalittlewreathofpansies,andasimilaroneontheblackribbonofhersash,amongwhitelace。Hercoiffurewasnotstriking。Allthatwasnoticeablewasthelittlewillfultendrilsofhercurlyhairthatpersistedinescapingonthenapeofherneck,andonhertemples。Encirclinghersculptured,strongneckwasathreadofpearls。
KittyhadbeenseeingAnnaeveryday;sheadoredher,andhadpicturedherinvariablyinlilac。Butnow,seeingherinblack,shefeltthatshehadnotfullyperceivedhercharm。Shesawhernowassomeonequitenewandsurprisingtoher。NowsheunderstoodthatAnnacouldnothavebeeninlilac,andthathercharmwaspreciselyinthatshealwaysstoodoutagainstherattire,thatherdresscouldneverbenoticeableonher。Andherblackdress,withitssumptuouslace,wasnotnoticeableonher;itwasonlytheframeandallthatwasseenwasshe-simple,natural,elegant,andatthesametimegayandanimated。
Shewasstanding,asalways,veryerect,andwhenKittydrewnearthegroupshewasspeakingtothemasterofthehouse,herheadslightlyturnedtowardhim。
`No,Iwon’tcastastone,’shewassaying,inanswertosomething,`thoughIcan’tunderstanditshewenton,shrugginghershoulders,andsheturnedatoncewithasoftsmileofprotectiontowardKitty。Withacursoryfeminineglanceshescannedherattire,andmadeamovementofherhead,hardlyperceptible,butunderstoodbyKitty,signifyingapprovalofherdressandherlooks。`Youcameintotheroomdancing,’sheadded。
`Thisisoneofmymostfaithfulsupporters,’saidKorsunsky,bowingtoAnnaArkadyevna,whomhehadnotyetseen。`ThePrincesshelpstomakeanyballfestiveandsuccessful。AnnaArkadyevna,awaltz?’hesaid,bendingdowntoher。
`Why,haveyoumet?’inquiredtheirhost。
`Isthereanyonewehavenotmet?MywifeandIarelikewhitewolves-everyoneknowsus,’answeredKorsunsky。`Awaltz,AnnaArkadyevna?’
`Idon’tdancewheneverit’spossiblenotto,’shesaid。
`Buttonightit’simpossible,’answeredKorsunsky。
DuringtheconversationVronskywasapproachingthem。
`Well,sinceit’simpossibletonight,letusstart,’shesaid,notnoticingVronsky’sbow,andhastilyputherhandonKorsunsky’sshoulder。
`Whatisshevexedwithhimabout?’thoughtKitty,discerningthatAnnahadintentionallynotrespondedtoVronsky’sbow。VronskywentuptoKitty,remindingherofthefirstquadrille,andexpressinghisregretatnothavingseenherallthistime。KittygazedinadmirationatAnnawaltzing,asshelistenedtohim。Sheexpectedhimtoaskherforawaltz,buthedidnot,andsheglancedwonderinglyathim。Heflushed,andhurriedlyaskedhertowaltz,buthehadbarelyputhisarmroundherslenderwaistandtakenthefirststepwhenthemusicsuddenlystopped。Kittylookedintohisface,whichwassoclosetoherown,andlongafterward-forseveralyears-thislook,fulloflove,towhichhemadenoresponse,cuthertotheheartwithanagonyofshame。
`Pardon!Pardon!Waltz!Waltz!’shoutedKorsunskyfromtheothersideoftheroom,and,seizingthefirstyoungladyhecameacrosshebegandancing。
VronskyandKittywaltzedseveraltimesroundtheroom。AfterthewaltzKittywenttohermother,andshehadhardlytimetosayafewwordstoCountessNordstonewhenVronskycameupagainforthefirstquadrille。Duringthequadrillenothingofanysignificancewassaid:therewasdisjointedtalkbetweenthemoftheKorsunskys,husbandandwife,whomhedescribedveryamusingly,asdelightfulchildrenatforty,andofthefuturepopulartheater;andonlyoncedidtheconversationtouchhertothequick-whenheaskedherwhetherLevinwerehere,andaddedthathelikedhimverymuch。ButKittydidnotexpectmuchfromthequadrille。Shelookedforwardwithasinkinghearttothemazurka。Shefanciedthatthemazurkawoulddecideeverything。Thefactthathedidnotduringthequadrilleaskherforthemazurkadidnottroubleher。Shefeltsureshewoulddanceitwithhim,asshehaddoneatformerballs,andrefusedfiveyoungmen,sayingshewasengagedforthemazurka。ThewholeballuptothelastquadrillewasforKittyanenchantedvisionofdelightfulcolors,soundsandmotions。Sheonlysatdownwhenshefelttootiredandbeggedforarest。Butasshewasdancingthelastquadrillewithoneofthetiresomeyoungmenwhomshecouldnotrefuse,shechancedtobevis-à-viswithVronskyandAnna。ShehadnotbeennearAnnasincethebeginningoftheevening,andnowsheagainsuddenlysawherasquitenewandsurprising。Shesawinherthesignsofthatexcitementofsuccesssheknewsowellinherself;shesawthatshewasintoxicatedwiththedelightedadmirationshewasexciting。Sheknewthatfeelingandknewitssigns,andsawtheminAnna;sawthequivering,flashinglightinhereyes,andthesmileofhappinessandexcitementunconsciouslycurvingherlips,andthedistinctgrace,precisionandlightnessofhermovements。
`Whoisit?’sheaskedherself。`All-orone?’Andwithoutkeepingupherendoftheconversation,thethreadofwhichtheharassedyoungmanshewasdancingwithlostandcouldnotpickupagain,sheobeyedwithexternallivelinesstheperemptoryshoutsofKorsunskystartingthemallintothegrandrond,andthenintothechaine,andatthesametimeshekeptwatchwithagrowingpangatherheart。`No,it’snotadmirationofthecrowdthathasintoxicatedher,buttheadorationofone。Andthatone?Canitbehe?’EverytimehespoketoAnnathejoyouslightflashedintohereyes,andthesmileofhappinesscurvedherredlips。Sheseemedtomakeanefforttocontrolherself,inordernottoshowthesesignsofdelight,buttheyappearedonherfaceofthemselves。`Butwhatofhim?’Kittylookedathimandwashorrified。WhatwaspicturedsoclearlytoKittyinthemirrorofAnna’sfaceshesawinhim。Whathadbecomeofhisalwayscalm,firmmanner,andthecarelesslycalmexpressionofhisface?Noweverytimeheturnedtoherhebenthishead,asthoughhewouldhavefallenatherfeet,andinhiseyestherewasnothingbuthumblesubmissionanddread。`Iwouldnotoffendyou,’hiseyesseemedtobesayingeachtime,`butIwanttosavemyself,andIdon’tknowhow。’OnhisfacewasalooksuchasKittyhadneverseenbefore。
Theywerespeakingofcommonacquaintances,keepingupthesmallestofsmalltalk,buttoKittyitseemedthateverywordtheysaidwasdeterminingtheirfateandhers。Andstrangelyenough,althoughtheywereactuallytalkingofhowabsurdIvanIvanovichwaswithhisFrench,andhowtheEletskygirlmighthavemadeabettermatch,thesewordswereyetfraughtwithsignificanceforthem,andtheysensedthisasmuchasKittydid。Thewholeball,thewholeworld,everythingseemedscreenedbyafogwithinKitty’ssoul。Nothingbutthesterndisciplineofherbringing-upsupportedherandforcedhertodowhatwasexpectedofher-thatis,todance,toanswerquestions,totalk,eventosmile。Butbeforethemazurka,whentheywerebeginningtorearrangethechairsandafewcouplesmovedoutofthesmallerroomsintothebigroom,amomentofdespairandhorrorcameforKitty。Shehadrefusedfivepartners,andnowshewasnotdancingthemazurka。Shehadnotevenahopeofbeingaskedforit,becauseshewassosuccessfulinsocietythattheideawouldneveroccurtoanyonethatshehadremaineddisengagedtillnow。Shewouldhavetotellhermothershefeltillandgohome,yetshehadnotthestrengthtodothis。Shefeltcrushed。
Shewenttothefarthestendoftheseconddrawingroomandsankintoalowchair。Herlight,transparentskirtsroselikeacloudaboutherslenderwaist;onebare,thin,soft,girlisharm,hanginglistlessly,waslostinthefoldsofherpinktunic;intheothersheheldherfanandwithrapid,shortstrokesfannedherburningface。Yet,whileshelookedlikeabutterflyclingingtoabladeofgrass,andjustabouttoopenitsrainbowwingsforfreshflight,herheartachedwithahorribledespair。
`ButperhapsIamwrong-perhapsitwasnotso?’Andagainsherecalledallshehadseen。
`Kitty,whatisit?’saidCountessNordstone,steppingnoiselesslyoverthecarpettowardher。`Idon’tunderstandit。’
Kitty’slowerlipbegantoquiver;shegotupquickly。
`Kitty,you’renotdancingthemazurka?’
`No,no,’saidKittyinavoiceshakingwithtears。
`Heaskedherforthemazurkainmypresence,’saidCountessNordstone,knowingKittywouldunderstandwhoheandherwere。`Shesaid:``Why,aren’tyougoingtodanceitwithPrincessShcherbatskaia?’’’
`Oh,itdoesn’tmattertome!’answeredKitty。
Noonebutsheherselfunderstoodherposition;nooneknewthatshehadrefusedyesterdaythemanwhomperhapssheloved,andrefusedhimbecauseshehadputherfaithinanother。
CountessNordstonefoundKorsunsky,withwhomshewastodancethemazurka,andtoldhimtoaskKitty。
Kittydancedinthefirstcouple,andluckilyforhershehadnottotalkbecauseKorsunskywasallthetimerunningabout,overseeinghisdemesne。VronskyandAnnaweresittingalmostoppositeher。Shesawthemwithherfarsightedeyes,andsawthem,too,closebywhentheymetinthefigures,andthemoreshesawofthemthemoreconvincedwasshethatherunhappinesswasconsummated。Shesawthattheyfeltthemselvesaloneinthiscrowdedroom。AndonVronsky’sface,alwayssofirmandindependent,shesawthelookthathadstruckher,ofbewildermentandhumblesubmissiveness,liketheexpressionofanintelligentdogwhenithasdonewrong。
Annasmiled-andhersmilewasreflectedbyhim。Shegrewthoughtful-andhebecameserious。SomesupernaturalforcedrewKitty’seyestoAnna’sface。Shewascharminginhersimpleblackdress;charmingwereherroundarmswiththeirbracelets;charmingwasherfirmneckwithitsthreadofpearls;charmingthestrayingcurlsofherloosehair;charmingthegraceful,lightmovementsofherlittlefeetandhands,charmingwasthatlovelyfaceinitsanimation-yettherewassomethingterribleandcruelinhercharm。
Kittyadmiredhermorethanever,andmoreandmoreacutedidhersufferinggrow。Kittyfeltcrushed,andherfaceshowedit。WhenVronskycaughtsightofher,cominguponherinthemazurka,hedidnotatoncerecognizeher,sochangedwasshe。
`Delightfulball!’hesaidtoher,merelyforthesakeofsayingsomething。
`Yes,’sheanswered。
Inthemiddleofthemazurka,repeatingacomplicatedfigure,newlyinventedbyKorsunsky,Annacameforwardintothecenterofthecircle,chosetwogentlemen,andsummonedKittyandanotherlady。Kittygazedatherindismayasshewentup。Annalookedatherwithdroopingeyelids,andsmiled,pressingherhand。But,noticingthatKittyonlyrespondedtohersmilebyalookofdespairandamazement,sheturnedawayfromher,andbegangailytalkingtotheotherlady。
`Yes,thereissomethinguncanny,devilishandcharmingabouther,’saidKittytoherself。
Annadidnotwanttostayforsupper,butthemasterofthehousebeganurgingher。
`Nonsense,AnnaArkadyevna,’saidKorsunskyplacingherbarehanduponhiscoatsleeve。`I’vesuchanideaforacotillon!Unbijou!’
Andhemovedgraduallyon,tryingtodrawheralongwithhim。Theirhostsmiledapprovingly。
`No,I’mnotgoingtostay,’answeredAnna,smiling,but,inspiteofhersmile,bothKorsunskyandthemasterofthehousesawfromherresolutetonethatshewouldnotstay。
`No;why,asitis,IhavedancedmoreatyourballinMoscowthanIhaveallthewinterinPeterburg,’saidAnna,lookingroundatVronsky,whostoodnearher。`Imustrestalittlebeforemyjourney。’
`Areyoudefinitelygoingtomorrowthen?’askedVronsky。
`Yes,Isupposeso,’answeredAnna,asthoughwonderingattheboldnessofhisquestion;buttheirrepressible,quiveringbrillianceofhereyesandhersmilesethimonfireasshesaidit。
AnnaArkadyevnadidnotstaytosupper,butwenthome。
`Yes,theremustbesomethingdisgusting,repulsiveaboutme,’reflectedLevin,ashelefttheShcherbatsky’s,andsetoutonfootforhisbrother’slodgings。`AndIdon’tgetonwithotherpeople。Pride,theysay。No,Ihaven’tevenpride。IfIhadanypride,Ishouldnothaveputmyselfinsuchaposition。’AndhepicturedtohimselfVronsky,happy,good-natured,cleverandcalm-certainlyneverplacedintheawfulpositioninwhichhehadbeenthatevening。`Yes,shewasboundtochoosehim。Itmustbeso,andIcannotcomplainofanyoneoranything。Iammyselftoblame。WhatrighthadItoimagineshewouldcaretojoinherlifetomine?WhoamI,andwhatamI?Anobody,notwantedbyanyone,norofusetoanybody。’AndherecalledhisbrotherNikolai,anddweltwithpleasureonthethoughtofhim。`Isn’therightinsayingthateverythingintheworldisbadandvile?Andarewefairinourjudgment,presentandpast,ofbrotherNikolai?Ofcourse,fromthepointofviewofProcophii,seeinghiminatorncloakandtipsy,he’sadespicableperson。ButIknowhimdifferently。Iknowhissoul,andknowthatwearealike。AndI,insteadofgoingtoseekhimout,wentouttodinner,andthencamehere。’Levinwalkeduptoalamppost,readhisbrother’saddress,whichwasinhispocketbook,andcalledacabby。Allthelongwaytohisbrother’sLevinvividlyrecalledallthefacts,familiartohim,ofhisbrotherNikolai’slife。Herememberedhowhisbrother,whileattheuniversity,andforayearafterward,had,inspiteofthejeersofhiscompanions,livedlikeamonk,strictlyobservingallreligiousrites,servicesandfasts,andavoidingeverysortofpleasure-especiallywomen。Andnow,afterward,hehadallatoncebrokenout:hadassociatedwiththemosthorriblepeople,andrushedintothemostsenselessdebauchery。Herememberedlaterthescandaloveraboy,whomhehadtakenfromthecountrytobringup,and,inafitofrage,hadsoviolentlybeatenthatproceedingswerebroughtagainsthimforpersonalinjury。Thenherememberedthescandalwithasharper,towhomhehadlostmoney,andgivenapromissorynote,andagainstwhomhehadhimselflodgedacomplaint,assertingthathehadcheatedhim。ThiswasthemoneySergeiIvanovichhadpaid。Thenherememberedhowhehadspentanightinapolicestationfordisorderlyconductinthestreet。HerememberedtheshamefulproceedingshehadinstitutedagainsthisbrotherSergeiIvanovich,accusinghimofnothavingpaidhim,apparently,hisshareofhismother’sestate;andthelastscandal,whenhehadgonetoaWesternprovinceinanofficialcapacity,andtherehadgotintotroubleforassaultingavillageelder……Itwasallhorriblyvile,yettoLevinitappearednotatallasvileasitinevitablywouldtothosewhodidnotknowNikolai,didnotknowallhisstory,didnotknowhisheart。
LevinrememberedthatwhenNikolaihadbeeninthedevoutstage,theperiodoffastsandmonksandchurchservices,whenhewasseekinginreligionasupportandacurbforhispassionatetemperament,everyone,farfromencouraginghim,hadjeeredathim-andLevinhad,too,withtheothers。Theyhadteasedhim,callinghimNoahandMonk;yet,whenhehadbrokenout,noonehadhelpedhim,buthadallturnedawayfromhim,withhorrorandloathing。
LevinfeltthatbrotherNikolai,inspiteofalltheuglinessofhislife,inhissoul,intheverydepthsofhissoul,wasnomoreinthewrongthanthepeoplewhodespisedhim。Hewasnottoblameforhavingbeenbornwithhisunbridledcharacterandsomepressureuponhisintellect。Forhehadalwayswantedtobegood。`Iwilltellhimeverything,withoutreserve,andIwillmakehimspeakwithoutreserve,too,andI’llshowhimthatIlovehim,andthereforeunderstandhim,’Levinresolvedtohimself,as,towardeleveno’clock,hereachedthehotelofwhichhehadtheaddress。
`Atthetop,twelveandthirteen,’theporteransweredLevin’sinquiry。
`Athome?’
`Probablyheisathome。’
ThedoorofNo。12washalfopen,and,togetherwithastreakoflight,thereissuedthickfumesofcheap,poortobacco,andthesoundofavoice,unknowntoLevin;butheknewatoncethathisbrotherwasthere:herecognizedhiscough。
Ashewentinatthedoor,theunknownvoicewassaying:
`Italldependswithhowmuchjudgmentandknowledgethething’sdone。’
KonstantinLevinlookedinatthedoor,andsawthatthespeakerwasayoungmanwithanimmenseshockofhair,wearingaRussiancoat,andthatapock-markedyoungwomaninawoollengown,withoutcollarorcuffs,wassittingonthesofa。Hisbrotherwasnottobeseen。Konstantinfeltasharppangathisheartatthethoughtofthestrangecompanyinwhichhisbrotherspenthislife。Noonehadheardhim,andKonstantin,takingoffhisgaloshes,listenedtowhatthegentlemanintheRussiancoatwassaying。Hewasspeakingofsomeenterprise。
`Well,thedevilflaythem,theseprivilegedclasses,’hisbrother’svoiceresponded,withacough。`Masha!getussomesupper,andserveupsomewine,ifthere’sanyleft;orelsesendforsome。’
Thewomanrose,cameoutfrombehindthepartition,andsawKonstantin。
`There’ssomegentlemanhere,NikolaiDmitrievich,’shesaid。
`Whomdoyouwant?’saidthevoiceofNikolaiLevin,angrily。
`It’sI,’answeredKonstantinLevin,comingforwardintothelight。
`Who’sI?’Nikolai’svoicesaidagain,stillmoreangrily。Hecouldbeheardgettinguphurriedly,stumblingagainstsomething,andLevinsaw,facinghiminthedoorway,thebigscaredeyes,andthehuge,gaunt,stoopingfigureofhisbrother,sofamiliar,andyetastonishinginitsoddityandsickliness。
Hewaseventhinnerthanthreeyearsbefore,whenKonstantinLevinhadseenhimlast。Hewaswearingashortcoat,andhishandsandbigbonesseemedhugerthanever。Hishairhadgrownthinner,thesamestraightmustachehidhislips,thesameeyesgazedstrangelyandnaivelyathisvisitor。
`Ah,Kostia!’heexclaimedsuddenly,recognizinghisbrother,andhiseyeslightedupwithjoy。Butthesamesecondhelookedroundattheyoungman,andgavethenervousjerkofhisheadandneckthatKonstantinknewsowell,asifhiscravatwerechokinghim;andaquitedifferentexpression-wild,sufferingandcruel-restedonhisemaciatedface。
`IwrotetoyouandSergeiIvanovichboththatIdon’tknowyou,anddon’twanttoknowyou。Whatisityouwant?’
HewasnotatallthesameasKonstantinhadbeenfancyinghim。Theworstandmostoppressivepartofhischaracter,whichmadeallrelationswithhimsodifficult,hadbeenforgottenbyKonstantinLevinwhenhethoughtofhim;andnow,whenhesawhisface,andespeciallythatnervoustwitchingofhishead,heremembereditall。
`Ididn’twanttoseeyouforanything,’heansweredtimidly。`I’vesimplycometoseeyou。’
Hisbrother’stimidityobviouslysoftenedNikolai。Hislipstwitched。
`Oh,sothat’sit?’hesaid。`Well,comein;sitdown。Likesomesupper?Masha,bringsupperforthree。No,stopaminute。Doyouknowwhothisis?’hesaid,addressinghisbrother,andindicatingthegentlemanintheRussiancoat:`ThisisMr。Kritsky,afriendofmyKievdays-averyremarkableman。He’spersecutedbythepolice,ofcourse,sincehe’snotascoundrel。’
Andhesurveyed,asitwasahabitofhis,everyoneintheroom。Seeingthatthewomanstandinginthedoorwaywasstartingtogo,heshoutedtoher。`Waitaminute,Isaid。’Andwiththatinabilitytoexpresshimself,theincoherencethatKonstantinknewsowell,hebegan,withanotherlookroundateveryone,totellKritsky’sstorytohisbrother:howhehadbeenexpelledfromtheuniversityforstartingabenevolentsocietyforthepoorstudents,andclassesonSunday,andhowhehadafterwardbeenateacherinaruralschool,andhadbeendrivenoutofthat,too;andhadafterwardbeenontrialforsomethingorother。
`You’reoftheKievUniversity?’saidKonstantinLevintoKritsky,tobreaktheawkwardsilencethatfollowed。
`Yes-IwasinKiev,’Kritskyrepliedangrily,hisfacedarkening。
`Andthiswoman,’NikolaiLevininterruptedhim,pointingtoher,`ismylifemate,MaryaNikolaevna。Itookheroutofadive,andhejerkedhisneckashesaidit。`ButIloveherandrespecther,andanyonewhowantstoknowme,’headded,raisinghisvoiceandknittinghisbrows,`isrequestedtoloveherandrespecther。She’spreciselythesameasawifetome-precisely。Sonowyouknowwhomyou’vegottodowith。Andifyouthinkyou’reloweringyourself-well,there’sthedoor,andGodspeedthee!’
Andagainhiseyestraveledinquiringlyoverallofthem。
`ButhowwillIlowermyself?Idon’tunderstand。’
`Then,Masha,tellthemtobringsupper;threeportions,andvodkaandwine……No,waitaminute……No,itdoesn’tmatter……Goahead。’
`Soyousee,’pursuedNikolaiLevin,painfullywrinklinghisforeheadandtwitching。
Itwasobviouslydifficultforhimtothinkofwhattosayanddo。
`Here,doyousee?……Hepointedtosomesortofshortironbars,fastenedtogetherwithtwine,lyinginacorneroftheroom。`Doyouseethat?That’sthebeginningofanewenterprisewe’regoinginto。Thisenterprisewillbeanindustrialassociation……’
Konstantinscarcelyheardhim。Helookedintohissickly,consumptiveface,andhewasmoreandmoresorryforhim,andhecouldnotforcehimselftolistentowhathisbrotherwastellinghimabouttheassociation。Hesawthatthisassociationwasamereanchortosavehimfromself-contempt。NikolaiLevinwentontalking:
`Youknowthatcapitaloppressestheworker。Ourworkers,themouzhiks,bearalltheburdenoflabor,andaresoplacedthat,nomatterhowmuchtheywork,theycan’tescapefromtheirpositionofbeastsofburden。Alltheprofitsoflabor,onwhichtheymightimprovetheirposition,andgainleisureforthemselves,andafterthateducation-allthesurplusvalues,aretakenfromthembythecapitalists。Andsocietyissoconstitutedthatthehardertheywork,thegreatertheprofitofthemerchantsandlandowners,whiletheystaybeastsofburdentotheend。Andthatstateofthingsmustbechanged,’hefinishedup,andlookedquestioninglyathisbrother。
`Yes,ofcourse,’saidKonstantin,lookingatthepatchofredthathadcomeoutonhisbrother’sprojectingcheekbones。
`Andsowe’refoundingalocksmith’sassociation,wherealltheproductionandprofit,andthechiefinstrumentsofproduction-everything-willbeincommon。’
`Whereistheassociationtobe?’askedKonstantinLevin。
`InthevillageofVozdrem,governmentofKazan。’
`Butwhyinavillage?Inthevillages,Ithink,thereisplentyofworkasitis。Whyalocksmith’sassociationinavillage?’
`Why?Becausethepeasantsarejustasmuchslavesastheyeverwere,andthat’swhyyouandSergeiIvanovichdon’tlikepeopletotryandgetthemoutoftheirslavery,’saidNikolaiLevin,exasperatedbytheobjection。
KonstantinLevinsighed,lookingmeanwhileaboutthecheerlessanddirtyroom。ThissighseemedtoexasperateNikolaistillmore。
`IknowSergeiIvanovich’s,andyour,aristocraticviews。Iknowthatheappliesallthepowerofhisintellecttojustifyexistingevils。’
`Isay,whydoyoutalkofSergeiIvanovich?’Levinletdrop,smiling。
`SergeiIvanovich?I’lltellyouwhy!’NikolaiLevinshriekedsuddenlyatthenameofSergeiIvanovich。`I’lltellyouwhy……Butwhat’stheuseoftalking?There’sonlyonething……Whatdidyoucometomefor?Youlookdownonallthis;verywell,then;butgoaway,inGod’sname-goaway!’heshrieked,gettingupfromhischair。`Goaway-goaway!’
`Idon’tlookdownonitatall,’saidKonstantinLevintimidly。`Idon’tevendisputeit。’
AtthatinstantMaryaNikolaevnacameback。NikolaiLevinlookedroundangrilyather。Shewentquicklytohim,andwhisperedsomething。
`I’mnotwell;I’vegrownirritable,’saidNikolaiLevin,gettingcalmerandbreathingpainfully;`andthenyoutalktomeofSergeiIvanovichandhisessay。It’ssuchrubbish,suchlying,suchself-deception!Whatcanamanwriteaboutjusticewhoknowsnothingofit?Haveyoureadhisessay?’heturnedtoKritsky,sittingdownagainatthetable,andclearingaspaceforhimselfbypushingbacksomehalf-madecigarettes。
`Ihaven’t,’Kritskyrespondedgloomily,obviouslynotdesiringtoenterintotheconversation。
`Whynot?’saidNikolaiLevin,nowturningwithexasperationuponKritsky。
`BecauseIdidn’tseetheuseofwastingmytimeoverit。’
`Oh,ifyouplease-howdidyouknowitwouldbewastingyourtime?Thatessay’stoodeepformanypeople-thatistosay,it’sovertheirheads。Butit’sdifferentwithme,Iseethroughhisideas,andIknowwhereintheessay’sweaknesslies。’
Theyallfellsilent。Kritskygotupsluggishlyandreachedforhiscap。
`Won’tyouhavesupper?Allright,good-by!Comeroundtomorrowwiththelocksmith。’
KritskyhadhardlygoneoutwhenNikolaiLevinsmiledandwinked。
`He,too,ispoorstuff,’hesaid。`ForIcansee……’
ButatthatinstantKritsky,atthedoor,calledhim。
`Whatdoyouwantnow?’hesaid,andwentouttohiminthepassage。LeftalonewithMaryaNikolaevna,Levinturnedtoher。
`Haveyoubeenlongwithmybrother?’hesaidtoher。
`Yes,morethanayear。Hishealthhasbecomeverypoor。Hedrinksagreatdeal,’shesaid。
`Justhow?’
`Hedrinksvodka,andit’sbadforhim。’
`Andagreatdeal?’whisperedLevin。
`Yes,’shesaid,lookingtimidlytowardthedoorway,whereNikolaiLevinhadreappeared。
`Whatwereyoutalkingabout?’hesaid,knittinghisbrows,andturninghisscaredeyesfromonetotheother。`Whatwasit?’
`Oh,nothing,’Konstantinansweredinconfusion。
`Oh,ifyoudon’twanttosay,don’t。Onlyit’snogoodyourtalkingtoher。She’sawench,andyou’reagentleman,’hesaid,withajerkoftheneck。`Youunderstandeverything,Isee,andhavetakenstockofeverything,andlookwithcommiserationonmytransgressions,’hebeganagain,raisinghisvoice。
`NikolaiDmitrich,NikolaiDmitrich,’whisperedMaryaNikolaevna,againgoinguptohim。
`Oh,verywell,verywell!……Butwhere’sthesupper?Ah,hereitis,’hesaid,seeingawaiterwithatray。`Here,setithere,’headdedangrily,andpromptlyseizingthevodka,hepouredoutaponyanddrankitgreedily。`Likeadrink?’heturnedtohisbrother,andatoncebecamebetter-humored。`Well,enoughofSergeiIvanovich。I’mgladtoseeyou,anyway。Afterall’ssaidanddone,we’renotstrangers。Come,haveadrink。Tellmewhatyou’redoing,’hewenton,greedilymunchingapieceofbread,andpouringoutanotherpony。`Howarethingswithyou?’
`Ilivealoneinthecountry,asIalwayshave。I’mbusylookingaftertheland,’answeredKonstantin,watchingwithhorrorthegreedinesswithwhichhisbrotherateanddrank,andtryingtoconcealthathenoticedit。
`Whydon’tyougetmarried?’
`Noopportunityhaspresenteditself,’Konstantinanswered,reddening。
`Whynot?Formenow,everything’satanend!I’vemadeamessofmylife。ButthisI’vesaid,andIsaystill,thatifmysharehadbeengivenmewhenIneededit,mywholelifewouldhavebeendifferent。’
Konstantinmadehastetochangetheconversation。
`DoyouknowyourlittleVania’swithme-aclerkinthecountinghouseatPokrovskoe?’
Nikolaijerkedhisneck,andsankintothought。
`Yes,tellmewhat’sgoingonatPokrovskoe。Isthehousestillstanding,andthebirchtrees,andourschoolroom?AndPhilipthegardener-isheliving?HowIrememberthesummerhouseandthesofa!Nowmindanddon’talteranythinginthehouse,butmakehasteandgetmarried,andmakeeverythingasitusedtobeagain。ThenI’llcomeandseeyou,ifyourwifeisafinewoman。’
`Why,cometomenow,’saidLevin。`Howsnuglywecouldsettledown!’
`I’dcomeandseeyouifIweresureIshouldn’tfindSergeiIvanovich。’
`Youwouldn’tfindhimthere。Ilivequiteindependentlyofhim。’
`Yes,butsaywhatyoulike,youhavetochoosebetweenmeandhim,’hesaid,lookingtimidlyintohisbrother’sface。
ThistimiditytouchedKonstantin。
`Ifyouwanttohearmyconfessionoffaithonthesubject,ItellyouthatinyourquarrelwithSergeiIvanovichItakeneitherside。You’rebothwrong。You’reratherwrongoutwardly,andhe,ratherinwardly。’
`Ah,ah!Youseethat,youseethat!’Nikolaishoutedjoyfully。
`ButIpersonallyvaluefriendlyrelationswithyoumorebecause……’
`Why,why?’
KonstantincouldnotsaythathevalueditmorebecauseNikolaiwasunhappy,andneededaffection。ButNikolaiknewthatthiswasjustwhathemeanttosay,andscowlinghetooktothevodkaagain。
`Enough,NikolaiDmitrich!’saidMaryaNikolaevna,stretchingoutherplump,barearmtowardthedecanter。
`Letitbe!Don’tannoyme!I’llbeatyou!’heshouted。
MaryaNikolaevnasmiledasweetandgood-humoredsmile,whichwasatoncereflectedonNikolai’sface,andwhiskedthedecanteroff。
`Anddoyousupposesheunderstandsnothing?’saidNikolai。`Sheunderstandseverythingbetterthanallofus。Tellthetruth-isn’ttheresomethinggoodandsweetabouther?’
`WereyouneverbeforeinMoscow?’Konstantinsaidtoher,forthesakeofsayingsomething。
`Onlyyoumustn’tbeformalwithher。Itfrightensher。Nooneeverspoketohersobutthejusticeofthepeacewhotriedherfortryingtogetoutofahouseofillfame。MyGod,whatsenselessnessthereisinthisworld!’hecriedsuddenly。`Thesenewinstitutions,thesejusticesofthepeace,theseZemstvo-whathideousnessitallis!’
Andhebegantoenlargeonhisencounterswiththenewinstitutions。
KonstantinLevinlistenedtohim,andthatdisbeliefinthesenseofallpublicinstitutions,whichhesharedwithhim,andoftenexpressed,wasnowdistastefultohim,comingfromhisbrother’slips。
`Intheotherworldweshallunderstanditall,’hesaidlightly。
`Intheotherworld?Ah,Idon’tlikethatotherworld!Idon’tlikeit,’hesaid,lettinghisscaredwildeyesrestonhisbrother’sface。`Hereonewouldthinkthattogetoutofallthebasenessandthemess,one’sownandotherpeople’s,wouldbeagoodthing,andyetI’mafraidofdeath,awfullyafraidofdeath。’Heshuddered。`Butdodrinksomething。Wouldyoulikesomechampagne?Orshallwegosomewhere?Let’sgotothegypsies!Doyouknow,I’vegottenveryfondofthegypsies,andofRussiansongs。’
Hisspeechhadbeguntofalter,andheskippedatrandomfromonesubjecttoanother。Konstantin,withthehelpofMasha,persuadedhimnottogooutanywhere,andgothimtobedhopelesslydrunk。
MashapromisedtowritetoKonstantinincaseofneed,andtopersuadeNikolaitogoandstaywithhisbrother。
InthemorningKonstantinLevinleftMoscow,andtowardeveninghereachedhome。Onthejourneyinthetrainhetalkedtohisfellowtravelersaboutpoliticsandthenewrailways,and,justasinMoscow,hewasovercomebyasenseofconfusionofideas,bydissatisfactionwithhimself,andshameofsomethingorother。Butwhenhegotoutathisownstation,whenhesawhisone-eyedcoachmanIgnat,withthecollarofhiscoatturnedup;when,inthedimlightfallingthroughthestationwindows,hesawhisowncarpetedsledge,hisownhorseswiththeirtailsup,intheirharnesstrimmedwithringsandtassels;whenthecoachmanIgnat,asheputinhisluggage,toldhimthevillagenews-thatthecontractorhadarrived,andthatPavahadcalved-hefeltthatlittlebylittletheconfusionwasclearingup,andtheshameandself-dissatisfactionwerepassingaway。HefeltthisatthemeresightofIgnatandthehorses;buthebegantoseewhathadhappenedtohiminquiteadifferentlight,whenhehadputonthesheepskincoatbroughtforhim,and,allmuffledup,hadtakenhisseatinthesleighandstartedoff,ponderingontheworkthatlaybeforehiminthevillage,andstaringattheoffhorse,thathadbeenformerlyhissaddlehorse,overridden,butaspiritedanimalfromtheDon。Hefelthimself,anddidnotwanttobeanyoneelse。Allhewantednowwastobebetterthanbefore。Inthefirstplace,heresolvedthatfromthatdayonhewouldgiveuphopingfortheextraordinaryhappinesswhichthemarriagewastoaffordhim,andconsequentlyhewouldnotdisdainthepresentso。Inthesecondplace,hewouldneveragainlethimselfgivewaytolowpassion,thememoryofwhichhadsotorturedhimwhenhehadbeenmakinguphismindtopropose。Then,rememberinghisbrotherNikolai,heresolvedthathewouldneverallowhimselftoforgethim,thathewouldwatchhim,andnotlosesightofhim,soastobereadytohelpshouldthingsgoillwithhim。Andthatwouldbesoon,hefelt。Then,too,hisbrother’stalkofcommunism,whichhehadtreatedsolightlyatthetime,nowmadehimreflect。Heconsideredanalterationineconomicconditionsnonsense;yethehadalwaysfelttheinjusticeofhisownabundanceincomparisonwiththepovertyofthecommonfolk,andhenowdeterminedthat,inordertofeelquiteintheright,thoughhehadworkedhardandlivedbynomeansluxuriouslybefore,hewouldnowworkstillharder,andwouldallowhimselfevenlessluxury。Andallthisseemedtohimsoeasyaconquestoverhimselfthathespentthewholedriveinmostpleasantreveries。Withalivelyfeelingofhopeinanew,betterlife,hedroveuptohishouseaboutnineo’clockatnight。
Thesnowofthelittlequadranglebeforethehousewaslitupbylightfallingfromthewindowsintheroomofhisoldnurse,AgathyaMikhailovna,whoperformedthedutiesofhousekeeperinhishouse。Shewasnotyetasleep。Kouzma,awakenedbyher,sleepyandbarefooted,ranoutontothesteps。Asetterbitch,Laska,leapedouttoo,almostupsettingKouzma,andwhining,rubbedagainstLevin’sknees,jumpingupandlonging,yetnotdaring,toputherforepawsonhischest。
`You’resoonreturned,mydear,’saidAgathyaMikhailovna。
`Igrewhomesick,AgathyaMikhailovna。EastorWest,homeisbest,’heanswered,andwentintohisstudy。
Thestudywasgraduallylitupasthecandlewasbroughtin。Thefamiliardetailscameout:thestag’shorns;thebookshelves;theplainstovewithitswarm-hole,whichhadlongwantedmending;hisfather’ssofa,alargetable,and,onthetable,anopenbook,abrokenashtray,anotebookwithhishandwriting。Ashesawallthis,therecameoverhimforaninstantadoubtofthepossibilityofarrangingthenewlife,ofwhichhehadbeendreamingontheroad。Allthesetracesofhislifeseemedtoclutchhim,andtosaytohim:`No,you’renotgoingtogetawayfromus,andyou’renotgoingtobedifferent-butyou’regoingtobethesameasyou’vealwaysbeen:withdoubts,everlastingdissatisfactionwithyourself,vaineffortstoamend,andlapses,andeverlastingexpectationofahappinesswhichyouwon’tget,andwhichisn’tpossibleforyou。’
Butitwashisthingsthatsaidthistohim,whileanothervoiceinhisheartwastellinghimthathemustnotfallundertheswayofthepast,andthatonecandoanythingwithoneself。Andhearingthatvoice,hewentintothecornerwherestoodhistwodumbbells,ofonepoodeach,andbeganjerkingandpushingthemup,tryingtoinduceastateofwell-being。Therewasacreakofstepsatthedoor。Hehastilyputdownthedumbbells。
Thebailiffcamein,andsaidthateverything,thankGod,waswell,butalsoinformedhimthatthebuckwheatinthenewdryingmachinehadbeenalittlescorched。ThispieceofnewsirritatedLevin。ThenewdryingmachinehadbeenconstructedandpartlyinventedbyLevin。Thebailiffhadalwaysbeenagainstthisdryingmachine,andnowitwaswithsuppressedtriumphthatheannouncedthatthebuckwheathadbeenscorched。Levinwasfirmlyconvincedthatifthebuckwheathadbeenscorcheditwasonlybecauseprecautionshadnotbeentaken,forwhichhehadhundredsoftimesgivenorders。Hewasannoyed,andreprimandedthebailiff。Buttherehadbeenanimportantandjoyfulevent:Pava,hisbestcow,anexpensivebeast,boughtatashow,hadcalved。
`Kouzma,givememysheepskincoat。Andyou,dotellthemtofetchalantern-I’mgoingtohavealookather,’hesaidtothebailiff。
Thecowhouseforthemorevaluablecowswasjustbehindthehouse。Walkingacrosstheyard,passingasnowdriftbythelilactree,hewentintothecowhouse。Therecameawarm,steamysmellofdungwhenthefrozendoorwasopened,andthecows,astonishedattheunfamiliarlightofthelantern,stirredontheirfreshstraw。Hecaughtaglimpseofthebroad,smooth,blackandpiebaldbackofaDutchcow。Berkoot,thebull,waslyingdownwithhisringinhislip,andseemedabouttogetup,butthoughtbetterofit,andonlygavetwosnortsastheypassedbyhim。Pava,thereddishbeauty,hugeasahippopotamus,withherbackturnedtothem,screenedhercalffromthearrivalsandsniffeditallover。
Levinwentintothestall,lookedPavaover,andheftedthereddishandred-dappledcalfuponitsunsteady,spindlylegs。Pava,uneasy,beganlowing,butwhenLevinputthecalfclosetohershewassoothed,and,sighingheavily,beganlickingherwithherroughtongue。Thecalffumbling,pokeditsnoseunderitsmother’sgroin,andtwirleditstinytail。
`Bringthelighthere,Fiodor-bringthelanternhere,’saidLevin,examiningtheheifer。`Likethedam!thoughthecolortakesafterthesire。Aperfectbeauty!Long,andbroadinthehaunch。Isn’tsheabeautynow,VassiliiFiodorovich?’headdressedthebailiff,quiteforgivinghimforthebuckwheatundertheinfluenceofhisdelightintheheifer。
`Whatbadbloodcouldshetakeafter?-Semionthecontractorcamethedayafteryouleft。Youmustsettlewithhim,KonstantinDmitrich,’saidthebailiff。`AndIhavealreadytoldyouaboutthemachine。’
ThismatteralonewasenoughtobringLevinbacktoallthedetailsofhisestate,whichwasonalargescale,andcomplicated。Hewentstraightfromthecowhousetothecountinghouse,and,afterashorttalkwiththebailiffandSemionthecontractor,hewentbacktothehouseandstraightupstairstothedrawingroom。
Thehousewasbigandold-fashioned,andLevin,thoughhelivedalone,heatedandusedthewholehouse。Heknewthatthiswasstupid,heknewthatitwasevenwrong,andcontrarytohispresentnewplans,butthishousewasawholeworldtoLevin。Itwastheworldinwhichhisfatherandmotherhadlivedanddied。TheyhadlivedjustthelifethattoLevinseemedtheidealofperfection,andthathehaddreamedofrenewingwithhiswife,withhisfamily。
Levinscarcelyrememberedhismother。Hisconceptionofherwasforhimasacredmemory,andhisfuturewifewasboundtobe,inhisimagination,arepetitionofthatexquisite,holyidealofawomanthathismotherhadbeen。
Hewassofarfromconceivingofloveforwomanapartfrommarriagethathepositivelypicturedtohimselffirstthefamily,andonlysecondarilythewomanwhowouldgivehimafamily。Hisideasofmarriagewere,consequently,quiteunlikethoseofthegreatmajorityofhisacquaintances,forwhomgettingmarriedwasmerelyoneofthemanyaffairsofeverydaylife。ForLevinitwasthechiefaffairoflife,onwhichitswholehappinessturned。Andnowhehadtogiveupthat!
Whenhehadgoneintotheseconddrawingroom,wherehealwayshadtea,andhadsettledhimselfinhisarmchairwithabook,andAgathyaMikhailovnahadbroughthimtea,andwithherusual,`Well,I’llstayawhile,mydear,’hadtakenachairatthewindow,hefeltthat,howeverstrangeitmightbe,hehadnotpartedfromhisdaydreams,andthathecouldnotlivewithoutthem。Whetherwithher,orwithanother-itwasstillboundtobe。Hewasreadinghisbook,ponderingonwhathewasreading,andpausingtolistentoAgathyaMikhailovna,whogossipedawaywithoutflagging,andyet,withallthat,allsortsofpicturesofhisworkandafuturefamilyliferosedisconnectedlybeforehisimagination。Hefeltthatinthedepthofhissoulsomethingwassteadying,settlingdown,andabating。
HeheardAgathyaMikhailovnatalkingofhowProkhorhadforgottenhisdutytoGod,and,withthemoneyLevinhadgivenhimtobuyahorse,hadbeendrinkingwithoutaletup,andhadbeatenhiswifetillhe’dhalf-killedher。Helistened,andreadhisbook,andrecalledthewholetrainofideassuggestedbyhisreading。ItwasTyndall’sTreatiseonHeat。HerecalledhisowncriticismsofTyndallforhisself-complacencyintheclevernessofhisexperiments,andforhislackofphilosophicinsight。Andsuddenlytherefloatedintohismindthejoyfulthought:`Intwoyear’stimeIshallhavetwoDutchcowsinmyherd;Pavaherselfwillperhapsstillbealive;adozenyoungdaughtersofBerkoot,andthesethreeaddedforshow-itwouldbemarvelous!’Hetookuphisbookagain。`Nowwell,electricityandheatarethesamething;butisitpossibletosubstituteonequantityfortheotherinanequationforthesolutionofanyproblem?No。Well,thenwhatofit?Theconnectionbetweenalltheforcesofnatureisfeltinstinctively,anyway……It’llbeparticularlypleasantwhenPava’sdaughterwillbeared-dappledcowlikealltheherd,towhichtheotherthreeshouldbeadded!Splendid!I’llgooutwithmywifeandvisitorstomeettheherd……Mywifesays,``KostiaandIlookedafterthatheiferlikeachild。’’``Howcanitinterestyousomuch?’’saysavisitor。``Everythingthatinterestshim,interestsme。’’Butwhowillshebe?’AndherememberedwhathadhappenedatMoscow……`Well,there’snothingtobedone……It’snotmyfault。Butnoweverythingshallgooninanewway。It’snonsensetopretendthatlifewon’tletone,thatthepastwon’tletone。Onemuststruggletolivebetter-farbetter……’Heraisedhishead,andsankintothought。OldLaska,whohadnotyetfullydigestedherdelightathisreturn,andhadrunoutintotheyardtobark,camebackwagginghertail,andcreptuptohim,bringinginthescentofthefreshair,putherheadunderhishand,andyelpedplaintively,askingtobestroked。
`Ifshecouldbutspeak,’saidAgathyaMikhailovna。`Eventhoughit’sadog……Yetsheunderstandsthathermaster’scomehome,andthathe’slow-spirited。’
`Whylow-spirited?’
`DoyousupposeIdon’tseeit,mydear?It’shightimeIshouldknowthegentlefolk。Why,I’vegrownupfromalittlethingwiththem。Nevermind,sir,solongasonehashealthandaclearconscience。’
Levinlookedintentlyather,surprisedathowwellshehadfathomedhisthoughts。
`ShallIfetchyouanothercup?’sheaskedand,takinghiscup,wentout。
Laskakeptpokingherheadunderhishand。Hestrokedher,andshepromptlycurledupathisfeet,layingherheadonaprotrudinghand-paw。Andintokenofallnowbeingwellandsatisfactory,sheopenedhermouthalittle,smackedherlips,andsettlingherstickylipsmorecomfortablyaboutheroldteeth,shesankintoblissfulrespose。Levinwatchedherlastmovementsattentively。
`That’swhatI’lldo,’hesaidtohimself;`that’swhatI’lldo!Nevermind……All’swell。’
Aftertheball,earlynextmorning,AnnaArkadyevnasentherhusbandatelegramthatshewasleavingMoscowthesameday。
`No,Imustgo,Imustgo’;sheexplainedthechangeinherplanstohersister-in-law,inatonethatsuggestedthatshehadtoremembersomanythingsthattherewasnoenumeratingthem:`no,really,ithadbetterbetoday!’
StepanArkadyevichwasnotdiningathome,buthepromisedtocomeandseehissisteroffatseveno’clock。
Kitty,too,didnotcome,sendinganotethatshehadaheadache。DollyandAnnadinedalonewiththechildrenandtheEnglishgoverness。Whetheritwasbecausechildrenarefickle,orbecausetheyhaveacutesenses,andtheyfeltthatAnnawasquitedifferentthatdayfromwhatshehadbeenwhentheyhadtakensuchafancytoher,thatshewasnotnowinterestedinthem-theyhadabruptlydroppedtheirplaywiththeiraunt,andtheirloveforher,andwerequiteindifferenttoherleaving。Annawasabsorbedthewholemorninginpreparationsforherdeparture。ShewrotenotestoherMoscowacquaintances,jotteddownheraccounts,andpacked。AltogetherDollyfanciedshewasnotinaplacidstateofmind,butinthatworriedmoodwhichDollyknewsowellinherowncase,andwhichdoesnotcomewithoutcause,andforthemostpartcoversdissatisfactionwithoneself。Afterdinner,Annawentuptoherroomtodress,andDollyfollowedher。
`Howqueeryouaretoday!’Dollysaidtoher。
`I?Doyouthinkso?I’mnotqueer,butI’mnasty。Iamlikethatsometimes。IkeepfeelingasifIcouldcry。It’sverystupid,butit’llpassoff,’saidAnnaquickly,andshebentherflushedfaceoveratinybaginwhichshewaspackinganightcapandsomecambrichandkerchiefs。Hereyeswereparticularlybright,andwerecontinuallydimmedwithtears。`InthesamewayIdidn’twanttoleavePeterburg-andnowIdon’twanttogoawayfromhere。’
`Youcamehereanddidagooddeed,’saidDolly,lookingintentlyather。
Anna’seyeswerewetwithtearsasshelookedather。
`Don’tsaythat,Dolly。I’vedonenothing,andcoulddonothing。Ioftenwonderwhypeopleareallinleaguetospoilme。WhathaveIdone,andwhatcouldIdo?Inyourhearttherewasfoundloveenoughtoforgive……’
Ifithadnotbeenforyou,Godknowswhatwouldhavehappened!Howhappyyouare,Anna!’saidDolly。`Everythingisclearandgoodinyourheart。’
`Everyhearthasitsownskeleton,astheEnglishsay。’
`Youhavenosortofskeleton,haveyou?Everythingissoclearinyou。’
`Ihave!’saidAnnasuddenly,and,unexpectedlyafterhertears,asly,mockingsmilepuckeredherlips。
`Come,he’samusing,anyway,yourskeleton,andnotdepressing,’saidDolly,smiling。
`No,heisdepressing。DoyouknowwhyI’mgoingtodayinsteadoftomorrow?Thisisaconfessionthatweighsonme;Iwanttomakeyouitsrecipient,’saidAnnaresolutelylettingherselfdropintoanarmchair,andlookingstraightintoDolly’sface。
AndtohersurpriseDollysawthatAnnawasblushinguptoherears,uptothecurlyblackringletsonherneck。
`Yes,’Annawenton。`DoyouknowwhyKittydidn’tcometodinner?She’sjealousofme。Ihavespoiled……I’vebeenthecauseofthatballbeingatorturetoherinsteadofapleasure。Buttruly,truly,it’snotmyfault,oronlymyfaultalittlebit,’shesaid,daintilydrawlingthewords`alittlebit。’
`Oh,howlikeStivayousaidthat!’saidDolly,laughing。
Annawashurt。
`Ohno,ohno!I’mnotStiva,’shesaid,knittingherbrows。`That’swhyI’mtellingyou,justbecauseIdonotevenforaninstantpermitmyselftodoubtaboutmyself,’saidAnna。
Butattheverymomentshewasutteringthewords,shefeltthattheywerenottrue。Shewasnotmerelydoubtingaboutherself-shefeltemotionatthethoughtofVronsky,andwasgoingawaysoonerthanshehadmeant,solelytoavoidmeetinghim。
`Yes,Stivatoldmeyoudancedthemazurkawithhim,andthathe……’
`Youcan’timaginehowabsurdlyitallcameabout。Ionlymeanttobematchmaking,andallatonceitturnedoutquitedifferently。Possiblyagainstmyownwill……’
Sheflushedandstopped。
`Oh,theyfeelitimmediately!’saidDolly。
`ButIshouldbeindespairiftherewereanythingseriousinitonhisside,’Annainterruptedher。`AndI’mcertainitwillallbeforgotten,andKittywillleaveoffhatingme。’
`Allthesame,Anna,totellyouthetruth,I’mnotveryanxiousforthismarriageforKitty。Andit’sbetteritshouldcometonothing,ifhe,Vronsky,iscapableoffallinginlovewithyouinasingleday。’
`Oh,heavens,thatwouldbetoosilly!’saidAnna,andagainadeepflushofpleasureappearedonherface,assheheardtheideathatabsorbedherputintowords。`AndsohereIam,goingaway,havingmadeanenemyofKitty,whomIlikedsomuch!Ah,howsweetsheis!Butyou’llmakeitright,Dolly?Eh?’
Dollycouldscarcelysuppressasmile。ShelovedAnna,butshewaspleasedtoseethatshe,too,hadherweaknesses。
`Anenemy?Thatcan’tbe。’
`Ididsowantyoualltocareforme,asIdoforyou,andnowIcareforyoumorethanever,’saidAnna,withtearsinhereyes。`Ah,howsillyIamtoday!’
Shepassedherhandkerchiefoverherfaceandbegandressing。
AttheverymomentofstartingStepanArkadyevicharrived,late,rosyandgood-humored,smellingofwineandcigars。
Anna’semotionalisminfectedDolly,andwhensheembracedhersister-in-lawforthelasttime,shewhispered:
`Remember,Anna,whatyou’vedoneforme-Ishallneverforget。AndrememberthatIloveyou,andshallalwaysloveyouasmydearestfriend!’
`Idon’tknowwhy,’saidAnna,kissingherandhidinghertears。
`Youunderstandme,andstillunderstand。Good-by,mydarling!’