Theyhademergedonanotherroadwhichranallaroundtheloopingsandyshoresofthelagoonside，crescent-shapedandhollow。Faroutwasmorewhitespraywheretheoceanbrokeindazzlinglaceontheedgesofthelagoonreef，butwithinthecoral’sembracethewaterwasstillandcalm，apolishedsilvermirrortingedwithbronze。
　　"Island’sfourmileswideandeightlong，"herguideexplained。Theydrovepastastragglingwhitebuildingwithadeepverandaandshoplikewindows。"Thegeneralstore，"hesaidwithaproprietaryflourish。"IlivetherewiththeMissus，andshe’snottoohappyaboutalonewomancominghere，Icantellyou。ThinksI’llbeseducedwashowsheputit。Justaswellthebureausaidyouwantedcompletepeaceandquiet，becauseitsoothedtheMissusabitwhenIputyouinthefarthestoutplacewehave。There’snotasoulinyourdirection；theonlyothercouplehereareontheotherside。Youcanlarkaroundwithoutastitchon-noonewillseeyou。TheMissusisn’tgoingtoletmeoutofhersightwhileyou’rehere。Whenyouneedsomething，justpickupyourphoneandI’llbringitout。Nosensewalkingallthewayin。AndMissusorno，I’llcallinonyouonceadayatsunset，justtomakesureyou’reallright。Bestthatyou’reinthehousethen-andwearaproperdress，incasetheMissuscomesalongfortheride。"Aone-storystructurewiththreerooms，thecottagehaditsownprivatecurveofwhitebeachbetweentwoprongsofthehilldivingintothesea，andheretheroadended。Insideitwasveryplain，butcomfortable。Theislandgenerateditsownpower，sotherewasalittlerefrigerator，electriclight，thepromisedphone，andevenawirelessset。Thetoiletflushed，thebathhadfreshwater；moremodernamenitiesthaneitherDroghedaorHimmelhoch，Meggiethoughtinamusement。EasytoseemostofthepatronswerefromSydneyorMelbourne，andsoinuredtocivilizationtheycouldn’tdowithoutit。LeftalonewhileRobspedbacktohissuspiciousMissus，Meggieunpackedandsurveyedherdomain。Thebigdoublebedwasagreatdealmorecomfortablethanherownnuptialcouchhadbeen。Butthen，thiswasagenuinehoneymoonparadiseandtheonethingitsclientswoulddemandwasadecentbed；theclientsoftheDunnypubwereusuallytoodrunktoobjecttoherniatingsprings。Boththerefrigeratorandtheoverheadcupboardswerewellstockedwithfood，andonthecounterstoodagreatbasketofbananas，passionfruit，pineapplesandmangoes。Noreasonwhysheshouldn’tsleepwell，andeatwell。
　　ForthefirstweekMeggieseemedtodonothingbuteatandsleep；shehadn’trealizedhowtiredshewas，northatDungloe’sclimatewaswhathadkilledherappetite。Inthebeautifulbedshesleptthemomentshelaydown，tenandtwelvehoursatastretch，andfoodhadanappealithadn’tpossessedsinceDrogheda。Sheseemedtoeateveryminuteshewasawake，evencarryingmangoesintothewaterwithher。Truthtotell，thatwasthemostlogicalplacetoeatmangoesotherthanabathtub；theyjustranjuice。Sincehertinybeachlaywithinthelagoon，theseawasmirrorcalmandquitefreeofcurrents，veryshallow。Allofwhichsheloved，becauseshecouldn’tswimastroke。Butinwatersosaltyitseemedalmosttoholdherup，shebegantoexperiment；whenshecouldfloatfortensecondsatatimeshewasdelighted。Thesensationofbeingfreedfromthepulloftheearthmadeherlongtobeabletomoveaseasilyasafish。
　　Soifshemournedherlackofcompany，itwasonlybecauseshewouldhavelikedtohavesomeonetoteachhertoswim。Otherthanthat，beingonherownwaswonderful。HowrightAnnehadbeen！Allherlifetherehadbeenpeopleinthehouse。Tohavenoonewassucharelief，soutterlypeaceful。Shewasn’tlonelyatall；shedidn’tmissAnneorLuddieorJustineorLuke，andforthefirsttimeinthreeyearsshedidn’tyearnforDrogheda。OldRobneverdisturbedhersolitude，justchuggedfarenoughdowntheroadeachsunsettomakesureherfriendlywavefromtheverandawasn’tasignalofdistress，turnedthecarandputteredoffagain，hissurprisinglyprettyMissusgrimlyridingshotgun。Oncehephonedhertosayhewastakingtheothercoupleinresidenceoutinhisglass-bottomedboat，andwouldsheliketocomealong？Itwaslikehavingaticketofadmissiontoawholenewplanet，peeringthroughtheglassdownintothatteeming，exquisitelyfragileworld，wheredelicateformswerebuoyedandbolsteredbythelovingintimacyofwater。Livecoral，shediscovered，wasn’tgarishlyhuedfromdyesthewayitwasinthesouvenircounterofthestore。Itwassoftpinkorbeigeorblue-grey，andaroundeveryknobandbranchwaveredamarvelousrainbowofcolor，likeavisibleaura。Greatanemonestwelveincheswideflutteredfringesofblueorredororangeorpurpletentacles；whiteflutedclamsasbigasrocksbeckonedunwaryexplorerstotakealookinsidewithtantalizingglimpsesofcolorful，restlessthingsthroughfeatherylips；redlacefansswayedinwaterwinds；bright-greenribbonsofweeddancedlooseanddrifting。Notoneofthefourintheboatwouldhavebeenintheleastsurprisedtoseeamermaid:agleamofpolishedbreast，atwistingglitteroftail，lazilyspinningcloudsofhair，analluringsmiletauntingthesiren’sspelltosailors。Butthefish！Likelivingjewelstheydartedinthousandsuponthousands，roundlikeChineselanterns，slenderlikebullets，raimentedincolorswhichglowedwithlifeandthelight-splittingqualitywaterimparts，someonfirewithscalesofgoldandscarlet，somecoolandsilveryblue，someswimmingragbagsgaudierthanparrots。Therewereneedle-nosedgarfish，pug-nosedtoadfish，fangedbarracuda，acavernous-mawedgrouperlurkinghalfseeninagrotto，andonceasleekgreynursesharkwhichseemedtotakeforevertopasssilentlybeneaththem。
　　"Butdon’tworry，"saidRob。"We’retoofarsouthhereforseawasps，soifanythingontheReefisgoingtokillyou，it’smostlikelytobeastonefish。Nevergowalkingonthecoralwithoutyourshoes。"
　　Yes，Meggiewasgladshewent。Butshedidn’tyearntogoagain，ormakefriendswiththecoupleRobbroughtalong。Sheimmersedherselfinthesea，andwalked，andlayinthesun。Curiouslyenough，shedidn’tevenmisshavingbookstoread，fortherealwaysseemedtobesomethinginterestingtowatch。ShehadtakenRob’sadviceandstoppedwearingclothes。Atfirstshehadtendedtobehavelikearabbitcatchingwhiffsofdingoonthebreeze，boltingforcoverifatwigcrackedoracoconutfelllikeacannonballfromapalm。Butafterseveraldaysofpatentsolitudeshereallybegantofeelnoonewouldcomenearher，thatindeeditwasasRobsaid，acompletelyprivatedomain。Shynesswaswasted。Andwalkingthetracks，lyinginthesand，paddlinginthatwarmsaltywater，shebegantofeellikeananimalbornandbroughtupinacage，suddenlyletlooseinagentle，sunny，spaciousandwelcomingworld。
　　AwayfromFee，herbrothers，Luke，theunsparing，unthinkingdominationofherwholelife，Meggiediscoveredpureleisure；awholekaleidoscopeofthoughtpatternswoveandunwovenoveldesignsinhermind。Forthefirsttimeinherlifeshewasn’tkeepingherconsciousselfabsorbedinworkthoughtsofonedescriptionoranother。Surprised，sherealizedthatkeepingphysicallybusyisthemosteffectiveblockadeagainsttotallymentalactivityhumanbeingscanerect……
　　YearsagoFatherRalphhadaskedherwhatshethoughtabout，andshehadanswered:DaddyandMum，Bob，Jack，Hughie，Stu，thelittleboys，Frank，Drogheda，thehouse，work，therainfall。Shehadn’tsaidhim，buthewasatthetopofthelist，always。NowaddtothoseJustine，Luke，LuddieandAnne，thecane，homesickness，therainfall。Andalways，ofcourse，thelifesavingreleaseshefoundinbooks。Butithadallcomeandgoneinsuchtangled，unrelatedclumpsandchains；noopportunity，notrainingtoenablehertositdownquietlyandthinkoutwhoexactlywasMeggieCleary，MeggieO’neill？Whatdidshewant？Whatdidshethinkshewasputonthisearthfor？Shemournedthelackoftraining，forthatwasanomissionnoamountoftimeonherowncouldeverrectify。However，herewasthetime，thepeace，thelazinessofidlephysicalwell-being；shecouldlieonthesandandtry。Well，therewasRalph。Awry，despairinglaugh。Notagoodplacetostart，butinasenseRalphwaslikeGod；everythingbeganandendedwithhim。SincethedayhehadkneltinthesunsetdustoftheGillystationyardtotakeherbetweenhishands，therehadbeenRalph，andthoughsheneversawhimagainaslongasshelived，itseemedlikelythatherlastthoughtthissideofthegravewouldbeofhim。Howfrightening，thatonepersoncouldmeansomuch，somanythings。
　　WhathadshesaidtoAnne？Thatherwantsandneedswerequiteordinary-ahusband，children，ahomeofherown。Someonetolove。Itdidn’tseemmuchtoask；afterall，mostwomenhadthelot。Buthowmanyofthewomenwhohadthemweretrulycontent？Meggiethoughtshewouldbe，becauseforhertheyweresohardtocomeby。
　　Acceptit，MeggieCleary。MeggieONEILL。ThesomeoneyouwantisRalphdeBricassart，andyoujustcan’thavehim。Yetasamanheseemstohaveruinedyouforanyoneelse。Allright，then。Assumethatamanandthesomeonetolovecan’toccur。Itwillhavetobechildrentolove，andtheloveyoureceivewillhavetocomefromthosechildren。WhichinturnmeansLuke，andLuke’schildren。
　　Oh，dearGod，dearGod！No，notdearGod！What’sGodeverdoneforme，exceptdeprivemeofRalph？We’renottoofondofeachother，GodandI。AnddoYouknowsomething，God？Youdon’tfrightenmethewayYouusedto。HowmuchIfearedYou，Yourpunishment！AllmylifeI’vetroddenthestraightandnarrow，fromfearofY。Andwhat’sitgotme？NotonescrapmorethanifI’dbrokeneveryruleinYourbook。You’reafraud，God，ademonoffear。Youtreatuslikechildren，danglingpunishment。ButYoudon’tfrightenmeanymore。Becauseitisn’tRalphIoughttobehating，it’sY。It’sallYourfault，notpoorRalph’s。He’sjustlivinginfearofYou，thewayIalwayshave。ThathecouldloveYouissomethingIcan’tunderstand。Idon’tseewhatthereisaboutYoutolove。
　　YethowcanIstoplovingamanwholovesGod？NomatterhowhardItry，Ican’tseemtodoit。He’sthemoon，andI’mcryingforit。Well，you’vejustgottostopcryingforit，MeggieONEILL，that’sallthereistoit。You’regoingtohavetocontentyourselfwithLuke，andLuke’schildren。Byhookorbycrookyou’regoingtoweanLukefromthewretchedsugar，andlivewithhimoutwheretherearen’tevenanytrees。You’regoingtotelltheGillybankmanagerthatyourfutureincomestaysinyourownname，andyou’regoing。touseittohavethecomfortsandconveniencesinyourtreelesshomethatLukewon’tthinktoprovideforyou。You’regoingtouseittoeducateLuke’schildrenproperly，andmakesuretheyneverwant。Andthat’sallthereistobesaidaboutit，MeggieO’neill。I’mMeggieO’neill，notMeggiedeBricassart。Itevensoundssilly，MeggiedeBricassart。I’dhavetobeMeghanndeBricassart，andI’vealwayshatedMeghann。Oh，willIeverstopregrettingthatthey’renotRalph’schildren？That’sthequestion，isn’tit？Sayittoyourself，overandoveragain:Yourlifeisyourown，MeggieO’neill，andyou’renotgoingtowasteitdreamingofamanandchildrenyoucanneverhave。
　　There！That’stellingyourself！Nousethinkingofwhat’spast，whatmustbeburied。Thefuture’sthething，andthefuturebelongstoLuke，toLuke’schildren。Itdoesn’tbelongtoRalphdeBricassart。Heisthepast。Meggierolledoverinthesandandweptasshehadn’tweptsinceshewasthreeyearsold:noisywails，withonlythecrabsandthebirdstohearherdesolation。
　　AnneMuellerhadchosenMatlockIslanddeliberately，planningtosendLukethereassoonasshecould。ThemomentMeggiewasonherwayshesentLukeatelegramsayingMeggieneededhimdesperately，pleasetocome。Bynatureshewasn’tgiventointerferinginotherpeople’slives，butshelovedandpitiedMeggie，andadoredthedifficult，capriciousscrapMeggiehadborneandLukefathered。Justinemusthaveahome，andbothherparents。Itwouldhurttoseehergoaway，butbetterthatthanthepresentsituation。Lukearrivedtwodayslater。HewasonhiswaytotheCSRinSydney，soitdidn’tcosthimmuchtimetogooutofhisway。Timehesawthebaby；ifithadbeenaboyhewouldhavecomewhenitwasborn，butnewsofagirlhaddisappointedhimbadly。IfMeggieinsistedonhavingchildren，letthematleastbecapableofcarryingontheKynunastationoneday。Girlswerenoflaminguseatall；theyjustateamanoutofhouseandhomeandwhentheyweregrownuptheywentandworkedforsomeoneelseinsteadofstayingputlikeboystohelptheiroldfatherinhislastyears。"How’sMeg？"heaskedashecameupontothefrontveranda。"Notsick，Ihope？"
　　"Youhope。No，she’snotsick。I’lltellyouinaminute。Butfirstcomeandseeyourbeautifuldaughter。"
　　Hestareddownatthebaby，amusedandinterestedbutnotemotionallymoved，Annethought。
　　"She’sgotthequeeresteyesI’veeverseen，"hesaid。"Iwonderwhosetheyare？"
　　"Meggiesaysasfarassheknowsnooneinherfamily。"
　　"Normine。She’sathrowback，thefunnylittlething。Doesn’tlooktoohappy，doesshe？"
　　"Howcouldshelookhappy？"Annesnapped，hangingontohertempergrimly。"She’sneverseenherfather，shehasnorealhomeandnotmuchlikelihoodofonebeforeshe’sgrownupifyougoonthewayyouare！""I’msaving，Anne！"heprotested。
　　"Rubbish！Iknowhowmuchmoneyyou’vegot。FriendsofmineinChartersTowerssendmethe-localpaperfromtimetotime，soI’veseentheadsforwesternpropertiesalotcloserinthanKynuna，andalotmorefertile。There’saDepressionon，Luke！Youcouldpickupabeautyofaplaceforalotlessbyfarthantheamountyouhaveinthebank，andyouknowit。""Nowthat’sjustit！There’saDepressionon，andwestoftherangesabloodyterribledroughtfromJuneetotheIsa。It’sinitssecondyearandthere’snorainatall，notadrop。RightnowI’llbetDrogheda’shurting，sowhatdoyouthinkit’slikeoutaroundWintonandBlackall？No，IreckonIoughttowait。"
　　"Waituntilthepriceoflandgoesupinagoodwetseason？Comeoffit，Luke！Now’sthetimetobuy！WithMeggie’sassuredtwothousandayear，youcanwaitoutaten-yeardrought！Justdon’tstocktheplace。LiveonMeggie’stwothousandayearuntiltherainscome，thenputyourstockon。"
　　"I’mnotreadytoleavethesugaryet，"hesaid，stubbornly，stillstaringathisdaughter’sstrangelighteyes。
　　"Andthat’sthetruthatlast，isn’tit？Whydon’tyouadmitit，Luke？Youdon’twanttobemarried，you’dratherlivethewayyouareatthemoment，hard，amongmen，workingyourinnardsout，justlikeoneoutofeverytwoAustralianmenI’veeverknown！Whatisitaboutthisfriggingcountry，thatitsmenpreferbeingwithothermentohavingahomelifewiththeirwivesandchildren？Ifthebachelor’slifeiswhattheytrulywant，whyonearthdotheytrymarriageatall？DoyouknowhowmanydesertedwivesthereareinDunnyalone，scrapinganexistenceandtryingtoreartheirchildrenwithoutfathers？Oh，he’sjustoffinthesugar，he’llbeback，youknow，it’sonlyforalittlewhile。Hah！Andeverymailthey’retherehangingoverthefrontgatewaitingforthepostie，hopingthebastard’ssentthemalittlemoney。Andmostlyhehasn’t，sometimeshehasnotenough，butsomethingtokeepthingsgoing！"
　　Shewastremblingwithrage，hergentlebrowneyessparking。"Youknow，IreadintheBrisbaneMailthatAustraliahasthehighestpercentageofdesertedwivesinthecivilizedworld？It’stheonlythingwebeateveryothercountryat-isn’tthatarecordtobeproudof！""Goeasy，Anne！Ihaven’tdesertedMeg；she’ssafeandshe’snotstarving。What’sthematterwithyou？"
　　"I’msickofthewayyoutreatyourwife，that’swhat！FortheloveofGod，Luke，growup，shoulderyourresponsibilitiesforawhile！You’vegotawifeandbaby！Youshouldbemakingahomeforthem-beahusbandandafather，notabloodystranger！"
　　"Iwill，Iwill！ButIcan’tyet；I’vegottocarryoninthesugarforacouplemoreyearsjusttomakesure。Idon’twanttosayI’mlivingoffMeg，whichiswhatI’dbedoinguntilthingsgotbetter。"
　　Anneliftedherlipcontemptuously。"Oh，bullshit！Youmarriedherforhermoney，didn’tyou？"
　　Adark-redflushstainedhisbrownface。Hewouldn’tlookather。"Iadmitthemoneyhelped，butImarriedherbecauseIlikedherbetterthananyoneelse。"
　　"Youlikedher！Whataboutlovingher？"
　　"Love！What’slove？Nothingbutafigmentofwomen’simagination，that’sall。"Heturnedawayfromthecribandthoseunsettlingeyes，notsuresomeonewitheyeslikethatcouldn’tunderstandwhatwasbeingsaid。"Andifyou’vequitefinishedtellingmeoff，where’sMeg？""Shewasn’twell。Isentherawayforawhile。Oh，don’tpanic！Notonyourmoney。IwashopingIcouldpersuadeyoutojoinher，butIseethat’simpossible。"
　　"Outofthequestion。ArneandIareonourwaytoSydneytonight。""WhatshallItellMeggiewhenshecomesback？"Heshrugged，dyingtogetaway。"Idon’tcare。Oh，tellhertohangonawhilelonger。Nowthatshe’sgoneaheadwiththefamilybusiness，Iwouldn’tmindason。"
　　Leaningagainstthewallforsupport，Annebentoverthewickerbasketandliftedthebabyup，thenmanagedtoshuffletothebedandsitdown。Lukemadenomovetohelpher，ortakethebaby；helookedratherfrightenedofhisdaughter。
　　"Goaway，Luke！-Youdon’tdeservewhatyou’vegot。I’msickofthesightofyou。GobacktobloodyArne，andtheflamingsugar，andthebackbreak！"Atthedoorhepaused。"Whatdidshecallit？I’veforgottenitsname。""Justine，Justine，Justine！"
　　"Bloodystupidname，"hesaid，andwentout。
　　AnneputJustineonthebedandburstintotears。GoddamnallmenbutLuddie，Goddamnthem！Wasitthesoft，sentimental，almostwomanishstreakinLuddiemadehimcapableofloving？WasLukeright？Wasitjustafigmentofwomen’simaginations？Orwasitsomethingonlywomenwereabletofeel，ormenwithalittlewomaninthem？NowomancouldeverholdLuke，nowomaneverhad。Whathewantednowomancouldevergivehim。Butbythenextdayshehadcalmeddown，nolongerfeelingshehadtriedfornothing。ApostcardfromMeggiehadcomethatmorning，waxingenthusiasticaboutMatlockIslandandhowwellshewas。Somethinggoodhadcomeoutofit。Meggiewasfeelingbetter。Shewouldcomebackasthemonsoonsdiminishedandbeabletofaceherlife。ButAnneresolvednottotellheraboutLuke。
　　SoNancy，shortforAnnunziata，carriedJustineoutontothefrontveranda，whileAnnehobbledoutwiththebaby’swantsinalittlebasketbetweenherteeth；cleandiaper，tinofpowderandtoys。Shesettledinacanechair，tookthebabyfromNancyandbegantofeedherfromthebottleofLactogenNancyhadwarmed。Itwasverypleasant，lifewasverypleasant；shehaddoneherbesttomakeLukeseesense，andifshehadfailed，atleastitmeantMeggieandJustinewouldremainatHimmelhochawhilelonger。ShehadnodoubtthateventuallyMeggiewouldrealizetherewasnohopeofsalvagingherrelationshipwithLuke，andwouldthenreturntoDrogheda。ButAnnedreadedtheday。
　　AredEnglishsportscarroaredofftheDunnyroadandupthelong，hillydrive；itwasnewandexpensive，itsbonnetstrappeddownwithleather，itssilverexhaustsandscarletpaintworkglittering。Forawhileshedidn’trecognizethemanwhovaultedoverthelowdoor，forheworetheNorthQueenslanduniformofapairofshortsandnothingelse。Myword，whatabeautifulbloke！shethought，watchinghimappreciativelyandwithatwingeofmemoryashetookthestepstwoatatime。IwishLuddiewouldn’teatsomuch；hecoulddowithabitofthischap’scondition。Now，he’snochicken-lookatthosemarveloussilvertemplesbutI’veneverseenacanecutterinbetternick。
　　Whenthecalm，aloofeyeslookedintohers，sherealizedwhohewas。
　　"MyGod！"shesaid，anddroppedthebaby’sbottle。Heretrievedit，handedittoherandleanedagainsttheverandarailing，facingher:"It’sallright。Theteatdidn’tstriketheground；youcanfeedherwithit。"Thebabywasjustbeginningadeprivedquiver。Annestucktherubberinhermouthandgotenoughbreathbacktospeak。"Well，YourGrace，thisisasurprise！"Hereyesslidoverhim，amused。"Imustsayyoudon’texactlylooklikeanarchbishop。Notthatyoueverdid，eveninthepropertogs。Ialwaysimaginearchbishopsofanyreligiousdenominationtobefatandself-satisfied。"
　　"AtthemomentI’mnotanarchbishop，onlyapriestonawell-earnedholiday，soyoucancallmeRalph。IsthisthelittlethingcausedMeggiesomuchtroublewhenIwasherelast？MayIhaveher？IthinkIcanmanagetoholdthebottleattheappropriateangle。"
　　HesettledintoachairalongsideAnne，tookbabyandbottleandcontinuedtofeedher，hislegscrossedcasually。
　　"DidMeggienameherJustine？"
　　"Yes。"
　　"Ilikeit。GoodLord，lookatthecolorofherhair！Hergrandfatherallover。"
　　"That’swhatMeggiesays。Ihopethepoorlittlemitedoesn’tcomeoutinamillionfreckleslateron，butIthinkshewill。"
　　"Well，Meggie’ssortofaredheadandsheisn’tabitfreckled。ThoughMeggie’sskinisadifferentcolorandtexture，moreopaque。"Heputtheemptybottledown，satthebabyboltuprightonhisknee，facinghim，bentherforwardinasalaamandbeganrhythmicallyrubbingherbackhard。"AmongmyotherdutiesIhavetovisitCatholicorphanages，soI’mquitedeedywithbabies。MotherGonzagaatmyfavoriteinfants’homealwayssaysthisistheonlywaytoburpababy。Holdingitoverone’sshoulderdoesn’tflexthebodyforwardenough，thewindcan’tescapesoeasily，andwhenitdoescomeupthere’susuallylotsofmilkaswell。Thiswaythebaby’sbentinthemiddle，whichcorksthemilkinwhileitletsthegasescape。"Asiftoprovehispoint，Justinegaveseveralhugeeructationsbutheldhergorge。Helaughed，rubbedagain，andwhennothingfurtherhappenedsettledherinthecrookofhisarmcomfortably。"Whatfabulouslyexoticeyes！Magnificent，aren’tthey？TrustMeggietohaveanunusualbaby。"
　　"Nottochangethesubject，butwhatafatheryou’dhavemade，Father。""Ilikebabiesandchildren，Ialwayshave。It’smucheasierformetoenjoythem，sinceIdon’thaveanyoftheunpleasantdutiesfathersdo。""No，it’sbecauseyou’relikeLuddie。You’vegotabitofwomaninyou。"ApparentlyJustine，normallysoisolationist，returnedhisliking；shehadgonetosleep。RalphsettledhermoresnuglyandpulledapacketofCapstansfromhisshortspocket。
　　"Here，givethemtome。I’lllightoneforyou。"
　　"Where’sMeggie？"heasked，takingalitcigarettefromher。"Thankyou。I’msorry，pleasetakeoneforyourself。"
　　"She’snothere。SheneverreallygotoverthebadtimeshehadwhenJustinewasborn，andTheWetseemedtobethelaststraw。SoLuddieandIsentherawayfortwomonths。She’llbebackaroundthefirstofMarch；anothersevenweekstogo。"
　　ThemomentAnnespokeshewasawareofthechangeinhim；asifthewholeofhispurposehadsuddenlyevaporated，andthepromiseofsomeveryspecialpleasure。
　　Hedrewalongbreath。"ThisisthesecondtimeI’vecometosaygoodbyeandnotfoundher……Athens，andnowagain。Iwasawayforayearthenanditmighthavebeenalotlonger；Ididn’tknowatthetime。IhadnevervisitedDroghedasincePaddyandStudied，yetwhenitcameIfoundIcouldn’tleaveAustraliawithoutseeingMeggie。Andshe’dmarried，goneaway。Iwantedtocomeafterher，butIknewitwouldn’thavebeenfairtoherortoLuke。ThistimeIcamebecauseIknewIcouldn’tharmwhatisn’tthere。"
　　"Whereareyougoing？"
　　"ToRome，totheVatican。CardinaldiContiniVerchesehastakenoverthedutiesofCardinalMonteverdi，whodiednotlongago。Andhe’saskedforme，asIknewhewould。It’sagreatcompliment，butmorethanthat。Icannotrefusetogo。"
　　"Howlongwillyoubeaway？"
　　"Oh，averylongtime，Ithink。TherearewarrumblesinEurope，thoughitseemssofarawayuphere。TheChurchinRomeneedseverydiplomatshehas，andthankstoCardinaldiContini-VercheseI’mclassifiedasadiplomat。MussoliniiscloselyalliedtoHitler，birdsofafeather，andsomehowtheVaticanhastoreconciletwoopposingideologies，CatholicismandFascism。Itwon’tbeeasy。IspeakGermanverywell，learnedGreekwhenIwasinAthensandItalianwhenIwasinRome。IalsospeakFrenchandSpanishfluently。"Hesighed。"I’vealwayshadatalentforlanguages，andIcultivateditdeliberately。ItwasinevitablethatIwouldbetransferred。"
　　"Well，YourGrace，unlessyou’resailingtomorrowyoucanstillseeMeggie。"
　　ThewordspoppedoutbeforeAnneletherselfstoptothink；whyshouldn’tMeggieseehimoncebeforehewentaway，especiallyif，asheseemedtothink，hewasgoingtobeawayaverylongtime？Hisheadturnedtowardher。Thosebeautiful，distantblueeyeswereveryintelligentandveryhardtofool。Oh，yes，hewasaborndiplomat！Heknewexactlywhatshewassaying，andeveryreasonatthebackofhermind。Annefoundherselfhangingbreathlesslyonhisanswer，butforalongtimehesaidnothing，justsatstaringoutovertheemeraldcanetowardthebrimmingriver，withthebabyforgotteninthecrookofhisarm。Fascinated，shestaredathisprofile-thecurveofeyelid，thestraightnose，thesecretivemouth，thedeterminedchin。Whatforceswashemarshalingwhilehecontemplatedtheview？Whatcomplicatedbalancesoflove，desire，duty，expediency，willpower，longing，didheweighinhismind，andwhichagainstwhich？Hishandliftedthecigarettetohislips；Annesawthefingerstrembleandsoundlesslyletgoherbreath。Hewasnotindifferent，then。Forperhapstenminuteshesaidnothing；AnnelithimanotherCapstan，handedittohiminplaceoftheburned-outstub。It，too，hesmokeddownsteadily，notonceliftinghisgazefromthefarmountainsandthemonsooncloudsloweringthesky。
　　"Whereisshe？"heaskedtheninaperfectlynormalvoice，throwingthesecondstubovertheverandarailingafterthefirst。Andonwhatsheanswereddependedhisdecision；itwasherturntothink。Wasonerighttopushotherhumanbeingsonacoursewhichledoneknewnotwhere，ortowhat？HerloyaltywasalltoMeggie；shedidn’thonestlycareaniotawhathappenedtothisman。InhiswayhewasnobetterthanLuke。Offaftersomemalethingwithneverthetimeortheinclinationtoputawomanaheadofit，runningandclutchingatsomedreamwhichprobablyonlyexistedinhasaddledhead。Nomoresubstancethanthesmokefromthemilldissipatingitselfintheheavy，molasses-ladenair。Butitwaswhathewanted，andhewouldspendhimselfandhislifeinchasingit。Hehadn’tlosthisgoodsense，nomatterwhatMeggiemeanttohim。Notevenforher-andAnnewasbeginningtobelievehelovedMeggiemorethananythingexceptthatstrangeideal-wouldhejeopardizethechanceofgraspingwhathewantedinhishandsoneday。No，notevenforher。SoifsheansweredthatMeggiewasinsomecrowdedresorthotelwherehemightberecognized，hewouldn’tgo。Nooneknewbetterthanhethathewasn’tthesortwhocouldbecomeanonymousinacrowd。Shelickedherlips，foundhervoice。"Meggie’sinacottageonMatlockIsland。"
　　"Onwhere？"
　　"MatlockIsland。It’saresortjustoffWhitsundayPassage，andit’sspeciallydesignedforprivacy。Besides，atthistimeoftheyearthere’shardlyasoulonit。"Shecouldn’tresistadding，"Don’tworry，noonewillseeyou！"
　　"Howreassuring。"Verygentlyheeasedthesleepingbabyoutofhisarms，handedhertoAnne。"Thankyou，"hesaid，goingtothesteps。Thenheturnedback，inhiseyesaratherpatheticappeal。"You’requitewrong，"hesaid。"Ijustwanttoseeher，nomorethanthat。IshallneverinvolveMeggieinanythingwhichmightendangerherimmortalsoul。"
　　"Oryourown，eh？Thenyou’dbettergoasLukeO’neill；he’sexpected。Thatwayyou’llbesuretocreatenoscandal，forMeggieorforyourself。""AndwhatifLuketurnsup？"
　　"There’snochanceofthat。He’sgonetoSydneyandhewon’tbebackuntilMarch。TheonlywayhecouldhaveknownMeggiewasonMatlockisthroughme，andIdidn’ttellhim，YourGrace。"
　　"DoesMeggieexpectLuke？"
　　Annesmiledwryly。"Oh，dearme，no。"
　　"Ishan’tharmher，"heinsisted。"Ijustwanttoseeherforalittlewhile，that’sall。"
　　"I’mwellawareofit，YourGrace。Butthefactremainsthatyou’dharmheragreatdeallessifyouwantedmore，"saidAnne。
　　WhenoldRob’scarcamesputteringalongtheroadMeggiewasatherstationonthecottageveranda，handraisedinthesignalthateverythingwasfineandsheneedednothing。Hestoppedintheusualspottoreverse，butbeforehedidsoamaninshorts，shirtandsandalssprangoutofthecar，suitcaseinhand。
　　"Hooroo，Mr。O’neill！"Robyelledashewent。ButneveragainwouldMeggiemistakethem，LukeO’neillandRalphdeBricassart。Thatwasn’tLuke；evenatthedistanceandinthefast-fadinglightshewasn’tdeceived。Shestooddumblyandwaitedwhilehewalkeddowntheroadtowardher，RalphdeBricassart。Hehaddecidedhewantedherafterall。Therecouldbenootherreasonforhisjoiningherinaplacelikethis，callinghimselfLukeO’neill。Nothinginherseemedtobefunctioning，notlegsormindorheart。ThiswasRalphcometoclaimher，whycouldn’tshefeel？Whywasn’tsherunningdowntheroadtohisarms，soutterlygladtoseehimnothingelsemattered？ThiswasRalph，andhewasallshehadeverwantedoutofliving；hadn’tshejustspentmorethanaweektryingtogetthatfactoutofhermind？Goddamnhim，Goddamnhim！Whythehelldidhehavetocomewhenshewasfinallybeginningtogethimoutofherthoughts，ifnotoutofherheart？Oh，itwasallgoingtostartagain！Stunned，sweating，angry，shestoodwoodenlywaiting，watchingthatgracefulformgrowlarger。"Hello，Ralph，"shesaidthroughclenchedteeth，notlookingathim。"Hello，Meggie。"
　　"Bringyourcaseinside。Wouldyoulikeahotcupoftea？"Asshespokesheledthewayintothelivingroom，stillnotlookingathim。"Thatwouldbenice，"hesaid，asstiltedasshe。Hefollowedherintothekitchenandwatchedwhileshepluggedinanelectricjug，filledtheteapotfromalittlehot-watergeyseroverthesink，andbusiedherselfgettingcupsandsaucersdownfromacupboard。Whenshehandedhimthebigfive-poundtinofArnottsbiscuitshetookacoupleofhandfulsofcookiesoutofitandputthemonaplate。Thejugboiled，sheemptiedthehotwateroutoftheteapot，spoonedlooseteaintoitandfilleditwithbubblingwater。Whileshecarriedthecookieplateandtheteapot，hefollowedwiththecupsandsaucers，backintothelivingroom。Thethreeroomshadbeenbuiltalongsideeachother，thebedroomopeningoffonesideofthelivingroomandthekitchenofftheother，withthebathroombeyondit。Thismeantthehousehadtwoverandas，onefacingtheroadandtheotherthebeach。Whichinturnmeanttheyeachhadsomewhereexcusabletolookwithouthavingtolookateachother。Fulldarknesshadfallenwithtropicalsuddenness，buttheairthroughthewide-openslidingdoorswasfilledwiththelappingofwater，thedistantsurfonthereef，thecomingandgoingofthewarmsoftwind。Theydranktheteainsilence，thoughneithercouldeatabiscuit，andthesilencestretchedonaftertheteawasfinished，heshiftinghisgazetoherandshekeepingherssteadfastlyonthebreezyantics-ofababypalmoutsidetheroad-verandadoors。
　　"What’sthematter，Meggie？"heasked，sogentlyandtenderlyherheartknockedfrantically，andseemedtodiefromthepainofit，theoldqueryofthegrownmantothelittlegirl。Hehadn’tcometoMatlocktoseethewomanatall。Hehadcometoseethechild。Itwasthechildheloved，notthewoman。Thewomanhehadhatedfromthemomentshecameintobeing。Roundandupcamehereyestohis，amazed，outraged，furious；evennow，evennow！Timesuspended，shestaredathimso，andhewasforcedtosee，breathcaughtastounded，thegrownwomaninthoseglass-cleareyes。Meggie’seyes。Oh，God，Meggie’seyes！
　　HehadmeantwhathesaidtoAnneMueller；hejustwantedtoseeher，nothingmore。Thoughhelovedher，hehadn’tcometobeherlover。Onlytoseeher，talktoher，beherfriend，sleeponthelivingroomcouchwhilehetriedoncemoretounearththetaprootofthateternalfascinationshepossessedforhim，thinkingthatifonlyhecouldseeitfullyexposed，hemightgainthespiritualmeanstoeradicateit。IthadbeenhardtoadjusttoaMeggiewithbreasts，awaist，hips；buthehaddoneitbecausewhenhelookedintohereyes，therelikethepooloflightinasanctuarylampshonehisMeggie。Amindandaspiritwhosepullshehadneverbeenfreefromsincefirstmeetingher，stillunchangedinsidethatdistressinglychangedbody；butwhilehecouldseeproofoftheircontinuedexistenceinhereyes，hecouldacceptthealteredbody，disciplinehisattractiontoit。
　　And，visitinghisownwishesanddreamsuponher，hehadneverdoubtedshewantedtodothesameuntilshehadturnedonhimlikeagoadedcat，atJustine’sbirth。Eventhen，aftertheangerandhurtdiedinhim，hehadattributedherbehaviortothepainshehadgonethrough，spiritualmorethanphysical。Now，seeingheratlastasshewas，hecouldpinpointtoasecondthemomentwhenshehadshedthelensesofchildhood，donnedthelensesofawoman:thatinterludeintheDroghedacemeteryafterMaryCarson’sbirthdayparty。Whenhehadexplainedtoherwhyhecouldn’tshowheranyspecialattention，becausepeoplemightdeemhiminterestedinherasaman。Shehadlookedathimwithsomethinginhereyeshehadnotunderstood，thenlookedaway，andwhensheturnedbacktheexpressionwasgone。Fromthattime，hesawnow，shehadthoughtofhiminadifferentlight；shehadn’tkissedhiminapassingweaknesswhenshehadkissedhim，thengonebacktothinkingofhimintheoldway，ashehadher。Hehadperpetuatedhisillusions，nurturedthem，tuckedthemintohisunchangingwayoflifeasbesthecould，wornthemlikeahairshirt。Whileallthetimeshehadfurnishedherloveforhimwithwoman’sobjects。
　　Admitit，hehadphysicallywantedherfromthetimeoftheirfirstkiss，butthewanthadneverplaguedhimthewayhisloveforherhad；seeingthemasseparateanddistinct，notfacetsofthesamething。She，poormisunderstoodcreature，hadneversuccumbedtothisparticularfolly。Atthatmoment，hadtherebeenanywayhecouldhavegotoffMatlockIsland，hewouldhavefledfromherlikeOrestesfromtheEumenides。Buthecouldn’tquittheisland，andhedidhavethecouragetoremaininherpresenceratherthansenselesslywalkthenight。WhatcanIdo，howcanIpossiblymakereparation？Idoloveher！AndifIloveher，ithastobebecauseofthewaysheisnow，notbecauseofajuvenilewaystationalongherroad。It’swomanlythingsI’vealwayslovedinher；thebearingoftheburden。So，RalphdeBricassart，takeoffyourblinkers，seeherasshereallyis，notasshewaslongago。Sixteenyearsago，sixteenlongincredibleyears……Iamforty-fourandsheistwenty-six；neitherofusisachild，butIambyfarthemoreimmature。YoutookitforgrantedtheminuteIsteppedoutofRob’scar，isn’tthatso，Meggie？YouassumedIhadgiveninatlast。AndbeforeyouevenhadtimetogetyourbreathbackIhadtoshowyouhowwrongyouwere。Irippedthefabricofyourdelusionapartasifithadbeenadirtyoldrag。Oh，Meggie！WhathaveIdonetoyou？HowcouldIhavebeensoblind，soutterlyself-centered？I’veaccomplishednothingincomingtoseeyou，unlessitistocutyouintolittlepieces。Alltheseyearswe’vebeenlovingatcross-purposes。
　　Stillshewaslookingintohiseyes，herownfillingwithshame，humiliation，butastheexpressionsflewacrosshisfacetothefinaloneofdespairingpitysheseemedtorealizethemagnitudeofhermistake，thehorrorofit。Andmorethanthat:thefactthatheknewhermistake。Go，run！Run，Meggie，getoutofherewiththescrapofpridehe’sleftyou！Theinstantshethoughtitsheactedonit，shewasupoutofherchairandfleeing。
　　Beforeshecouldreachtheverandahecaughther，theimpetusofherflightspinningherroundagainsthimsohardhestaggered。Itdidn’tmatter，anyofit，thegruelingbattletoretainhissoul’sintegrity，thelongpressingdownofwillupondesire；inmomentshehadgonelifetimes。Allthatpowerhelddormant，sleeping，onlyneedingthedetonationofatouchtotriggerachaosinwhichmindwassubservienttopassion，mind’swillextinguishedinbody’swill。
　　Upslidherarmsaroundhisneck，hisacrossherback，spasmed；hebenthishead，gropedwithhismouthforhers，foundit。Hermouth，nolongeranunwanted，unwelcomememorybutreal；herarmsabouthimasifshecouldn’tbeartolethimgo；thewaysheseemedtoloseeventhefeelotherbones；howdarkshewaslikethenight，tangledmemoryanddesire，unwantedmemoryandunwelcomedesire。Theyearshemusthavelongedforthis，longedforheranddeniedherpower，kepthimselfevenfromthethoughtofherasawoman！
　　Didhecarryhertothebed，ordidtheywalk？Hethoughthemusthavecarriedher，buthecouldnotbesure；onlythatshewasthereuponit，hewasthereuponit，herskinunderhishands，hisskinunderhers。Oh，God！My
　　Meggie，myMeggie！Howcouldtheyrearmefrominfancytothinkyouprofanation？
　　Timeceasedtotickandbegantoflow，washedoverhimuntilithadnomeaning，onlyadepthofdimensionmorerealthanrealtime。Hecouldfeelheryethedidnotfeelher，notasaseparateentity；wantingtomakeherfinallyandforeverapartofhimself，agraftwhichwashimself，notasymbiosiswhichacknowledgedherasdistinct。Neveragainwouldhenotknowtheupthrustsofbreastsandbellyandbuttocks；thefoldsandcrevicesinbetween。Trulyshewasmadeforhim，forhehadmadeher；forsixteenyearshehadshapedandmoldedherwithoutknowingthathedid，letalonewhyhedid。Andheforgotthathehadevergivenheraway，thatanothermanhadshownhertheendofwhathehadbegunforhimself，hadalwaysintendedforhimself，forshewashisdownfall，hisrose；hiscreation。Itwasadreamfromwhichhewouldneveragainawaken，notaslongashewasaman，withaman’sbody。Oh，dearGod！1know，1know！IknowwhyIkeptherasanideaandachildwithinmeforsolongaftershehadgrownbeyondboth，butwhydoesithavetobelearnedlikethis？
　　Becauseatlastheunderstoodthatwhathehadaimedtobewasnotaman。Notaman，neveraman；somethingfargreater，somethingbeyondthefateofamereman。Yetafterallhisfatewashereunderhishands，struckquiveringandalightwithhim，herman。Aman，foreveraman。DearLord，couldstThounothavekeptthisfromme？Iamaman，IcanneverbeGod；itwasadelusion，thatlifeinsearchofgodhead。Areweallthesame，wepriests，yearningtobeGod？Weabjuretheoneactwhichirrefutablyprovesusmen。Hewrappedhisarmsaboutherandlookeddownwitheyesfulloftearsatthestill，faintlylitface，watcheditsrosebudmouthdropopen，gasp，becomeahelplessOofastonishedpleasure。Herarmsandlegswereroundhim，livingropeswhichboundhimtoher，silkily，sleeklytormentedhim；heputhischinintohershoulderandhischeekagainstthesoftnessofhers，gavehimselfovertothemaddening，exasperatingdriveofamangrapplingwithfate。Hismindreeled，slipped，becameutterlydarkandblindinglybright；foronemomenthewaswithinthesun，thenthebrilliancefaded，grewgrey，andwentout。Thiswasbeingaman。Hecouldbenomore。Butthatwasnotthesourceofthepain。Thepainwasinthefinalmoment，thefinitemoment，theempty，desolaterealization:ecstasyisfleeting。Hecouldn’tbeartolethergo，notnowthathehadher；hehadmadeherforhimself。Soheclungtoherlikeadrowningmantoasparinalonelysea，andsoon，buoyant，risingagainonatidegrownquicklyfamiliar，hesuccumbedtotheinscrutablefatewhichisaman’s。
　　Whatwassleep？Meggiewondered。Ablessing，arespitefromlife，anechoofdeath，ademandingnuisance？Whateveritwas，hehadyieldedhimselftoit，andlaywithhisarmoverherandhisheadbesidehershoulder，possessiveeveninit。Shewastired，too，butshewouldnotletherselfsleep。Somehowshefeltifsherelaxedhergrasponconsciousnesshemightnotbetherewhenshepickeditupagain。Latershecouldsleep，afterhewasawakeandthesecretive，beautifulmouthuttereditsfirstwords。Whatwouldhesaytoher？Wouldheregretit？Hadshebeenapleasuretohimworthwhathehadabandoned？Somanyyearshehadfoughtit，madeherfightitwithhim；shecouldhardlymakeherselfbelievehehadlaindownhisarmsatlast，buttherehadbeenthingshehadsaidinthenightandinthemidstofhispainwhichblottedouthislongdenialofher。
　　Shewassupremelyhappy，happierthanshecouldremembereverbeing。Fromthemomenthehadpulledherbackfromthedoorithadbeenabodypoem，athingofarmsandhandsandskinandutterpleasure。Iwasmadeforhim，andonlyforhim……That’swhyIfeltsolittlewithLuke！Borneoutbeyondthelimitsofenduranceonherbody’stide，allshecouldthinkwasthattogivehimeverythingshecouldwasmorenecessarytoherthanlifeitself。Hemustneverregretit，never。Oh，hispain！Therehadbeenmomentswhensheseemedactuallytofeelitasifithadbeenherown。Whichonlycontributedtoherhappiness；therewassomejusticeinhispain。
　　Hewasawake。Shelookeddownintohiseyesandsawthesameloveintheirbluenesswhichhadwarmedher，givenherpurposesincechildhood；andwithitagreat，shadowedfatigue。Notawearinessofthebody，butawearinessofthesoul。
　　Hewasthinkingthatinallhislifehehadneverwokeninthesamebedasanotherperson；itwasinawaymoreintimatethanthesexualactprecedingit，adeliberateindicationofemotionalties，acleavingtoher。Lightandemptyastheairsoalluringlyfullofmarinetangandsun-soakedvegetation，hedriftedforawhileonthewingsofadifferentkindoffreedom:thereliefofrelinquishinghismandatetofighther，thepeaceoflosingalong，incrediblybloodywarandfindingthesurrenderfarsweeterthanthebattles。Ah，butIgaveyouagoodfight，myMeggie！Yetintheenditisn’tyourfragmentsImustgluetogether，butthedismemberedchunksofmyself。Youwereputinmylifetoshowmehowfalse，howpresumptuousistheprideofapriestofmykind；likeLuciferIaspiredtothatwhichisGod’salone，andlikeLucifer，Ifell。Ihadthecha/y，theobedience，eventhepovertybeforeMaryCarson。Butuntilthismorning
　　Ihaveneverknownhumility。DearLord，ifshemeantnothingtomeitwouldbeeasiertobear，butsometimesIthinkIloveherfarmorethanIdoThee，andthat，too，isapartofThypunishment。HerIdonotdoubt；Thou？Atrick，aphantom，ajest。HowcanIloveajest？Andyet，Ido。"IfIcouldgettheenergytogether，I’dgoforaswimandthenmakebreakfast，"hesaid，desperateforsomethingtosay，andfelthersmileagainsthischest。
　　"Gofortheswimpart，I’llmakethebreakfast。Andthere’snoneedtoputanythingonhere。Noonecomes。"
　　"Trulyparadise！"Heswunghislegsoffthebed，satupandstretched。"It’sabeautifulmorning。Iwonderifthat’sanomen。"
　　Alreadythepainofparting；justbecausehehadleftthebed；shelaywatchinghimashewalkedtotheslidingdoorsgivingontothebeach，steppedoutsideandpaused。Heturned，heldouthishand。"Comewithme？Wecangetbreakfasttogether。"
　　Thetidewasin，thereefcovered，theearlysunhotbuttherestlesssummerwindcool；coarsegrasssentfeelersdownontothecrumbling，unsandlikesand，wherecrabsandinsectsscuttledafterpickings。"IfeelasifI’veneverseentheworldbefore，"hesaid，staring。Meggieclutchedathishand；shefeltvisited，andfoundthissunnyaftermathmoreincomprehensiblethanthenight’sdreamyreality。Hereyesrestedonhim，aching。Itwastimeoutofmind，adifferentworld。Soshesaid，"Notthisworld。Howcouldyou？Thisisourworld，foraslongasitlasts。"
　　"What’sLukelike？"heasked，overbreakfast。Sheputherheadononeside，considering。"NotasmuchlikeyouphysicallyasIusedtothink，becauseinthosedaysImissedyoumore，Ihadn’tgotusedtodoingwithoutyou。IbelieveImarriedhimbecauseheremindedmeofyou。Atanyrate，Ihadmadeupmymindtomarrysomeone，andhestoodheadandshouldersabovetherest。Idon’tmeaninworthiness，orniceness，oranyofthethingswomenaresupposedtofinddesirableinahusband。JustinsomewayIcan’tputafingeron。Exceptperhapsthatheislikeyou。Hedoesn’tneedwomen，either。"
　　Hisfacetwisted。"Isthathowyouseeme，Meggie？""Truthfully？Ithinkso。I’llneverunderstandwhy，butIthinkso。There’ssomethinginLukeandinyouwhichbelievesthatneedingawomanisaweakness。Idon’tmeantosleepwith；Imeantoneed，reallyneed。""Andacceptingthat，youcanstillwantus？"
　　Sheshrugged，smiledwithatraceofpity。"Oh，Ralph！Idon’tsayitisn’timportant，andit’scertainlycausedmealotofunhappiness，butitisthewaythingsare。I’dbeafooltowastemyselftryingtoeradicateit，whenitcan’tbeeradicated。ThebestIcandoisexploittheweakness，notignoreitsexistence。BecauseIwantandneed，too。AndapparentlyIwantandneedpeoplelikeyouandLuke，orIwouldn’thavespentmyselfoverthepairofyouthewayIhave。I’dhavemarriedagood，kind，simplemanlikemyfather，someonewhodidwantandneedme。Butthere’sastreakofSamsonineveryman，Ithink。It’sjustthatinmenlikeyouandLuke，it’smorepronounced。"Hedidn’tseematallinsulted；hewassmiling。"MywiseMeggie！""That’snotwisdom，Ralph。Justcommonsense。I’mnotaverywisepersonatall，youknowthat。Butlookatmybrothers。Idoubttheolderonesatanyratewillevergetmarried，or。havegirlfriendseven。They’reterriblyshy，they’refrightenedofthepowerawomanmighthaveoverthem，andthey’requitewrappedupinMum。"
　　Dayfollowedday，andnightfollowednight。Eventheheavysummerrainswerebeautiful，tobewalkedinnakedandlistenedtoontheironroof，aswarmandfullofcaressesasthesun。Andwhenthesunwasouttheywalkedtoo，lazedonthebeach，swam；forhewasteachinghertoswim。
　　Sometimeswhenhedidn’tknowhewasbeingwatchedMeggiewouldlookathimandtrydesperatelytoimprinthisfaceuponherbrain’score，rememberinghowinspiteoftheloveshehadborneFrank，withthepassingoftheyearshisimagehaddimmed，thelookofhim。Thereweretheeyes，thenose，themouth，thestunningsilverwingsinthatblackhair，thelonghardbodywhichhadkepttheslendernessandtautnessofyouth，yethadsetalittle，lostelasticity。Andhewouldturntofindherwatchinghim，alookinhiseyesofhauntedgrief，adoomedlook。Sheunderstoodtheimplicitmessage，orthoughtshedid；hemustgo，backtotheChurchandhisduties。Neveragainwiththesamespirit，perhaps，butmoreabletoserve。Foronlythosewhohaveslippedandfallenknowthevicissitudesoftheway。
　　Oneday，whenthesunhadgonedownfarenoughtobloodytheseaandstainthecoralsandahazyyellow，heturnedtoherastheylayonthebeach。"Meggie，I’veneverbeensohappy，orsounhappy。"
　　"Iknow，Ralph。"
　　"Ibelieveyoudo。IsitwhyIloveyou？You’renotmuchoutoftheordinaryway，Meggie，andyetyouaren’tordinaryatall。DidIsenseit，allthoseyearsago？Imusthave，Isuppose。Mypassionfortitianhair！LittledidIknowwhereitwouldleadme。Iloveyou，Meggie。"
　　"Areyouleaving？"
　　"Tomorrow。Imust。MyshipsailsforGenoainlessthanaweek。""Genoa？"
　　"Rome，actually。Foralongtime，perhapstherestofmylife。Idon’tknow。"
　　"Don’tworry，Ralph，I’llletyougowithoutanyfuss。Mytimeisalmostup，too。I’mleavingLuke，I’mgoinghometoDrogheda。"
　　"Oh，mydear！Notbecauseofthis，becauseofme？""No，ofcoursenot，"shelied。"I’dmadeupmymindbeforeyouarrived。Lukedoesn’twantmeorneedme，hewon’tmissmeintheslightest。ButIneedahome，somewhereofmyown，andIthinknowthatDroghedaisalwaysgoingtobethatplace。Itisn’trightthatpoorJustineshouldgrowupinahousewhereI’mtheservant，thoughIknowAnneandLuddiedon’tthinkofmelikeaservant。Butit’showIthinkofmyself，andhowJustinewillthinkofmewhenshe’soldenoughtounderstandshehasn’tanormalsortofhome。Inawaysheneverwillenjoythat，butImustdoasmuchforherasIcan。SoI’mgoingbacktoDrogheda。"
　　"I’llwritetoyou，Meggie。"
　　"No，don’t。DoyouthinkIneedletters，afterthis？Idon’twantanythingbetweenuswhichmightendangeryou，fallintothehandsofunscrupulouspeople。Sonoletters。Ifyou’reeverinAustraliaitwouldbenaturalandnormalofyoutovisitDrogheda，thoughI’mwarningyou，Ralph，tothinkbeforeyoudo。ThereareonlytwoplacesintheworldwhereyoubelongtomeaheadofGod-hereonMatlock，andonDrogheda。"
　　Hepulledherintohisarmsandheldher，strokingherbrighthair。"Meggie，IwishwithallmyheartIcouldmarryyou，neverbeapartfromyouagain。Idon’twanttoleaveyou……AndinawayI’llneverbefreeofyouagain。IwishIhadn’tcometoMatlock。Butwecan’tchangewhatweare，andperhapsit’sjustaswell。IknowthingsaboutmyselfIwouldneverhaveknownorfacedifIhadn’tcome。It’sbettertocontendwiththeknownthantheunknown。Iloveyou。Ialwayshave，andIalwayswill。Rememberit。"ThenextdayRobappearedforthefirsttimesincehehaddroppedRalph，andwaitedpatientlywhiletheysaidtheirfarewells。Obviouslynotacoupleofnewlyweds，forhe’dcomelaterthansheandwasleavingfirst。Notillicitlovers，either。Theyweremarried；itwaswrittenalloverthem。Buttheywerefondofeachother，veryfondindeed。LikehimandhisMissus；abigdifferenceinage，andthatmadeforagoodmarriage。"Goodbye，Meggie。"
　　"Goodbye，Ralph。Takecareofyourself。"
　　"Iwill。Andyou。"
　　Hebenttokissher；inspiteofherresolutionsheclungtohim，butwhenhepluckedherhandsfromaroundhisnecksheputthemstifflybehindherandkeptthemthere。
　　HegotintothecarandsatwhileRobreversed，thenstaredaheadthroughthewindscreenwithoutoncelookingbackather。Itwasararemanwhocoulddothat，Robreflected，withouteverhavingheardofOrpheus。TheydroveinsilencethroughtherainforestandcameatlasttotheseasideofMatlock，andthelongjetty。AstheyshookhandsRoblookedintohisface，wondering。Hehadneverseeneyessohuman，orsosad。ThealoofnesshaspassedfromArchbishopRalph’sgazeforever。
　　WhenMeggiecamebacktoHimmelhochAnneknewatonceshewouldloseher。Yes，itwasthesameMeggiecombsomuchmore，somehow。WhateverArchbishopRalphmighthavetoldhimselfbeforehewenttoMatlock，onMatlockthingshadgoneMeggie’swayatlast，nothis。Abouttime，too。ShetookJustineintoherarmsasifsheonlynowunderstoodwhathavingJustinemeant，andstoodrockingthelittlethingwhileshelookedaroundtheroom，smiling。HereyesmetAnne’s，soalive，soshiningwithemotionthatAnnefeltherowneyesfillwithreciprocaltearsofthatsamejoy。"Ican’tthankyouenough，Anne。"
　　"Pish，forwhat？"
　　"ForsendingRalph。YoumusthaveknownitwouldmeanI’dleaveLuke，soIthankyoujustthatmuchmore，dear。Oh，youhavenoideawhatitdidforme！IhadmadeupmymindIwasgoingtostaywithLuke，youknow。NowI’mgoingbacktoDrogheda，andI’mnevergoingtoleaveitagain。"
　　"IhatetoseeyougoandespeciallyIhatetoseeJustinego，butI’mgladforbothofyou，Meggie。Lukewillnevergiveyouanythingbutunhappiness。""Doyouknowhereheis？"
　　"BackfromtheCSR。He’scuttingnearIngham，"
　　"I’llhavetogoandseehim，tellhim。And，muchasIloathetheidea，sleepwithhim。"
　　"What？"
　　Theeyesshone。"I’mtwoweeksoverdue，andI’mneveradayoverdue。TheonlyothertimeIwas，Justinewasstarting。I’mpregnant，Anne，IknowIam！"
　　"MyGod！"AnnegaspedatMeggieasifshehadneverseenherbefore；andperhapsshehadnot。Shelickedherlipsandstammered，"Itcouldbeafalsealarm。"
　　ButMeggieshookherheadpositively。"Oh，no。I’mpregnant。Therearesomethingsonejustknows。"
　　"Anicepickleifyouare，"Annemuttered。
　　"Oh，Anne，don’tbeblind！Don’tyouseewhatthismeans？IcanneverhaveRalph，I’vealwaysknownIcouldneverhaveRalph。ButIhave，Ihave！"Shelaughed，grippingJustinesohardAnnewasfrightenedthebabywouldscream，butstrangelyshedidnot。"I’vegotthepartofRalphtheChurchcanneverhave，thepartofhimwhichcarriesonfromgenerationtogeneration。Throughmehe’llcontinuetolive，becauseIknowit’sgoingtobeason！Andthatsonwillhavesons，andthey’llhavesons-I’llbeatGodyet。I’velovedRalphsinceIwastenyearsold，andIsupposeI’llstillbelovinghimifIlivetobeahundred。Butheisn’tmine，wherehischildwillbe。Mine，Anne，mine！"
　　"Oh，Meggie！"Annesaidhelplessly。
　　Thepassiondied，theexhilaration；shebecameoncemorefamiliarMeggie，quietandsweetbutwiththefaintthreadofiron，thecapacitytobearmuch。OnlynowAnnetrodcarefully，wonderingjustwhatshehaddoneinsendingRalphdeBricassarttoMatlockIsland。Wasitpossibleforanyonetochangethismuch？Annedidn’tthinkso。Itmusthavebeenthereallthetime，sowellhiddenitspresencewasrarelysuspected。TherewasfarmorethanafaintthreadofironinMeggie；shewassolidsteel。"Meggie，ifyoulovemeatall，pleaseremembersomethingforme？"
　　Thegreyeyescrinkledatthecorners。"I’lltry！""I’vepickedupmostofLuddie’stomesovertheyears，whenI’verunoutofmyownbooks。EspeciallytheoneswiththeancientGreekstories，becausetheyfascinateme。TheysaytheGreekshaveawordforeverything，andthatthere’snohumansituationtheGreeksdidn’tdescribe。"
　　"Iknow。I’vereadsomeofLuddie’sbooks，too。"
　　"Thendon’tyouremember？TheGreekssayit’sasinagainstthegodstolovesomethingbeyondallreason。Anddoyourememberthattheysaywhensomeoneislovedso，theGodsbecomejealous，andstriketheobjectdownintheveryfullnessofitsflower？There’salessoninit，Meggie。It’sprofanetolovetoomuch。"
　　"Profane，Anne，that’sthekeyword！Ishan’tloveRalph’sbabyprofanely，butwiththepurityoftheBlessedMotherherself。"
　　Anne’sbrowneyeswereverysad。"Ah，butdidshelovepurely？TheobjectofherlovewasstruckdownintheveryfullnessofHisflower，wasn’tHe？"MeggieputJustineinhercot。"Whatmustbe，mustbe。RalphIcan’thave，hisbabyIcan。Ifeel……oh，asifthere’sapurposetomylifeafterall！That’sbeentheworstthingaboutthesethreeandahalfyears，Anne。Iwasbeginningtothinktherewasnopurposetomylife。"Shesmiledbriskly，decisively。"I’mgoingtoprotectthischildineverywayIcan，nomatterwhatthecosttomyself。Andthefirstthingisthatnoone，includingLuke，shalleverimplyithasnorighttotheonlynameI’matlibertytogiveit。TheverythoughtofsleepingwithLukemakesmeill，butI’lldoit。I’dsleepwiththeDevilhimselfifitcouldhelpthisbaby’sfuture。ThenI’mgoinghometoDrogheda，andIhopeIneverseeLukeagain。"Sheturnedfromthecot。"WillyouandLuddiecometoseeus？Droghedaalwayshasroomforfriends。"
　　"Onceayear，forasmanyyearsasyou’llhaveus。LuddieandIwanttoseeJustinegrowup。"
　　OnlythethoughtofRalph’sbabykeptMeggie’ssaggingcourageupasthelittlerailmotorrockedandjoltedthelongmilestoIngham。Haditnotbeenforthenewlifeshewassurewasgrowinginher，gettingintoabedwithLukeeveragainwouldhavebeentheultimatesinagainstherself；butforRalph’sbabyshewouldindeedhaveenteredintoacontractwiththeDevil。Fromapracticalviewpointitwasn’tgoingtobeeasyeither，sheknewthat。Butshehadlaidherplanswithwhatforesightshecould，andwithLuddie’said，oddlyenough。Ithadn’tbeenpossibletoconcealmuchfromhim；hewastooshrewd，andtoodeeplyinAnne’sconfidence。Hehadlookedat
　　Meggiesadly，shakenhishead，andthenproceededtogivehersomeexcellentadvice。Theactualaimofhermissionhadn’tbeenmentioned，ofcourse，butIwasasadeptataddingtwoandtwoasmostpeoplewhoreadmassivetomes。
　　"Youwon’twanttohavetotellLukeyou’releavinghimwhenhe’swornoutafterthecane，"saidLuddiedelicately。"Muchbetterifyoucatchhiminagoodmood，isn’tit？Bestthingis，seehimonaSaturdaynightoraSundayafterit’sbeenhisweekcooking。ThegrapevinesaysLuke’sthebestcookonthecuttingcircuitlearnedtocookwhenhewaslowmanontheshearingtotempole，andshearersaremuchfussiereatersthancutters。Meanscookingdoesn’tupsethim，youknow。Probablyfindsitaseasyasfallingoffalog。That’sthespeed，then，Meggie。Youslapthenewsonhimwhenhe’sfeelingrealgoodafteraweekinthebarrackskitchen。"
　　ItseemedtoMeggielatelythatshehadgonealongwayfromblushingdays；shelookedatLuddiesteadilywithoutgoingtheleastbitpink。"CouldyoufindoutwhichweekLukecooks，Luddie？OristhereanywayIcouldfindout，ifyoucan’t？"
　　"Oh，she’sapples，"hesaidcheerfully。"I’vegotmybranchesontheoldgrapevine。I’llfindout。"
　　ItwasmidSaturdayafternoonwhenMeggiecheckedintotheInghampubthatlookedthemostrespectable。AllNorthQueenslandtownswerefamousforonething:theyhadpubsonallfourcornersofeveryblock。Sheputhersmallcaseinherroom，thenmadeherwaybacktotheunlovelyfoyertofindatelephone。TherewasaRugbyLeaguefootballteamintownforapreseasontrainingmatch，andthecorridorswerefullofhalf-naked，whollydrunkplayerswhogreetedherappearancewithcheersandaffectionatepatsonthebackandbehind。Bythetimeshegottheuseofthephoneshewasshakingwithfright；everythingaboutthisventureseemedtobeanordeal。ButthroughthedinandtheloomingdrunkenfacesshemanagedtocallBraun’s，thefarmwhereLuke’sgangwascutting，andaskthatamessageberelayedtohimthathiswifewasinIngham，wantingtoseehim。Seeingherfear，thepublicanwalkedbacktoherroomwithher，andwaiteduntilheheardherturnthekey。
　　Meggieleanedagainstthedoor，limpwithrelief；ifitmeantshedidn’teatagainuntilshewasbackinDunny，shewasn’tventuringtothediningroom。Luckilythepublicanhadputherrightnexttothewomen’sbathroom，sosheoughttobeabletomakethatjourneywhennecessary。Themomentshethoughtherlegswouldholdherupshewobbledtothebedandsatonit，herheadbowed，lookingatherquiveringhands。
　　Allthewaydownshehadthoughtaboutthebestwayofgoingaboutit，andeverythinginhercried，Quickly，quickly！UntilcomingtoliveatHimmelhochshehadneverreadadescriptionofaseduction，andevennow，armedwithseveralsuchrecountings，shewasn’tconfidentofherabilitytogoaboutoneherself。Butthatwaswhatshehadtodo，forsheknewonceshestartedtotalktoLukeitwouldbeallover。Hertongueitchedtotellhimwhatshereallythoughtofhim。Butmorethanthat，thedesiretobebackonDroghedawithRalph’sbabymadesafeconsumedher。
　　Shiveringinthesultrysugaryairshetookoffherclothesandlaydownonthebed，eyesclosed，willingherselfnottothinkbeyondtheexpediencyofmakingRalph’sbabysafe。Thefootballersdidn’tworryLukeatallwhenheenteredthepubaloneatnineo’clock；bythenmostofthemwereinsensible，andthefewstillontheirfeetweretoofargonetonoticeanythingfartherawaythantheirbeerglasses。
　　Luddiehadbeenexactlyright；attheendofhisweek’sstintascookLukewasrested，eagerforachangeandoozinggoodwill。WhenBraun’syoungsonhadbroughtMeggie’smessagedowntothebarrackshewasjustwashingthelastofthesupperdishesandplanningtocycleintoIngham，joinArneandtheblokesontheircustomarySaturday-nightbinge。TheprospectofMeggiewasaveryagreeablealternative；eversincethatholidayontheAthertonhehadfoundhimselfwantingheroccasionallyinspiteofhisphysicalexhaustion。Onlyhishorrorofstartingheroffonthelet’s-settle-down-in-our-own-homecryhadkepthimawayfromHimmelhochwheneverhewasnearDunny。Butnowshehadcometohim，andhewasnotatallaversetoanightinbed。Sohefinishedthedishesinahurry，andwasluckyenoughtobepickedupbyatruckafterhehadpedaledascanthalfmile。ButashewalkedhisbikethethreeblocksfromwherehisridehaddroppedhimtothepubwhereMeggiewasstaying，someofhisanticipationflattened。Allthechemistshopswereclosed，andhedidn’thaveanyFrenchletters。Hestopped，staredinawindowfullofmoth-eaten，heat-stippledchocolatesanddeadblowflies，thenshrugged。Well，he’djusthavetotakehischances。Itwouldonlybetonight，andiftherewasababy，withanyluckitwouldbeaboythistime。Meggiejumpednervouslywhensheheardhisknock，gotoffthebedandpaddedovertothedoor。
　　"Whoisit？"shecalled。
　　"Luke，"camehisvoice。
　　Sheturnedthekey，openedthedooratinyway，andsteppedbehinditasLukepusheditwider。Themomenthewasinsidesheslammeditshut，andstoodlookingathim。Helookedather；atthebreastswhichwerebigger，rounder，moreenticingthanever，thenipplesnolongerpalepinkbutarichdarkredfromthebaby。Ifhehadbeeninneedofstimulitheyweremorethanadequate；hereachedouttopickherup，andcarriedhertothebed。
　　Bydaylightshestillhadn’tspokenaword，thoughhertouchhadwelcomedhimtoapitchoffeveredwanthehadneverbeforeexperienced。Nowshelaymovedawayfromhim，andcuriouslydivorcedfromhim。Hestretchedluxuriously，yawned，clearedhisthroat。"WhatbringsyoudowntoIngham，Meg？"heasked。
　　Herheadturned；sheregardedhimwithwide，contemptuouseyes。"Well，whatbringsyouhere？"herepeated，nettled。Noreply，onlythesamesteady，stinginggaze，asifshecouldn’tbebotheredanswering。Whichwasridiculous，afterthenight。Herlipsopened；shesmiled。"IcametotellyouI’mgoinghometoDrogheda，"shesaid。
　　Foramomenthedidn’tbelieveher，thenhelookedatherfacemorecloselyandsawshemeantit，allright。"Why？"heasked。"Itoldyouwhatwouldhappenifyoudidn’ttakemetoSydney，"shesaid。Hisastonishmentwasabsolutelygenuine。"But，Meg！That’sflamingeighteenmonthsago！AndIgaveyouaholiday！FourbloodyexpensiveweeksontheAtherton！Icouldn’taffordtotakeyoutoSydneyontopofthat！""You’vebeentoSydneytwicesincethen，bothtimeswithoutme，"shesaidstubbornly。"Icanunderstandthefirsttime，sinceIwasexpectingJustine，butheavenknowsIcouldhavedonewithaholidayawayfromTheWetthislastJanuary。"
　　"Oh，Christ！"
　　"Whataskinflintyouare，Luke，"shewentongently。"Twentythousandpoundsyou’vehadfromme，moneythat’srightfullymine，andyetyoubegrudgethefewmeaslypoundsitwouldhavecostyoutotakemetoSydney。Youandyourmoney！Youmakemesick。"
　　"Ihaven’ttouchedit，"hesaidfeebly。"It’sthere，everypennyofit，andmorebesides。"
　　"Yes，that’sright。Sittinginthebank，whereitalwayswill。Youhaven’tanyintentionofspendingit，haveyou？Youwanttoadoreit，likeagoldencalf。Admitit，Luke，you’reamiser。Andwhatanunforgivableidiotyouareintothebargain！Totreatyourwifeanddaughterthewayyouwouldn’tdreamoftreatingapairofdogs，toignoretheirexistences，letalonetheirneeds！Youcomplacent，conceited，self-centeredbastard！"White-faced，trembling，hesearchedforspeech；tohaveMegturnonhim，especiallyafterthenight，waslikebeingbittentodeathbyabutterfly。Theinjusticeofheraccusationsappalledhim，buttheredidn’tseemtobeanywayhecouldmakeherunderstandthepurityofhismotives。Womanlike，shesawonlytheobvious；shejustcouldn’tappreciatethegranddesignatbackofitall。
　　Sohesaid，"Oh，Meg！"intonesofbewilderment，despair，resignation。"I’veneverill-treatedyou，"headded。"No，Idefinitelyhaven’t！There’snoonecouldsayIwascrueltoyou。Noone！You’vehadenoughtoeat，aroofoveryourhead，you’vebeenwarm-was
　　"Oh，yes，"sheinterrupted……"That’sonethingI’llgrantyou。I’veneverbeenwarmerinmylife。"Sheshookherhead，laughed。"What’stheuse？It’sliketalkingtoabrickwall。"
　　"Imightsaythesame！"
　　"Byallmeansdo，"saidMeggieicily，gettingoffthebedandslippingonherpanties。"I’mnotgoingtodivorceyou，"shesaid。"Idon’twanttomarryagain。Ifyouwantadivorce，youknowwheretofindme。Technicallyspeaking，I’mtheoneatfault，aren’tI？I’mdesertingyou-oratleastthat’sthewaythecourtsinthiscountrywillseeit。Youandthejudgecancryoneachother’sshouldersabouttheperfidiesandingratitudeofwomen。"
　　"Ineverdesertedyou，"hemaintained。
　　"Youcankeepmytwentythousandpounds，Luke。Butnotanotherpennydoyouevergetfromme。MyfutureincomeI’mgoingtousetosupportJustine，andperhapsanotherchildifI’mlucky。"
　　"Sothat’sit！"hesaid。"Allyouwereafterwasanotherbloodybaby，wasn’tit？That’swhyyoucamedownhere-aswansong，alittlepresentfrommeforyoutotakebacktoDroghedawithyou！Anotherbloodybaby，notme！Itneverwasme，wasit？ToyouI’mjustabreeder！Christ，whatahave！""That’sallmostmenaretomostwomen，"shesaidmaliciously。"Youbringouttheworstinme，Luke，inmorewaysthanyou’lleverunderstand。Beofgoodcheer！I’veearnedyoumoremoneyinthelastthreeandahalfyearsthanthesugarhas。Ifthereisanotherchild，it’snoneofyourconcern。AsofthisminuteIneverwanttoseeyouagain，notaslongasIlive。"Shewasintoherclothes。Asshepickedupherhandbagandthelittlecasebythedoorsheturnedback，herhandontheknob。"Letmegiveyoualittlewordofadvice，Luke。Incaseyouevergetyourselfanotherwoman，whenyou’retoooldandtootiredtogiveyourselftothecaneanymore。Youcan’tkissfortoffee。Youopenyourmouthtoowide，youswallowawomanwholelikeapython。Saliva’sfine，butnotadelugeofit。"Shewipedherhandviciouslyacrosshermouth。"Youmakemewanttobesick！LukeO’neill，thegreatI-am！You’reanothing！"Aftershehadgonehesatontheedgeofthebedstaringatthecloseddoorforalongwhile。Thenheshruggedandstartedtodress。Notalongprocedure，inNorthQueensland。Justapairofshorts。IfhehurriedhecouldgetaridebacktothebarrackswithArneandtheblokes。GoodoldArne。Dearoldmate。Amanwasafool。Sexwasonething，butaman’smateswerequiteanother。
　　FIVE
　　1938-1953FEE
　　Notwantinganyonetoknowofherreturn，MeggierodeouttoDroghedaonthemailtruckwitholdBlueyWilliams，Justineinabasketontheseatbesideher。Blueywasdelightedtoseeherandeagertoknowwhatshehadbeendoingforthelastfouryears，butastheynearedthehomesteadhefellsilent，diviningherwishtocomehomeinpeace。
　　Backtobrownandsilver，backtodust，backtothatwonderfulpurityandsparenessNorthQueenslandsolacked。Noprofligategrowthhere，nohasteningofdecaytomakeroomformore；onlyaslow，wheelinginevitabilityliketheconstellations。Kangaroos，morethanever。Lovelylittlesymmetricalwilgas，roundandmatronly，almostcoy。Galahs，soaringinpinkwavesofundersidesabovethetruck。Emusatfullrun。Rabbits，hoppingoutoftheroadwithwhitepowderpuffslashingcheekily。Bleachedskeletonsofdeadtreesinthegrass。MiragesoftimberstandsonthefarcurvinghorizonastheycameacrosstheDibban-Dibbanplain，onlytheunsteadybluelinesacrosstheirbasestoindicatethatthetreesweren’treal。Thesoundshehadsomissedbutneverthoughttomiss，crowscarkingdesolately。Mistybrownveilsofdustwhippedalongbythedryautumnwindlikedirtyrain。Andthegrass，thesilver-beigegrassoftheGreatNorthwest，stretchingtotheskylikeabenediction。
　　Drogheda，Drogheda！Ghostgumsandsleepygiantpeppertreesa-humwithbees。Stockyardsandbutteryyellowsandstonebuildings，aliengreenlawnaroundthebighouse，autumnflowersinthegarden，wallflowersandzinnias，astersanddahlias，marigoldsandcalendulas，chrysanthemums，roses，roses。Thegravelofthebackyard，Mrs。Smithstandinggaping，thenlaughing，crying，MinnieandCatrunning，oldstringyarmslikechainsaroundherheart。ForDroghedawashome，andherewasherheart，foralways。Feecameouttoseewhatallthefusswasabout。"Hello，Mum。I’vecomehome。"