TheideainmymindwhenIwrotetohim,andthenatureofmyinquiries,willbeeasilyinferredfromhisreply。Hisletteransweredmyquestionsbycommunicatingtheseimportantfacts——
Inthefirstplace,`thelateSirPercivalGlyde,ofBlackwaterPark,’
hadneversetfootinVarneckHall。ThedeceasedgentlemanwasatotalstrangertoMajorDonthorne,andtoallhisfamily。
Inthesecondplace,`thelateMrPhilipFairlie,ofLimmeridgeHouse,’
hadbeen,inhisyoungerdays,theintimatefriendandconstantguestofMajorDonthorne。Havingrefreshedhismemorybylookingbacktooldlettersandotherpapers,theMajorwasinapositiontosaypositivelythatMrPhilipFairliewasstayingatVarneckHallinthemonthofAugust,eighteenhundredandtwenty-six,andthatheremainedtherefortheshootingduringthemonthofSeptemberandpartofOctoberfollowing。Hethenleft,tothebestoftheMajor’sbelief,forScotland,anddidnotreturntoVarneckHalltillafteralapseoftime,whenhereappearedinthecharacterofanewly-marriedman。
Takenbyitself,thisstatementwas,perhaps,oflittlepositivevalue,buttakeninconnectionwithcertainfacts,everyoneofwhicheitherMarianorIknewtobetrue,itsuggestedoneplainconclusionthatwas,toourminds,irresistible。
Knowing,now,thatMrPhilipFairliehadbeenatVarneckHallintheautumnofeighteenhundredandtwenty-six,andthatMrsCatherickhadbeenlivingthereinserviceatthesametime,weknewalso——first,thatAnnehadbeenborninJune,eighteenhundredandtwenty-seven;secondly,thatshehadalwayspresentedanextraordinarypersonalresemblancetoLaura;
and,thirdly,thatLauraherselfwasstrikinglylikeherfather-MrPhilipFairliehadbeenoneofthenotoriouslyhandsomemenofhistime。IndispositionentirelyunlikehisbrotherFrederick,hewasthespoiltdarlingofsociety,especiallyofthewomen——aneasy,light-hearted,impulsive,affectionateman——generoustoafault——constitutionallylaxinhisprinciples,andnotoriouslythoughtlessofmoralobligationswherewomenwereconcerned。
Suchwerethefactsweknew——suchwasthecharacteroftheman。Surelytheplaininferencethatfollowsneedsnopointingout?
Readbythenewlightwhichhadnowbrokenuponme,evenMrsCatherick’sletter,indespiteofherself,rendereditsmiteofassistancetowardsstrengtheningtheconclusionatwhichIhadarrived。ShehaddescribedMrsFairlieinwritingtomeas`plain-looking,’andashaving`entrappedthehandsomestmaninEnglandintomarryingher。’Bothassertionsweregratuitouslymade,andbothwerefalse。Jealousdislikewhich,insuchawomanasMrsCatherick,wouldexpressitselfinpettymaliceratherthannotexpressitselfatallappearedtometobetheonlyassignablecauseforthepeculiarinsolenceofherreferencetoMrsFairlie,undercircumstanceswhichdidnotnecessitateanyreferenceatall。
ThementionhereofMrsFairlie’snamenaturallysuggestsoneotherquestion。DidsheeversuspectwhosechildthelittlegirlbroughttoheratLimmeridgemightbe?
Marian’stestimonywaspositiveonthispoint。MrsFairlie’slettertoherhusband,whichhadbeenreadtomeinformerdays——theletterdescribingAnne’sresemblancetoLaura,andacknowledgingheraffectionateinterestinthelittlestranger——hadbeenwritten,beyondallquestion,inperfectinnocenceofheart。Itevenseemeddoubtful,onconsideration,whetherMrPhilipFairliehimselfhadbeennearerthanhiswifetoanysuspicionofthetruth。ThedisgracefullydeceitfulcircumstancesunderwhichMrsCatherickhadmarried,thepurposeofconcealmentwhichthemarriagewasintendedtoanswer,mightwellkeephersilentforcaution’ssake,perhapsforherownpride’ssakealso,evenassumingthatshehadthemeans,inhisabsence,ofcommunicatingwiththefatherofherunbornchild。
Asthissurmisefloatedthroughmymind,thereroseonmymemorytheremembranceoftheScripturedenunciationwhichwehaveallthoughtofinourtimewithwonderandwithawe:`Thesinsofthefathersshallbevisitedonthechildren。’Butforthefatalresemblancebetweenthetwodaughtersofonefather,theconspiracyofwhichAnnehadbeentheinnocentinstrumentandLauratheinnocentvictimcouldneverhavebeenplanned。
Withwhatunerringandterribledirectnessthelongchainofcircumstancesleddownfromthethoughtlesswrongcommittedbythefathertotheheartlessinjuryinflictedonthechild!
Thesethoughtscametome,andotherswiththem,whichdrewmymindawaytothelittleCumberlandchurchyardwhereAnneCathericknowlayburied。
IthoughtofthebygonedayswhenIhadmetherbyMrsFairlie’sgrave,andmetherforthelasttime。Ithoughtofherpoorhelplesshandsbeatingonthetombstone,andherweary,yearningwords,murmuredtothedeadremainsofherprotectressandherfriend:`Oh,ifIcoulddie,andbehiddenandatrestwithyou!’Littlemorethanayearhadpassedsinceshebreathedthatwish;andhowinscrutably,howawfully,ithadbeenfulledIThewordsshehadspokentoLaurabytheshoresofthelake,theverywordshadnowcomerue。`Oh,ifIcouldonlybeburiedwithyourmotherIIfIcouldonlywakeathersidewhentheangel’strumpetsoundsandthegravesgiveuptheirdeadattheresurrection!’Throughwhatmortalcrimeandhorror,throughwhatdarkestwindingsofthewaydowntodeath——thelostcreaturehadwanderedinGod’sleadingtothelasthomethat,living,sheneverhopedtoreach!InthatsacredrestIleaveher——inthatdreadcompanionshipletherremainundisturbed。
Sotheghostlyfigurewhichhashauntedthesepages,asithauntedmylife,goesdownintotheimpenetrablegloom。Likeashadowshefirstcametomeinthelonelinessofthenight。Likeashadowshepassesawayinthelonelinessofthedead。
[NextChapter][TableofContents]WomaninWhite:Chapter38[PreviousChapter][TableofContents]Chapter38HARTRIGHT’SNARRATIVEIFourmonthselapsed。Aprilcame——themonthofspring——themonthofchange。
Thecourseoftimehadflowedthroughtheintervalsincethewinterpeacefullyandhappilyinournewhome。Ihadturnedmylongleisuretogoodaccount,hadlargelyincreasedmysourcesofemployment,andhadplacedourmeansofsubsistenceonsurergrounds。Freedfromthesuspenseandtheanxietywhichhadtriedhersosorelyandhungoverhersolong,Marian’sspiritsrallied,andhernaturalenergyofcharacterbegantoassertitselfagain,withsomething,ifnotall,ofthefreedomandthevigourofformertimes。
Morepliableunderchangethanhersister,Laurashowedmoreplainlytheprogressmadebythehealinginfluencesofhernewlife。Thewornandwastedlookwhichhadprematurelyagedherfacewasfastleavingit,andtheexpressionwhichhadbeenthefirstofitscharmsinpastdayswasthefirstofitsbeautiesthatnowreturned。Myclosestobservationsofherdetectedbutoneseriousresultoftheconspiracywhichhadoncethreatenedherreasonandherlife。Hermemoryofevents,fromtheperiodofherleavingBlackwaterParktotheperiodofourmeetingintheburial-groundofLimmeridgeChurch,waslostbeyondallhopeofrecovery。Attheslightestreferencetothattimeshechangedandtrembledstill,herwordsbecameconfused,hermemorywanderedandlostitselfashelplesslyasever。Here,andhereonly,thetracesofthepastlaydeep——toodeeptobeeffaced。
Inallelseshewasnowsofaronthewaytorecoverythat。onherbestandbrightestdays,shesometimeslookedandspokeliketheLauraofoldtimes。Thehappychangewroughtitsnaturalresultinusboth。Fromthelongslumber,onhersideandonmine,thoseimperishablememoriesofourpastlifeinCumberlandnowawoke,whichwereoneandallalike,thememoriesofourlove。
Graduallyandinsensiblyourdailyrelationstowardseachotherbecameconstrained。ThefondwordswhichIhadspokentohersonaturally,inthedaysofhersorrowandhersuffering,falteredstrangelyonmylips。
Inthetimewhenmydreadoflosingherwasmostpresenttomymind,I
hadalwayskissedherwhensheleftmeatnightandwhenshemetmeinthemorning。Thekissseemednowtohavedroppedbetweenus——tobelostoutofourlives。Ourhandsbegantotrembleagainwhentheymet。WehardlyeverlookedlongatoneanotheroutofMarian’spresence。Thetalkoftenflaggedbetweenuswhenwewerealone。WhenItouchedherbyaccidentI
feltmyheartbeatingfast,asitusedtobeatatLimmeridgeHouse——I
sawthelovelyansweringflushglowingagaininhercheeks,asifwewerebackamongtheCumberlandHillsinourpastcharactersofmasterandpupiloncemore。Shehadlongintervalsofsilenceandthoughtfulness,anddeniedshehadbeenthinkingwhenMarianaskedherthequestion。Isurprisedmyselfonedayneglectingmyworktodreamoverthelittlewater-colourportraitofherwhichIhadtakeninthesummer-housewherewefirstmet——justasIusedtoneglectMrFairlie’sdrawingstodreamoverthesamelikenesswhenitwasnewlyfinishedinthebygonetime。Changedasallthecircumstancesnowwere,ourpositiontowardseachotherinthegoldendaysofourfirstcompanionshipseemedtoberevivedwiththerevivalofourlove。ItwasasifTimehaddriftedusbackonthewreckofourearlyhopestotheoldfamiliarshore!
ToanyotherwomanIcouldhavespokenthedecisivewordswhichIstillhesitatedtospeaktoher。Theutterhelplessnessofherposition——herfriendlessdependenceonalltheforbearinggentlenessthatIcouldshowher——myfearoftouchingtoosoonsomesecretsensitivenessinherwhichmyinstinctasamanmightnothavebeenfineenoughtodiscover——theseconsiderations,andotherslikethem,keptmeself-distrustfullysilent。
AndyetIknewthattherestraintonbothridesmustbeended,thattherelationsinwhichwestoodtowardsoneanothermustbealteredinsomesettledmannerforthefuture,andthatitrestedwithme,inthefirstinstance,torecognisethenecessityforachange。
ThemoreIthoughtofourposition,thehardertheattempttoalteritappeared,whilethedomesticconditionsinwhichwethreehadbeenlivingtogethersincethewinterremainedundisturbed。Icannotaccountforthecapriciousstateofmindinwhichthisfeelingoriginated,buttheideaneverthelesspossessedmethatsomepreviouschangeofplaceandcircumstances,somesuddenbreakinthequietmonotonyofourlives,somanagedastovarythehomeaspectunderwhichwehadbeenaccustomedtoseeeachother,mightpreparethewayformetospeak,andmightmakeiteasierandlessembarrassingforLauraandMariantohear。
Withthispurposeinview,Isaid,onemorning,thatIthoughtwehadallearnedalittleholidayandachangeofscene。Aftersomeconsideration,itwasdecidedthatweshouldgoforafortnighttotheseaside。
OnthenextdayweleftFulhamforaquiettownonthesouthcoast。
Atthatearlyseasonoftheyearweweretheonlyvisitorsintheplace。
Thecliffs,thebeach,andthewalksinlandwereallinthesolitaryconditionwhichwasmostwelcometous。Theairwasmild——theprospectsoverhillandwoodanddownwerebeautifullyvariedbytheshiftingAprillightandshade,andtherestlesssealeaptunderourwindows,asifitfelt,liketheland,theglowandfreshnessofspring。