`Yourladyshipwillpardonmyfreedom,’Iremarked,inconclusion,`butitissaid,``bytheirfruitsyeshallknowthem。’’IamsuretheCount’sconstantkindnessandconstantattention,fromtheverybeginningofMissHalcombe’sillness,meritourbestconfidenceandesteem。Evenhislordship’sseriousmisunderstandingwithMrDawsonwasentirelyattributabletohisanxietyonMissHalcombe’saccount。’
`Whatmisunderstanding?’inquiredherladyship,withalookofsuddeninterest。
IrelatedtheunhappycircumstancesunderwhichMrDawsonhadwithdrawnhisattendance——mentioningthemallthemorereadilybecauseIdisapprovedofSirPercival’scontinuingtoconcealwhathadhappenedashehaddoneinmypresencefromtheknowledgeofLadyGlyde。
Herladyshipstartedup,witheveryappearanceofbeingadditionallyagitatedandalarmedbywhatIhadtoldher。
`Worse!worsethanIthought!’shesaid,walkingabouttheroom,inabewilderedmanner。`TheCountknewMrDawsonwouldneverconsenttoMarian’stakingajourney——hepurposelyinsultedthedoctortogethimoutofthehouse。’
`Oh,mylady!mylady!’Iremonstrated。
`MrsMichelson!’shewentonvehemently,`nowordsthateverwerespokenwillpersuademethatmysisterisinthatman’spowerandinthatman’shousewithherownconsent-Myhorrorofhimissuch,thatnothingSirPercivalcouldsay,andnolettersmyunclecouldwrite,wouldinduceme,ifIhadonlymyownfeelingstoconsult,toeat,drink,orsleepunderhisroof。ButmymiseryofsuspenseaboutMariangivesmethecouragetofollowheranywhere,tofollowherevenintoCountFosco’shouse。’
Ithoughtitright,atthispoint,tomentionthatMissHalcombehadalreadygoneontoCumberland,accordingtoSirPercival’saccountofthematter。
`Iamafraidtobelieveit!’answeredherladyship。`Iamafraidsheisstillinthatman’shouse。IfIamwrong,ifshehasreallygonetoLimmeridgeIamresolvedIwillnotsleeptomorrownightunderCountFosco’sroof。Mydearestfriendintheworld,nexttomysister,livesnearLondon。
Youhaveheardme,youhaveheardMissHalcombe,speakofMrsVesey?I
meantowrite,andproposetosleepatherhouse。Idon’tknowhowIshallgetthere——Idon’tknowhowIshallavoidtheCount——buttothatrefugeIwillescapeinsomeway,ifmysisterhasgonetoCumberland。AllIaskofyoutodo,istoseeyourselfthatmylettertoMrsVeseygoestoLondontonight,ascertainlyasSirPercival’slettergoestoCountFosco。Ihavereasonsfornottrustingthepost-bagdownstairs。Willyoukeepmysecret,andhelpmeinthis?itisthelastfavour,perhaps,thatIshalleveraskofyou。’
Ihesitated,Ithoughtitallverystrange,Ialmostfearedthatherladyship’smindhadbeenalittleaffectedbyrecentanxietyandsuffering。
Atmyownrisk,however,Iendedbygivingmyconsent。Iftheletterhadbeenaddressedtoastranger,ortoanyonebutaladysowellknowntomebyreportasMrsVesey,Imighthaverefused。IthankGod——lookingtowhathappenedafterwards——IthankGodIneverthwartedthatwish,oranyother,whichLadyGlydeexpressedtome,onthelastdayofherresidenceatBlackwaterPark。
Theletterwaswrittenandgivenintomyhands。Imyselfputitintothepost-boxinthevillagethatevening。
WesawnothingmoreofSirPercivalfortherestoftheday。
Islept,byLadyGlyde’sowndesire,inthenextroomtohers,withthedooropenbetweenus。Therewassomethingsostrangeanddreadfulinthelonelinessandemptinessofthehouse,thatIwasglad,onmyside,tohaveacompanionnearme。Herladyshipsatuplate,readinglettersandburningthem,andemptyingherdrawersandcabinetsoflittlethingssheprized,asifsheneverexpectedtoreturntoBlackwaterPark。Hersleepwassadlydisturbedwhensheatlastwenttobed——shecriedoutinitseveraltimes,oncesoloudthatshewokeherself。Whateverherdreamswere,shedidnotthinkfittocommunicatethemtome。Perhaps,inmysituation,Ihadnorighttoexpectthatsheshoulddoso。Itmatterslittlenow。
Iwassorryforher,Iwasindeedheartilysorryforherallthesame。
Thenextdaywasfineandsunny。SirPercivalcameup,afterbreakfast,totellusthatthechaisewouldbeatthedoorataquartertotwelve——thetraintoLondonstoppingatourstationattwentyminutesafter。
HeinformedLadyGlydethathewasobligedtogoout,butaddedthathehopedtobebackbeforesheleft。Ifanyunforeseenaccidentdelayedhim,Iwastoaccompanyhertothestation,andtotakespecialcarethatshewasintimeforthetrain。SirPercivalcommunicatedthesedirectionsveryhastily——walkinghereandthereabouttheroomallthetime。Herladyshiplookedattentivelyafterhimwhereverhewent。Heneveroncelookedatherinreturn。
Sheonlyspokewhenhehaddone,andthenshestoppedhimasheapproachedthedoor,byholdingoutherhand。
`Ishallseeyounomore,’shesaid。inaverymarkedmanner。`Thisisourparting——ourparting,itmaybeforever。Willyoutrytoforgiveme,Percival,asheartilyasIforgiveyou?’
Hisfaceturnedofanawfulwhitenessallover,andgreatbeadsofperspirationbrokeoutonhisbaldforehead。`Ishallcomeback,’hesaid,andmadeforthedoor,ashastilyasifhiswife’sfarewellwordshadfrightenedhimoutoftheroom。
IhadneverlikedSirPercival,butthemannerinwhichheleftLadyGlydemademefeelashamedofhavingeatenhisbreadandlivedinhisservice。
IthoughtofsayingafewcomfortingandChristianwordstothepoorlady,buttherewassomethinginherface,asshelookedafterherhusbandwhenthedoorclosedonhim,thatmademealtermymindandkeepsilenceAtthetimenamedthechaisedrewupatthegates。Herladyshipwasright——SirPercivalnevercameback。Iwaitedforhimtillthelastmoment,andwaitedinvain。
Nopositiveresponsibilitylayonmyshoulders,andyetIdidnotfeeleasyinmymind。`Itisofyourownfreewill,’Isaid,asthechaisedrovethroughthelodge-gates,`thatyourladyshipgoestoLondon?’
`Iwillgoanywhere,’sheanswered,`toendthedreadfulsuspensethatIamsufferingatthismoment。’
ShehadmademefeelalmostasanxiousandasuncertainaboutMissHalcombeasshefeltherself。Ipresumedtoaskhertowritemealine,ifallwentwellinLondon。Sheanswered,`Mostwillingly,MrsMichelson。’
`Weallhaveourcrossestobear,mylady,’Isaid,seeinghersilentandthoughtful,aftershehadpromisedtowrite。
Shemadenoreply——sheseemedtobetoomuchwrappedupinherownthoughtstoattendtome。
`Ifearyourladyshiprestedbadlylastnight,’Iremarked,afterwaitingalittle。
`Yes,’shesaid,Iwasterriblydisturbedbydreams。’
`Indeed,mylady?’Ithoughtshewasgoingtotellmeherdreams,butno,whenshespokenextitwasonlytoaskaquestion。
`YoupostedthelettertoMrsVeseywithyourownhands?’
`Yes,myLady。’
`DidSirPercivalsay,yesterday,thatCountFoscowastomeetmeattheterminusinLondon?’
`Hedid,mylady。’
ShesighedheavilywhenIansweredthatlastquestion,andsaidnomore。
Wearrivedatthestation,withhardlytwominutestospare。Thegardenerwhohaddrivenusmanagedabouttheluggage,whileItooktheticket。
ThewhistleofthetrainwassoundingwhenIjoinedherladyshipontheplatform。Shelookedverystrangely,andpressedherhandoverherheart,asifsomesuddenpainorfrighthadovercomeheratthatmoment。
`Iwishyouweregoingwithme!’shesaid,catchingeagerlyatmyarmwhenIgavehertheticket。
Iftherehadbeentime,ifIhadfeltthedaybeforeasIfeltthen,Iwouldhavemademyarrangementstoaccompanyher,eventhoughthedoingsohadobligedmetogiveSirPercivalwarningonthespot。Asitwas,herwishes,expressedatthelastmomentonly,wereexpressedtoolateformetocomplywiththem。SheseemedtounderstandthisherselfbeforeIcouldexplainit,anddidnotrepeatherdesiretohavemeforatravellingcompanion。Thetraindrewupattheplatform。Shegavethegardenerapresentforhischildren,andtookmyhand,inhersimpleheartymanner,beforeshegotintothecarriage。
`Youhavebeenverykindtomeandtomysister,’shesaid——`kindwhenwewerebothfriendless。Ishallrememberyougratefully,aslongasIlivetorememberanyone。Good-bye——andGodblessyou!’
Shespokethosewordswithatoneandalookwhichbroughtthetearsintomyeyes——shespokethemasifshewasbiddingmefarewellforever。
`Good-bye,mylady,’Isaid,puttingherintothecarriage,andtryingtocheerher;`good-bye,forthepresentonly;good-bye,withmybestandkindestwishesforhappiertimes。’
Sheshookherhead,andshudderedasshesettledherselfinthecarriage。
Theguardclosedthedoor。`Doyoubelieveindreams?’shewhisperedtomeatthewindow。`Mydreams,lastnight,weredreamsIhaveneverhadbefore。Theterrorofthemishangingovermestill。’ThewhistlesoundedbeforeIcouldanswer,andthetrainmoved。Herpalequietfacelookedatmeforthelasttime——lookedsorrowfullyandsolemnlyfromthewindow。
Shewavedherhand,andIsawhernomore。
Towardsfiveo’clockontheafternoonofthatsameday,havingalittletimetomyselfinthemidstofthehouseholddutieswhichnowpresseduponme,Isatdownaloneinmyownroom,totryandcomposemymindwiththevolumeofmyhusband’sSermons。ForthefirsttimeinmylifeIfoundmyattentionwanderingoverthosepiousandcheeringwords。ConcludingthatLadyGlyde’sdeparturemusthavedisturbedmefarmoreseriouslythanI