April5。Iamalmostdevouredbyennui。Punditistheonlyconversiblepersononboard；andhe，poorsoul！canspeakofnothingbutantiquities。HehasbeenoccupiedallthedayintheattempttoconvincemethattheancientAmriccansgovernedthemselves！dideveranybodyhearofsuchanabsurdity？thattheyexistedinasortofevery-man-for-himselfconfederacy，afterthefashionofthe“prairiedogs“thatwereadofinfable。Hesaysthattheystartedwiththequeerestideaconceivable，viz：thatallmenarebornfreeandequalthisintheveryteethofthelawsofgradationsovisiblyimpresseduponallthingsbothinthemoralandphysicaluniverse。Everyman“voted。”astheycalleditthatistosaymeddledwithpublicaffairsuntilatlength，itwasdiscoveredthatwhatiseverybody’sbusinessisnobody’s，andthatthe“Republic“sotheabsurdthingwascalledwaswithoutagovernmentatall。Itisrelated，however，thatthefirstcircumstancewhichdisturbed，veryparticularly，theself-complacencyofthephilosopherswhoconstructedthis“Republic。”wasthestartlingdiscoverythatuniversalsuffragegaveopportunityforfraudulentschemes，bymeansofwhichanydesirednumberofvotesmightatanytimebepolled，withoutthepossibilityofpreventionorevendetection，byanypartywhichshouldbemerelyvillainousenoughnottobeashamedofthefraud。Alittlereflectionuponthisdiscoverysufficedtorenderevidenttheconsequences，whichwerethatrascalitymustpredominateinaword，thatarepublicangovernmentcouldneverbeanythingbutarascallyone。Whilethephilosophers，however，werebusiedinblushingattheirstupidityinnothavingforeseentheseinevitableevils，andintentupontheinventionofnewtheories，thematterwasputtoanabruptissuebyafellowofthenameofMob，whotookeverythingintohisownhandsandsetupadespotism，incomparisonwithwhichthoseofthefabulousZerosandHellofagabaluseswererespectableanddelectable。ThisMobaforeigner，by-the-by，issaidtohavebeenthemostodiousofallmenthateverencumberedtheearth。Hewasagiantinstature
　　insolent，rapacious，filthy，hadthegallofabullockwiththeheartofahyenaandthebrainsofapeacock。Hedied，atlength，bydintofhisownenergies，whichexhaustedhim。Nevertheless，hehadhisuses，aseverythinghas，howevervile，andtaughtmankindalessonwhichtothisdayitisinnodangerofforgettingnevertorundirectlycontrarytothenaturalanalogies。AsforRepublicanism，noanalogycouldbefoundforituponthefaceoftheearthunlessweexceptthecaseofthe“prairiedogs。”anexceptionwhichseemstodemonstrate，ifanything，thatdemocracyisaveryadmirableformofgovernmentfordogs。
　　April6。LastnighthadafineviewofAlphaLyrae，whosedisk，throughourcaptain’sspy-glass，subtendsanangleofhalfadegree，lookingverymuchasoursundoestothenakedeyeonamistyday。
　　AlphaLyrae，althoughsoverymuchlargerthanoursun，bytheby，resembleshimcloselyasregardsitsspots，itsatmosphere，andinmanyotherparticulars。Itisonlywithinthelastcentury，Pundittellsme，thatthebinaryrelationexistingbetweenthesetwoorbsbeganeventobesuspected。Theevidentmotionofoursystemintheheavenswasstrangetosay！referredtoanorbitaboutaprodigiousstarinthecentreofthegalaxy。Aboutthisstar，oratalleventsaboutacentreofgravitycommontoalltheglobesoftheMilkyWayandsupposedtobenearAlcyoneinthePleiades，everyoneoftheseglobeswasdeclaredtoberevolving，ourownperformingthecircuitinaperiodof117，000，000ofyears！We，withourpresentlights，ourvasttelescopicimprovements，andsoforth，ofcoursefinditdifficulttocomprehendthegroundofanideasuchasthis。ItsfirstpropagatorwasoneMudler。Hewasled，wemustpresume，tothiswildhypothesisbymereanalogyinthefirstinstance；but，thisbeingthecase，heshouldhaveatleastadheredtoanalogyinitsdevelopment。
　　Agreatcentralorbwas，infact，suggested；sofarMudlerwasconsistent。Thiscentralorb，however，dynamically，shouldhavebeengreaterthanallitssurroundingorbstakentogether。Thequestionmightthenhavebeenasked“Whydowenotseeit？”we，especially，whooccupythemidregionoftheclustertheverylocalitynearwhich，atleast，mustbesituatedthisinconceivablecentralsun。Theastronomer，perhaps，atthispoint，tookrefugeinthesuggestionofnon-luminosity；andhereanalogywassuddenlyletfall。Butevenadmittingthecentralorbnon-luminous，howdidhemanagetoexplainitsfailuretoberenderedvisiblebytheincalculablehostofglorioussunsglaringinalldirectionsaboutit？Nodoubtwhathefinallymaintainedwasmerelyacentreofgravitycommontoalltherevolvingorbsbuthereagainanalogymusthavebeenletfall。Oursystemrevolves，itistrue，aboutacommoncentreofgravity，butitdoesthisinconnectionwithandinconsequenceofamaterialsunwhosemassmorethancounterbalancestherestofthesystem。Themathematicalcircleisacurvecomposedofaninfinityofstraightlines；butthisideaofthecirclethisideaofitwhich，inregardtoallearthlygeometry，weconsiderasmerelythemathematical，incontradistinctionfromthepractical，ideais，insoberfact，thepracticalconceptionwhichalonewehaveanyrighttoentertaininrespecttothoseTitaniccircleswithwhichwehavetodeal，atleastinfancy，whenwesupposeoursystem，withitsfellows，revolvingaboutapointinthecentreofthegalaxy。Letthemostvigorousofhumanimaginationsbutattempttotakeasinglesteptowardthecomprehensionofacircuitsounutterable！Iwouldscarcelybeparadoxicaltosaythataflashoflightningitself，travellingforeveruponthecircumferenceofthisinconceivablecircle，wouldstillforeverbetravellinginastraightline。Thatthepathofoursunalongsuchacircumferencethatthedirectionofoursysteminsuchanorbitwould，toanyhumanperception，deviateintheslightestdegreefromastraightlineeveninamillionofyears，isapropositionnottobeentertained；andyettheseancientastronomerswereabsolutelycajoled，itappears，intobelievingthatadecisivecurvaturehadbecomeapparentduringthebriefperiodoftheirastronomicalhistoryduringthemerepointduringtheutternothingnessoftwoorthreethousandyears！
　　Howincomprehensible，thatconsiderationssuchasthisdidnotatonceindicatetothemthetruestateofaffairsthatofthebinaryrevolutionofoursunandAlphaLyraearoundacommoncentreofgravity！
　　April7。Continuedlastnightourastronomicalamusements。HadafineviewofthefiveNeptunianasteroids，andwatchedwithmuchinteresttheputtingupofahugeimpostonacoupleoflintelsinthenewtempleatDaphnisinthemoon。Itwasamusingtothinkthatcreaturessodiminutiveasthelunarians，andbearingsolittleresemblancetohumanity，yetevincedamechanicalingenuitysomuchsuperiortoourown。Onefindsitdifficult，too，toconceivethevastmasseswhichthesepeoplehandlesoeasily，tobeaslightasourownreasontellsustheyactuallyare。
　　April8。Eureka！Punditisinhisglory。AballoonfromKanadawspokeusto-dayandthrewonboardseverallatepapers；theycontainsomeexceedinglycuriousinformationrelativetoKanawdianorratherAmriccanantiquities。Youknow，Ipresume，thatlaborershaveforsomemonthsbeenemployedinpreparingthegroundforanewfountainatParadise，theEmperor’sprincipalpleasuregarden。Paradise，itappears，hasbeen，literallyspeaking，anislandtimeoutofmind
　　thatistosay，itsnorthernboundarywasalwaysasfarbackasanyrecordextendsarivulet，orratheraverynarrowarmofthesea。
　　Thisarmwasgraduallywideneduntilitattaineditspresentbreadthamile。Thewholelengthoftheislandisninemiles；thebreadthvariesmaterially。TheentireareasoPunditsayswas，abouteighthundredyearsago，denselypackedwithhouses，someofthemtwentystorieshigh；landforsomemostunaccountablereasonbeingconsideredasespeciallypreciousjustinthisvicinity。Thedisastrousearthquake，however，oftheyear2050，sototallyuprootedandoverwhelmedthetownforitwasalmosttoolargetobecalledavillagethatthemostindefatigableofourantiquarianshaveneveryetbeenabletoobtainfromthesiteanysufficientdataintheshapeofcoins，medalsorinscriptionswherewithtobuildupeventheghostofatheoryconcerningthemanners，customs，&c。，&c。，&c。，oftheaboriginalinhabitants。Nearlyallthatwehavehithertoknownofthemis，thattheywereaportionoftheKnickerbockertribeofsavagesinfestingthecontinentatitsfirstdiscoverybyRecorderRiker，aknightoftheGoldenFleece。Theywerebynomeansuncivilized，however，butcultivatedvariousartsandevensciencesafterafashionoftheirown。Itisrelatedofthemthattheywereacuteinmanyrespects，butwereoddlyafflictedwithmonomaniaforbuildingwhat，intheancientAmriccan，wasdenominated“churches“
　　akindofpagodainstitutedfortheworshipoftwoidolsthatwentbythenamesofWealthandFashion。Intheend，itissaid，theislandbecame，ninetenthsofit，church。Thewomen，too，itappears，wereoddlydeformedbyanaturalprotuberanceoftheregionjustbelowthesmallofthebackalthough，mostunaccountably，thisdeformitywaslookeduponaltogetherinthelightofabeauty。Oneortwopicturesofthesesingularwomenhaveinfact，beenmiraculouslypreserved。
　　Theylookveryodd，verylikesomethingbetweenaturkey-cockandadromedary。
　　Well，thesefewdetailsarenearlyallthathavedescendedtousrespectingtheancientKnickerbockers。Itseems，however，thatwhiledigginginthecentreoftheemperorsgarden，which，youknow，coversthewholeisland，someoftheworkmenunearthedacubicalandevidentlychiseledblockofgranite，weighingseveralhundredpounds。
　　Itwasingoodpreservation，havingreceived，apparently，littleinjuryfromtheconvulsionwhichentombedit。Ononeofitssurfaceswasamarbleslabwithonlythinkofit！aninscriptionalegibleinscription。Punditisinecstacies。Upondetachingtheslab，acavityappeared，containingaleadenboxfilledwithvariouscoins，alongscrollofnames，severaldocumentswhichappeartoresemblenewspapers，withothermattersofintenseinteresttotheantiquarian！TherecanbenodoubtthatallthesearegenuineAmriccanrelicsbelongingtothetribecalledKnickerbocker。Thepapersthrownonboardourballoonarefilledwithfac-similesofthecoins，MSS。，typography，&c。，&c。IcopyforyouramusementtheKnickerbockerinscriptiononthemarbleslab：-
　　ThisCornerStoneofaMonumenttoTheMemoryofGEORGEWASHINGTON
　　WasLaidWithAppropriateCeremoniesonthe19thDayofOctober，1847
　　TheanniversaryofthesurrenderofLordCornwallistoGeneralWashingtonatYorktownA。D。1781
　　UndertheAuspicesoftheWashingtonMonumentAssociationofthecityofNewYorkThis，asIgiveit，isaverbatimtranslationdonebyPundithimself，sotherecanbenomistakeaboutit。Fromthefewwordsthuspreserved，wegleanseveralimportantitemsofknowledge，nottheleastinterestingofwhichisthefactthatathousandyearsagoactualmonumentshadfallenintodisuseaswasallveryproper
　　thepeoplecontentingthemselves，aswedonow，withamereindicationofthedesigntoerectamonumentatsomefuturetime；acorner-stonebeingcautiouslylaidbyitself“solitaryandalone“
　　excusemeforquotingthegreatAmericanpoetBenton！，asaguaranteeofthemagnanimousintention。Weascertain，too，verydistinctly，fromthisadmirableinscription，thehowaswellasthewhereandthewhat，ofthegreatsurrenderinquestion。Astothewhere，itwasYorktownwhereverthatwas，andastothewhat，itwasGeneralCornwallisnodoubtsomewealthydealerincorn。Hewassurrendered。Theinscriptioncommemoratesthesurrenderofwhat？
　　why，“ofLordCornwallis。”Theonlyquestioniswhatcouldthesavageswishhimsurrenderedfor。Butwhenwerememberthatthesesavageswereundoubtedlycannibals，weareledtotheconclusionthattheyintendedhimforsausage。Astothehowofthesurrender，nolanguagecanbemoreexplicit。LordCornwalliswassurrenderedforsausage“undertheauspicesoftheWashingtonMonumentAssociation“
　　nodoubtacharitableinstitutionforthedepositingofcorner-stones。But，Heavenblessme！whatisthematter？Ah，Iseetheballoonhascollapsed，andweshallhaveatumbleintothesea。Ihave，therefore，onlytimeenoughtoaddthat，fromahastyinspectionofthefac-similesofnewspapers，&c。，&c。，IfindthatthegreatmeninthosedaysamongtheAmriccans，wereoneJohn，asmith，andoneZacchary，atailor。
　　Good-bye，untilIseeyouagain。Whetheryouevergetthisletterornotispointoflittleimportance，asIwritealtogetherformyownamusement。IshallcorktheMS。upinabottle，however，andthrowitintothesea。
　　Yourseverlastingly，PUNDITA。