ASimlafuneralwiththeclergymanriding，themournersriding，andthecoffincreakingasitswingsbetweenthebearer~，isoneofthemostdepressingthingsonthisearth，particularlywhentheprocessionpassesunderthewet，dankdipbeneaththeRockcliffeHotel，wherethesunisshutoutandallthebillstreamsarewailingandweepingtogetherastheygodownthevalleysOccasionallyfolktendthegraves，butweinIndiashiftandaretransferredsooftenthat，attheendofthesecondyear，theDeadhavenofriends-onlyacquaintanceswhoarefartoobusyamusingthemsel“esupthehilltoattendtooldpartnersTheideaofusingaCemeteryasarendezvousisdistinctlyafeminineoneAmanwouldhavesaidsimply“LetpeopletalkWe’llgodowntheMall。”Awomanismadedifferently，especiallyifshebesuchawomanastheMan’sWifeSheandtheTertiumQuidenjoyedeachother’ssocietyamongthegravesofmenandwomenwhomtheyhadknownanddancedwithaforetime。
　　Theyusedtotakeabighorse-blanketandsitonthegrassalittletotheleftofthelowerend，wherethereisadipinthegroundandwheretheoccupiedgravesstopshortandtheready-madeonesarenotreadyEachwell-regulatedIndiaCemeterykeepshalfadozengravespermanentlyopenforcontingenciesandincidentalwearandtearIntheHillsthesearemoreusuallybaby’s，’ize，becausechildrenwhocomeupweakenedandsickfromthePlainsoftensuccumbtotheeffectsoftheRainsintheHillsorgetpneumoniafromtheirayahstakingthemthroughdamppine-woodsafterthesunhassetInCantonments，ofcourse，theman’ssizeismoreinrequest；thesearrangementsvaryingwiththeclimateandpopulation。
　　OnedaywhentheMan’sWifeandtheTertiumQuidhadjustarrivedintheCemetery，theysawsomecooliesbreakinggroundTheyhadmarkedoutafull-sizegrave，andtheTertiumQuidaskedthemwhetheranySahibwassickTheysaidthattheydidnotknow；butitwasanorderthattheyshoulddigaSahib’sgrave。
　　“Workaway。”saidtheTertiumQuid，“andlet’sseehowit’sdone。”
　　Thecooliesworkedaway，andtheMan’sWifeandtheTertiumQuidwatchedandtalkedforacoupleofhourswhilethegravewasbeingdeepenedThenacoolie，takingtheearthinblanketsasitwasthrownup，jumpedoverthegrave。
　　“That’~queer。”saidtheTertiumQuid“Where’smyulster？”
　　“What’squeer？”saidtheMan’sWife。
　　“Ihavegotachilldownmybackjustasifagoosehadwalkedovermygrave。”
　　’Whydoyoulookatthething，then？”saidtheMm’sWife“Letusgo。”
　　TheTertiumQuidstoodattheheadofthegrave，andstaredwithoutansweringforaspaceThenhesaid，droppingapebbledown，“Itisnas’y~andcold；horriblycoldIdon’tthinkIshailcometotheCemeteryanymoreIdon’tthinkgrave-diggingischeerful。”
　　Thetwotalkedandagreedthatth~
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　　CemeterywasdepressingTheyalsoarrangedforaridenextdayoutfromtheCemeterythroughtheMashobraTunneluptoFagooandback，becausealltheworldwasgoingtoagarden-partyatViceregalLodge，andallthepeopleofMashobrawouldgotoo。
　　CorninguptheCemeteryroad，theTertiumQuid’shorsetriedtoboltu~hill，beingtiredwithstandingsolong，andmanagedtostrainahacksinew。
　　“Ishallhavetotakethemaretotriorrow。”saidtheTertiumQuid，“andshewillstandnothingheavierthanasnaffie。”
　　TheymadetheirarrangementstomeetintheCemetery，afterallowingalltheMashobrapeopletimetopassintoSimlaThatnightitrainedheavily，andnextday，whentheTertiumQuidcametothetrysting-place，hesawthatthenewgravehadafootofwaterinit，thegroundbeingatoughandsourclay。
　　“’Jove！Thatlooksbeastly。”saidtheTertiurnQuid“Fancybeingboardedupanddroppedintothatwell！”
　　TheythenstartedofftoFagoo，themareplayingwiththesnaffleandpickingherwayasthoughshewereshodwithsatin，andthesunshiningdivinelyTheroadbelowMashobratoFagooisofficiallystyledtheHimalayan-ThibetRoad；butinspiteofitsnameitisnotmuchmorethansixfeetwideinmostplaces，andthedropintothevalleybelowmustbeanythingbetweenoneandtwothousandfeet。
　　“Nowwe’regoingtoThibet。”saidtheMan’sWifemerrily，asthehorsesdrewneartoFagooShewasridingonthecliff-side。
　　“IntoThihet。”saidtheTertiumQuid，“eversofarfrompeoplewhosayhorridthings，andhubbieswhowritestupidlettersWithyou-totheendoftheworld！”
　　Acooliecarryingalogofwoodcameroundacorner，andthemarewentwidetoavoidhim-forefeetinandhaunchesout，asasensiblemareshouldgo。
　　“Totheworld’send。”saidtheMan’sWife，andlookedunspeakablethingsoverhernearshoulderattheTertiumQuid。
　　Hewassmiling，but，whileshelooked，thesmflefrozestiffasitwereonhisface，andchangedtoanervousgrin-thesortofgrinmenwearwhentheyarenotquiteeasyintheirsaddlesThemareseemedtobesinkingbythestem，andhernostrilscrackedwhileshewastryingtorealizewhatwashappeningTherainofthenightbeforehadrottedthedrop-sideoftheHimalayan-ThibetRoad，anditwasgivingwayunderhen“Whatareyoudoing？”saidtheMan’sWifeTheTertiumQuidgavenoanswenHegrinnednervouslyandsethisspursintothemare，whorappedwithherforefeetontheroad，andthestrugglebeganTheMan’sWifescreamed，“Oh，Frank，getoff！”
　　ButtheTertiumQuidwasgluedtothesaddle-hisfaceblueandwhite-andhelookedintotheMan’sWife’seyesThentheMan’sWifeclutchedatthemare’sheadandcaughtherbythenoseinsteadofthebridleThebrutethrewupherheadandwentdownwithascream，theTertiumQuiduponher，andthenervousgrinstillsetonhisface。
　　TheMan’sWifeheardthetinkle-tinMeoflittlestonesandlooseearthfallingofftheroadway，andtheslidingroarAWAYSIDECOMEDY
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　　ofthemanandhorsegoingdownTheneverythingwasquiet，andshecalledonFranktoleavehismareandwalkupButFrankdidnotanswerHewasunderneaththemare，ninehundredfeetbelow，spoilingapatchofIndiancorn。
　　AstherevellerscamehackfromViceregalLodgeinthemistsoftheevening，theymetatemporarilyinsanewoman，onatemporarilymadhorse，swingingroundthecorners，withhereyesandhermouthopen，andherheadliketheheadoftheMedusaShewasstoppedbyamanattheriskofhislife，andtakenoutofthesaddle，alimpheap，andputonthebanktoexplainherselfThiswastedtwentyminutes，andthenshewassenthomeinalady’s’rickshaw，stillwithhermouthopenandherhandspickingatherriding-gloves。
　　Shewasinbedthroughthefollowingthreedays，whichwererainy；soshemissedattendingthefuneraloftheTertiumQuid，whowasloweredintoeighteeninchesofwater，insteadofthetwelvetowhichhehadfirstobjected。
　　AWaysicteComedyBecausetoeverypurposethereistimeandjudgment，thereforethemiseryofmanisgreatuponhim——
　　Ecciesviii6。
　　FATEandtheGovernmentofIndiahaveturnedtheStationofKashimaintoaprison；and，becausethereisnohelpforthepoorsoulswhoarenowlyingthereintorment，Iwritethisstory，prayingthattheGovernmentofIndiamaybemovedtoscattertheEuropeanpopulationtothefourwinds。
　　Kashimaisboundonallsidesbytherock-tippedcircleoftheDosehrihillsInSpring，itisablazewithrosesinSummer，therosesdieandthehotwindsblowfromthehills；inAutumn，thewhitemistsfromtheihilscovertheplaceaswithwater，andinWinterthefrostsnipeverythingyoungandtendertoearth-levelThereisbutoneviewinKashima-astretchofperfectlyflatpastureandplough-land，runninguptothegrey-bluescruboftheDosebrihills。
　　Therearenoamusements，exceptsnipeandtigershooting；butthetigershavebeenlongsincehuntedfromtheirlairsintherock-caves，andthesnipeonlycomeonceayearNarkarra-onehundredandforty-threemilesbyroad-istheneareststationtoKashimaButKashimanevergoestoNarkarra，wherethereareatleasttwelveEnglishpeopleItstayswithinthecircleoftheDosebrihills。
　　AllKasbimaacquitsMrsVansuythenofanyintentiontodoharm；
　　butallKashimaknowsthatshe，andshealone，broughtabouttheirpain。
　　Boulte，theEngineer，MrsBoulte，andCaptainKurrellknowthis。
　　TheyaretheEnglishpopulationofKashima，ifweexceptMajorVansuythen，whoisofnoimportancewhatever，andMrsVansuythen，whoisthemostimportantofall。
　　Youmustremember，thoughyouwillnotunderstand，thatalllawsweaken200
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　　inasmallandhiddencommunitywherethereisnopublicopinion。
　　WhenamanisabsolutelyaloneinaStationherunsacertainriskoffallingintoevilways。
　　Theriskismultipliedbyeveryadditiontoth~populationuptotwelve-theJury-numberAfterthat，fearandconsequentrestraintbegin，andhumanactionbecomeslessgrotesquelyjerky。
　　TherewasdeeppeaceinKashimatillMrsVansuythenarrived。
　　Shewasacharmingwoman，everyonesaidsoeverywhere；andshecharmedeveryoneInspiteofthis，or，perhaps，becauseofthis，sinceFateissoperverse，shecaredonlyforoneman，andhewasMajorVansuythenHadshebeenplainorstupid，thismatterwouldhavebeenintelligibletoKashimaButshewasafairwoman，withverystillgreyeyes，thecolorofalakejustbeforethelightofthesuntouchesit。
　　Nomanwhohadseenthoseeyes，could，lateron，explainwhatfashionofwomanshewastolookuponTheeyesdazzledhimHerownsexsaidthatshewas“nothadlooking，butspoiledbypretendingtobesograve。”AndyethergravitywasnaturalItwasnotherhabittosmile。
　　Shemerelywentthroughlife，lookingatthosewhopassed；andthe~omenobjectedwhilethemenfelldownandworshipped。
　　SheknowsandisdeeplysorryfortheevilshehasdonetoKashima；butMajorVansuythencannotunderstandwhyMrsBoultedoesnotdropintoafternoonteaatleastthreetimesaweek。
　　“WhenthereareonlytwowomeninoneStation，theyoughttoseeagreatdealofeachother。”
　　saysMajorVansuythen。
　　LongandlongbeforeeverMrsVansuythencameoutofthosefar-awayplaceswherethereissocietyandamusement，KurrellhaddiscoveredthatMrsBoultewastheonewomanintheworldforhimand-youdarenotblamethemKashimawasasoutoftheworldasHeavenortheOtherPlace，andtheDosehrihillskepttheirsecretwell。
　　BoultehadnoconcerninthematterHewasincampforafortnightatatimeHewasahard，heavyman，andneitherMrs。
　　BoultenorKurrellpitiedhimTheyhadallKashimaandeachotherfortheirvery，veryown；
　　andKashimawastheGardenofEdeninthosedaysWhenBoultereturnedfromhiswanderingshewouldslapKurrellbetweentheshouldersandcallhim“oldfellow。”andthethreewoulddinetogetherKashimawashappythenwhenthejudgmentofGodseemedalmostasdistantasNarkarraortherailwaythatrandowntotheseaButtheGovernmentsentMajorVansuythentoKashima，andwithhimcamehiswife。
　　TheetiquetteofKashimaismuchthesameasthatofadesertislandWhenastrangeriscastawaythere，allhandsgodowntotheshoretomakehimwelcome。
　　KashimaassembledatthemasonryplatformclosetotheNarkarraRoad，andspreadteafortheVansuythcnsThatceremonywasreckonedaformalcall，andmadethemfreeoftheStation，itsrightsandprivilegesWhentheVansuythensweresettleddown，theygaveatinyhousewarmingtoallKashima；andthatmadeKashimafreeoftheirhouse，accordingtotheimmemorialusageoftheStation。
　　ThentheRainscame，whennooneAWAYSIDECOMEDY
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　　couldgointocamp，andtheNarkarraRoadwaswashedawaybytheKasunRiver，andinthecup-likepasturesofKashimathecattlewadedknee-deep。
　　ThecloudsdroppeddownfromtheDosehrihillsandcoveredeverything。
　　AttheendoftheRains，Boulte’smannertowardhiswifechangedandbecamedemonstrativelyaffectionateTheyhadbeenmarriedtwelveyears，andthechangestartledMrsBoulte，whohatedherhusbandwiththehateofawomanwhohasmetwithnothingbutkindnessfromhermate，and，intheteethofthiskindness，haddonehimagreatwrongMoreover，shehadherawntroubletofightwith-herwatch0keepoverherownproperty，KurrellFortwomonthstheRainshadhiddentheDosebrihillsandmanyotherthingsbesides；butwhentheylifted，theyshowedMrsBoultethathermanamongmen，herTed-forshecalledhimTedintheolddayswhenBoultewasoutofearshot-wasslippingthelinksoftheallegiance。
　　“TheVansuythenWomanhastakenhim。”MrsBoultesaidtoherself；andwhenBoultewasaway，weptoverherbelief，inthefaceoftheover-vehementblandishmentsofTedSorrowinKashimaisasfortunateasLove，becausethereisnothingtoweakenitsavetheflightofTime。
　　MrsBoultehadneverbreathedhersuspiciontoKurrellbecauseshewasnotcertain；andhernatureledhertobeverycertainbeforeshetookstepsinanydirectionThatiswhyshebehavedasshedid。
　　Boultecameintothehouseoneevening，andleanedagainstthedoor-postsofthedrawing-room，chewinghismoustacheMrsBoultewasputtingsomeflowersintoavaseThereisapretenceofcivilizationeveninKashima。
　　“Littlewoman。”saidBoulte，quietly，“doyoucareforme？”
　　“Immensely。”saidshe，withalaugh“Canyouask~？”
　　“ButI’mserious。”saidBoulte“Doyoucareforme？”
　　MrsBoultedroppedtheflowers，andturnedroundquickly“Doyouwantanhonestanswer？”