“Goodbusiness！There’snosuchathing！”saidtheGlasgowman。“Nobodymakesanythingbutthemissionaries——dashit！”
　　“Idon’tknow。”saidanother。“There’sagooddealinopium。”
　　“It’sagoodjobtostrikeatabooedpearl-island，say，aboutthefourthyear。”remarkedathird；“skimthewholelagoononthesly，andupstickandawaybeforetheFrenchgetwindofyou。”
　　“Apignokketofcoldisgood。”observedaGerman。
　　“There’ssomethinginwrecks，too。”saidHavens。“LookatthatmaninHonolulu，andtheshipthatwentashoreonWaikikiReef；itwasblowingakona，hard；andshebegantobreakupassoonasshetouched。Lloyd’sagenthadhersoldinsideanhour；andbeforedark，whenshewenttopiecesinearnest，themanthatboughtherhadfeatheredhisnest。Threemorehoursofdaylight，andhemighthaveretiredfrombusiness。Asitwas，hebuiltahouseonBeretaniaStreet，andcalleditfortheship。”
　　“Yes，there’ssomethinginwreckssometimes。”saidtheGlasgowvoice；“butnotoften。”
　　“Asageneralrule，there’sdeucedlittleinanything。”saidHavens。
　　“Well，Ibelievethat’saChristianfact。”criedtheother。“WhatIwantisasecret；getholdofarichmanbytherightplace，andmakehimsqueal。”
　　“Isupposeyouknowit’snotthoughttobetheticket。”returnedHavens。
　　“Idon’tcareforthat；it’sgoodenoughforme。”criedthemanfromGlasgow，stoutly。“Theonlydevilofitis，afellowcanneverfindasecretinaplaceliketheSouthSeas：onlyinLondonandParis。”
　　“M’Gibbon’sbeenreadingsomedime-novel，Isuppose。”saidoneclubman。
　　“He’sbeenreading_AuroraFloyd_。”remarkedanother。
　　“AndwhatifIhave？”criedM’Gibbon。“It’salltrue。Lookatthenewspapers！It’sjustyourconfoundedignorancethatsetsyousnickering。Itellyou，it’sasmuchatradeasunderwriting，andadashedsightmorehonest。”
　　ThesuddenacrimonyoftheseremarkscalledLoudonwhowasamanofpeacefromhisreserve。“It’srathersingular。”
　　saidhe，“butIseemtohavepractisedaboutallthesemeansoflivelihood。”
　　“Tityoueffervindanokket？”inquiredtheinarticulateGerman，eagerly。
　　“No。Ihavebeenmostkindsoffoolinmytime。”returnedLoudon，“butnotthegold-diggingvariety。Everymanhasasanespotsomewhere。”
　　“Well，then。”suggestedsomeone，“didyoueversmuggleopium？”
　　“Yes，Idid。”saidLoudon。
　　“Wastheremoneyinthat？”
　　“Alltheway。”respondedLoudon。
　　“Andperhapsyouboughtawreck？”askedanother。
　　“Yes，sir。”saidLoudon。
　　“Howdidthatpanout？”pursuedthequestioner。
　　“Well，minewasapeculiarkindofwreck。”repliedLoudon。“I
　　don’tknow，onthewhole，thatIcanrecommendthatbranchofindustry。”
　　“Didshebreakup？”askedsomeone。
　　“IguessitwasratherIthatbrokedown。”saysLoudon。“Headnotbigenough。”
　　“Evertrytheblackmail？”inquiredHavens。
　　“Simpleasyouseemesittinghere！”respondedDodd。
　　“Goodbusiness？”
　　“Well，I’mnotaluckyman，yousee。”returnedthestranger。“Itoughttohavebeengood。”
　　“Youhadasecret？”askedtheGlasgowman。
　　“AsbigastheStateofTexas。”
　　“Andtheothermanwasrich？”
　　“Hewasn’texactlyJayGould，butIguesshecouldbuytheseislandsifhewanted。”
　　“Why，whatwaswrong，then？Couldn’tyougethandsonhim？”
　　“Ittooktime，butIhadhimcorneredatlast；andthen——“
　　“Whatthen？”
　　“Thespeculationturnedbottomup。Ibecametheman’sbosomfriend。”
　　“Thedeuceyoudid！”
　　“Hecouldn’thavebeenparticular，youmean？”askedDoddpleasantly。“Well，no；he’samanofratherlargesympathies。”
　　“Ifyou’redonetalkingnonsense，Loudon。”saidHavens，“let’sbegettingtomyplacefordinner。”
　　Outside，thenightwasfulloftheroaringofthesurf。Scatteredlightsglowedinthegreenthicket。Nativewomencamebytwosandthreesoutofthedarkness，smiledandogledthetwowhites，perhapswooedthemwithastrainoflaughter，andwentbyagain，bequeathingtotheairaheadyperfumeofpalm-oilandfrangipaniblossom。FromtheclubtoMr。Havens’sresidencewasbutasteportwo，andtoanydwellerinEuropetheymusthaveseemedstepsinfairyland。Ifsuchanonecouldbuthavefollowedourtwofriendsintothewide-verandahedhouse，satdownwiththeminthecooltrellisedroom，wherethewineshoneonthelamp-lightedtablecloth；tastedoftheirexoticfood——therawfish，thebreadfruit，thecookedbananas，theroastpigservedwiththeinimitablemiti，andthatkingofdelicacies，palm-treesalad；seenandheardbyfitsandstarts，nowpeeringroundthecornerofthedoor，nowrailingwithinagainstinvisibleassistants，acertaincomelyyoungnativeladyinasacque，whoseemedtoomodesttobeamemberofthefamily，andtooimperioustobeless；andthenifsuchanonewerewhiskedagainthroughspacetoUpperTooting，orwhereverelsehehonoredthedomesticgods，“Ihavehadadream。”I
　　thinkhewouldsay，ashesatup，rubbinghiseyes，inthefamiliarchimney-cornerchair，“Ihavehadadreamofaplace，andIdeclareIbelieveitmustbeheaven。”ButtoDoddandhisentertainer，allthisamenityofthetropicnightandallthesedaintiesoftheislandtable，weregrownthingsofcustom；andtheyfelltomeatlikemenwhowerehungry，anddriftedintoidletalklikemenwhowereatriflebored。
　　Thesceneintheclubwasreferredto。
　　“Ineverheardyoutalksomuchnonsense，Loudon。”saidthehost。
　　“Well，itseemedtometherewassulphurintheair，soItalkedfortalking。”returnedtheother。“Butitwasnoneofitnonsense。”
　　“Doyoumeantosayitwastrue？”criedHavens，——“thatabouttheopiumandthewreck，andtheblackmailingandthemanwhobecameyourfriend？”
　　“Everylastwordofit。”saidLoudon。
　　“Youseemtohavebeenseeinglife。”returnedtheother。
　　“Yes，it’saqueeryarn。”saidhisfriend；“ifyouthinkyouwouldlike，I’lltellityou。”
　　HerefollowstheyarnofLoudonDodd，notashetoldittohisfriend，butashesubsequentlywroteit。
　　Thebeginningofthisyarnismypoorfather’scharacter。Thereneverwasabetterman，norahandsomer，norinmyviewamoreunhappy——unhappyinhisbusiness，inhispleasures，inhisplaceofresidence，andIamsorrytosayitinhisson。Hehadbegunlifeasaland-surveyor，soonbecameinterestedinrealestate，branchedoffintomanyotherspeculations，andhadthenameofoneofthesmartestmenintheStateofMuskegon。
　　“Doddhasabighead。”peopleusedtosay；butIwasneversosureofhiscapacity。Hisluck，atleast，wasbeyonddoubtforlong；hisassiduity，always。Hefoughtinthatdailybattleofmoney-grubbing，withakindofsad-eyedloyaltylikeamartyr’s；roseearly，atefast，camehomedispiritedandover-
　　eary，evenfromsuccess；grudgedhimselfallpleasure，ifhisnaturewascapableoftakingany，whichIsometimeswondered；andlaidout，uponsomedealinwheatorcornerinaluminium，theessenceofwhichwaslittlebetterthanhighwayrobbery，treasuresofconscientiousnessandself-denial。
　　Unluckily，Inevercaredacentforanythingbutart，andnevershall。Myideaofman’schiefendwastoenrichtheworldwiththingsofbeauty，andhaveafairlygoodtimemyselfwhiledoingso。IdonotthinkImentionedthatsecondpart，whichistheonlyoneIhavemanagedtocarryout；butmyfathermusthavesuspectedthesuppression，forhebrandedthewholeaffairasself-indulgence。
　　“Well。”Iremembercryingonce，“andwhatisyourlife？Youareonlytryingtogetmoney，andtogetitfromotherpeopleatthat。”
　　Hesighedbitterlywhichwasverymuchhishabit，andshookhispoorheadatme。“Ah，Loudon，Loudon！”saidhe，“youboysthinkyourselvesverysmart。But，struggleasyouplease，amanhastoworkinthisworld。Hemustbeanhonestmanorathief，Loudon。”
　　Youcanseeforyourselfhowvainitwastoarguewithmyfather。Thedespairthatseizeduponmeaftersuchaninterviewwas，besides，embitteredbyremorse；forIwasattimespetulant，butheinvariablygentle；andIwasfighting，afterall，formyownlibertyandpleasure，hesinglyforwhathethoughttobemygood。Andallthetimeheneverdespaired。“Thereisgoodstuffinyou，Loudon。”hewouldsay；“thereistherightstuffinyou。Bloodwilltell，andyouwillcomerightintime。I
　　amnotafraidmyboywilleverdisgraceme；Iamonlyvexedheshouldsometimestalknonsense。”Andthenhewouldpatmyshoulderormyhandwithakindofmotherlywayhehad，veryaffectinginamansostrongandbeautiful。
　　AssoonasIhadgraduatedfromthehighschool，hepackedmeofftotheMuskegonCommercialAcademy。Youareaforeigner，andyouwillhaveadifficultyinacceptingtherealityofthisseatofeducation。IassureyoubeforeIbeginthatIamwhollyserious。Theplacereallyexisted，possiblyexiststo-day：
　　wewereproudofitintheState，assomethingexceptionallynineteenthcenturyandcivilized；andmyfather，whenhesawmetothecars，nodoubtconsideredhewasputtingmeinastraightlineforthePresidencyandtheNewJerusalem。
　　“Loudon。”saidhe，“IamnowgivingyouachancethatJuliusCaesarcouldnothavegiventohisson——achancetoseelifeasitis，beforeyourownturncomestostartinearnest。Avoidrashspeculation，trytobehavelikeagentleman；andifyouwilltakemyadvice，confineyourselftoasafe，conservativebusinessinrailroads。Breadstuffsaretempting，butverydangerous；I
　　wouldnottrybreadstuffsatyourtimeoflife；butyoumayfeelyourwayalittleinothercommodities。Takeapridetokeepyourbooksposted，andneverthrowgoodmoneyafterbad。
　　There，mydearboy，kissmegood-by；andneverforgetthatyouareanonlychick，andthatyourdadwatchesyourcareerwithfondsuspense。”
　　Thecommercialcollegewasafine，roomyestablishment，pleasantlysituateamongwoods。Theairwashealthy，thefoodexcellent，thepremiumhigh。Electricwiresconnectedittousethewordsoftheprospectuswith“thevariousworldcentres。”
　　Thereading-roomwaswellsuppliedwith“commercialorgans。”ThetalkwasthatofWallStreet；andthepupilsfromfiftytoahundredladswereprincipallyengagedinrookingortryingtorookoneanotherfornominalsumsinwhatwascalled“collegepaper。”Wehadclasshours，indeed，inthemorning，whenwestudiedGerman，French，book-keeping，andthelikegoodlymatters；butthebulkofourdayandthegistoftheeducationcentredintheexchange，whereweweretaughttogambleinproduceandsecurities。Sincenotoneoftheparticipantspossessedabushelofwheatoradollar’sworthofstock，legitimatebusinesswasofcourseimpossiblefromthebeginning。Itwascold-drawngambling，withoutcolourordisguise。Justthatwhichistheimpedimentanddestructionofallgenuinecommercialenterprise，justthatweweretaughtwitheveryluxuryofstageeffect。Oursimulacrumofamarketwasruledbytherealmarketsoutside，sothatwemightexperiencethecourseandvicissitudeofprices。Wemustkeepbooks，andourledgerswereoverhauledatthemonth’sendbytheprincipalorhisassistants。Toaddaspiceofverisimilitude，“collegepaper“likepokerchipshadanactualmarketablevalue。Itwasboughtforeachpupilbyanxiousparentsandguardiansattherateofonecentforthedollar。Thesamepupil，whenhiseducationwascomplete，resold，atthesamefigure，somuchaswaslefthimtothecollege；andeveninthemidstofhiscurriculum，asuccessfuloperatorwouldsometimesrealizeaproportionofhisholding，andstandasupperontheslyintheneighbouringhamlet。Inshort，iftherewaseveraworseeducation，itmusthavebeeninthatacademywhereOlivermetCharlieBates。
　　WhenIwasfirstguidedintotheexchangetohavemydeskpointedoutbyoneoftheassistantteachers，Iwasoverwhelmedbytheclamourandconfusion。Certainblackboardsattheotherendofthebuildingwerecoveredwithfigurescontinuallyreplaced。Aseachnewsetappeared，thepupilsswayedtoandfro，androaredoutaloudwithaformidableandtomequitemeaninglessvociferation；leapingatthesametimeuponthedesksandbenches，signallingwitharmsandheads，andscribblingbrisklyinnote-books。IthoughtIhadneverbeheldascenemoredisagreeable；andwhenIconsideredthatthewholetrafficwasillusory，andallthemoneythenuponthemarketwouldscarcehavesufficedtobuyapairofskates，Iwasatfirstastonished，althoughnotforlong。Indeed，Ihadnosoonercalledtomindhowgrown-upmenandwomenofconsiderableestatewilllosetheirtemperabouthalf-pennypoints，thanmakinganimmediateallowanceformyfellow-studentsI
　　transferredthewholeofmyastonishmenttotheassistantteacher，who——poorgentleman——hadquiteforgottoshowmetomydesk，andstoodinthemidstofthishurly-burly，absorbedandseeminglytransported。
　　“Look，look。”heshoutedinmyear；“afallingmarket！Thebearshavehaditalltheirownwaysinceyesterday。”