Shewasnotabletofollowupherobservations,however,ortocometoanyconclusion,forbyoneofthoseaccidentswhichareliabletohappenatsea,thewholecourseoftheirliveswasnowputoutoforder。
  Evenatteathefloorrosebeneaththeirfeetandpitchedtoolowagain,andatdinnertheshipseemedtogroanandstrainasthoughalashweredescending。Shewhohadbeenabroad-backeddray-horse,uponwhosehind-quarterspierrotsmightwaltz,becameacoltinafield。Theplatesslantedawayfromtheknives,andMrs。Dalloway’sfaceblanchedforasecondasshehelpedherselfandsawthepotatoesrollthiswayandthat。Willoughby,ofcourse,extolledthevirtuesofhisship,andquotedwhathadbeensaidofherbyexpertsanddistinguishedpassengers,forhelovedhisownpossessions。Still,dinnerwasuneasy,anddirectlytheladieswerealoneClarissaownedthatshewouldbebetteroffinbed,andwent,smilingbravely。
  Nextmorningthestormwasonthem,andnopolitenesscouldignoreit。
  Mrs。Dallowaystayedinherroom。Richardfacedthreemeals,eatingvaliantlyateach;butatthethird,certainglazedasparagusswimminginoilfinallyconqueredhim。
  “Thatbeatsme,“hesaid,andwithdrew。
  “Nowwearealoneoncemore,“remarkedWilliamPepper,lookingroundthetable;butnoonewasreadytoengagehimintalk,andthemealendedinsilence。
  Onthefollowingdaytheymet——butasflyingleavesmeetintheair。
  Sicktheywerenot;butthewindpropelledthemhastilyintorooms,violentlydownstairs。Theypassedeachothergaspingondeck;theyshoutedacrosstables。Theyworefurcoats;andHelenwasneverseenwithoutabandannaonherhead。Forcomforttheyretreatedtotheircabins,wherewithtightlywedgedfeettheylettheshipbounceandtumble。
  Theirsensationswerethesensationsofpotatoesinasackonagallopinghorse。Theworldoutsidewasmerelyaviolentgreytumult。
  Fortwodaystheyhadaperfectrestfromtheiroldemotions。
  Rachelhadjustenoughconsciousnesstosupposeherselfadonkeyonthesummitofamoorinahail-storm,withitscoatblownintofurrows;
  thenshebecameawizenedtree,perpetuallydrivenbackbythesaltAtlanticgale。
  Helen,ontheotherhand,staggeredtoMrs。Dalloway’sdoor,knocked,couldnotbeheardfortheslammingofdoorsandthebatteringofwind,andentered。
  Therewerebasins,ofcourse。Mrs。Dallowaylayhalf-raisedonapillow,anddidnotopenhereyes。Thenshemurmured,“Oh,Dick,isthatyou?“
  Helenshouted——forshewasthrownagainstthewashstand——“Howareyou?“
  Clarissaopenedoneeye。Itgaveheranincrediblydissipatedappearance。
  “Awful!“shegasped。Herlipswerewhiteinside。
  Plantingherfeetwide,Helencontrivedtopourchampagneintoatumblerwithatooth-brushinit。
  “Champagne,“shesaid。
  “There’satooth-brushinit,“murmuredClarissa,andsmiled;
  itmighthavebeenthecontortionofoneweeping。Shedrank。
  “Disgusting,“shewhispered,indicatingthebasins。Relicsofhumourstillplayedoverherfacelikemoonshine。
  “Wantmore?“Helenshouted。SpeechwasagainbeyondClarissa’sreach。
  Thewindlaidtheshipshiveringonherside。PaleagoniescrossedMrs。Dallowayinwaves。Whenthecurtainsflapped,greylightspuffedacrossher。Betweenthespasmsofthestorm,Helenmadethecurtainfast,shookthepillows,stretchedthebed-clothes,andsmoothedthehotnostrilsandforeheadwithcoldscent。
  “You_are_good!“Clarissagasped。“Horridmess!“
  Shewastryingtoapologiseforwhiteunderclothesfallenandscatteredonthefloor。Foronesecondsheopenedasingleeye,andsawthattheroomwastidy。
  “That’snice,“shegasped。
  Helenlefther;far,farawaysheknewthatshefeltakindoflikingforMrs。Dalloway。Shecouldnothelprespectingherspiritandherdesire,eveninthethroesofsickness,foratidybedroom。
  Herpetticoats,however,roseaboveherknees。
  Quitesuddenlythestormrelaxeditsgrasp。Ithappenedattea;
  theexpectedparoxysmoftheblastgaveoutjustasitreacheditsclimaxanddwindledaway,andtheshipinsteadoftakingtheusualplungewentsteadily。Themonotonousorderofplungingandrising,roaringandrelaxing,wasinterferedwith,andeveryoneattablelookedupandfeltsomethingloosenwithinthem。
  Thestrainwasslackenedandhumanfeelingsbegantopeepagain,astheydowhendaylightshowsattheendofatunnel。
  “Tryaturnwithme,“RidleycalledacrosstoRachel。“
  “Foolish!“criedHelen,buttheywentstumblinguptheladder。
  Chokedbythewindtheirspiritsrosewitharush,forontheskirtsofallthegreytumultwasamistyspotofgold。Instantlytheworlddroppedintoshape;theywerenolongeratomsflyinginthevoid,butpeopleridingatriumphantshiponthebackofthesea。
  Windandspacewerebanished;theworldfloatedlikeanappleinatub,andthemindofman,whichhadbeenunmooredalso,oncemoreattacheditselftotheoldbeliefs。
  Havingscrambledtwiceroundtheshipandreceivedmanysoundcuffsfromthewind,theysawasailor’sfacepositivelyshinegolden。
  Theylooked,andbeheldacompleteyellowcircleofsun;nextminuteitwastraversedbysailingstandsofcloud,andthencompletelyhidden。
  Bybreakfastthenextmorning,however,theskywassweptclean,thewaves,althoughsteep,wereblue,andaftertheirviewofthestrangeunder-world,inhabitedbyphantoms,peoplebegantoliveamongtea-potsandloavesofbreadwithgreaterzestthanever。
  RichardandClarissa,however,stillremainedontheborderland。
  Shedidnotattempttositup;herhusbandstoodonhisfeet,contemplatedhiswaistcoatandtrousers,shookhishead,andthenlaydownagain。Theinsideofhisbrainwasstillrisingandfallingliketheseaonthestage。Atfouro’clockhewokefromsleepandsawthesunlightmakeavividangleacrosstheredplushcurtainsandthegreytweedtrousers。Theordinaryworldoutsideslidintohismind,andbythetimehewasdressedhewasanEnglishgentlemanagain。
  Hestoodbesidehiswife。Shepulledhimdowntoherbythelapelofhiscoat,kissedhim,andheldhimfastforaminute。
  “Goandgetabreathofair,Dick,“shesaid。“Youlookquitewashedout……Howniceyousmell!……Andbepolitetothatwoman。
  Shewassokindtome。“
  ThereuponMrs。Dallowayturnedtothecoolsideofherpillow,terriblyflattenedbutstillinvincible。
  RichardfoundHelentalkingtoherbrother-in-law,overtwodishesofyellowcakeandsmoothbreadandbutter。
  “Youlookveryill!“sheexclaimedonseeinghim。“Comeandhavesometea。“
  Heremarkedthatthehandsthatmovedaboutthecupswerebeautiful。
  “Ihearyou’vebeenverygoodtomywife,“hesaid。“She’shadanawfultimeofit。Youcameinandfedherwithchampagne。
  Wereyouamongthesavedyourself?“
  “I?Oh,Ihaven’tbeensickfortwentyyears——sea-sick,Imean。“
  “Therearethreestagesofconvalescence,Ialwayssay,“
  brokeintheheartyvoiceofWilloughby。“Themilkstage,thebread-and-butterstage,andtheroast-beefstage。Ishouldsayyouwereatthebread-and-butterstage。“Hehandedhimtheplate。
  “Now,Ishouldadviseaheartytea,thenabriskwalkondeck;
  andbydinner-timeyou’llbeclamouringforbeef,eh?“Hewentofflaughing,excusinghimselfonthescoreofbusiness。
  “Whatasplendidfellowheis!“saidRichard。“Alwayskeenonsomething。“
  “Yes,“saidHelen,“he’salwaysbeenlikethat。“
  “Thisisagreatundertakingofhis,“Richardcontinued。
  “It’sabusinessthatwon’tstopwithships,Ishouldsay。
  WeshallseehiminParliament,orI’mmuchmistaken。He’sthekindofmanwewantinParliament——themanwhohasdonethings。“
  ButHelenwasnotmuchinterestedinherbrother-in-law。
  “Iexpectyourhead’saching,isn’tit?“sheasked,pouringafreshcup。
  “Well,itis,“saidRichard。“It’shumiliatingtofindwhataslaveoneistoone’sbodyinthisworld。D’youknow,Icanneverworkwithoutakettleonthehob。AsoftenasnotIdon’tdrinktea,butImustfeelthatIcanifIwantto。“
  “That’sverybadforyou,“saidHelen。
  “Itshortensone’slife;butI’mafraid,Mrs。Ambrose,wepoliticiansmustmakeupourmindstothatattheoutset。We’vegottoburnthecandleatbothends,or——“
  “You’vecookedyourgoose!“saidHelenbrightly。
  “Wecan’tmakeyoutakeusseriously,Mrs。Ambrose,“heprotested。
  “MayIaskhowyou’vespentyourtime?Reading——philosophy?“Hesawtheblackbook。“Metaphysicsandfishing!“heexclaimed。“IfIhadtoliveagainIbelieveIshoulddevotemyselftooneortheother。“
  Hebeganturningthepages。
  “’Good,then,isindefinable,’“hereadout。“Howjollytothinkthat’sgoingonstill!’SofarasIknowthereisonlyoneethicalwriter,ProfessorHenrySidgwick,whohasclearlyrecognisedandstatedthisfact。’That’sjustthekindofthingweusedtotalkaboutwhenwewereboys。IcanrememberarguinguntilfiveinthemorningwithDuffy——nowSecretaryforIndia——pacingroundandroundthosecloistersuntilwedecideditwastoolatetogotobed,andwewentforarideinstead。Whetherweevercametoanyconclusion——
  that’sanothermatter。Still,it’sthearguingthatcounts。
  It’sthingslikethatthatstandoutinlife。Nothing’sbeenquitesovividsince。It’sthephilosophers,it’sthescholars,“
  hecontinued,“they’rethepeoplewhopassthetorch,whokeepthelightburningbywhichwelive。Beingapoliticiandoesn’tnecessarilyblindonetothat,Mrs。Ambrose。“
  “No。Whyshouldit?“saidHelen。“Butcanyourememberifyourwifetakessugar?“
  SheliftedthetrayandwentoffwithittoMrs。Dalloway。
  Richardtwistedamufflertwiceroundhisthroatandstruggledupondeck。Hisbody,whichhadgrownwhiteandtenderinadarkroom,tingledalloverinthefreshair。Hefelthimselfamanundoubtedlyintheprimeoflife。Prideglowedinhiseyeasheletthewindbuffethimandstoodfirm。Withhisheadslightlyloweredhesheeredroundcorners,strodeuphill,andmettheblast。Therewasacollision。Forasecondhecouldnotseewhatthebodywashehadruninto。“Sorry。““Sorry。“ItwasRachelwhoapologised。
  Theybothlaughed,toomuchblownabouttospeak。Shedroveopenthedoorofherroomandsteppedintoitscalm。Inordertospeaktoher,itwasnecessarythatRichardshouldfollow。Theystoodinawhirlpoolofwind;papersbeganflyingroundincircles,thedoorcrashedto,andtheytumbled,laughing,intochairs。
  RichardsatuponBach。
  “Myword!Whatatempest!“heexclaimed。
  “Fine,isn’tit?“saidRachel。Certainlythestruggleandwindhadgivenheradecisionshelacked;redwasinhercheeks,andherhairwasdown。
  “Oh,whatfun!“hecried。“WhatamIsittingon?Isthisyourroom?
  Howjolly!““There——sitthere,“shecommanded。Cowperslidoncemore。
  “Howjollytomeetagain,“saidRichard。“Itseemsanage。
  _Cowper’s__Letters>?……Bach?……_Wuthering__Heights_?……Isthiswhereyoumeditateontheworld,andthencomeoutandposepoorpoliticianswithquestions?Intheintervalsofsea-sicknessI’vethoughtalotofourtalk。Iassureyou,youmademethink。“
  “Imadeyouthink!Butwhy?“
  “Whatsolitaryicebergsweare,MissVinrace!Howlittlewecancommunicate!TherearelotsofthingsIshouldliketotellyouabout——tohearyouropinionof。HaveyoueverreadBurke?“
  “Burke?“sherepeated。“WhowasBurke?“
  “No?Well,thenIshallmakeapointofsendingyouacopy。
  _The__Speech__on__the__French__Revolution_——_The_
  _American__Rebellion_?Whichshallitbe,Iwonder?“Henotedsomethinginhispocket-book。“Andthenyoumustwriteandtellmewhatyouthinkofit。Thisreticence——thisisolation——that’swhat’sthematterwithmodernlife!Now,tellmeaboutyourself。
  Whatareyourinterestsandoccupations?Ishouldimaginethatyouwereapersonwithverystronginterests。Ofcourseyouare!
  GoodGod!WhenIthinkoftheagewelivein,withitsopportunitiesandpossibilities,themassofthingstobedoneandenjoyed——
  whyhaven’twetenlivesinsteadofone?Butaboutyourself?“
  “Yousee,I’mawoman,“saidRachel。
  “Iknow——Iknow,“saidRichard,throwinghisheadback,anddrawinghisfingersacrosshiseyes。
  “Howstrangetobeawoman!Ayoungandbeautifulwoman,“
  hecontinuedsententiously,“hasthewholeworldatherfeet。
  That’strue,MissVinrace。Youhaveaninestimablepower——forgoodorforevil。Whatcouldn’tyoudo——“hebrokeoff。
  “What?“askedRachel。
  “Youhavebeauty,“hesaid。Theshiplurched。Rachelfellslightlyforward。Richardtookherinhisarmsandkissedher。
  Holdinghertight,hekissedherpassionately,sothatshefeltthehardnessofhisbodyandtheroughnessofhischeekprinteduponhers。Shefellbackinherchair,withtremendousbeatsoftheheart,eachofwhichsentblackwavesacrosshereyes。