“Howsillythepooroldlightslook!“saidEvelynM。inacuriouslysubduedtoneofvoice。“Andourselves;itisn’tbecoming。“
Itwastrue;theuntidyhair,andthegreenandyellowgems,whichhadseemedsofestivehalfanhourago,nowlookedcheapandslovenly。
Thecomplexionsoftheelderladiessufferedterribly,and,asifconsciousthatacoldeyehadbeenturneduponthem,theybegantosaygood-nightandtomaketheirwayuptobed。
Rachel,thoughrobbedofheraudience,hadgoneonplayingtoherself。
FromJohnPeelshepassedtoBach,whowasatthistimethesubjectofherintenseenthusiasm,andonebyonesomeoftheyoungerdancerscameinfromthegardenandsatuponthedesertedgiltchairsroundthepiano,theroombeingnowsoclearthattheyturnedoutthelights。
Astheysatandlistened,theirnerveswerequieted;theheatandsorenessoftheirlips,theresultofincessanttalkingandlaughing,wassmoothedaway。Theysatverystillasiftheysawabuildingwithspacesandcolumnssucceedingeachotherrisingintheemptyspace。
Thentheybegantoseethemselvesandtheirlives,andthewholeofhumanlifeadvancingverynoblyunderthedirectionofthemusic。
Theyfeltthemselvesennobled,andwhenRachelstoppedplayingtheydesirednothingbutsleep。
Susanrose。“Ithinkthishasbeenthehappiestnightofmylife!“
sheexclaimed。“Idoadoremusic,“shesaid,asshethankedRachel。
“Itjustseemstosayallthethingsonecan’tsayoneself。“
Shegaveanervouslittlelaughandlookedfromonetoanotherwithgreatbenignity,asthoughshewouldliketosaysomethingbutcouldnotfindthewordsinwhichtoexpressit。“Everyone’sbeensokind——
soverykind,“shesaid。Thenshetoowenttobed。
Thepartyhavingendedintheveryabruptwayinwhichpartiesdoend,HelenandRachelstoodbythedoorwiththeircloakson,lookingforacarriage。
“Isupposeyourealisethattherearenocarriagesleft?“
saidSt。John,whohadbeenouttolook。“Youmustsleephere。“
“Oh,no,“saidHelen;“weshallwalk。“
“Maywecometoo?“Hewetasked。“Wecan’tgotobed。Imaginelyingamongbolstersandlookingatone’swashstandonamorninglikethis——
Isthatwhereyoulive?“Theyhadbeguntowalkdowntheavenue,andheturnedandpointedatthewhiteandgreenvillaonthehillside,whichseemedtohaveitseyesshut。
“That’snotalightburning,isit?“Helenaskedanxiously。
“It’sthesun,“saidSt。John。Theupperwindowshadeachaspotofgoldonthem。
“Iwasafraiditwasmyhusband,stillreadingGreek,“shesaid。
“Allthistimehe’sbeenediting_Pindar_。“
Theypassedthroughthetownandturnedupthesteeproad,whichwasperfectlyclear,thoughstillunborderedbyshadows。
Partlybecausetheyweretired,andpartlybecausetheearlylightsubduedthem,theyscarcelyspoke,butbreathedinthedeliciousfreshair,whichseemedtobelongtoadifferentstateoflifefromtheairatmidday。Whentheycametothehighyellowwall,wherethelaneturnedofffromtheroad,Helenwasfordismissingthetwoyoungmen。
“You’vecomefarenough,“shesaid。“Gobacktobed。“
Buttheyseemedunwillingtomove。
“Let’ssitdownamoment,“saidHewet。Hespreadhiscoatontheground。“Let’ssitdownandconsider。“Theysatdownandlookedoutoverthebay;itwasverystill,theseawasripplingfaintly,andlinesofgreenandbluewerebeginningtostripeit。Therewerenosailingboatsasyet,butasteamerwasanchoredinthebay,lookingveryghostlyinthemist;itgaveoneunearthlycry,andthenallwassilent。
Racheloccupiedherselfincollectingonegreystoneafteranotherandbuildingthemintoalittlecairn;shediditveryquietlyandcarefully。
“Andsoyou’vechangedyourviewoflife,Rachel?“saidHelen。
Racheladdedanotherstoneandyawned。“Idon’tremember,“shesaid,“Ifeellikeafishatthebottomofthesea。“Sheyawnedagain。
Noneofthesepeoplepossessedanypowertofrightenherouthereinthedawn,andshefeltperfectlyfamiliarevenwithMr。Hirst。
“Mybrain,onthecontrary,“saidHirst,“isinaconditionofabnormalactivity。“Hesatinhisfavouritepositionwithhisarmsbindinghislegstogetherandhischinrestingonthetopofhisknees。“Iseethrougheverything——absolutelyeverything。
Lifehasnomoremysteriesforme。“Hespokewithconviction,butdidnotappeartowishforananswer。Nearthoughtheysat,andfamiliarthoughtheyfelt,theyseemedmereshadowstoeachother。
“Andallthosepeopledowntheregoingtosleep,“Hewetbegandreamily,“thinkingsuchdifferentthings,——MissWarrington,Isuppose,isnowonherknees;theElliotsarealittlestartled,it’snotoften_they_getoutofbreath,andtheywanttogettosleepasquicklyaspossible;thenthere’sthepoorleanyoungmanwhodancedallnightwithEvelyn;he’sputtinghisflowerinwaterandaskinghimself,’Isthislove?’——andpooroldPerrott,Idaresay,can’tgettosleepatall,andisreadinghisfavouriteGreekbooktoconsolehimself——
andtheothers——no,Hirst,“hewoundup,“Idon’tfinditsimpleatall。“
“Ihaveakey,“saidHirstcryptically。Hischinwasstilluponhiskneesandhiseyesfixedinfrontofhim。
Asilencefollowed。ThenHelenroseandbadethemgood-night。
“But,“shesaid,“rememberthatyou’vegottocomeandseeus。“
Theywavedgood-nightandparted,butthetwoyoungmendidnotgobacktothehotel;theywentforawalk,duringwhichtheyscarcelyspoke,andnevermentionedthenamesofthetwowomen,whowere,toaconsiderableextent,thesubjectoftheirthoughts。
Theydidnotwishtosharetheirimpressions。Theyreturnedtothehotelintimeforbreakfast。
Thereweremanyroomsinthevilla,butoneroomwhichpossessedacharacterofitsownbecausethedoorwasalwaysshut,andnosoundofmusicorlaughterissuedfromit。Everyoneinthehousewasvaguelyconsciousthatsomethingwentonbehindthatdoor,andwithoutintheleastknowingwhatitwas,wereinfluencedintheirownthoughtsbytheknowledgethatifthepasseditthedoorwouldbeshut,andiftheymadeanoiseMr。Ambroseinsidewouldbedisturbed。Certainactsthereforepossessedmerit,andotherswerebad,sothatlifebecamemoreharmoniousandlessdisconnectedthanitwouldhavebeenhadMr。Ambrosegivenupediting_Pindar_,andtakentoanomadexistence,inandoutofeveryroominthehouse。
Asitwas,everyonewasconsciousthatbyobservingcertainrules,suchaspunctualityandquiet,bycookingwell,andperformingothersmallduties,oneodeafteranotherwassatisfactorilyrestoredtotheworld,andtheysharedthecontinuityofthescholar’slife。
Unfortunately,asageputsonebarrierbetweenhumanbeings,andlearninganother,andsexathird,Mr。Ambroseinhisstudywassomethousandmilesdistantfromthenearesthumanbeing,whointhishouseholdwasinevitablyawoman。Hesathourafterhouramongwhite-leavedbooks,alonelikeanidolinanemptychurch,stillexceptforthepassageofhishandfromonesideofthesheettoanother,silentsaveforanoccasionalchoke,whichdrovehimtoextendhispipeamomentintheair。Asheworkedhiswayfurtherandfurtherintotheheartofthepoet,hischairbecamemoreandmoredeeplyencircledbybooks,whichlayopenonthefloor,andcouldonlybecrossedbyacarefulprocessofstepping,sodelicatethathisvisitorsgenerallystoppedandaddressedhimfromtheoutskirts。
Onthemorningafterthedance,however,Rachelcameintoheruncle’sroomandhailedhimtwice,“UncleRidley,“beforehepaidheranyattention。
Atlengthhelookedoverhisspectacles。
“Well?“heasked。
“Iwantabook,“shereplied。“Gibbon’s_History__of__the_
_Roman__Empire_。MayIhaveit?“
Shewatchedthelinesonheruncle’sfacegraduallyrearrangethemselvesatherquestion。Ithadbeensmoothasamaskbeforeshespoke。
“Pleasesaythatagain,“saidheruncle,eitherbecausehehadnotheardorbecausehehadnotunderstood。
Sherepeatedthesamewordsandreddenedslightlyasshedidso。
“Gibbon!Whatonearthd’youwanthimfor?“heenquired。
“Somebodyadvisedmetoreadit,“Rachelstammered。
“ButIdon’ttravelaboutwithamiscellaneouscollectionofeighteenth-centuryhistorians!“heruncleexclaimed。
“Gibbon!Tenbigvolumesatleast。“
Rachelsaidthatshewassorrytointerrupt,andwasturningtogo。
“Stop!“criedheruncle。Heputdownhispipe,placedhisbookononeside,androseandledherslowlyroundtheroom,holdingherbythearm。
“Plato,“hesaid,layingonefingeronthefirstofarowofsmalldarkbooks,“andJorrocksnextdoor,whichiswrong。Sophocles,Swift。
Youdon’tcareforGermancommentators,Ipresume。French,then。
YoureadFrench?YoushouldreadBalzac。ThenwecometoWordsworthandColeridge,Pope,Johnson,Addison,Wordsworth,Shelley,Keats。
Onethingleadstoanother。WhyisMarlowehere?Mrs。Chailey,Ipresume。Butwhat’stheuseofreadingifyoudon’treadGreek?
Afterall,ifyoureadGreek,youneedneverreadanythingelse,purewasteoftime——purewasteoftime,“thusspeakinghalftohimself,withquickmovementsofhishands;theyhadcomeroundagaintothecircleofbooksonthefloor,andtheirprogresswasstopped。
“Well,“hedemanded,“whichshallitbe?“
“Balzac,“saidRachel,“orhaveyouthe_Speech__on__the_
_American__Revolution_,UncleRidley?“
“_The__Speech__on__the__American__Revolution_?“heasked。
Helookedatherverykeenlyagain。“Anotheryoungmanatthedance?“
“No。ThatwasMr。Dalloway,“sheconfessed。
“GoodLord!“heflungbackhisheadinrecollectionofMr。Dalloway。
Shechoseforherselfavolumeatrandom,submittedittoheruncle,who,seeingthatitwas_La__Cousine__bette_,badeherthrowitawayifshefoundittoohorrible,andwasabouttoleavehimwhenhedemandedwhethershehadenjoyedherdance?
Hethenwantedtoknowwhatpeopledidatdances,seeingthathehadonlybeentoonethirty-fiveyearsago,whennothinghadseemedtohimmoremeaninglessandidiotic。Didtheyenjoyturningroundandroundtothescreechofafiddle?Didtheytalk,andsayprettythings,andifso,whydidn’ttheydoit,underreasonableconditions?
Asforhimself——hesighedandpointedatthesignsofindustrylyingallabouthim,which,inspiteofhissigh,filledhisfacewithsuchsatisfactionthathisniecethoughtgoodtoleave。
Onbestowingakissshewasallowedtogo,butnotuntilshehadboundherselftolearnatanyratetheGreekalphabet,andtoreturnherFrenchnovelwhendonewith,uponwhichsomethingmoresuitablewouldbefoundforher。
Astheroomsinwhichpeopleliveareapttogiveoffsomethingofthesameshockastheirfaceswhenseenforthefirsttime,Rachelwalkedveryslowlydownstairs,lostinwonderatheruncle,andhisbooks,andhisneglectofdances,andhisqueer,utterlyinexplicable,butapparentlysatisfactoryviewoflife,whenhereyewascaughtbyanotewithhernameonitlyinginthehall。
Theaddresswaswritteninasmallstronghandunknowntoher,andthenote,whichhadnobeginning,ran:——
IsendthefirstvolumeofGibbonasIpromised。PersonallyIfindlittletobesaidforthemoderns,butI’mgoingtosendyouWedekindwhenI’vedonehim。Donne?HaveyoureadWebsterandallthatset?
Ienvyyoureadingthemforthefirsttime。Completelyexhaustedafterlastnight。Andyou?
TheflourishofinitialswhichshetooktobeSt。J。A。H。,wounduptheletter。ShewasverymuchflatteredthatMr。Hirstshouldhaverememberedher,andfulfilledhispromisesoquickly。
Therewasstillanhourtoluncheon,andwithGibboninonehand,andBalzacintheothershestrolledoutofthegateanddownthelittlepathofbeatenmudbetweentheolivetreesontheslopeofthehill。Itwastoohotforclimbinghills,butalongthevalleythereweretreesandagrasspathrunningbytheriverbed。