ThereforeImadealowbow,andwent;indoubtastowhichhadtherightofit。
Butthoughhehadsofardismissedme,Iwasnotyetquitefreetogo,inasmuchasIhadnotmoneyenoughtotakemeallthewaytoOare,unlessindeedIshouldgoafoot,andbegmysustenancebytheway,whichseemedtobebelowme。ThereforeIgotmyfewclothespacked,andmyfewdebtspaid,allreadytostartinhalfanhour,ifonlytheywouldgivemeenoughtosetoutupontheroadwith。ForIdoubtednot,beingyoungandstrong,thatIcouldwalkfromLondontoOareintendaysorintwelveatmost,whichwasnotmuchlongerthanhorse-work;onlyIhadbeenafool,asyouwillsaywhenyouhearit。ForafterreceivingfromMasterSpanktheamountofthebillwhichIhaddelivered——lessindeedbyfiftyshillingsthanthemoneymymotherhadgivenme,forIhadspentfiftyshillings,andmore,inseeingthetownandtreatingpeople,whichIcouldnotchargetoHisMajesty——Ihadfirstpaidallmydebtsthereout,whichwerenotverymany,andthensupposingmyselftobeanestablishedcreditoroftheTreasuryformycomingneeds,andalreadyscentingthecountryair,andforeseeingthejoyofmymother,whathadIdonebutspenthalfmybalance,ayandmorethanthree-quartersofit,uponpresentsformother,andAnnie,andLizzie,JohnFry,andhiswife,andBettyMuxworthy,BillDadds,JimSlocombe,and,inaword,halfoftherestofthepeopleatOare,includingalltheSnowefamily,whomusthavethingsgoodandhandsome?AndifImustwhileIamaboutit,hidenothingfromthosewhoreadme,IhadactuallyboughtforLornaathingthepriceofwhichquitefrightenedme,tilltheshopkeepersaiditwasnothingatall,andthatnoyoungman,withaladytolovehim,coulddaretoofferherrubbish,suchastheJewsoldacrosstheway。NowthemereideaofbeautifulLornaeverlovingme,whichhetalkedaboutaspatlythoughofcourseInevermentionedherasifitwereasettledthing,andheknewallaboutit,thatmereideasodrovemeabroad,thatifhehadaskedthreetimesasmuch,Icouldneverhavecountedthemoney。
NowinallthisIwasafoolofcourse——notforrememberingmyfriendsandneighbours,whichamanhasarighttodo,andindeedisboundtodo,whenhecomesfromLondon——butfornotbeingcertifiedfirstwhatcashIhadtogoonwith。Andtomygreatamazement,whenIwentwithanotherbillforthevictualsofonlythreedaysmore,andaweek’sexpenseonthehomewardroadreckonedverynarrowly,MasterSpanknotonlyrefusedtograntmeanyinterview,butsentmeoutapieceofbluepaper,lookinglikeabutcher’sticket,andbearingthesewordsandnomore,’JohnRidd,gotothedevil。Hewhowillnotwhenhemay,whenhewill,heshallhavenay。’FromthisIconcludedthatIhadlostfavourinthesightofChiefJusticeJeffreys。
Perhapsbecausemyevidencehadnotprovedofanyvalue!perhapsbecausehemeanttoletthematterlie,tillcastonhim。
Anyhow,itwasareasonofmuchgrief,andsomeangertome,andverygreatanxiety,disappointment,andsuspense。Forherewasthetimeofthehaygonepast,andtheharvestofsmallcorncomingon,andthetroutnowrisingattheyellowSally,andtheblackbirdseatingourwhite-heartcherriesIwassure,thoughI
couldnotseethem,andwhowastodoanygoodformother,orstopherfromweepingcontinually?Andmorethanthis,whatwasbecomeofLorna?Perhapsshehadcastmeawayaltogether,asaflouterandachangeling;
perhapsshehaddrownedherselfintheblackwell;
perhapsandthatwasworstofallshewasevenmarried,childasshewas,tothatvileCarverDoone,iftheDoonesevercaredaboutmarrying!ThatlastthoughtsentmedownatoncetowatchforMr。Spankagain,resolvedthatifIcouldcatchhim,spankhimI
wouldtoaprettygoodtune,althoughsixteeninfamily。
However,therewasnosuchthingastofindhim;andtheushervowedhavingordersIdoubtthathewasgonetotheseaforthegoodofhishealth,havingsadlyoverworkedhimself;andthatnonebutapoordevillikehimself,whoneverhadhandlingofmoney,wouldstayinLondonthisfoul,hotweather;whichwaslikelytobringtheplaguewithit。Herewasanothernewterrorforme,whohadheardoftheplaguesofLondon,andthehorriblethingsthathappened;andsogoingbacktomylodgingsatonce,Iopenedmyclothesandsoughtforspots,especiallyasbeingsolongatahairyfellmonger’s;butfindingnone,IfelldownandthankedGodforthatsame,andvowedtostartforOareto-morrow,withmycarbineloaded,comewealcomewoe,comesuncomeshower;thoughalltheparishshouldlaughatme,forbeggingmywayhomeagain,afterthebravethingssaidofmygoing,asifIhadbeentheKing’scousin。
ButIwassavedinsomedegreefromthisloweringofmypride,andwhatmatteredmore,ofmother’s;forgoingtobuywithmylastcrown-pieceafteralldemandswerepaidalittleshotandpowder,moreneedfulontheroadalmostthanevenshoesorvictuals,atthecornerofthestreetImetmygoodfriendJeremyStickles,newlycomeinsearchofme。Itookhimbacktomylittleroom——mineatleasttillto-morrowmorning——andtoldhimallmystory,andhowmuchIfeltaggrievedbyit。Buthesurprisedmeverymuch,byshowingnosurpriseatall。
’Itisthewayoftheworld,Jack。Theyhavegottenalltheycanfromthee,andwhyshouldtheyfeedtheefurther?Wefeednotadeadpig,Itrow,butbastehimwellwithbrineandrue。Nay,wedonotvictualhimuponthedayofkilling;whichtheyhavedonetothee。
Thouartaluckyman,John;thouhastgottenoneday’swages,oratanyratehalfaday,afterthyworkwasrendered。Godhavemercyonme,John!ThethingsI
seearemanifold;andsoismyregardofthem。Whatusetoinsistonthis,ormakeaspecialpointofthat,orholdbysomethingsaidofold,whenadifferentmoodwason?Itellthee,Jack,allmenareliars;andheistheleastonewhopressesnottoohardonthemforlying。’
Thiswasallquitedarktome,forIneverlookedatthingslikethat,andneverwouldownmyselfaliar,notatleasttootherpeople,noreventomyself,althoughImighttoGodsometimes,whentroublewasuponme。Andifitcomestothat,nomanhasanyrighttobecalleda’liar’forsmoothingoverthingsunwitting,throughdutytohisneighbour。
’Fivepoundsthoushalthave,Jack,’saidJeremySticklessuddenly,whileIwasallabroadwithmyselfastobeingaliarornot;’fivepounds,andIwilltakemychanceofwringingitfromthatgreatrogueSpank。TenIwouldhavemadeit,John,butforbadlucklately。Putbackyourbitsofpaper,lad;Iwillhavenoacknowledgment。JohnRidd,nononsensewithme!’
ForIwasreadytokisshishand,tothinkthatanymaninLondonthemeanestandmostsuspiciousplace,uponallGod’searthshouldtrustmewithfivepounds,withoutevenareceiptforit!ItovercamemesothatIsobbed;for,afterall,thoughbiginbody,Iambutachildatheart。Itwasnotthefivepoundsthatmovedme,butthewayofgivingit;andaftersomuchbittertalk,thegreattrustinmygoodness。
Itwasthebeginningofwheat-harvest,whenIcametoDunstertown,havingwalkedallthewayfromLondon,andbeingsomewhatfootsore。Forthoughfivepoundswasenoughtokeepmeinfoodandlodgingupontheroad,andleavememanyashillingtogivetofarpoorertravellers,itwouldhavebeennothingforhorse-hire,asIknewtoowellbythepricesJeremyStickleshadpaiduponourwaytoLondon。NowIneversawaprettiertownthanDunsterlookedthatevening;
forsoothtosay,Ihadalmostlostallhopeofreachingitthatnight,althoughthecastlewaslonginview。Butbeingoncethere,mytroublesweregone,atleastasregardedwayfaring;formother’scousin,theworthytannerwithwhomwehadsleptonthewaytoLondon,wasinsuchindignationattheplightinwhichIcamebacktohim,afoot,andweary,andalmostshoeless——nottospeakofupperthings——thathesworethen,bythemercyofGod,thatiftheschemesabrewingroundhim,againstthosebloodyPapists,shouldcometoanyheadorshape,andshowgoodchanceofsucceeding,hewouldriskathousandpounds,asthoughitwereapenny。
Itoldhimnottodoit,becauseIhadheardotherwise,butwasnotatlibertytotellone-tenthofwhatI
knew,andindeedhadseeninLondontown。Butofthishetooknoheed,becauseIonlynoddedathim;andhecouldnotmakeitout。Forittakesanoldman,oratleastamiddle-agedone,tonodandwink,withanypoweronthebrainsofothermen。However,IthinkI
madehimknowthatthebadstateinwhichIcametohistown,andthegreatshameIhadwroughtforhimamongthefolkroundthecard-tableattheLuttrellArms,wasnottobe,eventhere,attributedtoKingCharlestheSecond,noreventohiscounsellors,buttomyownspeedoftravelling,whichhadbeatpost-horses。Forbeingmuchdistraughtinmind,anddesperateinbody,I
hadmadeallthewayfromLondontoDunsterinsixdays,andnomore。Itmaybeonehundredandseventymiles,Icannottelltoafurlongortwo,especiallyasIlostmywaymorethanadozentimes;butatanyratethereinsixdaysIwas,andmostkindlytheyreceivedme。Thetannerhadsomeexcellentdaughters,Iforgethowmany;veryprettydamsels,andwellsetup,andabletomakegoodpastry。Butthoughtheyaskedmemanyquestions,andmadeasortoflordofme,andofferedtodarnmystockingswhichintruthrequiredit,Ifellasleepinthemidstofthem,althoughI
wouldnotacknowledgeit;andtheysaid,’Poorcousin!
heisweary’,andledmetoablessedbed,andkissedmeallroundlikeswan’sdown。
InthemorningalltheExmoorhills,thethoughtofwhichhadfrightenedmeattheendofeachday’stravel,seemednomorethanbushelstome,asIlookedforththebedroomwindow,andthankedGodforthesightofthem。Andevenso,Ihadnottoclimbthem,atleastbymyownlabour。Formymostworthyuncleasweoftcallaparent’scousin,findingitimpossibletokeepmefortheday,andowningindeedthatIwasrightinhasteningtomymother,vowedthatwalkI
shouldnot,eventhoughhelosthisSaturdayhidesfromMineheadandfromWatchett。Accordinglyhesentmeforthontheverystrongestnaghehad,andthemaidenscametowishmeGod-speed,andkissedtheirhandsatthedoorway。Itmademeproudandgladtothinkthatafterseeingsomuchoftheworld,andhavingheldmyownwithit,Iwascomeoncemoreamongmyownpeople,andfoundthemkinder,andmorewarm-hearted,ayandbetterlookingtoo,thanalmostanyIhadhappeneduponinthemightycityofLondon。
ButhowshallItellyouthethingsIfelt,andtheswellingofmyheartwithinme,asIdrewnearer,andmorenear,totheplaceofallIlovedandowned,tothehauntofeverywarmremembrance,thenestofallthefledglinghopes——inaword,tohome?ThefirstsheepIbeheldonthemoorwithagreatredJ。R。onhissideformotherwouldhavethemmarkedwithmyname,insteadofherownastheyshouldhavebeen,I
doassureyoumyspiritleaped,andallmysightcametomyeyes。Ishoutedout,’Jem,boy!’——forthatwashisname,andararehandhewasatfighting——andheknewmeinspiteofthestrangerhorse;andIleanedoverandstrokedhishead,andsworeheshouldneverbemutton。AndwhenIwaspassedhesetoffatfullgallop,tocalltherestoftheJ。R。’stogether,andtellthemyoungmasterwascomehomeatlast。
Butblessyourheart,andmyownaswell,itwouldtakemealltheafternoontolaybeforeyouone-tenthofthethingswhichcamehometomeinthatonehalf-hour,asthesunwassinking,intherealwayheoughttosink。
Itouchedmyhorsewithnospurnorwhip,feelingthatmyslowwitswouldgo,ifthesightscametoofastoverthem。Herewasthepoolwherewewashedthesheep,andtherewasthehollowthatoozedaway,whereIhadshotthreewildducks。Herewasthepeat-rickthathidmydinner,whenIcouldnotgohomeforit,andtherewasthebushwiththethymegrowingroundit,whereAnniehadfoundagreatswarmofourbees。Andnowwasthecornerofthedrystonewall,wherethemoorgaveoverinearnest,andthepartridgeswhiskedfromitintothecornlands,andcalledthattheirsupperwasready,andlookedatourhouseandthericksastheyran,andwouldwaitforthatcomforttillwinter。
AndthereIsaw——butletmego——Anniewastoomuchforme。Shenearlypulledmeoffmyhorse,andkissedtheverymouthofthecarbine。
“Iknewyouwouldcome。OhJohn!OhJohn!IhavewaitedhereeverySaturdaynight;andIsawyouforthelastmileormore,butIwouldnotcomeroundthecorner,forfearthatIshouldcry,John,andthennotcrywhenIgotyou。NowImaycryasmuchasIlike,andyouneednottrytostopme,John,becauseIamsohappy。Butyoumustn’tcryyourself,John;whatwillmotherthinkofyou?Shewillbesojealousofme。’