Inthemusicclass,intheballadsshesang,therewasnothingbutlittleangelswithgoldenwings,madonnas,lagunes,gondoliers;-mildcompositionsthatallowedhertocatchaglimpseathwarttheobscurityofstyleandtheweaknessofthemusicoftheattractivephantasmagoriaofsentimentalrealities。Someofhercompanionsbrought“keepsakes“giventhemasnewyear’sgiftstotheconvent。Thesehadtobehidden;itwasquiteanundertaking;theywerereadinthedormitory。Delicatelyhandlingthebeautifulsatinbindings,Emmalookedwithdazzledeyesatthenamesoftheunknownauthors,whohadsignedtheirversesforthemostpartascountsorviscounts。
Shetrembledassheblewbackthetissuepaperovertheengravingandsawitfoldedintwoandfallgentlyagainstthepage。Herebehindthebalustradeofabalconywasayoungmaninashortcloak,holdinginhisarmsayounggirlinawhitedresswearinganalms-bagatherbelt;ortherewerenamelessportraitsofEnglishladieswithfaircurls,wholookedatyoufromundertheirroundstrawhatswiththeirlargecleareyes。Sometherewereloungingintheircarriages,glidingthroughparks,agreyhoundboundingalonginfrontoftheequipagedrivenatatrotbytwomidgetpostilionsinwhitebreeches。Others,dreamingonsofaswithanopenletter,gazedatthemoonthroughaslightlyopenwindowhalfdrapedbyablackcurtain。Thenaiveones,atearontheircheeks,werekissingdovesthroughthebarsofaGothiccage,or,smiling,theirheadsononeside,werepluckingtheleavesofamargueritewiththeirtaperfingers,thatcurvedatthetipslikepeakedshoes。Andyou,too,werethere,SultanswithlongpipesrecliningbeneatharboursinthearmsofBayaderes;Djiaours,Turkishsabres,Greekcaps;andyouespecially,palelandscapesofdithyrambiclands,thatoftenshowusatoncepalmtreesandfirs,tigersontheright,aliontotheleft,Tartarminaretsonthehorizon;thewholeframedbyaveryneatvirginforest,andwithagreatperpendicularsunbeamtremblinginthewater,where,standingoutinrelieflikewhiteexcoriationsonasteel-greyground,swansareswimmingabout。
AndtheshadeoftheargandlampfastenedtothewallaboveEmma’sheadlightedupallthesepicturesoftheworld,thatpassedbeforeheronebyoneinthesilenceofthedormitory,andtothedistantnoiseofsomebelatedcarriagerollingovertheBoulevards。
Whenhermotherdiedshecriedmuchthefirstfewdays。Shehadafuneralpicturemadewiththehairofthedeceased,and,inalettersenttotheBertauxfullofsadreflectionsonlife,sheaskedtobeburiedlateroninthesamegrave。Thegoodmanthoughtshemustbeill,andcametoseeher。Emmawassecretlypleasedthatshehadreachedatafirstattempttherareidealofpalelives,neverattainedbymediocrehearts。SheletherselfglidealongwithLamartinemeanderings,listenedtoharpsonlakes,toallthesongsofdyingswans,tothefallingoftheleaves,thepurevirginsascendingtoheaven,andthevoiceoftheEternaldiscoursingdownthevalleys。Sheweariedofit,wouldnotconfessit,continuedfromhabit,andatlastwassurprisedtofeelherselfsoothed,andwithnomoresadnessatheartthanwrinklesonherbrow。
Thegoodnuns,whohadbeensosureofhervocation,perceivedwithgreatastonishmentthatMademoiselleRouaultseemedtobeslippingfromthem。Theyhadindeedbeensolavishtoherofprayers,retreats,novenas,andsermons,theyhadsooftenpreachedtherespectduetosaintsandmartyrs,andgivensomuchgoodadviceastothemodestyofthebodyandthesalvationofhersoul,thatshedidastightlyreinedhorses;shepulledupshortandthebitslippedfromherteeth。Thisnature,positiveinthemidstofitsenthusiasms,thathadlovedthechurchforthesakeoftheflowers,andmusicforthewordsofthesongs,andliteratureforitspassionalstimulus,rebelledagainstthemysteriesoffaithasitgrewirritatedbydiscipline,athingantipathetictoherconstitution。Whenherfathertookherfromschool,noonewassorrytoseehergo。TheLadySuperioreventhoughtthatshehadlatterlybeensomewhatirreverenttothecommunity。
Emma,athomeoncemore,firsttookpleasureinlookingaftertheservants,thengrewdisgustedwiththecountryandmissedherconvent。WhenCharlescametotheBertauxforthefirsttime,shethoughtherselfquitedisillusioned,withnothingmoretolearn,andnothingmoretofeel。
Buttheuneasinessofhernewposition,orperhapsthedisturbancecausedbythepresenceofthisman,hadsufficedtomakeherbelievethatsheatlastfeltthatwondrouspassionwhich,tillthen,likeagreatbirdwithrose-colouredwings,hunginthesplendouroftheskiesofpoesy;andnowshecouldnotthinkthatthecalminwhichshelivedwasthehappinessshehaddreamed。
ChapterSevenShethought,sometimes,that,afterall,thiswasthehappiesttimeofherlife——thehoneymoon,aspeoplecalledit。Totastethefullsweetnessofit,itwouldhavebeennecessarydoubtlesstoflytothoselandswithsonorousnameswherethedaysaftermarriagearefulloflazinessmostsuave。Inpostchaisesbehindbluesilkencurtainstorideslowlyupsteeproad,listeningtothesongofthepostilionre-echoedbythemountains,alongwiththebellsofgoatsandthemuffledsoundofawaterfall;atsunsetontheshoresofgulfstobreatheintheperfumeoflemontrees;thenintheeveningonthevilla-terracesabove,handinhandtolookatthestars,makingplansforthefuture。Itseemedtoherthatcertainplacesonearthmustbringhappiness,asaplantpeculiartothesoil,andthatcannotthriveelsewhere。WhycouldnotsheleanoverbalconiesinSwisschalets,orenshrinehermelancholyinaScotchcottage,withahusbanddressedinablackvelvetcoatwithlongtails,andthinshoes,apointedhatandfrills?Perhapsshewouldhavelikedtoconfideallthesethingstosomeone。Buthowtellanundefinableuneasiness,variableastheclouds,unstableasthewinds?Wordsfailedher——theopportunity,thecourage。
IfCharleshadbutwishedit,ifhehadguessedit,ifhislookhadbutoncemetherthought,itseemedtoherthatasuddenplentywouldhavegoneoutfromherheart,asthefruitfallsfromatreewhenshakenbyahand。Butastheintimacyoftheirlifebecamedeeper,thegreaterbecamethegulfthatseparatedherfromhim。
Charles’sconversationwascommonplaceasastreetpavement,andeveryone’sideastroopedthroughitintheireverydaygarb,withoutexcitingemotion,laughter,orthought。Hehadneverhadthecuriosity,hesaid,whilehelivedatRouen,togotothetheatretoseetheactorsfromParis。Hecouldneitherswim,norfence,norshoot,andonedayhecouldnotexplainsometermofhorsemanshiptoherthatshehadcomeacrossinanovel。
Aman,onthecontrary,shouldhenotknoweverything,excelinmanifoldactivities,initiateyouintotheenergiesofpassion,therefinementsoflife,allmysteries?Butthisonetaughtnothing,knewnothing,wishednothing。Hethoughtherhappy;andsheresentedthiseasycalm,thissereneheaviness,theveryhappinessshegavehim。
Sometimesshewoulddraw;anditwasgreatamusementtoCharlestostandthereboltuprightandwatchherbendoverhercardboard,witheyeshalf-closedthebettertoseeherwork,orrolling,betweenherfingers,littlebread-pellets。Astothepiano,themorequicklyherfingersglidedoveritthemorehewondered。Shestruckthenoteswithaplomb,andranfromtoptobottomofthekeyboardwithoutabreak。Thusshakenup,theoldinstrument,whosestringsbuzzed,couldbeheardattheotherendofthevillagewhenthewindowwasopen,andoftenthebailiff’sclerk,passingalongthehighroadbare-headedandinlistslippers,stoppedtolisten,hissheetofpaperinhishand。
Emma,ontheotherhand,knewhowtolookafterherhouse。Shesentthepatients’accountsinwell-phrasedlettersthathadnosuggestionofabill。WhentheyhadaneighbourtodinneronSundays,shemanagedtohavesometastydish——pileduppyramidsofgreengagesonvineleaves,serveduppreservesturnedoutintoplates——andevenspokeofbuyingfinger-glassesfordessert。FromallthismuchconsiderationwasextendedtoBovary。
Charlesfinishedbyrisinginhisownesteemforpossessingsuchawife。Heshowedwithprideinthesittingroomtwosmallpencilsketchedbyherthathehadhadframedinverylargeframes,andhungupagainstthewallpaperbylonggreencords。Peoplereturningfrommasssawhimathisdoorinhiswool-workslippers。
Hecamehomelate——atteno’clock,atmidnightsometimes。Thenheaskedforsomethingtoeat,andastheservanthadgonetobed,Emmawaitedonhim。Hetookoffhiscoattodinemoreathisease。Hetoldher,oneaftertheother,thepeoplehehadmet,thevillageswherehehadbeen,theprescriptionshahadwritten,and,wellpleasedwithhimself,hefinishedtheremainderoftheboiledbeefandonions,pickedpiecesoffthecheese,munchedanapple,emptiedhiswater-bottle,andthenwenttobed,andlayonhisbackandsnored。
Ashehadbeenforatimeaccustomedtowearnightcaps,hishandkerchiefwouldnotkeepdownoverhisears,sothathishairinthemorningwasalltumbledpell-mellabouthisfaceandwhitenedwiththefeathersofthepillow,whosestringscameuntiedduringthenight。Healwaysworethickbootsthathadtwolongcreasesovertheinsteprunningobliquelytowardstheankle,whiletherestoftheuppercontinuedinastraightlineasifstretchedonawoodenfoot。Hesaidthat“wasquitegoodenoughforthecountry。“
Hismotherapprovedofhiseconomy,forshecametoseehimasformerlywhentherehadbeensomeviolentrowatherplace;andyetMadameBovaryseniorseemedprejudicedagainstherdaughter-in-law。Shethought“herwaystoofinefortheirposition“;thewood,thesugar,andthecandlesdisappearedas“atagrandestablishment,“andtheamountoffiringinthekitchenwouldhavebeenenoughfortwenty-fivecourses。Sheputherlineninorderforherinthepresses,andtaughthertokeepaneyeonthebutcherwhenhebroughtthemeat。Emmaputupwiththeselessons。MadameBovarywaslavishofthem;andthewords“daughter“and“mother“wereexchangedalldaylong,accompaniedbylittlequiveringsofthelips,eachoneutteringgentlewordsinavoicetremblingwithanger。
InMadameDubuc’stimetheoldwomanfeltthatshewasstillthefavorite;butnowtheloveofCharlesforEmmaseemedtoheradesertionfromhertenderness,anencroachmentuponwhatwashers,andshewatchedherson’shappinessinsadsilence,asaruinedmanlooksthroughthewindowsatpeopledininginhisoldhouse。Sherecalledtohimasremembranceshertroublesandhersacrifices,and,comparingthesewithEmma’snegligence,cametotheconclusionthatitwasnotreasonabletoadorehersoexclusively。
Charlesknewnotwhattoanswer:herespectedhismother,andhelovedhiswifeinfinitely;heconsideredthejudgmentoftheoneinfallible,andyethethoughttheconductoftheotherirreproachable。WhenMadamBovaryhadgone,hetriedtimidlyandinthesametermstohazardoneortwoofthemoreanodyneobservationshehadheardfromhismamma。Emmaprovedtohimwithawordthathewasmistaken,andsenthimofftohispatients。
Andyet,inaccordwiththeoriesshebelievedright,shewantedtomakeherselfinlovewithhim。Bymoonlightinthegardensherecitedallthepassionaterhymessheknewbyheart,and,sighing,sangtohimmanymelancholyadagios;butshefoundherselfascalmafterasbefore,andCharlesseemednomoreamorousandnomoremoved。
Whenshehadthusforawhilestrucktheflintonherheartwithoutgettingaspark,incapable,moreover,ofunderstandingwhatshedidnotexperienceasofbelievinganythingthatdidnotpresentitselfinconventionalforms,shepersuadedherselfwithoutdifficultythatCharles’spassionwasnothingveryexorbitant。Hisoutburstsbecameregular;heembracedheratcertainfixedtimes。Itwasonehabitamongotherhabits,and,likeadessert,lookedforwardtoafterthemonotonyofdinner。