`Asamatteroffact，’saidtheleanandfreckledTommyDukes，wholookedmuchmoreIrishthanMay，whowaspaleandratherfat：`Asamatteroffact，Hammond，youhaveastrongpropertyinstinct，andastrongwilltoself-assertion，andyouwantsuccess。SinceI’vebeeninthearmydefinitely，I’vegotoutofthewayoftheworld，andnowIseehowinordinatelystrongthecravingforself-assertionandsuccessisinmen。Itisenormouslyoverdeveloped。Allourindividualityhasrunthatway。Andofcoursemenlikeyouthinkyou’llgetthroughbetterwithawoman’sbacking。That’swhyyou’resojealous。That’swhatsexistoyou……avitallittledynamobetweenyouandJulia，tobringsuccess。Ifyoubegantobeunsuccessfulyou’dbegintoflirt，likeCharlie，whoisn’tsuccessful。MarriedpeoplelikeyouandJuliahavelabelsonyou，liketravellers’trunks。JuliaislabelledMrsArnoldB。Hammond——justlikeatrunkontherailwaythatbelongstosomebody。AndyouarelabelledArnoldB。Hammond，c/oMrsArnoldB。Hammond。Oh，you’requiteright，you’requiteright!
　　Thelifeofthemindneedsacomfortablehouseanddecentcooking。You’requiteright。Itevenneedsposterity。Butitallhingesontheinstinctforsuccess。Thatisthepivotonwhichallthingsturn。’
　　Hammondlookedratherpiqued。Hewasratherproudoftheintegrityofhismind，andofhisnotbeingatime-server。Nonetheless，hedidwantsuccess。
　　`It’squitetrue，youcan’tlivewithoutcash，’saidMay。`You’vegottohaveacertainamountofittobeabletoliveandgetalong……eventobefreetothinkyoumusthaveacertainamountofmoney，oryourstomachstopsyou。Butitseemstomeyoumightleavethelabelsoffsex。We’refreetotalktoanybody；sowhyshouldn’twebefreetomakelovetoanywomanwhoinclinesusthatway？’
　　`TherespeaksthelasciviousCelt，’saidClifford。
　　`Lascivious!well，whynot——？Ican’tseeIdoawomananymoreharmbysleepingwithherthanbydancingwithher……oreventalkingtoherabouttheweather。It’sjustaninterchangeofsensationsinsteadofideas，sowhynot？’
　　`Beaspromiscuousastherabbits!’saidHammond。
　　`Whynot？What’swrongwithrabbits？Aretheyanyworsethananeurotic，revolutionaryhumanity，fullofnervoushate？’
　　`Butwe’renotrabbits，evenso，’saidHammond。
　　`Precisely!Ihavemymind：Ihavecertaincalculationstomakeincertainastronomicalmattersthatconcernmealmostmorethanlifeordeath。Sometimesindigestioninterfereswithme。Hungerwouldinterferewithmedisastrously。
　　Inthesamewaystarvedsexinterfereswithme。Whatthen？’
　　`Ishouldhavethoughtsexualindigestionfromsurfeitwouldhaveinterferedwithyoumoreseriously，’saidHammondsatirically。
　　`Notit!Idon’tover-eatmyselfandIdon’tover-fuckmyself。Onehasachoiceabouteatingtoomuch。Butyouwouldabsolutelystarveme。’
　　`Notatall!Youcanmarry。’
　　`HowdoyouknowIcan？Itmaynotsuittheprocessofmymind。Marriagemight……andwould……stultifymymentalprocesses。I’mnotproperlypivotedthatway……andsomustIbechainedinakennellikeamonk？Allrotandfunk，myboy。Imustliveanddomycalculations。Ineedwomensometimes。
　　Irefusetomakeamountainofit，andIrefuseanybody’smoralcondemnationorprohibition。I’dbeashamedtoseeawomanwalkingaroundwithmyname-labelonher，addressandrailwaystation，likeawardrobetrunk。’
　　ThesetwomenhadnotforgiveneachotherabouttheJuliaflirtation。
　　`It’sanamusingidea，Charlie，’saidDukes，`thatsexisjustanotherformoftalk，whereyouactthewordsinsteadofsayingthem。Isupposeit’squitetrue。Isupposewemightexchangeasmanysensationsandemotionswithwomenaswedoideasabouttheweather，andsoon。Sexmightbeasortofnormalphysicalconversationbetweenamanandawoman。Youdon’ttalktoawomanunlessyouhaveideasincommon：thatisyoudon’ttalkwithanyinterest。Andinthesameway，unlessyouhadsomeemotionorsympathyincommonwithawomanyouwouldn’tsleepwithher。Butifyouhad……’
　　`Ifyouhavethepropersortofemotionorsympathywithawoman，yououghttosleepwithher，’saidMay。`It’stheonlydecentthing，togotobedwithher。Justas，whenyouareinterestedtalkingtosomeone，theOnlydecentthingistohavethetalkout。Youdon’tprudishlyputyourtonguebetweenyourteethandbiteit。Youjustsayoutyoursay。
　　Andthesametheotherway。’
　　`No，’saidHammond。`It’swrong。You，forexample，May，yousquanderhalfyourforcewithwomen。You’llneverreallydowhatyoushoulddo，withafinemindsuchasyours。Toomuchofitgoestheotherway。’
　　`Maybeitdoes……andtoolittleofyougoesthatway，Hammond，myboy，marriedornot。Youcankeepthepurityandintegrityofyourmind，butit’sgoingdamneddry。Yourpuremindisgoingasdryasfiddlesticks，fromwhatIseeofit。You’resimplytalkingitdown。’
　　TommyDukesburstintoalaugh。
　　`Goit，youtwominds!’hesaid。`Lookatme……Idon’tdoanyhighandpurementalwork，nothingbutjotdownafewideas。AndyetIneithermarrynorrunafterwomen。IthinkCharlie’squiteright；ifhewantstorunafterthewomen，he’squitefreenottoruntoooften。ButIwouldn’tprohibithimfromrunning。AsforHammond，he’sgotapropertyinstinct，sonaturallythestraightroadandthenarrowgatearerightforhim。You’llseehe’llbeanEnglishManofLettersbeforehe’sdone。A。B。C。fromtoptotoe。
　　Thenthere’sme。I’mnothing。Justasquib。Andwhataboutyou，Clifford？
　　Doyouthinksexisadynamotohelpamanontosuccessintheworld？’
　　Cliffordrarelytalkedmuchatthesetimes。Heneverheldforth；hisideaswerereallynotvitalenoughforit，hewastooconfusedandemotional。
　　Nowheblushedandlookeduncomfortable。
　　`Well!’hesaid，`beingmyselfhorsdecombat，Idon’tseeI’veanythingtosayonthematter。’
　　`Notatall，’saidDukes；`thetopofyou’sbynomeanshorsdecombat。You’vegotthelifeofthemindsoundandintact。Soletushearyourideas。’
　　`Well，’stammeredClifford，`eventhenIdon’tsupposeIhavemuchidea……I
　　supposemarry-and-have-done-with-itwouldprettywellstandforwhatI
　　think。Thoughofcoursebetweenamanandwomanwhocareforoneanother，itisagreatthing。’
　　`Whatsortofgreatthing？’saidTommy。
　　`Oh……itperfectstheintimacy，’saidClifford，uneasyasawomaninsuchtalk。
　　`Well，CharlieandIbelievethatsexisasortofcommunicationlikespeech。Letanywomanstartasexconversationwithme，andit’snaturalformetogotobedwithhertofinishit，allindueseason。Unfortunatelynowomanmakesanyparticularstartwithme，soIgotobedbymyself；
　　andamnonetheworseforit……Ihopeso，anyway，forhowshouldIknow？
　　AnyhowI’venostarrycalculationstobeinterferedwith，andnoimmortalworkstowrite。I’mmerelyafellowskulkinginthearmy……’
　　Silencefell。Thefourmensmoked。AndConniesatthereandputanotherstitchinhersewing……Yes，shesatthere!Shehadtositmum。Shehadtobequietasamouse，nottointerferewiththeimmenselyimportantspeculationsofthesehighly-mentalgentlemen。Butshehadtobethere。Theydidn’tgetonsowellwithouther；theirideasdidn’tflowsofreely。Cliffordwasmuchmorehedgyandnervous，hegotcoldfeetmuchquickerinConnie’sabsence，andthetalkdidn’trun。TommyDukescameoffbest；hewasalittleinspiredbyherpresence。Hammondshedidn’treallylike；heseemedsoselfishinamentalway。AndCharlesMay，thoughshelikedsomethingabouthim，seemedalittledistastefulandmessy，inspiteofhisstars。
　　HowmanyeveningshadConniesatandlistenedtothemanifestationsofthesefourmen!these，andoneortwoothers。Thattheyneverseemedtogetanywheredidn’ttroubleherdeeply。Shelikedtohearwhattheyhadtosay，especiallywhenTommywasthere。Itwasfun。Insteadofmenkissingyou，andtouchingyouwiththeirbodies，theyrevealedtheirmindstoyou。Itwasgreatfun!Butwhatcoldminds!
　　Andalsoitwasalittleirritating。ShehadmorerespectforMichaelis，onwhosenametheyallpouredsuchwitheringcontempt，asalittlemongrelarriviste，anduneducatedbounderoftheworstsort。Mongrelandbounderornot，hejumpedtohisownconclusions。Hedidn’tmerelywalkroundthemwithmillionsofwords，intheparadeofthelifeofthemind。
　　Conniequitelikedthelifeofthemind，andgotagreatthrilloutofit。Butshedidthinkitoverdiditselfalittle。Shelovedbeingthere，amidstthetobaccosmokeofthosefamouseveningsofthecronies，asshecalledthemprivatelytoherself。Shewasinfinitelyamused，andproudtoo，thateventheirtalkingtheycouldnotdo，withouthersilentpresence。
　　Shehadanimmenserespectforthought……andthesemen，atleast，triedtothinkhonestly。Butsomehowtherewasacat，anditwouldn’tjump。Theyallaliketalkedatsomething，thoughwhatitwas，forthelifeofhershecouldn’tsay。ItwassomethingthatMickdidn’tclear，either。
　　ButthenMickwasn’ttryingtodoanything，butjustgetthroughhislife，andputasmuchacrossotherpeopleastheytriedtoputacrosshim。
　　Hewasreallyanti-social，whichwaswhatCliffordandhiscronieshadagainsthim。Cliffordandhiscronieswerenotanti-social；theyweremoreorlessbentonsavingmankind，oroninstructingit，tosaytheleast。
　　TherewasagorgeoustalkonSundayevening，whentheconversationdriftedagaintolove。
　　`BlestbethetiethatbindsOurheartsinkindredsomething-or-other’——
　　saidTommyDukes。`I’dliketoknowwhatthetieis……Thetiethatbindsusjustnowismentalfrictionononeanother。And，apartfromthat，there’sdamnedlittletiebetweenus。Webustapart，andsayspitefulthingsaboutoneanother，likealltheotherdamnedintellectualsintheworld。Damnedeverybodies，asfarasthatgoes，fortheyalldoit。Elsewebustapart，andcoverupthespitefulthingswefeelagainstoneanotherbysayingfalsesugaries。It’sacuriousthingthatthementallifeseemstoflourishwithitsrootsinspite，ineffableandfathomlessspite。Alwayshasbeenso!LookatSocrates，inPlato，andhisbunchroundhim!Thesheerspiteofitall，justsheerjoyinpullingsomebodyelsetobits……Protagoras，orwhoeveritwas!AndAlcibiades，andalltheotherlittlediscipledogsjoininginthefray!ImustsayitmakesonepreferBuddha，quietlysittingunderabo-tree，orJesus，tellinghisdiscipleslittleSundaystories，peacefully，andwithoutanymentalfireworks。No，there’ssomethingwrongwiththementallife，radically。It’srootedinspiteandenvy，envyandspite。Yeshallknowthetreebyitsfruit。’
　　`Idon’tthinkwe’realtogethersospiteful，’protestedClifford。
　　`MydearClifford，thinkofthewaywetalkeachotherover，allofus。I’mratherworsethananybodyelse，myself。BecauseIinfinitelypreferthespontaneousspitetotheconcoctedsugaries；nowtheyarepoison；
　　whenIbeginsayingwhatafinefellowCliffordis，etc。，etc。，thenpoorCliffordistobepitied。ForGod’ssake，allofyou，sayspitefulthingsaboutme，thenIshallknowImeansomethingtoyou。Don’tsaysugaries，orI’mdone。’
　　`Oh，butIdothinkwehonestlylikeoneanother，’saidHammond。
　　`Itellyouwemust……wesaysuchspitefulthingstooneanother，aboutoneanother，behindourbacks!I’mtheworst。’
　　`AndIdothinkyouconfusethementallifewiththecriticalactivity。
　　Iagreewithyou，Socratesgavethecriticalactivityagrandstart，buthedidmorethanthat，’saidCharlieMay，rathermagisterially。Thecronieshadsuchacuriouspomposityundertheirassumedmodesty。Itwasallsoexcathedra，anditallpretendedtobesohumble。
　　DukesrefusedtobedrawnaboutSocrates。
　　`That’squitetrue，criticismandknowledgearenotthesamething，’
　　saidHammond。
　　`Theyaren’t，ofcourse，’chimedinBerry，abrown，shyyoungman，whohadcalledtoseeDukes，andwasstayingthenight。
　　Theyalllookedathimasiftheasshadspoken。
　　`Iwasn’ttalkingaboutknowledge……Iwastalkingaboutthementallife，’
　　laughedDukes。`Realknowledgecomesoutofthewholecorpusoftheconsciousness；
　　outofyourbellyandyourpenisasmuchasoutofyourbrainandmind。
　　Themindcanonlyanalyseandrationalize。Setthemindandthereasontocockitovertherest，andalltheycandoistocriticize，andmakeadeadness。Isayalltheycando。Itisvastlyimportant。MyGod，theworldneedscriticizingtoday……criticizingtodeath。Thereforelet’slivethementallife，andgloryinourspite，andstriptherottenoldshow。But，mindyou，it’slikethis：whileyouliveyourlife，youareinsomewayanOrganicwholewithalllife。Butonceyoustartthementallifeyouplucktheapple。You’veseveredtheconnexionbetween，theappleandthetree：theorganicconnexion。Andifyou’vegotnothinginyourlifebutthementallife，thenyouyourselfareapluckedapple……you’vefallenoffthetree。Andthenitisalogicalnecessitytobespiteful，justasit’sanaturalnecessityforapluckedappletogobad。’
　　Cliffordmadebigeyes：itwasallstufftohim。Conniesecretlylaughedtoherself。
　　`Wellthenwe’reallpluckedapples，’saidHammond，ratheracidlyandpetulantly。
　　`Solet’smakeciderofourselves，’saidCharlie。
　　`ButwhatdoyouthinkofBolshevism？’putinthebrownBerry，asifeverythinghadleduptoit。
　　`Bravo!’roaredCharlie。`WhatdoyouthinkofBolshevism？’
　　`Comeon!Let’smakehayofBolshevism!’saidDukes。
　　`I’mafraidBolshevismisalargequestion，’saidHammond，shakinghisheadseriously。
　　`Bolshevism，itseemstome，’saidCharlie，`isjustasuperlativehatredofthethingtheycallthebourgeois；andwhatthebourgeoisis，isn’tquitedefined。ItisCapitalism，amongotherthings。Feelingsandemotionsarealsosodecidedlybourgeoisthatyouhavetoinventamanwithoutthem。
　　`Thentheindividual，especiallythepersonalman，isbourgeois：
　　sohemustbesuppressed。Youmustsubmergeyourselvesinthegreaterthing，theSoviet-socialthing。Evenanorganismisbourgeois：sotheidealmustbemechanical。Theonlythingthatisaunit，non-organic，composedofmanydifferent，yetequallyessentialparts，isthemachine。Eachmanamachine-part，andthedrivingpowerofthemachine，hate……hateofthebourgeois。That，tome，isBolshevism。’
　　`Absolutely!’saidTommy。`Butalso，itseemstomeaperfectdescriptionofthewholeoftheindustrialideal。It’sthefactory-owner’sidealinanut-shell；exceptthathewoulddenythatthedrivingpowerwashate。
　　Hateitis，allthesame；hateoflifeitself。JustlookattheseMidlands，ifitisn’tplainlywrittenup……butit’sallpartofthelifeofthemind，it’salogicaldevelopment。’
　　`IdenythatBolshevismislogical，itrejectsthemajorpartofthepremisses，’saidHammond。
　　`Mydearman，itallowsthematerialpremiss；sodoesthepuremind……exclusively。’
　　`AtleastBolshevismhasgotdowntorockbottom，’saidCharlie。
　　`Rockbottom!Thebottomthathasnobottom!TheBolshevistswillhavethefinestarmyintheworldinaveryshorttime，withthefinestmechanicalequipment。
　　`Butthisthingcan’tgoon……thishatebusiness。Theremustbeareaction……’
　　saidHammond。