Primitivehabits-Rosy-faceddamsel-Apleasantmoment-Suitofblack-Thefurtiveglance-Themightyround-Degeneratetimes-
　　Thenewspaper-Theevilchance-Icongratulateyou。
　　’YOUNGgentleman，’saidthehugefatlandlord，’youarecomeattherighttime；dinnerwillbetakenupinafewminutes，andsuchadinner，’hecontinued，rubbinghishands，’asyouwillnotseeeverydayinthesetimes。’
　　’Iamhotanddusty，’saidI，’andshouldwishtocoolmyhandsandface。’
　　’Jenny!’saidthehugelandlord，withtheutmostgravity，’showthegentlemanintonumberseven，thathemaywashhishandsandface。’
　　’Bynomeans，’saidI，’Iamapersonofprimitivehabits，andthereisnothinglikethepumpinweatherlikethis。’
　　’Jenny，’saidthelandlord，withthesamegravityasbefore，’gowiththeyounggentlemantothepumpinthebackkitchen，andtakeacleantowelalongwithyou。’
　　Thereupontherosy-facedclean-lookingdamselwenttoadrawer，andproducingalarge，thick，butsnowywhitetowel，shenoddedtometofollowher；whereuponIfollowedJennythroughalongpassageintothebackkitchen。
　　Andattheendofthebackkitchentherestoodapump；andgoingtoitIplacedmyhandsbeneaththespout，andsaid，’Pump，Jenny’；
　　andJennyincontinently，withoutlayingdownthetowel，pumpedwithonehand，andIwashedandcooledmyheatedhands。
　　And，whenmyhandswerewashedandcooled，Itookoffmyneckcloth，and，unbuttoningmyshirtcollar，Iplacedmyheadbeneaththespoutofthepump，andIsaiduntoJenny，’Now，Jenny，laydownthetowel，andpumpforyourlife。’
　　ThereuponJenny，placingthetowelonalinen-horse，tookthehandleofthepumpwithbothhandsandpumpedovermyheadashandmaidhadneverpumpedbefore；sothatthewaterpouredintorrentsfrommyhead，myface，andmyhairdownuponthebrickfloor。
　　And，afterthelapseofsomewhatmorethanaminute，Icalledoutwithahalf-strangledvoice，’Hold，Jenny!’andJennydesisted。I
　　stoodforafewmomentstorecovermybreath，thentakingthetowelwhichJennyproffered，Idriedcomposedlymyhandsandhead，myfaceandhair；then，returningthetoweltoJenny，Igaveadeepsighandsaid，’Surelythisisoneofthepleasantmomentsoflife。’
　　Then，havingsetmydresstorights，andcombedmyhairwithapocketcomb，IfollowedJenny，whoconductedmebackthroughthelongpassage，andshowedmeintoaneatsandedparlourontheground-floor。
　　Isatdownbyawindowwhichlookedoutuponthedustystreet；
　　presentlyincamethehandmaid，andcommencedlayingthetable-
　　cloth。’ShallIspreadthetableforone，sir，’saidshe，’ordoyouexpectanybodytodinewithyou？’’Ican’tsaythatIexpectanybody，’saidI，laughinginwardlytomyself；’however，ifyoupleaseyoucanlayfortwo，sothatifanyacquaintanceofmineshouldchancetostepin，hemayfindaknifeandforkreadyforhim。’
　　SoIsatbythewindow，sometimeslookingoutuponthedustystreet，andnowglancingatcertainold-fashionedprintswhichadornedthewalloveragainstme。Ifellintoakindofdoze，fromwhichIwasalmostinstantlyawakenedbytheopeningofthedoor。
　　Dinner，thoughtI；andIsatuprightinmychair。No；amanofthemiddleage，andratherabovethemiddleheight，dressedinaplainsuitofblack，madehisappearance，andsatdowninachairatsomedistancefromme，butneartothetable，andappearedtobelostinthought。
　　’Theweatherisverywarm，sir，’saidI。
　　’Very，’saidthestranger，laconically，lookingatmeforthefirsttime。
　　’Wouldyouliketoseethenewspaper？’saidI，takinguponewhichlayuponthewindowseat。
　　’Ineverreadnewspapers，’saidthestranger，’nor，indeed，-’
　　Whateveritmightbethathehadintendedtosayheleftunfinished。Suddenlyhewalkedtothemantelpieceatthefartherendoftheroom，beforewhichheplacedhimselfwithhisbacktowardsme。Thereheremainedmotionlessforsometime；atlength，raisinghishand，hetouchedthecornerofthemantelpiecewithhisfinger，advancedtowardsthechairwhichhehadleft，andagainseatedhimself。
　　’Haveyoucomefar？’saidhe，suddenlylookingtowardsme，andspeakinginafrankandopenmanner，whichdenotedawishtoenterintoconversation。’Youdonotseemtobeofthisplace。’
　　’Icomefromsomedistance，’saidI；’indeed，Iamwalkingforexercise，whichIfindasnecessarytothemindasthebody。I
　　believethatbyexercisepeoplewouldescapemuchmentalmisery。’
　　ScarcelyhadIutteredthesewordswhenthestrangerlaidhishand，withseemingcarelessness，uponthetable，nearoneoftheglasses；
　　afteramomentortwohetouchedtheglasswithhisfingerasifinadvertently，then，glancingfurtivelyatme，hewithdrewhishandandlookedtowardsthewindow。
　　’Areyoufromtheseparts？’saidIatlast，withapparentcarelessness。
　　’Fromthisvicinity，’repliedthestranger。’Youthink，then，thatitisaseasytowalkoffthebadhumoursofthemindasofthebody？’
　　’I，atleast，amwalkinginthathope，’saidI。
　　’Iwishyoumaybesuccessful，’saidthestranger；andherehetouchedoneoftheforkswhichlayonthetablenearhim。
　　Herethedoor，whichwasslightlyajar，wassuddenlypushedopenwithsomefracas，andincamethestoutlandlord，supportingwithsomedifficultyanimmensedish，inwhichwasamightyroundmassofsmokingmeatgarnishedallroundwithvegetables；sohighwasthemassthatitprobablyobstructedhisview，foritwasnotuntilhehadplacedituponthetablethatheappearedtoobservethestranger；healmoststarted，andquiteoutofbreathexclaimed，’Godblessme，yourhonour；isyourhonourtheacquaintancethattheyounggentlemanwasexpecting？’
　　’Istheyounggentlemanexpectinganacquaintance？’saidthestranger。
　　Thereisnothinglikeputtingagoodfaceuponthesematters，thoughtItomyself；and，gettingup，Ibowedtotheunknown。
　　’Sir，’saidI，’whenItoldJennythatshemightlaythetable-
　　clothfortwo，sothatintheeventofanyacquaintancedroppinginhemightfindaknifeandforkreadyforhim，Iwasmerelyjocular，beinganentirestrangerintheseparts，andexpectingnoone。
　　Fortune，however，itwouldseem，hasbeenunexpectedlykindtome；
　　Iflattermyself，sir，thatsinceyouhavebeeninthisroomIhavehadthehonourofmakingyouracquaintance；andinthestrengthofthathopeIhumblyentreatyoutohonourmewithyourcompanytodinner，providedyouhavenotalreadydined。’
　　Thestrangerlaughedoutright。
　　’Sir，’Icontinued，’theroundofbeefisanobleone，andseemsexceedinglywellboiled，andthelandlordwasjustrightwhenhesaidIshouldhavesuchadinnerasisnotseeneveryday。Aroundofbeef，atanyratesucharoundofbeefasthis，isseldomseensmokinguponthetableinthesedegeneratetimes。Allowme，sir，’
　　saidI，observingthatthestrangerwasabouttospeak，’allowmeanotherremark。IthinkIsawyoujustnowtouchthefork；I
　　venturetohailitasanomenthatyouwillpresentlyseizeit，andapplyittoitsproperpurpose，anditscompaniontheknifealso。’
　　Thestrangerchangedcolour，andgazeduponmeinsilence。
　　’Do，sir，’hereputinthelandlord；’do，sir，accepttheyounggentleman’sinvitation。Yourhonourhasoflatebeenlookingpoorly，andtheyounggentlemanisafunnyyounggentleman，andacleveryounggentleman；andIthinkitwilldoyourhonourgoodtohaveadinner’schatwiththeyounggentleman。’
　　’Itisnotmydinnerhour，’saidthestranger；’Idineconsiderablylater；takinganythingnowwouldonlydiscomposeme；Ishall，however，bemosthappytositdownwiththeyounggentleman；reachmethatpaper，and，whentheyounggentlemanhassatisfiedhisappetite，wemayperhapshavealittlechattogether。’
　　Thelandlordhandedthestrangerthenewspaper，and，bowing，retiredwithhismaidJenny。Ihelpedmyselftoaportionofthesmokinground，andcommencedeatingwithnolittleappetite。Thestrangerappearedtobesoonengrossedwiththenewspaper。Wecontinuedthusaconsiderabletime-theonereadingandtheotherdining。Chancingsuddenlytocastmyeyesuponthestranger，Isawhisbrowcontract；hegaveaslightstampwithhisfoot，andflungthenewspapertotheground，thenstoopingdownhepickeditup，firstmovinghisforefingeralongthefloor，seeminglyslightlyscratchingitwithhisnail。
　　’Doyouhope，sir，’saidI，’bythatceremonywiththefingertopreserveyourselffromtheevilchance？’
　　Thestrangerstarted；then，afterlookingatmeforsometimeinsilence，hesaid，’Isitpossiblethatyou-？’
　　’Ay，ay，’saidI，helpingmyselftosomemoreoftheround；’Ihavetouchedmyselfinmyyoungerdays，bothfortheevilchanceandthegood。Can’tsay，though，thatIevertrustedmuchintheceremony。’
　　Thestrangermadenoreply，butappearedtobeindeepthought；
　　nothingfartherpassedbetweenusuntilIhadconcludedthedinner，whenIsaidtohim，’Ishallnowbemosthappy，sir，tohavethepleasureofyourconversationoverapintofwine。’