`Ido,Ido!Cleverwoman!Butyoumustbepreparedfortheconsequences。’
Puttinghisarmroundhershouldershekissedherthereandthen。
`Don’tdon’t,’shewhispered,laughinggood-humouredly。`Mymanwillhear。’
Shelethimoutofthehouse,andasshewentbackshesaidtoherself:`Well!Weakwomenmustprovideforarainyday。Andifmypoorfellowupstairsdogooff-asIsupposehewillsoon-it’swelltokeepchancesopen。AndIcan’tpickandchoosenowasIcouldwhenIwasyounger。
Andonemusttaketheoldifonecan’tgettheyoung。’
JudetheObscureChapter53VI-xiThelastpagestowhichthechronicleroftheseliveswouldaskthereader’sattentionareconcernedwiththesceneinandoutofJude’sbedroomwhenleafysummercameroundagain。
Hisfacewasnowsothinthathisoldfriendswouldhardlyhaveknownhim。Itwasafternoon,andArabellawasatthelooking-glasscurlingherhair,whichoperationsheperformedbyheatinganumbrella-stayintheflameofacandleshehadlighted,andusingitupontheflowinglock。
Whenshehadfinishedthis,practisedadimple,andputonherthings,shecasthereyesrounduponJude。Heseemedtobesleeping,thoughhispositionwasanelevatedone,hismaladypreventinghimlyingdown。
Arabella,hatted,gloved,andready,satdownandwaited,asifexpectingsomeonetocomeandtakeherplaceasnurse。
Certainsoundsfromwithoutrevealedthatthetownwasinfestivity,thoughlittleofthefestival,whateveritmighthavebeen,couldbeseenhere。Bellsbegantoring,andthenotescameintotheroomthroughtheopenwindow,andtravelledroundJude’sheadinahum。Theymadeherrestless,andatlastshesaidtoherself:`Whyeverdoesn’tFathercome!’
ShelookedagainatJude,criticallygaugedhisebbinglife,asshehaddonesomanytimesduringthelatemonths,andglancingathiswatch,whichwashungupbywayoftimepiece,roseimpatiently。Stillheslept,andcomingtoaresolutionsheslippedfromtheroom,closedthedoornoiselessly,anddescendedthestairs。Thehousewasempty。TheattractionwhichmovedArabellatogoabroadhadevidentlydrawnawaytheotherinmateslongbefore。
Itwasawarm,cloudless,enticingday。Sheshutthefrontdoor,andhastenedroundintoChiefStreet,andwhennearthetheatrecouldhearthenotesoftheorgan,arehearsalforacomingconcertbeinginprogress。
SheenteredunderthearchwayofOldgateCollege,wheremenwereputtingupawningsroundthequadrangleforaballinthehallthatevening。Peoplewhohadcomeupfromthecountryforthedaywerepicnickingonthegrass,andArabellawalkedalongthegravelpathsandundertheagedlimes。Butfindingthisplaceratherdullshereturnedtothestreets,andwatchedthecarriagesdrawingupfortheconcert,numerousdonsandtheirwives,andundergraduateswithgayfemalecompanions,crowdinguplikewise。Whenthedoorswereclosed,andtheconcertbegan,shemovedon。
Thepowerfulnotesofthatconcertrolledforththroughtheswingingyellowblindsoftheopenwindows,overthehousetops,andintothestillairofthelanes。TheyreachedsofarastotheroominwhichJudelay;
anditwasaboutthistimethathiscoughbeganagainandawakenedhim。
Assoonashecouldspeakhemurmured,hiseyesstillclosed:
`Alittlewater,please。’
Nothingbutthedesertedroomreceivedhisappeal,andhecoughedtoexhaustionagain-sayingstillmorefeebly:`Water-somewater-Sue-Arabella!’
Theroomremainedstillasbefore。Presentlyhegaspedagain:
`Throat-water-Sue-darling-dropofwater-please-ohplease!’
Nowatercame,andtheorgannotes,faintasabee’shum,rolledinasbefore。
Whileheremained,hisfacechanging,shoutsandhurrahscamefromsomewhereinthedirectionoftheriver。
`Ah-yes!TheRemembrancegames,’hemurmured。`AndIhere。AndSuedefiled!’
Thehurrahswererepeated,drowningthefaintorgannotes。Jude’sfacechangedmore:hewhisperedslowly,hisparchedlipsscarcelymoving:
`LetthedayperishwhereinIwasborn,andthenightinwhichitwassaid,thereisAman-childconceived。’
`Hurrah!’
`Letthatdaybedarkness;letnotgodregarditfromabove,neitherletthelightshineuponit。Lo,letthatnightbesolitary,letnojoyfulvoicecometherein。’
`Hurrah!’
`WhydiedInotfromthewomb?WhydidInotgiveuptheghostwhenIcameoutofthebelly?……FornowshouldIhavelainstillandbeenquiet。Ishouldhaveslept:thenhadIbeenatrest!’
`Hurrah!’
`Theretheprisonersresttogether;theyhearnotthevoiceoftheoppressor……thesmallandthegreatarethere;andtheservantisfreefromhismaster。Whereforeislightgiventohimthatisinmisery,andlifeuntothebitterinsoul?’
MeanwhileArabella,inherjourneytodiscoverwhatwasgoingon,tookashortcutdownanarrowstreetandthroughanobscurenookintothequadofCardinal。Itwasfullofbustle,andbrilliantinthesunlightwithflowersandotherpreparationsforaballherealso。Acarpenternoddedtoher,onewhohadformerlybeenafellow-workmanofJude’s。Acorridorwasincourseoferectionfromtheentrancetothehallstaircase,ofgayredandbuffbunting。Waggon-loadsofboxescontainingbrightplantsinfullbloomwerebeingplacedabout,andthegreatstaircasewascoveredwithredcloth。Shenoddedtooneworkmanandanother,andascendedtothehallonthestrengthoftheiracquaintance,wheretheywereputtingdownanewflooranddecoratingforthedance。
Thecathedralbellcloseathandwassoundingforfiveo’clockservice。
`Ishouldnotmindhavingaspintherewithafellow’sarmroundmywaist,’shesaidtooneofthemen。`ButLord,Imustbegettinghomeagain-there’salottodo。Nodancingforme!’
WhenshereachedhomeshewasmetatthedoorbyStagg,andoneortwootherofJude’sfellowstoneworkers。`Wearejustgoingdowntotheriver,’saidtheformer,`toseetheboat-bumping。Butwe’vecalledroundonourwaytoaskhowyourhusbandis。’
`He’ssleepingnicely,thankyou,’saidArabella。
`That’sright。Wellnow,can’tyougiveyourselfhalfanhour’srelaxation,Mrs。Fawley,andcomealongwithus?’Twoulddoyougood。’
`Ishouldliketogo,’saidshe。`I’veneverseentheboat-racing,andIhearitisgoodfun。’
`Comealong!’
`HowIwishIcould!’Shelookedlonginglydownthestreet。
`Waitaminute,then。I’lljustrunupandseehowheisnow。Fatheriswithhim,Ibelieve;soIcanmostlikelycome。’
Theywaited,andsheentered。Downstairstheinmateswereabsentasbefore,having,infact,goneinabodytotheriverwheretheprocessionofboatswastopass。Whenshereachedthebedroomshefoundthatherfatherhadnotevennowcome。
`Whycouldn’thehavebeenhere!’shesaidimpatiently。`Hewantstoseetheboatshimself-that’swhatitis!’
However,onlookingroundtothebedshebrightened,forshesawthatJudewasapparentlysleeping,thoughhewasnotintheusualhalf-elevatedposturenecessitatedbyhiscough。Hehadslippeddown,andlayflat。A
secondglancecausedhertostart,andshewenttothebed。Hisfacewasquitewhite,andgraduallybecomingrigid。Shetouchedhisfingers;theywerecold,thoughhisbodywasstillwarm。Shelistenedathischest。Allwasstillwithin。Thebumpingofnearthirtyyearshadceased。
Afterherfirstappalledsenseofwhathadhappenedthefaintnotesofamilitaryorotherbrassbandfromtheriverreachedherears;
andinaprovokedtonesheexclaimed,`Tothinkheshoulddiejustnow!
Whydidhediejustnow!’Thenmeditatinganothermomentortwoshewenttothedoor,softlycloseditasbefore,andagaindescendedthestairs。
`Heresheis!’saidoneoftheworkmen。`Wewonderedifyouwerecomingafterall。Comealong;wemustbequicktogetagoodplace……
Well,howishe?Sleepingwellstill?Ofcourse,wedon’twanttodrag’eeawayif-’
`Ohyes-sleepingquitesound。Hewon’twakeyet,’shesaidhurriedly。
TheywentwiththecrowddownCardinalStreet,wheretheypresentlyreachedthebridge,andthegaybargesburstupontheirview。Thencetheypassedbyanarrowslitdowntotheriversidepath-nowdusty,hot,andthronged。Almostassoonastheyhadarrivedthegrandprocessionofboatsbegan;theoarssmackingwithaloudkissonthefaceofthestream,astheywereloweredfromtheperpendicular。
`Oh,Isay-howjolly!I’mgladI’vecome,’saidArabella。`And-itcan’thurtmyhusband-mybeingaway。’
Ontheoppositesideoftheriver,onthecrowdedbarges,weregorgeousnosegaysoffemininebeauty,fashionablyarrayedingreen,pink,blue,andwhite。Theblueflagoftheboatclubdenotedthecentreofinterest,beneathwhichabandinreduniformgaveoutthenotesshehadalreadyheardinthedeath-chamber。Collegiansofallsorts,incanoeswithladies,watchingkeenlyfor`our’boat,dartedupanddown。WhilesheregardedthelivelyscenesomebodytouchedArabellaintheribs,andlookingroundshesawVilbert。
`Thatphiltreisoperating,youknow!’hesaidwithaleer。`Shameon’eetowreckaheartso!’
`Ishan’ttalkofloveto-day。’
`Whynot?Itisageneralholiday。’
Shedidnotreply。Vilbert’sarmstoleroundherwaist,whichactcouldbeperformedunobservedinthecrowd。AnarchexpressionoverspreadArabella’sfaceatthefeelofthearm,butshekepthereyesontheriverasifshedidnotknowoftheembrace。
Thecrowdsurged,pushingArabellaandherfriendssometimesnearlyintotheriver,andshewouldhavelaughedheartilyatthehorse-playthatsucceeded,iftheimprintonhermind’seyeofapale,statuesquecountenanceshehadlatelygazeduponhadnotsoberedheralittle。
Thefunonthewaterreachedtheacmeofexcitement;therewereimmersions,therewereshouts:theracewaslostandwon,thepinkandblueandyellowladiesretiredfromthebarges,andthepeoplewhohadwatchedbegantomove。
`Well-it’sbeenawfullygood,’criedArabella。`ButIthinkImustgetbacktomypoorman。Fatheristhere,sofarasIknow;butIhadbettergetback。’
`What’syourhurry?’
`Well,Imustgo……Dear,dear,thisisawkward!’
Atthenarrowgangwaywherethepeopleascendedfromtheriversidepathtothebridgethecrowdwasliterallyjammedintoonehotmass-ArabellaandVilbertwiththerest;andheretheyremainedmotionless,Arabellaexclaiming,`Dear,dear!’moreandmoreimpatiently;forithadjustoccurredtohermindthatifJudewerediscoveredtohavediedaloneaninquestmightbedeemednecessary。
`Whatafidgetyouare,mylove,’saidthephysician,who,beingpressedcloseagainstherbythethrong,hadnoneedofpersonaleffortforcontact。`Justaswellhavepatience:there’snogettingawayyet!’
Itwasnearlytenminutesbeforethewedgedmultitudemovedsufficientlytoletthempassthrough。AssoonasshegotupintothestreetArabellahastenedon,forbiddingthephysiciantoaccompanyherfurtherthatday。
Shedidnotgostraighttoherhouse;buttotheabodeofawomanwhoperformedthelastnecessaryofficesforthepoorerdead;wheresheknocked。
`Myhusbandhasjustgone,poorsoul,’shesaid。`Canyoucomeandlayhimout?’
Arabellawaitedafewminutes;andthetwowomenwentalong,elbowingtheirwaythroughthestreamoffashionablepeoplepouringoutofCardinalmeadow,andbeingnearlyknockeddownbythecarriages。
`Imustcallatthesexton’saboutthebell,too,’saidArabella。
`Itisjustroundhere,isn’tit?I’llmeetyouatmydoor。’
Byteno’clockthatnightJudewaslyingonthebedsteadathislodgingcoveredwithasheet,andstraightasanarrow。Throughthepartlyopenedwindowthejoyousthrobofawaltzenteredfromtheball-roomatCardinal。
Twodayslater,whentheskywasequallycloudless,andtheairequallystill,twopersonsstoodbesideJude’sopencoffininthesamelittlebedroom。OnonesidewasArabella,ontheothertheWidowEdlin。
TheywerebothlookingatJude’sface,thewornoldeyelidsofMrs。Edlinbeingred。
`Howbeautifulheis!’saidshe。
`Yes。He’sa’andsomecorpse,’saidArabella。
Thewindowwasstillopentoventilatetheroom,anditbeingaboutnoontidetheclearairwasmotionlessandquietwithout。Fromadistancecamevoices;andanapparentnoiseofpersonsstamping。
`What’sthat?’murmuredtheoldwoman。
`Oh,that’sthedoctorsinthetheatre,conferringhonorarydegreesontheDukeofHamptonshireandalotmoreillustriousgentsofthatsort。
It’sRemembranceWeek,youknow。Thecheerscomefromtheyoungmen。’
`Aye;youngandstrong-lunged!Notlikeourpoorboyhere。’
Anoccasionalword,asfromsomeonemakingaspeech,floatedfromtheopenwindowsofthetheatreacrosstothisquietcorner,atwhichthereseemedtobeasmileofsomesortuponthemarblefeaturesofJude;
whiletheold,superseded,DelphineditionsofVirgilandHorace,andthedog-earedGreekTestamentontheneighbouringshelf,andthefewothervolumesofthesortthathehadnotpartedwith,roughenedwithstone-dustwherehehadbeeninthehabitofcatchingthemupforafewminutesbetweenhislabours,seemedtopaletoasicklycastatthesounds。Thebellsstruckoutjoyously;andtheirreverberationstravelledroundthebed-room。
Arabella’seyesremovedfromJudetoMrs。Edlin。`D’yethinkshewillcome?’sheasked。
`Icouldnotsay。Shesworenottoseehimagain。’
`Howisshelooking?’
`Tiredandmiserable,poorheart。Yearsandyearsolderthanwhenyousawherlast。Quiteastaid,wornwomannow。’Tistheman-shecan’tstomachun,evennow!’
`IfJudehadbeenalivetoseeher,hewouldhardlyhavecaredforheranymore,perhaps。’
`That’swhatwedon’tknow……Didn’theeveraskyoutosendforher,sincehecametoseeherinthatstrangeway?’
`No。Quitethecontrary。Iofferedtosend,andhesaidIwasnottoletherknowhowillhewas。’
`Didheforgiveher?’
`NotasIknow。’
`Well-poorlittlething,’tistobebelievedshe’sfoundforgivenesssomewhere!Shesaidshehadfoundpeace!
`Shemayswearthatonherkneestotheholycrossuponhernecklacetillshe’shoarse,butitwon’tbetrue!’saidArabella。`She’sneverfoundpeacesinceshelefthisarms,andneverwillagaintillshe’sasheisnow!