Contents：
Announcementin"HouseholdWords"
ThePoorManandhisBeerFiveNewPointsofCriminalLawLeighHunt：ARemonstranceTheTattlesnivelBleaterTheYoungManfromtheCountryAnEnlightenedClergymanRatheraStrongDoseTheMartyrMediumTheLateMr。StanfieldASlightQuestionofFactLandor’sLifeAddresswhichappearedshortlyprevioustothecompletionofthe20thvolumeANNOUNCEMENTIN"HOUSEHOLDWORDS"OFTHEAPPROACHINGPUBLICATIONOF
"ALLTHEYEARROUND"
AftertheappearanceofthepresentconcludingNumberofHouseholdWords，thispublicationwillmergeintothenewweeklypublication，AlltheYearRound，andthetitle，HouseholdWords，willformapartofthetitle—pageofAlltheYearRound。
TheProspectusofthelatterJournaldescribesitinthesewords：
"ADDRESS
"NineyearsofHouseholdWords，arethebestpracticalassurancethatcanbeofferedtothepublic，ofthespiritandobjectsofAlltheYearRound。
"Intransferringmyself，andmystrongestenergies，fromthepublicationthatisabouttobediscontinued，tothepublicationthatisabouttobebegun，IhavethehappinessoftakingwithmethestaffofwriterswithwhomIhavelaboured，andalltheliteraryandbusinessco—operationthatcanmakemyworkapleasure。Insomeimportantrespects，Iamnowfreegreatlytoadvanceonpastarrangements。Those，Ileavetotestifyforthemselvesinduecourse。
"Thatfusionofthegracesoftheimaginationwiththerealitiesoflife，whichisvitaltothewelfareofanycommunity，andforwhichIhavestrivenfromweektoweekashonestlyasIcouldduringthelastnineyears，willcontinuetobestrivenfor"alltheyearround"。TheoldweeklycaresanddutiesbecomethingsofthePast，merelytobeassumed，withanincreasedloveforthemandbrighterhopesspringingoutofthem，inthePresentandtheFuture。
"Ilook，andplan，foraverymuchwidercircleofreaders，andyetagainforasteadilyexpandingcircleofreaders，intheprojectsI
hopetocarrythrough"alltheyearround"。AndIfeelconfidentthatthisexpectationwillberealized，ifitdeserverealization。
"Thetaskofmynewjournalisset，anditwillsteadilytrytoworkthetaskout。Itspagesshallshowtowhatgoodpurposetheirmottoisrememberedinthem，andwithhowmuchoffidelityandearnestnesstheytell"thestoryofourlivesfromyeartoyear。
"CHARLESDICKENS。"
Sincethiswasissued，theJournalitselfhascomeintoexistence，andhasspokenforitselffiveweeks。ItsfifthNumberispublishedto—day，anditscirculation，moderatelystated，treblesthatnowrelinquishedinHouseholdWords。
Inreferringourreaders，henceforth，toAlltheYearRound，wecanbutassurethemafresh，ofourunwearyingandfaithfulservice，inwhatisatoncetheworkandthechiefpleasureofourlife。
Throughallthatwearedoing，andthroughallthatwedesigntodo，ouraimistodoourbestinsincerityofpurpose，andtruedevotionofspirit。
Wedonotforamomentsupposethatwemayleanonthecharacterofthesepages，andrestcontentedatthepointwheretheystop。Weseeinthatpointbutastarting—placeforournewjourney；andonthatjourney，withnewprospectsopeningoutbeforeuseverywhere，wejoyfullyproceed，entreatingourreaders——withoutanyofthepainofleave—takingincidentaltomostjourneys——tobearuscompanyAlltheyearround。
Saturday，May28，1859。
THEPOORMANANDHISBEER
MyfriendPhilosewersandI，contemplatingafarm—labourertheotherday，whowasdrinkinghismugofbeeronasettleataroadsideale—
housedoor，wefelltohummingthefag—endofanoldditty，ofwhichthepoormanandhisbeer，andthesinofpartingthem，formthedolefulburden。Philosewersthenmentionedtomethatafriendofhisinanagriculturalcounty——sayaHertfordshirefriend——had，fortwoyearslastpast，endeavouredtoreconcilethepoormanandhisbeertopublicmorality，bymakingitapointofhonourbetweenhimselfandthepoormanthatthelattershouldusehisbeerandnotabuseit。Interestedinaneffortofsounobtrusiveandunspeechifyinganature，"OPhilosewers，"saidI，afterthemannerofthedrearysagesinEasternapologues，"Showme，Ipray，themanwhodeemsthattemperancecanbeattainedwithoutamedal，anoration，abanner，andadenunciationofhalftheworld，andwhohasatoncetheheadandhearttosetaboutit!"
Philosewersexpressing，inreply，hiswillingnesstogratifythedrearysage，anappointmentwasmadeforthepurpose。Andonthedayfixed，I，theDrearyone，accompaniedbyPhilosewers，wentdownNor’—Westperrailway，insearchoftemperatetemperance。Itwasathunderousday；andthecloudsweresoimmoderatelywatery，andsoverymuchdisposedtosourallthebeerinHertfordshire，thattheyseemedtohavetakenthepledge。
But，thesunburstforthgailyintheafternoon，andgildedtheoldgables，andoldmullionedwindows，andoldweathercockandoldclock—face，ofthequaintoldhousewhichisthedwellingofthemanwesought。HowshallIdescribehim？Asoneofthemostfamouspracticalchemistsoftheage？Thatdesignationwilldoaswellasanother——better，perhaps，thanmostothers。Andhisname？FriarBacon。
"Though，takenotice，Philosewers，"saidI，behindmyhand，"thatthefirstFriarBaconhadnotthathandsomelady—wifebesidehim。
Wherein，OPhilosewers，hewasachemist，wretchedandforlorn，comparedwithhissuccessor。YoungRomeobadetheholyfatherLawrencehangupphilosophy，unlessphilosophycouldmakeaJuliet。
ChemistrywouldinfalliblybehangedifitslifewerestakedonmakinganythinghalfsopleasantasthisJuliet。"ThegentlePhilosewerssmiledassent。
Theforegoingwhisperfrommyself，theDrearyone，tickledtheearofPhilosewers，aswewalkedonthetrimgardenterracebeforedinner，amongtheearlyleavesandblossoms；twopeacocks，apparentlyinverytightnewboots，occasionallycrossingthegravelatadistance。Thesun，shiningthroughtheoldhouse—windows，nowandthenflashedoutsomebrilliantpieceofcolourfrombrighthangingswithin，orupontheoldoakpanelling；similarly，FriarBacon，aswepacedtoandfro，revealedlittleglimpsesofhisgoodwork。
"Itisnotmuch，"saidhe。"Itisnowonderfulthing。Thereusedtobeagreatdealofdrunkennesshere，andIwantedtomakeitbetterifIcould。Thepeopleareveryignorant，andhavebeenmuchneglected，andIwantedtomakeTHATbetter，ifIcould。Myutmostobjectwas，tohelpthemtoalittleself—governmentandalittlehomelypleasure。Ionlyshowthewaytobetterthings，andadvisethem。Ineveractforthem；Ineverinterfere；aboveall，Ineverpatronise。"
IhadsaidtoPhilosewersaswecamealongNor’—WestthatpatronagewasoneofthecursesofEngland；IappearedtoriseintheestimationofPhilosewerswhenthusconfirmed。
"Andso，"saidFriarBacon，"IestablishedmyAllotment—club，andmypig—clubs，andthoselittleConcertsbytheladiesofmyownfamily，ofwhichwehavethelastoftheseasonthisevening。Theyareagreatsuccess，forthepeoplehereareamazinglyfondofmusic。Butthereistheearlydinner—bell，andIhavenoneedtotalkofmyendeavourswhenyouwillsoonseethemintheirworkingdress"。
Dinnerdone，beholdtheFriar，Philosewers，andmyselftheDrearyone，walking，atsixo’clock，acrossthefields，tothe"Club—
house。"
Asweswungopenthelastfield—gateandenteredtheAllotment—
grounds，manymemberswerealreadyontheirwaytotheClub，whichstandsinthemidstoftheallotments。Whocouldhelpthinkingofthewonderfulcontrastbetweentheseclub—menandtheclub—menofSt。James’sStreet，orPallMall，inLondon!Lookatyonderprematurelyoldman，doubledupwithwork，andleaningonarudestickmorecrookedthanhimself，slowlytrudgingtotheclub—house，inashapelesshatlikeanItalianharlequin’s，oranoldbrown—
paperbag，leathernleggings，anddullgreensmock—frock，lookingasthoughduck—weedhadaccumulatedonit——theresultofitsstagnantlife——orasifitwereavegetableproduction，originallymeanttoblowintosomethingbetter，butstoppedsomehow。ComparehimwithOldCousinFeenix，amblingalongSt。James’sStreet，gotupinthestyleofacoupleofgenerationsago，andwithaheadofhair，acomplexion，andasetofteeth，profoundlyimpossibletobebelievedinbythewideststretchofhumancredulity。Cantheybothbemenandbrothers？Verilytheyare。AndalthoughCousinFeenixhaslivedsofastthathewilldieatBaden—Baden，andalthoughthisclub—maninthefrockhaslived，eversincehecametoman’sestate，onnineshillingsaweek，andissuretodieintheUnionifhedieinbed，yethebroughtasmuchintotheworldasCousinFeenix，andwilltakeasmuchout——more，formoreofhimisreal。
Apretty，simplebuilding，theclub—house，witharusticcolonnadeoutside，underwhichthememberscansitonwetevenings，lookingatthepatchesofgroundtheycultivateforthemselves；within，awell—
ventilatedroom，largeandlofty，cheerfulpavementofcolouredtiles，abarforservingoutthebeer，goodsupplyofformsandchairs，andabravebigchimney—corner，wherethefireburnscheerfully。Adjoiningthisroom，another：
"Builtforareading—room，"saidFriarBacon；"butnotmuchused——
yet。"
Thedrearysage，lookinginthroughthewindow，perceivingafixedreading—deskwithin，andinquiringitsuse：
"IhaveServicethere，"saidFriarBacon。"Theyneverwentanywheretohearprayers，andofcourseitwouldbehopelesstohelpthemtobehappierandbetter，iftheyhadnoreligiousfeelingatall。"
"Thewholeplaceisverypretty。"Thusthesage。
"Iamgladyouthinkso。IbuiltitfortheholdersoftheAllotment—grounds，andgaveitthem：onlyrequiringthemtomanageitbyacommitteeoftheirownappointing，andnevertogetdrunkthere。Theyneverhavegotdrunkthere。"
"Yettheyhavetheirbeerfreely？"
"Oyes。Asmuchastheychoosetobuy。Theclubgetsitsbeerdirectfromthebrewer，bythebarrel。Sotheygetitgood；atoncemuchcheaper，andmuchbetter，thanatthepublic—house。Thememberstakeitinturnstobesteward，andserveoutthebeer：ifamanshoulddeclinetoservewhenhisturncame，hewouldpayafineoftwopence。Thestewardlasts，aslongasthebarrellasts。
Whenthereisanewbarrel，thereisanewsteward。"
"Whatanoblefireisroaringupthatchimney!"
"Yes，acapitalfire。Everymemberpaysahalfpennyaweek。"
"EverymembermustbetheholderofanAllotment—garden？"
"Yes；forwhichhepaysfiveshillingsayear。TheAllotmentsyouseeaboutus，occupysomesixteenoreighteenacres，andeachgardenisaslargeasexperienceshowsonemantobeabletomanage。Youseehowadmirablytheyaretilled，andhowmuchtheygetoffthem。
Theyarealwaysworkinginthemintheirsparehours；andwhenamanwantsamugofbeer，insteadofgoingofftothevillageandthepublic—house，heputsdownhisspadeorhishoe，comestotheclub—
houseandgetsit，andgoesbacktohiswork。Whenhehasdonework，helikestohavehisbeerattheclub，still，andtositandlookathislittlecropsastheythrive。"
"Theyseemtomanagetheclubverywell。"
"Perfectlywell。Herearetheirownrules。Theymadethem。I
neverinterferewiththem，excepttoadvisethemwhentheyaskme。"
RULESANDREGULATIONS
MADEBYTHECOMMITTEE
Fromthe21stSeptember，1857
Onehalf—pennyperweektobepaidtotheclubbyeachmember1。——Eachmembertodrawthebeerinorder，accordingtothenumberofhisallotment；onfailing，aforfeitoftwopencetobepaidtotheclub。
2。——Thememberthatdrawsthebeertopayforthesame，andbringhisticketupreceiptedwhenthesubscriptionsarepaid；onfailingtodoso，apenaltyofsixpencetobeforfeitedandpaidtotheclub。
3。——Thesubscriptionsandforfeitstobepaidattheclub—roomonthelastSaturdaynightofeachmonth。
4。——Thesubscriptionsandforfeitstobeclearedupeveryquarter；
ifnot，apenaltyofsixpencetobepaidtotheclub。
5。——Thememberthatdrawsthebeertobeattheclub—roombysixo’clockeveryevening，andstaytillten；butintheeventofnomemberbeingthere，hemayleaveatnine；onfailingsotoattend，apenaltyofsixpencetobepaidtotheclub。
6。——Anymembergivingbeertoastrangerinthisclub—room，exceptingtohiswifeorfamily，shallbeliabletothepenaltyofoneshilling。
7。——Anymemberliftinghishandtostrikeanotherinthisclub—roomshallbeliabletothepenaltyofsixpence。
8。——Anymemberswearinginthisclub—roomshallbeliabletoapenaltyoftwopenceeachtime。
9。——Anymembersellingbeershallbeexpelledfromtheclub。
10。——Anymemberwishingtogiveuphisallotment，mayapplytothecommittee，andtheyshallvaluethecropandtheconditionoftheground。Theamountofthevaluationshallbepaidbythesucceedingtenant，whoshallbeallowedtoenteronanypartoftheallotmentwhichisuncroppedatthetimeofnoticeoftheleavingtenant。
11。——Anymembernotkeepinghisallotment—gardenclearfromseed—
weeds，orotherwiseinjuringhisneighbours，maybeturnedoutofhisgardenbythevotesoftwo—thirdsofthecommittee，onemonth’snoticebeinggiventohim。
12。——Anymembercarelesslybreakingamug，istopaythecostofreplacingthesame。
IwassolicitingtheattentionofPhilosewerstosomeoldoldbonnetshangingintheAllotment—gardenstofrightenthebirds，andthefashionofwhichIshouldthinkwouldterrifyaFrenchbirdtodeathatanydistance，whenPhilosewerssolicitedmyattentiontothescrapersattheclub—housedoor。TheamountofthesoilofEnglandwhicheverymemberbroughtthereonhisfeet，wasindeedsurprising；andevenI，whoamprofessedlyasalad—eater，couldhavegrownasaladformydinner，intheearthonanymember’sfrockorhat。
"Now，"saidFriarBacon，lookingathiswatch，"forthePig—clubs!"
ThedrearySageentreatedexplanation。
"Why，apigissoveryvaluabletoapoorlabouringman，anditissoverydifficultforhimatthistimeoftheyeartogetmoneyenoughtobuyone，thatIlendhimapoundforthepurpose。But，I
doitinthisway。Ileavesuchoftheclubmembersaschooseitanddesireit，toformthemselvesintopartiesoffive。Toeverymanineachcompanyoffive，Ilendapound，tobuyapig。But，eachmanofthefivebecomesboundforeveryotherman，astotherepaymentofhismoney。Consequently，theylookafteroneanother，andpickouttheirpartnerswithcare；selectingmeninwhomtheyhaveconfidence。"
"Theyrepaythemoney，Isuppose，whenthepigisfattened，killed，andsold？"
"Yes。Thentheyrepaythemoney。Andtheydorepayit。Ihadoneman，lastyear，whowasalittletardy（hewasinthehabitofgoingtothepublic—house）；butevenhedidpay。ItisanimmenseAdvantagetooneofthesepoorfellowstohaveapig。Thepigconsumestherefusefromtheman’scottageandallotment—garden，andthepig’srefuseenrichestheman’sgardenbesides。Thepigisthepoorman’sfriend。Comeintotheclub—houseagain。"
Thepoorman’sfriend。Yes。Ihaveoftenwonderedwhoreallywasthepoorman’sfriendamongagreatnumberofcompetitors，andInowclearlyperceivehimtobethepig。HEnevermakesanyflourishesaboutthepoorman。HEnevergammonsthepoorman——excepttohismanifestadvantageinthearticleofbacon。HEnevercomesdowntothishouse，orgoesdowntohisconstituents。Heopenlydeclarestothepoorman，"IwantmystybecauseIamaPig。Idesiretohaveasmuchtoeatasyoucanbyanymeansstuffmewith，becauseIamaPig。"HEnevergivesthepoormanasovereignforbringingupafamily。HEnevergruntsthepoorman’snameinvain。AndwhenhediesintheodourofPorkity，hecutsup，ahighlyusefulcreatureandablessingtothepoorman，fromtheringinhissnouttothecurlinhistail。Whichofthepoorman’sotherfriendscansayasmuch？WhereistheM。P。whomeansMerePork？
ThedrearySagehadglidedintothesereflections，whenhefoundhimselfsittingbytheclub—housefire，surroundedbygreensmock—
frocksandshapelesshats：withFriarBaconlively，busy，andexpert，atalittletablenearhim。
"Now，then，come。Thefirstfive!"saidFriarBacon。"Whereareyou？"
"Order!"criedamerry—facedlittleman，whohadbroughthisyoungdaughterwithhimtoseelife，andwhoalwaysmodestlyhidhisfaceinhisbeer—mugafterhehadthusassistedthebusiness。
"JohnNightingale，WilliamThrush，JosephBlackbird，CecilRobin，andThomasLinnet!"criedFriarBacon。
"Here，sir!"and"Here，sir!"AndLinnet，Robin，Blackbird，Thrush，andNightingale，stoodconfessed。
We，theundersigned，declare，ineffect，bythiswrittenpaper，thateachofusisresponsiblefortherepaymentofthispig—moneybyeachoftheother。"Sureyouunderstand，Nightingale？"
"Ees，sur。"
"Canyouwriteyourname，Nightingale？"
"Na，sur。"
Nightingale’seyeuponhisname，asFriarBaconwroteit，wasasighttoconsiderinafteryears。RatherincredulouswasNightingale，withahandatthecornerofhismouth，andhisheadononeside，astothosedrawingsreallymeaninghim。DoubtfulwasNightingalewhetheranyvirtuehadgoneoutofhiminthatcommittaltopaper。MeditativewasNightingaleastowhatwouldcomeofyoungNightingale’sgrowinguptotheacquisitionofthatart。SuspendedwastheinterestofNightingale，whenhisnamewasdone——asifhethoughttheletterswereonlysown，tocomeuppresentlyinsomeotherform。Prodigious，andwrong—handedwasthecrossmadebyNightingaleonmuchencouragement——thestrokesdirectedfromhiminsteadoftowardshim；andmostpatientandsweet—humouredwasthesmileofNightingaleashesteppedbackintoagenerallaugh。
"Order!"criedthelittleman。Immediatelydisappearingintohismug。
"RalphMangel，RogerWurzel，EdwardVetches，MatthewCarrot，andCharlesTaters!"saidFriarBacon。
"Allhere，sir。"
"Youunderstandit，Mangel？"
"Iss，sir，Iunnerstaansit。"
"Canyouwriteyourname，Mangel？"
"Iss，sir。"
Breathlessinterest。Adensebackgroundofsmock—frocksaccumulatedbehindMangel，andmanyeyesinitlookeddoubtfullyatFriarBacon，aswhoshouldsay，"Canhereallythough？"Mangelputdownhishat，retiredalittletogetagoodlookatthepaper，wettedhisrighthandthoroughlybydrawingitslowlyacrosshismouth，approachedthepaperwithgreatdetermination，flattenedit，satdownatit，andgotwelltohiswork。Circuitousandsea—serpent—like，werethemovementsofthetongueofMangelwhileheformedtheletters；
elevatedweretheeyebrowsofMangelandsidelongtheeyes，as，withhisleftwhiskerreposingonhisleftarm，theyfollowedhisperformance；manywerethemisgivingsofMangel，andslowwashisretrospectivemeditationtouchingthejunctionoftheletterpwithh；somethingtooactivewasthebigforefingerofMangelinitspropensitytoruboutwithoutprovedcause。Atlast，longanddeepwasthebreathdrawnbyMangelwhenhelaiddownthepen；longanddeepthewonderingbreathdrawnbythebackground——asiftheyhadwatchedhiswalkingacrosstherapidsofNiagara，onstilts，andnowcried，"Hehasdoneit!"
But，Mangelwasanhonestman，ifeverhonestmanlived。"T’owttobeahell，sir，"saidhe，contemplatinghiswork，"andIha’madeaton’t。"
Theover—fraughtbosomsofthebackgroundfoundreliefinaroaroflaughter。
"OR—DER!"criedthelittleman。"CHEER!"Andafterthatsecondword，cameforthfromhismugnomore。
Severalotherclubssigned，andreceivedtheirmoney。Veryfewcouldwritetheirnames；allwhocouldnot，pleadedthattheycouldnot，moreorlesssorrowfully，andalwayswithashakeofthehead，andinalowervoicethantheirnaturalspeakingvoice。Crossescouldbemadestanding；signaturesmustbesatdownto。Therewasnoexceptiontothisrule。Meantime，thevariousclub—memberssmoked，dranktheirbeer，andtalkedtogetherquiteunrestrained。
Theyallworetheirhats，exceptwhentheywentuptoFriarBacon’stable。Themerry—facedlittlemanofferedhisbeer，withanaturalgood—fellowship，bothtotheDrearyoneandPhilosewers。Bothpartookofitwiththanks。
"Seveno’clock!"saidFriarBacon。"Andnowwebettergetacrosstotheconcert，men，forthemusicwillbebeginning。"
TheconcertwasinFriarBacon’slaboratory；alargebuildingnearathand，inanopenfield。Thebettermostpeopleofthevillageandneighbourhoodwereinagalleryononeside，and，inagalleryoppositetheorchestra。Thewholespacebelowwasfilledwiththelabouringpeopleandtheirfamilies，tothenumberoffiveorsixhundred。Wehadbeenobligedtoturnawaytwohundredto—night，FriarBaconsaid，forwantofroom——andthat，notcountingtheboys，ofwhomwehadtakeninonlyafewpickedones，byreasonoftheboys，asaclass，beinggiventotooferventacustomofapplaudingwiththeirboot—heels。
TheperformersweretheladiesofFriarBacon’sfamily，andtwogentlemen；oneofthem，whopresided，aDoctorofMusic。Apianowastheonlyinstrument。Amongthevocalpieces，wehadanegromelody（rapturouslyencored），theIndianDrum，andtheVillageBlacksmith；neitherdidwewantforfashionableItalian，havingAh!
nongiunge，andMimancalavoce。Oursuccesswassplendid；ourgood—humoured，unaffected，andmodestbearing，apattern。Astotheaudience，theywerefarmorepoliteandfarmorepleasedthanattheOpera；theywerefaultless。Thusforbarelyanhourtheconcertlasted，withthousandsofgreatbottleslookingonfromthewalls，containingtheresultsofFriarBacon’sMillionandoneexperimentsinagriculturalchemistry；andcontainingtoo，nodoubt，avarietyofmaterialswithwhichtheFriarcouldhaveblownusallthroughtheroofatfiveminutes’notice。
GodsavetheQueenbeingdone，thegoodFriarsteppedforwardandsaidafewwords，moreparticularlyconcerningtwopoints；firstly，thatSaturdayhalf—holiday，whichitwouldbekindinfarmerstogrant；secondly，theadditionalAllotment—groundsweweregoingtoestablish，inconsequenceofthehappysuccessofthesystem，butwhichwecouldnotguaranteeshouldentitletheholderstobemembersoftheclub，becausethepresentmembersmustconsiderandsettlethatquestionforthemselves：abargainbetweenmanandmanbeingalwaysabargain，andwehavingmadeovertheclubtothemastheoriginalAllotment—men。Thiswasloudlyapplauded，andso，withcontentedandaffectionatecheering，itwasallover。
AsPhilosewers，andItheDreary，postedbacktoLondon，lookingupatthemoonanddiscussingitasaworldpreparingforthehabitationofresponsiblecreatures，weexpatiatedonthehonourduetomeninthisworldofourswhotrytoprepareitforahighercourse，andtoleavetheracewholiveanddieuponitbetterthantheyfoundthem。
FIVENEWPOINTSOFCRIMINALLAW
TheexistingCriminalLawhasbeenfoundintrialsforMurder，tobesoexceedinglyhasty，unfair，andoppressive——inaword，tobesoveryobjectionabletotheamiablepersonsaccusedofthatthoughtlessact——thatitis，weunderstand，theintentionoftheGovernmenttobringinaBillforitsamendment。Wehavebeenfavouredwithanoutlineofitsprobableprovisions。
ItwillbegroundedontheprofoundprinciplethattherealoffenderistheMurderedPerson；butforwhoseobstinatepersistencyinbeingmurdered，theinterestingfellow—creaturetobetriedcouldnothavegotintotrouble。
Itsleadingenactmentsmaybeexpectedtoresolvethemselvesunderthefollowingheads：
1。Thereshallbenojudge。Strongrepresentationshavebeenmadebyhighlypopularculpritsthatthepresenceofthisobtrusivecharacterisprejudicialtotheirbestinterests。TheCourtwillbecomposedofapoliticalgentleman，sittinginasecludedroomcommandingaviewofSt。James’sPark，whohasalreadymoretodothananyhumancreaturecan，byanystretchofthehumanimagination，besupposedcapableofdoing。
2。ThejurytoconsistofFiveThousandFiveHundredandFifty—fiveVolunteers。
3。Thejurytobestrictlyprohibitedfromseeingeithertheaccusedorthewitnesses。Theyarenottobesworn。Theyareonnoaccounttoheartheevidence。Theyaretoreceiveit，orsuchrepresentationsofit，asmayhappentofallintheirway；andtheywillconstantlywritelettersaboutittoallthePapers。
4。SupposingthetrialtobeatrialforMurderbypoisoning，andsupposingthehypotheticalcase，ortheevidence，fortheprosecutiontochargetheadministrationoftwopoisons，sayArsenicandAntimony；andsupposingthetaintofArsenicinthebodytobepossiblebutnotprobable，andthepresenceofAntimonyinthebody，tobeanabsolutecertainty；itwillthenbecomethedutyofthejurytoconfinetheirattentionsolelytotheArsenic，andentirelytodismisstheAntimonyfromtheirminds。
5。Thesymptomsprecedingthedeathoftherealoffender（orMurderedPerson）beingdescribedinevidencebymedicalpractitionerswhosawthem，othermedicalpractitionerswhoneversawthemshallberequiredtostatewhethertheyareinconsistentwithcertainknowndiseases——but，THEYSHALLNEVERBEASKEDWHETHER
THEYARENOTEXACTLYCONSISTENTWITHTHEADMINISTRATIONOFPOISON。
ToillustratethisenactmentintheproposedBillbyacase：—A
ragingmaddogisseentorunintothehousewhereZlivesalone，foamingatthemouth。Zandthemaddogareforsometimelefttogetherinthathouseunderprovedcircumstances，irresistiblyleadingtotheconclusionthatZhasbeenbittenbythedog。Zisafterwardsfoundlyingonhisbedinastateofhydrophobia，andwiththemarksofthedog’steeth。Now，thesymptomsofthatdiseasebeingidenticalwiththoseofanotherdiseasecalledTetanus，whichmightsuperveneonZ’srunningarustynailintoacertainpartofhisfoot，medicalpractitionerswhoneversawZ，shallbeartestimonytothatabstractfact，anditshallthenbeincumbentontheRegistrar—GeneraltocertifythatZdiedofarustynail。
Itishopedthatthesealterationsinthepresentmodeofprocedurewillnotonlybequitesatisfactorytotheaccusedperson（whichisthefirstgreatconsideration），butwillalsotend，inatolerabledegree，tothewelfareandsafetyofsociety。ForitisnotsoughtinthismoderateandprudentmeasuretobewhollydeniedthatitisaninconveniencetoSocietytobepoisonedovermuch。
LEIGHHUNT：AREMONSTRANCE
"Thesenseofbeautyandgentleness，ofmoralbeautyandfaithfulgentleness，grewuponhimasthecleareveningclosedin。WhenhewenttovisithisrelativeatPutney，hestillcarriedwithhimhiswork，andthebookshemoreimmediatelywanted。Althoughhisbodilypowershadbeengivingway，hismostconspicuousqualities，hismemoryforbooks，andhisaffectionremained；andwhenhishairwaswhite，whenhisamplechesthadgrownslender，whentheveryproportionofhisheighthadvisiblylessened，hisstepwasstillready，andhisdarkeyesbrightenedateveryhappyexpression，andateverythoughtofkindness。Hisdeathwassimplyexhaustion；hebrokeoffhisworktoliedownandrepose。Sogentlewasthefinalapproach，thathescarcelyrecognisedittilltheverylast，andthenitcamewithoutterrors。Hisphysicalsufferinghadnotbeensevere；atthelatesthourhesaidthathisonlyuneasinesswasfailingbreath。Andthatfailingbreathwasusedtoexpresshissenseoftheinexhaustiblekindnesshehadreceivedfromthefamilywhohadbeensounexpectedlymadehisnurses，——todrawfromoneofhissons，byminute，eager，andsearchingquestions，allthathecouldlearnaboutthelatestvicissitudesandgrowinghopesofItaly，——toaskthefriendsandchildrenaroundhimfornewsofthosewhomheloved，——andtosendloveandmessagestotheabsentwholovedhim。"
Thus，withamanlysimplicityandfilialaffection，writestheeldestsonofLeighHuntinrecordinghisfather’sdeath。ThesearetheclosingwordsofaneweditionofTheAutobiographyofLeighHunt，publishedbyMessrs。SmithandElder，ofCornhill，revisedbythatson，andenrichedwithanintroductorychapterofremarkablebeautyandtenderness。Theson’sfirstpresentationofhisfathertothereader，"rathertall，straightasanarrow，lookingslendererthanhereallywas；hishairblackandshining，andslightlyinclinedtowave；hisheadhigh，hisforeheadstraightandwhite，hiseyesblackandsparkling，hisgeneralcomplexiondark；inhiswholecarriageandmanneranextraordinarydegreeoflife，"
completesthepicture。Itisthepictureoftheflourishingandfadingawayofmanthatisbornofawomanandhathbutashorttimetolive。
Inhispresentationofhisfather’smoralnatureandintellectualqualities，MrHuntisnolessfaithfulandnolesstouching。ThosewhoknewLeighHunt，willseethebrightfaceandhearthemusicalvoiceagain，whenheisrecalledtotheminthispassage："Evenatseasonsofthegreatestdepressioninhisfortunes，healwaysattractedmanyvisitors，butstillnotsomuchforanyreputethatattendedhimasforhispersonalqualities。Fewmenweremoreattractive，insociety，whetherinalargecompanyoroverthefireside。Hismannerswerepeculiarlyanimated；hisconversation，varied，rangingoveragreatfieldofsubjects，wasmovedandcalledforthbytheresponseofhiscompanion，bethatcompanionphilosopherorstudent，sageorboy，manorwoman；andhewasequallyreadyforthemostlivelytopicsorforthegravestreflections——hisexpressioneasilyadaptingitselftothetoneofhiscompanion’smind。Withmuchfreedomofmanners，hecombinedaspontaneouscourtesythatneverfailed，andaconsideratenessderivedfromaceaselesskindnessofheartthatinvariablyfascinatedevenstrangers。"Orinthis："Hisanimation，hissympathywithwhatwasgayandpleasurable；hisavoweddoctrineofcultivatingcheerfulness，weremanifestonthesurface，andcouldbeappreciatedbythosewhoknewhiminsociety，mostprobablyevenexaggeratedassalienttraits，onwhichhehimselfinsistedWITHA
SORTOFGAYANDOSTENTATIOUSWILFULNESS。"
Thelastwordsdescribeoneofthemostcaptivatingpeculiaritiesofamostoriginalandengagingman，betterthananyotherwordscould。
Thereaderisbesoughttoobservethem，forareasonthatshallpresentlybegiven。Lastly："Theanxietytorecognisetherightofothers，thetendencyto’refine’，whichwasnotedbyanearlyschoolcompanion，andthepropensitytoelaborateeverythought，madehim，alongwiththedirectargumentbywhichhesustainedhisownconviction，recogniseandalmostadmitallthatmightbesaidontheoppositeside"。Forthesereasons，andforotherssuggestedwithequalfelicity，andwithequalfidelity，thesonwritesofthefather，"Itismostdesirablethathisqualitiesshouldbeknownastheywere；forsuchdeficienciesashehadarethehonestexplanationofhismistakes；while，asthereadermayseefromhiswritingsandhisconduct，theyarenot，asthefaultsofwhichhewasaccusedwouldbe，incompatiblewiththenoblestfacultiesbothofheadandheart。ToknowLeighHuntashewas，wastoholdhiminreverenceandlove。"
Thesequotationsaremadehere，withaspecialobject。Itisnot，thatthepersonaltestimonyofonewhoknewLeighHuntwell，maybebornetotheirtruthfulness。Itisnot，thatitmayberecordedinthesepages，asinhisson’sintroductorychapter，thathislifewasofthemostamiableanddomestickind，thathiswantswerefew，thathiswayoflifewasfrugal，thathewasamanofsmallexpenses，noostentations，adiligentlabourer，andasecludedmanofletters。
Itisnot，thattheinconsiderateandforgetfulmayberemindedofhiswrongsandsufferingsinthedaysoftheRegency，andofthenationaldisgraceofhisimprisonment。Itisnot，thattheirforbearancemaybeentreatedforhisgrave，inrightofhisgracefulfancyorhispoliticallaboursandendurances，though—
Notonlywe，thelatestseedofTime，Newmen，thatintheflyingofawheelCrydownthepast，notonlywe，thatprateOfrightsandwrongs，havelovedthepeoplewell。
Itis，thatadutymaybedoneinthemostdirectwaypossible。Anactofplain，clearduty。
Fourorfiveyearsago，thewriteroftheselineswasmuchpainedbyaccidentallyencounteringaprintedstatement，"thatMr。LeighHuntwastheoriginalofHaroldSkimpoleinBleakHouse"。Thewriteroftheselines，istheauthorofthatbook。ThestatementcamefromAmerica。Itisnodisrespecttothatcountry，inwhichthewriterhas，perhaps，asmanyfriendsandastrueaninterestasanymanthatlives，good—humouredlytostatethefact，thathehas，nowandthen，beenthesubjectofparagraphsinTransatlanticnewspapers，moresurprisinglydestituteofallfoundationintruththanthewildestdelusionsofthewildestlunatics。Forreasonsbornofthisexperience，heletthethinggoby。
But，sinceMr。LeighHunt’sdeath，thestatementhasbeenrevivedinEngland。Thedelicacyandgenerosityevincedinitsrevival，arefortheratherlateconsiderationofitsrevivers。Thefactisthis：
Exactlythosegracesandcharmsofmannerwhicharerememberedinthewordswehavequoted，wererememberedbytheauthoroftheworkoffictioninquestion，whenhedrewthecharacterinquestion。
Aboveallotherthings，that"sortofgayandostentatiouswilfulness"inthehumouringofasubject，whichhadmanyatimedelightedhim，andimpressedhimasbeingunspeakablywhimsicalandattractive，wastheairyqualityhewantedforthemanheinvented。
Partlyforthisreason，andpartly（hehassinceoftengrievedtothink）forthepleasureitaffordedhimtofindthatdelightfulmannerreproducingitselfunderhishand，heyieldedtothetemptationoftoooftenmakingthecharacterSPEAKlikehisoldfriend。Henomorethought，Godforgivehim!thattheadmiredoriginalwouldeverbechargedwiththeimaginaryvicesofthefictitiouscreature，thanhehashimselfeverthoughtofchargingthebloodofDesdemonaandOthello，ontheinnocentAcademymodelwhosatforIago’sleginthepicture。Evenastothemereoccasionalmanner，hemeanttobesocautiousandconscientious，thatheprivatelyreferredtheproofsheetsofthefirstnumberofthatbooktotwointimateliteraryfriendsofLeighHunt（bothstillliving），andalteredthewholeofthatpartofthetextontheirdiscoveringtoostrongaresemblancetohis"way"。
Hecannotseethesonlaythiswreathonthefather’stomb，andleavehimtothepossibilityofeverthinkingthatthepresentwordsmighthaverightedthefather’smemoryandwereleftunwritten。Hecannotknowthathisownsonmayhavetoexplainhisfatherwhenfollyormalicecanwoundhisheartnomore，andleavethistaskundone。
THETATTLESNIVELBLEATER
Thepenistakeninhandonthepresentoccasion，byaprivateindividual（notwhollyunaccustomedtoliterarycomposition），fortheexposureofaconspiracyofamostfrightfulnature；aconspiracywhich，likethedeadlyUpas—treeofJava，onwhichtheindividualproducedapoeminhisearlieryouth（notwhollydevoidoflength），whichwassoflatteringlyreceived（incirclesnotwhollyunaccustomedtoformcriticalopinions），thathewasrecommendedtopublishit，andwouldcertainlyhavecarriedoutthesuggestion，butforprivateconsiderations（notwhollyunconnectedwithexpense）。
Theindividualwhoundertakestheexposureofthegiganticconspiracynowtobelaidbareinallitshideousdeformity，isaninhabitantofthetownofTattlesnivel——alowlyinhabitant，itmaybe，butonewho，asanEnglishmanandaman，willne’erabasehiseyebeforethegaudyandthemockingthrong。