`IfTHATdoesn’t"drumthemoutoftown，"’shethoughttoherself，’nothingeverwill!’
　　CHAPTERVIII
　　`It’smyownInvention’
　　Afterawhilethenoiseseemedgraduallytodieaway，tillallwasdeadsilence，andAliceliftedupherheadinsomealarm。
　　Therewasnoonetobeseen，andherfirstthoughtwasthatshemusthavebeendreamingabouttheLionandtheUnicornandthosestilllyingatherfeet，onwhichshehadtriedtocuttheplum—
　　cake，`SoIwasn’tdreaming，afterall，’shesaidtoherself，`unless——unlesswe’reallpartofthesamedream。OnlyIdohopeit’sMYdream，andnottheRedKing’s!Idon’tlikebelongingtoanotherperson’sdream，’shewentoninarathercomplainingtone：`I’veagreatmindtogoandwakehim，andseewhathappens!’
　　Atthismomentherthoughtswereinterruptedbyaloudshoutingof`Ahoy!Ahoy!Check!’andaKnightdressedincrimsonarmourcamegallopingdownuponher，brandishingagreatclub。Justashereachedher，thehorsestoppedsuddenly：`You’remyprisoner!’theKnightcried，ashetumbledoffhishorse。
　　Startledasshewas，Alicewasmorefrightenedforhimthanforherselfatthemoment，andwatchedhimwithsomeanxietyashemountedagain。Assoonashewascomfortablyinthesaddle，hebeganoncemore`You’remy——’buthereanothervoicebrokein`Ahoy!Ahoy!Check!’andAlicelookedroundinsomesurpriseforthenewenemy。
　　ThistimeitwasaWhiteKnight。HedrewupatAlice’sside，andtumbledoffhishorsejustastheRedKnighthaddone：thenhegotonagain，andthetwoKnightssatandlookedateachotherforsometimewithoutspeaking。Alicelookedfromonetotheotherinsomebewilderment。
　　`She’sMYprisoner，youknow!’theRedKnightsaidatlast。
　　`Yes，butthen_I_cameandrescuedher!’theWhiteKnightreplied。
　　`Well，wemustfightforher，then，’saidtheRedKnight，ashetookuphishelmet（whichhungfromthesaddle，andwassomethingtheshapeofahorse’shead），andputiton。
　　`YouwillobservetheRulesofBattle，ofcourse？’theWhiteKnightremarked，puttingonhishelmettoo。
　　`Ialwaysdo，’saidtheRedKnight，andtheybeganbangingawayateachotherwithsuchfurythatAlicegotbehindatreetobeoutofthewayoftheblows。
　　`Iwonder，now，whattheRulesofBattleare，’shesaidtoherself，asshewatchedthefight，timidlypeepingoutfromherhiding—place：`oneRuleseemstobe，thatifoneKnighthitstheother，heknockshimoffhishorse，andifhemisses，hetumblesoffhimself——andanotherRuleseemstobethattheyholdtheirclubswiththeirarms，asiftheywerePunchandJudy——Whatanoisetheymakewhentheytumble!Justlikeawholesetoffire—
　　ironsfallingintothefender!Andhowquietthehorsesare!
　　Theyletthemgetonandoffthemjustasiftheyweretables!’
　　AnotherRuleofBattle，thatAlicehadnotnoticed，seemedtobethattheyalwaysfellontheirheads，andthebattleendedwiththeirbothfallingoffinthisway，sidebyside：whentheygotupagain，theyshookhands，andthentheRedKnightmountedandgallopedoff。
　　`Itwasagloriousvictory，wasn’tit？’saidtheWhiteKnight，ashecameuppanting。
　　`Idon’tknow，’Alicesaiddoubtfully。`Idon’twanttobeanybody’sprisoner。IwanttobeaQueen。’
　　`Soyouwill，whenyou’vecrossedthenextbrook，’saidtheWhiteKnight。`I’llseeyousafetotheendofthewood——andthenImustgoback，youknow。That’stheendofmymove。’
　　`Thankyouverymuch，’saidAlice。`MayIhelpyouoffwithyourhelmet？’Itwasevidentlymorethanhecouldmanagebyhimself；however，shemanagedtoshakehimoutofitatlast。
　　`Nowonecanbreathemoreeasily，’saidtheKnight，puttingbackhisshaggyhairwithbothhands，andturninghisgentlefaceandlargemildeyestoAlice。Shethoughtshehadneverseensuchastrange—lookingsoldierinallherlife。
　　Hewasdressedintinarmour，whichseemedtofithimverybadly，andhehadaqueer—shapedlittledealboxfastenedacrosshisshoulder，upside—down，andwiththelidhangingopen。Alicelookedatitwithgreatcuriosity。
　　`Iseeyou’readmiringmylittlebox。’theKnightsaidinafriendlytone。`It’smyowninvention——tokeepclothesandsandwichesin。YouseeIcarryitupside—down，sothattheraincan’tgetin。’
　　`ButthethingscangetOUT，’Alicegentlyremarked。`Doyouknowthelid’sopen？’
　　`Ididn’tknowit，’theKnightsaid，ashadeofvexationpassingoverhisface。`Thenallthethingsmuchhavefallenout!Andtheboxisnousewithoutthem。’Heunfasteneditashespoke，andwasjustgoingtothrowitintothebushes，whenasuddenthoughtseemedtostrikehim，andhehungitcarefullyonatree。`CanyouguesswhyIdidthat？’hesaidtoAlice。
　　Aliceshookherhead。
　　`Inhopessomebeesmaymakeanestinit——thenIshouldgetthehoney。’
　　`Butyou’vegotabee—hive——orsomethinglikeone——fastenedtothesaddle，’saidAlice。
　　`Yes，it’saverygoodbee—hive，’theKnightsaidinadiscontentedtone，`oneofthebestkind。Butnotasinglebeehascomenearityet。Andtheotherthingisamouse—trap。I
　　supposethemicekeepthebeesout——orthebeeskeepthemiceout，Idon’tknowwhich。’
　　`Iwaswonderingwhatthemouse—trapwasfor，’saidAlice。`Itisn’tverylikelytherewouldbeanymiceonthehorse’sback。’
　　`Notverylikely，perhaps，’saidtheKnight：`butiftheyDO
　　come，Idon’tchoosetohavethemrunningallabout。’
　　`Yousee，’hewentonafterapause，`it’saswelltobeprovidedforEVERYTHING。That’sthereasonthehorsehasallthoseankletsroundhisfeet。’
　　`Butwhataretheyfor？’Aliceaskedinatoneofgreatcuriosity。
　　`Toguardagainstthebitesofsharks，’theKnightreplied。
　　`It’saninventionofmyown。Andnowhelpmeon。I’llgowithyoutotheendofthewood——What’sthedishfor？’
　　`It’smeantforplum—cake，’saidAlice。
　　`We’dbettertakeitwithus，’theKnightsaid。`It’llcomeinhandyifwefindanyplum—cake。Helpmetogetitintothisbag。’
　　Thistookaverylongtimetomanage，thoughAliceheldthebagopenverycarefully，becausetheKnightwassoVERYawkwardinputtinginthedish：thefirsttwoorthreetimesthathetriedhefellinhimselfinstead。`It’sratheratightfit，yousee，’hesaid，astheygotitinalast；`Therearesomanycandlesticksinthebag。’Andhehungittothesaddle，whichwasalreadyloadedwithbunchesofcarrots，andfire—irons，andmanyotherthings。
　　`Ihopeyou’vegotyourhairwellfastenedon？’hecontinued，astheysetoff。
　　`Onlyintheusualway，’Alicesaid，smiling。
　　`That’shardlyenough，’hesaid，anxiously。`YouseethewindissoVERYstronghere。It’sasstrongassoup。’
　　`Haveyouinventedaplanforkeepingthehairfrombeingblownoff？’Aliceenquired。
　　`Notyet，’saidtheKnight。`ButI’vegotaplanforkeepingitfromFALLINGoff。’
　　`Ishouldliketohearit，verymuch。’
　　`Firstyoutakeanuprightstick，’saidtheKnight。`Thenyoumakeyourhaircreepupit，likeafruit—tree。NowthereasonhairfallsoffisbecauseithangsDOWN——thingsneverfallUPWARDS，youknow。It’saplanofmyowninvention。Youmaytryitifyoulike。’
　　Itdidn’tsoundacomfortableplan，Alicethought，andforafewminutesshewalkedoninsilence，puzzlingovertheidea，andeverynowandthenstoppingtohelpthepoorKnight，whocertainlywasNOTagoodrider。
　　Wheneverthehorsestopped（whichitdidveryoften），hefelloffinfront；andwheneveritwentonagain（whichitgenerallydidrathersuddenly），hefelloffbehind。Otherwisehekeptonprettywell，exceptthathehadahabitofnowandthenfallingoffsideways；andashegenerallydidthisonthesideonwhichAlicewaswalking，shesoonfoundthatitwasthebestplannottowalkQUITEclosetothehorse。
　　`I’mafraidyou’venothadmuchpracticeinriding，’sheventuredtosay，asshewashelpinghimupfromhisfifthtumble。
　　TheKnightlookedverymuchsurprised，andalittleoffendedattheremark。`Whatmakesyousaythat？’heasked，ashescrambledbackintothesaddle，keepingholdofAlice’shairwithonehand，tosavehimselffromfallingoverontheotherside。
　　`Becausepeopledon’tfalloffquitesooften，whenthey’vehadmuchpractice。’
　　`I’vehadplentyofpractice，’theKnightsaidverygravely：
　　`plentyofpractice!’
　　Alicecouldthinkofnothingbettertosaythan`Indeed？’butshesaiditasheartilyasshecould。Theywentonalittlewayinsilenceafterthis，theKnightwithhiseyesshut，mutteringtohimself，andAlicewatchinganxiouslyforthenexttumble。
　　`Thegreatartofriding，’theKnightsuddenlybeganinaloudvoice，wavinghisrightarmashespoke，`istokeep——’Herethesentenceendedassuddenlyasithadbegun，astheKnightfellheavilyonthetopofhisheadexactlyinthepathwhereAlicewaswalking。Shewasquitefrightenedthistime，andsaidinananxioustone，asshepickedhimup，`Ihopenobonesarebroken？’
　　`Nonetospeakof，’theKnightsaid，asifhedidn’tmindbreakingtwoorthreeofthem。`Thegreatartofriding，asIwassaying，is——tokeepyourbalanceproperly。Likethis，youknow——’
　　Heletgothebridle，andstretchedoutbothhisarmstoshowAlicewhathemeant，andthistimehefellflatonhisback，rightunderthehorse’sfeet。
　　`Plentyofpractice!’hewentonrepeating，allthetimethatAlicewasgettinghimonhisfeetagain。`Plentyofpractice!’
　　`It’stooridiculous!’criedAlice，losingallherpatiencethistime。
　　`Yououghttohaveawoodenhorseonwheels，thatyouought!’
　　`Doesthatkindgosmoothly？’theKnightaskedinatoneofgreatinterest，claspinghisarmsroundthehorse’sneckashespoke，justintimetosavehimselffromtumblingoffagain。
　　`Muchmoresmoothlythanalivehorse，’Alicesaid，withalittlescreamoflaughter，inspiteofallshecoulddotopreventit。
　　`I’llgetone，’theKnightsaidthoughtfullytohimself。`Oneortwo——several。’
　　Therewasashortsilenceafterthis，andthentheKnightwentonagain。`I’magreathandatinventingthings。Now，Idaresayyounoticed，thatlasttimeyoupickedmeup，thatIwaslookingratherthoughtful？’
　　`YouWEREalittlegrave，’saidAlice。
　　`Well，justthenIwasinventinganewwayofgettingoveragate——wouldyouliketohearit？’
　　`Verymuchindeed，’Alicesaidpolitely。
　　`I’lltellyouhowIcametothinkofit，’saidtheKnight。
　　`Yousee，Isaidtomyself，"Theonlydifficultyiswiththefeet：theHEADishighenoughalready。"Now，firstIputmyheadonthetopofthegate——thenIstandonmyhead——thenthefeetarehighenough，yousee——thenI’mover，yousee。’
　　`Yes，Isupposeyou’dbeoverwhenthatwasdone，’Alicesaidthoughtfully：`butdon’tyouthinkitwouldberatherhard？’
　　`Ihaven’ttriedityet，’theKnightsaid，gravely：`soIcan’ttellforcertain——butI’mafraiditWOULDbealittlehard。’
　　Helookedsovexedattheidea，thatAlicechangedthesubjecthastily。`Whatacurioushelmetyou’vegot!’shesaidcheerfully。
　　`Isthatyourinventiontoo？’
　　TheKnightlookeddownproudlyathishelmet，whichhungfromthesaddle。`Yes，’hesaid，`butI’veinventedabetteronethanthat——likeasugarloaf。WhenIusedtowearit，ifIfelloffthehorse，italwaystouchedthegrounddirectly。SoIhadaVERYlittlewaytofall，yousee——ButthereWASthedangeroffallingINTOit，tobesure。Thathappenedtomeonce——andtheworstofitwas，beforeIcouldgetoutagain，theotherWhiteKnightcameandputiton。Hethoughtitwashisownhelmet。’
　　TheknightlookedsosolemnaboutitthatAlicedidnotdaretolaugh。`I’mafraidyoumusthavehurthim，’shesaidinatremblingvoice，`beingonthetopofhishead。’
　　`Ihadtokickhim，ofcourse，’theKnightsaid，veryseriously。
　　`Andthenhetookthehelmetoffagain——butittookhoursandhourstogetmeout。Iwasasfastas——aslightning，youknow。’
　　`Butthat’sadifferentkindoffastness，’Aliceobjected。
　　TheKnightshookhishead。`Itwasallkindsoffastnesswithme，Icanassureyou!’hesaid。Heraisedhishandsinsomeexcitementashesaidthis，andinstantlyrolledoutofthesaddle，andfellheadlongintoadeepditch。
　　Alicerantothesideoftheditchtolookforhim。Shewasratherstartledbythefall，asforsometimehehadkeptonverywell，andshewasafraidthathereallyWAShurtthistime。
　　However，thoughshecouldseenothingbutthesolesofhisfeet，shewasmuchrelievedtohearthathewastalkingoninhisusualtone。`Allkindsoffastness，’herepeated：`butitwascarelessofhimtoputanotherman’shelmeton——withthemaninit，too。’
　　`HowCANyougoontalkingsoquietly，headdownwards？’Aliceasked，asshedraggedhimoutbythefeet，andlaidhiminaheaponthebank。
　　TheKnightlookedsurprisedatthequestion。`Whatdoesitmatterwheremybodyhappenstobe？’hesaid。`Mymindgoesonworkingallthesame。Infact，themoreheaddownwardsIam，themoreIkeepinventingnewthings。’
　　`NowthecleverestthingofthesortthatIeverdid，’hewentonafterapause，`wasinventinganewpuddingduringthemeat—
　　course。’
　　`Intimetohaveitcookedforthenextcourse？’saidAlice。
　　`Well，nottheNEXTcourse，’theKnightsaidinaslowthoughtfultone：`no，certainlynotthenextCOURSE。’
　　`Thenitwouldhavetobethenextday。Isupposeyouwouldn’thavetwopudding—coursesinonedinner？’
　　`Well，nottheNEXTday，’theKnightrepeatedasbefore：`notthenextDAY。Infact，’hewenton，holdinghisheaddown，andhisvoicegettinglowerandlower，`Idon’tbelievethatpuddingeverWAScooked!Infact，Idon’tbelievethatpuddingeverWILL
　　becooked!Andyetitwasaverycleverpuddingtoinvent。’
　　`Whatdidyoumeanittobemadeof？’Aliceasked，hopingtocheerhimup，forthepoorKnightseemedquitelow—spiritedaboutit。
　　`Itbeganwithblottingpaper，’theKnightansweredwithagroan。
　　`Thatwouldn’tbeverynice，I’mafraid——’
　　`NotveryniceALONE，’heinterrupted，quiteeagerly：`butyou’venoideawhatadifferenceitmakesmixingitwithotherthings——suchasgunpowderandsealing—wax。AndhereImustleaveyou。’Theyhadjustcometotheendofthewood。
　　Alicecouldonlylookpuzzled：shewasthinkingofthepudding。
　　`Youaresad，’theKnightsaidinananxioustone：`letmesingyouasongtocomfortyou。’
　　`Isitverylong？’Aliceasked，forshehadheardagooddealofpoetrythatday。
　　`It’slong，’saidtheKnight，`butvery，VERYbeautiful。
　　Everybodythathearsmesingit——eitheritbringstheTEARS
　　intotheireyes，orelse——’
　　`Orelsewhat？’saidAlice，fortheKnighthadmadeasuddenpause。
　　`Orelseitdoesn’t，youknow。Thenameofthesongiscalled"HADDOCKS’EYES。"’
　　`Oh，that’sthenameofthesong，isit？’Alicesaid，tryingtofeelinterested。
　　`No，youdon’tunderstand，’theKnightsaid，lookingalittlevexed。`That’swhatthenameisCALLED。ThenamereallyIS"THE
　　AGEDAGEDMAN。"’
　　`ThenIoughttohavesaid"That’swhattheSONGiscalled"？’
　　Alicecorrectedherself。
　　`No，yououghtn’t：that’squiteanotherthing!TheSONGiscalled"WAYSANDMEANS"：butthat’sonlywhatit’sCALLED，youknow!’
　　`Well，whatISthesong，then？’saidAlice，whowasbythistimecompletelybewildered。
　　`Iwascomingtothat，’theKnightsaid。`ThesongreallyIS
　　"A—SITTINGONAGATE"：andthetune’smyowninvention。’
　　Sosaying，hestoppedhishorseandletthereinsfallonitsneck：then，slowlybeatingtimewithonehand，andwithafaintsmilelightinguphisgentlefoolishface，asifheenjoyedthemusicofhissong，hebegan。
　　OfallthestrangethingsthatAlicesawinherjourneyThroughTheLooking—Glass，thiswastheonethatshealwaysrememberedmostclearly。Yearsafterwardsshecouldbringthewholescenebackagain，asifithadbeenonlyyesterday——themildblueeyesandkindlysmileoftheKnight——thesettingsungleamingthroughhishair，andshiningonhisarmourinablazeoflightthatquitedazzledher——thehorsequietlymovingabout，withthereinshanginglooseonhisneck，croppingthegrassatherfeet——andtheblackshadowsoftheforestbehind——allthisshetookinlikeapicture，as，withonehandshadinghereyes，sheleantagainstatree，watchingthestrangepair，andlistening，inahalfdream，tothemelancholymusicofthesong。
　　`ButthetuneISN’Thisowninvention，’shesaidtoherself：
　　`it’s"IGIVETHEEALL，ICANNOMORE。"’Shestoodandlistenedveryattentively，butnotearscameintohereyes。
　　`I’lltelltheeeverythingIcan；
　　There’slittletorelate。
　　Isawanagedagedman，A—sittingonagate。
　　"Whoareyou，agedman？"Isaid，"andhowisityoulive？"
　　AndhisanswertrickledthroughmyheadLikewaterthroughasieve。
　　Hesaid"IlookforbutterfliesThatsleepamongthewheat：
　　Imakethemintomutton—pies，Andselltheminthestreet。
　　Isellthemuntomen，"hesaid，"Whosailonstormyseas；
　　Andthat’sthewayIgetmybread——
　　Atrifle，ifyouplease。"
　　ButIwasthinkingofaplanTodyeone’swhiskersgreen，AndalwaysusesolargeafanThattheycouldnotbeseen。
　　So，havingnoreplytogiveTowhattheoldmansaid，Icried，"Come，tellmehowyoulive!"
　　Andthumpedhimonthehead。
　　Hisaccentsmildtookupthetale：
　　Hesaid"Igomyways，AndwhenIfindamountain—rill，Isetitinablaze；
　　AndthencetheymakeastufftheycallRolands’MacassarOil——
　　Yettwopence—halfpennyisallTheygivemeformytoil。"
　　ButIwasthinkingofawayTofeedoneselfonbatter，AndsogoonfromdaytodayGettingalittlefatter。
　　Ishookhimwellfromsidetoside，Untilhisfacewasblue：
　　"Come，tellmehowyoulive，"Icried，"Andwhatitisyoudo!"
　　Hesaid"Ihuntforhaddocks’eyesAmongtheheatherbright，Andworkthemintowaistcoat—buttonsInthesilentnight。
　　AndtheseIdonotsellforgoldOrcoinofsilveryshineButforacopperhalfpenny，Andthatwillpurchasenine。
　　"Isometimesdigforbutteredrolls，Orsetlimedtwigsforcrabs；
　　IsometimessearchthegrassyknollsForwheelsofHansom—cabs。
　　Andthat’stheway"（hegaveawink）
　　"BywhichIgetmywealth——
　　AndverygladlywillIdrinkYourHonour’snoblehealth。"
　　Iheardhimthen，forIhadjustCompletedmydesignTokeeptheMenaibridgefromrustByboilingitinwine。
　　IthankedmuchfortellingmeThewayhegothiswealth，ButchieflyforhiswishthatheMightdrinkmynoblehealth。
　　Andnow，ife’erbychanceIputMyfingersintoglueOrmadlysqueezearight—handfootIntoaleft—handshoe，OrifIdropuponmytoeAveryheavyweight，Iweep，foritremindsmeso，OfthatoldmanIusedtoknow——
　　Whoselookwasmild，whosespeechwasslow，Whosehairwaswhiterthanthesnow，Whosefacewasverylikeacrow，Witheyes，likecinders，allaglow，Whoseemeddistractedwithhiswoe，Whorockedhisbodytoandfro，Andmutteredmumblinglyandlow，Asifhismouthwerefullofdough，Whosnortedlikeabuffalo——Thatsummerevening，longago，A—sittingonagate。’
　　AstheKnightsangthelastwordsoftheballad，hegatheredupthereins，andturnedhishorse’sheadalongtheroadbywhichtheyhadcome。`You’veonlyafewyardstogo，’hesaid，’downthehillandoverthatlittlebrook，andthenyou’llbeaQueen——
　　Butyou’llstayandseemeofffirst？’headdedasAliceturnedwithaneagerlookinthedirectiontowhichhepointed。`I
　　shan’tbelong。You’llwaitandwaveyourhandkerchiefwhenI
　　gettothatturnintheroad？Ithinkit’llencourageme，yousee。’
　　`OfcourseI’llwait，’saidAlice：`andthankyouverymuchforcomingsofar——andforthesong——Ilikeditverymuch。’
　　`Ihopeso，’theKnightsaiddoubtfully：`butyoudidn’tcrysomuchasIthoughtyouwould。’
　　Sotheyshookhands，andthentheKnightrodeslowlyawayintotheforest。`Itwon’ttakelongtoseehimOFF，Iexpect，’
　　Alicesaidtoherself，asshestoodwatchinghim。`Therehegoes!Rightonhisheadasusual!However，hegetsonagainprettyeasily——thatcomesofhavingsomanythingshungroundthehorse——’Soshewentontalkingtoherself，asshewatchedthehorsewalkingleisurelyalongtheroad，andtheKnighttumblingoff，firstononesideandthenontheother。Afterthefourthorfifthtumblehereachedtheturn，andthenshewavedherhandkerchieftohim，andwaitedtillhewasoutofsight。
　　`Ihopeitencouragedhim，’shesaid，assheturnedtorundownthehill：`andnowforthelastbrook，andtobeaQueen!
　　Howgranditsounds!’Averyfewstepsbroughthertotheedgeofthebrook。`TheEighthSquareatlast!’shecriedassheboundedacross，*******
　　******
　　*******
　　andthrewherselfdowntorestonalawnassoftasmoss，withlittleflower—bedsdottedaboutithereandthere。`Oh，howgladIamtogethere!AndwhatISthisonmyhead？’sheexclaimedinatoneofdismay，assheputherhandsuptosomethingveryheavy，andfittedtightallroundherhead。
　　`ButhowCANithavegottherewithoutmyknowingit？’shesaidtoherself，asshelifteditoff，andsetitonherlaptomakeoutwhatitcouldpossiblybe。
　　Itwasagoldencrown。
　　CHAPTERIX
　　QueenAlice`Well，thisISgrand!’saidAlice。`IneverexpectedIshouldbeaQueensosoon——andI’lltellyouwhatitis，yourmajesty，’shewentoninaseveretone（shewasalwaysratherfondofscoldingherself），`it’llneverdoforyoutobelollingaboutonthegrasslikethat!Queenshavetobedignified，youknow!’
　　Soshegotupandwalkedabout——ratherstifflyjustatfirst，asshewasafraidthatthecrownmightcomeoff：butshecomfortedherselfwiththethoughtthattherewasnobodytoseeher，`andifIreallyamaQueen，’shesaidasshesatdownagain，`Ishallbeabletomanageitquitewellintime。’
　　Everythingwashappeningsooddlythatshedidn’tfeelabitsurprisedatfindingtheRedQueenandtheWhiteQueensittingclosetoher，oneoneachside：shewouldhavelikedverymuchtoaskthemhowtheycamethere，butshefeareditwouldnotbequitecivil。However，therewouldbenoharm，shethought，inaskingifthegamewasover。`Please，wouldyoutellme——’shebegan，lookingtimidlyattheRedQueen。
　　`Speakwhenyou’respokento!’TheQueensharplyinterruptedher。
　　`Butifeverybodyobeyedthatrule，’saidAlice，whowasalwaysreadyforalittleargument，`andifyouonlyspokewhenyouwerespokento，andtheotherpersonalwayswaitedforYOUtobegin，youseenobodywouldeversayanything，sothat——’
　　`Ridiculous!’criedtheQueen。`Why，don’tyousee，child——’
　　hereshebrokeoffwithafrown，and，afterthinkingforaminute，suddenlychangedthesubjectoftheconversation。`Whatdoyoumeanby"IfyoureallyareaQueen"？Whatrighthaveyoutocallyourselfso？Youcan’tbeaQueen，youknow，tillyou’vepassedtheproperexamination。Andthesoonerwebeginit，thebetter。’
　　`Ionlysaid"if"!’poorAlicepleadedinapiteoustone。
　　ThetwoQueenslookedateachother，andtheRedQueenremarked，withalittleshudder，`SheSAYSsheonlysaid"if"——’
　　`Butshesaidagreatdealmorethanthat!’theWhiteQueenmoaned，wringingherhands。`Oh，eversomuchmorethanthat!’
　　`Soyoudid，youknow，’theRedQueensaidtoAlice。`Alwaysspeakthetruth——thinkbeforeyouspeak——andwriteitdownafterwards。’
　　`I’msureIdidn’tmean——’Alicewasbeginning，buttheRedQueeninterruptedherimpatiently。
　　`That’sjustwhatIcomplainof!YouSHOULDhavemeant!Whatdoyousupposeistheuseofchildwithoutanymeaning？Evenajokeshouldhavesomemeaning——andachild’smoreimportantthanajoke，Ihope。Youcouldn’tdenythat，evenifyoutriedwithbothhands。’
　　`Idon’tdenythingswithmyHANDS，’Aliceobjected。
　　`Nobodysaidyoudid，’saidtheRedQueen。`Isaidyoucouldn’tifyoutried。’
　　`She’sinthatstateofmind，’saidtheWhiteQueen，`thatshewantstodenySOMETHING——onlyshedoesn’tknowwhattodeny!’
　　`Anasty，vicioustemper，’theRedQueenremarked；andthentherewasanuncomfortablesilenceforaminuteortwo。
　　TheRedQueenbrokethesilencebysayingtotheWhiteQueen，`IinviteyoutoAlice’sdinner—partythisafternoon。’
　　TheWhiteQueensmiledfeebly，andsaid`AndIinviteYOU。’
　　`Ididn’tknowIwastohaveapartyatall，’saidAlice；`butifthereistobeone，Ithink_I_oughttoinvitetheguests。’
　　`Wegaveyoutheopportunityofdoingit，’theRedQueenremarked：`butIdaresayyou’venothadmanylessonsinmannersyet？’
　　`Mannersarenottaughtinlessons，’saidAlice。`Lessonsteachyoutodosums，andthingsofthatsort。’
　　`AndyoudoAddition？’theWhiteQueenasked。`What’soneandoneandoneandoneandoneandoneandoneandoneandoneandone？’
　　`Idon’tknow，’saidAlice。`Ilostcount。’
　　`Shecan’tdoAddition，’theRedQueeninterrupted。
　　`CanyoudoSubtraction？Takeninefromeight。’
　　`NinefromeightIcan’t，youknow，’Alicerepliedveryreadily：
　　`but——’
　　`Shecan’tdoSubtraction，’saidtheWhiteQueen。`CanyoudoDivision？Dividealoafbyaknife——what’stheanswertothat？’
　　`Isuppose——’Alicewasbeginning，buttheRedQueenansweredforher。`Bread—and—butter，ofcourse。TryanotherSubtractionsum。Takeabonefromadog：whatremains？’
　　Aliceconsidered。`Thebonewouldn’tremain，ofcourse，ifI
　　tookit——andthedogwouldn’tremain；itwouldcometobiteme——andI’msureIshouldn’tremain!’
　　`Thenyouthinknothingwouldremain？’saidtheRedQueen。
　　`Ithinkthat’stheanswer。’
　　`Wrong，asusual，’saidtheRedQueen：`thedog’stemperwouldremain。’
　　`ButIdon’tseehow——’
　　`Why，lookhere!’theRedQueencried。`Thedogwouldloseitstemper，wouldn’tit？’
　　`Perhapsitwould，’Alicerepliedcautiously。
　　`Thenifthedogwentaway，itstemperwouldremain!’theQueenexclaimedtriumphantly。
　　Alicesaid，asgravelyasshecould，`Theymightgodifferentways。’Butshecouldn’thelpthinkingtoherself，`WhatdreadfulnonsenseweAREtalking!’
　　`Shecan’tdosumsaBIT!’theQueenssaidtogether，withgreatemphasis。
　　`CanYOUdosums？’Alicesaid，turningsuddenlyontheWhiteQueen，forshedidn’tlikebeingfoundfaultwithsomuch。
　　TheQueengaspedandshuthereyes。`IcandoAddition，’`ifyougivemetime——butIcandoSubtraction，underANY
　　circumstances!’
　　`OfcourseyouknowyourABC？’saidtheRedQueen。
　　`TobesureIdo。’saidAlice。
　　`SodoI，’theWhiteQueenwhispered：`we’lloftensayitovertogether，dear。AndI’lltellyouasecret——Icanreadwordsofoneletter!Isn’tTHATgrand!However，don’tbediscouraged。
　　You’llcometoitintime。’
　　HeretheRedQueenbeganagain。`Canyouanswerusefulquestions？’shesaid。`Howisbreadmade？’
　　`IknowTHAT!’Alicecriedeagerly。`Youtakesomeflour——’
　　`Wheredoyoupicktheflower？’theWhiteQueenasked。`Inagarden，orinthehedges？’
　　`Well，itisn’tPICKEDatall，’Aliceexplained：`it’sGROUND
　　——’
　　`Howmanyacresofground？’saidtheWhiteQueen。`Youmustn’tleaveoutsomanythings。’
　　`Fanherhead!’theRedQueenanxiouslyinterrupted。`She’llbefeverishaftersomuchthinking。’Sotheysettoworkandfannedherwithbunchesofleaves，tillshehadtobegthemtoleaveoff，itblewherhairaboutso。
　　`She’sallrightagainnow，’saidtheRedQueen。`DoyouknowLanguages？What’stheFrenchforfiddle—de—dee？’
　　`Fiddle—de—dee’snotEnglish，’Alicerepliedgravely。
　　`Whoeversaiditwas？’saidtheRedQueen。
　　Alicethoughtshesawawayoutofthedifficultythistime。
　　`Ifyou’lltellmewhatlanguage"fiddle—de—dee"is，I’lltellyoutheFrenchforit!’sheexclaimedtriumphantly。
　　ButtheRedQueendrewherselfupratherstiffly，andsaid`Queensnevermakebargains。’
　　`IwishQueensneveraskedquestions，’Alicethoughttoherself。
　　`Don’tletusquarrel，’theWhiteQueensaidinananxioustone。`Whatisthecauseoflightning？’
　　`Thecauseoflightning，’Alicesaidverydecidedly，forshefeltquitecertainaboutthis，`isthethunder——no，no!’shehastilycorrectedherself。`Imeanttheotherway。’
　　`It’stoolatetocorrectit，’saidtheRedQueen：`whenyou’veoncesaidathing，thatfixesit，andyoumusttaketheconsequences。’
　　`Whichremindsme——’theWhiteQueensaid，lookingdownandnervouslyclaspingandunclaspingherhands，`wehadSUCHathunderstormlastTuesday——ImeanoneofthelastsetofTuesdays，youknow。’
　　Alicewaspuzzled。`InOURcountry，’sheremarked，`there’sonlyonedayatatime。’
　　TheRedQueensaid，`That’sapoorthinwayofdoingthings。
　　NowHERE，wemostlyhavedaysandnightstwoorthreeatatime，andsometimesinthewinterwetakeasmanyasfivenightstogether——forwarmth，youknow。’
　　`Arefivenightswarmerthanonenight，then？’Aliceventuredtoask。
　　`Fivetimesaswarm，ofcourse。’
　　`ButtheyshouldbefivetimesasCOLD，bythesamerule——’
　　`Justso!’criedtheRedQueen。`Fivetimesaswarm，ANDfivetimesascold——justasI’mfivetimesasrichasyouare，AND
　　fivetimesasclever!’
　　Alicesighedandgaveitup。`It’sexactlylikeariddlewithnoanswer!’shethought。
　　`HumptyDumptysawittoo，’theWhiteQueenwentoninalowvoice，moreasifsheweretalkingtoherself。`Hecametothedoorwithacorkscrewinhishand——’
　　`Whatdidhewant？’saidtheRedQueen。
　　`HesaidheWOULDcomein，’theWhiteQueenwenton，`becausehewaslookingforahippopotamus。Now，asithappened，therewasn’tsuchathinginthehouse，thatmorning。’
　　`Istheregenerally？’Aliceaskedinanastonishedtone。
　　`Well，onlyonThursdays，’saidtheQueen。
　　`Iknowwhathecamefor，’saidAlice：`hewantedtopunishthefish，because——’
　　HeretheWhiteQueenbeganagain。`ItwasSUCHathunderstorm，youcan’tthink!’（SheNEVERcould，youknow，’saidtheRedQueen。）`Andpartoftheroofcameoff，andeversomuchthundergotin——anditwentrollingroundtheroomingreatlumps——
　　andknockingoverthetablesandthings——tillIwassofrightened，Icouldn’tremembermyownname!’
　　Alicethoughttoherself，`InevershouldTRYtoremembermynameinthemiddleofanaccident!Wherewouldbetheuseofit？’butshedidnotsaythisaloud，forfearofhurtingthepoorQueen’sfeeling。
　　`YourMajestymustexcuseher，’theRedQueensaidtoAlice，takingoneoftheWhiteQueen’shandsinherown，andgentlystrokingit：`shemeanswell，butshecan’thelpsayingfoolishthings，asageneralrule。’
　　TheWhiteQueenlookedtimidlyatAlice，whofeltsheOUGHTtosaysomethingkind，butreallycouldn’tthinkofanythingatthemoment。
　　`Sheneverwasreallywellbroughtup，’theRedQueenwenton：
　　`butit’samazinghowgood—temperedsheis!Patheronthehead，andseehowpleasedshe’llbe!’ButthiswasmorethanAlicehadcouragetodo。
　　`Alittlekindness——andputtingherhairinpapers——woulddowonderswithher——’
　　TheWhiteQueengaveadeepsigh，andlaidherheadonAlice’sshoulder。`IAMsosleepy？’shemoaned。
　　`She’stired，poorthing!’saidtheRedQueen。`Smoothherhair——lendheryournightcap——andsingherasoothinglullaby。’
　　`Ihaven’tgotanightcapwithme，’saidAlice，asshetriedtoobeythefirstdirection：`andIdon’tknowanysoothinglullabies。’
　　`Imustdoitmyself，then，’saidtheRedQueen，andshebegan：
　　`Hush—a—bylady，inAlice’slap!
　　Tillthefeast’sready，we’vetimeforanap：
　　Whenthefeast’sover，we’llgototheball——
　　RedQueen，andWhiteQueen，andAlice，andall!
　　`Andnowyouknowthewords，’sheadded，assheputherheaddownonAlice’sothershoulder，`justsingitthroughtoME。I’mgettingsleepy，too。’InanothermomentbothQueenswerefastasleep，andsnoringloud。
　　`WhatAMItodo？’exclaimedAlice，lookingaboutingreatperplexity，asfirstoneroundhead，andthentheother，rolleddownfromhershoulder，andlaylikeaheavylumpinherlap。
　　`Idon’tthinkitEVERhappenedbefore，thatanyonehadtotakecareoftwoQueensasleepatonce!No，notinalltheHistoryofEngland——itcouldn’t，youknow，becausethereneverwasmorethanoneQueenatatime。`Dowakeup，youheavythings!’
　　shewentoninanimpatienttone；buttherewasnoanswerbutagentlesnoring。
　　Thesnoringgotmoredistincteveryminute，andsoundedmorelikeatune：atlastshecouldevenmakeoutthewords，andshelistenedsoeagerlythat，whenthetwogreatheadsvanishedfromherlap，shehardlymissedthem。
　　ShewasstandingbeforeanarcheddoorwayoverwhichwerethewordsQUEENALICEinlargeletters，andoneachsideofthearchtherewasabell—handle；onewasmarked`Visitors’Bell，’andtheother`Servants’Bell。’
　　`I’llwaittillthesong’sover，’thoughtAlice，`andthenI’llring——the——WHICHbellmustIring？’shewenton，verymuchpuzzledbythenames。`I’mnotavisitor，andI’mnotaservant。
　　ThereOUGHTtobeonemarked"Queen，"youknow——’
　　Justthenthedooropenedalittleway，andacreaturewithalongbeakputitsheadoutforamomentandsaid`Noadmittancetilltheweekafternext!’andshutthedooragainwithabang。
　　Aliceknockedandranginvainforalongtime，butatlast，averyoldFrog，whowassittingunderatree，gotupandhobbledslowlytowardsher：hewasdressedinbrightyellow，andhadenormousbootson。
　　`Whatisit，now？’theFrogsaidinadeephoarsewhisper。
　　Aliceturnedround，readytofindfaultwithanybody。`Where’stheservantwhosebusinessitistoanswerthedoor？’shebeganangrily。
　　`Whichdoor？’saidtheFrog。
　　Alicealmoststampedwithirritationattheslowdrawlinwhichhespoke。`THISdoor，ofcourse!’
　　TheFroglookedatthedoorwithhislargedulleyesforaminute：
　　thenhewentnearerandrubbeditwithhisthumb，asifheweretryingwhetherthepaintwouldcomeoff；thenhelookedatAlice。
　　`Toanswerthedoor？’hesaid。`What’sitbeenaskingof？’
　　HewassohoarsethatAlicecouldscarcelyhearhim。
　　`Idon’tknowwhatyoumean，’shesaid。
　　`ItalksEnglish，doesn’tI？’theFrogwenton。`Orareyoudeaf？
　　Whatdiditaskyou？’
　　`Nothing!’Alicesaidimpatiently。`I’vebeenknockingatit!’
　　`Shouldn’tdothat——shouldn’tdothat——’theFrogmuttered。
　　`Vexesit，youknow。’Thenhewentupandgavethedoorakickwithoneofhisgreatfeet。`YouletITalone，’hepantedout，ashehobbledbacktohistree，`andit’llletYOUalone，youknow。’
　　Atthismomentthedoorwasflungopen，andashrillvoicewasheardsinging：
　　`TotheLooking—GlassworlditwasAlicethatsaid，"I’veasceptreinhand，I’veacrownonmyhead；
　　LettheLooking—Glasscreatures，whatevertheybe，ComeanddinewiththeRedQueen，theWhiteQueen，andme。"’
　　Andhundredsofvoicesjoinedinthechorus：
　　`Thenfilluptheglassesasquickasyoucan，Andsprinklethetablewithbuttonsandbran：
　　Putcatsinthecoffee，andmiceinthetea——
　　AndwelcomeQueenAlicewiththirty—times—three!’
　　Thenfollowedaconfusednoiseofcheering，andAlicethoughttoherself，`Thirtytimesthreemakesninety。Iwonderifanyone’scounting？’Inaminutetherewassilenceagain，andthesameshrillvoicesanganotherverse；
　　`"OLooking—Glasscreatures，"quotheAlice，"drawnear!
　　’Tisanhonourtoseeme，afavourtohear：
　　’TisaprivilegehightohavedinnerandteaAlongwiththeRedQueen，theWhiteQueen，andme!"’
　　Thencamethechorusagain：——
　　`Thenfilluptheglasseswithtreacleandink，Oranythingelsethatispleasanttodrink：
　　Mixsandwiththecider，andwoolwiththewine——
　　AndwelcomeQueenAlicewithninety—times—nine!’
　　`Ninetytimesnine!’Alicerepeatedindespair，`Oh，that’llneverbedone!I’dbettergoinatonce——’andtherewasadeadsilencethemomentsheappeared。
　　Aliceglancednervouslyalongthetable，asshewalkedupthelargehall，andnoticedthattherewereaboutfiftyguests，ofallkinds：somewereanimals，somebirds，andtherewereevenafewflowersamongthem。`I’mgladthey’vecomewithoutwaitingtobeasked，’shethought：`Ishouldneverhaveknownwhoweretherightpeopletoinvite!’
　　Therewerethreechairsattheheadofthetable；theRedandWhiteQueenshadalreadytakentwoofthem，butthemiddleonewasempty。Alicesatdowninit，ratheruncomfortableinthesilence，andlongingforsomeonetospeak。
　　AtlasttheRedQueenbegan。`You’vemissedthesoupandfish，’shesaid。`Putonthejoint!’AndthewaiterssetalegofmuttonbeforeAlice，wholookedatitratheranxiously，asshehadneverhadtocarveajointbefore。
　　`Youlookalittleshy；letmeintroduceyoutothatlegofmutton，’saidtheRedQueen。`Alice——Mutton；Mutton——Alice。’
　　ThelegofmuttongotupinthedishandmadealittlebowtoAlice；andAlicereturnedthebow，notknowingwhethertobefrightenedoramused。
　　`MayIgiveyouaslice？’shesaid，takinguptheknifeandfork，andlookingfromoneQueentotheother。
　　`Certainlynot，’theRedQueensaid，verydecidedly：
　　`itisn’tetiquettetocutanyoneyou’vebeenintroducedto。
　　Removethejoint!’Andthewaiterscarrieditoff，andbroughtalargeplum—puddinginitsplace。
　　`Iwon’tbeintroducedtothepudding，please，’Alicesaidratherhastily，`orweshallgetnodinneratall。MayIgiveyousome？’
　　ButtheRedQueenlookedsulky，andgrowled`Pudding——Alice；
　　Alice——Pudding。Removethepudding!’andthewaiterstookitawaysoquicklythatAlicecouldn’treturnitsbow。
　　However，shedidn’tseewhytheRedQueenshouldbetheonlyonetogiveorders，so，asanexperiment，shecalledout`Waiter!
　　Bringbackthepudding!’andthereitwasagaininamomentlikeaconjuring—trick。Itwassolargethatshecouldn’thelpfeelingaLITTLEshywithit，asshehadbeenwiththemutton；
　　however，sheconqueredhershynessbyagreateffortandcutasliceandhandedittotheRedQueen。
　　`Whatimpertinence!’saidthePudding。`Iwonderhowyou’dlikeit，ifIweretocutasliceoutofYOU，youcreature!’
　　Itspokeinathick，suetysortofvoice，andAlicehadn’tawordtosayinreply：shecouldonlysitandlookatitandgasp。
　　`Makearemark，’saidtheRedQueen：`it’sridiculoustoleavealltheconversationtothepudding!’
　　`Doyouknow，I’vehadsuchaquantityofpoetryrepeatedtometo—day，’Alicebegan，alittlefrightenedatfindingthat，themomentsheopenedherlips，therewasdeadsilence，andalleyeswerefixeduponher；`andit’saverycuriousthing，Ithink——
　　everypoemwasaboutfishesinsomeway。Doyouknowwhythey’resofondoffishes，allabouthere？’
　　ShespoketotheRedQueen，whoseanswerwasalittlewideofthemark。`Astofishes，’shesaid，veryslowlyandsolemnly，puttinghermouthclosetoAlice’sear，`herWhiteMajestyknowsalovelyriddle——allinpoetry——allaboutfishes。Shallsherepeatit？’
　　`HerRedMajesty’sverykindtomentionit，’theWhiteQueenmurmuredintoAlice’sotherear，inavoicelikethecooingofapigeon。`ItwouldbeSUCHatreat!MayI？’
　　`Pleasedo，’Alicesaidverypolitely。
　　TheWhiteQueenlaughedwithdelight，andstrokedAlice’scheek。Thenshebegan：
　　`"First，thefishmustbecaught。"
　　Thatiseasy：ababy，Ithink，couldhavecaughtit。
　　"Next，thefishmustbebought。"
　　Thatiseasy：apenny，Ithink，wouldhaveboughtit。
　　"Nowcookmethefish!"
　　Thatiseasy，andwillnottakemorethanaminute。
　　"Letitlieinadish!"
　　Thatiseasy，becauseitalreadyisinit。
　　"Bringithere!Letmesup!"
　　Itiseasytosetsuchadishonthetable。
　　"Takethedish—coverup!"
　　Ah，THATissohardthatIfearI’munable!
　　Foritholdsitlikeglue——
　　Holdsthelidtothedish，whileitliesinthemiddle：
　　Whichiseasiesttodo，Un—dish—coverthefish，ordishcovertheriddle？’
　　`Takeaminutetothinkaboutit，andthenguess，’saidtheRedQueen。
　　`Meanwhile，we’lldrinkyourhealth——QueenAlice’shealth!’
　　shescreamedatthetopofhervoice，andalltheguestsbegandrinkingitdirectly，andveryqueerlytheymanagedit：
　　someofthemputtheirglassesupontheirheadslikeextinguishers，anddrankallthattrickleddowntheirfaces——othersupsetthedecanters，anddrankthewineasitranofftheedgesofthetable——andthreeofthem（wholookedlikekangaroos）scrambledintothedishofroastmutton，andbeganeagerlylappingupthegravy，`justlikepigsinatrough!’
　　thoughtAlice。
　　`Yououghttoreturnthanksinaneatspeech，’theRedQueensaid，frowningatAliceasshespoke。
　　`Wemustsupportyou，youknow，’theWhiteQueenwhispered，asAlicegotuptodoit，veryobediently，butalittlefrightened。
　　`Thankyouverymuch，’shewhisperedinreply，`butIcandoquitewellwithout。’
　　`Thatwouldn’tbeatallthething，’theRedQueensaidverydecidedly：soAlicetriedtosubmittoitwithagoodgrace。
　　（`AndtheyDIDpushso!’shesaidafterwards，whenshewastellinghersisterthehistoryofthefeast。`Youwouldhavethoughttheywantedtosqueezemeflat!’）
　　Infactitwasratherdifficultforhertokeepinherplacewhileshemadeherspeech：thetwoQueenspushedherso，oneoneachside，thattheynearlyliftedherupintotheair：`Irisetoreturnthanks——’Alicebegan：andshereallyDIDriseasshespoke，severalinches；butshegotholdoftheedgeofthetable，andmanagedtopullherselfdownagain。
　　`Takecareofyourself!’screamedtheWhiteQueen，seizingAlice’shairwithbothherhands。`Something’sgoingtohappen!’
　　Andthen（asAliceafterwardsdescribedit）allsortsofthinghappenedinamoment。Thecandlesallgrewuptotheceiling，lookingsomethinglikeabedofrusheswithfireworksatthetop。
　　Astothebottles，theyeachtookapairofplates，whichtheyhastilyfittedonaswings，andso，withforksforlegs，wentflutteringaboutinalldirections：`andverylikebirdstheylook，’Alicethoughttoherself，aswellasshecouldinthedreadfulconfusionthatwasbeginning。
　　Atthismomentsheheardahoarselaughatherside，andturnedtoseewhatwasthematterwiththeWhiteQueen；but，insteadoftheQueen，therewasthelegofmuttonsittinginthechair。
　　`HereIam!’criedavoicefromthesouptureen，andAliceturnedagain，justintimetoseetheQueen’sbroadgood—naturedfacegrinningatherforamomentovertheedgeofthetureen，beforeshedisappearedintothesoup。
　　Therewasnotamomenttobelost。Alreadyseveraloftheguestswerelyingdowninthedishes，andthesoupladlewaswalkingupthetabletowardsAlice’schair，andbeckoningtoherimpatientlytogetoutofitsway。
　　`Ican’tstandthisanylonger!’shecriedasshejumpedupandseizedthetable—clothwithbothhands：onegoodpull，andplates，dishes，guests，andcandlescamecrashingdowntogetherinaheaponthefloor。
　　`AndasforYOU，’shewenton，turningfiercelyupontheRedQueen，whomsheconsideredasthecauseofallthemischief——buttheQueenwasnolongeratherside——shehadsuddenlydwindleddowntothesizeofalittledoll，andwasnowonthetable，merrilyrunningroundandroundafterherownshawl，whichwastrailingbehindher。
　　Atanyothertime，Alicewouldhavefeltsurprisedatthis，butshewasfartoomuchexcitedtobesurprisedatanythingNOW。
　　`AsforYOU，’sherepeated，catchingholdofthelittlecreatureintheveryactofjumpingoverabottlewhichhadjustlighteduponthetable，`I’llshakeyouintoakitten，thatIwill!’
　　CHAPTERX
　　ShakingShetookheroffthetableasshespoke，andshookherbackwardsandforwardswithallhermight。
　　TheRedQueenmadenoresistancewhatever；onlyherfacegrewverysmall，andhereyesgotlargeandgreen：andstill，asAlicewentonshakingher，shekeptongrowingshorter——andfatter——andsofter——androunder——and——
　　CHAPTERXI
　　Waking——anditreallyWASakitten，afterall。
　　CHAPTERXII
　　WhichDreamedit？
　　`Yourmajestyshouldn’tpurrsoloud，’Alicesaid，rubbinghereyes，andaddressingthekitten，respectfully，yetwithsomeseverity。`Youwokemeoutofoh!suchanicedream!Andyou’vebeenalongwithme，Kitty——allthroughtheLooking—Glassworld。
　　Didyouknowit，dear？’
　　Itisaveryinconvenienthabitofkittens（Alicehadoncemadetheremark）that，whateveryousaytothem，theyALWAYSpurr。
　　`Ifthemwouldonlypurrfor"yes"andmewfor"no，"oranyruleofthatsort，’shehadsaid，`sothatonecouldkeepupaconversation!ButhowCANyoutalkwithapersoniftheyalwayssaythesamething？’
　　Onthisoccasionthekittenonlypurred：anditwasimpossibletoguesswhetheritmeant`yes’or`no。’
　　SoAlicehuntedamongthechessmenonthetabletillshehadfoundtheRedQueen：thenshewentdownonherkneesonthehearth—rug，andputthekittenandtheQueentolookateachother。`Now，Kitty!’shecried，clappingherhandstriumphantly。
　　`Confessthatwaswhatyouturnedinto!’
　　（`Butitwouldn’tlookatit，’shesaid，whenshewasexplainingthethingafterwardstohersister：`itturnedawayitshead，andpretendednottoseeit：butitlookedaLITTLE
　　ashamedofitself，soIthinkitMUSThavebeentheRedQueen。’）
　　`Situpalittlemorestiffly，dear!’Alicecriedwithamerrylaugh。`Andcurtseywhileyou’rethinkingwhatto——whattopurr。Itsavestime，remember!’Andshecaughtitupandgaveitonelittlekiss，`justinhonourofhavingbeenaRedQueen。’
　　`Snowdrop，mypet!’shewenton，lookingoverhershoulderattheWhiteKitten，whichwasstillpatientlyundergoingitstoilet，`whenWILLDinahhavefinishedwithyourWhiteMajesty，I
　　wonder？Thatmustbethereasonyouweresountidyinmydream——
　　Dinah!doyouknowthatyou’rescrubbingaWhiteQueen？
　　Really，it’smostdisrespectfulofyou!
　　`AndwhatdidDINAHturnto，Iwonder？’sheprattledon，asshesettledcomfortablydown，withoneelbowintherug，andherchininherhand，towatchthekittens。`Tellme，Dinah，didyouturntoHumptyDumpty？ITHINKyoudid——however，you’dbetternotmentionittoyourfriendsjustyet，forI’mnotsure。
　　`Bytheway，Kitty，ifonlyyou’dbeenreallywithmeinmydream，therewasonethingyouWOULDhaveenjoyed——Ihadsuchaquantityofpoetrysaidtome，allaboutfishes!To—morrowmorningyoushallhavearealtreat。Allthetimeyou’reeatingyourbreakfast，I’llrepeat"TheWalrusandtheCarpenter"toyou；andthenyoucanmakebelieveit’soysters，dear!
　　`Now，Kitty，let’sconsiderwhoitwasthatdreameditall。
　　Thisisaseriousquestion，mydear，andyoushouldNOTgoonlickingyourpawlikethat——asifDinahhadn’twashedyouthismorning!Yousee，Kitty，itMUSThavebeeneithermeortheRedKing。Hewaspartofmydream，ofcourse——butthenIwaspartofhisdream，too!WASittheRedKing，Kitty？Youwerehiswife，mydear，soyououghttoknow——Oh，Kitty，DOhelptosettleit!I’msureyourpawcanwait!’Buttheprovokingkittenonlybeganontheotherpaw，andpretendedithadn’theardthequestion。
　　WhichdoYOUthinkitwas？
　　———
　　Aboatbeneathasunnysky，LingeringonwarddreamilyInaneveningofJuly——
　　Childrenthreethatnestlenear，Eagereyeandwillingear，Pleasedasimpletaletohear——
　　Longhaspaledthatsunnysky：
　　Echoesfadeandmemoriesdie。
　　AutumnfrostshaveslainJuly。
　　Stillshehauntsme，phantomwise，AlicemovingunderskiesNeverseenbywakingeyes。
　　Childrenyet，thetaletohear，Eagereyeandwillingear，Lovinglyshallnestlenear。
　　InaWonderlandtheylie，Dreamingasthedaysgoby，Dreamingasthesummersdie：
　　Everdriftingdownthestream——
　　Lingeringinthegoldengleam——
　　Life，whatisitbutadream？