"Worthyofmyundyingregard"
  TO
  BORYS
  ANDALLOTHERSWHO,LIKEHIMSELF,HAVECROSSED
  INEARLYYOUTHTHESHADOWLINEOF
  THEIRGENERATIONWITHLOVE
  PARTONE
  ——D’autrefois,calmeplat,grandmiroirDemondesespoir。
  ——BAUDELAIRE
  ChapterI
  ONLYtheyounghavesuchmoments。Idon’tmeantheveryyoung。No。Theveryyounghave,properlyspeaking,nomoments。Itistheprivi-
  legeofearlyyouthtoliveinadvanceofitsdaysinallthebeautifulcontinuityofhopewhichknowsnopausesandnointrospection。
  Oneclosesbehindonethelittlegateofmereboyishness——andentersanenchantedgarden。Itsveryshadesglowwithpromise。Everyturnofthepathhasitsseduction。Anditisn’tbecauseitisanundiscoveredcountry。Oneknowswellenoughthatallmankindhadstreamedthatway。
  Itisthecharmofuniversalexperiencefromwhichoneexpectsanuncommonorpersonalsensation——
  abitofone’sown。
  Onegoesonrecognizingthelandmarksofthepredecessors,excited,amused,takingthehardluckandthegoodlucktogether——thekicksandthehalfpence,asthesayingis——thepicturesquecommonlotthatholdssomanypossibilitiesforthedeservingorperhapsforthelucky。Yes。
  Onegoeson。Andthetime,too,goeson——tilloneperceivesaheadashadow-linewarningonethattheregionofearlyyouth,too,mustbeleftbe-
  hind。
  ThisistheperiodoflifeinwhichsuchmomentsofwhichIhavespokenarelikelytocome。Whatmoments?Why,themomentsofboredom,ofweariness,ofdissatisfaction。Rashmoments。
  Imeanmomentswhenthestillyoungareinclinedtocommitrashactions,suchasgettingmarriedsuddenlyorelsethrowingupajobfornorea-
  son。
  Thisisnotamarriagestory。Itwasn’tsobadasthatwithme。Myaction,rashasitwas,hadmorethecharacterofdivorce——almostofdeser-
  tion。FornoreasononwhichasensiblepersoncouldputafingerIthrewupmyjob——chuckedmyberth——lefttheshipofwhichtheworstthatcouldbesaidwasthatshewasasteamshipandtherefore,perhaps,notentitledtothatblindloyaltywhich……However,it’snousetry-
  ingtoputaglossonwhatevenatthetimeImyselfhalfsuspectedtobeacaprice。
  ItwasinanEasternport。ShewasanEasternship,inasmuchasthenshebelongedtothatport。
  Shetradedamongdarkislandsonabluereef-
  scarredsea,withtheRedEnsignoverthetaffrailandathermastheadahouse-flag,alsored,butwithagreenborderandwithawhitecrescentinit。ForanArabownedher,andaSyedatthat。
  Hencethegreenborderontheflag。HewastheheadofagreatHouseofStraitsArabs,butasloyalasubjectofthecomplexBritishEmpireasyoucouldfindeastoftheSuezCanal。Worldpoliticsdidnottroublehimatall,buthehadagreatoccultpoweramongsthisownpeople。
  Itwasallonetouswhoownedtheship。Hehadtoemploywhitemenintheshippingpartofhisbusiness,andmanyofthosehesoemployedhadneverseteyesonhimfromthefirsttothelastday。Imyselfsawhimbutonce,quiteaccidentallyonawharf——anold,darklittlemanblindinoneeye,inasnowyrobeandyellowslippers。HewashavinghishandseverelykissedbyacrowdofMalaypilgrimstowhomhehaddonesomefavour,inthewayoffoodandmoney。
  Hisalms-giving,Ihaveheard,wasmostexten-
  sive,coveringalmostthewholeArchipelago。Forisn’titsaidthat"ThecharitablemanisthefriendofAllah"?
  Excellent(andpicturesque)Arabowner,aboutwhomoneneedednottotroubleone’shead,amostexcellentScottishship——forshewasthatfromthekeepup——excellentsea-boat,easytokeepclean,mosthandyineveryway,andifithadnotbeenforherinternalpropulsion,worthyofanyman’slove,Icherishtothisdayaprofoundrespectforhermemory。Astothekindoftradeshewasengagedinandthecharacterofmyship-
  mates,IcouldnothavebeenhappierifIhadhadthelifeandthemenmadetomyorderbyabenevolentEnchanter。
  AndsuddenlyIleftallthis。Ileftitinthat,tous,inconsequentialmannerinwhichabirdfliesawayfromacomfortablebranch。ItwasasthoughallunknowingIhadheardawhisperorseensomething。Well——perhaps!OnedayIwasperfectlyrightandthenexteverythingwasgone——glamour,flavour,interest,contentment——every-
  thing。Itwasoneofthesemoments,youknow。
  Thegreensicknessoflateyouthdescendedonmeandcarriedmeoff。Carriedmeoffthatship,I
  mean。
  Wewereonlyfourwhitemenonboard,withalargecrewofKalashesandtwoMalaypettyofficers。TheCaptainstaredhardasifwonderingwhatailedme。Buthewasasailor,andhe,too,hadbeenyoungatonetime。Presentlyasmilecametolurkunderhisthickiron-graymoustache,andheobservedthat,ofcourse,ifIfeltImustgohecouldn’tkeepmebymainforce。AnditwasarrangedthatIshouldbepaidoffthenextmorn-
  ing。AsIwasgoingoutofhiscabinheaddedsuddenly,inapeculiarwistfultone,thathehopedIwouldfindwhatIwassoanxioustogoandlookfor。Asoft,crypticutterancewhichseemedtoreachdeeperthananydiamond-hardtoolcouldhavedone。Idobelieveheunderstoodmycase。
  Butthesecondengineerattackedmedifferently。
  HewasasturdyyoungScot,withasmoothfaceandlighteyes。Hishonestredcountenanceemergedoutoftheengine-roomcompanionandthenthewholerobustman,withshirtsleevesturnedup,wipingslowlythemassivefore-armswithalumpofcotton-waste。Andhislighteyesexpressedbitterdistaste,asthoughourfriendshiphadturnedtoashes。Hesaidweightily:"Oh!Aye!I’vebeenthinkingitwasabouttimeforyoutorunawayhomeandgetmarriedtosomesillygirl。"
  ItwastacitlyunderstoodintheportthatJohnNievenwasafiercemisogynist;andtheabsurdcharacterofthesallyconvincedmethathemeanttobenasty——verynasty——hadmeanttosaythemostcrushingthinghecouldthinkof。Mylaughsoundeddeprecatory。Nobodybutafriendcouldbesoangryasthat。Ibecamealittlecrestfallen。
  Ourchiefengineeralsotookacharacteristicviewofmyaction,butinakindlierspirit。
  Hewasyoung,too,butverythin,andwithamistoffluffybrownbeardallroundhishaggardface。Alldaylong,atseaorinharbour,hecouldbeseenwalkinghastilyupanddowntheafter-
  deck,wearinganintense,spirituallyraptex-
  pression,whichwascausedbyaperpetualcon-
  sciousnessofunpleasantphysicalsensationsinhisinternaleconomy。Forhewasaconfirmeddyspeptic。Hisviewofmycasewasverysimple。
  Hesaiditwasnothingbutderangedliver。Ofcourse!HesuggestedIshouldstayforanothertripandmeantimedosemyselfwithacertainpatentmedicineinwhichhisownbeliefwasab-
  solute。"I’lltellyouwhatI’lldo。I’llbuyyoutwobottles,outofmyownpocket。There。I
  can’tsayfairerthanthat,canI?"
  Ibelievehewouldhaveperpetratedtheatrocity(orgenerosity)atthemerestsignofweakeningonmypart。Bythattime,however,Iwasmorediscontented,disgusted,anddoggedthanever。
  Thepasteighteenmonths,sofullofnewandvariedexperience,appearedadreary,prosaicwasteofdays。Ifelt——howshallIexpressit?——thattherewasnotruthtobegotoutofthem。
  Whattruth?Ishouldhavebeenhardputtoittoexplain。Probably,ifpressed,Iwouldhaveburstintotearssimply。Iwasyoungenoughforthat。
  NextdaytheCaptainandItransactedourbusi-
  nessintheHarbourOffice。Itwasalofty,big,cool,whiteroom,wherethescreenedlightofdayglowedserenely。Everybodyinit——theofficials,thepublic——wereinwhite。Onlytheheavypolisheddesksgleameddarklyinacentralavenue,andsomepaperslyingonthemwereblue。Enor-
  mouspunkahssentfromonhighagentledraughtthroughthatimmaculateinterioranduponourperspiringheads。
  Theofficialbehindthedeskweapproachedgrinnedamiablyandkeptituptill,inanswertohisperfunctoryquestion,"Signoffandonagain?"
  myCaptainanswered,"No!Signingoffforgood。"
  Andthenhisgrinvanishedinsuddensolemnity。
  Hedidnotlookatmeagaintillhehandedmemypaperswithasorrowfulexpression,asiftheyhadbeenmypassportsforHades。
  WhileIwasputtingthemawayhemurmuredsomequestiontotheCaptain,andIheardthelatteranswergood-humouredly:
  "No。Heleavesustogohome。"
  "Oh!"theotherexclaimed,noddingmournfullyovermysadcondition。
  Ididn’tknowhimoutsidetheofficialbuilding,butheleanedforwardthedesktoshakehandswithme,compassionately,asonewouldwithsomepoordevilgoingouttobehanged;andIamafraidIperformedmypartungraciously,inthehardenedmannerofanimpenitentcriminal。
  Nohomeward-boundmail-boatwasdueforthreeorfourdays。Beingnowamanwithoutaship,andhavingforatimebrokenmyconnectionwiththesea——become,infact,amerepotentialpassenger——itwouldhavebeenmoreappropriateperhapsifIhadgonetostayatanhotel。Thereitwas,too,withinastone’sthrowoftheHarbourOffice,low,butsomehowpalatial,displayingitswhite,pillaredpavilionssurroundedbytrimgrassplots。Iwouldhavefeltapassengerindeedinthere!IgaveitahostileglanceanddirectedmystepstowardtheOfficers’Sailors’Home。
  Iwalkedinthesunshine,disregardingit,andintheshadeofthebigtreesontheesplanadewithoutenjoyingit。TheheatofthetropicalEastde-
  scendedthroughtheleafyboughs,envelopingmythinly-cladbody,clingingtomyrebelliousdis-
  content,asiftorobitofitsfreedom。
  TheOfficers’Homewasalargebungalowwithawideverandahandacuriouslysuburban-lookinglittlegardenofbushesandafewtreesbetweenitandthestreet。Thatinstitutionpartooksome-
  whatofthecharacterofaresidentialclub,butwithaslightlyGovernmentalflavouraboutit,becauseitwasadministeredbytheHarbourOffice。
  ItsmanagerwasofficiallystyledChiefSteward。
  Hewasanunhappy,wizenedlittleman,whoifputintoajockey’srigwouldhavelookedtheparttoperfection。Butitwasobviousthatatsometimeorotherinhislife,insomecapacityorother,hehadbeenconnectedwiththesea。Possiblyinthecomprehensivecapacityofafailure。
  Ishouldhavethoughthisemploymentaveryeasyone,butheusedtoaffirmforsomereasonorotherthathisjobwouldbethedeathofhimsomeday。Itwasrathermysterious。Perhapseverythingnaturallywastoomuchtroubleforhim。Hecer-
  tainlyseemedtohatehavingpeopleinthehouse。
  OnenteringitIthoughthemustbefeelingpleased。Itwasasstillasatomb。Icouldseenooneinthelivingrooms;andtheverandah,too,wasempty,exceptforamanatthefarenddozingproneinalongchair。Atthenoiseofmyfootstepsheopenedonehorriblyfish-likeeye。Hewasastrangertome。Iretreatedfromthere,andcross-
  ingthediningroom——averybareapartmentwithamotionlesspunkahhangingoverthecentretable——Iknockedatadoorlabelledinblackletters:
  "ChiefSteward。"
  Theanswertomyknockbeingavexedanddole-
  fulplaint:"Oh,dear!Oh,dear!Whatisitnow?"Iwentinatonce。
  Itwasastrangeroomtofindinthetropics。
  Twilightandstuffinessreignedinthere。Thefellowhadhungenormouslyample,dusty,cheaplacecurtainsoverhiswindows,whichwereshut。
  Pilesofcardboardboxes,suchasmillinersanddressmakersuseinEurope,cumberedthecorners;
  andbysomemeanshehadprocuredforhimselfthesortoffurniturethatmighthavecomeoutofarespectableparlourintheEastEndofLondon——ahorsehairsofa,arm-chairsofthesame。I
  glimpsedgrimyantimacassarsscatteredoverthathorridupholstery,whichwasawe-inspiring,in-
  somuchthatonecouldnotguesswhatmysteriousaccident,need,orfancyhadcollecteditthere。
  Itsownerhadtakenoffhistunic,andinwhitetrousersandathin,short-sleevedsingletprowledbehindthechair-backsnursinghismeagreel-
  bows。
  AnexclamationofdismayescapedhimwhenheheardthatIhadcomeforastay;buthecouldnotdenythattherewereplentyofvacantrooms。
  "Verywell。CanyougivemetheoneIhadbefore?"
  Heemittedafaintmoanfrombehindapileofcardboardboxesonthetable,whichmighthavecontainedglovesorhandkerchiesorneckties。I
  wonderwhatthefellowdidkeepinthem?Therewasasmellofdecayingcoral,orOrientaldustofzoologicalspecimentsinthatdenofhis。I
  couldonlyseethetopofhisheadandhisun-
  happyeyeslevelledatmeoverthebarrier。
  "It’sonlyforacoupleofdays,"Isaid,intendingtocheerhimup。
  "Perhapsyouwouldliketopayinadvance?"
  hesuggestedeagerly。
  "Certainlynot!"IburstoutdirectlyIcouldspeak。"Neverheardofsuchathing!Thisisthemostinfernalcheek……"
  Hehadseizedhisheadinbothhands——agestureofdespairwhichcheckedmyindignation。
  "Oh,dear!Oh,dear!Don’tflyoutlikethis。
  Iamaskingeverybody。"
  "Idon’tbelieveit,"Isaidbluntly。
  "Well,Iamgoingto。AndifyougentlemenallagreedtopayinadvanceIcouldmakeHamil-
  tonpayup,too。He’salwaysturningupashoredeadbroke,andevenwhenhehassomemoneyhewon’tsettlehisbills。Idon’tknowwhattodowithhim。HeswearsatmeandtellsmeIcan’tchuckawhitemanoutintothestreethere。Soifyouonlywould……"
  Iwasamazed。Incredulous,too。Isuspectedthefellowofgratuitousimpertinence。ItoldhimwithmarkedemphasisthatIwouldseehimandHamiltonhangedfirst,andrequestedhimtocon-
  ductmetomyroomwithnomoreofhisnonsense。
  Heproducedthenakeyfromsomewhereandledthewayoutofhislair,givingmeavicioussidelonglookinpassing。
  "AnyoneIknowstayinghere?"Iaskedhimbeforeheleftmyroom。
  Hehadrecoveredhisusualpainedimpatienttone,andsaidthatCaptainGileswasthere,backfromaSoloSeatrip。Twootherguestswerestay-
  ingalso。Hepaused。And,ofcourse,Hamilton,headded。
  "Oh,yes!Hamilton,"Isaid,andthemiserablecreaturetookhimselfoffwithafinalgroan。
  HisimpudencestillrankledwhenIcameintothediningroomattiffintime。HewasthereondutyoverlookingtheChinamenservants。Thetiffinwaslaidononeendonlyofthelongtable,andthepunkahwasstirringthehotairlazily——mostlyaboveabarrenwasteofpolishedwood。
  Wewerefouraroundthecloth。Thedozingstrangerfromthechairwasone。Bothhiseyeswerepartlyopenednow,buttheydidnotseemtoseeanything。Hewassupine。Thedignifiedpersonnexthim,withshortsidewhiskersandacarefullyscrapedchin,was,ofcourse,Hamilton。
  IhaveneverseenanyonesofullofdignityforthestationinlifeProvidencehadbeenpleasedtoplacehimin。Ihadbeentoldthatheregardedmeasarankoutsider。Heraisednotonlyhiseyes,buthiseyebrowsaswell,atthesoundImadepullingbackmychair。
  CaptainGileswasattheheadofthetable。I
  exchangedafewwordsofgreetingwithhimandsatdownonhisleft。Stoutandpale,withagreatshinydomeofabaldforeheadandprominentbrowneyes,hemighthavebeenanythingbutaseaman。Youwouldnothavebeensurprisedtolearnthathewasanarchitect。Tome(Iknowhowabsurditis)tomehelookedlikeachurch-
  warden。Hehadtheappearanceofamanfromwhomyouwouldexpectsoundadvice,moralsentiments,withperhapsaplatitudeortwothrowninonoccasion,notfromadesiretodazzle,butfromhonestconviction。
  Thoughverywellknownandappreciatedintheshippingworld,hehadnoregularemployment。
  Hedidnotwantit。Hehadhisownpeculiarposition。Hewasanexpert。Anexpertin——howshallIsayit?——inintricatenavigation。Hewassupposedtoknowmoreaboutremoteandim-
  perfectlychartedpartsoftheArchipelagothananymanliving。Hisbrainmusthavebeenaperfectwarehouseofreefs,positions,bearings,imagesofheadlands,shapesofobscurecoasts,aspectsofinnumerableislands,desertandotherwise。Anyship,forinstance,boundonatriptoPalawanorsomewherethatwaywouldhaveCaptainGilesonboard,eitherintemporarycommandor"toassistthemaster。"ItwassaidthathehadaretainingfeefromawealthyfirmofChinesesteamshipowners,inviewofsuchservices。Besides,hewasalwaysreadytorelieveanymanwhowishedtotakeaspellashoreforatime。Noownerwaseverknowntoobjecttoanarrangementofthatsort。
  ForitseemedtobetheestablishedopinionattheportthatCaptainGileswasasgoodasthebest,ifnotalittlebetter。ButinHamilton’sviewhewasan"outsider。"IbelievethatforHamiltonthegeneralisation"outsider"coveredthewholelotofus;thoughIsupposethathemadesomedis-
  tinctionsinhismind。
  Ididn’ttrytomakeconversationwithCaptainGiles,whomIhadnotseenmorethantwiceinmylife。But,ofcourse,heknewwhoIwas。
  Afterawhile,inclininghisbigshinyheadmyway,headdressedmefirstinhisfriendlyfashion。Hepresumedfromseeingmethere,hesaid,thatIhadcomeashoreforacoupleofdays’leave。
  Hewasalow-voicedman。Ispokealittlelouder,sayingthat:No——Ihadlefttheshipforgood。
  "Afreemanforabit,"washiscomment。
  "IsupposeImaycallmyselfthat——sinceeleveno’clock,"Isaid。
  Hamiltonhadstoppedeatingatthesoundofourvoices。Helaiddownhisknifeandforkgently,gotup,andmutteringsomethingabout"thisinfernalheatcuttingone’sappetite,"wentoutoftheroom。Almostimmediatelyweheardhimleavethehousedowntheverandahsteps。
  OnthisCaptainGilesremarkedeasilythatthefellowhadnodoubtgoneofftolookaftermyoldjob。TheChiefSteward,whohadbeenleaningagainstthewall,broughthisfaceofanunhappygoatnearertothetableandaddressedusdole-
  fully。HisobjectwastounburdenhimselfofhiseternalgrievanceagainstHamilton。ThemankepthiminhotwaterwiththeHarbourOfficeastothestateofhisaccounts。Hewishedtogood-
  nesshewouldgetmyjob,thoughintruthwhatwoulditbe?Temporaryreliefatbest。
  Isaid:"Youneedn’tworry。Hewon’tgetmyjob。Mysuccessorisonboardalready。"
  Hewassurprised,andIbelievehisfacefellalittleatthenews。CaptainGilesgaveasoftlaugh。Wegotupandwentoutontheverandah,leavingthesupinestrangertobedealtwithbytheChinamen。ThelastthingIsawtheyhadputaplatewithasliceofpine-appleonitbeforehimandstoodbacktowatchwhatwouldhappen。
  Buttheexperimentseemedafailure。Hesatin-
  sensible。
  ItwasimpartedtomeinalowvoicebyCaptainGilesthatthiswasanofficerofsomeRajah’syachtwhichhadcomeintoourporttobedry-docked。
  Musthavebeen"seeinglife"lastnight,headded,wrinklinghisnoseinanintimate,confidentialwaywhichpleasedmevastly。ForCaptainGileshadprestige。Hewascreditedwithwonderfulad-
  venturesandwithsomemysterioustragedyinhislife。Andnomanhadawordtosayagainsthim。
  Hecontinued:
  "Irememberhimfirstcomingashoreheresomeyearsago。Seemsonlytheotherday。Hewasaniceboy。Oh!theseniceboys!"
  Icouldnothelplaughingaloud。Helookedstartled,thenjoinedinthelaugh。"No!No!
  Ididn’tmeanthat,"hecried。"WhatImeantisthatsomeofthemdogosoftmightyquickouthere。"
  JocularlyIsuggestedthebeastlyheatasthefirstcause。ButCaptainGilesdisclosedhimselfpossessedofadeeperphilosophy。ThingsoutEastweremadeeasyforwhitemen。Thatwasallright。Thedifficultywastogoonkeepingwhite,andsomeoftheseniceboysdidnotknowhow。Hegavemeasearchinglook,andinabenevolent,heavy-unclemanneraskedpointblank:
  "Whydidyouthrowupyourberth?"
  Ibecameangryallofasudden;foryoucanunderstandhowexasperatingsuchaquestionwastoamanwhodidn’tknow。IsaidtomyselfthatIoughttoshutupthatmoralist;andtohimaloudIsaidwithchallengingpoliteness:
  "Why……?Doyoudisapprove?"
  Hewastoodisconcertedtodomorethanmutterconfusedly:"I!……Inageneralway……"andthengavemeup。Butheretiredingoodorder,underthecoverofaheavilyhumorousremarkthathe,too,wasgettingsoft,andthatthiswashistimefortakinghislittlesiesta——whenhewasonshore。"Verybadhabit。Verybadhabit。"
  Therewasasimplicityinthemanwhichwouldhavedisarmedatouchinessevenmoreyouthfulthanmine。SowhennextdayattiffinhebenthisheadtowardmeandsaidthathehadmetmylateCaptainlastevening,addinginanundertone:
  "He’sverysorryyouleft。Hehadneverhadamatethatsuitedhimsowell,"Iansweredhimearnestly,withoutanyaffectation,thatIcertainlyhadn’tbeensocomfortableinanyshiporwithanycommanderinallmysea-goingdays。
  "Well——then,"hemurmured。
  "Haven’tyouheard,CaptainGiles,thatIin-
  tendtogohome?"
  "Yes,"hesaidbenevolently。"Ihaveheardthatsortofthingsooftenbefore。"
  "Whatofthat?"Icried。Ithoughthewasthemostdull,unimaginativemanIhadevermet。I
  don’tknowwhatmoreIwouldhavesaid,butthemuch-belatedHamiltoncameinjustthenandtookhisusualseat。SoIdroppedintoamum-
  ble。
  "Anyhow,youshallseeitdonethistime。"
  Hamilton,beautifullyshaved,gaveCaptainGilesacurtnod,butdidn’tevencondescendtoraisehiseyebrowsatme;andwhenhespokeitwasonlytotelltheChiefStewardthatthefoodonhisplatewasn’tfittobesetbeforeagentleman。Theindividualaddressedseemedmuchtoounhappytogroan。Hecasthiseyesuptothepunkahandthatwasall。
  CaptainGilesandIgotupfromthetable,andthestrangernexttoHamiltonfollowedourex-
  ample,manoeuvringhimselftohisfeetwithdifficulty。He,poorfellow,notbecausehewashungrybutIverilybelieveonlytorecoverhisself-respect,hadtriedtoputsomeofthatun-
  worthyfoodintohismouth。Butafterdroppinghisforktwiceandgenerallymakingafailureofit,hehadsatstillwithanairofintensemortifica-
  tioncombinedwithaghastlyglazedstare。BothGilesandIhadavoidedlookinghiswayattable。
  OntheverandahhestoppedshortonpurposetoaddresstousanxiouslyalongremarkwhichI
  failedtounderstandcompletely。Itsoundedlikesomehorribleunknownlanguage。ButwhenCaptainGiles,afteronlyaninstantforreflection,assuredhimwithhomelyfriendliness,"Aye,tobesure。Youarerightthere,"heappearedverymuchgratifiedindeed,andwentaway(prettystraight,too)toseekadistantlongchair。
  "Whatwashetryingtosay?"Iaskedwithdisgust。
  "Idon’tknow。Mustn’tbedowntoomuchonafellow。He’sfeelingprettywretched,youmaybesure;andto-morrowhe’llfeelworseyet。"
  Judgingbytheman’sappearanceitseemedim-
  possible。Iwonderedwhatsortofcomplicatedde-
  bauchhadreducedhimtothatunspeakablecon-
  dition。CaptainGiles’benevolencewasspoiledbyacuriousairofcomplacencywhichIdisliked。I
  saidwithalittlelaugh:
  "Well,hewillhaveyoutolookafterhim。"
  Hemadeadeprecatorygesture,satdown,andtookupapaper。Ididthesame。Thepaperswereoldanduninteresting,filledupmostlywithdrearystereotypeddescriptionsofQueenVictoria’sfirstjubileecelebrations。ProbablyweshouldhavequicklyfallenintoatropicalafternoondozeifithadnotbeenforHamilton’svoiceraisedinthediningroom。Hewasfinishinghistiffinthere。
  Thebigdoubledoorsstoodwideopenpermanently,andhecouldnothavehadanyideahowneartothedoorwayourchairswereplaced。Hewasheardinaloud,supercilioustoneansweringsomestate-
  mentventuredbytheChiefSteward。
  "Iamnotgoingtoberushedintoanything。
  TheywillbegladenoughtogetagentlemanI
  imagine。Thereisnohurry。"
  AloudwhisperingfromtheStewardsucceededandthenagainHamiltonwasheardwithevenintenserscorn。
  "What?ThatyoungasswhofancieshimselfforhavingbeenchiefmatewithKentsolong?……Preposterous。"
  GilesandIlookedateachother。Kentbeingthecameofmylatecommander,CaptainGiles’
  whisper,"He’stalkingofyou,"seemedtomesheerwasteofbreath。TheChiefStewardmusthavestucktohispoint,whateveritwas,becauseHamil-
  tonwasheardagainmoresuperciliousifpossible,andalsoveryemphatic:
  "Rubbish,mygoodman!Onedoesn’tCOMPETEwitharankoutsiderlikethat。There’splentyoftime。"
  Thentherewerepushingofchairs,footstepsinthenextroom,andplaintiveexpostulationsfromtheSteward,whowaspursuingHamilton,evenoutofdoorsthroughthemainentrance。
  "That’saveryinsultingsortofman,"remarkedCaptainGiles——superfluously,Ithought。"Veryinsulting。Youhaven’toffendedhiminsomeway,haveyou?"
  "Neverspoketohiminmylife,"Isaidgrumpily。
  "Can’timaginewhathemeansbycompeting。HehasbeentryingformyjobafterIleft——anddidn’tgetit。Butthatisn’texactlycompetition。"
  CaptainGilesbalancedhisbigbenevolentheadthoughtfully。"Hedidn’tgetit,"herepeatedveryslowly。"No,notlikelyeither,withKent。
  Kentisnoendsorryyoulefthim。Hegivesyouthenameofagoodseaman,too。"
  IflungawaythepaperIwasstillholding。Isatup,Islappedthetablewithmyopenpalm。I
  wantedtoknowwhyhewouldkeepharpingonthat,myabsolutelyprivateaffair。Itwasexas-
  perating,really。
  CaptainGilessilencedmebytheperfectequanimityofhisgaze。"Nothingtobeannoyedabout,"hemurmuredreasonably,withanevidentdesiretosoothethechildishirritationhehadaroused。Andhewasreallyamanofanappear-
  ancesoinoffensivethatItriedtoexplainmyselfasmuchasIcould。ItoldhimthatIdidnotwanttohearanymoreaboutwhatwaspastandgone。
  Ithadbeenverynicewhileitlasted,butnowitwasdonewithIpreferrednottotalkaboutitoreventhinkaboutit。Ihadmadeupmymindtogohome。
  Helistenedtothewholetiradeinaparticularlending-the-earattitude,asiftryingtodetectafalsenoteinitsomewhere;thenstraightenedhim-
  selfupandappearedtopondersagaciouslyoverthematter。
  "Yes。Youtoldmeyoumeanttogohome。
  Anythinginviewthere?"
  InsteadoftellinghimthatitwasnoneofhisbusinessIsaidsullenly:
  "NothingthatIknowof。"
  IhadindeedconsideredthatratherblanksideofthesituationIhadcreatedformyselfbyleavingsuddenlymyverysatisfactoryemployment。AndIwasnotverypleasedwithit。Ihaditonthetipofmytonguetosaythatcommonsensehadnoth-
  ingtodowithmyaction,andthatthereforeitdidn’tdeservetheinterestCaptainGilesseemedtobetakinginit。Buthewaspuffingatashortwoodenpipenow,andlookedsoguileless,dense,andcommonplace,thatitseemedhardlyworthwhiletopuzzlehimeitherwithtruthorsarcasm。
  Heblewacloudofsmoke,thensurprisedmebyaveryabrupt:"Paidyourpassagemoneyyet?"
  Overcomebytheshamelesspertinacityofamantowhomitwasratherdifficulttoberude,IrepliedwithexaggeratedmeeknessthatIhadnotdonesoyet。Ithoughttherewouldbeplentyoftimetodothatto-morrow。
  AndIwasabouttoturnaway,withdrawingmyprivacyfromhisfatuous,objectlessattemptstotestwhatsortofstuffitwasmadeof,whenhelaiddownhispipeinanextremelysignificantmanner,youknow,asifacriticalmomenthadcome,andleanedsidewaysoverthetablebe-
  tweenus。
  "Oh!Youhaven’tyet!"Hedroppedhisvoicemysteriously。"Well,thenIthinkyououghttoknowthatthere’ssomethinggoingonhere。"
  Ihadneverinmylifefeltmoredetachedfromallearthlygoingson。Freedfromtheseaforatime,Ipreservedthesailor’sconsciousnessofcompleteindependencefromalllandaffairs。
  Howcouldtheyconcernme?IgazedatCaptainGiles’animationwithscornratherthanwithcuriosity。
  TohisobviouslypreparatoryquestionwhetherourStewardhadspokentomethatdayIsaidhehadn’t。Andwhat’smorehewouldhavehadpreciouslittleencouragementifhehadtriedto。
  Ididn’twantthefellowtospeaktomeatall。
  Unrebukedbymypetulance,CaptainGiles,withanairofimmensesagacity,begantotellmeaminutetaleaboutaHarbourOfficepeon。Itwasabsolutelypointless。Apeonwasseenwalk-
  ingthatmorningontheverandahwithaletterinhishand。Itwasinanofficialenvelope。Asthehabitofthesefellowsis,hehadshownittothefirstwhitemanhecameacross。Thatmanwasourfriendinthearm-chair。He,asIknew,wasnotinastatetointeresthimselfinanysub-
  lunarymatters。Hecouldonlywavethepeonaway。ThepeonthenwanderedonalongtheverandahandcameuponCaptainGiles,whowastherebyanextraordinarychance……
  Atthispointhestoppedwithaprofoundlook。
  Theletter,hecontinued,wasaddressedtotheChiefSteward。NowwhatcouldCaptainEllis,theMasterAttendant,wanttowritetotheStewardfor?Thefellowwenteverymorning,anyhow,totheHarbourOfficewithhisreport,forordersorwhatnot。Hehadn’tbeenbackmorethananhourbeforetherewasanofficepeonchasinghimwithanote。Nowwhatwasthatfor?
  Andhebegantospeculate。Itwasnotforthis——anditcouldnotbeforthat。Astothatotherthingitwasunthinkable。
  Thefatuousnessofallthismademestare。IfthemanhadnotbeensomehowasympatheticpersonalityIwouldhaveresenteditlikeanin-
  sult。Asitwas,Ifeltonlysorryforhim。Some-
  thingremarkablyearnestinhisgazepreventedmefromlaughinginhisface。NeitherdidI
  yawnathim。Ijuststared。
  Histonebecameashademoremysterious。
  Directlythefellow(meaningtheSteward)gotthatnoteherushedforhishatandboltedoutofthehouse。Butitwasn’tbecausethenotecalledhimtotheHarbourOffice。Hedidn’tgothere。
  Hewasnotabsentlongenoughforthat。Hecamedartingbackinnotime,flunghishataway,andracedaboutthediningroommoaningandslappinghisforehead。Alltheseexcitingfactsandmani-
  festationshadbeenobservedbyCaptainGiles。
  Hehad,itseems,beenmeditatinguponthemeversince。
  Ibegantopityhimprofoundly。AndinatonewhichItriedtomakeaslittlesarcasticaspossibleIsaidthatIwasgladhehadfoundsomethingtooccupyhismorninghours。
  Withhisdisarmingsimplicityhemademeob-
  serve,asifitwereamatterofsomeconsequence,howstrangeitwasthatheshouldhavespentthemorningindoorsatall。Hegenerallywasoutbeforetiffin,visitingvariousoffices,seeinghisfriendsintheharbour,andsoon。Hehadfeltoutofsortssomewhatonrising。Nothingmuch。
  Justenoughtomakehimfeellazy。
  Allthiswithasustained,holdingstarewhich,inconjunctionwiththegeneralinanityofthediscourse,conveyedtheimpressionofmild,drearylunacy。Andwhenhehitchedhischairalittleanddroppedhisvoicetothelownoteofmystery,itflasheduponmethathighprofessionalreputa-
  tionwasnotnecessarilyaguaranteeofsoundmind。
  ItneveroccurredtomethenthatIdidn’tknowinwhatsoundnessofmindexactlycon-
  sistedandwhatadelicateand,uponthewhole,unimportantmatteritwas。WithsomeideaofnothurtinghisfeelingsIblinkedathiminaninterestedmanner。ButwhenheproceededtoaskmemysteriouslywhetherIrememberedwhathadpassedjustnowbetweenthatStewardofoursand"thatmanHamilton,"Ionlygruntedsourlyassentandturnedawaymyhead。
  "Aye。Butdoyouremembereveryword?"heinsistedtactfully。
  "Idon’tknow。It’snoneofmybusiness,"I
  snappedout,consigning,moreover,theStewardandHamiltonaloudtoeternalperdition。
  Imeanttobeveryenergeticandfinal,butCaptainGilescontinuedtogazeatmethought-
  fully。Nothingcouldstophim。Hewentontopointoutthatmypersonalitywasinvolvedinthatconversation。WhenItriedtopreservethesemblanceofunconcernhebecamepositivelycruel。Iheardwhatthemanhadsaid?Yes?
  WhatdidIthinkofitthen?——hewantedtoknow。
  CaptainGiles’appearanceexcludingthesus-
  picionofmereslymalice,Icametotheconclusionthathewassimplythemosttactlessidiotonearth。
  Ialmostdespisedmyselffortheweaknessofattemptingtoenlightenhiscommonunderstand-
  ing。IstartedtoexplainthatIdidnotthinkanythingwhatever。Hamiltonwasnotworthathought。Whatsuchanoffensiveloafer……
  "Aye!thatheis,"interjectedCaptainGiles……thoughtorsaidwasbelowanydecentman’scontempt,andIdidnotproposetotaketheslightestnoticeofit。
  Thisattitudeseemedtomesosimpleandob-
  viousthatIwasreallyastonishedatGilesgivingnosignofassent。Suchperfectstupiditywasalmostinteresting。
  "Whatwouldyoulikemetodo?"Iasked,laughing。"Ican’tstartarowwithhimbecauseoftheopinionhehasformedofme。Ofcourse,I’veheardofthecontemptuouswayhealludestome。Buthedoesn’tintrudehiscontemptonmynotice。Hehasneverexpresseditinmyhearing。Forevenjustnowhedidn’tknowwecouldhearhim。Ishouldonlymakemyselfridiculous。"
  ThathopelessGileswentonpuffingathispipemoodily。Allatoncehisfacecleared,andhespoke。
  "Youmissedmypoint。"
  "HaveI?Iamverygladtohearit,"Isaid。
  WithincreasinganimationhestatedagainthatIhadmissedhispoint。Entirely。Andinatoneofgrowingself-consciouscomplacencyhetoldmethatfewthingsescapedhisattention,andhewasratherusedtothinkthemout,andgenerallyfromhisexperienceoflifeandmenar-
  rivedattherightconclusion。
  Thisbitofself-praise,ofcourse,fittedexcel-
  lentlythelaboriousinanityofthewholeconversa-
  tion。Thewholethingstrengthenedinmethatobscurefeelingoflifebeingbutawasteofdays,which,half-unconsciously,haddrivenmeoutofacomfortableberth,awayfrommenIliked,tofleefromthemenaceofemptiness……andtofindinanityatthefirstturn。Herewasamanofrecognizedcharacterandachievementdisclosedasanabsurdanddrearychatterer。Anditwasprobablylikethiseverywhere——fromeasttowest,fromthebottomtothetopofthesocialscale。
  Agreatdiscouragementfellonme。Aspiritualdrowsiness。Giles’voicewasgoingoncompla-
  cently;theveryvoiceoftheuniversalhollowconceit。AndIwasnolongerangrywithit。
  Therewasnothingoriginal,nothingnew,star-
  tling,informing,toexpectfromtheworld;noop-
  portunitiestofindoutsomethingaboutoneself,nowisdomtoacquire,nofuntoenjoy。Every-
  thingwasstupidandoverrated,evenasCaptainGileswas。Sobeit。
  ThenameofHamiltonsuddenlycaughtmyearandrousedmeup。
  "Ithoughtwehaddonewithhim,"Isaid,withthegreatestpossibledistaste。
  "Yes。ButconsideringwhatwehappenedtohearjustnowIthinkyououghttodoit。"
  "Oughttodoit?"Isatupbewildered。"Dowhat?"
  CaptainGilesconfrontedmeverymuchsur-
  prised。
  "Why!DowhatIhavebeenadvisingyoutotry。YougoandasktheStewardwhatwasthereinthatletterfromtheHarbourOffice。Askhimstraightout。"
  Iremainedspeechlessforatime。Herewassomethingunexpectedandoriginalenoughtobealtogetherincomprehensible。Imurmured,as-
  tounded:
  "ButIthoughtitwasHamiltonthatyou……"
  "Exactly。Don’tyoulethim。YoudowhatI
  tellyou。YoutacklethatSteward。You’llmakehimjump,Ibet,"insistedCaptainGiles,wavinghissmoulderingpipeimpressivelyatme。Thenhetookthreerapidpuffsatit。
  Hisaspectoftriumphantacutenesswasinde-
  scribable。Yetthemanremainedastrangelysympatheticcreature。Benevolenceradiatedfromhimridiculously,mildly,impressively。Itwasirritating,too。ButIpointedoutcoldly,asonewhodealswiththeincomprehensible,thatI
  didn’tseeanyreasontoexposemyselftoasnubfromthefellow。Hewasaveryunsatisfactorystewardandamiserablewretchbesides,butI
  wouldjustassoonthinkoftweakinghisnose。
  "Tweakinghisnose,"saidCaptainGilesinascandalizedtone。"Muchuseitwouldbetoyou。"
  Thatremarkwassoirrelevantthatonecouldmakenoanswertoit。Butthesenseoftheab-
  surditywasbeginningatlasttoexerciseitswell-
  knownfascination。IfeltImustnotletthemantalktomeanymore。Igotup,observingcurtlythathewastoomuchforme——thatI
  couldn’tmakehimout。
  BeforeIhadtimetomoveawayhespokeagaininachangedtoneofobstinacyandpuffingnervouslyathispipe。
  "Well——he’sa——noaccountcuss——anyhow。
  Youjust——askhim。That’sall。"
  Thatnewmannerimpressedme——orrathermademepause。ButsanityassertingitsswayatonceIlefttheverandahaftergivinghimamirthlesssmile。InafewstridesIfoundmyselfinthediningroom,nowclearedandempty。Butduringthatshorttimevariousthoughtsoccurredtome,suchas:thatGileshadbeenmakingfunofme,expectingsomeamusementatmyexpense;
  thatIprobablylookedsillyandgullible;thatI
  knewverylittleoflife……
  Thedoorfacingmeacrossthediningroomflewopentomyextremesurprise。Itwasthedoorinscribedwiththeword"Steward"andthemanhimselfranoutofhisstuffy,Philistinishlairinhisabsurd,hunted-animalmanner,makingforthegardendoor。
  TothisdayIdon’tknowwhatmademecallafterhim。"Isay!Waitaminute。"Perhapsitwasthesidelongglancehegaveme;orpossiblyIwasyetundertheinfluenceofCaptainGiles’
  mysteriousearnestness。Well,itwasanimpulseofsomesort;aneffectofthatforcesomewherewithinourliveswhichshapesthemthiswayorthat。Forifthesewordshadnotescapedfrommylips(mywillhadnothingtodowiththat)myexistencewould,tobesure,havebeenstillasea-
  man’sexistence,butdirectedonnowtomeutterlyinconceivablelines。
  No。Mywillhadnothingtodowithit。In-
  deed,nosoonerhadImadethatfatefulnoisethanIbecameextremelysorryforit。HadthemanstoppedandfacedmeIwouldhavehadtoretireindisorder。ForIhadnonotiontocarryoutCaptainGiles’idioticjoke,eitheratmyownexpenseorattheexpenseoftheSteward。
  Butheretheoldhumaninstinctofthechasecameintoplay。Hepretendedtobedeaf,andI,withoutthinkingasecondaboutit,dashedalongmyownsideofthediningtableandcuthimoffattheverydoor。
  "Whycan’tyouanswerwhenyouarespokento?"Iaskedroughly。
  Heleanedagainstthelintelofthedoor。Helookedextremelywretched。Humannatureis,I
  fear,notverynicerightthrough。Thereareuglyspotsinit。Ifoundmyselfgrowingangry,andthat,Ibelieve,onlybecausemyquarrylookedsowoe-begone。Miserablebeggar!
  Iwentforhimwithoutmoreado。"Iunder-
  standtherewasanofficialcommunicationtotheHomefromtheHarbourOfficethismorning。Isthatso?"
  Insteadoftellingmetomindmyownbusiness,ashemighthavedone,hebegantowhinewithanundertoneofimpudence。Hecouldn’tseemeanywherethismorning。Hecouldn’tbeexpectedtorunalloverthetownafterme。
  "Whowantsyouto?"Icried。Andthenmyeyesbecameopenedtotheinwardnessofthingsandspeechesthetrivialityofwhichhadbeensobafflingandtiresome。
  ItoldhimIwantedtoknowwhatwasinthatletter。Mysternnessoftoneandbehaviourwasonlyhalfassumed。Curiositycanbeaveryfiercesentiment——attimes。
  Hetookrefugeinasilly,mutteringsulkiness。
  Itwasnothingtome,hemumbled。IhadtoldhimIwasgoinghome。AndsinceIwasgoinghomehedidn’tseewhyheshould……
  Thatwasthelineofhisargument,anditwasirrelevantenoughtobealmostinsulting。Insult-
  ingtoone’sintelligence,Imean。
  Inthattwilightregionbetweenyouthandmaturity,inwhichIhadmybeingthen,oneispeculiarlysensitivetothatkindofinsult。IamafraidmybehaviourtotheStewardbecameveryroughindeed。Butitwasn’tinhimtofaceoutanythingoranybody。Drughabitorsolitarytippling,perhaps。AndwhenIforgotmyselfsofarastoswearathimhebrokedownandbegantoshriek。
  Idon’tmeantosaythathemadeagreatout-
  cry。Itwasacynicalshriekingconfession,onlyfaint——piteouslyfaint。Itwasn’tverycoherenteither,butsufficientlysotostrikemedumbatfirst。
  Iturnedmyeyesfromhiminrighteousindig-
  nation,andperceivedCaptainGilesintheve-
  randahdoorwaysurveyingquietlythescene,hisownhandiwork,ifImayexpressitinthatway。
  Hissmoulderingblackpipewasverynoticeableinhisbig,paternalfist。So,too,wastheglitterofhisheavygoldwatch-chainacrossthebreastofhiswhitetunic。Heexhaledanatmosphereofvirtu-
  oussagacitysereneenoughforanyinnocentsoultoflytoconfidently。Iflewtohim。
  "Youwouldneverbelieveit,"Icried。"Itwasanotificationthatamasteriswantedforsomeship。There’sacommandapparentlygoingaboutandthisfellowputsthethinginhispocket。"
  TheStewardscreamedoutinaccentsoflouddespair:"Youwillbethedeathofme!"
  Themightyslaphegavehiswretchedforeheadwasveryloud,too。ButwhenIturnedtolookathimhewasnolongerthere。Hehadrushedawaysomewhereoutofsight。Thissuddendisappear-
  ancemademelaugh。
  Thiswastheendoftheincident——forme。
  CaptainGiles,however,staringattheplacewheretheStewardhadbeen,begantohaulathisgor-
  geousgoldchaintillatlastthewatchcameupfromthedeeppocketlikesolidtruthfromawell。
  Solemnlyhelowereditdownagainandonlythensaid:
  "Justthreeo’clock。Youwillbeintime——ifyoudon’tloseany,thatis。"
  "Intimeforwhat?"Iasked。
  "GoodLord!FortheHarbourOffice。Thismustbelookedinto。
  Strictlyspeaking,hewasright。ButI’veneverhadmuchtasteforinvestigation,forshowingpeopleupandallthatnodoubtethicallymeri-
  toriouskindofwork。Andmyviewoftheepisodewaspurelyethical。IfanyonehadtobethedeathoftheStewardIdidn’tseewhyitshouldn’tbeCaptainGileshimself,amanofageandstanding,andapermanentresident。Whereas,Iincom-
  parison,feltmyselfamerebirdofpassageinthatport。Infact,itmighthavebeensaidthatIhadalreadybrokenoffmyconnection。ImutteredthatIdidn’tthink——itwasnothingtome……
  "Nothing!"repeatedCaptainGiles,givingsomesignsofquiet,deliberateindignation。"Kentwarnedmeyouwereapeculiaryoungfellow。Youwilltellmenextthatacommandisnothingtoyou——andafterallthetroubleI’vetaken,too!"
  "Thetrouble!"Imurmured,uncomprehending。
  Whattrouble?AllIcouldrememberwasbeingmystifiedandboredbyhisconversationforasolidhouraftertiffin。Andhecalledthattakingalotoftrouble。
  Hewaslookingatmewithaself-complacencywhichwouldhavebeenodiousinanyotherman。
  Allatonce,asifapageofabookhadbeenturnedoverdisclosingawordwhichmadeplainallthathadgonebefore,Iperceivedthatthismatterhadalsoanotherthananethicalaspect。
  AndstillIdidnotmove。CaptainGileslosthispatiencealittle。Withanangrypuffathispipeheturnedhisbackonmyhesitation。
  Butitwasnothesitationonmypart。Ihadbeen,ifImayexpressmyselfso,putoutofgearmentally。ButassoonasIhadconvincedmy-
  selfthatthisstale,unprofitableworldofmydis-
  contentcontainedsuchathingasacommandtobeseized,Irecoveredmypowersoflocomo-
  tion。
  It’sagoodstepfromtheOfficers’HometotheHarbourOffice;butwiththemagicword"Com-
  mand"inmyheadIfoundmyselfsuddenlyonthequayasiftransportedthereinthetwinklingofaneye,beforeaportalofdressedwhitestoneaboveaflightofshallowwhitesteps。
  Allthisseemedtoglidetowardmeswiftly。Thewholegreatroadsteadtotherightwasjustamereflickerofblue,andthedimcoolhallswallowedmeupoutoftheheatandglareofwhichIhadnotbeenawaretilltheverymomentIpassedinfromit。
  Thebroadinnerstaircaseinsinuateditselfundermyfeetsomehow。Commandisastrongmagic。
  ThefirsthumanbeingsIperceiveddistinctlysinceIhadpartedwiththeindignantbackofCaptainGileswerethecrewoftheharboursteam-launchloungingonthespaciouslandingaboutthecur-
  tainedarchwayoftheshippingoffice。
  Itwastherethatmybuoyancyabandonedme。
  Theatmosphereofofficialdomwouldkillanythingthatbreathestheairofhumanendeavour,wouldextinguishhopeandfearalikeinthesupremacyofpaperandink。IpassedheavilyunderthecurtainwhichtheMalaycoxswainoftheharbourlaunchraisedforme。Therewasnobodyintheofficeexcepttheclerks,writingintwoindustriousrows。
  ButtheheadShipping-Masterhoppeddownfromhiselevationandhurriedalongonthethickmatstomeetmeinthebroadcentralpassage。
  HehadaScottishname,buthiscomplexionwasofaricholivehue,hisshortbeardwasjetblack,andhiseyes,alsoblack,hadalanguishingex-
  pression。Heaskedconfidentially:
  "YouwanttoseeHim?"
  Alllightnessofspiritandbodyhavingdepartedfrommeatthetouchofofficialdom,Ilookedatthescribewithoutanimationandaskedinmyturnwearily:
  "Whatdoyouthink?Isitanyuse?"
  "Mygoodness!Hehasaskedforyoutwiceto-
  day。"
  ThisemphaticHewasthesupremeauthority,theMarineSuperintendent,theHarbour-Master——averygreatpersonintheeyesofeverysinglequill-driverintheroom。Butthatwasnothingtotheopinionhehadofhisowngreatness。
  CaptainEllislookeduponhimselfasasortofdivine(pagan)emanation,thedeputy-Neptuneforthecircumambientseas。Ifhedidnotactuallyrulethewaves,hepretendedtorulethefateofthemortalswhoseliveswerecastuponthewaters。
  Thisupliftingillusionmadehiminquisitorialandperemptory。Andashistemperamentwascholerictherewerefellowswhowereactuallyafraidofhim。Hewasredoubtable,notinvirtueofhisoffice,butbecauseofhisunwarrantableassump-
  tions。Ihadneverhadanythingtodowithhimbefore。
  Isaid:"Oh!Hehasaskedformetwice。ThenperhapsIhadbettergoin。"
  "Youmust!Youmust!"
  TheShipping-Masterledthewaywithamincinggaitaroundthewholesystemofdeskstoatallandimportant-lookingdoor,whichheopenedwithadeferentialactionofthearm。
  Hesteppedrightin(butwithoutlettinggoofthehandle)and,aftergazingreverentlydowntheroomforawhile,beckonedmeinbyasilentjerkofthehead。Thenheslippedoutatonceandshutthedooraftermemostdelicately。
  Threeloftywindowsgaveontheharbour。
  Therewasnothinginthembutthedark-bluesparklingseaandthepalerluminousblueofthesky。Myeyecaughtinthedepthsanddistancesofthesebluetonesthewhitespeckofsomebigshipjustarrivedandabouttoanchorintheouterroad-
  stead。Ashipfromhome——afterperhapsninetydaysatsea。Thereissomethingtouchingaboutashipcominginfromseaandfoldingherwhitewingsforarest。
  ThenextthingIsawwasthetop-knotofsilverhairsurmountingCaptainEllis’smoothredface,whichwouldhavebeenapoplecticifithadn’thadsuchafreshappearance。
  Ourdeputy-Neptunehadnobeardonhischin,andtherewasnotridenttobeseenstandinginacorneranywhere,likeanumbrella。Buthishandwasholdingapen——theofficialpen,farmightierthantheswordinmakingormarringthefortuneofsimpletoilingmen。Hewaslookingoverhisshoulderatmyadvance。
  WhenIhadcomewellwithinrangehesalutedmebyanerve-shattering:"Wherehaveyoubeenallthistime?"
  AsitwasnoconcernofhisIdidnottaketheslightestnoticeoftheshot。IsaidsimplythatI
  hadheardtherewasamasterneededforsomevessel,andbeingasailing-shipmanIthoughtI
  wouldapply……
  Heinterruptedme。"Why!Hangit!YOUaretherightmanforthatjob——iftherehadbeentwentyothersafterit。Butnofearofthat。Theyareallafraidtocatchhold。That’swhat’sthematter。"
  Hewasveryirritated。Isaidinnocently:"Arethey,sir。Iwonderwhy?"
  "Why!"hefumed。"Afraidofthesails。
  Afraidofawhitecrew。Toomuchtrouble。Toomuchwork。Toolongouthere。Easylifeanddeck-chairsmoretheirmark。HereIsitwiththeConsul-General’scablebeforeme,andtheonlymanfitforthejobnottobefoundanywhere。I
  begantothinkyouwerefunkingit,too……"
  "Ihaven’tbeenlonggettingtotheoffice,"I
  remarkedcalmly。
  "Youhaveagoodnameouthere,though,"hegrowledsavagelywithoutlookingatme。
  "Iamverygladtohearitfromyou,sir,"Isaid。
  "Yes。Butyouarenotonthespotwhenyouarewanted。Youknowyouweren’t。Thatstew-
  ardofyourswouldn’tdaretoneglectamessagefromthisoffice。Wherethedevildidyouhideyourselfforthebestpartoftheday?"
  Ionlysmiledkindlydownonhim,andheseemedtorecollecthimself,andaskedmetotakeaseat。HeexplainedthatthemasterofaBritishshiphavingdiedinBangkoktheConsul-Generalhadcabledtohimarequestforacompetentmantobesentouttotakecommand。
  Apparently,inhismind,Iwasthemanfromthefirst,thoughforthelooksofthethingthenotifica-
  tionaddressedtotheSailors’Homewasgeneral。
  Anagreementhadalreadybeenprepared。Hegaveittometoread,andwhenIhandeditbacktohimwiththeremarkthatIaccepteditsterms,thedeputy-Neptunesignedit,stampeditwithhisownexaltedhand,foldeditinfour(itwasasheetofbluefoolscap)andpresentedittome——agiftofex-
  traordinarypotency,for,asIputitinmypocket,myheadswamalittle。
  "Thisisyourappointmenttothecommand,"hesaidwithacertaingravity。"Anofficialappoint-
  mentbindingtheownerstoconditionswhichyouhaveaccepted。Now——whenwillyoubereadytogo?"
  IsaidIwouldbereadythatverydayifneces-
  sary。Hecaughtmeatmywordwithgreatalacrity。ThesteamerMelitawasleavingforBangkokthateveningaboutseven。Hewouldrequesthercaptainofficiallytogivemeapassageandwaitformetillteno’clock。
  Thenherosefromhisofficechair,andIgotup,too。Myheadswam,therewasnodoubtaboutit,andIfeltacertainheavinessoflimbsasiftheyhadgrownbiggersinceIhadsatdownonthatchair。Imademybow。
  AsubtlechangeinCaptainEllis’mannerbecameperceptibleasthoughhehadlaidasidethetridentofdeputy-Neptune。Inreality,itwasonlyhisofficialpenthathehaddroppedongettingup。