I
Onmyrighthandtherewerelinesoffishingstakesresemblingamysterioussystemofhalf-submergedbamboofences,incomprehensibleinitsdivisionofthedomainoftropicalfishes,andcrazyofaspectasifabandonedforeverbysomenomadtribeoffishermennowgonetotheotherendoftheocean;
fortherewasnosignofhumanhabitationasfarastheeyecouldreach。Totheleftagroupofbarrenislets,suggestingruinsofstonewalls,towers,andblockhouses,haditsfoundationssetinablueseathatitselflookedsolid,sostillandstablediditliebelowmyfeet;eventhetrackoflightfromthewesteringsunshonesmoothly,withoutthatanimatedglitterwhichtellsofanimperceptibleripple。
AndwhenIturnedmyheadtotakeapartingglanceatthetugwhichhadjustleftusanchoredoutsidethebar,Isawthestraightlineoftheflatshorejoinedtothestablesea,edgetoedge,withaperfectandunmarkedcloseness,inoneleveledfloorhalfbrown,halfblueundertheenormousdomeofthesky。
Correspondingintheirinsignificancetotheisletsofthesea,twosmallclumpsoftrees,oneoneachsideoftheonlyfaultintheimpeccablejoint,markedthemouthoftheriverMeinamwehadjustleftonthefirstpreparatorystageofourhomewardjourney;and,farbackontheinlandlevel,alargerandloftiermass,thegrovesurroundingthegreatPaknampagoda,wastheonlythingonwhichtheeyecouldrestfromthevaintaskofexploringthemonotonoussweepofthehorizon。
Hereandtheregleamsasofafewscatteredpiecesofsilvermarkedthewindingsofthegreatriver;andonthenearestofthem,justwithinthebar,thetugsteamingrightintothelandbecamelosttomysight,hullandfunnelandmasts,asthoughtheimpassiveearthhadswallowedherupwithoutaneffort,withoutatremor。
Myeyefollowedthelightcloudofhersmoke,nowhere,nowthere,abovetheplain,accordingtothedeviouscurvesofthestream,butalwaysfainterandfartheraway,tillIlostitatlastbehindthemiter-shapedhillofthegreatpagoda。
AndthenIwasleftalonewithmyship,anchoredattheheadoftheGulfofSiam。
Shefloatedatthestartingpointofalongjourney,verystillinanimmensestillness,theshadowsofhersparsflungfartotheeastwardbythesettingsun。AtthatmomentIwasaloneonherdecks。
Therewasnotasoundinher——andaroundusnothingmoved,nothinglived,notacanoeonthewater,notabirdintheair,notacloudinthesky。
Inthisbreathlesspauseatthethresholdofalongpassageweseemedtobemeasuringourfitnessforalongandarduousenterprise,theappointedtaskofbothourexistencestobecarriedout,farfromallhumaneyes,withonlyskyandseaforspectatorsandforjudges。
Theremusthavebeensomeglareintheairtointerferewithone’ssight,becauseitwasonlyjustbeforethesunleftusthatmyroamingeyesmadeoutbeyondthehighestridgesoftheprincipalisletofthegroupsomethingwhichdidawaywiththesolemnityofperfectsolitude。
Thetideofdarknessflowedonswiftly;andwithtropicalsuddennessaswarmofstarscameoutabovetheshadowyearth,whileIlingeredyet,myhandrestinglightlyonmyship’srailasifontheshoulderofatrustedfriend。But,withallthatmultitudeofcelestialbodiesstaringdownatone,thecomfortofquietcommunionwithherwasgoneforgood。
Andtherewerealsodisturbingsoundsbythistime——voices,footstepsforward;
thestewardflittedalongthemain-deck,abusilyministeringspirit;
ahandbelltinkledurgentlyunderthepoopdeck……
Ifoundmytwoofficerswaitingformenearthesuppertable,inthelightedcuddy。Wesatdownatonce,andasIhelpedthechiefmate,Isaid:
"Areyouawarethatthereisashipanchoredinsidetheislands?
Isawhermastheadsabovetheridgeasthesunwentdown。"
Heraisedsharplyhissimpleface,overchargedbyaterriblegrowthofwhisker,andemittedhisusualejaculations:
"Blessmysoul,sir!Youdon’tsayso!"
Mysecondmatewasaround-cheeked,silentyoungman,gravebeyondhisyears,Ithought;butasoureyeshappenedtomeetI
detectedaslightquiveronhislips。Ilookeddownatonce。
Itwasnotmyparttoencouragesneeringonboardmyship。
Itmustbesaid,too,thatIknewverylittleofmyofficers。
Inconsequenceofcertaineventsofnoparticularsignificance,excepttomyself,Ihadbeenappointedtothecommandonlyafortnightbefore。NeitherdidIknowmuchofthehandsforward。
Allthesepeoplehadbeentogetherforeighteenmonthsorso,andmypositionwasthatoftheonlystrangeronboard。
Imentionthisbecauseithassomebearingonwhatistofollow。
ButwhatIfeltmostwasmybeingastrangertotheship;
andifallthetruthmustbetold,Iwassomewhatofastrangertomyself。Theyoungestmanonboard(barringthesecondmate),anduntriedasyetbyapositionofthefullestresponsibility,Iwaswillingtotaketheadequacyoftheothersforgranted。
Theyhadsimplytobeequaltotheirtasks;butIwonderedhowfarIshouldturnoutfaithfultothatidealconceptionofone’sownpersonalityeverymansetsupforhimselfsecretly。
Meantimethechiefmate,withanalmostvisibleeffectofcollaborationonthepartofhisroundeyesandfrightfulwhiskers,wastryingtoevolveatheoryoftheanchoredship。Hisdominanttraitwastotakeallthingsintoearnestconsideration。Hewasofapainstakingturnofmind。
Asheusedtosay,he"likedtoaccounttohimself"forpracticallyeverythingthatcameinhisway,downtoamiserablescorpionhehadfoundinhiscabinaweekbefore。Thewhyandthewhereforeofthatscorpion——howitgotonboardandcametoselecthisroomratherthanthepantry(whichwasadarkplaceandmorewhatascorpionwouldbepartialto),andhowonearthitmanagedtodrownitselfintheinkwellofhiswritingdesk——hadexercisedhiminfinitely。
Theshipwithintheislandswasmuchmoreeasilyaccountedfor;
andjustaswewereabouttorisefromtablehemadehispronouncement。
Shewas,hedoubtednot,ashipfromhomelatelyarrived。Probablyshedrewtoomuchwatertocrossthebarexceptatthetopofspringtides。
Thereforeshewentintothatnaturalharbortowaitforafewdaysinpreferencetoremaininginanopenroadstead。
"That’sso,"confirmedthesecondmate,suddenly,inhisslightlyhoarsevoice。"Shedrawsovertwentyfeet。
She’stheLiverpoolshipSephorawithacargoofcoal。
Hundredandtwenty-threedaysfromCardiff。"
Welookedathiminsurprise。
"Thetugboatskippertoldmewhenhecameonboardforyourletters,sir,"explainedtheyoungman。
"Heexpectstotakeheruptheriverthedayaftertomorrow。"
Afterthusoverwhelminguswiththeextentofhisinformationheslippedoutofthecabin。Themateobservedregretfullythathe"couldnotaccountforthatyoungfellow’swhims。"
Whatpreventedhimtellingusallaboutitatonce,hewantedtoknow。
Idetainedhimashewasmakingamove。Forthelasttwodaysthecrewhadhadplentyofhardwork,andthenightbeforetheyhadverylittlesleep。
IfeltpainfullythatI——astranger——wasdoingsomethingunusualwhenI
directedhimtoletallhandsturninwithoutsettingananchorwatch。
Iproposedtokeepondeckmyselftilloneo’clockorthereabouts。
Iwouldgetthesecondmatetorelievemeatthathour。
"Hewillturnoutthecookandthestewardatfour,"Iconcluded,"andthengiveyouacall。Ofcourseattheslightestsignofanysortofwindwe’llhavethehandsupandmakeastartatonce。"
Heconcealedhisastonishment。"Verywell,sir。"Outsidethecuddyheputhisheadinthesecondmate’sdoortoinformhimofmyunheard-ofcapricetotakeafivehours’anchorwatchonmyself。
Iheardtheotherraisehisvoiceincredulously——"What?TheCaptainhimself?"Thenafewmoremurmurs,adoorclosed,thenanother。
AfewmomentslaterIwentondeck。
Mystrangeness,whichhadmademesleepless,hadpromptedthatunconventionalarrangement,asifIhadexpectedinthosesolitaryhoursofthenighttogetontermswiththeshipofwhichI
knewnothing,mannedbymenofwhomIknewverylittlemore。
Fastalongsideawharf,litteredlikeanyshipinportwithatangleofunrelatedthings,invadedbyunrelatedshorepeople,Ihadhardlyseenheryetproperly。Now,asshelayclearedforsea,thestretchofhermain-deckseemedtomeveryfindunderthestars。
Veryfine,veryroomyforhersize,andveryinviting。
Idescendedthepoopandpacedthewaist,mymindpicturingtomyselfthecomingpassagethroughtheMalayArchipelago,downtheIndianOcean,anduptheAtlantic。Allitsphaseswerefamiliarenoughtome,everycharacteristic,allthealternativeswhichwerelikelytofacemeonthehighseas——
everything!……exceptthenovelresponsibilityofcommand。
ButItookheartfromthereasonablethoughtthattheshipwaslikeotherships,themenlikeothermen,andthattheseawasnotlikelytokeepanyspecialsurprisesexpresslyformydiscomfiture。
Arrivedatthatcomfortingconclusion,Ibethoughtmyselfofacigarandwentbelowtogetit。Allwasstilldownthere。
Everybodyattheafterendoftheshipwassleepingprofoundly。
Icameoutagainonthequarter-deck,agreeablyateaseinmysleepingsuitonthatwarmbreathlessnight,barefooted,aglowingcigarinmyteeth,and,goingforward,Iwasmetbytheprofoundsilenceoftheforeendoftheship。OnlyasIpassedthedooroftheforecastle,Iheardadeep,quiet,trustfulsighofsomesleeperinside。
AndsuddenlyIrejoicedinthegreatsecurityoftheseaascomparedwiththeunrestoftheland,inmychoiceofthatuntemptedlifepresentingnodisquietingproblems,investedwithanelementarymoralbeautybytheabsolutestraightforwardnessofitsappealandbythesinglenessofitspurpose。
Theridinglightintheforeriggingburnedwithaclear,untroubled,asifsymbolic,flame,confidentandbrightinthemysteriousshadesofthenight。Passingonmywayaftalongtheothersideoftheship,Iobservedthattheropesideladder,putover,nodoubt,forthemasterofthetugwhenhecametofetchawayourletters,hadnotbeenhauledinasitshouldhavebeen。Ibecameannoyedatthis,forexactitudeinsomesmallmattersistheverysoulofdiscipline。
ThenIreflectedthatIhadmyselfperemptorilydismissedmyofficersfromduty,andbymyownacthadpreventedtheanchorwatchbeingformallysetandthingsproperlyattendedto。
Iaskedmyselfwhetheritwaswiseevertointerferewiththeestablishedroutineofdutiesevenfromthekindestofmotives。
Myactionmighthavemademeappeareccentric。Goodnessonlyknewhowthatabsurdlywhiskeredmatewould"account"formyconduct,andwhatthewholeshipthoughtofthatinformalityoftheirnewcaptain。
Iwasvexedwithmyself。
Notfromcompunctioncertainly,but,asitweremechanically,Iproceededtogettheladderinmyself。Nowasideladderofthatsortisalightaffairandcomesineasily,yetmyvigoroustug,whichshouldhavebroughtitflyingonboard,merelyrecoileduponmybodyinatotallyunexpectedjerk。
Whatthedevil!……IwassoastoundedbytheimmovablenessofthatladderthatIremainedstockstill,tryingtoaccountforittomyselflikethatimbecilemateofmine。
Intheend,ofcourse,Iputmyheadovertherail。
Thesideoftheshipmadeanopaquebeltofshadowonthedarklingglassyshimmerofthesea。ButIsawatoncesomethingelongatedandpalefloatingveryclosetotheladder。
BeforeIcouldformaguessafaintflashofphosphorescentlight,whichseemedtoissuesuddenlyfromthenakedbodyofaman,flickeredinthesleepingwaterwiththeelusive,silentplayofsummerlightninginanightsky。WithagaspIsawrevealedtomystareapairoffeet,thelonglegs,abroadlividbackimmersedrightuptotheneckinagreenishcadaverousglow。
Onehand,awash,clutchedthebottomrungoftheladder。
Hewascompletebutforthehead。Aheadlesscorpse!Thecigardroppedoutofmygapingmouthwithatinyplopandashorthissquiteaudibleintheabsolutestillnessofallthingsunderheaven。
AtthatIsupposeheraiseduphisface,adimlypaleovalintheshadowoftheship’sside。ButeventhenIcouldonlybarelymakeoutdowntheretheshapeofhisblack-hairedhead。
However,itwasenoughforthehorrid,frost-boundsensationwhichhadgrippedmeaboutthechesttopassoff。
Themomentofvainexclamationswaspast,too。IonlyclimbedonthesparesparandleanedovertherailasfarasIcould,tobringmyeyesnearertothatmysteryfloatingalongside。
Ashehungbytheladder,likearestingswimmer,thesealightningplayedabouthislimbsateverystir;andheappearedinitghastly,silvery,fishlike。Heremainedasmuteasafish,too。Hemadenomotiontogetoutofthewater,either。
Itwasinconceivablethatheshouldnotattempttocomeonboard,andstrangelytroublingtosuspectthatperhapshedidnotwantto。
Andmyfirstwordswerepromptedbyjustthattroubledincertitude。
"What’sthematter?"Iaskedinmyordinarytone,speakingdowntothefaceupturnedexactlyundermine。
"Cramp,"itanswered,nolouder。Thenslightlyanxious,"Isay,noneedtocallanyone。"
"Iwasnotgoingto,"Isaid。
"Areyoualoneondeck?"
"Yes。"
Ihadsomehowtheimpressionthathewasonthepointoflettinggotheladdertoswimawaybeyondmyken——mysteriousashecame。But,forthemoment,thisbeingappearingasifhehadrisenfromthebottomofthesea(itwascertainlythenearestlandtotheship)wantedonlytoknowthetime。
Itoldhim。Andhe,downthere,tentatively:
"Isupposeyourcaptain’sturnedin?"
"Iamsureheisn’t,"Isaid。
Heseemedtostrugglewithhimself,forIheardsomethinglikethelow,bittermurmurofdoubt。"What’sthegood?"
Hisnextwordscameoutwithahesitatingeffort。
"Lookhere,myman。Couldyoucallhimoutquietly?"
IthoughtthetimeHadcometodeclaremyself。
"Iamthecaptain。"
Ihearda"ByJove!"whisperedatthelevelofthewater。
Thephosphorescenceflashedintheswirlofthewaterallabouthislimbs,hisotherhandseizedtheladder。
"Myname’sLeggatt。"
Thevoicewascalmandresolute。Agoodvoice。Theself-possessionofthatmanhadsomehowinducedacorrespondingstateinmyself。
ItwasveryquietlythatIremarked:
"Youmustbeagoodswimmer。"
"Yes。I’vebeeninthewaterpracticallysincenineo’clock。
ThequestionformenowiswhetherIamtoletgothisladderandgoonswimmingtillIsinkfromexhaustion,or——tocomeonboardhere。"
Ifeltthiswasnomereformulaofdesperatespeech,butarealalternativeintheviewofastrongsoul。
Ishouldhavegatheredfromthisthathewasyoung;indeed,itisonlytheyoungwhoareeverconfrontedbysuchclearissues。
Butatthetimeitwaspureintuitiononmypart。
Amysteriouscommunicationwasestablishedalreadybetweenustwo——inthefaceofthatsilent,darkenedtropicalsea。
Iwasyoung,too;youngenoughtomakenocomment。
Themaninthewaterbegansuddenlytoclimbuptheladder,andIhastenedawayfromtherailtofetchsomeclothes。
BeforeenteringthecabinIstoodstill,listeninginthelobbyatthefootofthestairs。Afaintsnorecamethroughthecloseddoorofthechiefmate’sroom。Thesecondmate’sdoorwasonthehook,butthedarknessintherewasabsolutelysoundless。He,too,wasyoungandcouldsleeplikeastone。Remainedthesteward,buthewasnotlikelytowakeupbeforehewascalled。
Igotasleepingsuitoutofmyroomand,comingbackondeck,sawthenakedmanfromtheseasittingonthemainhatch,glimmeringwhiteinthedarkness,hiselbowsonhiskneesandhisheadinhishands。Inamomenthehadconcealedhisdampbodyinasleepingsuitofthesamegray-stripepatternastheoneIwaswearingandfollowedmelikemydoubleonthepoop。
Togetherwemovedrightaft,barefooted,silent。
"Whatisit?"Iaskedinadeadenedvoice,takingthelightedlampoutofthebinnacle,andraisingittohisface。
"Anuglybusiness。"
Hehadratherregularfeatures;agoodmouth;lighteyesundersomewhatheavy,darkeyebrows;asmooth,squareforehead;nogrowthonhischeeks;asmall,brownmustache,andawell-shaped,roundchin。
Hisexpressionwasconcentrated,meditative,undertheinspectinglightofthelampIhelduptohisface;suchasamanthinkinghardinsolitudemightwear。Mysleepingsuitwasjustrightforhissize。Awell-knityoungfellowoftwenty-fiveatmost。
Hecaughthislowerlipwiththeedgeofwhite,eventeeth。
"Yes,"Isaid,replacingthelampinthebinnacle。
Thewarm,heavytropicalnightcloseduponhisheadagain。
"There’sashipoverthere,"hemurmured。
"Yes,Iknow。TheSephora。Didyouknowofus?"
"Hadn’ttheslightestidea。Iamthemateofher——"
Hepausedandcorrectedhimself。"IshouldsayIWAS。"
"Aha!Somethingwrong?"
"Yes。Verywrongindeed。I’vekilledaman。"
"Whatdoyoumean?Justnow?"
"No,onthepassage。Weeksago。Thirty-ninesouth。
WhenIsayaman——"
"Fitoftemper,"Isuggested,confidently。
Theshadowy,darkhead,likemine,seemedtonodimperceptiblyabovetheghostlygrayofmysleepingsuit。Itwas,inthenight,asthoughIhadbeenfacedbymyownreflectioninthedepthsofasomberandimmensemirror。
"AprettythingtohavetoownuptoforaConwayboy,"
murmuredmydouble,distinctly。
"You’reaConwayboy?"
"Iam,"hesaid,asifstartled。Then,slowly……"Perhapsyoutoo——"
Itwasso;butbeingacoupleofyearsolderIhadleftbeforehejoined。Afteraquickinterchangeofdatesasilencefell;
andIthoughtsuddenlyofmyabsurdmatewithhisterrificwhiskersandthe"Blessmysoul——youdon’tsayso"typeofintellect。
Mydoublegavemeaninklingofhisthoughtsbysaying:
"Myfather’saparsoninNorfolk。Doyouseemebeforeajudgeandjuryonthatcharge?FormyselfIcan’tseethenecessity。
Therearefellowsthatanangelfromheaven——AndIamnotthat。
Hewasoneofthosecreaturesthatarejustsimmeringallthetimewithasillysortofwickedness。
Miserabledevilsthathavenobusinesstoliveatall。
Hewouldn’tdohisdutyandwouldn’tletanybodyelsedotheirs。
Butwhat’sthegoodoftalking!Youknowwellenoughthesortofill-conditionedsnarlingcur——"
Heappealedtomeasifourexperienceshadbeenasidenticalasourclothes。
AndIknewwellenoughthepestiferousdangerofsuchacharacterwheretherearenomeansoflegalrepression。AndIknewwellenoughalsothatmydoubletherewasnohomicidalruffian。Ididnotthinkofaskinghimfordetails,andhetoldmethestoryroughlyinbrusque,disconnectedsentences。
Ineedednomore。IsawitallgoingonasthoughIweremyselfinsidethatothersleepingsuit。
"Ithappenedwhileweweresettingareefedforesail,atdusk。
Reefedforesail!Youunderstandthesortofweather。Theonlysailwehadlefttokeeptheshiprunning;soyoumayguesswhatithadbeenlikefordays。Anxioussortofjob,that。Hegavemesomeofhiscursedinsolenceatthesheet。ItellyouIwasoverdonewiththisterrificweatherthatseemedtohavenoendtoit。Terrific,Itellyou——andadeepship。
Ibelievethefellowhimselfwashalfcrazedwithfunk。Itwasnotimeforgentlemanlyreproof,soIturnedroundandfelledhimlikeanox。
Heupandatme。Weclosedjustasanawfulseamadefortheship。
Allhandssawitcomingandtooktotherigging,butIhadhimbythethroat,andwentonshakinghimlikearat,themenaboveusyelling,`Lookout!lookout!’Thenacrashasiftheskyhadfallenonmyhead。
Theysaythatforovertenminuteshardlyanythingwastobeseenoftheship——justthethreemastsandabitoftheforecastleheadandofthepoopallawashdrivingalonginasmotheroffoam。
Itwasamiraclethattheyfoundus,jammedtogetherbehindtheforebitts。
It’sclearthatImeantbusiness,becauseIwasholdinghimbythethroatstillwhentheypickedusup。Hewasblackintheface。Itwastoomuchforthem。Itseemstheyrushedusafttogether,grippedaswewere,screaming`Murder!’likealotoflunatics,andbrokeintothecuddy。
Andtheshiprunningforherlife,touchandgoallthetime,anyminuteherlastinaseafittoturnyourhairgrayonlya-lookingatit。
Iunderstandthattheskipper,too,startedravingliketherestofthem。
Themanhadbeendeprivedofsleepformorethanaweek,andtohavethissprungonhimattheheightofafuriousgalenearlydrovehimoutofhismind。Iwondertheydidn’tflingmeoverboardaftergettingthecarcassoftheirpreciousshipmateoutofmyfingers。
Theyhadratherajobtoseparateus,I’vebeentold。Asufficientlyfiercestorytomakeanoldjudgeandarespectablejurysitupabit。
ThefirstthingIheardwhenIcametomyselfwasthemaddeninghowlingofthatendlessgale,andonthatthevoiceoftheoldman。
Hewashangingontomybunk,staringintomyfaceoutofhissou’wester。
"`Mr。Leggatt,youhavekilledaman。Youcanactnolongeraschiefmateofthisship。’"
Hiscaretosubduehisvoicemadeitsoundmonotonous。
Herestedahandontheendoftheskylighttosteadyhimselfwith,andallthattimedidnotstiralimb,sofarasIcouldsee。
"Nicelittletaleforaquietteaparty,"heconcludedinthesametone。
Oneofmyhands,too,restedontheendoftheskylight;neitherdidIstiralimb,sofarasIknew。Westoodlessthanafootfromeachother。
Itoccurredtomethatifold"Blessmysoul——youdon’tsayso"
weretoputhisheadupthecompanionandcatchsightofus,hewouldthinkhewasseeingdouble,orimaginehimselfcomeuponasceneofweirdwitchcraft;thestrangecaptainhavingaquietconfabulationbythewheelwithhisowngrayghost。
Ibecameverymuchconcernedtopreventanythingofthesort。
Iheardtheother’ssoothingundertone。
"Myfather’saparsoninNorfolk,"itsaid。Evidentlyhehadforgottenhehadtoldmethisimportantfactbefore。
Trulyanicelittletale。
"Youhadbetterslipdownintomystateroomnow,"Isaid,movingoffstealthily。Mydoublefollowedmymovements;
ourbarefeetmadenosound;Ilethimin,closedthedoorwithcare,and,aftergivingacalltothesecondmate,returnedondeckformyrelief。
"Notmuchsignofanywindyet,"Iremarkedwhenheapproached。
"No,sir。Notmuch,"heassented,sleepily,inhishoarsevoice,withjustenoughdeference,nomore,andbarelysuppressingayawn。
"Well,that’sallyouhavetolookoutfor。Youhavegotyourorders。"
"Yes,sir。"
IpacedaturnortwoonthepoopandsawhimtakeuphispositionfaceforwardwithhiselbowintheratlinesofthemizzenriggingbeforeI
wentbelow。Themate’sfaintsnoringwasstillgoingonpeacefully。
Thecuddylampwasburningoverthetableonwhichstoodavasewithflowers,apoliteattentionfromtheship’sprovisionmerchant——
thelastflowersweshouldseeforthenextthreemonthsattheveryleast。
Twobunchesofbananashungfromthebeamsymmetrically,oneoneachsideoftheruddercasing。Everythingwasasbeforeintheship——
exceptthattwoofhercaptain’ssleepingsuitsweresimultaneouslyinuse,onemotionlessinthecuddy,theotherkeepingverystillinthecaptain’sstateroom。
ItmustbeexplainedherethatmycabinhadtheformofthecapitalletterL,thedoorbeingwithintheangleandopeningintotheshortpartoftheletter。Acouchwastotheleft,thebedplacetotheright;
mywritingdeskandthechronometers’tablefacedthedoor。
Butanyoneopeningit,unlesshesteppedrightinside,hadnoviewofwhatIcallthelong(orvertical)partoftheletter。
Itcontainedsomelockerssurmountedbyabookcase;andafewclothes,athickjacketortwo,caps,oilskincoat,andsuchlike,hungonhooks。
Therewasatthebottomofthatpartadooropeningintomybathroom,whichcouldbeenteredalsodirectlyfromthesaloon。
Butthatwaywasneverused。
Themysteriousarrivalhaddiscoveredtheadvantageofthisparticularshape。
Enteringmyroom,lightedstronglybyabigbulkheadlampswungongimbalsabovemywritingdesk,Ididnotseehimanywheretillhesteppedoutquietlyfrombehindthecoatshungintherecessedpart。
"Iheardsomebodymovingabout,andwentinthereatonce,"hewhispered。
I,too,spokeundermybreath。
"Nobodyislikelytocomeinherewithoutknockingandgettingpermission。"
Henodded。Hisfacewasthinandthesunburnfaded,asthoughhehadbeenill。Andnowonder。Hehadbeen,Iheardpresently,keptunderarrestinhiscabinfornearlysevenweeks。
Buttherewasnothingsicklyinhiseyesorinhisexpression。
Hewasnotabitlikeme,really;yet,aswestoodleaningovermybedplace,whisperingsidebyside,withourdarkheadstogetherandourbackstothedoor,anybodyboldenoughtoopenitstealthilywouldhavebeentreatedtotheuncannysightofadoublecaptainbusytalkinginwhisperswithhisotherself。
"Butallthisdoesn’ttellmehowyoucametohangontooursideladder,"
Iinquired,inthehardlyaudiblemurmursweused,afterhehadtoldmesomethingmoreoftheproceedingsonboardtheSephoraoncethebadweatherwasover。
"WhenwesightedJavaHeadIhadhadtimetothinkallthosemattersoutseveraltimesover。Ihadsixweeksofdoingnothingelse,andwithonlyanhourorsoeveryeveningforatramponthequarter-deck。"
Hewhispered,hisarmsfoldedonthesideofmybedplace,staringthroughtheopenport。AndIcouldimagineperfectlythemannerofthisthinkingout——
astubbornifnotasteadfastoperation;somethingofwhichIshouldhavebeenperfectlyincapable。
"Ireckoneditwouldbedarkbeforeweclosedwiththeland,"
hecontinued,solowthatIhadtostrainmyhearingnearasweweretoeachother,shouldertouchingshoulderalmost。
"SoIaskedtospeaktotheoldman。Healwaysseemedverysickwhenhecametoseeme——asifhecouldnotlookmeintheface。Youknow,thatforesailsavedtheship。
Shewastoodeeptohaverunlongunderbarepoles。
AnditwasIthatmanagedtosetitforhim。Anyway,hecame。
WhenIhadhiminmycabin——hestoodbythedoorlookingatmeasifIhadthehalterroundmyneckalready——
IaskedhimrightawaytoleavemycabindoorunlockedatnightwhiletheshipwasgoingthroughSundaStraits。
TherewouldbetheJavacoastwithintwoorthreemiles,offAngierPoint。Iwantednothingmore。I’vehadaprizeforswimmingmysecondyearintheConway。"
"Icanbelieveit,"Ibreathedout。
"Godonlyknowswhytheylockedmeineverynight。
Toseesomeoftheirfacesyou’dhavethoughttheywereafraidI’dgoaboutatnightstranglingpeople。
AmIamurderingbrute?DoIlookit?ByJove!IfIhadbeenhewouldn’thavetrustedhimselflikethatintomyroom。
You’llsayImighthavechuckedhimasideandboltedout,thereandthen——itwasdarkalready。Well,no。AndforthesamereasonIwouldn’tthinkoftryingtosmashthedoor。
Therewouldhavebeenarushtostopmeatthenoise,andIdidnotmeantogetintoaconfoundedscrimmage。
Somebodyelsemighthavegotkilled——forIwouldnothavebrokenoutonlytogetchuckedback,andIdidnotwantanymoreofthatwork。Herefused,lookingmoresickthanever。
Hewasafraidofthemen,andalsoofthatoldsecondmateofhiswhohadbeensailingwithhimforyears——agray-headedoldhumbug;
andhissteward,too,hadbeenwithhimdevilknowshowlong——
seventeenyearsormore——adogmaticsortofloaferwhohatedmelikepoison,justbecauseIwasthechiefmate。NochiefmateevermademorethanonevoyageintheSephora,youknow。
Thosetwooldchapsrantheship。Devilonlyknowswhattheskipperwasn’tafraidof(allhisnervewenttopiecesaltogetherinthathellishspellofbadweatherwehad)——ofwhatthelawwoulddotohim——ofhiswife,perhaps。Oh,yes!she’sonboard。
ThoughIdon’tthinkshewouldhavemeddled。Shewouldhavebeenonlytoogladtohavemeoutoftheshipinanyway。
The`brandofCain’business,don’tyousee。That’sallright。
Iwasreadyenoughtogooffwanderingonthefaceoftheearth——
andthatwaspriceenoughtopayforanAbelofthatsort。
Anyhow,hewouldn’tlistentome。’Thisthingmusttakeitscourse。
Irepresentthelawhere。’Hewasshakinglikealeaf。
`Soyouwon’t?’`No!’’ThenIhopeyouwillbeabletosleeponthat,’
Isaid,andturnedmybackonhim。`Iwonderthatyoucan,’
crieshe,andlocksthedoor。
"Wellafterthat,Icouldn’t。Notverywell。
Thatwasthreeweeksago。WehavehadaslowpassagethroughtheJavaSea;driftedaboutCarimatafortendays。
Whenweanchoredheretheythought,Isuppose,itwasallright。
Thenearestland(andthat’sfivemiles)istheship’sdestination;
theconsulwouldsoonsetaboutcatchingme;andtherewouldhavebeennoobjectinboldingtotheseisletsthere。
Idon’tsupposethere’sadropofwateronthem。Idon’tknowhowitwas,buttonightthatsteward,afterbringingmemysupper,wentouttoletmeeatit,andleftthedoorunlocked。
AndIateit——alltherewas,too。AfterIhadfinishedIstrolledoutonthequarter-deck。Idon’tknowthatImeanttodoanything。
AbreathoffreshairwasallIwanted,Ibelieve。
Thenasuddentemptationcameoverme。IkickedoffmyslippersandwasinthewaterbeforeIhadmadeupmymindfairly。
Somebodyheardthesplashandtheyraisedanawfulhullabaloo。
`He’sgone!Lowertheboats!He’scommittedsuicide!
No,he’sswimming。’CertainlyIwasswimming。It’snotsoeasyforaswimmerlikemetocommitsuicidebydrowning。
Ilandedonthenearestisletbeforetheboatlefttheship’sside。
Iheardthempullingaboutinthedark,hailing,andsoon,butafterabittheygaveup。Everythingquieteddownandtheanchoragebecamestillasdeath。Isatdownonastoneandbegantothink。
Ifeltcertaintheywouldstartsearchingformeatdaylight。
Therewasnoplacetohideonthosestonythings——
andiftherehadbeen,whatwouldhavebeenthegood?
ButnowIwasclearofthatship,Iwasnotgoingback。
SoafterawhileItookoffallmyclothes,tiedthemupinabundlewithastoneinside,anddroppedtheminthedeepwaterontheoutersideofthatislet。Thatwassuicideenoughforme。
Letthemthinkwhattheyliked,butIdidn’tmeantodrownmyself。
ImeanttoswimtillIsank——butthat’snotthesamething。
Istruckoutforanotheroftheselittleislands,anditwasfromthatonethatIfirstsawyourridinglight。
Somethingtoswimfor。Iwentoneasily,andonthewayIcameuponaflatrockafootortwoabovewater。Inthedaytime,Idaresay,youmightmakeitoutwithaglassfromyourpoop。
Iscrambleduponitandrestedmyselfforabit。
ThenImadeanotherstart。Thatlastspellmusthavebeenoveramile。"
Hiswhisperwasgettingfainterandfainter,andallthetimehestaredstraightoutthroughtheporthole,inwhichtherewasnotevenastartobeseen。Ihadnotinterruptedhim。
Therewassomethingthatmadecommentimpossibleinhisnarrative,orperhapsinhimself;asortoffeeling,aquality,whichIcan’tfindanamefor。Andwhenheceased,allIfoundwasafutilewhisper:
"Soyouswamforourlight?"
"Yes——straightforit。Itwassomethingtoswimfor。
Icouldn’tseeanystarslowdownbecausethecoastwasintheway,andIcouldn’tseetheland,either。Thewaterwaslikeglass。
Onemighthavebeenswimminginaconfoundedthousand-feetdeepcisternwithnoplaceforscramblingoutanywhere;butwhatIdidn’tlikewasthenotionofswimmingroundandroundlikeacrazedbullockbeforeIgaveout;andasIdidn’tmeantogoback……No。Doyouseemebeinghauledback,starknaked,offoneoftheselittleislandsbythescruffoftheneckandfightinglikeawildbeast?Somebodywouldhavegotkilledforcertain,andIdidnotwantanyofthat。SoIwenton。
Thenyourladder——"
"Whydidn’tyouhailtheship?"Iasked,alittlelouder。
Hetouchedmyshoulderlightly。Lazyfootstepscamerightoverourheadsandstopped。Thesecondmatehadcrossedfromtheothersideofthepoopandmighthavebeenhangingovertherailforallweknew。
"Hecouldn’thearustalking——couldhe?"Mydoublebreathedintomyveryear,anxiously。
Hisanxietywasinanswer,asufficientanswer,tothequestionIhadputtohim。Ananswercontainingallthedifficultyofthatsituation。Iclosedtheportholequietly,tomakesure。
Alouderwordmighthavebeenoverheard。
"Who’sthat?"hewhisperedthen。
"Mysecondmate。ButIdon’tknowmuchmoreofthefellowthanyoudo。"
AndItoldhimalittleaboutmyself。IhadbeenappointedtotakechargewhileIleastexpectedanythingofthesort,notquiteafortnightago。Ididn’tknoweithertheshiporthepeople。
Hadn’thadthetimeinporttolookaboutmeorsizeanybodyup。
Andastothecrew,alltheyknewwasthatIwasappointedtotaketheshiphome。Fortherest,Iwasalmostasmuchofastrangeronboardashimself,Isaid。AndatthemomentIfeltitmostacutely。
Ifeltthatitwouldtakeverylittletomakemeasuspectpersonintheeyesoftheship’scompany。
Hehadturnedaboutmeantime;andwe,thetwostrangersintheship,facedeachotherinidenticalattitudes。
"Yourladder——"hemurmured,afterasilence。"Who’dhavethoughtoffindingaladderhangingoveratnightinashipanchoredouthere!
Ifeltjustthenaveryunpleasantfaintness。AfterthelifeI’vebeenleadingfornineweeks,anybodywouldhavegotoutofcondition。
Iwasn’tcapableofswimmingroundasfarasyourrudderchains。
And,loandbehold!therewasaladdertogetholdof。
AfterIgrippeditIsaidtomyself,`What’sthegood?’
WhenIsawaman’sheadlookingoverIthoughtIwouldswimawaypresentlyandleavehimshouting——inwhateverlanguageitwas。
Ididn’tmindbeinglookedat。I——Ilikedit。Andthenyouspeakingtomesoquietly——asifyouhadexpectedme——mademeholdonalittlelonger。
Ithadbeenaconfoundedlonelytime——Idon’tmeanwhileswimming。
Iwasgladtotalkalittletosomebodythatdidn’tbelongtotheSephora。
Astoaskingforthecaptain,thatwasamereimpulse。Itcouldhavebeennouse,withalltheshipknowingaboutmeandtheotherpeopleprettycertaintoberoundhereinthemorning。Idon’tknow——
Iwantedtobeseen,totalkwithsomebody,beforeIwenton。
Idon’tknowwhatIwouldhavesaid……`Finenight,isn’tit?’
orsomethingofthesort。"
"Doyouthinktheywillberoundherepresently?"
Iaskedwithsomeincredulity。
"Quitelikely,"hesaid,faintly。
"Helookedextremelyhaggardallofasudden。Hisheadrolledonhisshoulders。
"H’m。Weshallseethen。Meantimegetintothatbed,"Iwhispered。
"Wanthelp?There。"
Itwasaratherhighbedplacewithasetofdrawersunderneath。
ThisamazingswimmerreallyneededtheliftIgavehimbyseizinghisleg。
Hetumbledin,rolledoveronhisback,andflungonearmacrosshiseyes。
Andthen,withhisfacenearlyhidden,hemusthavelookedexactlyasIusedtolookinthatbed。Igazeduponmyotherselfforawhilebeforedrawingacrosscarefullythetwogreensergecurtainswhichranonabrassrod。
Ithoughtforamomentofpinningthemtogetherforgreatersafety,butIsatdownonthecouch,andoncethereIfeltunwillingtoriseandhuntforapin。Iwoulddoitinamoment。Iwasextremelytired,inapeculiarlyintimateway,bythestrainofstealthiness,bytheeffortofwhisperingandthegeneralsecrecyofthisexcitement。
Itwasthreeo’clockbynowandIhadbeenonmyfeetsincenine,butIwasnotsleepy;Icouldnothavegonetosleep。Isatthere,faggedout,lookingatthecurtains,tryingtoclearmymindoftheconfusedsensationofbeingintwoplacesatonce,andgreatlybotheredbyanexasperatingknockinginmyhead。Itwasarelieftodiscoversuddenlythatitwasnotinmyheadatall,butontheoutsideofthedoor。
BeforeIcouldcollectmyselfthewords"Comein"wereoutofmymouth,andthestewardenteredwithatray,bringinginmymorningcoffee。
Ihadslept,afterall,andIwassofrightenedthatIshouted,"Thisway!Iamhere,steward,"asthoughhehadbeenmilesaway。
Heputdownthetrayonthetablenextthecouchandonlythensaid,veryquietly,"Icanseeyouarehere,sir。"Ifelthimgivemeakeenlook,butIdarednotmeethiseyesjustthen。HemusthavewonderedwhyI
haddrawnthecurtainsofmybedbeforegoingtosleeponthecouch。
Hewentout,hookingthedooropenasusual。
Iheardthecrewwashingdecksaboveme。IknewIwouldhavebeentoldatonceiftherehadbeenanywind。Calm,Ithought,andIwasdoublyvexed。Indeed,Ifeltdualmorethanever。
Thestewardreappearedsuddenlyinthedoorway。
Ijumpedupfromthecouchsoquicklythathegaveastart。
"Whatdoyouwanthere?"
"Closeyourport,sir——theyarewashingdecks。"
"Itisclosed,"Isaid,reddening。
"Verywell,sir。"Buthedidnotmovefromthedoorwayandreturnedmystareinanextraordinary,equivocalmannerforatime。
Thenhiseyeswavered,allhisexpressionchanged,andinavoiceunusuallygentle,almostcoaxingly:
"MayIcomeintotaketheemptycupaway,sir?"
"Ofcourse!"Iturnedmybackonhimwhilehepoppedinandout。
ThenIunhookedandclosedthedoorandevenpushedthebolt。
Thissortofthingcouldnotgoonverylong。Thecabinwasashotasanoven,too。Itookapeepatmydouble,anddiscoveredthathehadnotmoved,hisarmwasstilloverhiseyes;buthischestheaved;hishairwaswet;hischinglistenedwithperspiration。
Ireachedoverhimandopenedtheport。
"Imustshowmyselfondeck,"Ireflected。
Ofcourse,theoretically,IcoulddowhatIliked,withnoonetosaynaytomewithinthewholecircleofthehorizon;
buttolockmycabindoorandtakethekeyawayIdidnotdare。
DirectlyIputmyheadoutofthecompanionIsawthegroupofmytwoofficers,thesecondmatebarefooted,thechiefmateinlongIndia-rubberboots,nearthebreakofthepoop,andthestewardhalfwaydownthepoopladdertalkingtothemeagerly。
Hehappenedtocatchsightofmeanddived,thesecondrandownonthemain-deckshoutingsomeorderorother,andthechiefmatecametomeetme,touchinghiscap。
TherewasasortofcuriosityinhiseyethatIdidnotlike。
Idon’tknowwhetherthestewardhadtoldthemthatIwas"queer"only,ordownrightdrunk,butIknowthemanmeanttohaveagoodlookatme。
Iwatchedhimcomingwithasmilewhich,ashegotintopoint-blankrange,tookeffectandfrozehisverywhiskers。Ididnotgivehimtimetoopenhislips。
"Squaretheyardsbyliftsandbracesbeforethehandsgotobreakfast。"
ItwasthefirstparticularorderIhadgivenonboardthatship;
andIstayedondecktoseeitexecuted,too。Ihadfelttheneedofassertingmyselfwithoutlossoftime。Thatsneeringyoungcubgottakendownapegortwoonthatoccasion,andIalsoseizedtheopportunityofhavingagoodlookatthefaceofeveryforemastmanastheyfiledpastmetogototheafterbraces。
Atbreakfasttime,eatingnothingmyself,Ipresidedwithsuchfrigiddignitythatthetwomateswereonlytoogladtoescapefromthecabinassoonasdecencypermitted;andallthetimethedualworkingofmyminddistractedmealmosttothepointofinsanity。
Iwasconstantlywatchingmyself,mysecretself,asdependentonmyactionsasmyownpersonality,sleepinginthatbed,behindthatdoorwhichfacedmeasIsatattheheadofthetable。
Itwasverymuchlikebeingmad,onlyitwasworsebecauseonewasawareofit。
Ihadtoshakehimforasolidminute,butwhenatlastheopenedhiseyesitwasinthefullpossessionofhissenses,withaninquiringlook。
"All’swellsofar,"Iwhispered。"Nowyoumustvanishintothebathroom。"
Hedidso,asnoiselessasaghost,andthenIrangforthesteward,andfacinghimboldly,directedhimtotidyupmystateroomwhileIwashavingmybath——"andbequickaboutit。"Asmytoneadmittedofnoexcuses,hesaid,"Yes,sir,"andranofftofetchhisdustpanandbrushes。
Itookabathanddidmostofmydressing,splashing,andwhistlingsoftlyforthesteward’sedification,whilethesecretsharerofmylifestooddrawnupboltuprightinthatlittlespace,hisfacelookingverysunkenindaylight,hiseyelidsloweredunderthestern,darklineofhiseyebrowsdrawntogetherbyaslightfrown。
WhenIlefthimtheretogobacktomyroomthestewardwasfinishingdusting。Isentforthemateandengagedhiminsomeinsignificantconversation。Itwas,asitwere,triflingwiththeterrificcharacterofhiswhiskers;butmyobjectwastogivehimanopportunityforagoodlookatmycabin。
AndthenIcouldatlastshut,withaclearconscience,thedoorofmystateroomandgetmydoublebackintotherecessedpart。
Therewasnothingelseforit。Hehadtositstillonasmallfoldingstool,halfsmotheredbytheheavycoatshangingthere。
Welistenedtothestewardgoingintothebathroomoutofthesaloon,fillingthewaterbottlesthere,scrubbingthebath,settingthingstorights,whisk,bang,clatter——outagainintothesaloon——turnthekey——click。Suchwasmyschemeforkeepingmysecondselfinvisible。Nothingbettercouldbecontrivedunderthecircumstances。Andtherewesat;
Iatmywritingdeskreadytoappearbusywithsomepapers,hebehindmeoutofsightofthedoor。Itwouldnothavebeenprudenttotalkindaytime;andIcouldnothavestoodtheexcitementofthatqueersenseofwhisperingtomyself。
Nowandthen,glancingovermyshoulder,Isawhimfarbackthere,sittingrigidlyonthelowstool,hisbarefeetclosetogether,hisarmsfolded,hisheadhangingonhisbreast——andperfectlystill。
Anybodywouldhavetakenhimforme。
Iwasfascinatedbyitmyself。EverymomentIhadtoglanceovermyshoulder。Iwaslookingathimwhenavoiceoutsidethedoorsaid:
"Begpardon,sir。"
"Well!……Ikeptmyeyesonhim,andsowhenthevoiceoutsidethedoorannounced,"There’saship’sboatcomingourway,sir,"
Isawhimgiveastart——thefirstmovementhehadmadeforhours。
Buthedidnotraisehisbowedhead。
"Allright。Gettheladderover。"
Ihesitated。ShouldIwhispersomethingtohim?Butwhat?
Hisimmobilityseemedtohavebeenneverdisturbed。
WhatcouldItellhimhedidnotknowalready?……FinallyIwentondeck。
II
TheskipperoftheSephorahadathinredwhiskerallroundhisface,andthesortofcomplexionthatgoeswithhairofthatcolor;
alsotheparticular,rathersmearyshadeofblueintheeyes。
Hewasnotexactlyashowyfigure;hisshoulderswerehigh,hisstaturebutmiddling——onelegslightlymorebandythantheother。Heshookhands,lookingvaguelyaround。
Aspiritlesstenacitywashismaincharacteristic,Ijudged。
Ibehavedwithapolitenesswhichseemedtodisconcerthim。
Perhapshewasshy。Hemumbledtomeasifhewereashamedofwhathewassaying;gavehisname(itwassomethinglikeArchbold——
butatthisdistanceofyearsIhardlyamsure),hisship’sname,andafewotherparticularsofthatsort,inthemannerofacriminalmakingareluctantanddolefulconfession。
Hehadhadterribleweatheronthepassageout——terrible——terrible——
wifeaboard,too。
Bythistimewewereseatedinthecabinandthestewardbroughtinatraywithabottleandglasses。"Thanks!No。"Nevertookliquor。
Wouldhavesomewater,though。Hedranktwotumblerfuls。
Terriblethirstywork。Eversincedaylighthadbeenexploringtheislandsroundhisship。
"Whatwasthatfor——fun?"Iasked,withanappearanceofpoliteinterest。
"No!"Hesighed。"Painfulduty。"
AshepersistedinhismumblingandIwantedmydoubletoheareveryword,IhituponthenotionofinforminghimthatIregrettedtosayIwashardofhearing。
"Suchayoungman,too!"henodded,keepinghissmearyblue,unintelligenteyesfasteneduponme。"Whatwasthecauseofit——
somedisease?"heinquired,withouttheleastsympathyandasifhethoughtthat,ifso,I’dgotnomorethanIdeserved。
"Yes;disease,"Iadmittedinacheerfultonewhichseemedtoshockhim。
Butmypointwasgained,becausehehadtoraisehisvoicetogivemehistale。Itisnotworthwhiletorecordhisversion。
Itwasjustovertwomonthssinceallthishadhappened,andhehadthoughtsomuchaboutitthatheseemedcompletelymuddledastoitsbearings,butstillimmenselyimpressed。
"Whatwouldyouthinkofsuchathinghappeningonboardyourownship?
I’vehadtheSephoraforthesefifteenyears。Iamawell-knownshipmaster。"
Hewasdenselydistressed——andperhapsIshouldhavesympathizedwithhimifIhadbeenabletodetachmymentalvisionfromtheunsuspectedsharerofmycabinasthoughheweremysecondself。Therehewasontheothersideofthebulkhead,fourorfivefeetfromus,nomore,aswesatinthesaloon。
IlookedpolitelyatCaptainArchbold(ifthatwashisname),butitwastheotherIsaw,inagraysleepingsuit,seatedonalowstool,hisbarefeetclosetogether,hisarmsfolded,andeverywordsaidbetweenusfallingintotheearsofhisdarkheadbowedonhischest。
"Ihavebeenatseanow,manandboy,forseven-and-thirtyyears,andI’veneverheardofsuchathinghappeninginanEnglishship。
Andthatitshouldbemyship。Wifeonboard,too。"
Iwashardlylisteningtohim。
"Don’tyouthink,"Isaid,"thattheheavyseawhich,youtoldme,cameaboardjustthenmighthavekilledtheman?
Ihaveseenthesheerweightofaseakillamanveryneatly,bysimplybreakinghisneck。"
"GoodGod!"heuttered,impressively,fixinghissmearyblueeyesonme。
"Thesea!Nomankilledbytheseaeverlookedlikethat。"
Heseemedpositivelyscandalizedatmysuggestion。AndasIgazedathimcertainlynotpreparedforanythingoriginalonhispart,headvancedhisheadclosetomineandthrusthistongueoutatmesosuddenlythatIcouldn’thelpstartingback。