out，Idrovestraighttothepublic—house，whereIbaitedmyhorses，andwhereIfoundsomeofthechaisesanddriverswhohaddriventhefolkstothelunatic—lookingmansion，andwerenowwaitingtotakethemupagain。Whilstmyhorseswereeatingtheirbait，Isatmedown，astheweatherwaswarm，atatableoutside，andsmokedapipe，anddranksomeale，incompanywiththecoachmanoftheoldgentlemanwhohadgonetothehousewithhisson，andthecoachmanthentoldmethatthehousewasaPapisthouse，andthatthepresentwasagrandmeetingofallthefoolsandrascalsinthecountry，whocametobowdowntoimages，andtoconcertschemes—
　　prettyschemesnodoubt—foroverturningthereligionofthecountry，andthatforhisparthedidnotapproveofbeingconcernedwithsuchdoings，andthathewasgoingtogivehismasterwarningnextday。So，asweweredrinkinganddiscoursing，updrovethechariotoftheScotchman，anddowngothisvaletandthedriver，andwhilstthedriverwasseeingafterthehorses，thevaletcameandsatdownatthetablewherethegentleman’scoachmanandIweredrinking。I
　　knewthefellowwell，aScotchmanlikehismaster，andjustofthesamekidney，withwhitekidgloves，redhairfrizzled，apatchofpaintonhisface，andhishandscoveredwithrings。Thisveryfellow，Imusttellyou，wasoneofthosemostbusyinendeavouringtogetmeturnedoutoftheservants’clubinParkLane，becauseIhappenedtoservealiteraryman；sohesatdown，andinakindofaffectedtonecriedout，’Landlord，bringmeaglassofcoldnegus。’Thelandlord，however，toldhimthattherewasnonegus，butthatifhepleased，hecouldhaveajugofasgoodbeerasanyinthecountry。’Confoundthebeer，’saidthevalet，’doyouthinkthatIamaccustomedtosuchvulgarbeverage？’
　　However，ashefoundtherewasnothingbettertobehad，heletthemanbringhimsomebeer，andwhenhehadgotit，soonshowedthathecoulddrinkiteasilyenough；so，whenhehaddrunktwoorthreedraughts，heturnedhiseyesinacontemptuousmanner，first，onthecoachman，andthenonme：
　　Isawthescamprecollectedme，forafterstaringatmeandmydressforabouthalfaminute，heputonabroadgrin，andflinginghisheadback，heutteredaloudlaugh。Well，Ididnotlikethis，asyoumaywellbelieve，andtakingthepipeoutofmymouth，Iaskedhimifhemeantanythingpersonal，towhichheanswered，thathehadsaidnothingtome，andthathehadarighttolookwherehepleased，andlaughwhenhepleased。Well，astoacertainextenthewasright，astolookingandlaughing；andasIhaveoccasionallylookedatafoolandlaughed，thoughIwasnotthefoolinthisinstance，Iputmypipeintomymouthandsaidnomore。Thisquietandwell—regulatedbehaviourofmine，however，thefellowinterpretedintofear；so，afterdrinkingalittlemore，hesuddenlystartedup，andstridingonceortwicebeforethetable，heaskedmewhatImeantbythatimpertinentquestionofmine，sayingthathehadagoodmindtowringmynoseformypresumption。’Youhave？’saidI，gettingup，andlayingdownmypipe。’Well，I’llnowgiveyouanopportunity。’SoIputmyselfinanattitude，andwentuptohim，saying’I
　　haveanoldscoretosettlewithyou，youscamp；youwantedtogetmeturnedoutoftheclub，didn’tyou？’Andthereupon，rememberingthathehadthreatenedtowringmynose，Igavehimasnorteruponhisown。Iwishyoucouldhaveseenthefellowwhenhefeltthesmart；sofarfromtryingtodefendhimself，heturnedround，andwithhishandtohisface，attemptedtorunaway；butIwasnowinaregularpassion，andfollowinghimup，gotbeforehim，andwasgoingtopummelawayathim，whenheburstintotears，andbeggedmenottohurthim，sayingthathewassorryifhehadoffendedme，andthat，ifIpleased，hewouldgodownonhisknees，ordoanythingelseIwanted。Well，whenIheardhimtalkinthismanner，I，ofcourse，lethimbe；Icouldhardlyhelplaughingatthefigurehecut；hisfaceallblubberedwithtears，andbloodandpaint；butIdidnotlaughatthepoorcreatureeither，butwenttothetableandtookupmypipe，andsmokedanddrankasifnothinghadhappened；andthefellow，afterhavingbeentothepump，cameandsatdown，crying，andtryingtocurryfavourwithmeandthecoachman；presently，however，puttingonaconfidentiallook，hebegantotalkofthePopishhouse，andofthedoingsthere，andsaidhesupposedashowwewereoftheparty，andthatitwasallright；andthenhebegantotalkofthePopeofRome，andwhatanicemanhewas，andwhatafinethingitwastobeofhisreligion，especiallyiffolkswentovertohim；andhowitadvancedthemintheworld，andgavethemconsideration；andhowhismaster，whohadbeenabroadandseenthePope，andkissedhistoe，wasgoingovertothePopishreligion，andhadpersuadedhimtoconsenttodoso，andtoforsakehisown，whichIthinkthescoundrelcalledthe’PiscopalChurchofScotland，andhowmanyothersofthatchurchweregoingover，thinkingtobettertheirconditioninlifebysodoing，andtobemorethoughton；andhowmanyoftheEnglishChurchwerethinkingofgoingovertoo—andthathehadnodoubtthatitwouldallendrightandcomfortably。
　　Well，ashewasgoingoninthisway，theoldcoachmanbegantospit，andgettingup，flungallthebeerthatwasinhisjugupontheground，andgoingaway，orderedanotherjugofbeer，andsatdownatanothertable，sayingthathewouldnotdrinkinsuchcompany；andItoogotup，andflungwhatbeerremainedinmyjug，therewasn’tmorethanadrop，inthefellow’sface，saying，Iwouldscorntodrinkanymoreinsuchcompany；andthenIwenttomyhorses，putthemto，paidmyreckoning，anddrovehome。"
　　Thepostillionhavingrelatedhisstory，towhichIlistenedwithalldueattention，musedforamoment，andthensaid，"I
　　daresayyourememberhow，sometimesince，whenoldBillhadbeentellingushowtheGovernmentalongtimeago，haddoneawaywithrobbingonthehighway，byputtingdownthepublic—
　　housesandplaceswhichthehighwaymenfrequented，andbysendingagoodmountedpolicetohuntthemdown，IsaidthatitwasashamethatthepresentGovernmentdidnotemploysomewhatthesamemeansinordertostoptheproceedingsofMumboJumboandhisgangnow—a—daysinEngland。Howsomever，sinceIhavedrivenafaretoaPopishrendezvous，andseensomethingofwhatisgoingonthere，IshouldconceivethattheGovernmentarejustifiedinallowingthegangthefreeexerciseoftheircalling。Anybodyiswelcometostoopandpickupnothing，orworsethannothing，andifMumboJumbo’speople，aftertheirexpeditions，returntotheirhauntswithnobetterplunderintheshapeofconvertsthanwhatIsawgoingintoyonderplaceofcall，Ishouldsaytheyarewelcometowhattheyget；forifthat’sthekindofrubbishtheystealoutoftheChurchofEngland，oranyotherchurch，whoinhissensesbutwouldsayagoodriddance，andmanythanksforyourtrouble：atanyrate，thatismyopinionofthematter。"
　　CHAPTERXXIX
　　DeliberationswithSelf—Resolution—InvitationtoDinner—
　　TheCommercialTraveller—TheLandlord’sOffer—TheCometWine。
　　ITwasnowthatIhadfrequentdeliberationswithmyself。
　　ShouldIcontinueattheinninmypresentposition？Iwasnotverymuchcaptivatedwithit；therewaslittlepoetryinkeepinganaccountofthecorn，hay，andstrawwhichcamein，andwasgivenout，andIwasfondofpoetry；moreover，therewasnogloryatalltobeexpectedindoingso，andIwasfondofglory。ShouldIgiveupthatsituation，andremainingattheinn，becomeostlerunderoldBill？Therewasmorepoetryinrubbingdownhorsesthaninkeepinganaccountofstraw，hay，andcorn；therewasalsosomeprospectofgloryattachedtothesituationofostler，forthegroomsandstable—boysoccasionallytalkedofanostler，agreatwaydowntheroad，whohadbeenpresentedbysomesportingpeople，notwithasilvervase，asourgovernorhadbeen，butwithasilvercurrycomb，intestimonyoftheiradmirationforhisskill；butIconfessthatthepoetryofrubbingdownhadbecome，asallotherpoetrybecomes，ratherprosybyfrequentrepetition，andwithrespecttothechanceofderivinggloryfromtheemployment，Ientertained，intheeventofmydeterminingtostay，veryslighthopeofeverattainingskillintheostlerartsufficienttoinducesportingpeopletobestowuponmeasilvercurrycomb。IwasnothalfsogoodanostlerasoldBill，whohadneverbeenpresentedwithasilvercurrycomb，andIneverexpectedtobecomeso，thereforewhatchancehadI？Itwastrue，therewasaprospectofsomepecuniaryemolumenttobederivedbyremainingineithersituation。Itwasveryprobablethat，providedIcontinuedtokeepanaccountofthehayandcorncominginandexpended，thelandlordwouldconsenttoallowmeapoundaweek，whichattheendofadozenyears，providedIkeptmyselfsober，wouldamounttoaconsiderablesum。Imight，ontheretirementofoldBill，bytakinghisplace，saveupadecentsumofmoney，provided，unlikehim，I
　　keptmyselfsober，andlaidbyalltheshillingsandsixpencesIgot；buttheprospectoflayingupadecentsumofmoneywasnotofsufficientimportancetoinducemetocontinueeitheratmywoodendesk，orintheinn—yard。ThereaderwillrememberwhatdifficultyIhadtomakeupmymindtobecomeamerchantundertheArmenian’sauspices，evenwiththeprospectofmakingtwoorthreehundredthousandpoundsbyfollowingtheArmenianwayofdoingbusiness，soitwasnotprobablethatIshouldfeeldisposedtobeabook—keeperorostlerallmylifewithnootherprospectthanbeingabletomakeatidysumofmoney。Ifindeed，besidestheprospectofmakingatidysumattheendofperhapsfortyyears’
　　ostlering，Ihadbeencertainofbeingpresentedwithasilvercurrycombwithmynameengraveduponit，whichImighthavelefttomydescendants，or，indefaultthereof，totheparishchurchdestinedtocontainmybones，withdirectionsthatitmightbesolderedintothewallabovethearchleadingfromthebodyofthechurchintothechancel—Iwillnotsaywithsuchacertaintyofimmortality，combinedwithsuchaprospectofmoderatepecuniaryadvantage，—Imightnothavethoughtitworthmywhiletostay，butIentertainednosuchcertainty，and，takingeverythingintoconsideration，Ideterminedtomountmyhorseandleavetheinn。
　　Thishorsehadcausedmeforsometimepastnolittleperplexity；Ihadfrequentlyrepentedofhavingpurchasedhim，moreespeciallyasthepurchasehadbeenmadewithanotherperson’smoney，andhadmorethanonceshownhimtopeoplewho，Iimagined，werelikelytopurchasehim；but，thoughtheywereprofuseinhispraise，aspeoplegenerallyareinthepraiseofwhattheydon’tintendtopurchase，theynevermademeanoffer，andnowthatIhaddeterminedtomountonhisbackandrideaway，whatwasItodowithhiminthesequel？Icouldnotmaintainhimlong。SuddenlyI
　　bethoughtmeofHorncastle，whichFrancisArdryhadmentionedasaplacewherethehorsewaslikelytofindapurchaser，andnothavingdetermineduponanyparticularplacetowhichtorepair，IthoughtthatIcoulddonobetterthanbetakemyselftoHorncastleinthefirstinstance，andthereendeavourtodisposeofmyhorse。
　　OnmakinginquirieswithrespecttothesituationofHorncastle，andthetimewhenthefairwouldbeheld，I
　　learnedthatthetownwassituatedinLincolnshire，aboutahundredandfiftymilesfromtheinnatwhichIwasatpresentsojourning，andthatthefairwouldbeheldnominallywithinaboutamonth，butthatitwasalwaysrequisitetobeonthespotsomedaysbeforethenominaldayofthefair，asallthebesthorsesweregenerallysoldbeforethattime，andthepeoplewhocametopurchasegoneawaywithwhattheyhadbought。
　　Thepeopleoftheinnwereverysorryonbeinginformedofmydeterminationtodepart。OldBilltoldmethathehadhopedashowIhadintendedtosettledownthere，andtotakehisplaceasostlerwhenhewasfitfornomorework，adding，thatthoughIdidnotknowmuchofthebusiness，yethehadnodoubtbutthatImightimprove。Myfriendthepostillionwasparticularlysorry，andtakingmewithhimtothetap—
　　roomcalledfortwopintsofbeer，tooneofwhichhetreatedme；andwhilstweweredrinkingtoldmehowparticularlysorryhewasatthethoughtofmygoing，butthathehopedI
　　shouldthinkbetterofthematter。OnmytellinghimthatI
　　mustgo，hesaidthathetrustedIshouldputoffmydepartureforthreeweeks，inorderthatImightbepresentathismarriage，thebannsofwhichwerejustabouttobepublished。Hesaidthatnothingwouldgivehimgreaterpleasurethantoseemedanceaminuetwithhiswifeafterthemarriagedinner；butItoldhimitwasimpossiblethatI
　　shouldstay，myaffairsimperativelycallingmeelsewhere；
　　andthatwithrespecttomydancingaminuet，suchathingwasoutofthequestion，asIhadneverlearnedtodance。Atwhichhesaidthathewasexceedinglysorry，andfindingmedeterminedtogo，wishedmesuccessinallmyundertakings。
　　Themasterofthehouse，towhom，asindutybound，I
　　communicatedmyintentionbeforeIspokeofittotheservants，was，Imakenodoubt，verysorry，thoughhedidnotexactlytellmeso。Whathesaidwas，thathehadneverexpectedthatIshouldremainlongthere，assuchasituationneverappearedtohimquitesuitabletome，thoughIhadbeenverydiligent，andhadgivenhimperfectsatisfaction。OnhisinquiringwhenIintendedtodepart，Iinformedhimnextday，whereuponhebeggedthatIwoulddefermydeparturetillthenextdaybutone，anddohimthefavourofdiningwithhimonthemorrow。IinformedhimthatIshouldbeonlytoohappy。
　　Onthefollowingdayatfouro’clockIdinedwiththelandlord，incompanywithacommercialtraveller。Thedinnerwasgood，thoughplain，consistingofboiledmackerel—
　　ratherararityinthosepartsatthattime—withfennelsauce，aprimebaronofroastbeefafterthemackerel，thenatartandnobleCheshirecheese；wehadprimesherryatdinner，andwhilsteatingthecheeseprimeporter，thatofBarclay，theonlygoodporterintheworld。Aftertheclothwasremovedwehadabottleofverygoodport；andwhilstpartakingoftheportIhadanargumentwiththecommercialtravelleronthesubjectofthecorn—laws。
　　Thecommercialtraveller，havingworstedmeintheargumentonthesubjectofthecorn—laws，gotupingreatglee，sayingthathemustorderhisgig，asbusinessmustbeattendedto。
　　Beforeleavingtheroom，however，heshookmepatronizinglybythehand，andsaidsomethingtothemasterofthehouse，butinsolowatonethatitescapedmyear。
　　NosoonerhadhedepartedthanthemasterofthehousetoldmethathisfriendthetravellerhadjustsaidthatIwasaconfoundedsensibleyoungfellow，andnotatallopinionated，asentimentinwhichhehimselfperfectlyagreed—thenhemmingonceortwice，hesaidthatasIwasgoingonajourneyhehopedIwastolerablywellprovidedwithmoney，addingthattravellingwasratherexpensive，especiallyonhorseback，themannerinwhichhesupposed，asIhadahorseinthestable，Iintendedtotravel。ItoldhimthatthoughIwasnotparticularlywellsuppliedwithmoney，Ihadsufficientfortheexpensesofmyjourney，attheendofwhichIhopedtoprocuremore。Hethenhemmedagain，andsaidthatsinceIhadbeenattheinnIhadrenderedhimagreatdealofserviceinmorewaysthanone，andthatheshouldnotthinkofpermittingmetodepartwithoutmakingmesomeremuneration；thenputtinghishandintohiswaistcoatpocket，hehandedmeachequefortenpounds，whichhehadpreparedbeforehand，thevalueofwhichhesaidIcouldreceiveatthenexttown，orthat，ifIwishedit，anywaiterinthehousewouldcashitforme。IthankedhimforhisgenerosityinthebesttermsIcouldselect，but，handinghimbackthecheque，ItoldhimthatIcouldnotacceptit，saying，that，sofarfromhisbeingmydebtor，Ibelievedmyselftobeindebtedtohim，asnotonlymyselfbutmyhorsehadbeenlivingathishouseforseveralweeks。Hereplied，thatasformyboardatahouselikehisitamountedtonothing，andasforthelittlecornandhaywhichthehorsehadconsumeditwasofnoconsequence，andthathemustinsistuponmytakingthecheque。ButIagaindeclined，tellinghimthatdoingsowouldbeaviolationofarulewhichIhaddeterminedtofollow，andwhichnothingbutthegreatestnecessitywouldevercompelmetobreakthrough—
　　nevertoincurobligations。"But，"saidhe，"receivingthismoneywillnotbeincurringanobligation，itisyourdue。"
　　"Idonotthinkso，"saidI；"Ididnotengagetoserveyouformoney，norwillItakeanyfromyou。""Perhapsyouwilltakeitasaloan？"saidhe。"No，"Ireplied，"Ineverborrow。""Well，"saidthelandlord，smiling，"youaredifferentfromallothersthatIamacquaintedwith。Ineveryetknewanyoneelsewhoscrupledtoborrowandreceiveobligations；why，therearetwobaronetsintheneighbourhoodwhohaveborrowedmoneyofme，ay，andwhohaveneverrepaidwhattheyborrowed；andthereareadozensquireswhoareunderconsiderableobligationstome，whoIdaresaywillneverreturnthem。Come，youneednotbemorescrupulousthanyoursuperiors—Imeaninstation。""Everyvesselmuststandonitsownbottom，"saidI；"theytakepleasureinreceivingobligations，Itakepleasureinbeingindependent。
　　Perhapstheyarewise，andIamafool，Iknownot，butonethingIamcertainof，whichis，thatwereInotindependentIshouldbeveryunhappy：Ishouldhavenovisionsthen。"
　　"Haveyouanyrelations？"saidthelandlord，lookingatmecompassionately；"excuseme，butIdon’tthinkyouareexactlyfittotakecareofyourself。""Thereyouaremistaken，"saidI，"Icantakepreciousgoodcareofmyself；
　　ay，andcandriveaprecioushardbargainwhenIhaveoccasion，butdrivingbargainsisawidelydifferentthingfromreceivinggifts。IamgoingtotakemyhorsetoHorncastle，andwhenthereIshallendeavourtoobtainhisfullvalue—aytothelastpenny。"
　　"Horncastle！"saidthelandlord，"Ihaveheardofthatplace；
　　youmustn’tbedreamingvisionswhenyougetthere，orthey’llstealthehorsefromunderyou。Well，"saidhe，rising，"Ishallnotpressyoufurtheronthesubjectofthecheque。Iintend，however，toputyouunderanobligationtome。"Hethenrangthebell，andhavingorderedtwofreshglassestobebrought，hewentoutandpresentlyreturnedwithasmallpintbottle，whichheuncorkedwithhisownhand；thensittingdown，hesaid，"ThewinethatIbringhere，isportofeighteenhundredandeleven，theyearofthecomet，thebestvintageonrecord；thewinewhichwehavebeendrinking，"headded，"isgood，butnottobecomparedwiththis，whichIneversell，andwhichIamcharyof。Whenyouhavedrunksomeofit，IthinkyouwillownthatIhaveconferredanobligationuponyou；"hethenfilledtheglasses，thewinewhichhepouredoutdiffusinganaromathroughtheroom；thenmotioningmetodrink，heraisedhisownglasstohislips，saying，"Come，friend，IdrinktoyoursuccessatHorncastle。"
　　CHAPTERXXX
　　TriumphalDeparture—NoSeasonlikeYouth—ExtremeOldAge—BeautifulEngland—TheRatcatcher—AMisadventure。
　　IDEPARTEDfromtheinnmuchinthesamefashionasIhadcometoit，mountedonasplendidhorseindifferentlywellcaparisoned，withthesmallvaliseattachedtomycrupper，inwhich，besidesthefewthingsIhadbroughtwithme，wasasmallbookofroadswithamapwhichhadbeenpresentedtomebythelandlord。ImustnotforgettostatethatIdidnotrideoutoftheyard，butthatmyhorsewasbroughttomeatthefrontdoorbyoldBill，whoinsistedupondoingso，andwhorefusedafive—shillingpiecewhichIofferedhim；anditwillbeaswelltoletthereaderknowthatthelandlordshookmebythehandasImounted，andthatthepeopleattachedtotheinn，maleandfemale—myfriendthepostillionatthehead—assembledbeforethehousetoseemeoff，andgavemethreecheersasIrodeaway。Perhapsnopersoneverdepartedfromaninnwithmoreeclatorbetterwishes；nobodylookedatmeaskance，excepttwostage—
　　coachmenwhowereloiteringabout，oneofwhomsaidtohiscompanion，"Isay，Jim！twighisportmanteau！aregularNewmarketturn—out，by—！"
　　Itwasinthecooloftheeveningofabrightday—allthedaysofthatsummerwerebright—thatIdeparted。Ifeltatfirstrathermelancholyatfindingmyselfagainlaunchedintothewideworld，andleavingthefriendswhomIhadlatelymadebehindme；butbyoccasionallytrottingthehorse，andoccasionallysingingasongofRomanvile，IhaddispelledthefeelingofmelancholybythetimeIhadproceededthreemilesdownthemainroad。Itwasattheendofthesethreemiles，justoppositeamilestone，thatIstruckintoacrossroad。
　　Afterridingaboutsevenmiles，threadingwhatarecalled，inpostillionparlance，cross—countryroads，Ireachedanotherhighroad，tendingtotheeast，alongwhichIproceededforamileortwo，whencomingtoasmallinn，aboutnineo’clock，Ihaltedandputupforthenight。
　　EarlyonthefollowingmorningIproceededonmyjourney，butfearingtogallthehorse，Inolongerrodehim，butledhimbythebridle，untilIcametoatownatthedistanceofabouttenmilesfromtheplacewhereIhadpassedthenight。
　　HereIstayedduringtheheatoftheday，moreonthehorse’saccountthanmyown，andtowardseveningresumedmyjourney，leadingtheanimalbythebridleasbefore；andinthismannerIproceededforseveraldays，travellingonanaveragefromtwentytotwenty—fivemilesaday，alwaysleadingtheanimal，exceptperhapsnowandthenofanevening，when，ifI
　　sawagoodpieceofroadbeforeme，Iwouldmountandputthehorseintoatrot，whichthecreatureseemedtoenjoyasmuchasmyself，showinghissatisfactionbysnortingandneighing，whilstIgaveutterancetomyownexhilarationbyshouts，orby"thechisheiskauloshesovesprelakiedumo，"orbysomethingelseofthesamekindinRomanvile。
　　Onthewhole，Ijourneyedalongverypleasantly，certainlyquiteaspleasantlyasIdoatpresent，nowthatIambecomeagentlemanandweighsixteenstone，thoughsomepeoplewouldsaythatmypresentmanneroftravellingismuchthemostpreferable，ridingasInowdo，insteadofleadingmyhorse；
　　receivingthehomageofostlersinsteadoftheirfamiliarnods；sittingdowntodinnerintheparlourofthebestinnI
　　canfind，insteadofpassingthebrightestpartofthedayinthekitchenofavillagealehouse；carryingonmyargumentafterdinneronthesubjectofthecorn—laws，withthebestcommercialgentlemenontheroad，insteadofbeingglad，whilstsippingapintofbeer，togetintoconversationwithblindtrampers，ormaimedAbrahamsailors，regalingthemselvesonhalf—pintsatthesaidvillagehostelries。
　　Manypeoplewilldoubtlesssaythatthingshavealteredwonderfullywithmeforthebetter，andtheywouldsayright，providedIpossessednowwhatIthencarriedaboutwithmeinmyjourneys—thespiritofyouth。Youthistheonlyseasonforenjoyment，andthefirsttwenty—fiveyearsofone’slifeareworthalltherestofthelongestlifeofman，eventhoughthosefive—and—twentybespentinpenuryandcontempt，andtherestinthepossessionofwealth，honours，respectability，ay，andmanyoftheminstrengthandhealth，suchaswillenableonetoridefortymilesbeforedinner，andoverone’spintofport—forthebestgentlemaninthelandshouldnotdrinkabottle—carryonone’sargument，withgravityanddecorum，withanycommercialgentlemanwho，responsivetoone’schallenge，takesthepartofhumanityandcommonsenseagainst"protection"andthelordoftheland。
　　Ah！thereisnothinglikeyouth—notthatafter—lifeisvalueless。Eveninextremeoldageonemaygetonverywell，providedwewillbutacceptofthebountiesofGod。Imettheotherdayanoldman，whoaskedmetodrink。"Iamnotthirsty，"saidI，"andwillnotdrinkwithyou。""Yes，youwill，"saidtheoldman，"forIamthisdayonehundredyearsold；andyouwillneveragainhaveanopportunityofdrinkingthehealthofamanonhishundredthbirthday。"SoIbrokemyword，anddrank。"Yoursisawonderfulage，"saidI。"Itisalongtimetolookbacktothebeginningofit，"saidtheoldman；"yet，uponthewhole，Iamnotsorrytohaveliveditall。""Howhaveyoupassedyourtime？"saidI。"AswellasIcould，"saidtheoldman；"alwaysenjoyingagoodthingwhenitcamehonestlywithinmyreach；notforgettingtopraiseGodforputtingitthere。""Isupposeyouwerefondofaglassofgoodalewhenyouwereyoung？""Yes，"saidtheoldman，"Iwas；andso，thankGod，Iamstill。"Andhedrankoffaglassofale。
　　OnIwentinmyjourney，traversingEnglandfromwesttoeast—ascendinganddescendinghills—crossingriversbybridgeandferry—andpassingoverextensiveplains。WhatabeautifulcountryisEngland！Peoplerunabroadtoseebeautifulcountries，andleavetheirownbehindunknown，unnoticed—theirownthemostbeautiful！Andthen，again，whatacountryforadventures！especiallytothosewhotravelonfoot，oronhorseback。Peoplerunabroadinquestofadventures，andtraverseSpainorPortugalonmuleoronhorseback；whereastherearetentimesmoreadventurestobemetwithinEnglandthaninSpain，Portugal，orstupidGermanytoboot。Witnessthenumberofadventuresnarratedinthepresentbook—abookentirelydevotedtoEngland。
　　Why，thereisnotachapterinthepresentbookwhichisnotfullofadventures，withtheexceptionofthepresentone，andthisisnotyetterminated。
　　Aftertraversingtwoorthreecounties，IreachedtheconfinesofLincolnshire。DuringoneparticularlyhotdayI
　　putupatapublic—house，towhich，intheevening，cameapartyofharvesterstomakemerry，who，findingmewanderingaboutthehouseastranger，invitedmetopartakeoftheirale；soIdrankwiththeharvesters，whosangmesongsaboutrurallife，suchas—