OCTOBER2O.
　　Wearrivedhereyesterday.Theambassadorisindisposed,andwillnotgooutforsomedays.Ifhewerelesspeevishandmorose,allwouldbewell.IseebuttooplainlythatHeavenhasdestinedmetoseveretrials;butcourage!alightheartmaybearanything.Alightheart!Ismiletofindsuchawordproceedingfrommypen.Alittlemorelightheartednesswouldrendermethehappiestbeingunderthesun.ButmustIdespairofmytalentsandfaculties,whilstothersoffarinferiorabilitiesparadebeforemewiththeutmostself-satisfaction?GraciousProvidence,towhomIoweallmypowers,whydidstthounotwithholdsomeofthoseblessingsIpossess,andsubstituteintheirplaceafeelingofself-confidenceandcontentment?
　　Butpatience!allwillyetbewell;forIassureyou,mydearfriend,youwereright:sinceIhavebeenobligedtoassociatecontinuallywithotherpeople,andobservewhattheydo,andhowtheyemploythemselves,Ihavebecomefarbettersatisfiedwithmyself.Forwearesoconstitutedbynature,thatweareeverpronetocompareourselveswithothers;andourhappinessormiserydependsverymuchontheobjectsandpersonsaroundus.Onthisaccount,nothingismoredangerousthansolitude:thereourimagination,alwaysdisposedtorise,takinganewflightonthewingsoffancy,picturestousachainofbeingsofwhomweseemthemostinferior.
　　Allthingsappeargreaterthantheyreallyare,andallseemsuperiortous.Thisoperationofthemindisquitenatural:wesocontinuallyfeelourownimperfections,andfancyweperceiveinothersthequalitieswedonotpossess,attributingtothemalsoallthatweenjoyourselves,thatbythisprocessweformtheideaofaperfect,happyman,——aman,however,whoonlyexistsinourownimagination.Butwhen,inspiteofweaknessanddisappointments,wesettoworkinearnest,andperseveresteadily,weoftenfind,that,thoughobligedcontinuallytotack,wemakemorewaythanotherswhohavetheassistanceofwindandtide;and,intruth,therecanbenogreatersatisfactionthantokeeppacewithothersoroutstripthemintherace.
　　NOVEMBER26.
　　Ibegintofindmysituationheremoretolerable,consideringallcircumstances.Ifindagreatadvantageinbeingmuchoccupied;andthenumberofpersonsImeet,andtheirdifferentpursuits,createavariedentertainmentforme.IhaveformedtheacquaintanceoftheCountC——andIesteemhimmoreandmoreeveryday.Heisamanofstrongunderstandingandgreatdiscernment;but,thoughheseesfartherthanotherpeople,heisnotonthataccountcoldinhismanner,butcapableofinspiringandreturningthewarmestaffection.Heappearedinterestedinmeononeoccasion,whenIhadtotransactsomebusinesswithhim.Heperceived,atthefirstword,thatweunderstoodeachother,andthathecouldconversewithmeinadifferenttonefromwhatheusedwithothers.Icannotsufficientlyesteemhisfrankandopenkindnesstome.Itisthegreatestandmostgenuineofpleasurestoobserveagreatmindinsympathywithourown.
　　DECEMBER24.
　　AsIanticipated,theambassadoroccasionsmeinfiniteannoyance.Heisthemostpunctiliousblockheadunderheaven.Hedoeseverythingstepbystep,withthetriflingminutenessofanoldwoman;andheisamanwhomitisimpossibletoplease,becauseheisneverpleasedwithhimself.Iliketodobusinessregularlyandcheerfully,and,whenitisfinished,toleaveit.Butheconstantlyreturnsmypaperstome,saying,"Theywilldo,"butrecommendingmetolookoverthemagain,as"onemayalwaysimprovebyusingabetterwordoramoreappropriateparticle."Ithenloseallpatience,andwishmyselfatthedevil's.Notaconjunction,notanadverb,mustbeomitted:hehasadeadlyantipathytoallthosetranspositionsofwhichIamsofond;and,ifthemusicofourperiodsisnottunedtotheestablished,officialkey,hecannotcomprehendourmeaning.Itisdeplorabletobeconnectedwithsuchafellow.
　　MyacquaintancewiththeCountC——istheonlycompensationforsuchanevil.Hetoldmefrankly,theotherday,thathewasmuchdispleasedwiththedifficultiesanddelaysoftheambassador;thatpeoplelikehimareobstacles,bothtothemselvesandtoothers."But,"addedhe,"onemustsubmit,likeatravellerwhohastoascendamountain:ifthemountainwasnotthere,theroadwouldbebothshorterandpleasanter;butthereitis,andhemustgetoverit."Theoldmanperceivesthecount'spartialityforme:thisannoyshim,and,heseizeseveryopportunitytodepreciatethecountinmyhearing.Inaturallydefendhim,andthatonlymakesmattersworse.Yesterdayhemademeindignant,forhealsoalludedtome."Thecount,"hesaid,"isamanoftheworld,andagoodmanofbusiness:hisstyleisgood,andhewriteswithfacility;but,likeothergeniuses,hehasnosolidlearning."HelookedatmewithanexpressionthatseemedtoaskifIfelttheblow.Butitdidnotproducethedesiredeffect:Idespiseamanwhocanthinkandactinsuchamanner.However,Imadeastand,andansweredwithnotalittlewarmth.Thecount,Isaid,wasamanentitledtorespect,alikeforhischaracterandhisacquirements.Ihadnevermetapersonwhosemindwasstoredwithmoreusefulandextensiveknowledge,——whohad,infact,masteredsuchaninfinitevarietyofsubjects,andwhoyetretainedallhisactivityforthedetailsofordinarybusiness.Thiswasaltogetherbeyondhiscomprehension;andItookmyleave,lestmyangershouldbetoohighlyexcitedbysomenewabsurdityofhis.
　　Andyouaretoblameforallthis,youwhopersuadedmetobendmynecktothisyokebypreachingalifeofactivitytome.Ifthemanwhoplantsvegetables,andcarrieshiscorntotownonmarket-days,isnotmoreusefullyemployedthanIam,thenletmeworktenyearslongeratthegalleystowhichIamnowchained.
　　Oh,thebrilliantwretchedness,theweariness,thatoneisdoomedtowitnessamongthesillypeoplewhomwemeetinsocietyhere!Theambitionofrank!Howtheywatch,howtheytoil,togainprecedence!Whatpoorandcontemptiblepassionsaredisplayedintheirutternakedness!Wehaveawomanhere,forexample,whoneverceasestoentertainthecompanywithaccountsofherfamilyandherestates.Anystrangerwouldconsiderherasillybeing,whoseheadwasturnedbyherpretensionstorankandproperty;butsheisinrealityevenmoreridiculous,thedaughterofameremagistrate'sclerkfromthisneighbourhood.Icannotunderstandhowhumanbeingscansodebasethemselves.
　　EverydayIobservemoreandmorethefollyofjudgingofothersbyourselves;andIhavesomuchtroublewithmyseif,andmyownheartisinsuchconstantagitation,thatIamwellcontenttoletotherspursuetheirowncourse,iftheyonlyallowmethesameprivilege.
　　Whatprovokesmemostistheunhappyextenttowhichdistinctionsofrankarecarried.Iknowperfectlywellhownecessaryareinequalitiesofcondition,andIamsensibleoftheadvantagesImyselfderivetherefrom;butIwouldnothavetheseinstitutionsproveabarriertothesmallchanceofhappinesswhichImayenjoyonthisearth.
　　IhavelatelybecomeacquaintedwithaMissB——,averyagreeablegirl,whohasretainedhernaturalmannersinthemidstofartificiallife.Ourfirstconversationpleasedusbothequally;and,attakingleave,Irequestedpermissiontovisither.Sheconsentedinsoobligingamanner,thatIwaitedwithimpatienceforthearrivalofthehappymoment.Sheisnotanativeofthisplace,butresidesherewithheraunt.Thecountenanceoftheoldladyisnotprepossessing.Ipaidhermuchattention,addressingthegreaterpartofmyconversationtoher;and,inlessthanhalfanhour,Idiscoveredwhatherniecesubsequentlyacknowledgedtome,thatheragedaunt,havingbutasmallfortune,andastillsmallershareofunderstanding,enjoysnosatisfactionexceptinthepedigreeofherancestors,noprotectionsaveinhernoblebirth,andnoenjoymentbutinlookingfromhercastleovertheheadsofthehumblecitizens.Shewas,nodoubt,handsomeinheryouth,andinherearlyyearsprobablytrifledawayhertimeinrenderingmanyapooryouththesportofhercaprice:inherriperyearsshehassubmittedtotheyokeofaveteranofficer,who,inreturnforherpersonandhersmallindependence,hasspentwithherwhatwemaydesignateherageofbrass.Heisdead;andsheisnowawidow,anddeserted.Shespendsherironagealone,andwouldnotbeapproached,exceptforthelovelinessofherniece.
　　JANUARY8,1772.
　　Whatbeingsaremen,whosewholethoughtsareoccupiedwithformandceremony,whoforyearstogetherdevotetheirmentalandphysicalexertionstothetaskofadvancingthemselvesbutonestep,andendeavouringtooccupyahigherplaceatthetable.Notthatsuchpersonswouldotherwisewantemployment:onthecontrary,theygivethemselvesmuchtroublebyneglectingimportantbusinessforsuchpettytrifles.Lastweekaquestionofprecedencearoseatasledging-party,andallouramusementwasspoiled.
　　Thesillycreaturescannotseethatitisnotplacewhichconstitutesrealgreatness,sincethemanwhooccupiesthefirstplacebutseldomplaystheprincipalpart.Howmanykingsaregovernedbytheirministers——howmanyministersbytheirsecretaries?Who,insuchcases,isreallythechief?He,asitseemstome,whocanseethroughtheothers,andpossessesstrengthorskillenoughtomaketheirpowerorpassionssubservienttotheexecutionofhisowndesigns.
　　JANUARY20.
　　Imustwritetoyoufromthisplace,mydearCharlotte,fromasmallroominacountryinn,whereIhavetakenshelterfromaseverestorm.DuringmywholeresidenceinthatwretchedplaceD——,whereIlivedamongststrangers,——strangers,indeed,tothisheart,——Ineveratanytimefeltthesmallestinclinationtocorrespondwithyou;butinthiscottage,inthisretirement,inthissolitude,withthesnowandhailbeatingagainstmylattice-pane,youaremyfirstthought.TheinstantIentered,yourfigureroseupbeforeme,andtheremembrance!OmyCharlotte,thesacred,tenderremembrance!GraciousHeaven!restoretomethehappymomentofourfirstacquaintance.
　　Couldyoubutseeme,mydearCharlotte,inthewhirlofdissipation,——howmysensesaredriedup,butmyheartisatnotimefull.Ienjoynosinglemomentofhappiness:allisvain——nothingtouchesme.Istand,asitwere,beforetheraree-show:Iseethelittlepuppetsmove,andIaskwhetheritisnotanopticalillusion.Iamamusedwiththesepuppets,or,rather,Iammyselfoneofthem:but,whenIsometimesgraspmyneighbour'shand,If...剩余内容请长按扫描二维码或下载丁香书院APP继续免费看：

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