ANN。Howdoyouknow，then？
　　WELLWYN。CameacrossSirThomasontheEmbankmentyesterday;toldmeoldTimso——hadbeenhadupagainforsittingdowninfrontofabrewer’sdray。
　　ANN。Why？
　　WELLWYN。Well，yousee，assoonashecameoutofthewhatd’youcall’em，hegotdrunkforaweek，anditlefthiminlowspirits。
　　BERTLEY。Doyoumeanhedeliberatelysatdown，withtheintention——of——er？
　　WELLWYN。Saidhewastiredoflife，buttheydidn’tbelievehim。
　　ANN。RatherascoreforSirThomas！Isupposehe’dtoldtheProfessor？Whatdidhesay？
　　WELLWYN。Well，theProfessorsaid[withaquickglanceatBERTLEY]
　　hefelttherewasnothingforsomeofthesepoordevilsbutalethalchamber。
　　BERTLEY。[Shocked。]Didhereally！
　　[HehasnotyetcaughtWELLWYN’sglance。]
　　WELLWYN。AndSirThomasagreed。Historicoccasion。Andyou，VicarH’m！
　　[BERTLEYwinces。]
　　ANN。[Toherself。]Well，thereisn’t。
　　BERTLEY。Andyet！Somegoodintheoldfellow，nodoubt，ifonecouldputone’sfingeronit。[Preparingtogo。]You’llletusknow，then，whenyou’resettled。Whatwastheaddress？[WELLWYN
　　takesoutandhandshimacard。]Ah！yes。Good—bye，Ann。
　　Good—bye，Wellyn。[Thewindblowshishatalongthestreet。]Whatawind！[Hegoes，pursuing。]
　　ANN。[Whohaseyedthecardaskance。]Daddy，haveyoutoldthoseothertwowherewe’regoing？
　　WELLWYN。Whichothertwo，mydear？
　　ANN。TheProfessorandSirThomas。
　　WELLWYN。Well，Ann，naturallyI
　　ANN。[Jumpingontothedaiswithdisgust。]Oh，dear！WhenI’mtryingtogetyouawayfromallthisatmosphere。Idon’tsomuchmindtheVicarknowing，becausehe’sgotaweakheart
　　[Shejumpsoffagain。]
　　WELLWYN。[Tohimself。]Seventhfloor！Ifelttherewassomething。
　　ANN。[Preparingtogo。]I’mgoingroundnow。Butyoumuststayheretillthevancomesback。Anddon’tforgetyoutippedthemenafterthefirstload。
　　WELLWYN。Oh！Yes，yes。[Uneasily。]Goodsortstheylook，thosefellows！
　　ANN。[Scrutinisinghim。]Whathaveyoudone？
　　WELLWYN。Nothing，mydear，really！
　　ANN。What？
　　WELLWYN。I——IratherthinkImayhavetippedthemtwice。
　　ANN。[Drily。]Daddy！IfitisthefirstofApril，it’snotnecessarytomakeafoolofoneself。That’sthelasttimeyoueverdotheseridiculousthings。[WELLWYNeyesheraskance。]I’mgoingtoseethatyouspendyourmoneyonyourself。Youneedn’tlookatmelikethat！Imeanto。AssoonasI’vegotyouawayfromhere，andall——these
　　WELLWYN。Don’trubitin，Ann！
　　ANN。[Givinghimasuddenhug——thengoingtothedoor——withasortoftriumph。]Deeds，notwords，Daddy！
　　[Shegoesout，andthewindcatchingherscarfblowsitoutbeneathherfirmyoungchin。WELLWYNreturningtothefire，standsbrooding，andgazingathisextinctcigarette。
　　WELLWYN。[Tohimself。]Badlot——lowtype！Nomethod！Notheory！
　　[IntheopendoorwayappearFERRANDandMRS。MEGAN。Theystand，unseen，lookingathim。FERRANDismoreragged，ifpossible，thanonChristmasEve。Hischinandcheeksareclothedinareddishgoldenbeard。MRS。MEGAN’sdressisnotsowoe—begone，butherfaceiswhite，hereyesdark—circled。
　　Theywhisper。Sheslipsbackintotheshadowofthedoorway。
　　WELLWYNturnsatthesound，andstaresatFERRANDinamazement。]
　　FERRAND。[Advancing。]Enchantedtoseeyou，Monsieur。[Helooksroundtheemptyroom。]Youareleaving？
　　WELLWYN。[Nodding——thentakingtheyoungman’shand。]Howgoesit？
　　FERRAND。[Displayinghimself，simply。]Asyousee，Monsieur。I
　　havedoneofmybest。Itstillfliesfromme。
　　WELLWYN。[Sadly——asifagainsthiswill。]Ferrand，itwillalwaysfly。
　　[Theyoungforeignershiverssuddenlyfromheadtofoot;thencontrolshimselfwithagreateffort。]
　　FERRAND。Don’tsaythat，Monsieur！Itistoomuchtheechoofmyheart。
　　WELLWYN。Forgiveme！Ididn’tmeantopainyou。
　　FERRAND。[Drawingnearerthefire。]Thatoldcabby，Monsieur，youremember——theytellme，henearlysucceededtogainhappinesstheotherday。
　　[WELLWYNnods。]
　　FERRAND。AndthoseSirs，sointerestedinhim，withtheirtheories？
　　Hehaswornthemout？[WELLWYNnods。]Thatgoeswithoutsaying。
　　Andnowtheywishforhimthelethalchamber。
　　WELLWYN。[Startled。]Howdidyouknowthat？
　　[Thereissilence。
　　FERRAND。[Staringintothefire。]Monsieur，whileIwasontheroadthistimeIfellillofafever。ItseemedtomeinmyillnessthatIsawthetruth——howIwaswastinginthisworld——Iwouldneverbegoodforanyone——noranyoneforme——allwouldgoby，andI
　　neverofit——fame，andfortune，andpeace，eventhenecessitiesoflife，evermockingme。
　　[Hedrawsclosertothefire，spreadinghisfingerstotheflame。Andwhileheisspeaking，throughthedoorwayMRS。
　　MEGANcreepsintolisten。]
　　FERRAND。[Speakingonintothefire。]AndIsaw，Monsieur，soplain，thatIshouldbevagabondallmydays，andmydaysshort，I
　　dyingintheendthedeathofadog。Isawitallinmyfever——
　　clearasthatflame——therewasnothingforusothers，buttheherbofdeath。[WELLWYNtakeshisarmandpressesit。]Andso，Monsieur，Iwishedtodie。Itoldnooneofmyfever。Ilayoutontheground——itwasverreecold。Buttheywouldnotletmedieontheroadsoftheirparishes——theytookmetoanInstitution，Monsieur，IlookedintheireyeswhileIlaythere，andIsawmoreclearthantheblueheaventhattheythoughtitbestthatIshoulddie，althoughtheywouldnotletme。ThenMonsieur，naturallymyspiritrose，andIsaid:"Somuchtheworseforyou。Iwilllivealittlemore。"Oneismadelikethat！Lifeissweet，Monsieur。
　　WELLWYN。Yes，Ferrand;Lifeissweet。
　　FERRAND。Thatlittlegirlyouhadhere，Monsieur[WELLWYNnods。]
　　inhertoothereissomethingofwild—savage。Shemusthavejoyoflife。IhaveseenhersinceIcameback。Shehasembracedthelifeofjoy。Itisnotquitethesamething。[Helowershisvoice。]
　　Sheislost，Monsieur，asastonethatsinksinwater。Icansee，ifshecannot。[AsWELLWYNmakesamovementofdistress。]Oh！I
　　amnottoblameforthat，Monsieur。IthadwellbegunbeforeIknewher。
　　WELLWYN。Yes，yes——Iwasafraidofit，atthetime。
　　[MRS。MEGANturnssilently，andslipsaway。]
　　FEERRAND。Idomybestforher，Monsieur，butlookatme！Besides，Iamnotgoodforher——itisnotgoodforsimplesoulstobewiththosewhoseethingsclear。Forthegreatpartofmankind，toseeanything——isfatal。
　　WELLWYN。Evenforyou，itseems。
　　FERRAND。No，Monsieur。Tobesoneartodeathhasdonemegood;I
　　shallnotlackcourageanymoretillthewindblowsonmygrave。
　　SinceIsawyou，Monsieur，IhavebeeninthreeInstitutions。Theyarepalaces。Onemayeatuponthefloor——thoughitistrue——forKings——theyeattoomuchofskillythere。Onelittlethingtheylack——thosepalaces。Itisunderstandingofthe’umanheart。Inthemtamebirdspluckwildbirdsnaked。
　　WELLWYN。Theymeanwell。
　　FERRAND。Ah！Monsieur，Iamloafer，waster——whatyoulike——forallthat[bitterly]povertyismyonlycrime。IfIwererich，shouldInotbesimplyvereeoriginal，’ighlyrespected，withsoulabovecommerce，travellingtoseetheworld？Andthatyounggirl，wouldshenotbe"thatcharmingladee，""vereechic，youknow！"AndtheoldTims——goodold—fashionedgentleman——drinkinghisliquorwell。
　　Eh！bien——whatarewenow？Darkbeasts，despisedbyall。Thatislife，Monsieur。[Hestaresintothefire。]
　　WELLWYN。We’reourownenemies，Ferrand。Icanaffordit——youcan’t。Quitetrue！
　　FERRAND。[Earnestly。]Monsieur，doyouknowthis？Youarethesolebeingthatcandousgood——wehopelessones。
　　WELLWYN。[Shakinghishead。]Notabitofit;I’mhopelesstoo。
　　FERRAND。[Eagerly。]Monsieur，itisjustthat。Youunderstand。
　　Whenwearewithyouwefeelsomething——here——[hetoucheshisheart。]IfIhadoneprayertomake，itwouldbe，GoodGod，givemetounderstand！Thosesirs，withtheirtheories，theycancleanourskinsandchainour’abits——thatsoothesforthemtheaestheticsense;itgivesthemtootheirgoodlittleimportance。Butourspiritstheycannottouch，fortheynevareunderstand。Withoutthat，Monsieur，allisdryasaparchedskinoforange。
　　WELLWYN。Don’tbesobitter。Thinkofalltheworktheydo！
　　FERRAND。Monsieur，oftheirindustryIsaynothing。Theydoagoodworkwhiletheyattendwiththeirtheoriestothesickandthetameold，andthegoodunfortunatedeserving。Abovealltothelittlechildren。But，Monsieur，whenallisdone，therearealwaysushopelessones。Whatcantheydowithme，Monsieur，withthatgirl，orwiththatoldman？Ah！Monsieur，we，too，’aveourqualities，weothers——itwantsyoucouragetoundertakeacareerlikemine，orlikethatyounggirl’s。Wewildones——weknowathousandtimesmoreoflifethaneverwillthosesirs。Theywastetheirtimetryingtomakerookswhite。Bekindtousifyouwill，orletusalonelikeMeesAnn，butdonottrytochangeourskins。Leaveustolive，orleaveustodiewhenwelikeinthefreeair。Ifyoudonotwishofus，youhavebuttoshutyourpocketsand——yourdoors——weshalldiethefaster。
　　WELLWYN。[Withagitation。]Butthat，youknow——wecan’tdo——nowcanwe？
　　FERRAND。Ifyoucannot，howisitourfault？Theharmwedotoothers——isitsomuch？IfIamcriminal，dangerous——shutmeup！
　　Iwouldnotpitymyself——nevare。Butweinwhomsomethingmoves——
　　likethatflame，Monsieur，thatcannotkeepstill——weothers——wearenotmany——thatmusthavemotioninourlives，donotletthemmakeusprisoners，withtheirtheories，becausewearenotlikethem——itislifeitselftheywouldenclose！[Hedrawsuphistatteredfigure，thenbendingoverthefireagain。]Iaskyourpardon;Iamtalking。IfIcouldsmoke，Monsieur！
　　[WELLWYNhandshimatobaccopouch;andherollsacigarettewithhisyellow—Stainedfingers。
　　FERRAND。ThegoodGodmademesothatIwouldratherwalkawholemonthofnights，hungry，withthestars，thansitonesingledaymakingroundbusinessonanofficestool！Itisnottomyadvantage。IcannothelpitthatIamavagabond。Whatwouldyouhave？Itisstrongerthanme。[HelookssuddenlyatWELLWYN。]
　　Monsieur，IsaytoyouthingsIhaveneversaid。
　　WELLWYN。[Quietly。]Goon，goon。[Thereissilence。]
　　FERRAND。[Suddenly。]Monsieur！AreyoureallyEnglish？TheEnglisharesocivilised。
　　WELLWYN。AndamInot？
　　FERRAND。Youtreatmelikeabrother。
　　[WELLWYNhasturnedtowardsthestreetdooratasoundoffeet，andtheclamourofvoices。]
　　TIMSON。[Fromthestreet。]Takeherin’ere。Iknows’im。
　　[ThroughtheopendoorwaycomeaPOLICECONSTABLEandaLOAFER，bearingbetweenthemthelimpwhitefacedformofMRS。MEGAN，hatlessandwithdrownedhair，envelopedinthepoliceman’swaterproof。Somecuriouspersonsbringuptherear，jostlinginthedoorway，amongwhomisTIMSONcarryinginhishandsthepoliceman’sdrippingwaterprooflegpieces。]
　　FERRAND。[Startingforward。]Monsieur，itisthatlittlegirl！
　　WELLWYN。What’shappened？Constable！What’shappened！
　　[TheCONSTABLEandLOAFERhavelaidthebodydownonthedais;
　　withWELLWYNandFERRANDtheystandbendingoverher。]
　　CONSTABLE。’Temptedsooicide，sir;butshehadn’tbeeninthewater’arfaminutewhenIgotholdofher。[Hebendslower。]Can’tunderstandhercollapsin’likethis。
　　WELLWYN。[Feelingherheart。]Idon’tfeelanything。
　　FERRAND。[Inavoicesharpenedbyemotion。]Letmetry，Monsieur。
　　CONSTABLE。[Touchinghisarm。]Youkeepoff，mylad。
　　WELLWYN。No，constable——lethim。He’sherfriend。
　　CONSTABLE。[ReleasingFERRAND——totheLOAFER。]Hereyou！Cutoffforadoctor—sharpnow！[Hepushesbackthecuriouspersons。]Nowthen，standawaythere，please——wecan’thaveyouroundthebody。
　　Keepback——Clearout，now！
　　[Heslowlymovesthemback，andatlastshepherdsthemthroughthedoorandshutsitonthem，TIMSONbeinglast。
　　FERRAND。Therum！
　　[WELLWYNfetchesthedecanter。WiththelittlethereisleftFERRANDchafesthegirl’shandsandforehead，andpourssomebetweenherlips。Butthereisnoresponsefromtheinertbody。]
　　FERRAND。Hersoulisstillaway，Monsieur！
　　[WELLWYN，seizingthedecanter，poursintoitteaandboilingwater。
　　CONSTABLE。It’sneverdrownin’，sir——herheadwashardlyunder;I
　　wasontoherlikeknife。
　　FERRAND。[Rubbingherfeet。]Shehasnotyetherphilosophy，Monsieur;atthebeginningtheyoftentry。Ifsheisdead！[Inavoiceofawedrapture。]Whatfortune！
　　CONSTABLE。[Withpuzzledsadness。]Trueenough，sir——that！We’djustbeguntoknow’er。Ifshe’asbeentaken——herbestfriendscouldn’twish’erbetter。
　　WELLWYN。[Applyingthedecantertoherdips。]Poorlittlething！
　　I’lltrythishottea。
　　FERRAND。[Whispering。]’Lamort——legrandami！’
　　WELLWYN。Look！Lookather！She’scominground！
　　[AfainttremorpassesoverMRS。MEGAN’sbody。Heagainappliesthehotdrinktohermouth。Shestirsandgulps。]
　　CONSTABLE。[Withintenserelief。]That’sbrave！Goodlass！
　　She’llpickupnow，sir。
　　[Then，seeingthatTIMSONandthecuriouspersonshaveagainopenedthedoor，hedrivesthemout，andstandswithhisbackagainstit。MRS。MEGANcomestoherself。]
　　WELLWYN。[Sittingonthedaisandsupportingher——asiftoachild。]Thereyouare，mydear。There，there——betternow！That’sright。Drinkalittlemoreofthistea。
　　[MRS。MEGANdrinksfromthedecanter。]
　　FERRAND。[Rising。]Bringhertothefire，Monsieur。
　　[Theytakehertothefireandseatheronthelittlestool。
　　FromthemomentofherrestoredanimationFERRANDhasresumedhisairofcynicaldetachment，andnowstandsapartwitharmsfolded，watching。]
　　WELLWYN。Feelingbetter，mychild？
　　MRS。MEGAN。Yes。
　　WELLWYN。That’sgood。That’sgood。Now，howwasit？Um？
　　MRS。MEGAN。Idunno。[Sheshivers。]Iwasstandin’herejustnowwhenyouwastalkin’，andwhenIheard’im，itcam’overmetodoit——like。
　　WELLWYN。Ah，yesIknow。
　　MRS。MEGAN。Ididn’tseemnogoodtomeselfnoranyone。ButwhenIgotinthewater，Ididn’twanttoanymore。Itwascoldinthere。
　　WELLWYN。Haveyoubeenhavingsuchabadtimeofit？
　　MRS。MEGAN。Yes。Andlistenin’tohimupsetme。[ShesignswithherheadatFERRAND。]IfeelbetternowI’vebeeninthewater。
　　[Shesmilesandshivers。]
　　WELLWYN。There，there！Shivery？Liketowalkupanddownalittle？
　　[Theybeginwalkingtogetherupanddown。]
　　WELLWYN。Beastlywhenyourheadgoesunder？
　　MRS。MEGAN。Yes。Itfrightenedme。IthoughtIwouldn’tcomeupagain。
　　WELLWYN。Iknow——sortofworldwithoutend，wasn’tit？Whatdidyouthinkof，um？
　　MRS。MEGAN。IwishedI’adn’tjumped——an’Ithoughtofmybaby——
　　thatdied——and——[inarathersurprisedvoice]andIthoughtofd—dancin’。
　　[Hermouthquivers，herfacepuckers，shegivesachokeandalittlesob。
　　WELLWYN。[Stoppingandstrokingher。]There，there——there！
　　[Foramomentherfaceisburiedinhissleeve，thensherecoversherself。
　　MRS。MEGAN。Then’egotholdo’me，an’pulledmeout。
　　WELLWYN。Ah！whatacomfort——um？
　　MRS。MEGAN。Yes。Thewatergotintomemouth。
　　[Theywalkagain。]Iwouldn’thavegonetodoitbutforhim。
　　[ShelookstowardsFERRAND。]Histalkmademefeelallfunny，asifpeoplewantedmeto。
　　WELLWYN。Mydearchild！Don’tthinksuchthings！Asifanyonewould！
　　MRS。MEGAN。[Stolidly。]Ithoughttheydid。Theyusedtolookatmesosometimes，whereIwasbeforeIranaway——Icouldn’tstopthere，youknow。
　　WELLWYN。Toocooped—up？
　　MRS。MEGAN。Yes。Nolifeatall，itwasn’t——notaftersellin’
　　flowers，I’dratherbedoin’whatIam。
　　WELLWYN。Ah！Well—it’sallover，now！Howd’youfeel——eh？
　　Better？
　　MRS。MEGAN。Yes。Ifeelsallrightnow。
　　[Shesitsupagainonthelittlestoolbeforethefire。]
　　WELLWYN。Noshivers，andnoaches;quitecomfy？
　　MRS。MEGAN。Yes。
　　WELLWYN。That’sablessing。Allwell，now，Constable——thankyou！
　　CONSTABLE。[Whohasremaineddiscreetlyapartatthedoor—cordially。]Firstrate，sir！That’scapital！[HeapproachesandscrutinisesMRS。MEGAN。]Rightasrain，eh，mygirl？
　　MRS。MEGAN。[Shrinkingalittle。]Yes。
　　CONSTABLE。That’sfine。ThenIthinkperhaps，for’ersake，sir，thesoonerwemoveonandgetherachangeo’clothin’，thebetter。
　　WELLWYN。Oh！don’tbotheraboutthat——I’llsendroundformydaughter——we’llmanageforherhere。
　　CONSTABLE。Verykindofyou，I’msure，sir。But[withembarrassment]sheseemsallright。She’llgeteveryattentionatthestation。
　　WELLWYN。ButIassureyou，wedon’tmindatall;we’lltakethegreatestcareofher。
　　CONSTABLE。[Stillmoreembarrassed。]Well，sir，ofcourse，I’mthinkin’of——I’mafraidIcan’tdepartfromtheusualcourse。
　　WELLWYN。[Sharply。]What！But—oh！No！No！That’llbeallright，Constable！That’llbeallright！Iassureyou。
　　CONSTABLE。[Withmoredecision。]I’llhavetochargeher，sir。
　　WELLWYN。GoodGod！Youdon’tmeantosaythepoorlittlethinghasgottobe
　　CONSTABLE。[Consultingwithhim。]Well，sir，wecan’tgetoverthefacts，canwe？Thereitis！Youknowwhatsooicideamountsto——
　　it’sanawkwardjob。
　　WELLWYN。[Calminghimselfwithaneffort。]Butlookhere，Constable，asareasonableman——Thispoorwretchedlittlegirl——youknowwhatthatlifemeansbetterthananyone！Why！It’stohercredittotryandjumpoutofit！
　　[TheCONSTABLEshakeshishead。]
　　WELLWYN。Yousaidyourselfherbestfriendscouldn’twishherbetter！[Droppinghisvoicestillmore。]Everybodyfeelsit！TheVicarwashereafewminutesagosayingtheverysamething——theVicar，Constable！[TheCONSTABLEshakeshishead。]Ah！now，lookhere，Iknowsomethingofher。Nothingcanbedonewithher。Wealladmitit。Don’tyousee？Well，thenhangit——youneedn’tgoandmakefoolsofusallby
　　FERRAND。Monsieur，itisthefirstofApril。
　　CONSTABLE。[Withasharpglanceathim。]Can’tneglectmeduty，sir;that’simpossible。
　　WELLWYN。Lookhere！She——slipped。She’sbeentellingme。Come，Constable，there’sagoodfellow。Maybethemakingofher，this。
　　CONSTABLE。Iquiteappreciateyourgood’eart，sir，an’youmakeitvery’ardforme——but，comenow！Iputittoyouasagentleman，wouldyougobackonyerdutyifyouwasme？
　　[WELLWYNraiseshishat，andplungeshisfingersthroughandthroughhishair。]
　　WELLWYN。Well！Godinheaven！Ofallthed———dtopsy——turvy——！
　　Notasoulintheworldwantsheralive——andnowshe’stobeprosecutedfortryingtobewhereeveryonewishesher。
　　CONSTABLE。Come，sir，come！Beaman！
　　[ThroughoutallthisMRS。MEGANhassatstolidlybeforethefire，butasFERRANDsuddenlystepsforwardshelooksupathim。]
　　FERRAND。Donotgrieve，Monsieur！Thiswillgivehercourage。
　　Thereisnothingthatgivesmorecouragethantoseetheironyofthings。[HetouchesMRS。MEGAN’Sshoulder。]Go，mychild;itwilldoyougood。
　　[MRS。MEGANrises，andlooksathimdazedly。]
　　CONSTABLE。[Comingforward，andtakingherbythehand。]That’smygoodlass。Comealong！Wewon’thurtyou。
　　MRS。MEGAN。Idon’twanttogo。They’llstareatme。
　　CONSTABLE。[Comforting。]Notthey！I’llseetothat。
　　WELLWYN。[Veryupset。]Takeherinacab，Constable，ifyoumust—
　　—forGod’ssake！[Hepullsoutashilling。]Here！
　　CONSTABLE。[Takingtheshilling。]Iwill，sir，certainly。Don’tthinkIwantto
　　WELLWYN。No，no，Iknow。You’reagoodsort。
　　CONSTABLE。[Comfortable。]Don’tyoutakeon，sir。It’sherfirsttry;theywon’tbehardon’er。Likeasnotonlybind’eroverinherownrecogs。nottodoitagain。Come，mydear。
　　MRS。MEGAN。[Tryingtofreeherselffromthepoliceman’scloak。]I
　　wanttotakethisoff。Itlookssofunny。
　　[AsshespeaksthedoorisopenedbyANN;behindwhomisdimlyseentheformofoldTIMSON，stillheadingthecuriouspersons。]
　　ANN。[Lookingfromonetotheotherinamazement。]Whatisit？
　　What’shappened？Daddy！
　　FERRAND。[Outofthesilence。]Itisnothing，Ma’moiselle！Shehasfailedtodrownherself。Theyrunherinalittle。
　　WELLWYN。Lendheryourjacket，mydear;she’llcatchherdeath。
　　[ANN，feelingMRS。MEGAN’sarm，stripsofherjacket，andhelpsherintoitwithoutaword。]
　　CONSTABLE。[Donninghiscloak。]Thankyou。Miss——verygoodofyou，I’msure。
　　MRS。MEGAN。[Mazed。]It’swarm！
　　[Shegivesthemallalasthalf—smilinglook，andPasseswiththeCONSTABLEthroughthedoorway。]
　　FERRAND。Thatmakesthethirdofus，Monsieur。Wearenotinluck。
　　Towishusdead，itseems，iseasierthantoletusdie。
　　[HelooksatANN，whoisstandingwithhereyesfixedonherfather。WELLWYNhastakenfromhispocketavisitingcard。]
　　WELLWYN。[ToFERRAND。]Herequick;takethis，runafterher！Whenthey’vedonewithhertellhertocometous。
　　FERRAND。[Takingthecard，andreadingtheaddress。]"No。7，HavenHouse，FlightStreet！"Relyonme，Monsieur——Iwillbringhermyselftocallonyou。’Aurevoir，monbonMonsieur’！
　　[HebendsoverWELLWYN’shand;then，withabowtoANNgoesout;histatteredfigurecanbeseenthroughthewindow，passinginthewind。WELLWYNturnsbacktothefire。ThefigureofTIMSONadvancesintothedoorway，nolongerholdingineitherhandawaterproofleg—piece。
　　TIMSON。[Inacroakyvoice。]Sir！
　　WELLWYN。What——you，Timson？
　　TIMSON。Onmelarstlegs，sir。’Ere！Youcansee’emforyerself！
　　Shawn’ttroubleyerlong……
　　WELLWYN。[Afteralonganddesperatestare。]Notnow——TIMSONnotnow！Takethis！[Hetakesoutanothercard，andhandsittoTIMSON]Someothertime。
　　TIMSON。[Takingthecard。]Yernewaddress！Youareagen’leman。
　　[Helurchesslowlyaway。]
　　[ANNshutsthestreetdoorandsetsherbackagainstit。Therumbleoftheapproachingvanisheardoutside。Itceases。]
　　ANN。[Inafatefulvoice。]Daddy！[Theystareateachother。]Doyouknowwhatyou’vedone？Givenyourcardtothosesixrotters。
　　WELLWYN。[Withablankstare。]Six？
　　ANN。[Staringroundthenakedroom。]Whatwasthegoodofthis？
　　WELLWYN。[Followinghereyes———verygravely。]Ann！Itisstrongerthanme。
　　[WithoutawordANNopensthedoor，andwalksstraightout。
　　Withaheavysigh，WELLWYNsinksdownonthelittlestoolbeforethefire。Thethreehumble—mencomein。]
　　CHIEFHUMBLE—MAN。[Inanattitudeofexpectation。]Thisisthelarstofit，sir。
　　WELLWYN。Oh！Ah！yes！
　　[Hegivesthemmoney;thensomethingseemstostrikehim，andheexhibitscertainsignsofvexation。Suddenlyherecovers，looksfromonetotheother，andthenattheteathings。A
　　faintsmilecomesonhisface。]
　　WELLWYN。Youcanfinishthedecanter。
　　[Hegoesoutinhaste。]
　　CHIEFHUMBLE—MAN。[Clinkingthecoins。]Thirdtimeofarskin’！
　　Aprilfool！Not’arf！Goodoldpigeon！
　　SECONDHUMBLE—MAN。’Umanbeing，Icall’im。
　　CHIEFHUMBLE—MAN。[Takingthethreeglassesfromthelastpacking—case，andpouringveryequallyintothem。]That’sright。
　　Tellyouwot，I’dnever’atouchedthisunless’e’dtoldmeto，I
　　wouldn’t——notwith’im。
　　SECONDHUMBLE—MAN。Dittotothat！Thisisabitoforlright！
　　[Raisinghisglass。]Goodluck！
　　THIRDHUMBLE—MAN。Same’ere！
　　[Simultaneouslytheyplacetheirlipssmartlyagainsttheliquor，andatonceletfalltheirfacesandtheirglasses。
　　CHIEFHUMBLE—MAN。[Withgreatsolemnity。]Crikey！Bill！Tea！……’E’sgotus！
　　[Thestageisblotteddark。]
　　Curtain。