"Well，then，hewaswithme，andyoumustnotbeangry，foryouthencompletedyourconquestofhim。Headmiredyourcharacter，yourlove，yoursentiments，yourhonesty。Hecouldnothelpexpressinghisastonishmentattherectitiideofmyinstinct，orhisapprovalofthepassionIfeltforyou。Itwashewhoconsoledmeinthemorningassuringmethatyouwouldcertainlycomebacktomeassoonasyouknewmyrealfeelings，theloyaltyofmyintentionsandmygoodfaith。"
"Butyoumustoftenhavefallenasleep，forunlessexcitedbysomepowerfulinterest，itisimpossibletopasseighthoursindarknessandinsilence。"
"Weweremovedbythedeepestinterest:besides，wewereindarknessonlywhenwekepttheseholesopen。Theplankwasonduringoursupper，andwewerelisteninginreligioussilencetoyourslightestwhisper。Theinterestwhichkeptmyfriendawakewasperhapsgreaterthanmine。Hetoldmethatheneverhadhadbeforeabetteropportunityofstudyingthehumanheart，andthatyoumusthavepassedthemostpainfulnight。Hetrulypitiedyou。WeweredelightedwithC————C————，foritisindeedwonderfulthatayounggirloffifteenshouldreasonasshedidtojustifymyconduct，withoutanyotherweaponsbutthosegivenherbynatureandtruth；
shemusthavethesoulofanangel。Ifyouevermarryher，youwillhavethemostheavenlywife。IshallofcoursefeelmiserableifI
loseher，butyourhappinesswillmakeamendsforall。Doyouknow，dearest，thatIcannotunderstandhowyoucouldfallinlovewithmeafterhavingknownher，anymorethanIcanconceivehowshedoesnothatemeeversinceshehasdiscoveredthatIhaverobbedherofyourheart。MydearC————C————hastrulysomethingdivineinherdisposition。Doyouknowwhysheconfidedtoyouherbarrenloveswithme？Because，asshetoldmeherself，shewishedtoeaseherconscience，thinkingthatshewasinsomemeasureunfaithfultoyou。"
"Doesshethinkherselfboundtobeentirelyfaithfultome，withtheknowledgeshehasnowofmyownunfaithfulness？"
"Sheisparticularlydelicateandconscientious，andthoughshebelievesherselftrulyyourwife，shedoesnotthinkthatshehasanyrighttocontrolyouractions，butshebelievesherselfboundtogiveyouanaccountofallshedoes。"
"Noblegirl！"
Theprudentwifeofthedoor—keeperhavingbroughtthesupper，wesatdowntothewell—suppliedtable。M————M————remarkedthatIhadbecomemuchthinner。
"Thepainsofthebodydonotfattenaman，"Isaid，"andthesufferingsofthemindemaciatehim。Butwehavesufferedsufficiently，andwemustbewiseenoughnevertorecallanythingwhichcanbepainfultous。"
"Youarequiteright，mylove；theinstantsthatmaniscompelledtogiveuptomisfortuneortosufferingareasmanymomentsstolenfromhislife，buthedoubleshisexistencewhenhehasthetalentofmultiplyinghispleasures，nomatterofwhatnaturetheymaybe。"
Weamusedourselvesintalkingoverpastdangers，Pierrot’sdisguise，andtheballatBriati，whereshehadbeentoldthatanotherPierrothadmadehisappearance。
M————M————wonderedattheextraordinaryeffectofadisguise，for，saidshetome:
"ThePierrotintheparlouroftheconventseemedtometallerandthinnerthanyou。Ifchancehadnotmadeyoutaketheconventgondola，ifyouhadnothadthestrangeideaofassumingthedisguiseofPierrot，Ishouldnothaveknownwhoyouwere，formyfriendsintheconventwouldnothavebeeninterestedinyou。IwasdelightedwhenIheardthatyouwerenotapatrician，asIfeared，because，hadyoubeenone，Imightintimehaverunsomegreatdanger。"
Iknewverywellwhatshehadtofear，butpretendingcompleteignorance:
"Icannotconceive，"Isaid，"whatdangeryoumightrunonaccountofmybeingapatrician。"
"Mydarling，Icannotspeaktoyouopenly，unlessyougivemeyourwordtodowhatIamgoingtoaskyou。"
"HowcouldIhesitate，mylove，indoinganythingtopleaseyou，providedmyhonourisnotimplicated？Havewenotnoweverythingincommon？Speak，idolofmyheart，tellmeyourreasons，andrelyuponmylove；itistheguaranteeofmyreadycomplianceineverythingthatcangiveyoupleasure:"
"Verywell。Iwantyoutogiveasupperinyourcasinotomeandmyfriend，whoisdyingtomakeyouracquaintance。"
"AndIforeseethataftersupperyouwillleavemetogowithhim。"
"Youmustfeelthatproprietycompelsmetodoso。"
"Yourfriendalreadyknows，Isuppose，whoIam？"
"Ithoughtitwasrighttotellhim，becauseifIhadnottoldhimhecouldnothaveentertainedthehopeofsuppingwithyou，andespeciallyatyourhouse。"
"Iunderstand。Iguessyourfriendisoneoftheforeignambassadors。"
"Precisely。"
"ButmayIhopethathewillsofarhonourmeastothrowuphisincognito？"
"Thatisunderstood。Ishallintroducehimtoyouaccordingtoacceptedforms，tellinghisnameandhispoliticalposition。"
"Thenitisallforthebest，darling。HowcouldyousupposethatI
wouldhaveanydifficultyinprocuringyouthatpleasure，whenonthecontrary，nothingcouldpleasememoremyself？Nametheday，andbequitecertainthatIshallanxiouslylookforit。"
"Ishouldhavebeensureofyourcompliance，ifyouhadnotgivenmecausetodoubtit。"
"Itisahome—thrust，butIdeserveit。"
"AndIhopeitwillnotmakeyouangry。NowIamhappy。OurfriendisM。deBernis，theFrenchambassador。Hewillcomemasked，andassoonasheshewshisfeaturesIshallpresenthimtoyou。Recollectthatyoumusttreathimasmylover，butyoumustnotappeartoknowthatheisawareofourintimacy。"
"Iunderstandthatverywell，andyoushallhaveeveryreasontobepleasedwithmyurbanity。Theideaofthatsupperisdelightfultome，andIhopethattherealitywillbeasagreeable。Youwerequiteright，mylove，todreadmybeingapatrician，forinthatcasetheState—Inquisitors，whoveryoftenthinkofnothingbutofmakingashowoftheirzeal，wouldnothavefailedtomeddlewithus，andthemereideaofthepossibleconsequencesmakesmeshudder。IunderTheLeads——youdishonoured——theabbess——theconvent！GoodGod！Yes，ifyouhadtoldmewhatyouthought，Iwouldhavegivenyoumyname，andIcouldhavedonesoallthemoreeasilythatmyreservewasonlycausedbythefearofbeingknown，andofC————C————beingtakentoanotherconventbyherfather。Butcanyouappointadayforthesupper？Ilongtohaveitallarranged。"
"To—dayisthefourth；well，then，infourdays。"
"Thatwillbetheeighth？"
"Exactlyso。Wewillgotoyourcasinoafterthesecondballet。
Givemeallnecessaryparticularstoenableustofindthehousewithoutenquiringfromanyone。"
IsatdownandIwrotedownthemostexactparticularstofindthecasinoeitherbylandorbywater。Delightedwiththeprospectofsuchapartyofpleasure，Iaskedmymistresstogotobed，butI
remarkedtoherthat，beingconvalescentandhavingmadeaheartysupper，IshouldbeverylikelytopaymyfirsthomagestoMorpheus。
Yieldingtothecircumstances，shesetthealarumforteno’clock，andwewenttobedinthealcove。Assoonaswewokeup，Loveclaimedourattentionandhehadnocauseofcomplaint，buttowardsmidnightwefellasleep，ourlipsfastenedtogether，andwefoundourselvesinthatpositioninthemorningwhenweopenedoureyes。
Althoughtherewasnotimetolose，wecouldnotmakeupourmindstopartwithoutmakingonemoreofferingtoVenus。
Iremainedinthecasinoafterthedepartureofmydivinity，andsleptuntilnoon。AssoonasIhaddressedmyself，IreturnedtoVenice，andmyfirstcarewastogivenoticetomycook，sothatthesupperofthe8thofFebruaryshouldbeworthyoftheguestsandworthyofme。
EndMEMOIRSOFJACQUESCASANOVAdeSEINGALT1725—1798
TOPARISANDPRISON，Volume2d——TheFalseNunTHERAREUNABRIDGEDLONDONEDITIONOF1894TRANSLATEDBYARTHUR
MACHENTOWHICHHASBEENADDEDTHECHAPTERSDISCOVERED
BYARTHURSYMONS。
THEFALSENUN
CHAPTERXXI
SupperatMyCasinoWithM。M。andM。deBernis，theFrenchAmbassador——AProposalfromM。M。；IAcceptIt——Consequences——
C。C。isUnfaithfultoMe，andICannotComplainIfelthighlypleasedwiththesupper—partyIhadarrangedwithM————
M————，andIoughttohavebeenhappy。YetIwasnotso；butwhencecametheanxietywhichwasatormenttome？Whence？Frommyfatalhabitofgambling。Thatpassionwasrootedinme；toliveandtoplayweretometwoidenticalthings，andasIcouldnotholdthebankIwouldgoandpuntattheridotto，whereIlostmymoneymorningandnight。Thatstateofthingsmadememiserable。Perhapssomeonewillsaytome:
"Whydidyouplay，whentherewasnoneedofit，whenyouwereinwantofnothing，whenyouhadallthemoneyyoucouldwishtosatisfyyourfancies？"
ThatwouldbeatroublesomequestionifIhadnotmadeitalawtotellthetruth。Well，then，dearinquisitivereader，ifIplayedwithalmostthecertaintyoflosing，althoughnoone，perhaps，wasmoresensiblethanIwastothelossesmadeingambling，itisbecauseIhadinmetheevilspiritofavarice；itisbecauseIlovedprodigality，andbecausemyheartbledwhenIfoundmyselfcompelledtospendanymoneythatIhadnotwonatthegaming—table。Itisanuglyvice，dearreader，Idonotdenyit。However，allIcansayisthat，duringthefourdaysprevioustothesupper，IlostallthegoldwonformebyM————M————
Ontheanxiously—expecteddayIwenttomycasino，whereattheappointedhourM————M————camewithherfriend，whomsheintroducedtomeassoonashehadtakenoffhismask。
"Ihadanardentwish，sir，"saidM。deBernistome，"torenewacquaintancewithyou，sinceIheardfrommadamethatwehadknowneachotherinParis。"
Withthesewordshelookedatmeattentively，aspeoplewilldowhentheyaretryingtorecollectapersonwhomtheyhavelostsightof。
Ithentoldhimthatwehadneverspokentooneanother，andthathehadnotseenenoughofmetorecollectmyfeaturesnow。
"Ihadthehonour，"Iadded，"todinewithyourexcellencyatM。deMocenigo’shouse，butyoutalkedallthetimewithMarshalKeith，thePrussianambassador，andIwasnotfortunateenoughtoattractyourattention。AsyouwereonthepointofleavingParistoreturntoVenice，youwentawayalmostimmediatelyafterdinner，andIhaveneverhadthehonourofseeingyousincethattime。"
"NowIrecollectyou，"heanswered，"andIrememberaskingwhetheryouwerenotthesecretaryoftheembassy。Butfromthisdayweshallnotforgeteachotheragain，forthemysterieswhichuniteusareofanaturelikelytoestablishalastingintimacybetweenus。"
Theamiablecouplewerenotlongbeforetheyfeltthoroughlyatease，andwesatdowntosupper，ofwhich，ofcourse，Ididthehonours。
Theambassador，afineconnoisseurinwines，foundmineexcellent，andwasdelightedtohearthatIhadthemfromCountAlgarotti，whowasreputedashavingthebestcellarinVenice。
Mysupperwasdelicateandabundant，andmymannerstowardsmyhandsomeguestswerethoseofaprivateindividualreceivinghissovereignandhismistress。IsawthatM————M————wascharmedwiththerespectwithwhichItreatedher，andwithmyconversation，whichevidentlyinterestedtheambassadorhighly。Theseriouscharacterofafirstmeetingdidnotpreventtheutteranceofwittyjests，forinthatrespectM。deBerniswasatrueFrenchman。Ihavetravelledmuch，Ihavedeeplystudiedmen，individuallyandinabody，butI
havenevermetwithtruesociabilityexceptinFrenchmen；theyaloneknowhowtojest，anditisrare，delicate，refinedjesting，whichanimatesconversationandmakessocietycharming。
Duringourdelightfulsupperwitwasneverwanting，andtheamiableM————M————ledtheconversationtotheromanticcombinationwhichhadgivenheroccasiontoknowme。Naturally，sheproceededtospeakofmypassionforC————C————，andshegavesuchaninterestingdescriptionofthatyounggirlthattheambassadorlistenedwithasmuchattentionasifhehadneverseentheobjectofit。Butthatwashispart，forhewasnotawarethatIhadbeeninformedofhishavingwitnessedfromhishiding—placemysillyinterviewwithC————
C————。HetoldM————M————thathewouldhavebeendelightedifshehadbroughtheryoungfriendtosupwithus。
"Thatwouldberunningtoogreatarisk，"answeredthecunningnun，"butifyouapproveofit，"sheadded，lookingatme，"Icanmakeyousupwithheratmycasino，forwesleepinthesameroom。"
Thatoffersurprisedmemuch，butitwasnotthemomenttoshewit，soIreplied:
"Itisimpossible，madam，toaddanythingtothepleasureofyoursociety，yetIconfessIshouldbepleasedifyoucouldcontrivetodousthatgreatfavour:"
"Well，Iwillthinkofit。"
"But，"observedtheambassador，"ifIamtobeoneoftheparty，I
thinkitwouldberighttoapprizetheyoungladyofit。"
"Itisnotnecessary，forIwillwritetohertoagreetowhatevermadammayproposetoher。Iwilldosoto—morrow。"
Ibeggedtheambassadortopreparehimselfwithagoodstockofindulgenceforagirloffifteenwhohadnoexperienceoftheworld。
InthecourseoftheeveningIrelatedthehistoryofO—Morphi，whichgreatlyamusedhim。Heentreatedmetolethimseeherportrait。Heinformedmethatshewasstillaninmateofthe’Parc—aux—cerfs’，whereshecontinuedtobethedelightofLouisXV。，towhomshehadgivenachild。Myguestsleftmeaftermidnight，highlypleased，andIremainedalone。
Thenextmorning，faithfultothepromiseIhadmadetomybeautifulnun，IwrotetoC————C————withoutinformingherthattherewouldbeafourthpersonattheprojectedsupper，andhavinggivenmynotetoLauraIrepairedtoMuran，whereIfoundthefollowingletterfromM————M————:
"Icouldnotsleepsoundly，mylove，ifIdidnoteasemyconscienceofanunpleasantweight。Perhapsyoudidnotapproveofthe’partiecarree’withouryoungfriend，andyoumaynothaveobjectedoutofmerepoliteness。Tellmethetruth，dearest，for，shouldyounotlookforwardtothatmeetingwithpleasure，Icancontrivetoundoitwithoutimplicatingyouinanyway；trustmeforthat。If，however，youhavenoobjectiontotheparty，itwilltakeplaceasagreed。
Believeme，Iloveyoursoulmorethanyourheart——Imeanthanyourperson。Adieu。"
Herfearwasverynatural，butoutofshamefacednessIdidnotliketoretract。M————M————knewmewell，andasaskilfultacticiansheattackedmyweakside。
Hereismyanswer:
"Iexpectedyourletter，mybestbeloved，andyoucannotdoubtit，because，asyouknowmethoroughly，youmustbeawarethatIknowyouaswell。Yes，Iknowyourmind，andIknowwhatideayoumustentertainofmine，becauseIhaveexposedtoyouallmyweaknessandirritabilitybymysophisms。Idopenanceforit，dearest，whenI
thinkthathavingraisedyoursuspicionsyourtendernessformemusthavebeenweakened。Forgetmyvisions，Ibeg，andbequitecertainthatforthefuturemysoulwillbeinunisonwithyours。Thesuppermusttakeplace，itwillbeapleasureforme，butletmeconfessthatinacceptingitIhaveshewnmyselfmoregratefulthanpolite。
C————C————isanovice，andIamnotsorrytogiveheranopportunityofseeingtheworld。Inwhatschoolcouldshelearnbetterthanyours？ThereforeIrecommendhertoyou，andyouwillpleasememuchbycontinuingtoshewyourcareandfriendshiptowardsher，andbyincreasing，ifpossible，thesumofyourgoodness。I
fearthatyoumayenticehertotaketheveil，andifshedidIwouldneverconsolemyself。Yourfriendhasquitecaptivatedme；heisasuperiorman，andtrulycharming。"
ThusdidIwittinglydeprivemyselfofthepowerofdrawingback，butIwasabletorealizethefullforceofthesituation。IhadnodifficultyinguessingthattheambassadorwasinlovewithC————
C————，andthathehadconfessedasmuchtoM————M————，who，notbeinginapositiontoobjecttoit，wascompelledtoshewherselfcompliant，andtoassisthimineverythingthatcouldrenderhispassionsuccessful。Shecouldcertainlynotdoanythingwithoutmyconsent，andshehadevidentlyconsideredtheaffairtoodelicatetoventureuponproposingthepartypoint—blanktome。Theyhad，nodoubt，puttheirheadstogether，sothatbybringingtheconversationonthatsubjectIshouldfindmyselfcompelled，forthesakeofpolitenessandperhapsofmyinwardfeelings，tofallintothesnare。
Theambassador，whoseprofessionitwastocarryonintriguesskilfully，hadsucceededwell，andIhadtakenthebaitashewished。
Therewasnothingleftformebuttoputagoodfaceonthematter，notonlysoasnottoshewmyselfaverysillybeing，butalsoinordernottoprovemyselfshamefullyungratefultowardsamanwhohadgrantedmeunheard—ofprivileges。Nevertheless，theconsequenceofitallwaslikelytobesomecoolnessinmyfeelingstowardsbothmymistresses。M————M————hadbecomeconsciousofthisaftershehadreturnedtotheconvent，andwishingtoscreenherselffromallresponsibilityshehadlostnotimeinwritingtomethatshewouldcausetheprojectedsuppertobeabandoned，incaseIshoulddisapproveofit，butsheknewverywellthatIwouldnotacceptheroffer。Self—loveisastrongerpassioneventhanjealousy；itdoesnotallowamanwhohassomepretensiontowittoshewhimselfjealous，particularlytowardsapersonwhoisnottaintedbythatbasepassion，andhasprovedit。
Thenextday，havinggoneearlytothecasino，Ifoundtheambassadoralreadythere，andhewelcomedmeinthemostfriendlymanner。Hetoldmethat，ifhehadknownmeinParishewouldhaveintroducedmeatthecourt，whereIshouldcertainlyhavemademyfortune。Now，whenIthinkofthat，Isaytomyself，"Thatmighthavebeenthecase，butofwhatgoodwouldithavebeentome？"PerhapsIshouldhavefallenavictimoftheRevolution，likesomanyothers。M。deBernishimselfwouldhavebeenoneofthosevictimsifFatehadnotallowedhimtodieinRomein1794。Hediedthereunhappy，althoughwealthy，unlesshisfeelingshadundergoneacompletechangebeforehisdeath，andIdonotbelieveit。
IaskedhimwhetherhelikedVenice，andheansweredthathecouldnotdootherwisethanlikethatcity，inwhichheenjoyedexcellenthealth，andinwhich，withplentyofmoney，lifecouldbeenjoyedbetterthananywhereelse。
"ButIdonotexpect，"headded，"tobeallowedtokeepthisembassyverylong。Bekindenoughtoletthatremainbetweenus。IdonotwishtomakeM————M—————unhappy。"
WewereconversinginallconfidencewhenM————M————arrivedwithheryoungfriend，whoshowedhersurpriseatseeinganothermanwithme，butIencouragedherbythemosttenderwelcome；andsherecoveredallhercomposurewhenshesawthedelightofthestrangeratbeingansweredbyheringoodFrench。Itgaveusbothanopportunityofpayingthewarmestcomplimentstothemistresswhohadtaughthersowell。
C————C————wastrulycharming；herlooks，brightandmodestatthesametime，seemedtosaytome，"Youmustbelongtome:"Iwishedtoseehershinebeforeourfriends；andIcontrivedtoconqueracowardlyfeelingofjealousywhich，inspiteofmyself，wasbeginningtogetholdofme。ItookcaretomakehertalkonsuchsubjectsasIknewtobefamiliartoher。Idevelopedhernaturalintelligence，andhadthesatisfactionofseeingheradmired。
Applauded，flattered，animatedbythesatisfactionshecouldreadinmyeyes，C————C————appearedaprodigytoM。deBernis，and，oh！
whatacontradictionofthehumanheart！Iwaspleased，yetI
trembledlestheshouldfallinlovewithher！Whatanenigma！I
wasintentmyselfuponaworkwhichwouldhavecausedmetomurderanymanwhodaredtoundertakeit。
Duringthesupper，whichwasworthyofaking，theambassadortreatedC————C————withthemostdelicateattentions。Wit，cheerfulness，decentmanners，attendedourdelightfulparty，anddidnotexpelthegaietyandthemerryjestswithwhichaFrenchmanknowshowtoseasoneveryconversation。
Anobservingcriticwho，withoutbeingacquaintedwithus，wishedtoguesswhetherlovewaspresentatourhappyparty，mighthavesuspected，perhaps，buthecertainlycouldnothaveaffirmed，thatitwasthere。M————M————treatedtheambassadorasafriend。Sheshewednootherfeelingtowardsmethanthatofdeepesteem，andshebehavedtoC————C————withthetenderaffectionofasister。M。deBerniswaskind，polite，andamiablewithM————M—————，butheneverceasedtotakethegreatestinterestineverywordutteredbyC————
C————，whoplayedherparttoperfection，becauseshehadonlytofollowherownnature，and，thatnaturebeingbeautiful，C————C————
couldnotfailtobemostcharming。
Wehadpassedfivedelightfulhours，andtheambassadorseemedmorepleasedeventhananyofus。M————M————hadtheairofapersonsatisfiedwithherownwork，andIwasplayingthepartofanapprovingspectator。C————C————lookedhighlypleasedathavingsecuredthegeneralapprobation，andtherewas，perhaps，aslightfeelingofvanityinherarisingfromthespecialattentionwhichtheambassadorhadbestowedonher。Shelookedatme，smiling，andI
couldeasilyunderstandthelanguageofhersoul，bywhichshewishedtotellmethatshefeltperfectlywellthedifferencebetweenthesocietyinwhichshewasthen，andthatinwhichherbrotherhadgivenussuchadisgustingspecimenofhisdepravity。
Aftermidnightitwastimetothinkofourdeparture，andM。deBernisundertookallthecomplimentarypart。ThankingM————M————
forthemostagreeablesupperhehadevermadeinhislife，hecontrivedtomakeherofferarepetitionofitfortwodaysafterwards，andheaskedme，forthesakeofappearance，whetherI
shouldnotfindasmuchdelightinthatsecondmeetingashimself。
Couldhehaveanydoubtofmyansweringaffirmatively？Ibelievenot，forIhadplacedmyselfunderthenecessityofbeingcompliant。
Allbeingagreed，wepartedcompany。
Thenextday，whenIthoughtofthatexemplarysupper，Ihadnodifficultyinguessingwhattheultimateresultwouldbe。Theambassadorowedhisgreatfortuneentirelytothefairsex，becausehepossessedtothehighestdegreetheartofcoddlinglove；andashisnaturewaseminentlyvoluptuoushefoundhisadvantageinit，becauseheknewhowtocalldesiresintoexistence，andthisprocuredhimenjoymentsworthyofhisdelicatetaste。IsawthathewasdeeplyinlovewithC————C————，andIwasfarfromsupposinghimthemantobesatisfiedwithlookingatherlovelyeyes。Hecertainlyhadsomeplanarranged，andM————M————，inspiteofallherhonesty，wastheprimemanagerofit。IknewthatshewouldcarryitonwithsuchdelicateskillthatIshouldnotseeanyevidenceofit。
AlthoughIdidnotfeeldisposedtoshewmorecompliancethanwasstrictlyjust，IforesawthatintheendIshouldbethedupe，andmypoorC————C————thevictim，ofacunningly—contrivedtrick。Icouldnotmakeupmymindeithertoconsentwithagoodgrace，ortothrowobstaclesintheway，and，believingmydearlittlewifeincapableofabandoningherselftoanythinglikelytodispleaseme，Iallowedmyselftobetakenoffmyguard，andtorelyuponthedifficultyofseducingher。Stupidcalculation！Self—loveandshamefacednesspreventedmefromusingmycommonsense。Atallevents，thatintriguekeptmeinastateoffeverbecauseIwasafraidofitsconsequences，andyetcuriositymasteredmetosuchanextentthatI
waslongingfortheresult。Iknewverywellthatasecondeditionofthesupperdidnotimplythatthesameplaywouldbeperformedasecondtime，andIforesawthatthechangeswouldbestronglymarked。
ButIthoughtmyselfboundinhonournottoretract。Icouldnotleadtheintrigue，butIbelievedmyselfsufficientlyskilfultobafflealltheirmanoeuvrings。
Afterallthoseconsiderations，however，considerationswhichenabledmetoassumethecountenanceoffalsebravery，theinexperienceofC—
———C————，who，inspiteofalltheknowledgeshehadlatelyacquired，wasonlyanovice，causedmegreatanxiety。Itwaseasytoabusehernaturalwishtobepolite，butthatfeargavewayverysoonbeforetheconfidenceIhadinM————M————sdelicacy。Ithoughtthat，havingseenhowIhadspentsixhourswiththatyounggirl，knowingforacertaintythatIintendedtomarryher，M————M————
wouldneverbeguiltyofsuchbasetreason。Allthesethoughts，worthyonlyofaweakandbashfuljealousy，broughtnoconclusivedecision。Ihadtofollowthecurrentandwatchevents。
AttheappointedtimeIrepairedtothecasino，whereIfoundmytwolovelyfriendssittingbythefire。
"Goodevening，mytwodivinities，whereisourcharmingFrenchman？"
"Hehasnotarrivedyet，"answeredM————M————，"buthewilldoubtlesssoonbehere。"
Itookoffmymask，andsittingbetweenthem，Igavethemathousandkisses，takinggoodcarenottoshewanypreference，andalthoughI
knewthattheywereawareoftheunquestionablerightIhaduponbothofthem，Ikeptwithinthelimitsoftheutmostdecency。I
congratulatedthemuponthemutualinclinationtheyfeltforeachother，andIsawthattheywerepleasednottohavetoblushonthataccount。
Morethanonehourwasspentingallantandfriendlyconversation，withoutmygivinganysatisfactiontomyburningdesires。M———M————
attractedmemorethanC————C————，butIwouldnotfortheworldhaveoffendedthecharminggirl。M————M————wasbeginningtoshewsomeanxietyabouttheabsenceofM。deBernis，whenthedoor—keeperbroughtheranotefromhim。
"Acourier，"hewrote，"whoarrivedtwohoursago，preventsmybeinghappyto—night，forIamcompelledtopassitinansweringthedispatchesIhavereceived。Itrustthatyouwillforgiveandpityme。MayIhopethatyouwillkindlygrantmeonFridaythepleasureofwhichIamsounfortunatelydeprivedto—day？Letmeknowyouranswerbyto—morrow。Iwishardently，inthatcase，tofindyouwiththesameguests，towhomIbegyouwillpresentmyaffectionatecompliments。"
"Well，"saidM————M————，"itisnothisfault。Wewillsupwithouthim。WillyoucomeonFriday？"
"Yes，withthegreatestpleasure。Butwhatisthematterwithyou，dearC————C————？Youlooksad。"
"Sad，no，unlessitshouldbeforthesakeofmyfriend，forIhaveneverseenamorepoliteandmoreobliginggentleman。"
"Verywell，dear，Iamgladhehasrenderedyousosensible。"
"Whatdoyoumean？Couldanyonebeinsensibletohismerit？"
"Betterstill，butIagreewithyou。Onlytellmeifyoulovehim？"
"Well，evenifIlovedhim，doyouthinkIwouldgoandtellhim？
Besides，Iamcertainthathelovesmyfriend。"
Sosaying，shesatdownonM————M————’sknee，callingherherownlittlewife，andmytwobeautiesbegantobestowononeanothercaresseswhichmademelaughheartily。Farfromtroublingtheirsport，Iexcitedthem，inordertoenjoyaspectaclewithwhichIhadlongbeenacquainted。
M————M————tookupabookfullofthemostlasciviousengravings，andsaid，withasignificantglanceinmydirection:
"Doyouwishmetohaveafirelightedinthealcove？"
Iunderstoodher，andreplied:
"Youwouldobligeme，forthebedbeinglargewecanallthreesleepcomfortablyinit。"
Iguessedthatshefearedmysuspectingtheambassadorofenjoyingfromthemysteriousclosetthesightofouramoroustrio，andshewishedtodestroythatsuspicionbyherproposal。
Thetablehavingbeenlaidinfrontofthealcove，supperwasserved，andwealldidhonourtoit。Wewereallblessedwithadevouringappetite。WhileM————M————wasteachingherfriendhowtomixpunch，IwasadmiringwithdelighttheprogressmadeinbeautybyC————C————。
"Yourbosom，"Isaidtoher，"musthavebecomeperfectduringthelastninemonths。"
"Itislikemine，"answeredM————M————，"wouldyouliketoseeforyourself？"
OfcourseIdidnotrefuse。M————M————unlacedherfriend，whomadenoresistance，andperformingafterwardsthesameofficeuponherself，inlessthantwominutesIwasadmiringfourrivalscontendingforthegoldenapplelikethethreegoddesses，andwhichwouldhavesetatdefiancethehandsomeParishimselftoadjudgetheprizewithoutinjustice。NeedIsaywhatanardentfirethatravishingsightsentcoursingthroughmyveins？IplacedimmediatelyanthetabletheAcademiedesDames，andpointedoutacertainpositiontoM————M————，who，understandingmywishes，saidtoC————
C————:
"Willyou，darling，representthatgroupwithme？"
AlookofcompliancewasC————C————’sonlyanswer；shewasnotyetinuredtoamorouspleasuresasmuchasherlovelyteacher。WhileI
waslaughingwithdelight，thetwofriendsweregettingready，andinafewminuteswewereallthreeinbed，andinastateofnature。Atfirst，satisfiedwithenjoyingthesightofthebarrencontestofmytwobacchanalians，Iwasamusedbytheireffortsandbythecontrastofcolours，foronewasdarkandtheotherfair，butsoon，excitedmyself，andconsumedbyallthefireofvoluptuousness，Ithrewmyselfuponthem，andImadethem，oneaftertheother，almostfaintawayfromtheexcessofloveandenjoyment。
Wornoutandsatiatedwithpleasure，Iinvitedthemtotakesomerest。Wesleptuntilwewereawakenedbythealarum，whichIhadtakencaretosetatfouro’clock。Wewerecertainofturningtogoodaccountthetwohourswehadthentosparebeforepartingcompany，whichwedidatthedawnofday，humiliatedathavingtoconfessourexhaustion，buthighlypleasedwitheachother，andlongingforarenewalofourdelightfulpleasures。
Thenextday，however，whenIcametothinkofthatrathertoolivelynight，duringwhich，asisgenerallythecase，LovehadroutedReason，Ifeltsomeremorse。M————M————wantedtoconvincemeofherlove，andforthatpurposeshehadcombinedallthevirtueswhichIattachedtomyownaffection——namely，honour，delicacy，andtruth，buthertemperament，ofwhichhermindwastheslave，carriedhertowardsexcess，andshepreparedeverythinginordertogivewaytoit，whilesheawaitedtheopportunityofmakingmeheraccomplice。
Shewascoaxinglovetomakeitcompliant，andtosucceedinmasteringit，becauseherheart，enslavedbyhersenses，neverreproachedher。ShelikewisetriedtodeceiveherselfbyendeavouringtoforgetthatImightcomplainofhavingbeensurprised。SheknewthattouttersuchacomplaintIwouldhavetoacknowledgemyselfweakerorlesscourageousthanshewas，andsherelieduponmybeingashamedtomakesuchaconfession。Ihadnodoubtwhateverthattheabsenceoftheambassadorhadbeenarrangedandconcertedbeforehand。Icouldseestillfurther，foritseemedevidenttomethatthetwoconspiratorshadforeseenthatIwouldguesstheartifice，andthat，feelingstungtothequick，inspiteofallmyregrets，Iwouldnotshewmyselflessgenerousthantheyhadbeenthemselves。Theambassadorhavingfirstprocuredmeadelightfulnight，howcouldIrefusetolethimenjoyaspleasantaone？Myfriendshadarguedverywell，for，inspiteofalltheobjectionsofmymind，IsawthatIcouldnotonmysideputanyobstacleintheirway。C————C————wasnoimpedimenttothem。Theywerecertainofconqueringherthemomentshewasnothinderedbymypresence。ItrestedentirelywithM————M————，whohadperfectcontroloverher。Poorgirl！Isawheronthehighroadtodebauchery，anditwasmyowndoing！IsighedwhenIthoughthowlittleIhadsparedtheminourlastorgie，andwhatwouldbecomeofmeifbothofthemshouldhappentobe，bymydoing，insuchapositionastobecompelledtorunawayfromtheconvent？Icouldimaginebothofthemthrownuponmyhands，andtheprospectwasnotparticularlyagreeable。Itwouldbean’embarrasderichesse’。Inthismiserablecontestbetweenreasonandprejudice，betweennatureandsentiment，Icouldnotmakeupmymindeithertogotothesupperortoremainabsentfromit。"IfIgo，"saidItomyself，"thatnightwillpasswithperfectdecency，butIshallprovemyselfveryridiculous，jealous，ungrateful，andevenwantingincommonpoliteness:ifIremainabsent，C————C————islost，atleast，inmyestimation，forIfeelthatmylovewillnolongerexist，andthengood—byetoallideaofamarriagewithher。"IntheperplexityofmindinwhichIfoundmyself，Ifeltawantofsomethingmorecertainthanmereprobabilitiestobasemydecisionupon。Iputonmymask，andrepairedtothemansionoftheFrenchambassador。Iaddressedmyselftothegate—keeper，sayingthatIhadaletterforVersailles，andthatIwouldthankhimtodeliverittothecourierwhenhewentbacktoFrancewithhisexcellency’sdispatches。
"But，sir，"answeredtheman，"wehavenothadaspecialcourierforthelasttwomonths:"
"What？Didnotaspecialcabinetmessengerarriveherelastnight？"
"Thenhemusthavecomeinthroughthegarretwindowordownthechimney，for，onthewordofanhonestman，noneenteredthroughthegate。"
"Buttheambassadorworkedallnight？"
"Thatmaybe，sir，butnothere，forhisexcellencydinedwiththeSpanishambassador，anddidnotreturntillverylate:"
Ihadguessedrightly。Icouldnolongerentertainanydoubt。Itwasallover；Icouldnotdrawbackwithoutshame。C————C————mustresist，ifthegamewasdistastefultoher；noviolencewouldofcoursebeofferedtoher。Thediewascast！
TowardseveningIwenttothecasinoofMuran，andwroteashortnotetoM————M————，requestinghertoexcusemeifsomeimportantbusinessofM。deBragadin’spreventedmefromspendingthenightwithherandwithourtwofriends，towhomIsentmycomplimentsaswellasmyapologies。AfterthatIreturnedtoVenice，butinratheranunpleasantmood；todivertmyselfIwenttothegamingtable，andlostallnight。
Twodaysafterwards，beingcertainthataletterfromM————M————
awaitedmeatMuran，Iwentover，andthedoor—keeperhandedmeaparcelinwhichIfoundanotefrommynunandaletterfromC————
C————，foreverythingwasnowincommonbetweenthem。
HereisC————C————’sletter"
"Wewereverysorry，dearestfriend，whenweheardthatweshouldnothavethehappinessofseeingyou。MydearM————M————’sfriendcameshortlyafterwards，andwhenhereadyournotehelikewiseexpressedhisdeepregret。Weexpectedtohaveaverydullsupper，butthewittysayingsofthatgentlemanenlivenedusandyoucannotimagineofwhatfollieswewereguiltyafterpartakingofsomechampagnepunch。Ourfriendhadbecomeasgayasourselves，andwespentthenightintrios，notveryfatiguing，butverypleasant。Icanassureyouthatthatmandeservestobeloved，buthemustacknowledgehimselfinferiortoyouineverything。Believeme，dearest，Ishalleverloveyou，andyoumustforeverremainthemasterofmyheart。"
Inspiteofallmyvexation，thatlettermademelaugh，butthenoteofM————M————wasmuchmoresingular。Herearethecontentsofit:
"Iamcertain，myownbeloved，thatyoutoldastoryoutofpurepoliteness，butyouhadguessedthatIexpectedyoutodoso。YouhavemadeourfriendasplendidpresentinexchangefortheonehemadeyouwhenhedidnotobjecttohisM————M————bestowingherheartuponyou。Youpossessthatheartentirely，dearest，andyouwouldpossessitunderallcircumstances，buthowsweetitistoflavourthepleasuresoflovewiththecharmsoffriendship！Iwassorrynottoseeyou，butIknewthatifyouhadcomewewouldnothavehadmuchenjoyment；forourfriend，notwithstandingallhiswit，isnotexemptfromsomenaturalprejudices。AsforC————C—————，hermindisnowquiteasfreeofthemasourown，andIamgladsheowesittome。Youmustfeelthankfultomeforhavingcompletedhereducation，andforrenderingherineverywayworthyofyou。Iwishyouhadbeenhidinginthecloset，whereIamcertainyouwouldhavespentsomedelightfulhours。OnWednesdaynextIshallbeyours，andallalonewithyouinyourcasinoinVenice；letmeknowwhetheryouwillbeattheusualhournearthestatueoftheheroColleoni。Incaseyoushouldbeprevented，nameanyotherday。"
Ihadtoanswerthosetwolettersinthesamespiritinwhichtheyhadbeenwritten，andinspiteofallthebitterfeelingswhichwerethenraginginmyheart，myanswersweretobeassweetashoney。I
wasinneedofgreatcourage，butIsaidtomyself:"GeorgeDandin，tulasvoulu！"Icouldnotrefusetopaythepenaltyofmyowndeeds，andIhaveneverbeenabletoascertainwhethertheshameI
feltwaswhatiscalledshamefacedness。ItisaproblemwhichI
leavetoothers。
InmylettertoC————C————Ihadthecourage，ortheeffrontery，tocongratulateher，andtoencouragehertoimitateM————M————，thebestmodel，Isaid，Icouldproposetoher。
IwrotetomynunthatIwouldbepunctualattheappointmentnearthestatue，andamidstmanyfalsecompliments，whichoughttohavebetrayedthetruestateofmyheart，ItoldherthatIadmiredtheperfecteducationshehadgiventoC————C—————，butthatI
congratulatedmyselfuponhavingescapedthetortureIshouldhavesufferedinthemysteriousobservatory，forIfeltthatIcouldnothaveborneit。
OntheWednesdayIwaspunctualattherendezvous，andIhadnottowaitlongforM————M————，whocamedisguisedinmaleattire。"Notheatreto—night，"shesaidtome；"letusgotothe’ridotto’，toloseordoubleourmoney。"Shehadsixhundredsequins。Ihadaboutonehundred。Fortuneturnedherbackuponus，andwelosta11。I
expectedthatwewouldthenleavethatcutthroatplace，butM————
M————，havingleftmeforaminute，camebackwiththreehundredsequinswhichhadbeengiventoherbyherfriend，whomsheknewwheretofind。Thatmoneygivenbyloveorbyfriendshipbroughtherluckforashorttime，andshesoonwonbackallwehadlost，butinourgreedinessorimprudencewecontinuedtoplay，andfinallywelostourlastsequin。
Whenwecouldplaynolonger，M————M————saidtome，"Nowthatweneednotfearthieves，letusgotooursupper。"
Thatwoman，religiousandaFree—thinker，alibertineandgambler，waswonderfulinallshedid。Shehadjustlostfivehundredpounds，andshewasascompletelyathereaseasifshehadwonaverylargesum。Itistruethatthemoneyshehadjustlosthadnotcosthermuch。
Assoonaswewerealone，shefoundmesadandlow—spirited，althoughItriedhardnottoappearso，but，asforher，alwaysthesame，shewashandsome，brilliant，cheerful，andamorous。
ShethoughtshewouldbringbackmyspiritsbygivingmethefullestparticularsofthenightshehadpassedwithC————C————andherfriend，butsheoughttohaveguessedthatshewasgoingthewrongway。Thatisaverycommonerror，itcomesfromthemind，becausepeopleimaginethatwhattheyfeelthemselvesothersmustfeellikewise。
Iwasonthorns，andItriedeverythingtoavoidthatsubject，andtoleadtheconversationintoadifferentchannel，fortheamorousparticulars，onwhichshewasdwellingwithapparentdelight，vexedmegreatly，andspitecausingcoldness，Iwasafraidofnotplayingmypartverywarmlyintheamorouscontestwhichwasathand。Whenaloverdoubtshisownstrength，hemayalmostalwaysbesurethathewillfailinhisefforts。
Aftersupperwewenttobedinthealcove，wherethebeauty，thementalandphysicalcharms，thegraceandtheardourofmylovelynun，castallmybadtempertothewinds，andsoonrestoredmetomyusualgood—spirits。Thenightsbeingshorterwespenttwohoursinthemostdelightfulpleasures，andthenparted，satisfiedandfulloflove。
Beforeleaving，M————M————askedmetogotohercasino，totakesomemoneyandtoplay，takingherformypartner。Ididso。ItookallthegoldIfound，andplayingthemartingale，anddoublingmystakescontinuously，Iwoneverydayduringtheremainderofthecarnival。Iwasfortunateenoughnevertolosethesixthcard，and，ifIhadlostit，Ishouldhavebeenwithoutmoneytoplay，forIhadtwothousandsequinsonthatcard。Icongratulatedmyselfuponhavingincreasedthetreasureofmydearmistress，whowrotetomethat，forthesakeofcivility，weoughttohaveasupper’enpartiecarree’onShroveMonday。Iconsented。
ThatsupperwasthelastIeverhadinmylifewithC————C————。Shewasinexcellentspirits，butIhadmadeupmymind，andasIpaidallmyattentionstoM————M————，C————C————imitatedmyexamplewithoutdifficulty，andshedevotedherselfwhollytohernewlover。
Foreseeingthatwewould，alittlelater，beallofusineachother’sway，IbeggedM————M————toarrangeeverythingsothatwecouldbeapart，andshecontriveditmarvellouslywell。
Aftersupper，theambassadorproposedagameoffaro，whichourbeautiesdidnotknow；hecalledforcards，andplacedonehundredLouisonthetablebeforehim；hedealt，andtookcaretomakeC————
C————winthewholeofthatsum。Itwasthebestwaytomakeheracceptitaspin—money。Theyounggirl，dazzledbysomuchgold，andnotknowingwhattodowithit，askedherfriendtotakecareofitforheruntilsuchtimeassheshouldleavetheconventtogetmarried。
Whenthegamewasover，M————M————complainedofaheadache，andsaidthatshewouldgotobedinthealcove:sheaskedmetocomeandlullhertosleep。Wethusleftthenewloversfreetobeasgayastheychose。Sixhoursafterwards，whenthealarumwarnedusthatitwastimetopart，wefoundthemasleepineachother’sembrace。I
hadmyselfpassedanamorousandquietnight，pleasedwithM————
M————，andwithoutgivingonethoughttoC————C————。
CHAPTERXXII
M。DeBernisGoesAwayLeavingMetheUseofHisCasino——HisGoodAdvice:HowIFollowIt——PerilofM。M。andMyself——Mr。Murray，theEnglishAmbassador——SaleoftheCasinoandEndofOurMeetings——
SeriousIllnessofM。M。——ZorziandCondulmer——TonnieThoughtheinfidelitiesofC————C————mademelookatherwithothereyesthanbefore，andIhadnownointentionofmakingherthecompanionofmylife，Icouldnothelpfeelingthatithadrestedwithmetostopheronthebrinkofthestream，andIthereforeconsidereditmydutyalwaystobeherfriend。
IfIhadbeenmorelogical，theresolutionItookwithrespecttoherwoulddoubtlesshavebeenofanotherkind。Ishouldhavesaidtomyself:Afterseducingher，Imyselfhavesettheexampleofinfidelity；Ihavebiddenhertofollowblindlytheadviceofherfriend，althoughIknewthattheadviceandtheexampleofM———M————
wouldendinherruin；Ihadinsulted，inthemostgrievousmanner，thedelicacyofmymistress，andthatbeforeherveryeyes，andafterallthishowcouldIaskaweakwomantodowhataman，pridinghimselfonhisstrength，wouldshrinkfromattempting？Ishouldhavestoodself—condemned，andhavefeltthatitwasmydutytoremainthesametoher，butflatteringmyselfthatIwasovercomingmereprejudices，Iwasinfactthatmostdegradedofslaves，hewhouseshisstrengthtocrushtheweak。
ThedayafterShroveTuesday，goingtothecasinoofMuran，IfoundtherealetterfromM————M————，whogavemetwopiecesofbadnews:
thatC————C————hadlosthermother，andthatthepoorgirlwasindespair；andthatthelay—sister，whoserheumwascured，hadreturnedtotakeherplace。ThusC————C————wasdeprivedofherfriendatatimewhenshewouldhavegivenherconsolation，ofwhichshestoodingreatneed。C————C————，itseemed，hadgonetosharetheroomsofheraunt，who，beingveryfondofher，hadobtainedpermissionfromthesuperior。Thiscircumstancewouldpreventtheambassadortakinganymoresupperswithher，andIshouldhavebeendelightedifchancehadputthisobstacleinhispathafewdayssooner。
AllthesemisfortunesseemedofsmallaccountcomparedwithwhatI
wasafraidof，forC————C————mighthavetopaythepriceforherpleasures，andIsofarregardedmyselfastheoriginofherunhappinessastofeelboundnevertoabandonher，andthismighthaveinvolvedmeinterriblecomplications。
M————M————askedmetosupwithherandherloveronthefollowingMonday。Iwentandfoundthembothsad——heforthelossofhisnewmistress，andshebecauseshehadnolongerafriendtomaketheseclusionoftheconventpleasant。
AboutmidnightM。deBemisleftus，sayinginamelancholymannerthathefearedheshouldbeobligedtopassseveralmonthsinViennaonimportantdiplomaticbusiness。BeforepartingweagreedtosuptogethereveryFriday。
WhenwewerealoneM————M————toldmethattheambassadorwouldbeobligedtomeifinthefutureIwouldcometothecasinotwohourslater。Iunderstoodthatthegood—naturedandwittyprofligatehadaverynaturalprejudiceagainstindulginghisamorousfeelingsexceptwhenhewascertainofbeingalone。
M。deBemiscametoalloursupperstillheleftforVienna，andalwayswentawayatmidnight。Henolongermadeuseofhishiding—
place，partlybecausewenowonlylayintherecess，andpartlybecause，havinghadtimetomakelovebeforemyarrival，hisdesireswereappeased。M————M————alwaysfoundmeamorous。Mylove，indeed，wasevenhotterthanithadbeen，since，onlyseeingheronceaweekandremainingfaithfultoher，Ihadalwaysanabundantharvesttogatherin。C————C————’sletterswhichshebroughttomesoftenedmetotears，forshesaidthatafterthelossofhermothershecouldnotcountuponthefriendshipofanyofherrelations。Shecalledmehersolefriend，heronlyprotector，andinspeakingofhergriefinnotbeingabletoseemeanymorewhilstsheremainedintheconvent，shebeggedmetoremainfaithfultoherdearfriend。
OnGoodFriday，whenIgottothecasino，Ifoundtheloversover—
whelmedwithgrief。Supperwasserved，buttheambassador，downcastandabsent，neitheratenorspoke；andM————M————waslikeastatuethatmovesatintervalsbysomemechanism。Goodsenseandordinarypolitenesspreventedmefromaskinganyquestions，butonM————M————
leavingustogether，M。deBemistoldmethatshewasdistressed，andwithreason，sincehewasobligedtosetoutforViennafifteendaysafterEaster。"Imaytellyouconfidentially，"headded，"thatIbelieveIshallscarcelybeabletoreturn，butshemustnotbetold，asshewouldbeindespair。"M————M————camebackinafewminutes，butitwaseasytoseethatshehadbeenweeping。
Aftersomecommonplaceconversation，M。deBernis，seeingM————M————
stilllow—spirited，said，"Donotgrievethus，sweetheart，goImust，butmyreturnisamatterofequalcertaintywhenIhavefinishedtheimportantbusinesswhichsummonsmetoVienna。Youwillstillhavethecasino，but，dearest，bothfriendshipandprudencemakemeadviseyounottocomehereinmyabsence，forafterIhaveleftVeniceIcannotdependuponthefaithofthegondoliersinmyservice，andIsuspectourfriendherecannotflatterhimselfonhisabilitytogetreliableones。ImayalsotellyouthatIhavestrongreasonsforsuspectingthatourintercourseisknowntotheStateInquisitors，whoconcealtheirknowledgeforpoliticalreasons，butIfancythesecretwouldsooncometolightwhenIamnolongerhere，andwhenthenunwhoconnivesatyourdeparturefromtheconventknowsthatitisnolongerformethatyouleaveit。TheonlypeoplewhomIwouldtrustarethehousekeeperandhiswife。Ishallorderthem，beforeIgo，tolookuponourfriendhereasmyself，andyoucanmakeyourarrangementswiththem。Itrustallwillgowelltillmyreturn，ifyouwillonlybehavediscreetly。Iwillwritetoyouundercoverofthehousekeeper，hiswifewillgiveyoumylettersasbefore，andinthesamewayyoumayreply。Imustneedsgo，dearestone，butmyheartiswithyou，andIleaveyou，tillmyreturn，inthehandsofafriend，whomIrejoicetohaveknown。Helovesyou，hehasaheartandknowledgeoftheworld，andhewillnotletyoumakeanymistakes。"
M————M————wassoaffectedbywhattheambassadorhadsaidthatsheentreatedustolethergo，asshewishedtobealoneandtoliedown。AsshewentweagreedtosuptogetheronthefollowingThursday。
Assoonaswewerealonetheambassadorimpressedmewiththeabsolutenecessityofconcealingfromherthathewasgoingtoreturnnomore。"Iamgoing，"saidhe，"toworkinconcertwiththeAustriancabinetonatreatywhichwillbethetalkofEurope。I
entreatyoutowritetomeunreservedly，andasafriend，andifyouloveourcommonmistress，haveacareforherhonour，andaboveallhavethestrengthofmindtoresistallprojectswhicharecertaintoinvolveyouinmisfortune，andwhichwillbeequallyfataltoboth。
YouknowwhathappenedtoMadamedeRiva，anunintheconventofSt。————。Shehadtodisappearafteritbecameknownthatshewaswithchild，andM。deFrulai，mypredecessor，wentmad，anddiedshortlyafter。J。J。Rousseautoldmethathediedofpoison，butheisavisionarywhoseestheblacksideofeverything。Formypart，I
believethathediedofgriefatnotbeingabletodoanythingfortheunfortunatewoman，whoafterwardsprocuredadispensationfromhervowsfromthePope，andhavinggotmarriedisnowlivingatPaduawithoutanypositioninsociety。
"Lettheprudentandloyalfriendmasterthelover:goandseeM————
M————sometimesintheparlouroftheconvent，butnothere，ortheboatmenwillbetrayyou。Theknowledgewhichwebothhavethatthegirlsareinasatisfactoryconditionisagreatalleviationtomydistress，butyoumustconfessthatyouhavebeenveryimprudent。
Youhaveriskedaterriblemisfortune；considerthepositionyouwouldhavebeenin，forIamsureyouwouldnothaveabandonedher。
ShehadanideathatthedangermightbeovercomebymeansofdrugsbutIconvincedherthatshewasmistaken。"InGod’sname，bediscreetinthefuture，andwritetomefully，forIshallalwaysbeinterestedinherfate，bothfromdutyandsentiment。"
WereturnedtogethertoVenice，whereweseparated，andIpassedtherestofthenightingreatdistress。InthemorningIwrotetothefairafflicted，andwhilstendeavouringtoconsolehertothebestofmyability，Itriedtoimpressonherthenecessityforprudenceandtheavoidanceofsuchescapadesasmighteventuallyruinus。
NextdayIreceivedherreply，everywordofwhichspeltdespair。
Naturehadgivenheradispositionwhichhadbecomesointensifiedbyindulgencethatthecloisterwasunbearabletoher，andIforesawthehardfightsIshouldhavetoundergo。
WesaweachothertheThursdayafterEaster，andItoldherthatI
shouldnotcometothecasinobeforemidnight。Shehadhadfourhourstopasswithherloverintearsandregrets，amongstwhichshehadoftencursedhercruelfateandthefoolishresolutionwhichmadehertaketheveil。Wesuppedtogether，andalthoughthemealwasarichanddelicateonewediditlittlehonour。Whenwehadfinished，theambassadorleft，entreatingmetoremain，whichIdid，withoutthinkingatallofthepleasuresofapartyoftwo，forLovelightethnothistorchattheheartsoftwoloverswhoarefullofgriefandsorrow。M————M————hadgrownthin，andherconditionexcitedmypityandshutoutallotherfeelings。Iheldheralongtimeinmyarms，coveringherwithtenderandaffectionatekisses，butIshewednointentionofconsolingherbyamusementsinwhichherspiritcouldnothavetakenpart。Shesaid，beforeweparted，thatIhadshewnmyselfatruelover，andsheaskedmetoconsidermyselffromhenceforthasheronlyfriendandprotector。
Nextweek，whenweweretogetherasusual，M。deBemiscalledthehousekeeperjustbeforesupper，andinhispresenceexecutedadeedinmybehalf，whichhemadehimsign。Inthisdocumenthetransferredtomeallrightsoverthecontentsofthecasino，andchargedhimtoconsidermeinallthingsashismaster。
Wearrangedtosuptogethertwodaysafter，tomakeourfarewells，butonmyarrivalIfoundbyherself，standingup，andpaleasdeath，orratheraswhiteasastatueofCarraramarble。
"Heisgone，"shesaid，"andheleavesmetoyourcare。Fatalbeing，whomperchanceIshallseenomore，whomIthoughtIlovedbutasafriend，nowyouarelosttomeIseemymistake。BeforeIknewhimI
wasnothappy，butneitherwasIunhappyasInowam。"
Ipassedthewholenightbesideher，strivingbythemostdelicateattentionstosoftenhergrief，butwithoutsuccess。Hercharacter，asabandonedtosorrowastopleasure，wasdisplayedtomeduringthatlongandwearynight。ShetoldmeatwhathourIshouldcometotheconventparlour，thenextday，andonmyarrivalIwasdelightedtofindhernotquitesosad。SheshewedmealetterwhichherloverhadwrittentoherfromTrevisa，andshethentoldmethatImustcomeandseehertwiceaweek，warningmethatshewouldbeaccompaniedsometimesbyonenunandsometimesbyanother，forsheforesawthatmyvisitswouldbecomethetalkoftheconvent，whenitbecameknownthatIwastheindividualwhousedtogotomassattheirchurch。Shethereforetoldmetogiveinanothername，topreventC————C————’sauntfrombecomingsuspicious。
"Nevertheless，"sheadded，"thiswillnotpreventmycomingalonewhenInaveanymatterofimportancetocommunicatetoyou。Promiseme，sweetheart，tosupandsleepatthecasinoatleastonceaweek，andwritemeanoteeachtimebythehousekeeper’swife。"
Imadenodifficultyinpromisingherthatmuch。
Wethuspassedafortnightquietlyenough，asshewashappyagain，andheramorousinclinationshadreturnedinfullforce。Aboutthistimeshegavemeapieceofnewswhichdelightedme——namely，thatC————C————hadnolongeranythingtofear。
Fullofamorouswishesandhavingtobecontentwiththeteasingpleasureofseeingoneanotherthroughawretchedgrating，werackedourbrainstofindoutsomewaytobealonetogethertodowhatweliked，withoutanyrisk。
"Iamassured，"shesaid，"ofthegoodfaithofthegardener’ssister。Icangooutandcomeinwithoutfearofbeingseen，forthelittledoorleadingtotheconventisnotoverlookedbyanywindow——
indeeditisthoughttobewalledup。Nobodycanseemecrossingthegardentothelittlestream，whichisconsideredunnavigable。Allwewantisaone—oaredgondola，andIcannotbelievethatwiththehelpofmoneyyouwillbeunabletofindaboatmanonwhomwemayrely。"
Iunderstoodfromtheseexpressionsthatshesuspectedmeofbecomingcoldtowardsher，andthissuspicionpiercedmetotheheart。
"Listen，"saidI，"Iwillbetheboatmanmyself。Iwillcometothequay，passbythelittledoor，andyoushallleadmetoyourroomwhereIwillpassthewholenightwithyou，andtheday，too，ifyouthinkyoucanhideme。"
"Thatplan，"saidshe，"makesmeshudder。Itrembleatthedangertowhichyoumightbeexposed。No，IshouldbetoounfortunateifI
weretobethecauseofyourmisfortune，but，asyoucanrow，comeintheboat，letmeknowthetimeascloselyaspossible；thetrustywomanwillbeonthewatch，andIwillnotkeepyoufourminuteswaiting。Iwillgetintotheboat，wewillgotoourbelovedcasino，andthenweshallbehappywithoutfearinganything。"
"Iwillthinkitover"
ThewayItooktosatisfyherwasasfollows:Iboughtasmallboat，andwithouttellingherIwentonenightallbymyselfroundtheislandtoinspectthewallsoftheconventonthesideofthelagune。
WithsomedifficultyImadeoutalittledoor，whichIjudgedtobetheonlyonebywhichshecouldpass，buttogofromtheretothecasinowasnosmallmatter，sinceonewasobligedtofetchawidecourse，andwithoneoarIcouldnotdothepassageinlessthanaquarterofanhour，andthatwithmuchtoil。Nevertheless，feelingsureofsuccess，Itoldmyprettynunoftheplan，andneverwasnewsreceivedwithsomuchpleasure。Wesetourwatchestogether，andfixedourmeetingfortheFridayfollowing。
Onthedayappointed，anhourbeforesunset，IbetookmyselftoSt。
FrancisdelaVigne，whereIkeptmyboat，andhavingsetitinorderanddressedmyselfasaboatman，Igotuponthepoopandheldastraightcourseforthelittledoor，whichopenedthemomentI
arrived。M————M————cameoutwrappedinacloak，andsomeoneshuttingthedoorafterhershegotonboardmyfrailbark，andinaquarterofanhourwewereatthecasino。M————M————madehastetogoin，butIstayedtobelaymyboatwithalockandchainagainstthieves，whopassthenightpleasantlybystealingwhatevertheycanlayhandson。
ThoughIhadrowedeasilyenough，Iwasinabathofperspiration，which，however，bynomeanshinderedmycharmingmistressfromfallingonmyneck；thepleasureofmeetingseemedtochallengeherlove，and，proudofwhatIhaddone，Ienjoyedhertransports。
NotdreamingthatIshouldhaveanyoccasionforachangeoflinen，I
hadbroughtnonewithme，butshesoonfoundacureforthisdefect；
forafterhavingundressedmeshedriedmelovingly，gavemeoneofhersmocks，andIfoundmyselfdressedtoadmiration。
Wehadbeentoolongdeprivedofouramorouspleasurestothinkoftakingsupperbeforewehadofferedaplenteoussacrificetolove。
Wespenttwohoursinthesweetestofintoxications，ourblissseemingmoreacutethanatourfirstmeeting。Inspiteofthefirewhichconsumedme，inspiteoftheardourofmymistress，Iwassufficientlymasterofmyselftodisappointheratthecriticalmoment，forthepicturewhichourfriendhaddrawnwasalwaysbeforemyeyes。M————M————，joyousandwanton，havingmeforthefirsttimeinthecharacterofboatman，augmentedourdelightsbyheramorouscaprices，butitwasuselessforhertotrytoaddfueltomyflame，sinceIlovedherbetterthanmyself。
Thenightwasshort，forshewasobligedtoreturnatthreeinthemorning，anditstruckoneaswesatdowntotable。Astheclimaxofillluckastormcameonwhilstwewereatsupper。Ourhairstoodonend；ouronlyhopewasfoundedinthenatureofthesesqualls，whichseldomlastmorethananhour。Wewereinhopes，also，thatitwouldnotleavebehindittoostrongawind，asissometimesthecase，forthoughIwasstrongandsturdyIwasfarfromhavingtheskillorexperienceofaprofessionalboatman。
Inlessthanhalfanhourthestormbecameviolent，oneflashoflightningfollowedanother，thethunderroared，andthewindgrewtoagale。Yetafteraheavyrain，inlessthananhour，theskycleared，buttherewasnomoon，itbeingthedayaftertheAscension。
Twoo’clockstuck。Iputmyheadoutatthewindow，butperceivethatacontrarygaleisblowing。
’MatirannodelmarLibecchioresta。’
ThisLibecchiowhichAriostocalls——andwithgoodreason——thetyrantofthesea，isthesouthwesterlywind，whichiscommonlycalled’Garbin’atVenice。Isaidnothing，butIwasfrightened。Itoldmysweetheartthatwemustneedssacrificeanhourofpleasure，sinceprudencewouldhaveitso。
"Letussetoutforthwith，forifthegalegetsstrongerIshallnotbeabletodoubletheisland。"
Shesawmyadvicewasnottobequestioned，andtakingthekeyofherstrongbox，whenceshedesiredtogetsomemoney，shewasdelightedtofindherstoreincreasedfourfold。Shethankedmeforhavingtoldhernothingaboutit，assuringmeshewouldhaveofmenothingbutmyheart，andfollowingmeshegotintomyboatandlaydownatfulllengthsoasnottohinderitsmotion，Igotuponthepoop，asfulloffearascourage，andinfiveminutesIhadthegoodlucktodoublethepoint。Butthereitwasthatthetyrantwaswaitingforme，anditwasnotlongbeforeIfeltthatmystrengthwouldnotoutlastthatofthewinds。Irowedwithallmystrength，butallIcoulddowastopreventmyboatfromgoingback。ForhalfanhourIwasinthispitifulstate，andIfeltmystrengthfailingwithoutdaringtosayaword。Iwasoutofbreath，butcouldnotrestamoment，sincetheleastrelaxationwouldhavelettheboatslipafarwayback，andthiswouldhavebeenadistancehardtorecover。M————M————laystillandsilent，forsheperceivedIhadnobreathwherewithtoanswerher。Ibegantogiveourselvesupaslost。
AtthatinstantIsawinthedistanceabarquecomingswiftlytowardsus。Whatapieceofluck！Iwaitedtillshecaughtusup，forifI
hadnotdonesoIshouldnothavebeenabletomakemyselfheard，butassoonasIsawheratmylefthand，twelvefeetoff，Ishouted，"Help！Iwillgivetwosequins！"
Theyloweredsailandcametowardsme，andontheirhailingmeI
askedforamantotakeustotheoppositepointoftheisland。Theyaskedasequininadvance，Igaveitthem，andpromisedtheothertothemanwhowouldgetonmypoopandhelpmetomakethepoint。Inlessthantenminuteswewereoppositetothelittlestreamleadingtotheconvent，butthesecretofitwastoodeartobehazarded，soassoonaswereachedthepointIpaidmypreserverandsenthimback。Henceforththewindwasinourfavour，andwesoongottothelittledoor，whereM————M————landed，sayingtome，"Goandsleepinthecasino。"Ithoughtheradvicewise，andIfollowedit，andhavingthewindbehindmeIgottothecasinowithouttrouble，andslepttillbroadday。AssoonasIhadrisenIwrotetomydearmistressthatIwaswell，andthatweshouldseeeachotheratthegrating。HavingtakenmyboatbacktoSt。Francis，IputonmymaskandwenttoListon。
InthemorningM————M————cametothegratingbyherself，andwemadeallsuchobservationsasouradventuresofthenightwouldbelikelytosuggest，butinplaceofdecidingtofollowtheadvicewhichprudenceshouldhavegivenus—namely，nottoexposeourselvestodangerforthefuture，wethoughtourselvesextremelyprudentinresolvingthatifwewereagainthreatenedbyastormwewouldsetoutassoonaswesawitrising。Allthesamewehadtoconfessthatifchancehadnotthrownthebarqueinourwayweshouldhavebeenobligedtoreturntothecasino，forM————M————couldnothavegottotheconvent，andhowcouldsheeverhaveentereditswallsagain？
IshouldhavebeenforcedtoleaveVenicewithher，andthatforever。Mylifewouldhavebeenfinallyandirretrievablylinkedwithhers，and，withoutdoubt，thevariousadventureswhichattheageofseventy—twoyearsimpelmetowritetheseMemoirs，wouldneverhavetakenplace。
Forthenextthreemonthswecontinuedtomeeteachotheronceaweek，alwaysamorous，andneverdisturbedbytheslightestaccidents。