AlthoughIwaslookingatBiddyasIspoke,andalthoughsheopenedhereyesverywidewhenIhadspoken,shedidnotlookatme。
`Oh,hismanners!won'thismannersdo,then?'askedBiddy,pluckingablack-currantleaf。
`MydearBiddy,theydoverywellhere——'
`Oh!theydoverywellhere?'interruptedBiddy,lookingcloselyattheleafinherhand。
`Hearmeout-butifIweretoremoveJoeintoahighersphere,asIshallhopetoremovehimwhenIfullycomeintomyproperty,theywouldhardlydohimjustice。'
`Anddon'tyouthinkheknowsthat?'askedBiddy。
Itwassuchaveryprovokingquestionforithadneverinthemostdistantmanneroccurredtome,thatIsaid,snappishly,`Biddy,whatdoyoumean?'
Biddyhavingrubbedtheleaftopiecesbetweenherhands-andthesmellofablack-currantbushhaseversincerecalledtomethateveninginthelittlegardenbythesideofthelane-said,`Haveyouneverconsideredthathemaybeproud?'
`Proud?'Irepeated,withdisdainfulemphasis。
`Oh!therearemanykindsofpride,'saidBiddy,lookingfullatmeandshakingherhead;`prideisnotallofonekind——'
`Well?Whatareyoustoppingfor?'saidI。
`Notallofonekind,'resumedBiddy。`Hemaybetooproudtoletanyonetakehimoutofaplacethatheiscompetenttofill,andfillswellandwithrespect。Totellyouthetruth,Ithinkheis:thoughitsoundsboldinmetosayso,foryoumustknowhimfarbetterthanIdo。'
`Now,Biddy,'saidI,`Iamverysorrytoseethisinyou。Ididnotexpecttoseethisinyou。Youareenvious,Biddy,andgrudging。Youaredissatisfiedonaccountofmyriseinfortune,andyoucan'thelpshowingit。'
`Ifyouhavethehearttothinkso,'returnedBiddy,`sayso。Saysooverandoveragain,ifyouhavethehearttothinkso。'
`Ifyouhavethehearttobeso,youmean,Biddy,'saidI,inavirtuousandsuperiortone;`don'tputitoffuponme。Iamverysorrytoseeit,andit'sa-it'sabadsideofhumannature。IdidintendtoaskyoutouseanylittleopportunitiesyoumighthaveafterIwasgone,ofimprovingdearJoe。Butafterthis,Iaskyounothing。Iamextremelysorrytoseethisinyou,Biddy,'Irepeated。`It'sa-it'sabadsideofhumannature。'
`Whetheryouscoldmeorapproveofme,'returnedpoorBiddy,`youmayequallydependuponmytryingtodoallthatliesinmypower,here,atalltimes。Andwhateveropinionyoutakeawayofme,shallmakenodifferenceinmyremembranceofyou。Yetagentlemanshouldnotbeunjustneither,'
saidBiddy,turningawayherhead。
Iagainwarmlyrepeatedthatitwasabadsideofhumannatureinwhichsentiment,waivingitsapplication,IhavesinceseenreasontothinkI
wasright,andIwalkeddownthelittlepathawayfromBiddy,andBiddywentintothehouse,andIwentoutatthegardengateandtookadejectedstrolluntilsupper-time;againfeelingitverysorrowfulandstrangethatthis,thesecondnightofmybrightfortunes,shouldbeaslonelyandunsatisfactoryasthefirst。
But,morningoncemorebrightenedmyview,andIextendedmyclemencytoBiddy,andwedroppedthesubject。PuttingonthebestclothesIhad,IwentintotownasearlyasIcouldhopetofindtheshopsopen,andpresentedmyselfbeforeMrTrabb,thetailor:whowashavinghisbreakfastintheparlourbehindhisshop,andwhodidnotthinkitworthhiswhiletocomeouttome,butcalledmeintohim。
`Well!'saidMrTrabb,inahail-fellow-well-metkindofway。`Howareyou,andwhatcanIdoforyou?'
MrTrabbhadslicedhishotrollintothreefeatherbeds,andwasslippingbutterinbetweentheblankets,andcoveringitup。Hewasaprosperousoldbachelor,andhisopenwindowlookedintoaprosperouslittlegardenandorchard,andtherewasaprosperousironsafeletintothewallatthesideofhisfireplace,andIdidnotdoubtthatheapsofhisprosperitywereputawayinitinbags。
`MrTrabb,'saidI,`it'sanunpleasantthingtohavetomention,becauseitlookslikeboasting;butIhavecomeintoahandsomeproperty。'
AchangepassedoverMrTrabb。Heforgotthebutterinbed,gotupfromthebedside,andwipedhisfingersonthetable-cloth,exclaiming,`Lordblessmysoul!'
`IamgoinguptomyguardianinLondon,'saidI,casuallydrawingsomeguineasoutofmypocketandlookingatthem;`andIwantafashionablesuitofclothestogoin。Iwishtopayforthem,'Iadded-otherwiseIthoughthemightonlypretendtomakethem-`withreadymoney。'
`Mydearsir,'saidMrTrabb,asherespectfullybenthisbody,openedhisarms,andtookthelibertyoftouchingmeontheoutsideofeachelbow,`don'thurtmebymentioningthat。MayIventuretocongratulateyou?Wouldyoudomethefavourofsteppingintotheshop?'
MrTrabb'sboywasthemostaudaciousboyinallthatcountryside。WhenIhadenteredhewassweepingtheshop,andhehadsweetenedhislaboursbysweepingoverme。HewasstillsweepingwhenIcameoutintotheshopwithMrTrabb,andheknockedthebroomagainstallpossiblecornersandobstacles,toexpressasIunderstooditequalitywithanyblacksmith,aliveordead。
`Holdthatnoise,'saidMrTrabb,withthegreateststernness,`orI'llknockyourheadoff!Domethefavourtobeseated,sir。Now,this,'saidMrTrabb,takingdownarollofcloth,andtidingitoutinaflowingmanneroverthecounter,preparatorytogettinghishandunderittoshowthegloss,`isaverysweetarticle。Icanrecommenditforyourpurpose,sir,becauseitreallyisextrasuper。Butyoushallseesomeothers。GivemeNumberFour,you!'Totheboy,andwithadreadfullyseverestare:foreseeingthedangerofthatmiscreant'sbrushingmewithit,ormakingsomeothersignoffamiliarity。
MrTrabbneverremovedhissterneyefromtheboyuntilhehaddepositednumberfouronthecounterandwasatasafedistanceagain。Then,hecommandedhimtobringnumberfive,andnumbereight。`Andletmehavenoneofyourtrickshere,'saidMrTrabb,`oryoushallrepentit,youyoungscoundrel,thelongestdayyouhavetolive。'
MrTrabbthenbentovernumberfour,andinasortofdeferentialconfidencerecommendedittomeasalightarticleforsummerwear,anarticlemuchinvogueamongthenobilityandgentry,andarticlethatitwouldeverbeanhonourtohimtoreflectuponadistinguishedfellow-townsman'sifhemightclaimmeforafellowtownsmanhavingworn。`Areyoubringingnumbersfiveandeight,youvagabond,'saidMrTrabbtotheboyafterthat,`orshallIkickyououtoftheshopandbringthemmyself?'
Iselectedthematerialsforasuit,withtheassistanceofMrTrabb'sjudgment,andre-enteredtheparlourtobemeasured。For,althoughMrTrabbhadmymeasurealready,andhadpreviouslybeenquitecontentedwithit,hesaidapologeticallythatit`wouldn'tdounderexistingcircumstances,sir-wouldn'tdoatall。'So,MrTrabbmeasuredandcalculatedme,intheparlour,asifIwereanestateandhethefinestspeciesofsurveyor,andgavehimselfsuchaworldoftroublethatIfeltthatnosuitofclothescouldpossiblyremuneratehimforhispains。WhenhehadatlastdoneandhadappointedtosendthearticlestoMrPumblechook'sontheThursdayevening,hesaid,withhishandupontheparlourlock,`Iknow,sir,thatLondongentlemencannotbeexpectedtopatronizelocalwork,asarule;
butifyouwouldgivemeaturnnowandtheninthequalityofatownsman,Ishouldgreatlyesteemit。Goodmorning,sir,muchobliged-Door!'
Thelastwordwasflungattheboy,whohadnottheleastnotionwhatitmeant。ButIsawhimcollapseashismasterrubbedmeoutwithhishands,andmyfirstdecidedexperienceofthestupendouspowerofmoney,was,thatithadmorallylaiduponhisback,Trabb'sboy。
Afterthismemorableevent,Iwenttothehatter's,andthebootmaker's,andthehosier's,andfeltratherlikeMotherHubbard'sdogwhoseoutfitrequiredtheservicesofsomanytrades。Ialsowenttothecoach-officeandtookmyplaceforseveno'clockonSaturdaymorning。ItwasnotnecessarytoexplaineverywherethatIhadcomeintoahandsomeproperty;butwheneverIsaidanythingtothateffect,itfollowedthattheofficiatingtradesmanceasedtohavehisattentiondivertedthroughthewindowbytheHigh-street,andconcentratedhisminduponme。WhenIhadorderedeverythingIwanted,IdirectedmystepstowardsPumblechook's,and,asIapproachedthatgentleman'splaceofbusiness,Isawhimstandingathisdoor。
Hewaswaitingformewithgreatimpatience。Hehadbeenoutearlywiththechaise-cart,andhadcalledattheforgeandheardthenews。HehadpreparedacollationformeintheBarnwellparlour,andhetooorderedhisshopmanto`comeoutofthegangway'asmysacredpersonpassed。
`Mydearfriend,'saidMrPumblechook,takingmebybothhands,whenheandIandthecollationwerealone,`Igiveyoujoyofyourgoodfortune。
Welldeserved,welldeserved!'
Thiswascomingtothepoint,andIthoughtitasensiblewayofexpressinghimself。
`Tothink,'saidMrPumblechook,aftersnortingadmirationatmeforsomemoments,`thatIshouldhavebeenthehumbleinstrumentofleadinguptothis,isaproudreward。'
IbeggedMrPumblechooktorememberthatnothingwastobeeversaidorhinted,onthatpoint。
`Mydearyoungfriend,'saidMrPumblechook,`ifyouwillallowmetocallyouso——'
Imurmured`Certainly,'andMrPumblechooktookmebybothhandsagain,andcommunicatedamovementtohiswaistcoat,whichhadanemotionalappearance,thoughitwasratherlowdown,`Mydearyoungfriend,relyuponmydoingmylittleallinyourabsence,bykeepingthefactbeforethemindofJoseph-
Joseph!'saidMrPumblechook,inthewayofacompassionateadjuration。
`Joseph!!Joseph!!!'Thereuponheshookhisheadandtappedit,expressinghissenseofdeficiencyinJoseph。
`Butmydearyoungfriend,'saidMrPumblechook,`youmustbehungry,youmustbeexhausted。Beseated。HereisachickenhadroundfromtheBoar,hereisatonguehadroundfromtheBoar,here'soneortwolittlethingshadroundfromtheBoar,thatIhopeyoumaynotdespise。ButdoI,'saidMrPumblechook,gettingupagainthemomentafterhehadsatdown,`seeaforeme,himasIeversportedwithinhistimesofhappyinfancy?
AndmayI-mayI-?'
ThisMayI,meantmightheshakehands?Iconsented,andhewasfervent,andthensatdownagain。
`Hereiswine,'saidMrPumblechook。`Letusdrink,ThankstoFortune,andmaysheeverpickoutherfavouriteswithequaljudgment!AndyetI
cannot,'saidMrPumblechook,gettingupagain,`seeaforemeOne-andlikewisedrinktoOne-withoutagainexpressing-MayI-mayI-?'
Isaidhemight,andheshookhandswithmeagain,andemptiedhisglassandturneditupsidedown。Ididthesame;andifIhadturnedmyselfupsidedownbeforedrinking,thewinecouldnothavegonemoredirecttomyhead。
MrPumblechookhelpedmetotheliverwing,andtothebestsliceoftonguenoneofthoseout-of-the-wayNoThoroughfaresofPorknow,andtook,comparativelyspeaking,nocareofhimselfatall。`Ah!poultry,poultry!Youlittlethought,'saidMrPumblechook,apostrophizingthefowlinthedish,`whenyouwasayoungfledgling,whatwasinstoreforyou。
Youlittlethoughtyouwastoberefreshmentbeneaththishumbleroofforoneas-Callitaweakness,ifyouwill,'saidMrPumblechook,gettingupagain,`butmayI?mayI-?'
Itbegantobeunnecessarytorepeattheformofsayinghemight,sohediditatonce。Howheeverdiditsooftenwithoutwoundinghimselfwithmyknife,Idon'tknow。
`Andyoursister,'heresumed,afteralittlesteadyeating,`whichhadthehonourofbringingyouupbyhand!It'sasadpicter,toreflectthatshe'snolongerequaltofullyunderstandingthehonour。May——'
Isawhewasabouttocomeatmeagain,andIstoppedhim。
`We'lldrinkherhealth,'saidI。
`Ah!'criedMrPumblechook,leaningbackinhischair,quiteflaccidwithadmiration,`that'sthewayyouknow'em,sir!'Idon'tknowwhoSirwas,buthecertainlywasnotI,andtherewasnothirdpersonpresent;
`that'sthewayyouknowthenobleminded,sir!Everforgivingandeveraffable。Itmight,'saidtheservilePumblechook,puttingdownhisuntastedglassinahurryandgettingupagain,`toacommonperson,havetheappearanceofrepeating-butmayI-?'
Whenhehaddoneit,heresumedhisseatanddranktomysister。`Letusneverbeblind,'saidMrPumblechook,`toherfaultsoftemper,butitistobehopedshemeantwell。'
Ataboutthistime,Ibegantoobservethathewasgettingflushedintheface;astomyself,Ifeltallface,steepedinwineandsmarting。
ImentionedtoMrPumblechookthatIwishedtohavemynewclothessenttohishouse,andhewasecstaticonmysodistinguishinghim。Imentionedmyreasonfordesiringtoavoidobservationinthevillage,andhelaudedittotheskies。Therewasnobodybuthimself,heintimated,worthyofmyconfidence,and-inshort,mighthe?ThenheaskedmetenderlyifI
rememberedourboyishgamesatsums,andhowwehadgonetogethertohavemeboundapprentice,and,ineffect,howhehadeverbeenmyfavouritefancyandmychosenfriend?IfIhadtakententimesasmanyglassesofwineasIhad,Ishouldhaveknownthatheneverhadstoodinthatrelationtowardsme,andshouldinmyheartofheartshaverepudiatedtheidea。
Yetforallthat,IrememberfeelingconvincedthatIhadbeenmuchmistakeninhim,andthathewasasensiblepracticalgood-heartedprimefellow。
Bydegreeshefelltoreposingsuchgreatconfidenceinme,astoaskmyadviceinreferencetohisownaffairs。Hementionedthattherewasanopportunityforagreatamalgamationandmonopolyofthecornandseedtradeonthosepremises,ifenlarged,suchashadneveroccurredbeforeinthat,oranyotherneighbourhood。Whatalonewaswantingtotherealizationofavastfortune,heconsideredtobeMoreCapital。Thosewerethetwolittlewords,morecapital。NowitappearedtohimPumblechookthatifthatcapitalweregotintothebusiness,throughasleepingpartner,sir-whichsleepingpartnerwouldhavenothingtodobutwalkin,byselfordeputy,wheneverhepleased,andexaminethebooks-andwalkintwiceayearandtakehisprofitsawayinhispocket,tothetuneoffiftypercent-itappearedtohimthatthatmightbeanopeningforayounggentlemanofspiritcombinedwithproperty,whichwouldbeworthyofhisattention。
ButwhatdidIthink?Hehadgreatconfidenceinmyopinion,andwhatdidIthink?Igaveitasmyopinion。`Waitabit!'Theunitedvastnessanddistinctnessofthisviewsostruckhim,thathenolongeraskedifhemightshakehandswithme,butsaidhereallymust-anddid。
Wedrankallthewine,andMrPumblechookpledgedhimselfoverandoveragaintokeepJosephuptothemarkIdon'tknowwhatmark,andtorendermeefficientandconstantserviceIdon'tknowwhatservice。Healsomadeknowntomeforthefirsttimeinmylife,andcertainlyafterhavingkepthissecretwonderfullywell,thathehadalwayssaidofme,`Thatboyisnocommonboy,andmarkme,hisfortun'willbenocommonfortun'。'
Hesaidwithatearfulsmilethatitwasasingularthingtothinkofnow,andIsaidsotoo。Finally,Iwentoutintotheair,withadimperceptionthattherewassomethingunwontedintheconductofthesunshine,andfoundthatIhadslumberouslygottotheturn-pikewithouthavingtakenanyaccountoftheroad。
There,IwasrousedbyMrPumblechook'shailingme。Hewasalongwaydownthesunnystreet,andwasmakingexpressivegesturesformetostop。
Istopped,andhecameupbreathless。
`No,mydearfriend,'saidhe,whenhehadrecoveredwindforspeech。
`NotifIcanhelpit。Thisoccasionshallnotentirelypasswithoutthataffabilityonyourpart-MayI,asanoldfriendandwell-wisher?MayI?'
Weshookhandsforthehundredthtimeatleast,andheorderedayoungcarteroutofmywaywiththegreatestindignation。Then,heblessedmeandstoodwavinghishandtomeuntilIhadpassedthecrookintheroad;
andthenIturnedintoafieldandhadalongnapunderahedgebeforeIpursuedmywayhome。
IhadscantluggagetotakewithmetoLondon,forlittleofthelittleIpossessedwasadaptedtomynewstation。But,Ibeganpackingthatsameafternoon,andwildlypackedupthingsthatIknewIshouldwantnextmorning,inafictionthattherewasnotamomenttobelost。
So,Tuesday,Wednesday,andThursday,passed;andonFridaymorningIwenttoMrPumblechook's,toputonmynewclothesandpaymyvisittoMissHavisham。MrPumblechook'sownroomwasgivenuptometodressin,andwasdecoratedwithcleantowelsexpresslyfortheevent。Myclotheswereratheradisappointment,ofcourse。Probablyeverynewandeagerlyexpectedgarmenteverputonsinceclothescamein,fellatrifleshortofthewearer'sexpectation。ButafterIhadhadmynewsuiton,somehalfanhour,andhadgonethroughanimmensityofposturingwithMrPumblechook'sverylimiteddressing-glass,inthefutileendeavourtoseemylegs,itseemedtofitmebetter。Itbeingmarketmorningataneighbouringtownsometenmilesoff,MrPumblechookwasnotathome。IhadnottoldhimexactlywhenImeanttoleave,andwasnotlikelytoshakehandswithhimagainbeforedeparting。Thiswasallasitshouldbe,andIwentoutinmynewarray:fearfullyashamedofhavingtopasstheshopman,andsuspiciousafterallthatIwasatapersonaldisadvantage,somethinglikeJoe'sinhisSundaysuit。
IwentcircuitouslytoMissHavisham'sbyallthebackways,andrangatthebellconstrainedly,onaccountofthestifflongfingersofmygloves。
SarahPocketcametothegate,andpositivelyreeledbackwhenshesawmesochanged;herwalnut-shellcountenancelikewise,turnedfrombrowntogreenandyellow。
`You?'saidshe。`You,goodgracious!Whatdoyouwant?'
`IamgoingtoLondon,MissPocket,'saidI,`andwanttosaygood-byetoMissHavisham。'
Iwasnotexpected,forsheleftmelockedintheyard,whileshewenttoaskifIweretobeadmitted。Afteraveryshortdelay,shereturnedandtookmeup,staringatmealltheway。
MissHavishamwastakingexerciseintheroomwiththelongspreadtable,leaningonhercrutchstick。Theroomwaslightedasofyore,andatthesoundofourentrance,shestoppedandturned。Shewasthenjustabreastoftherottedbride-cake。
`Don'tgo,Sarah,'shesaid。`Well,Pip?'
`IstartforLondon,MissHavisham,to-morrow,'IwasexceedinglycarefulwhatIsaid,`andIthoughtyouwouldkindlynotmindmytakingleaveofyou。'
`Thisisagayfigure,Pip,'saidshe,makinghercrutchstickplayroundme,asifshe,thefairygodmotherwhohadchangedme,werebestowingthefinishinggift。
`IhavecomeintosuchgoodfortunesinceIsawyoulast,MissHavisham,'
Imurmured。`AndIamsogratefulforit,MissHavisham!'
`Ay,ay!'saidshe,lookingatthediscomfitedandenviousSarah,withdelight。`IhaveseenMrJaggers。Ihaveheardaboutit,Pip。Soyougoto-morrow?'
`Yes,MissHavisham。'
`Andyouareadoptedbyarichperson?'
`Yes,MissHavisham。'
`Notnamed?'
`No,MissHavisham。'
`AndMrJaggersismadeyourguardian?'
`Yes,MissHavisham。'
Shequitegloatedonthesequestionsandanswers,sokeenwasherenjoymentofSarahPocket'sjealousdismay。`Well!'shewenton;`youhaveapromisingcareerbeforeyou。Begood-deserveit-andabidebyMrJaggers'sinstructions。'
Shelookedatme,andlookedatSarah,andSarah'scountenancewrungoutofherwatchfulfaceacruelsmile。`Good-bye,Pip!-youwillalwayskeepthenameofPip,youknow。'
`Yes,MissHavisham。'
`Good-bye,Pip!'
Shestretchedoutherhand,andIwentdownonmykneeandputittomylips。IhadnotconsideredhowIshouldtakeleaveofher;itcamenaturallytomeatthemoment,todothis。ShelookedatSarahPocketwithtriumphinherweirdeyes,andsoIleftmyfairygodmother,withbothherhandsonhercrutchstick,standinginthemidstofthedimlylightedroombesidetherottenbridecakethatwashiddenincobwebs。
SarahPocketconductedmedown,asifIwereaghostwhomustbeseenout。Shecouldnotgetovermyappearance,andwasinthelastdegreeconfounded。
Isaid`Good-bye,MissPocket;'butshemerelystared,anddidnotseemcollectedenoughtoknowthatIhadspoken。Clearofthehouse,ImadethebestofmywaybacktoPumblechook's,tookoffmynewclothes,madethemintoabundle,andwentbackhomeinmyolderdress,carryingit-
tospeakthetruth-muchmoreatmyeasetoo,thoughIhadthebundletocarry。
Andnow,thosesixdayswhichweretohaverunoutsoslowly,hadrunoutfastandweregone,andto-morrowlookedmeinthefacemoresteadilythanIcouldlookatit。Asthesixeveningshaddwindledaway,tofive,tofour,tothree,totwo,IhadbecomemoreandmoreappreciativeofthesocietyofJoeandBiddy。Onthislastevening,Idressedmyselfoutinmynewclothes,fortheirdelight,andsatinmysplendouruntilbedtime。
Wehadahotsupperontheoccasion,gracedbytheinevitableroastfowl,andwehadsomefliptofinishwith。Wewereallverylow,andnonethehigherforpretendingtobeinspirits。
Iwastoleaveourvillageatfiveinthemorning,carryingmylittlehand-portmanteau,andIhadtoldJoethatIwishedtowalkawayallalone。
Iamafraid-soreafraid-thatthispurposeoriginatedinmysenseofthecontrasttherewouldbebetweenmeandJoe,ifwewenttothecoachtogether。Ihadpretendedwithmyselfthattherewasnothingofthistaintinthearrangement;butwhenIwentuptomylittleroomonthislastnight,Ifeltcompelledtoadmitthatitmightbeso,andhadanimpulseuponmetogodownagainandentreatJoetowalkwithmeinthemorning。Ididnot。
Allnighttherewerecoachesinmybrokensleep,goingtowrongplacesinsteadoftoLondon,andhavinginthetraces,nowdogs,nowcats,nowpigs,nowmen-neverhorses。Fantasticfailuresofjourneysoccupiedmeuntilthedaydawnedandthebirdsweresinging。Then,Igotupandpartlydressed,andsatatthewindowtotakealastlookout,andintakingitfellasleep。
Biddywasastirsoearlytogetmybreakfast,that,althoughIdidnotsleepatthewindowanhour,IsmeltthesmokeofthekitchenfirewhenIstartedupwithaterribleideathatitmustbelateintheafternoon。
Butlongafterthat,andlongafterIhadheardtheclinkingoftheteacupsandwasquiteready,Iwantedtheresolutiontogodownstairs。Afterall,Iremainedupthere,repeatedlyunlockingandunstrappingmysmallportmanteauandlockingandstrappingitupagain,untilBiddycalledtomethatI
waslate。
Itwasahurriedbreakfastwithnotasteinit。Igotupfromthemeal,sayingwithasortofbriskness,asifithadonlyjustoccurredtome,`Well!IsupposeImustbeoff!'andthenIkissedmysisterwhowaslaughingandnoddingandshakinginherusualchair,andkissedBiddy,andthrewmyarmsaroundJoe'sneck。ThenItookupmylittleportmanteauandwalkedout。ThelastIsawofthemwas,whenIpresentlyheardascufflebehindme,andlookingback,sawJoethrowinganoldshoeaftermeandBiddythrowinganotheroldshoe。Istoppedthen,towavemyhat,anddearoldJoewavedhisstrongrightarmabovehishead,cryinghuskily`Hooroar!'andBiddyputheraprontoherface。
Iwalkedawayatagoodpace,thinkingitwaseasiertogothanIhadsupposeditwouldbe,andreflectingthatitwouldneverhavedonetohavehadanoldshoethrownafterthecoach,insightofalltheHigh-street。
Iwhistledandmadenothingofgoing。Butthevillagewasverypeacefulandquiet,andthelightmistsweresolemnlyrising,asiftoshowmetheworld,andIhadbeensoinnocentandlittlethere,andallbeyondwassounknownandgreat,thatinamomentwithastrongheaveandsobIbrokeintotears。Itwasbythefinger-postattheendofthevillage,andI
laidmyhanduponit,andsaid,`Good-byeOmydear,dearfriend!'
Heavenknowsweneedneverbeashamedofourtears,fortheyarerainupontheblindingdustofearth,overlyingourhardhearts。IwasbetterafterIhadcried,thanbefore-moresorry,moreawareofmyowningratitude,moregentle。IfIhadcriedbefore,IshouldhavehadJoewithmethen。
SosubduedIwasbythosetears,andbytheirbreakingoutagaininthecourseofthequietwalk,thatwhenIwasonthecoach,anditwasclearofthetown,IdeliberatedwithanachingheartwhetherIwouldnotgetdownwhenwechangedhorsesandwalkback,andhaveanothereveningathome,andabetterparting。Wechanged,andIhadnotmadeupmymind,andstillreflectedformycomfortthatitwouldbequitepracticabletogetdownandwalkback,whenwechangedagain。AndwhileIwasoccupiedwiththesedeliberations,IwouldfancyanexactresemblancetoJoeinsomemancomingalongtheroadtowardsus,andmyheartwouldbeathigh-
Asifhecouldpossiblybethere!
Wechangedagain,andyetagain,anditwasnowtoolateandtoofartogoback,andIwenton。Andthemistshadallsolemnlyrisennow,andtheworldlayspreadbeforeme。
THISISTHEENDOFTHEFIRSTSTAGEOFPIP'SEXPECTATIONS。
Chapter20
THEjourneyfromourtowntothemetropolis,wasajourneyofaboutfivehours。Itwasalittlepastmid-daywhenthefourhorsestage-coachbywhichIwasapassenger,gotintotheraveloftrafficfrayedoutabouttheCrossKeys,Wood-street,Cheapside,London。
WeBritonshadatthattimeparticularlysettledthatitwastreasonabletodoubtourhavingandourbeingthebestofeverything:otherwise,whileIwasscaredbytheimmensityofLondon,IthinkImighthavehadsomefaintdoubtswhetheritwasnotratherugly,crooked,narrow,anddirty。
MrJaggershaddulysentmehisaddress;itwas,LittleBritain,andhehadwrittenafteritonhiscard,`justoutofSmithfield,andclosebythecoach-office。'Nevertheless,ahackney-coachman,whoseemedtohaveasmanycapestohisgreasygreat-coatashewasyearsold,packedmeupinhiscoachandhemmedmeinwithafoldingandjinglingbarrierofsteps,asifheweregoingtotakemefiftymiles。Hisgettingonhisbox,whichIremembertohavebeendecoratedwithanoldweather-stainedpea-greenhammerclothmoth-eatenintorags,wasquiteaworkoftime。Itwasawonderfulequipage,withsixgreatcoronetsoutside,andraggedthingsbehindforIdon'tknowhowmanyfootmentoholdonby,andaharrowbelowthem,topreventamateurfootmenfromyieldingtothetemptation。
Ihadscarcelyhadtimetoenjoythecoachandtothinkhowlikeastraw-yarditwas,andyethowlikearag-shop,andtowonderwhythehorses'nose-bagswerekeptinside,whenIobservedthecoachmanbeginningtogetdown,asifweweregoingtostoppresently。Andstopwepresentlydid,inagloomystreet,atcertainofficeswithanopendoor,whereonwaspaintedMR。JAGGERS。
`Howmuch?'Iaskedthecoachman。
Thecoachmananswered,`Ashilling-unlessyouwishtomakeitmore。'
InaturallysaidIhadnowishtomakeitmore。
`Thenitmustbeashilling,'observedthecoachman。`Idon'twanttogetintotrouble。Iknowhim!'HedarklyclosedaneyeatMrJaggers'sname,andshookhishead。
Whenhehadgothisshilling,andhadincourseoftimecompletedtheascenttohisbox,andhadgotawaywhichappearedtorelievehismind,Iwentintothefrontofficewithmylittleportmanteauinmyhandandasked,WasMrJaggersathome?
`Heisnot,'returnedtheclerk。`HeisinCourtatpresent。AmIaddressingMrPip?'
IsignifiedthathewasaddressingMrPip。
`MrJaggersleftwordwouldyouwaitinhisroom。Hecouldn'tsayhowlonghemightbe,havingacaseon。Butitstandstoreason,histimebeingvaluable,thathewon'tbelongerthanhecanhelp。'
Withthosewords,theclerkopenedadoor,andusheredmeintoaninnerchamberattheback。Here,wefoundagentlemanwithoneeye,inavelveteensuitandknee-breeches,whowipedhisnosewithhissleeveonbeinginterruptedintheperusalofthenewspaper。
`Goandwaitoutside,Mike,'saidtheclerk。
IbegantosaythatIhopedIwasnotinterrupting-whentheclerkshovedthisgentlemanoutwithaslittleceremonyasIeversawused,andtossinghisfurcapoutafterhim,leftmealone。
MrJaggers'sroomwaslightedbyaskylightonly,andwasamostdismalplace;theskylight,eccentricallypatchedlikeabrokenhead,andthedistortedadjoininghouseslookingasiftheyhadtwistedthemselvestopeepdownatmethroughit。Therewerenotsomanypapersabout,asIshouldhaveexpectedtosee;andthereweresomeoddobjectsabout,thatIshouldnothaveexpectedtosee-suchasanoldrustypistol,aswordinascabbard,severalstrange-lookingboxesandpackages,andtwodreadfulcastsonashelf,offacespeculiarlyswollen,andtwitchyaboutthenose。MrJaggers'sownhigh-backedchairwasofdeadlyblackhorse-hair,withrowsofbrassnailsroundit,likeacoffin;andIfanciedIcouldseehowheleanedbackinit,andbithisforefingerattheclients。Theroomwasbutsmall,andtheclientsseemedtohavehadahabitofbackingupagainstthewall:
thewall,especiallyoppositetoMrJaggers'schair,beinggreasywithshoulders。Irecalled,too,thattheone-eyedgentlemanhadshuffledforthagainstthewallwhenIwastheinnocentcauseofhisbeingturnedout。
IsatdownintheclientalchairplacedoveragainstMrJaggers'schair,andbecamefascinatedbythedismalatmosphereoftheplace。Icalledtomindthattheclerkhadthesameairofknowingsomethingtoeverybodyelse'sdisadvantage,ashismasterhad。Iwonderedhowmanyotherclerkstherewereup-stairs,andwhethertheyallclaimedtohavethesamedetrimentalmasteryoftheirfellow-creatures。Iwonderedwhatwasthehistoryofalltheoddlitterabouttheroom,andhowitcamethere。IwonderedwhetherthetwoswollenfaceswereofMrJaggers'sfamily,and,ifheweresounfortunateastohavehadapairofsuchill-lookingrelations,whyhestuckthemonthatdustyperchfortheblacksandfliestosettleon,insteadofgivingthemaplaceathome。OfcourseIhadnoexperienceofaLondonsummerday,andmyspiritsmayhavebeenoppressedbythehotexhaustedair,andbythedustandgritthatlaythickoneverything。ButIsatwonderingandwaitinginMrJaggers'scloseroom,untilIreallycouldnotbearthetwocastsontheshelfaboveMrJaggers'schair,andgotupandwentout。
WhenItoldtheclerkthatIwouldtakeaturnintheairwhileIwaited,headvisedmetogoroundthecornerandIshouldcomeintoSmithfield。
So,IcameintoSmithfield;andtheshamefulplace,beingallasmearwithfilthandfatandbloodandfoam,seemedtosticktome。So,IrubbeditoffwithallpossiblespeedbyturningintoastreetwhereIsawthegreatblackdomeofSaintPaul'sbulgingatmefrombehindagrimstonebuildingwhichabystandersaidwasNewgatePrison。Followingthewallofthejail,Ifoundtheroadwaycoveredwithstrawtodeadenthenoiseofpassingvehicles;
andfromthis,andfromthequantityofpeoplestandingabout,smellingstronglyofspiritsandbeer,Iinferredthatthetrialswereon。
WhileIlookedaboutmehere,anexceedinglydirtyandpartiallydrunkministerofjusticeaskedmeifIwouldliketostepinandhearatrialorso:informingmethathecouldgivemeafrontplaceforhalf-a-crown,whenceIshouldcommandafullviewoftheLordChiefJusticeinhiswigandrobes-mentioningthatawfulpersonagelikewaxwork,andpresentlyofferinghimatthereducedpriceofeighteenpence。AsIdeclinedtheproposalonthepleaofanappointment,hewassogoodastotakemeintoayardandshowmewherethegallowswaskept,andalsowherepeoplewerepubliclywhipped,andthenheshowedmetheDebtors'Door,outofwhichculpritscametobehanged:heighteningtheinterestofthatdreadfulportalbygivingmetounderstandthat`fouron'em'wouldcomeoutatthatdoorthedayafterto-morrowateightinthemorning,tobekilledinarow。
Thiswashorrible,andgavemeasickeningideaofLondon:themoresoastheLordChiefJustice'sproprietorworefromhishatdowntohisbootsandupagaintohispocket-handkerchiefinclusivemildewedclothes,whichhadevidentlynotbelongedtohimoriginally,andwhich,Itookitintomyhead,hehadboughtcheapoftheexecutioner。UnderthesecircumstancesIthoughtmyselfwellridofhimforashilling。
IdroppedintotheofficetoaskifMrJaggershadcomeinyet,andIfoundhehadnot,andIstrolledoutagain。Thistime,ImadethetourofLittleBritain,andturnedintoBartholomewClose;andnowIbecameawarethatotherpeoplewerewaitingaboutforMrJaggers,aswellasI。
ThereweretwomenofsecretappearancelounginginBartholomewClose,andthoughtfullyfittingtheirfeetintothecracksofthepavementastheytalkedtogether,oneofwhomsaidtotheotherwhentheyfirstpassedme,that`Jaggerswoulddoitifitwastobedone。'Therewasaknotofthreemenandtwowomenstandingatacorner,andoneofthewomenwascryingonherdirtyshawl,andtheothercomfortedherbysaying,asshepulledherownshawloverhershoulders,`Jaggersisforhim,'Melia,andwhatmorecouldyouhave?'Therewasared-eyedlittleJewwhocameintotheClosewhileIwasloiteringthere,incompanywithasecondlittleJewwhomhesentuponanerrand;andwhilethemessengerwasgone,IremarkedthisJew,whowasofahighlyexcitabletemperament,performingajigofanxietyunderalamp-postandaccompanyinghimself,inakindoffrenzy,withthewords,`OhJaggerth,Jaggerth,Jaggerth!allotherthithCag-Maggerth,givemeJaggerth!'Thesetestimoniestothepopularityofmyguardianmadeadeepimpressiononme,andIadmiredandwonderedmorethanever。
Atlength,asIwaslookingoutattheirongateofBartholomewCloseintoLittleBritain,IsawMrJaggerscomingacrosstheroadtowardsme。
Alltheotherswhowerewaiting,sawhimatthesametime,andtherewasquitearushathim。MrJaggers,puttingahandonmyshoulderandwalkingmeonathissidewithoutsayinganythingtome,addressedhimselftohisfollowers。
First,hetookthetwosecretmen。
`Now,Ihavenothingtosaytoyou,'saidMrJaggers,throwinghisfingeratthem。`IwanttoknownomorethanIknow。Astotheresult,it'satoss-up。Itoldyoufromthefirstitwastoss-up。HaveyoupaidWemmick?'
`Wemadethemoneyupthismorning,sir,'saidoneofthemen,submissively,whiletheotherperusedMrJaggers'sface。
`Idon'taskyouwhenyoumadeitup,orwhere,orwhetheryoumadeitupatall。HasWemmickgotit?'
`Yes,sir,'saidboththementogether。
`Verywell;thenyoumaygo。Now,Iwon'thaveit!'saidMrJaggers,wavinghishandatthemtoputthembehindhim。`Ifyousayawordtome,I'llthrowupthecase。'
`Wethought,MrJaggers——'oneofthemenbegan,pullingoffhishat。
`That'swhatItoldyounottodo,'saidMrJaggers。`Youthought!
Ithinkforyou;that'senoughforyou。IfIwantyou,Iknowwheretofindyou;Idon'twantyoutofindme。NowIwon'thaveit。Iwon'thearaword。'
ThetwomenlookedatoneanotherasMrJaggerswavedthembehindagain,andhumblyfellbackandwereheardnomore。
`Andnowyou!'saidMrJaggers,suddenlystopping,andturningonthetwowomenwiththeshawls,fromwhomthethreemenhadmeeklyseparated-
`Oh!Amelia,isit?'
`Yes,MrJaggers。'
`Anddoyouremember,'retortedMrJaggers,`thatbutformeyouwouldn'tbehereandcouldn'tbehere?'
`Ohyes,sir!'exclaimedbothwomentogether。`Lordblessyou,sir,wellweknowsthat!'
`Thenwhy,'saidMrJaggers,`doyoucomehere?'
`MyBill,sir!'thecryingwomanpleaded。
`Now,Itellyouwhat!'saidMrJaggers。`Onceforall。Ifyoudon'tknowthatyourBill'singoodhands,Iknowit。Andifyoucomehere,botheringaboutyourBill,I'llmakeanexampleofbothyourBillandyou,andlethimslipthroughmyfingers。HaveyoupaidWemmick?'
`Ohyes,sir!Everyfarden。'
`Verywell。Thenyouhavedoneallyouhavegottodo。Sayanotherword-onesingleword-andWemmickshallgiveyouyourmoneyback。'
Thisterriblethreatcausedthetwowomentofalloffimmediately。NooneremainednowbuttheexcitableJew,whohadalreadyraisedtheskirtsofMrJaggers'scoattohislipsseveraltimes。
`Idon'tknowthisman!'saidMrJaggers,inthesamedevastatingstrain:
`Whatdoesthisfellowwant?'
`MathearMithterJaggerth。HownbrothertoHabrahamLatharuth?'
`Who'she?'saidMrJaggers。`Letgoofmycoat。'
Thesuitor,kissingthehemofthegarmentagainbeforerelinquishingit,replied,`HabrahamLatharuth,onthuthpithionofplate。'
`You'retoolate,'saidMrJaggers。`Iamovertheway。'
`Holyfather,MithterJaggerth!'criedmyexcitableacquaintance,turningwhite,`don'tthayyou'reagainHabrahamLatharuth!'
`Iam,'saidMrJaggers,`andthere'sanendofit。Getoutoftheway。'
`MithterJaggerth!Halfamoment!Myhowncuthen'thgonetoMithterWemmickatthithprethentminute,tohofferhimhanytermth。MithterJaggerth!
Halfaquarterofamoment!Ifyou'dhavethecondethenthuntobeboughtofffromthet'otherthide-athanythuperiorprithe!-moneynoobject!-
MithterJaggerth-Mithter-!'
Myguardianthrewhissupplicantoffwithsupremeindifference,andlefthimdancingonthepavementasifitwerered-hot。Withoutfurtherinterruption,wereachedthefrontoffice,wherewefoundtheclerkandthemaninvelveteenwiththefurcap。
`Here'sMike,'saidtheclerk,gettingdownfromhisstool,andapproachingMrJaggersconfidentially。
`Oh!'saidMrJaggers,turningtotheman,whowaspullingalockofhairinthemiddleofhisforehead,liketheBullinCockRobinpullingatthebell-rope;`yourmancomesonthisafternoon。Well?'
`Well,Mas'rJaggers,'returnedMike,inthevoiceofasuffererfromaconstitutionalcold;`arteradealo'trouble,I'vefoundone,sir,asmightdo。'
`Whatishepreparedtoswear?'
`Well,Mas'rJaggers,'saidMike,wipinghisnoseonhisfurcapthistime;`inageneralway,anythink。'
MrJaggerssuddenlybecamemostirate。`Now,Iwarnedyoubefore,'saidhe,throwinghisforefingerattheterrifiedclient,`thatifyoueverpresumedtotalkinthatwayhere,I'dmakeanexampleofyou。Youinfernalscoundrel,howdareyoutellMEthat?'
Theclientlookedscared,butbewilderedtoo,asifhewereunconsciouswhathehaddone。
`Spooney!'saidtheclerk,inalowvoice,givinghimastirwithhiselbow。`SoftHead!Needyousayitfacetoface?'
`Now,Iaskyou,youblunderingbooby,'saidmyguardian,verysternly,`oncemoreandforthelasttime,whatthemanyouhavebroughthereispreparedtoswear?'
Mikelookedhardatmyguardian,asifheweretryingtolearnalessonfromhisface,andslowlyreplied,`Aythertocharacter,ortohavingbeeninhiscompanyandneverlefthimallthenightinquestion。'
`Now,becareful。Inwhatstationoflifeisthisman?'
Mikelookedathiscap,andlookedatthefloor,andlookedattheceiling,andlookedattheclerk,andevenlookedatme,beforebeginningtoreplyinanervousmanner,`We'vedressedhimuplike——'whenmyguardianblusteredout:
`What?YouWILL,willyou?'
`Spooney!'addedtheclerkagain,withanotherstir。
Aftersomehelplesscastingabout,Mikebrightenedandbeganagain:
`Heisdressedlikea'spectablepieman。Asortofapastry-cook。'
`Ishehere?'askedmyguardian。
`Ilefthim,'saidMike,`asettinonsomedoorstepsroundthecorner。'
`Takehimpastthatwindow,andletmeseehim。'
Thewindowindicated,wastheofficewindow。Weallthreewenttoit,behindthewireblind,andpresentlysawtheclientgobyinanaccidentalmanner,withamurderous-lookingtallindividual,inashortsuitofwhitelinenandapapercap。Thisguilelessconfectionerwasnotbyanymeanssober,andhadablackeyeinthegreenstageofrecovery,whichwaspaintedover。
`Tellhimtotakehiswitnessawaydirectly,'saidmyguardiantotheclerk,inextremedisgust,`andaskhimwhathemeansbybringingsuchafellowasthat。'
Myguardianthentookmeintohisownroom,andwhilehelunched,standing,fromasandwich-boxandapocketflaskofsherryheseemedtobullyhisverysandwichasheateit,informedmewhatarrangementshehadmadeforme。Iwastogoto`Barnard'sInn,'toyoungMrPocket'srooms,whereabedhadbeensentinformyaccommodation;IwastoremainwithyoungMrPocketuntilMonday;onMondayIwastogowithhimtohisfather'shouseonavisit,thatImighttryhowIlikedit。Also,Iwastoldwhatmyallowancewastobe-itwasaveryliberalone-andhadhandedtomefromoneofmyguardian'sdrawers,thecardsofcertaintradesmenwithwhomIwastodealforallkindsofclothes,andsuchotherthingsasI
couldinreasonwant。`Youwillfindyourcreditgood,MrPip,'saidmyguardian,whoseflaskofsherrysmeltlikeawholecask-full,ashehastilyrefreshedhimself,`butIshallbythismeansbeabletocheckyourbills,andtopullyouupifIfindyououtrunningtheconstable。Ofcourseyou'llgowrongsomehow,butthat'snofaultofmine。'
AfterIhadponderedalittleoverthisencouragingsentiment,IaskedMrJaggersifIcouldsendforacoach?Hesaiditwasnotworthwhile,Iwassonearmydestination;Wemmickshouldwalkroundwithme,ifIpleased。
IthenfoundthatWemmickwastheclerkinthenextroom。Anotherclerkwasrungdownfromup-stairstotakehisplacewhilehewasout,andI
accompaniedhimintothestreet,aftershakinghandswithmyguardian。
Wefoundanewsetofpeoplelingeringoutside,butWemmickmadeawayamongthembysayingcoollyyetdecisively,`Itellyouit'snouse;hewon'thaveawordtosaytooneofyou;'andwesoongotclearofthem,andwentonsidebyside。
Chapter21
CASTINGmyeyesonMrWemmickaswewentalong,toseewhathewaslikeinthelightofday,Ifoundhimtobeadryman,rathershortinstature,withasquarewoodenface,whoseexpressionseemedtohavebeenimperfectlychippedoutwithadull-edgedchisel。Thereweresomemarksinitthatmighthavebeendimples,ifthematerialhadbeensofterandtheinstrumentfiner,butwhich,asitwas,wereonlydints。Thechiselhadmadethreeorfouroftheseattemptsatembellishmentoverhisnose,buthadgiventhemupwithoutanefforttosmooththemoff。Ijudgedhimtobeabachelorfromthefrayedconditionofhislinen,andheappearedtohavesustainedagoodmanybereavements;for,heworeatleastfourmourningrings,besidesabroochrepresentingaladyandaweepingwillowatatombwithanurnonit。Inoticed,too,thatseveralringsandsealshungathiswatchchain,asifhewerequiteladenwithremembrancesofdepartedfriends。Hehadglitteringeyes-small,keen,andblack-andthinwidemottledlips。Hehadhadthem,tothebestofmybelief,fromfortytofiftyyears。
`SoyouwereneverinLondonbefore?'saidMrWemmicktome。
`No,'saidI。
`Iwasnewhereonce,'saidMrWemmick。`Rumtothinkofnow!'
`Youarewellacquaintedwithitnow?'
`Why,yes,'saidMrWemmick。`Iknowthemovesofit。'
`Isitaverywickedplace?'Iasked,moreforthesakeofsayingsomethingthanforinformation。
`Youmaygetcheated,robbed,andmurdered,inLondon。Butthereareplentyofpeopleanywhere,who'lldothatforyou。'
`Ifthereisbadbloodbetweenyouandthem,'saidI,tosoftenitoffalittle。
`Oh!Idon'tknowaboutbadblood,'returnedMrWemmick;`there'snotmuchbadbloodabout。They'lldoit,ifthere'sanythingtobegotbyit。'
`Thatmakesitworse。'
`Youthinkso?'returnedMrWemmick。`Muchaboutthesame,Ishouldsay。'
Heworehishatonthebackofhishead,andlookedstraightbeforehim:walkinginaself-containedwayasiftherewerenothinginthestreetstoclaimhisattention。Hismouthwassuchapostofficeofamouththathehadamechanicalappearanceofsmiling。WehadgottothetopofHolbornHillbeforeIknewthatitwasmerelyamechanicalappearance,andthathewasnotsmilingatall。
`DoyouknowwhereMrMatthewPocketlives?'IaskedMrWemmick。
`Yes,'saidhe,noddinginthedirection。`AtHammersmith,westofLondon。'
`Isthatfar?'
`Well!Sayfivemiles。'
`Doyouknowhim?'
`Why,you'rearegularcross-examiner!'saidMrWemmick,lookingatmewithanapprovingair。`Yes,Iknowhim。Iknowhim!'
Therewasanairoftolerationordepreciationabouthisutteranceofthesewords,thatratherdepressedme;andIwasstilllookingsidewaysathisblockofafaceinsearchofanyencouragingnotetothetext,whenhesaidherewewereatBarnard'sInn。Mydepressionwasnotalleviatedbytheannouncement,for,IhadsupposedthatestablishmenttobeanhotelkeptbyMrBarnard,towhichtheBlueBoarinourtownwasamerepublic-house。
WhereasInowfoundBarnardtobeadisembodiedspirit,orafiction,andhisinnthedingiestcollectionofshabbybuildingseversqueezedtogetherinarankcornerasaclubforTom-cats。
Weenteredthishaventhroughawicket-gate,andweredisgorgedbyanintroductorypassageintoamelancholylittlesquarethatlookedtomelikeaflatburying-ground。Ithoughtithadthemostdismaltreesinit,andthemostdismalsparrows,andthemostdismalcats,andthemostdismalhousesinnumberhalfadozenorso,thatIhadeverseen。Ithoughtthewindowsofthesetsofchambersintowhichthosehousesweredivided,wereineverystageofdilapidatedblindandcurtain,crippledflower-pot,crackedglass,dustydecay,andmiserablemakeshift;whileToLetToLetToLet,glaredatmefromemptyrooms,asifnonewwretchesevercamethere,andthevengeanceofthesoulofBarnardwerebeingslowlyappeasedbythegradualsuicideofthepresentoccupantsandtheirunholyintermentunderthegravel。AfrouzymourningofsootandsmokeattiredthisforlorncreationofBarnard,andithadstrewnashesonitshead,andwasundergoingpenanceandhumiliationasameredust-hole。Thusfarmysenseofsight;
whiledryrotandwetrotandallthesilentrotsthatrotinneglectedroofandcellar-rotofratandmouseandbugandcoaching-stablesnearathandbesides-addressedthemselvesfaintlytomysenseofsmell,andmoaned,`TryBarnard'sMixture。'
Soimperfectwasthisrealizationofthefirstofmygreatexpectations,thatIlookedindismayatMrWemmick。`Ah!'saidhe,mistakingme;`theretirementremindsyouofthecountry。Soitdoesme。'
Heledmeintoacornerandconductedmeupaflightofstairs-whichappearedtometobeslowlycollapsingintosawdust,sothatoneofthosedaystheupperlodgerswouldlookoutattheirdoorsandfindthemselveswithoutthemeansofcomingdown-toasetofchambersonthetopfloor。
MR。POCKET,JUN。,waspaintedonthedoor,andtherewasalabelontheletter-box,`Returnshortly。'
`Hehardlythoughtyou'dcomesosoon,'MrWemmickexplained。`Youdon'twantmeanymore?'
`No,thankyou,'saidI。
`AsIkeepthecash,'MrWemmickobserved,`weshallmostlikelymeetprettyoften。Goodday。'
`Goodday。'
Iputoutmyhand,andMrWemmickatfirstlookedatitasifhethoughtIwantedsomething。Thenhelookedatme,andsaid,correctinghimself,`Tobesure!Yes。You'reinthehabitofshakinghands?'
Iwasratherconfused,thinkingitmustbeoutoftheLondonfashion,butsaidyes。
`Ihavegotsooutofit!'saidMrWemmick-`exceptatlast。Veryglad,I'msure,tomakeyouracquaintance。Goodday!'
Whenwehadshakenhandsandhewasgone,Iopenedthestaircasewindowandhadnearlybeheadedmyself,for,thelineshadrottedaway,anditcamedownliketheguillotine。HappilyitwassoquickthatIhadnotputmyheadout。Afterthisescape,IwascontenttotakeafoggyviewoftheInnthroughthewindow'sencrustingdirt,andtostanddolefullylookingout,sayingtomyselfthatLondonwasdecidedlyoverrated。
MrPocket,Junior's,ideaofShortlywasnotmine,forIhadnearlymaddenedmyselfwithlookingoutforhalfanhour,andhadwrittenmynamewithmyfingerseveraltimesinthedirtofeverypaneinthewindow,beforeIheardfootstepsonthestairs。Graduallytherearosebeforemethehat,head,neckcloth,waistcoat,trousers,boots,ofamemberofsocietyofaboutmyownstanding。Hehadapaper-bagundereacharmandapottleofstrawberriesinonehand,andwasoutofbreath。
`MrPip?'saidhe。
`MrPocket?'saidI。
`Dearme!'heexclaimed。`Iamextremelysorry;butIknewtherewasacoachfromyourpartofthecountryatmidday,andIthoughtyouwouldcomebythatone。Thefactis,Ihavebeenoutonyouraccount-notthatthatisanyexcuse-forIthought,comingfromthecountry,youmightlikealittlefruitafterdinner,andIwenttoConventGardenMarkettogetitgood。'
ForareasonthatIhad,Ifeltasifmyeyeswouldstartoutofmyhead。Iacknowledgedhisattentionincoherently,andbegantothinkthiswasadream。
`Dearme!'saidMrPocket,Junior。`Thisdoorsticksso!'
Ashewasfastmakingjamofhisfruitbywrestlingwiththedoorwhilethepaper-bagswereunderhisarms,Ibeggedhimtoallowmetoholdthem。
Herelinquishedthemwithanagreeablesmile,andcombatedwiththedoorasifitwereawildbeast。Ityieldedsosuddenlyatlast,thathestaggeredbackuponme,andIstaggeredbackupontheoppositedoor,andwebothlaughed。ButstillIfeltasifmyeyesmuststartoutofmyhead,andasifthismustbeadream。
`Praycomein,'saidMrPocket,Junior。`Allowmetoleadtheway。I
amratherbarehere,butIhopeyou'llbeabletomakeouttolerablywelltillMonday。Myfatherthoughtyouwouldgetonmoreagreeablythroughto-morrowwithmethanwithhim,andmightliketotakeawalkaboutLondon。
IamsureIshallbeveryhappytoshowLondontoyou。Astoourtable,youwon'tfindthatbad,Ihope,foritwillbesuppliedfromourcoffee-househere,anditisonlyrightIshouldaddatyourexpense,suchbeingMrJaggers'sdirections。AStoourlodging,it'snotbyanymeanssplendid,becauseIhavemyownbreadtoearn,andmyfatherhasn'tanythingtogiveme,andIshouldn'tbewillingtotakeit,ifhehad。Thisisoursitting-room-justsuchchairsandtablesandcarpetandsoforth,yousee,astheycouldsparefromhome。Youmustn'tgivemecreditforthetableclothandspoonsandcastors,becausetheycomeforyoufromthecoffee-house。Thisismylittlebedroom;rathermusty,butBarnard'sismusty。Thisisyourbed-room;thefurniture'shiredfortheoccasion,butItrustitwillanswerthepurpose;ifyoushouldwantanything,I'llgoandfetchit。Thechambersareretired,andweshallbealonetogether,butweshan'tfight,Idaresay。But,dearme,Ibegyourpardon,you'reholdingthefruitallthistime。Prayletmetakethesebagsfromyou。Iamquiteashamed。'
AsIstoodoppositetoMrPocket,Junior,deliveringhimthebags,One,Two,IsawthestartingappearancecomeintohisowneyesthatIknewtobeinmine,andhesaid,fallingback:
`Lordblessme,you'retheprowlingboy!'
`Andyou,'saidI,`arethepaleyounggentleman!'
Chapter22
THEpaleyounggentlemanandIstoodcontemplatingoneanotherinBarnard'sInn,untilwebothburstoutlaughing。`Theideaofitsbeingyou!'saidhe。`Theideaofitsbeingyou!'saidI。Andthenwecontemplatedoneanotherafresh,andlaughedagain。`Well!'saidthepaleyounggentleman,reachingouthishandgoodhumouredly,`it'sallovernow,Ihope,anditwillbemagnanimousinyouifyou'llforgivemeforhavingknockedyouaboutso。'
IderivedfromthisspeechthatMrHerbertPocketforHerbertwasthepaleyounggentleman'snamestillratherconfoundedhisintentionwithhisexecution。ButImadeamodestreply,andweshookhandswarmly。
`Youhadn'tcomeintoyourgoodfortuneatthattime?'saidHerbertPocket。
`No,'saidI。
`No,'heacquiesced:`Iheardithadhappenedverylately。Iwasratheronthelook-outforgood-fortunethen。'
`Indeed?'
`Yes。MissHavishamhadsentforme,toseeifshecouldtakeafancytome。Butshecouldn't-atallevents,shedidn't。'
IthoughtitpolitetoremarkthatIwassurprisedtohearthat。
`Badtaste,'saidHerbert,laughing,`butafact。Yes,shehadsentformeonatrialvisit,andifIhadcomeoutofitsuccessfully,IsupposeIshouldhavebeenprovidedfor;perhapsIshouldhavebeenwhat-you-may-calledittoEstella。'
`What'sthat?'Iasked,withsuddengravity。
Hewasarranginghisfruitinplateswhilewetalked,whichdividedhisattention,andwasthecauseofhishavingmadethislapseofaword。
`Affianced,'heexplained,stillbusywiththefruit。`Betrothed。Engaged。
What's-his-named。Anywordofthatsort。'
`Howdidyoubearyourdisappointment?'Iasked。
`Pooh!'saidhe,`Ididn'tcaremuchforit。She'saTartar。'
`MissHavisham?'
`Idon'tsaynotothat,butImeantEstella。Thatgirl'shardandhaughtyandcapricioustothelastdegree,andhasbeenbroughtupbyMissHavishamtowreakrevengeonallthemalesex。'
`WhatrelationisshetoMissHavisham?'
`None,'saidhe。`Onlyadopted。'
`Whyshouldshewreakrevengeonallthemalesex?Whatrevenge?'
`Lord,MrPip!'saidhe。`Don'tyouknow?'
`No,'saidI。
`Dearme!It'squiteastory,andshallbesavedtilldinner-time。
Andnowletmetakethelibertyofaskingyouaquestion。Howdidyoucomethere,thatday?'
Itoldhim,andhewasattentiveuntilIhadfinished,andthenburstoutlaughingagain,andaskedmeifIwassoreafterwards?Ididn'taskhimifhewas,formyconvictiononthatpointwasperfectlyestablished。
`MrJaggersisyourguardian,Iunderstand?'hewenton。
`Yes。'
`YouknowheisMissHavisham'smanofbusinessandsolicitor,andhasherconfidencewhennobodyelsehas?'
ThiswasbringingmeIfelttowardsdangerousground。IansweredwithaconstraintImadenoattempttodisguise,thatIhadseenMrJaggersinMissHavisham'shouseontheverydayofourcombat,butneveratanyothertime,andthatIbelievedhehadnorecollectionofhavingeverseenmethere。
`Hewassoobligingastosuggestmyfatherforyourtutor,andhecalledonmyfathertoproposeit。OfcourseheknewaboutmyfatherfromhisconnexionwithMissHavisham。MyfatherisMissHavisham'scousin;notthatthatimpliesfamiliarintercoursebetweenthem,forheisabadcourtierandwillnotpropitiateher。'
HerbertPockethadafrankandeasywaywithhimthatwasverytaking。
Ihadneverseenanyonethen,andIhaveneverseenanyonesince,whomorestronglyexpressedtome,ineverylookandtone,anaturalincapacitytodoanythingsecretandmean。Therewassomethingwonderfullyhopefulabouthisgeneralair,andsomethingthatatthesametimewhisperedtomehewouldneverbeverysuccessfulorrich。Idon'tknowhowthiswas。