CHAPTERLXVI
　　WHICHTREATSOFWHATHEWHOREADSWILLSEE，ORWHATHEWHOHASIT
　　READTOHIMWILLHEAR
　　ASHEleftBarcelona，DonQuixoteturnedgazeuponthespotwherehehadfallen。“HereTroywas，“saidhe；“heremyill-luck，notmycowardice，robbedmeofallthegloryIhadwon；hereFortunemademethevictimofhercaprices；herethelustreofmyachievementswasdimmed；here，inaword，fellmyhappinessnevertoriseagain。“
　　“Senor，“saidSanchoonhearingthis，“itisthepartofbraveheartstobepatientinadversityjustasmuchastobegladinprosperity；Ijudgebymyself，for，ifwhenIwasagovernorIwasglad，nowthatIamasquireandonfootIamnotsad；andIhaveheardsaythatshewhomcommonlytheycallFortuneisadrunkenwhimsicaljade，and，whatismore，blind，andthereforeneitherseeswhatshedoes，norknowswhomshecastsdownorwhomshesetsup。“
　　“Thouartagreatphilosopher，Sancho，“saidDonQuixote；“thouspeakestverysensibly；Iknownotwhotaughtthee。ButIcantelltheethereisnosuchthingasFortuneintheworld，nordoesanythingwhichtakesplacethere，beitgoodorbad，comeaboutbychance，butbythespecialpreordinationofheaven；andhencethecommonsayingthat'eachofusisthemakerofhisownFortune。'Ihavebeenthatofmine；butnotwiththeproperamountofprudence，andmyself-confidencehasthereforemademepaydearly；forIoughttohavereflectedthatRocinante'sfeeblestrengthcouldnotresistthemightybulkoftheKnightoftheWhiteMoon'shorse。Inaword，I
　　venturedit，Ididmybest，Iwasoverthrown，butthoughIlostmyhonourIdidnotlosenorcanIlosethevirtueofkeepingmyword。
　　WhenIwasaknight-errant，daringandvaliant，Isupportedmyachievementsbyhandanddeed，andnowthatIamahumblesquireI
　　willsupportmywordsbykeepingthepromiseIhavegiven。Forwardthen，Sanchomyfriend，letusgotokeeptheyearofthenovitiateinourowncountry，andinthatseclusionweshallpickupfreshstrengthtoreturntothebymenever-forgottencallingofarms。“
　　“Senor，“returnedSancho，“travellingonfootisnotsuchapleasantthingthatitmakesmefeeldisposedortemptedtomakelongmarches。Letusleavethisarmourhunguponsometree，insteadofsomeonethathasbeenhanged；andthenwithmeonDapple'sbackandmyfeetoffthegroundwewillarrangethestagesasyourworshippleasestomeasurethemout；buttosupposethatIamgoingtotravelonfoot，andmakelongones，istosupposenonsense。“
　　“Thousayestwell，Sancho，“saidDonQuixote；“letmyarmourbehungupforatrophy，andunderitorrounditwewillcarveonthetreeswhatwasinscribedonthetrophyofRoland'sarmour-
　　TheseletnonemoveWhodarethnothismightwithRolandprove。“
　　“That'stheverything，“saidSancho；“andifitwasnotthatweshouldfeelthewantofRocinanteontheroad，itwouldbeaswelltoleavehimhunguptoo。“
　　“Andyet，Ihadrathernothaveeitherhimorthearmourhungup，“
　　saidDonQuixote，“thatitmaynotbesaid，'forgoodserviceabadreturn。'“
　　“Yourworshipisright，“saidSancho；“for，assensiblepeoplehold，'thefaultoftheassmustnotbelaidonthepack-saddle；'and，asinthisaffairthefaultisyourworship's，punishyourselfanddon'tletyourangerbreakoutagainstthealreadybatteredandbloodyarmour，orthemeeknessofRocinante，orthetendernessofmyfeet，tryingtomakethemtravelmorethanisreasonable。“
　　Inconverseofthissortthewholeofthatdaywentby，asdidthefoursucceedingones，withoutanythingoccurringtointerrupttheirjourney，butonthefifthastheyenteredavillagetheyfoundagreatnumberofpeopleatthedoorofaninnenjoyingthemselves，asitwasaholiday。UponDonQuixote'sapproachapeasantcalledout，“Oneofthesetwogentlemenwhocomehere，andwhodon'tknowtheparties，willtelluswhatweoughttodoaboutourwager。“
　　“ThatIwill，certainly，“saidDonQuixote，“andaccordingtotherightsofthecase，ifIcanmanagetounderstandit。“
　　“Well，hereitis，worthysir，“saidthepeasant；“amanofthisvillagewhoissofatthatheweighstwentystonechallengedanother，aneighbourofhis，whodoesnotweighmorethannine，torunarace。Theagreementwasthattheyweretorunadistanceofahundredpaceswithequalweights；andwhenthechallengerwasaskedhowtheweightsweretobeequalisedhesaidthattheother，asheweighedninestone，shouldputeleveninirononhisback，andthatinthiswaythetwentystoneofthethinmanwouldequalthetwentystoneofthefatone。“
　　“Notatall，“exclaimedSanchoatonce，beforeDonQuixotecouldanswer；“it'sforme，thatonlyafewdaysagoleftoffbeingagovernorandajudge，asalltheworldknows，tosettlethesedoubtfulquestionsandgiveanopinionindisputesofallsorts。“
　　“AnswerinGod'sname，Sanchomyfriend，“saidDonQuixote，“forI
　　amnotfittogivecrumbstoacat，mywitsaresoconfusedandupset。“
　　WiththispermissionSanchosaidtothepeasantswhostoodclusteredroundhim，waitingwithopenmouthsforthedecisiontocomefromhis，“Brothers，whatthefatmanrequiresisnotinreason，norhasitashadowofjusticeinit；because，ifitbetrue，astheysay，thatthechallengedmaychoosetheweapons，theotherhasnorighttochoosesuchaswillpreventandkeephimfromwinning。Mydecision，therefore，isthatthefatchallengerprune，peel，thin，trimandcorrecthimself，andtakeelevenstoneofhisfleshoffhisbody，hereorthere，ashepleases，andassuitshimbest；andbeinginthiswayreducedtoninestoneweight，hewillmakehimselfequalandevenwithninestoneofhisopponent，andtheywillbeabletorunonequalterms。“
　　“Byallthat'sgood，“saidoneofthepeasantsasheheardSancho'sdecision，“butthegentlemanhasspokenlikeasaint，andgivenjudgmentlikeacanon！ButI'llbeboundthefatmanwon'tpartwithanounceofhisflesh，nottosayelevenstone。“
　　“Thebestplanwillbeforthemnottorun，“saidanother，“sothatneitherthethinmanbreakdownundertheweight，northefatonestriphimselfofhisflesh；lethalfthewagerbespentinwine，andlet'stakethesegentlementothetavernwherethere'sthebest，and'overmebethecloakwhenitrains。“
　　“Ithankyou，sirs，“saidDonQuixote；“butIcannotstopforaninstant，forsadthoughtsandunhappycircumstancesforcemetoseemdiscourteousandtotravelapace；“andspurringRocinantehepushedon，leavingthemwonderingatwhattheyhadseenandheard，athisownstrangefigureandattheshrewdnessofhisservant，forsuchtheytookSanchotobe；andanotherofthemobserved，“Iftheservantissoclever，whatmustthemasterbe？I'llbet，iftheyaregoingtoSalamancatostudy，they'llcometobealcaldesoftheCourtinatrice；forit'samerejoke-onlytoreadandread，andhaveinterestandgoodluck；andbeforeamanknowswhereheishefindshimselfwithastaffinhishandoramitreonhishead。“
　　Thatnightmasterandmanpassedoutinthefieldsintheopenair，andthenextdayastheywerepursuingtheirjourneytheysawcomingtowardsthemamanonfootwithalforjasattheneckandajavelinorspikedstaffinhishand，theverycutofafootcourier；
　　who，assoonashecameclosetoDonQuixote，increasedhispaceandhalfrunningcameuptohim，andembracinghisrightthigh，forhecouldreachnohigher，exclaimedwithevidentpleasure，“OSenorDonQuixoteofLaMancha，whathappinessitwillbetotheheartofmylordthedukewhenheknowsyourworshipiscomingbacktohiscastle，forheisstilltherewithmyladytheduchess！”
　　“Idonotrecogniseyou，friend，“saidDonQuixote，“nordoIknowwhoyouare，unlessyoutellme。“
　　“IamTosilos，mylordtheduke'slacquey，SenorDonQuixote，“
　　repliedthecourier；“hewhorefusedtofightyourworshipaboutmarryingthedaughterofDonaRodriguez。“
　　“Godblessme！”exclaimedDonQuixote；“isitpossiblethatyouaretheonewhommineenemiestheenchanterschangedintothelacqueyyouspeakofinordertorobmeofthehonourofthatbattle？”
　　“Nonsense，goodsir！”saidthemessenger；“therewasnoenchantmentortransformationatall；IenteredthelistsjustasmuchlacqueyTosilosasIcameoutofthemlacqueyTosilos。Ithoughttomarrywithoutfighting，forthegirlhadtakenmyfancy；butmyschemehadaverydifferentresult，forassoonasyourworshiphadleftthecastlemylordthedukehadahundredstrokesofthestickgivenmeforhavingactedcontrarytotheordershegavemebeforeengaginginthecombat；andtheendofthewholeaffairisthatthegirlhasbecomeanun，andDonaRodriguezhasgonebacktoCastile，andIamnowonmywaytoBarcelonawithapacketoflettersfortheviceroywhichmymasterissendinghim。Ifyourworshipwouldlikeadrop，soundthoughwarm，Ihaveagourdherefullofthebest，andsomescrapsofTronchoncheesethatwillserveasaprovocativeandwakenerofyourthirstifsobeitisasleep。“
　　“Itaketheoffer，“saidSancho；“nomorecomplimentsaboutit；pourout，goodTosilos，inspiteofalltheenchantersintheIndies。“
　　“Thouartindeedthegreatestgluttonintheworld，Sancho，“saidDonQuixote，“andthegreatestboobyonearth，nottobeabletoseethatthiscourierisenchantedandthisTosilosashamone；stopwithhimandtakethyfill；Iwillgoonslowlyandwaitfortheetocomeupwithme。“
　　Thelacqueylaughed，unsheathedhisgourd，unwallettedhisscraps，andtakingoutasmallloafofbreadheandSanchoseatedthemselvesonthegreengrass，andinpeaceandgoodfellowshipfinishedoffthecontentsofthealforjasdowntothebottom，soresolutelythattheylickedthewrapperoftheletters，merelybecauseitsmeltofcheese。
　　SaidTosilostoSancho，“Beyondadoubt，Sanchomyfriend，thismasterofthineoughttobeamadman。“
　　“Ought！”saidSancho；“heowesnomananything；hepaysforeverything，particularlywhenthecoinismadness。Iseeitplainenough，andItellhimsoplainenough；butwhat'stheuse？especiallynowthatitisalloverwithhim，forhereheisbeatenbytheKnightoftheWhiteMoon。“
　　Tosilosbeggedhimtoexplainwhathadhappenedhim，butSanchorepliedthatitwouldnotbegoodmannerstoleavehismasterwaitingforhim；andthatsomeotherdayiftheymettherewouldbetimeenoughforthat；andthengettingup，aftershakinghisdoubletandbrushingthecrumbsoutofhisbeard，hedroveDappleonbeforehim，andbiddingadieutoTosiloslefthimandrejoinedhismaster，whowaswaitingforhimundertheshadeofatree。
　　CHAPTERLXVII
　　OFTHERESOLUTIONDONQUIXOTEFORMEDTOTURNSHEPHERDANDTAKETO
　　ALIFEINTHEFIELDSWHILETHEYEARFORWHICHHEHADGIVENHISWORD
　　WASRUNNINGITSCOURSE；WITHOTHEREVENTSTRULYDELECTABLEANDHAPPY
　　IFAmultitudeofreflectionsusedtoharassDonQuixotebeforehehadbeenoverthrown，agreatmanymoreharassedhimsincehisfall。Hewasundertheshadeofatree，ashasbeensaid，andthere，likefliesonhoney，thoughtscamecrowdinguponhimandstinginghim。SomeofthemturneduponthedisenchantmentofDulcinea，othersuponthelifehewasabouttoleadinhisenforcedretirement。SanchocameupandspokeinhighpraiseofthegenerousdispositionofthelacqueyTosilos。
　　“Isitpossible，Sancho，“saidDonQuixote，“thatthoudoststillthinkthatheyonderisareallacquey？ApparentlyithasescapedthymemorythatthouhastseenDulcineaturnedandtransformedintoapeasantwench，andtheKnightoftheMirrorsintothebachelorCarrasco；alltheworkoftheenchantersthatpersecuteme。Buttellmenow，didstthouaskthisTosilos，asthoucallesthim，whathasbecomeofAltisidora，didsheweepovermyabsence，orhasshealreadyconsignedtooblivionthelovethoughtsthatusedtoafflictherwhenIwaspresent？”
　　“ThethoughtsthatIhad，“saidSancho，“werenotsuchastoleavetimeforaskingfool'squestions。Bodyo'me，senor！isyourworshipinaconditionnowtoinquireintootherpeople'sthoughts，abovealllovethoughts？”
　　“Lookye，Sancho，“saidDonQuixote，“thereisagreatdifferencebetweenwhatisdoneoutofloveandwhatisdoneoutofgratitude。
　　Aknightmayverypossiblyheproofagainstlove；butitisimpossible，strictlyspeaking，forhimtobeungrateful。Altisidora，toallappearance，lovedmetruly；shegavemethethreekerchiefsthouknowestof；sheweptatmydeparture，shecursedme，sheabusedme，castingshametothewindsshebewailedherselfinpublic；allsignsthatsheadoredme；forthewrathofloversalwaysendsincurses。Ihadnohopestogiveher，nortreasurestoofferher，forminearegiventoDulcinea，andthetreasuresofknights-errantarelikethoseofthefairies，'illusoryanddeceptive；allIcangiveheristheplaceinmymemoryIkeepforher，withoutprejudice，however，tothatwhichIholddevotedtoDulcinea，whomthouartwrongingbythyremissnessinwhippingthyselfandscourgingthatflesh-wouldthatIsawiteatenbywolves-whichwouldratherkeepitselfforthewormsthanforthereliefofthatpoorlady。“
　　“Senor，“repliedSancho，“ifthetruthistobetold，Icannotpersuademyselfthatthewhippingofmybacksidehasanythingtodowiththedisenchantmentoftheenchanted；itislikesaying，'Ifyourheadachesrubointmentonyourknees；'atanyrateI'llmakeboldtoswearthatinallthehistoriesdealingwithknight-errantrythatyourworshiphasreadyouhavenevercomeacrossanybodydisenchantedbywhipping；butwhetherornoI'llwhipmyselfwhenI
　　haveafancyforit，andtheopportunityservesforscourgingmyselfcomfortably。“
　　“Godgrantit，“saidDonQuixote；“andheavengivetheegracetotakeittoheartandowntheobligationthouartundertohelpmylady，whoisthinealso，inasmuchasthouartmine。“
　　Astheypursuedtheirjourneytalkinginthiswaytheycametotheverysamespotwheretheyhadbeentrampledonbythebulls。DonQuixoterecognisedit，andsaidhetoSancho，“ThisisthemeadowwherewecameuponthosegayshepherdessesandgallantshepherdswhoweretryingtoreviveandimitatethepastoralArcadiathere，anideaasnovelasitwashappy，inemulationwhereof，ifsohethoudostapproveofit，Sancho，Iwouldhaveourselvesturnshepherds，atanyrateforthetimeIhavetoliveinretirement。Iwillbuysomeewesandeverythingelserequisiteforthepastoralcalling；and，I
　　underthenameoftheshepherdQuixotizeandthouastheshepherdPanzino，wewillroamthewoodsandgrovesandmeadowssingingsongshere，lamentinginelegiesthere，drinkingofthecrystalwatersofthespringsorlimpidbrooksorflowingrivers。Theoakswillyieldustheirsweetfruitwithbountifulhand，thetrunksofthehardcorktreesaseat，thewillowsshade，therosesperfume，thewidespreadmeadowscarpetstintedwithathousanddyes；theclearpureairwillgiveusbreath，themoonandstarslightenthedarknessofthenightforus，songshallbeourdelight，lamentingourjoy，Apollowillsupplyuswithverses，andlovewithconceitswherebyweshallmakeourselvesfamedforever，notonlyinthisbutinagestocome。“
　　“Egad，“saidSancho，“butthatsortoflifesquares，naycorners，withmynotions；andwhatismorethebachelorSamsonCarrascoandMasterNicholasthebarberwon'thavewellseenitbeforethey'llwanttofollowitandturnshepherdsalongwithus；andGodgrantitmaynotcomeintothecurate'sheadtojointhesheepfoldtoo，he'ssojovialandfondofenjoyinghimself。“
　　“Thouartintherightofit，Sancho，“saidDonQuixote；“andthebachelorSamsonCarrasco，ifheentersthepastoralfraternity，asnodoubthewill，maycallhimselftheshepherdSamsonino，orperhapstheshepherdCarrascon；NicholasthebarbermaycallhimselfNiculoso，asoldBoscanformerlywascalledNemoroso；asforthecurateIdon'tknowwhatnamewecanfittohimunlessitbesomethingderivedfromhistitle，andwecallhimtheshepherdCuriambro。Fortheshepherdesseswhoseloversweshallbe，wecanpicknamesaswewouldpears；andasmylady'snamedoesjustaswellforashepherdess'sasforaprincess's，Ineednottroublemyselftolookforonethatwillsuitherbetter；tothine，Sancho，thoucanstgivewhatnamethouwilt。“
　　“Idon'tmeantogiveheranybutTeresona，“saidSancho，“whichwillgowellwithherstoutnessandwithherownrightname，assheiscalledTeresa；andthenwhenIsingherpraisesinmyversesI'llshowhowchastemypassionis，forI'mnotgoingtolook'forbetterbreadthanevercamefromwheat'inothermen'shouses。Itwon'tdoforthecuratetohaveashepherdess，forthesakeofgoodexample；
　　andifthebachelorchoosestohaveone，thatishislook-out。“
　　“Godblessme，Sanchomyfriend！”saidDonQuixote，“whatalifeweshalllead！WhathautboysandZamorabagpipesweshallhear，whattabors，timbrels，andrebecks！Andthenifamongallthesedifferentsortsofmusicthatofthealboguesisheard，almostallthepastoralinstrumentswillbethere。“
　　“Whatarealbogues？”askedSancho，“forIneverinmylifeheardtellofthemorsawthem。“
　　“Albogues，“saidDonQuixote，“arebrassplateslikecandlesticksthatstruckagainstoneanotheronthehollowsidemakeanoisewhich，ifnotverypleasingorharmonious，isnotdisagreeableandaccordsverywellwiththerudenotesofthebagpipeandtabor。ThewordalbogueisMorisco，asareallthoseinourSpanishtonguethatbeginwithal；forexample，almohaza，almorzar，alhombra，alguacil，alhucema，almacen，alcancia，andothersofthesamesort，ofwhichtherearenotmanymore；ourlanguagehasonlythreethatareMoriscoandendini，whichareborcegui，zaquizami，andmaravedi。
　　AlheliandalfaquiareseentobeArabic，aswellbythealatthebeginningasbythetheyendwith。Imentionthisincidentally，thechanceallusiontoalbogueshavingremindedmeofit；anditwillbeofgreatassistancetousintheperfectpracticeofthiscallingthatIamsomethingofapoet，asthouknowest，andthatbesidesthebachelorSamsonCarrascoisanaccomplishedone。OfthecurateIsaynothing；butIwillwagerhehassomespiceofthepoetinhim，andnodoubtMasterNicholastoo，forallbarbers，ormostofthem，areguitarplayersandstringersofverses。Iwillbewailmyseparation；
　　thoushaltglorifythyselfasaconstantlover；theshepherdCarrasconwillfigureasarejectedone，andthecurateCuriambroaswhatevermaypleasehimbest；andsoallwillgoasgailyasheartcouldwish。“
　　TothisSanchomadeanswer，“Iamsounlucky，senor，thatI'mafraidthedaywillnevercomewhenI'llseemyselfatsuchacalling。OwhatneatspoonsI'llmakewhenI'mashepherd！Whatmesses，creams，garlands，pastoraloddsandends！Andiftheydon'tgetmeanameforwisdom，they'llnotfailtogetmeoneforingenuity。MydaughterSanchicawillbringusourdinnertothepasture。Butstay-
　　she'sgood-looking，andshepherdstherearewithmoremischiefthansimplicityinthem；Iwouldnothaveher'comeforwoolandgobackshorn；'love-makingandlawlessdesiresarejustascommoninthefieldsasinthecities，andinshepherds'shantiesasinroyalpalaces；'doawaywiththecause，youdoawaywiththesin；''ifeyesdon'tseeheartsdon'tbreak'and'betteraclearescapethangoodmen'sprayers。'“
　　“Atrucetothyproverbs，Sancho，“exclaimedDonQuixote；“anyoneofthosethouhastutteredwouldsufficetoexplainthymeaning；
　　manyatimehaveIrecommendedtheenottobesolavishwithproverbsandtoexercisesomemoderationindeliveringthem；butitseemstomeitisonly'preachinginthedesert；''mymotherbeatsmeandIgoonwithmytricks。“
　　“Itseemstome，“saidSancho，“thatyourworshipislikethecommonsaying，'Saidthefrying-pantothekettle，Getaway，blackbreech。'
　　Youchidemeforutteringproverbs，andyoustringthemincouplesyourself。“
　　“Observe，Sancho，“repliedDonQuixote，“Ibringinproverbstothepurpose，andwhenIquotethemtheyfitlikearingtothefinger；
　　thoubringesttheminbytheheadandshoulders，insuchawaythatthoudostdragthemin，ratherthanintroducethem；ifIamnotmistaken，Ihavetoldtheealreadythatproverbsareshortmaximsdrawnfromtheexperienceandobservationofourwisemenofold；
　　buttheproverbthatisnottothepurposeisapieceofnonsenseandnotamaxim。Butenoughofthis；asnightfallisdrawingonletusretiresomelittledistancefromthehighroadtopassthenight；whatisinstoreforusto-morrowGodknoweth。“
　　Theyturnedaside，andsuppedlateandpoorly，verymuchagainstSancho'swill，whoturnedoverinhismindthehardshipsattendantuponknight-errantryinwoodsandforests，eventhoughattimesplentypresenteditselfincastlesandhouses，asatDonDiegodeMiranda's，attheweddingofCamachotheRich，andatDonAntonioMoreno's；hereflected，however，thatitcouldnotbealwaysday，noralwaysnight；andsothatnighthepassedinsleeping，andhismasterinwaking。
　　CHAPTERLXVIII
　　OFTHEBRISTLYADVENTURETHATBEFELLDONQUIXOTE
　　THEnightwassomewhatdark，forthoughtherewasamoonintheskyitwasnotinaquarterwhereshecouldbeseen；forsometimestheladyDianagoesonastrolltotheantipodes，andleavesthemountainsallblackandthevalleysindarkness。DonQuixoteobeyednaturesofarastosleephisfirstsleep，butdidnotgivewaytothesecond，verydifferentfromSancho，whoneverhadanysecond，becausewithhimsleeplastedfromnighttillmorning，whereinheshowedwhatasoundconstitutionandfewcareshehad。DonQuixote'scareskepthimrestless，somuchsothatheawokeSanchoandsaidtohim，“Iamamazed，Sancho，attheunconcernofthytemperament。Ibelievethouartmadeofmarbleorhardbrass，incapableofanyemotionorfeelingwhatever。Ilieawakewhilethousleepest，Iweepwhilethousingest，Iamfaintwithfastingwhilethouartsluggishandtorpidfrompurerepletion。Itisthedutyofgoodservantstosharethesufferingsandfeelthesorrowsoftheirmasters，ifitbeonlyforthesakeofappearances。Seethecalmnessofthenight，thesolitudeofthespot，invitingustobreakourslumbersbyavigilofsomesort。Riseasthoulivest，andretirealittledistance，andwithagoodheartandcheerfulcouragegivethyselfthreeorfourhundredlashesonaccountofDulcinea'sdisenchantmentscore；andthisI
　　entreatofthee，makingitarequest，forIhavenodesiretocometogripswiththeeasecondtime，asIknowthouhastaheavyhand。Assoonasthouhastlaidthemonwewillpasstherestofthenight，I
　　singingmyseparation，thouthyconstancy，makingabeginningatoncewiththepastorallifewearetofollowatourvillage。“
　　“Senor，“repliedSancho，“I'mnomonktogetupoutofthemiddleofmysleepandscourgemyself，nordoesitseemtomethatonecanpassfromoneextremeofthepainofwhippingtotheotherofmusic。
　　Willyourworshipletmesleep，andnotworrymeaboutwhippingmyself？oryou'llmakemeswearnevertotouchahairofmydoublet，nottosaymyflesh。“
　　“Ohardheart！”saidDonQuixote，“Opitilesssquire！Obreadill-bestowedandfavoursill-acknowledged，boththoseIhavedonetheeandthoseImeantodothee！Throughmehastthouseenthyselfagovernor，andthroughmethouseestthyselfinimmediateexpectationofbeingacount，orobtainingsomeotherequivalenttitle，forI-
　　posttenebrassperolucem。“
　　“Idon'tknowwhatthatis，“saidSancho；“allIknowisthatsolongasIamasleepIhaveneitherfearnorhope，troublenorglory；
　　andgoodluckbetidehimthatinventedsleep，thecloakthatcoversoverallaman'sthoughts，thefoodthatremoveshunger，thedrinkthatdrivesawaythirst，thefirethatwarmsthecold，thecoldthattemperstheheat，and，towindupwith，theuniversalcoinwherewitheverythingisbought，theweightandbalancethatmakestheshepherdequalwiththekingandthefoolwiththewiseman。Sleep，Ihaveheardsay，hasonlyonefault，thatitislikedeath；forbetweenasleepingmanandadeadmanthereisverylittledifference。“
　　“NeverhaveIheardtheespeaksoelegantlyasnow，Sancho，“saidDonQuixote；“andhereIbegintoseethetruthoftheproverbthoudostsometimesquote，'Notwithwhomthouartbred，butwithwhomthouartfed。'“
　　“Ha，bymylife，mastermine，“saidSancho，“it'snotIthatamstringingproverbsnow，fortheydropinpairsfromyourworship'smouthfasterthanfrommine；onlythereisthisdifferencebetweenmineandyours，thatyoursarewell-timedandmineareuntimely；butanyhow，theyareallproverbs。“
　　Atthispointtheybecameawareofaharshindistinctnoisethatseemedtospreadthroughallthevalleysaround。DonQuixotestoodupandlaidhishanduponhissword，andSanchoensconcedhimselfunderDappleandputthebundleofarmourononesideofhimandtheass'spack-saddleontheother，infearandtremblingasgreatasDonQuixote'sperturbation。Eachinstantthenoiseincreasedandcamenearertothetwoterrifiedmen，oratleasttoone，forastotheother，hiscourageisknowntoall。Thefactofthematterwasthatsomemenweretakingabovesixhundredpigstosellatafair，andwereontheirwaywiththematthathour，andsogreatwasthenoisetheymadeandtheirgruntingandblowing，thattheydeafenedtheearsofDonQuixoteandSanchoPanza，andtheycouldnotmakeoutwhatitwas。Thewide-spreadgruntingdrovecameoninasurgingmass，andwithoutshowinganyrespectforDonQuixote'sdignityorSancho's，passedrightoverthepairofthem，demolishingSancho'sentrenchments，andnotonlyupsettingDonQuixotebutsweepingRocinanteoffhisfeetintothebargain；andwhatwiththetramplingandthegrunting，andthepaceatwhichtheuncleanbeastswent，pack-saddle，armour，DappleandRocinantewereleftscatteredonthegroundandSanchoandDonQuixoteattheirwits'end。
　　Sanchogotupaswellashecouldandbeggedhismastertogivehimhissword，sayinghewantedtokillhalfadozenofthosedirtyunmannerlypigs，forhehadbythistimefoundoutthatthatwaswhattheywere。
　　“Letthembe，myfriend，“saidDonQuixote；“thisinsultisthepenaltyofmysin；anditistherighteouschastisementofheaventhatjackalsshoulddevouravanquishedknight，andwaspsstinghimandpigstramplehimunderfoot。“
　　“Isupposeitisthechastisementofheaven，too，“saidSancho，“thatfliesshouldprickthesquiresofvanquishedknights，andliceeatthem，andhungerassailthem。Ifwesquireswerethesonsoftheknightsweserve，ortheirverynearrelations，itwouldbenowonderifthepenaltyoftheirmisdeedsovertookus，eventothefourthgeneration。ButwhathavethePanzastodowiththeQuixotes？
　　Well，well，let'sliedownagainandsleepoutwhatlittleofthenightthere'sleft，andGodwillsendusdawnandweshallbeallright。“
　　“Sleepthou，Sancho，“returnedDonQuixote，“forthouwastborntosleepasIwasborntowatch；andduringthetimeitnowwantsofdawnIwillgivealoosereintomythoughts，andseekaventfortheminalittlemadrigalwhich，unknowntothee，Icomposedinmyheadlastnight。“
　　“Ishouldthink，“saidSancho，“thatthethoughtsthatallowonetomakeversescannotbeofgreatconsequence；letyourworshipstringversesasmuchasyoulikeandI'llsleepasmuchasIcan；“andforthwith，takingthespaceofgroundherequired，hemuffledhimselfupandfellintoasoundsleep，undisturbedbybond，debt，ortroubleofanysort。DonQuixote，proppedupagainstthetrunkofabeechoracorktree-forCideHametedoesnotspecifywhatkindoftreeitwas-sanginthisstraintotheaccompanimentofhisownsighs：
　　WheninmymindImuse，OLove，uponthycruelty，TodeathIflee，Inhopethereintheendofalltofind。
　　ButdrawingnearThatwelcomehaveninmyseaofwoe，SuchjoyIknow，Thatliferevives，andstillIlingerhere。
　　Thuslifedothslay，Anddeathagaintoliferestorethme；
　　Strangedestiny，Thatdealswithlifeanddeathaswithaplay！
　　Heaccompaniedeachversewithmanysighsandnotafewtears，justlikeonewhoseheartwaspiercedwithgriefathisdefeatandhisseparationfromDulcinea。
　　Andnowdaylightcame，andthesunsmoteSanchoontheeyeswithhisbeams。Heawoke，rousedhimselfup，shookhimselfandstretchedhislazylimbs，andseeingthehavocthepigshadmadewithhisstoreshecursedthedrove，andmorebesides。Thenthepairresumedtheirjourney，andaseveningclosedintheysawcomingtowardsthemsometenmenonhorsebackandfourorfiveonfoot。DonQuixote'sheartbeatquickandSancho'squailedwithfear，forthepersonsapproachingthemcarriedlancesandbucklers，andwereinverywarlikeguise。
　　DonQuixoteturnedtoSanchoandsaid，“IfIcouldmakeuseofmyweapons，andmypromisehadnottiedmyhands，Iwouldcountthishostthatcomesagainstusbutcakesandfancybread；butperhapsitmayprovesomethingdifferentfromwhatweapprehend。“Themenonhorsebacknowcameup，andraisingtheirlancessurroundedDonQuixoteinsilence，andpointedthemathisbackandbreast，menacinghimwithdeath。Oneofthoseonfoot，puttinghisfingertohislipsasasigntohimtobesilent，seizedRocinante'sbridleanddrewhimoutoftheroad，andtheothersdrivingSanchoandDapplebeforethem，andallmaintainingastrangesilence，followedinthestepsoftheonewholedDonQuixote。Thelattertwoorthreetimesattemptedtoaskwheretheyweretakinghimtoandwhattheywanted，buttheinstanthebegantoopenhislipstheythreatenedtoclosethemwiththepointsoftheirlances；andSanchofaredthesameway，forthemomentheseemedabouttospeakoneofthoseonfootpunchedhimwithagoad，andDapplelikewise，asifhetoowantedtotalk。Nightsetin，theyquickenedtheirpace，andthefearsofthetwoprisonersgrewgreater，especiallyastheyheardthemselvesassailedwith-“Geton，yeTroglodytes；““Silence，yebarbarians；““March，yecannibals；““Nomurmuring，yeScythians；““Don'topenyoureyes，yemurderousPolyphemes，yeblood-thirstylions，“andsuchlikenameswithwhichtheircaptorsharassedtheearsofthewretchedmasterandman。Sanchowentalongsayingtohimself，“We，tortolites，barbers，animals！I
　　don'tlikethosenamesatall；'it'sinabadwindourcornisbeingwinnowed；''misfortunecomesuponusallatoncelikesticksonadog，'andGodgrantitmaybenoworsethanthemthatthisunluckyadventurehasinstoreforus。“
　　DonQuixoterodecompletelydazed，unablewiththeaidofallhiswitstomakeoutwhatcouldbethemeaningoftheseabusivenamestheycalledthem，andtheonlyconclusionhecouldarriveatwasthattherewasnogoodtobehopedforandmucheviltobefeared。Andnow，aboutanhouraftermidnight，theyreachedacastlewhichDonQuixotesawatoncewastheduke's，wheretheyhadbeenbutashorttimebefore。“Godblessme！”saidhe，asherecognisedthemansion，“whatdoesthismean？Itisallcourtesyandpolitenessinthishouse；butwiththevanquishedgoodturnsintoevil，andevilintoworse。“
　　Theyenteredthechiefcourtofthecastleandfounditpreparedandfittedupinastylethataddedtotheiramazementanddoubledtheirfears，aswillbeseeninthefollowingchapter。
　　CHAPTERLXIX
　　OFTHESTRANGESTANDMOSTEXTRAORDINARYADVENTURETHATBEFELLDON
　　QUIXOTEINTHEWHOLECOURSEOFTHISGREATHISTORY
　　THEhorsemendismounted，and，togetherwiththemenonfoot，withoutamoment'sdelaytakingupSanchoandDonQuixotebodily，theycarriedthemintothecourt，allroundwhichnearahundredtorchesfixedinsocketswereburning，besidesabovefivehundredlampsinthecorridors，sothatinspiteofthenight，whichwassomewhatdark，thewantofdaylightcouldnotbeperceived。Inthemiddleofthecourtwasacatafalque，raisedabouttwoyardsabovethegroundandcoveredcompletelybyanimmensecanopyofblackvelvet，andonthestepsallrounditwhitewaxtapersburnedinmorethanahundredsilvercandlesticks。Uponthecatafalquewasseenthedeadbodyofadamselsolovelythatbyherbeautyshemadedeathitselflookbeautiful。Shelaywithherheadrestinguponacushionofbrocadeandcrownedwithagarlandofsweet-smellingflowersofdiverssorts，herhandscrosseduponherbosom，andbetweenthemabranchofyellowpalmofvictory。Ononesideofthecourtwaserectedastage，whereupontwochairswereseatedtwopersonswhofromhavingcrownsontheirheadsandsceptresintheirhandsappearedtobekingsofsomesort，whetherrealormockones。Bythesideofthisstage，whichwasreachedbysteps，weretwootherchairsonwhichthemencarryingtheprisonersseatedDonQuixoteandSancho，allinsilence，andbysignsgivingthemtounderstandthattheytooweretohesilent；which，however，theywouldhavebeenwithoutanysigns，fortheiramazementatalltheysawheldthemtongue-tied。
　　Andnowtwopersonsofdistinction，whowereatoncerecognisedbyDonQuixoteashishoststhedukeandduchess，ascendedthestageattendedbyanumeroussuite，andseatedthemselvesontwogorgeouschairsclosetothetwokings，astheyseemedtobe。Whowouldnothavebeenamazedatthis？Norwasthisall，forDonQuixotehadperceivedthatthedeadbodyonthecatafalquewasthatofthefairAltisidora。AsthedukeandduchessmountedthestageDonQuixoteandSanchoroseandmadethemaprofoundobeisance，whichtheyreturnedbybowingtheirheadsslightly。Atthismomentanofficialcrossedover，andapproachingSanchothrewoverhimarobeofblackbuckrampaintedalloverwithflamesoffire，andtakingoffhiscapputuponhisheadamitresuchasthoseundergoingthesentenceoftheHolyOfficewear；andwhisperedinhisearthathemustnotopenhislips，ortheywouldputagaguponhim，ortakehislife。Sanchosurveyedhimselffromheadtofootandsawhimselfallablazewithflames；butastheydidnotburnhim，hedidnotcaretwofarthingsforthem。Hetookoffthemitreandseeingpaintedwithdevilsheputitonagain，sayingtohimself，“Well，sofarthosedon'tburnmenordothesecarrymeoff。“DonQuixotesurveyedhimtoo，andthoughfearhadgotthebetterofhisfaculties，hecouldnothelpsmilingtoseethefigureSanchopresented。Andnowfromunderneaththecatafalque，soitseemed，thererosealowsweetsoundofflutes，which，comingunbrokenbyhumanvoicefortheresilenceitselfkeptsilence，hadasoftandlanguishingeffect。Then，besidethepillowofwhatseemedtobethedeadbody，suddenlyappearedafairyouthinaRomanhabit，who，totheaccompanimentofaharpwhichhehimselfplayed，sanginasweetandclearvoicethesetwostanzas：
　　WhilefairAltisidora，whothesportOfcoldDonQuixote'scrueltyhathbeen，Returnstolife，andinthismagiccourtThedamesinsablescometogracethescene，AndwhilehermatronsallinseemlysortMyladyrobesinbaizeandbombazine，HerbeautyandhersorrowswillIsingWithdefterquillthantouchedtheThracianstring。
　　Butnotinlifealone，methinks，tomeBelongstheoffice；Lady，whenmytongueIscoldindeath，believeme，untotheeMyvoiceshallraiseitstributarysong。
　　Mysoul，fromthisstraitprison-housesetfree，Aso'ertheStygianlakeitfloatsalong，Thypraisessingingstillshallholditsway，Andmakethewatersofoblivionstay。
　　Atthispointoneofthetwothatlookedlikekingsexclaimed，“Enough，enough，divinesinger！ItwouldbeanendlesstasktoputbeforeusnowthedeathandthecharmsofthepeerlessAltisidora，notdeadastheignorantworldimagines，butlivinginthevoiceoffameandinthepenancewhichSanchoPanza，herepresent，hastoundergotorestorehertothelong-lostlight。Dothou，therefore，O
　　Rhadamanthus，whosittestinjudgmentwithmeinthemurkycavernsofDis，asthouknowestallthattheinscrutablefateshavedecreedtouchingtheresuscitationofthisdamsel，announceanddeclareitatonce，thatthehappinesswelookforwardtofromherrestorationbenolongerdeferred。“
　　NosoonerhadMinosthefellowjudgeofRhadamanthussaidthis，thanRhadamanthusrisingupsaid：
　　“Ho，officialsofthishouse，highandlow，greatandsmall，makehastehitheroneandall，andprintonSancho'sfacefour-and-twentysmacks，andgivehimtwelvepinchesandsixpinthrustsinthebackandarms；foruponthisceremonydependstherestorationofAltisidora。“
　　OnhearingthisSanchobrokesilenceandcriedout，“Byallthat'sgood，I'llassoonletmyfacebesmackedorhandledasturnMoor。
　　Bodyo'me！Whathashandlingmyfacegottodowiththeresurrectionofthisdamsel？'Theoldwomantookkindlytotheblits；theyenchantDulcinea，andwhipmeinordertodisenchanther；AltisidoradiesofailmentsGodwaspleasedtosendher，andtobringhertolifeagaintheymustgivemefour-and-twentysmacks，andprickholesinmybodywithpins，andraisewealsonmyarmswithpinches！Trythosejokesonabrother-in-law；'I'manolddog，and“tus，tus“isnousewithme。'“
　　“Thoushaltdie，“saidRhadamanthusinaloudvoice；“relent，thoutiger；humblethyself，proudNimrod；sufferandhesilent，fornoimpossibilitiesareaskedofthee；itisnotfortheetoinquireintothedifficultiesinthismatter；smackedthoumustbe，prickedthoushaltseethyself，andwithpinchesthoumustbemadetohowl。
　　Ho，Isay，officials，obeymyorders；orbythewordofanhonestman，yeshallseewhatyewerebornfor。“
　　Atthissomesixduennas，advancingacrossthecourt，madetheirappearanceinprocession，oneaftertheother，fourofthemwithspectacles，andallwiththeirrighthandsuplifted，showingfourfingersofwristtomaketheirhandslooklonger，asisthefashionnow-a-days。NosoonerhadSanchocaughtsightofthemthan，bellowinglikeabull，heexclaimed，“Imightletmyselfbehandledbyalltheworld；butallowduennastotouchme-notabitofit！Scratchmyface，asmymasterwasservedinthisverycastle；runmethroughthebodywithburnisheddaggers；pinchmyarmswithred-hotpincers；
　　I'llbearallinpatiencetoservethesegentlefolk；butIwon'tletduennastouchme，thoughthedevilshouldcarrymeoff！”
　　HereDonQuixote，too，brokesilence，sayingtoSancho，“Havepatience，myson，andgratifythesenoblepersons，andgiveallthankstoheaventhatithasinfusedsuchvirtueintothyperson，thatbyitssufferingsthoucanstdisenchanttheenchantedandrestoretolifethedead。“
　　TheduennaswerenowclosetoSancho，andhe，havingbecomemoretractableandreasonable，settlinghimselfwellinhischairpresentedhisfaceandbeardtothefirst，whodeliveredhimasmackverystoutlylaidon，andthenmadehimalowcurtsey。
　　“Lesspolitenessandlesspaint，senoraduenna，“saidSancho；“byGodyourhandssmellofvinegar-wash。“
　　Infine，alltheduennassmackedhimandseveralothersofthehouseholdpinchedhim；butwhathecouldnotstandwasbeingprickedbythepins；andso，apparentlyoutofpatience，hestartedupoutofhischair，andseizingalightedtorchthatstoodnearhimfellupontheduennasandthewholesetofhistormentors，exclaiming，“Begone，yeministersofhell；I'mnotmadeofbrassnottofeelsuchout-of-the-waytortures。“
　　AtthisinstantAltisidora，whoprobablywastiredofhavingbeensolonglyingonherback，turnedonherside；seeingwhichthebystanderscriedoutalmostwithonevoice，“Altisidoraisalive！
　　Altisidoralives！”
　　RhadamanthusbadeSanchoputawayhiswrath，astheobjecttheyhadinviewwasnowattained。WhenDonQuixotesawAltisidoramove，hewentonhiskneestoSanchosayingtohim，“Nowisthetime，sonofmybowels，nottocalltheemysquire，fortheetogivethyselfsomeofthoselashesthouartboundtolayonforthedisenchantmentofDulcinea。Now，Isay，isthetimewhenthevirtuethatisintheeisripe，andendowedwithefficacytoworkthegoodthatislookedforfromthee。“
　　TowhichSanchomadeanswer，“That'strickupontrick，Ithink，andnothoneyuponpancakes；anicethingitwouldbeforawhippingtocomenow，onthetopofpinches，smacks，andpin-proddings！Youhadbettertakeabigstoneandtieitroundmyneck，andpitchmeintoawell；Ishouldnotminditmuch，ifI'mtobealwaysmadethecowoftheweddingforthecureofotherpeople'sailments。Leavemealone；
　　orelsebyGodI'llflingthewholethingtothedogs，letcomewhatmay。“
　　Altisidorahadbythistimesatuponthecatafalque，andasshedidsotheclarionssounded，accompaniedbytheflutes，andthevoicesofallpresentexclaiming，“LonglifetoAltisidora！longlifetoAltisidora！”ThedukeandduchessandthekingsMinosandRhadamanthusstoodup，andall，togetherwithDonQuixoteandSancho，advancedtoreceiveherandtakeherdownfromthecatafalque；andshe，makingasthoughshewererecoveringfromaswoon，bowedherheadtothedukeandduchessandtothekings，andlookingsidewaysatDonQuixote，saidtohim，“Godforgivethee，insensibleknight，forthroughthycrueltyIhavebeen，tomeitseems，morethanathousandyearsintheotherworld；andtothee，themostcompassionateuponearth，I
　　renderthanksforthelifeIamnowinpossessionof。Fromthisdayforth，friendSancho，countasthinesixsmocksofminewhichIbestowuponthee，tomakeasmanyshirtsforthyself，andiftheyarenotallquitewhole，atanyratetheyareallclean。“
　　Sanchokissedherhandsingratitude，kneeling，andwiththemitreinhishand。Thedukebadethemtakeitfromhim，andgivehimbackhiscapanddoubletandremovetheflamingrobe。Sanchobeggedtheduketoletthemleavehimtherobeandmitre；ashewantedtotakethemhomeforatokenandmementoofthatunexampledadventure。Theduchesssaidtheymustleavethemwithhim；forheknewalreadywhatagreatfriendofhisshewas。Thedukethengaveordersthatthecourtshouldbecleared，andthatallshouldretiretotheirchambers，andthatDonQuixoteandSanchoshouldbeconductedtotheiroldquarters。
　　CHAPTERLXX
　　WHICHFOLLOWSSIXTY-NINEANDDEALSWITHMATTERSINDISPENSABLEFOR
　　THECLEARCOMPREHENSIONOFTHISHISTORY
　　SANCHOsleptthatnightinacotinthesamechamberwithDonQuixote，athinghewouldhavegladlyexcusedifhecouldforheknewverywellthatwithquestionsandanswershismasterwouldnotlethimsleep，andhewasinnohumourfortalkingmuch，ashestillfeltthepainofhislatemartyrdom，whichinterferedwithhisfreedomofspeech；anditwouldhavebeenmoretohistastetosleepinahovelalone，thaninthatluxuriouschamberincompany。Andsowellfoundeddidhisapprehensionprove，andsocorrectwashisanticipation，thatscarcelyhadhismastergotintobedwhenhesaid，“Whatdostthouthinkoftonight'sadventure，Sancho？Greatandmightyisthepowerofcold-heartedscorn，forthouwiththineowneyeshastseenAltisidoraslain，notbyarrows，norbythesword，norbyanywarlikeweapon，norbydeadlypoisons，butbythethoughtofthesternnessandscornwithwhichIhavealwaystreatedher。“
　　“Shemighthavediedandwelcome，“saidSancho，“whenshepleasedandhowshepleased；andshemighthaveleftmealone，forInevermadeherfallinloveorscornedher。Idon'tknownorcanIimaginehowtherecoveryofAltisidora，adamselmorefancifulthanwise，canhave，asIhavesaidbefore，anythingtodowiththesufferingsofSanchoPanza。NowIbegintoseeplainlyandclearlythatthereareenchantersandenchantedpeopleintheworld；andmayGoddelivermefromthem，sinceIcan'tdelivermyself；andsoIbegofyourworshiptoletmesleepandnotaskmeanymorequestions，unlessyouwantmetothrowmyselfoutofthewindow。“
　　“Sleep，Sanchomyfriend，“saidDonQuixote，“ifthepinproddingandpinchesthouhastreceivedandthesmacksadministeredtotheewillletthee。“
　　“Nopaincameuptotheinsultofthesmacks，“saidSancho，“forthesimplereasonthatitwasduennas，confoundthem，thatgavethemtome；butoncemoreIentreatyourworshiptoletmesleep，forsleepisrelieffrommiserytothosewhoaremiserablewhenawake。“
　　“Beitso，andGodbewiththee，“saidDonQuixote。
　　Theyfellasleep，bothofthem，andCideHamete，theauthorofthisgreathistory，tookthisopportunitytorecordandrelatewhatitwasthatinducedthedukeandduchesstogetuptheelaborateplotthathasbeendescribed。ThebachelorSamsonCarrasco，hesays，notforgettinghowheastheKnightoftheMirrorshadbeenvanquishedandoverthrownbyDonQuixote，whichdefeatandoverthrowupsetallhisplans，resolvedtotryhishandagain，hopingforbetterluckthanhehadbefore；andso，havinglearnedwhereDonQuixotewasfromthepagewhobroughttheletterandpresenttoSancho'swife，TeresaPanza，hegothimselfnewarmourandanotherhorse，andputawhitemoonuponhisshield，andtocarryhisarmshehadamuleledbyapeasant，notbyTomCecialhisformersquireforfearheshouldberecognisedbySanchoorDonQuixote。Hecametotheduke'scastle，andthedukeinformedhimoftheroadandrouteDonQuixotehadtakenwiththeintentionofbeingpresentatthejoustsatSaragossa。Hetoldhim，too，ofthejokeshehadpractiseduponhim，andofthedeviceforthedisenchantmentofDulcineaattheexpenseofSancho'sbackside；andfinallyhegavehimanaccountofthetrickSanchohadplayeduponhismaster，makinghimbelievethatDulcineawasenchantedandturnedintoacountrywench；andofhowtheduchess，hiswife，hadpersuadedSanchothatitwashehimselfwhowasdeceived，inasmuchasDulcineawasreallyenchanted；atwhichthebachelorlaughednotalittle，andmarvelledaswellatthesharpnessandsimplicityofSanchoasatthelengthtowhichDonQuixote'smadnesswent。Thedukebeggedofhimifhefoundhimwhetherheovercamehimornottoreturnthatwayandlethimknowtheresult。Thisthebachelordid；hesetoutinquestofDonQuixote，andnotfindinghimatSaragossa，hewenton，andhowhefaredhasbeenalreadytold。Hereturnedtotheduke'scastleandtoldhimall，whattheconditionsofthecombatwere，andhowDonQuixotewasnow，likealoyalknight-errant，returningtokeephispromiseofretiringtohisvillageforayear，bywhichtime，saidthebachelor，hemightperhapsbecuredofhismadness；forthatwastheobjectthathadledhimtoadoptthesedisguises，asitwasasadthingforagentlemanofsuchgoodpartsasDonQuixotetobeamadman。Andsohetookhisleaveoftheduke，andwenthometohisvillagetowaitthereforDonQuixote，whowascomingafterhim。Thereuponthedukeseizedtheopportunityofpractisingthismystificationuponhim；somuchdidheenjoyeverythingconnectedwithSanchoandDonQuixote。Hehadtheroadsaboutthecastlefarandnear，everywherehethoughtDonQuixotewaslikelytopassonhisreturn，occupiedbylargenumbersofhisservantsonfootandonhorseback，whoweretobringhimtothecastle，byfairmeansorfoul，iftheymethim。Theydidmeethim，andsentwordtotheduke，who，havingalreadysettledwhatwastobedone，assoonasheheardofhisarrival，orderedthetorchesandlampsinthecourttobelitandAltisidoratobeplacedonthecatafalquewithallthepompandceremonythathasbeendescribed，thewholeaffairbeingsowellarrangedandactedthatitdifferedbutlittlefromreality。AndCideHametesays，moreover，thatforhispartheconsiderstheconcoctersofthejokeascrazyasthevictimsofit，andthatthedukeandduchesswerenottwofingers'breadthremovedfrombeingsomethinglikefoolsthemselveswhentheytooksuchpainstomakegameofapairoffools。
　　Asforthelatter，onewassleepingsoundlyandtheotherlyingawakeoccupiedwithhisdesultorythoughts，whendaylightcametothembringingwithitthedesiretorise；forthelazydownwasneveradelighttoDonQuixote，victororvanquished。Altisidora，comebackfromdeathtolifeasDonQuixotefancied，followingupthefreakofherlordandlady，enteredthechamber，crownedwiththegarlandshehadwornonthecatafalqueandinarobeofwhitetaffetaembroideredwithgoldflowers，herhairflowinglooseoverhershoulders，andleaninguponastaffoffineblackebony。DonQuixote，disconcertedandinconfusionatherappearance，huddledhimselfupandwell-nighcoveredhimselfaltogetherwiththesheetsandcounterpaneofthebed，tongue-tied，andunabletoofferheranycivility。Altisidoraseatedherselfonachairattheheadofthebed，and，afteradeepsigh，saidtohiminafeeble，softvoice，“Whenwomenofrankandmodestmaidenstramplehonourunderfoot，andgivealoosetothetonguethatbreaksthrougheveryimpediment，publishingabroadtheinmostsecretsoftheirhearts，theyarereducedtosoreextremities。SuchaoneamI，SenorDonQuixoteofLaMancha，crushed，conquered，love-smitten，butyetpatientundersufferingandvirtuous，andsomuchsothatmyheartbrokewithgriefandIlostmylife。
　　ForthelasttwodaysIhavebeendead，slainbythethoughtofthecrueltywithwhichthouhasttreatedme，obdurateknight，Oharderthouthanmarbletomyplaint；
　　oratleastbelievedtobedeadbyallwhosawme；andhaditnotbeenthatLove，takingpityonme，letmyrecoveryrestuponthesufferingsofthisgoodsquire，thereIshouldhaveremainedintheotherworld。“
　　“Lovemightverywellhaveletitrestuponthesufferingsofmyass，andIshouldhavebeenobligedtohim，“saidSancho。“Buttellme，senora-andmayheavensendyouatendererloverthanmymaster-
　　whatdidyouseeintheotherworld？Whatgoesoninhell？Forofcoursethat'swhereonewhodiesindespairisboundfor。“
　　“Totellyouthetruth，“saidAltisidora，“Icannothavediedoutright，forIdidnotgointohell；hadIgonein，itisverycertainIshouldneverhavecomeoutagain，dowhatImight。Thetruthis，Icametothegate，wheresomedozenorsoofdevilswereplayingtennis，allinbreechesanddoublets，withfallingcollarstrimmedwithFlemishbonelace，andrufflesofthesamethatservedthemforwristbands，withfourfingers'breadthofthearmsexposedtomaketheirhandslooklonger；intheirhandstheyheldracketsoffire；butwhatamazedmestillmorewasthatbooks，apparentlyfullofwindandrubbish，servedthemfortennisballs，astrangeandmarvellousthing；this，however，didnotastonishmesomuchastoobservethat，althoughwithplayersitisusualforthewinnerstobegladandtheloserssorry，thereinthatgameallweregrowling，allweresnarling，andallwerecursingoneanother。““That'snowonder，“saidSancho；“fordevils，whetherplayingornot，canneverbecontent，winorlose。“
　　“Verylikely，“saidAltisidora；“butthereisanotherthingthatsurprisesmetoo，Imeansurprisedmethen，andthatwasthatnoballoutlastedthefirstthroworwasofanyuseasecondtime；anditwaswonderfultheconstantsuccessiontherewasofbooks，newandold。
　　Tooneofthem，abrand-new，well-boundone，theygavesuchastrokethattheyknockedthegutsoutofitandscatteredtheleavesabout。
　　'Lookwhatbookthatis，'saidonedeviltoanother，andtheotherreplied，'Itisthe“SecondPartoftheHistoryofDonQuixoteofLaMancha，“notbyCideHamete，theoriginalauthor，butbyanAragonesewhobyhisownaccountisofTordesillas。''Outofthiswithit，'saidthefirst，'andintothedepthsofhellwithitoutofmysight。''Isitsobad？'saidtheother。'Sobadisit，'saidthefirst，'thatifIhadsetmyselfdeliberatelytomakeaworse，Icouldnothavedoneit。'Theythenwentonwiththeirgame，knockingotherbooksabout；andI，havingheardthemmentionthenameofDonQuixotewhomIloveandadoreso，tookcaretoretainthisvisioninmymemory。“
　　“Avisionitmusthavebeen，nodoubt，“saidDonQuixote，“forthereisnootherIintheworld；thishistoryhasbeengoingabouthereforsometimefromhandtohand，butitdoesnotstaylonginany，foreverybodygivesitatasteofhisfoot。IamnotdisturbedbyhearingthatIamwanderinginafantasticshapeinthedarknessofthepitorinthedaylightabove，forIamnottheonethathistorytreatsof。Ifitshouldbegood，faithful，andtrue，itwillhaveagesoflife；butifitshouldbebad，fromitsbirthtoitsburialwillnotbeaverylongjourney。“
　　AltisidorawasabouttoproceedwithhercomplaintagainstDonQuixote，whenhesaidtoher，“Ihaveseveraltimestoldyou，senorathatitgrievesmeyoushouldhavesetyouraffectionsuponme，asfromminetheycanonlyreceivegratitude，butnoreturn。IwasborntobelongtoDulcineadelToboso，andthefates，ifthereareany，dedicatedmetoher；andtosupposethatanyotherbeautycantaketheplacesheoccupiesinmyheartistosupposeanimpossibility。Thisfrankdeclarationshouldsufficetomakeyouretirewithintheboundsofyourmodesty，fornoonecanbindhimselftodoimpossibilities。“
　　Hearingthis，Altisidora，withashowofangerandagitation，exclaimed，“God'slife！DonStockfish，soulofamortar，stoneofadate，moreobstinateandobduratethanaclownaskedafavourwhenhehashismindmadeup，ifIfalluponyouI'lltearyoureyesout！
　　Doyoufancy，DonVanquished，DonCudgelled，thatIdiedforyoursake？Allthatyouhaveseento-nighthasbeenmake-believe；I'mnotthewomantolettheblackofmynailsufferforsuchacamel，muchlessdie！”
　　“ThatIcanwellbelieve，“saidSancho；“forallthataboutloverspiningtodeathisabsurd；theymaytalkofit，butasfordoingit-
　　Judasmaybelievethat！”
　　Whiletheyweretalking，themusician，singer，andpoet，whohadsungthetwostanzasgivenabovecamein，andmakingaprofoundobeisancetoDonQuixotesaid，“Willyourworship，sirknight，reckonandretainmeinthenumberofyourmostfaithfulservants，forIhavelongbeenagreatadmirerofyours，aswellbecauseofyourfameasbecauseofyourachievements？”“Willyourworshiptellmewhoyouare，“repliedDonQuixote，“sothatmycourtesymaybeanswerabletoyourdeserts？”Theyoungmanrepliedthathewasthemusicianandsongsterofthenightbefore。“Ofatruth，“saidDonQuixote，“yourworshiphasamostexcellentvoice；butwhatyousangdidnotseemtomeverymuchtothepurpose；forwhathaveGarcilasso'sstanzastodowiththedeathofthislady？”
　　“Don'tbesurprisedatthat，“returnedthemusician；“forwiththecallowpoetsofourdaythewayisforeveryonetowriteashepleasesandpilferwherehechooses，whetheritbegermanetothematterornot，andnow-a-daysthereisnopieceofsillinesstheycansingorwritethatisnotsetdowntopoeticlicence。“
　　DonQuixotewasabouttoreply，butwaspreventedbythedukeandduchess，whocameintoseehim，andwiththemtherefollowedalonganddelightfulconversation，inthecourseofwhichSanchosaidsomanydrollandsaucythingsthatheleftthedukeandduchesswonderingnotonlyathissimplicitybutathissharpness。DonQuixotebeggedtheirpermissiontotakehisdeparturethatsameday，inasmuchasforavanquishedknightlikehimselfitwasfitterheshouldliveinapig-stythaninaroyalpalace。Theygaveitveryreadily，andtheduchessaskedhimifAltisidorawasinhisgoodgraces。
　　Hereplied，“Senora，letmetellyourladyshipthatthisdamsel'sailmentcomesentirelyofidleness，andthecureforitishonestandconstantemployment。Sheherselfhastoldmethatlaceisworninhell；andasshemustknowhowtomakeit，letitneverbeoutofherhands；forwhensheisoccupiedinshiftingthebobbinstoandfro，theimageorimagesofwhatsheloveswillnotshifttoandfroinherthoughts；thisisthetruth，thisismyopinion，andthisismyadvice。“
　　“Andmine，“addedSancho；“forIneverinallmylifesawalace-makerthatdiedforlove；whendamselsareatworktheirmindsaremoresetonfinishingtheirtasksthanonthinkingoftheirloves。
　　Ispeakfrommyownexperience；forwhenI'mdiggingIneverthinkofmyoldwoman；ImeanmyTeresaPanza，whomIlovebetterthanmyowneyelids。““Yousaywell，Sancho，“saidtheduchess，“andIwilltakecarethatmyAltisidoraemploysherselfhenceforwardinneedleworkofsomesort；forsheisextremelyexpertatit。““Thereisnooccasiontohaverecoursetothatremedy，senora，“saidAltisidora；
　　“forthemerethoughtofthecrueltywithwhichthisvagabondvillainhastreatedmewillsufficetoblothimoutofmymemorywithoutanyotherdevice；withyourhighness'sleaveIwillretire，nottohavebeforemyeyes，Iwon'tsayhisruefulcountenance，buthisabominable，uglylooks。““Thatremindsmeofthecommonsaying，that'hethatrailsisreadytoforgive，'“saidtheduke。
　　Altisidorathen，pretendingtowipeawayhertearswithahandkerchief，madeanobeisancetohermasterandmistressandquittedtheroom。
　　“Illluckbetidethee，poordamsel，“saidSancho，“illluckbetidethee！Thouhastfalleninwithasoulasdryasarushandaheartashardasoak；haditbeenme，i'faith'anothercockwouldhavecrowedtothee。'“
　　Sotheconversationcametoanend，andDonQuixotedressedhimselfanddinedwiththedukeandduchess，andsetoutthesameevening。