mannerofpeoplesgoingovertothosecountriestosettle,
howtheyhadaquantityoflandgiventhembytheConstitution
oftheplace;andifnot,thatitmightbepurchasedatsoeasya
ratethisitwasnotworthnaming。
Ithengavehimafullanddistinctaccountofthenatureof
planting;howwithcarryingoverbuttwoorthreehundred
poundsvalueinEnglishgoods,withsomeservantsandtools,
amanofapplicationwouldpresentlylayafoundationfora
family,andinaveryfewyearsbecertaintoraiseanestate。
Ilethimintothenatureoftheproductoftheearth;howthe
groundwascuredandprepared,andwhattheusualincrease
ofitwas;anddemonstratedtohim,thatinaveryfewyears,
withsuchabeginning,weshouldbeascertainofbeingrich
aswewerenowcertainofbeingpoor。
Hewassurprisedatmydiscourse;forwemadeitthewhole
subjectofourconversationfornearaweektogether,inwhich
timeIlaiditdowninblackandwhite,aswesay,thatitwas
morallyimpossible,withasuppositionofanyreasonablegood
conduct,butthatwemustthrivethereanddoverywell。
ThenItoldhimwhatmeasuresIwouldtaketoraisesucha
sumof#300orthereabouts;andIarguedwithhimhowgood
amethoditwouldbetoputanendtoourmisfortunesand
restoreourcircumstancesintheworld,towhatwehadboth
expected;andIadded,thataftersevenyears,ifwelived,we
mightbeinaposturetoleaveourplantationsingoodhands,
andcomeoveragainandreceivetheincomeofit,andlive
hereandenjoyit;andIgavehimexamplesofsomethathad
doneso,andlivednowinverygoodcircumstancesinLondon。
Inshort,Ipressedhimsotoit,thathealmostagreedtoit,but
stillsomethingorotherbrokeitoffagain;tillatlastheturned
thetables,andhebegantotalkalmosttothesamepurposeof
Ireland。
Hetoldmethatamanthatcouldconfinehimselftocountry
life,andthatcouldfindbutstocktoenteruponanyland,
shouldhavefarmstherefor#50ayear,asgoodaswerehere
letfor#200ayear;thattheproducewassuch,andsorichthe
land,thatifmuchwasnotlaidup,weweresuretoliveas
handsomelyuponitasagentlemanof#3000ayearcoulddo
inEnglandandthathehadlaidaschemetoleavemeinLondon,
andgooverandtry;andifhefoundhecouldlayahandsome
foundationoflivingsuitabletotherespecthehadforme,as
hedoubtednotheshoulddo,hewouldcomeoverandfetchme。
Iwasdreadfullyafraidthatuponsuchaproposalhewould
havetakenmeatmyword,viz。tosellmylittleincomeasI
calledit,andturnitintomoney,andlethimcarryitoverinto
Irelandandtryhisexperimentwithit;buthewastoojustto
desireit,ortohaveaccepteditifIhadofferedit;andhe
anticipatedmeinthat,forheadded,thathewouldgoandtry
hisfortunethatway,andifhefoundhecoulddoanythingat
ittolive,then,byaddingminetoitwhenIwentover,we
shouldlivelikeourselves;butthathewouldnothazarda
shillingofminetillhehadmadetheexperimentwithalittle,
andheassuredmethatifhefoundnothingtobedoneinIreland,
hewouldthencometomeandjoininmyprojectforVirginia。
Hewassoearnestuponhisprojectbeingtobetriedfirst,that
Icouldnotwithstandhim;however,hepromisedtoletme
hearfromhiminaverylittletimeafterhisarrivingthere,to
letmeknowwhetherhisprospectansweredhisdesign,that
iftherewasnotapossibilityofsuccess,Imighttakethe
occasiontoprepareforourothervoyage,andthen,heassured
me,hewouldgowithmetoAmericawithallhisheart。
Icouldbringhimtonothingfurtherthanthis。
However,those
consultationsentertainedusnearamonth,duringwhichI
enjoyedhiscompany,whichindeedwasthemostentertaining
thateverImetinmylifebefore。
Inthistimeheletmeinto
thewholestoryofhisownlife,whichwasindeedsurprising,
andfullofaninfinitevarietysufficienttofillupamuchbrighter
history,foritsadventuresandincidents,thananyIeversayin
print;butIshallhaveoccasiontosaymoreofhimhereafter。
Wepartedatlast,thoughwiththeutmostreluctanceonmy
side;andindeedhetookhisleaveveryunwillinglytoo,but
necessityobligedhim,forhisreasonswereverygoodwhyhe
wouldnotcometoLondon,asIunderstoodmorefullysome
timeafterwards。
Igavehimadirectionhowtowritetome,thoughstillI
reservedthegrandsecret,andneverbrokemyresolution,
whichwasnottolethimeverknowmytruename,whoIwas,
orwheretobefound;helikewiseletmeknowhowtowritea
lettertohim,sothat,hesaid,hewouldbesuretoreceiveit。
IcametoLondonthenextdayafterweparted,butdidnotgo
directlytomyoldlodgings;butforanothernamelessreason
tookaprivatelodginginSt。John’sStreet,or,asitisvulgarly
called,St。Jones’s,nearClerkenwell;andhere,beingperfectly
alone,Ihadleisuretositdownandreflectseriouslyuponthe
lastsevenmonths’rambleIhadmade,forIhadbeenabroad
noless。
ThepleasanthoursIhadwithmylasthusbandIlooked
backonwithaninfinitedealofpleasure;butthatpleasurewas
verymuchlessenedwhenIfoundsometimeafterthatIwas
reallywithchild。
Thiswasaperplexingthing,becauseofthedifficultywhich
wasbeforemewhereIshouldgetleavetoliein;itbeingoneof
thenicestthingsintheworldatthattimeofdayforawoman
thatwasastranger,andhadnofriends,tobeentertainedin
thatcircumstancewithoutsecurity,which,bytheway,Ihad
not,neithercouldIprocureany。
Ihadtakencareallthiswhiletopreserveacorrespondence
withmyhonestfriendatthebank,orratherhetookcareto
correspondwithme,forhewrotetomeonceaweek;and
thoughIhadnotspentmymoneysofastastowantanyfrom
him,yetIoftenwrotealsotolethimknowIwasalive。
Ihad
leftdirectionsinLancashire,sothatIhadtheseletters,which
hesent,conveyedtome;andduringmyrecessatSt。Jones’s
receivedaveryobligingletterfromhim,assuringmethathis
processforadivorcefromhiswifewentonwithsuccess,
thoughhemetwithsomedifficultiesinitthathedidnotexpect。
Iwasnotdispleasedwiththenewsthathisprocesswasmore
tediousthanheexpected;forthoughIwasinnoconditionto
havehimyet,notbeingsofoolishtomarryhimwhenIknew
myselftobewithchildbyanotherman,assomeIknowhave
venturedtodo,yetIwasnotwillingtolosehim,and,ina
word,resolvedtohavehimifhecontinuedinthesamemind,
assoonasIwasupagain;forIsawapparentlyIshouldhear
nomorefrommyhusband;andashehadallalongpressedto
marry,andhadassuredmehewouldnotbeatalldisgustedat
it,oreveroffertoclaimmeagain,soImadenoscrupleto
resolvetodoitifIcould,andifmyotherfriendstoodtohis
bargain;andIhadagreatdealofreasontobeassuredthathe
wouldstandtoit,bythelettershewrotetome,whichwere
thekindestandmostobligingthatcouldbe。
Inowgrewbig,andthepeoplewhereIlodgedperceivedit,
andbegantotakenoticeofittome,and,asfarascivility
wouldallow,intimatedthatImustthinkofremoving。
This
putmetoextremeperplexity,andIgrewverymelancholy,for
indeedIknewnotwhatcoursetotake。
Ihadmoney,butno
friends,andwasliketohaveachilduponmyhandstokeep,
whichwasadifficultIhadneverhaduponmeyet,asthe
particularsofmystoryhithertomakeappear。
InthecourseofthisaffairIfellveryill,andmymelancholy
reallyincreasedmydistemper;myillnessprovedatlengthto
beonlyanague,butmyapprehensionswerereallythatIshould
miscarry。
Ishouldnotsayapprehensions,forindeedIwould
havebeengladtomiscarry,butIcouldneverbebroughtto
entertainsomuchasathoughtofendeavouringtomiscarry,
oroftakinganythingtomakememiscarry;Iabhorred,Isay,
somuchasthethoughtofit。
However,speakingofitinthehouse,thegentlewomanwho
keptthehouseproposedtometosendforamidwife。
I
scrupleditatfirst,butaftersometimeconsentedtoit,but
toldherIhadnoparticularacquaintancewithanymidwife,
andsoleftittoher。
Itseemsthemistressofthehousewasnotsogreatastranger
tosuchcasesasminewasasIthoughtatfirstshehadbeen,
aswillappearpresently,andshesentforamidwifeofthe
rightsort——thatistosay,therightsortforme。
Thewomanappearedtobeanexperiencedwomaninher
business,Imeanasamidwife;butshehadanothercallingtoo,
inwhichshewasasexpertasmostwomenifnotmore。
My
landladyhadtoldherIwasverymelancholy,andthatshe
believedthathaddonemeharm;andonce,beforeme,saidto
her,’Mrs。B——’meaningthemidwife,’Ibelievethislady’s
troubleisofakindthatisprettymuchinyourway,and
thereforeifyoucandoanythingforher,praydo,forsheisa
verycivilgentlewoman’;andsoshewentoutoftheroom。
Ireallydidnotunderstandher,butmyMotherMidnightbegan
veryseriouslytoexplainwhatshemean,assoonasshewas
gone。
’Madam,’saysshe,’youseemnottounderstandwhat
yourlandladymeans;andwhenyoudounderstandit,youneed
notletherknowatallthatyoudoso。
’Shemeansthatyouareundersomecircumstancesthatmay
renderyourlyingindifficulttoyou,andthatyouarenotwilling
tobeexposed。
Ineedsaynomore,buttotellyou,thatifyou
thinkfittocommunicatesomuchofyourcasetome,ifitbeso,
asisnecessary,forIdonotdesiretopryintothosethings,I
perhapsmaybeinapositiontohelpyouandtomakeyou
perfectlyeasy,andremoveallyourdullthoughtsuponthat
subject。’
Everywordthiscreaturesaidwasacordialtome,andput
newlifeandnewspiritintomyheart;mybloodbeganto
circulateimmediately,andIwasquiteanotherbody;Iatemy
victualsagain,andgrewbetterpresentlyafterit。
Shesaida
greatdealmoretothesamepurpose,andthen,havingpressed
metobefreewithher,andpromisedinthesolemnestmanner
tobesecret,shestoppedalittle,asifwaitingtoseewhat
impressionitmadeonme,andwhatIwouldsay。
IwastosensibletoothewantIwasinofsuchawoman,not
toacceptheroffer;Itoldhermycasewaspartlyasshe
guessed,andpartlynot,forIwasreallymarried,andhada
husband,thoughhewasinsuchfinecircumstancesandso
remoteatthattime,asthathecouldnotappearpublicly。
Shetookmeshort,andtoldmethatwasnoneofherbusiness;
alltheladiesthatcameunderhercareweremarriedwomen
toher。