`ByGad,theyarecoming!Ithinkthedeed’sdone!’
`No,’saidUncleJoe,followinghimin。`Takemyword,heturnedrustyatthelastminute。Theyarewalkinginaveryunusualway;andthat’sthemeaningofit!’
Theywaitedinsilencetillthewedding-partycouldbeheardenteringthehouse。FirstintotheroomcameArabellaboisterously;andherfacewasenoughtoshowthatherstrategyhadsucceeded。
`Mrs。Fawley,Ipresume?’saidTinkerTaylorwithmockcourtesy。
`Certainly。Mrs。Fawleyagain,’repliedArabellablandly,pullingoffhergloveandholdingoutherlefthand。`There’sthepadlock,see……
Well,hewasaverynice,gentlemanlymanindeed。Imeantheclergyman。
Hesaidtomeasgentleasababewhenallwasdone:`Mrs。Fawley,Icongratulateyouheartily,’hesays。`Forhavingheardyourhistory,andthatofyourhusband,Ithinkyouhavebothdonetherightandproperthing。Andforyourpasterrorsasawife,andhisasahusband,Ithinkyououghtnowtobeforgivenbytheworld,asyouhaveforgiveneachother,’sayshe。
Yes:hewasaverynice,gentlemanlyman。`TheChurchdon’trecognizedivorceinherdogma,strictlyspeaking,’hesays:`andbearinmindthewordsoftheserviceinyourgoingsoutandyourcomingsin:WhatGodhathjoinedtogetherletnomanputasunder。’Yes:hewasaverynice,gentlemanlyman……But,Jude,mydear,youwereenoughtomakeacatlaugh!Youwalkedthatstraight,andheldyourselfthatsteady,thatonewouldhavethoughtyouweregoing’prenticetoajudge;thoughIknewyouwereseeingdoubleallthetime,fromthewayyoufumbledwithmyfinger。’
`IsaidI’ddoanythingto-saveawoman’shonour,’mutteredJude。`AndI’vedoneit!’
`Wellnow,olddeary,comealongandhavesomebreakfast。’
`Iwant-some-morewhisky,’saidJudestolidly。
`Nonsense,dear。Notnow!There’snomoreleft。Theteawilltakethemuddleoutofourheads,andweshallbeasfreshaslarks。’
`Allright。I’ve-marriedyou。ShesaidIoughttomarryyouagain,andIhavestraightway。Itistruereligion!Ha-ha-ha!’
JudetheObscureChapter50VI-viiiMichaelmascameandpassed,andJudeandhiswife,whohadlivedbutashorttimeinherfather’shouseaftertheirremarriage,wereinlodgingsonthetopfloorofadwellingnearertothecentreofthecity。
Hehaddoneafewdays’workduringthetwoorthreemonthssincetheevent,buthishealthhadbeenindifferent,anditwasnowprecarious。
Hewassittinginanarm-chairbeforethefire,andcoughedagooddeal。
`I’vegotabargainformytroubleinmarryingtheeoveragain!’
Arabellawassayingtohim。`Ishallhavetokeep’eeentirely-that’swhat’twillcometo!Ishallhavetomakeblack-potandsausages,andhawk’emaboutthestreet,alltosupportaninvalidhusbandI’dnobusinesstobesaddledwithatall。Whydidn’tyoukeepyourhealth,deceivingonelikethis?Youwerewellenoughwhentheweddingwas!’
`Ah,yes!’saidhe,laughingacridly。`IhavebeenthinkingofmyfoolishfeelingaboutthepigyouandIkilledduringourfirstmarriage。
IfeelnowthatthegreatestmercythatcouldbevouchsafedtomewouldbethatsomethingshouldservemeasIservedthatanimal。’
Thiswasthesortofdiscoursethatwentonbetweenthemeverydaynow。Thelandlordofthelodging,whohadheardthattheywereaqueercouple,haddoubtediftheyweremarriedatall,especiallyashehadseenArabellakissJudeoneeveningwhenshehadtakenalittlecordial;andhewasabouttogivethemnoticetoquit,tillbychanceoverhearingheronenightharanguingJudeinrattlingterms,andultimatelyflingingashoeathishead,herecognizedthenoteofgenuinewedlock;andconcludingthattheymustberespectable,saidnomore。
Judedidnotgetanybetter,andonedayherequestedArabella,withconsiderablehesitation,toexecuteacommissionforhim。Sheaskedhimindifferentlywhatitwas。
`TowritetoSue。’
`Whatinthename-doyouwantmetowritetoherfor?’
`Toaskhowsheis,andifshe’llcometoseeme,becauseI’mill,andshouldliketoseeher-onceagain。’
`Itislikeyoutoinsultalawfulwifebyaskingsuchathing!’
`ItisjustinordernottoinsultyouthatIaskyoutodoit。
YouknowIloveSue。Idon’twishtomincethematter-therestandsthefact:Iloveher。Icouldfindadozenwaysofsendingalettertoherwithoutyourknowledge。ButIwishtobequiteabove-boardwithyou,andwithherhusband。Amessagethroughyouaskinghertocomeisatleastfreefromanyodourofintrigue。Ifsheretainsanyofheroldnatureatall,she’llcome。’
`You’venorespectformarriagewhatever,oritsrightsandduties!’
`Whatdoesitmatterwhatmyopinionsare-awretchlikeme!Canitmattertoanybodyintheworldwhocomestoseemeforhalfanhour-herewithonefootinthegrave!……Come,pleasewrite,Arabella!’
hepleaded。`Repaymycandourbyalittlegenerosity!’
`Ishouldthinknot!’
`Notjustonce?-Ohdo!’Hefeltthathisphysicalweaknesshadtakenawayallhisdignity。
`Whatdoyouwanthertoknowhowyouarefor?Shedon’twanttosee’ee。She’stheratthatforsookthesinkingship!’
`Don’t,don’t!’
`AndIstucktoun-themorefoolI!Havethatstrumpetinthehouseindeed!’
AlmostassoonasthewordswerespokenJudesprangfromthechair,andbeforeArabellaknewwhereshewashehadheronherbackuponalittlecouchwhichstoodthere,hekneelingaboveher。
`Sayanotherwordofthatsort,’hewhispered,`andI’llkillyou-hereandnow!I’veeverythingtogainbyit-myowndeathnotbeingtheleastpart。Sodon’tthinkthere’snomeaninginwhatIsay!’
`Whatdoyouwantmetodo?’gaspedArabella。
`Promisenevertospeakofher。’
`Verywell。Ido。’
`Itakeyourword,’hesaidscornfullyasheloosenedher。`ButwhatitisworthIcan’tsay。’
`Youcouldn’tkillthepig,butyoucouldkillme!’
`Ah-thereyouhaveme!No-Icouldn’tkillyou-eveninapassion。Tauntaway!’
Hethenbegancoughingverymuch,andsheestimatedhislifewithanappraiser’seyeashesankbackghastlypale。`I’llsendforher,’Arabellamurmured,`ifyou’llagreetomybeingintheroomwithyouallthetimeshe’shere。’
Thesoftersideofhisnature,thedesiretoseeSue,madehimunabletoresisttheofferevennow,provokedashehadbeen;andherepliedbreathlessly:`Yes,Iagree。Onlysendforher!’
Intheeveningheinquiredifshehadwritten。
`Yes,’shesaid;`Iwroteanotetellingheryouwereill,andaskinghertocometo-morroworthedayafter。Ihaven’tpostedityet。’
ThenextdayJudewonderedifshereallydidpostit,butwouldnotaskher;andfoolishHope,thatlivesonadropandacrumb,madehimrestlesswithexpectation。Heknewthetimesofthepossibletrains,andlistenedoneachoccasionforsoundsofher。
Shedidnotcome;butJudewouldnotaddressArabellaagainthereon。
Hehopedandexpectedallthenextday;butnoSueappeared;neitherwasthereanynoteofreply。ThenJudedecidedintheprivacyofhismindthatArabellahadneverpostedhers,althoughshehadwrittenit。Therewassomethinginhermannerwhichtoldit。Hisphysicalweaknesswassuchthatheshedtearsatthedisappointmentwhenshewasnottheretosee。Hissuspicionswere,infact,wellfounded。Arabella,likesomeothernurses,thoughtthatyourdutytowardsyourinvalidwastopacifyhimbyanymeansshortofreallyactinguponhisfancies。
Heneversaidanotherwordtoherabouthiswishorhisconjecture。
Asilent,undiscernedresolvegrewupinhim,whichgavehim,ifnotstrength,stabilityandcalm。Onemiddaywhen,afteranabsenceoftwohours,shecameintotheroom,shebeheldthechairempty。
Downshefloppedonthebed,andsitting,meditated。`Nowwherethedevilismymangoneto!’shesaid。
Adrivingrainfromthenorth-easthadbeenfallingwithmoreorlessintermissionallthemorning,andlookingfromthewindowatthedrippingspoutsitseemedimpossibletobelievethatanysickmanwouldhaveventuredouttoalmostcertaindeath。YetaconvictionpossessedArabellathathehadgoneout,anditbecameacertaintywhenshehadsearchedthehouse。`Ifhe’ssuchafool,lethimbe!’shesaid。`Icandonomore。’
JudewasatthatmomentinarailwaytrainthatwasdrawingneartoAlfredston,oddlyswathed,paleasamonumentalfigureinalabaster,andmuchstaredatbyotherpassengers。Anhourlaterhisthinform,inthelonggreat-coatandblankethehadcomewith,butwithoutanumbrella,couldhavebeenseenwalkingalongthefive-mileroadtoMarygreen。Onhisfaceshowedthedeterminedpurposethatalonesustainedhim,buttowhichhasweaknessaffordedasorryfoundation。Bytheup-hillwalkhewasquiteblown,buthepressedon;andathalf-pastthreeo’clockstoodbythefamiliarwellatMarygreen。Therainwaskeepingeverybodyindoors;
Judecrossedthegreentothechurchwithoutobservation,andfoundthebuildingopen。Herehestood,lookingforthattheschool,whencehecouldheartheusualsing-songtonesofthelittlevoicesthathadnotlearntCreation’sgroan。
Hewaitedtillasmallboycamefromtheschool-oneevidentlyallowedoutbeforehoursforsomereasonorother。Judehelduphishand,andthechildcame。
`PleasecallattheschoolhouseandaskMrs。Phillotsonifshewillbekindenoughtocometothechurchforafewminutes。’
Thechilddeparted,andJudeheardhimknockatthedoorofthedwelling。Hehimselfwentfurtherintothechurch。Everythingwasnew,exceptafewpiecesofcarvingpreservedfromthewreckedoldfabric,nowfixedagainstthenewwalls。Hestoodbythese:theyseemedakintotheperishedpeopleofthatplacewhowerehisancestorsandSue’s。
Alightfootstep,whichmighthavebeenaccountednomorethananaddeddriptotherainfall,soundedintheporch,andhelookedround。
`Oh-Ididn’tthinkitwasyou!Ididn’t-Oh,Jude!’Ahystericalcatchinherbreathendedinasuccessionofthem。Headvanced,butshequicklyrecoveredandwentback。
`Don’tgo-don’tgo!’heimplored。`Thisismylasttime!Ithoughtitwouldbelessintrusivethantoenteryourhouse。AndIshallnevercomeagain。Don’tthenbeunmerciful。Sue,Sue!Weareactingbytheletter;
and’theletterkilleth’!’
`I’llstay-Iwon’tbeunkind!’shesaid,hermouthquiveringandhertearsflowingassheallowedhimtocomecloser。`Butwhydidyoucome,anddothiswrongthing,afterdoingsucharightthingasyouhavedone?’
`Whatrightthing?’
`MarryingArabellaagain。ItwasintheAlfredstonpaper。Shehasneverbeenotherthanyours,Jude-inapropersense。Andthereforeyoudidsowell-Ohsowell!-inrecognizingit-andtakinghertoyouagain。’
`Godabove-andisthatallI’vecometohear?Ifthereisanythingmoredegrading,immoral,unnatural,thananotherinmylife,itisthismeretriciouscontractwithArabellawhichhasbeencalleddoingtherightthing!Andyoutoo-youcallyourselfPhillotson’swife!Hiswife!
Youaremine。’
`Don’tmakemerushawayfromyou-Ican’tbearmuch!ButonthispointIamdecided。’
`Icannotunderstandhowyoudidit-howyouthinkit-Icannot!’
`Nevermindthat。Heisakindhusbandtome-AndI-I’vewrestledandstruggled,andfasted,andprayed。Ihavenearlybroughtmybodyintocompletesubjection。Andyoumustn’t-willyou-wake-’
`Ohyoudarlinglittlefool;whereisyourreason?Youseemtohavesufferedthelossofyourfaculties!IwouldarguewithyouifIdidn’tknowthatawomaninyourstateoffeelingisquitebeyondallappealstoherbrains。Orisitthatyouarehumbuggingyourself,assomanywomendoaboutthesethings;anddon’tactuallybelievewhatyoupretendto,andonlyareindulgingintheluxuryoftheemotionraisedbyanaffectedbelief?’
`Luxury!Howcanyoubesocruel!’
`Youdear,sad,soft,mostmelancholywreckofapromisinghumanintellectthatithaseverbeenmylottobehold!Whereisyourscornofconventiongone?Iwouldhavediedgame!’