Andtheysmitehimbeneficentlywithsoreafflictions，andblighthisworldallintogrimfrozenruinsroundhim，——andcanmakeawanderingExileoftheirDante，andnotasoft-beddedPodestaofFlorence，iftheywishtogeta_DivineComedy_outofhim。Naythatratheristheirway，whentheyhaveworthyworkforsuchaman；theyscourgehimmanifoldlytotheduepitch，sometimesnearlyofdespair，thathemaysearchdesperatelyforhiswork，andfindit；theyurgehimonstillwithbeneficentstripeswhenneedful，asisconstantlythecasebetweenwhiles；and，infact，haveprivatelydecidedtorewardhimwithbeneficentdeathbyandby，andnotwithmoneyatall。Omybenevolentfriend，IhonorHowardverymuch；butitisonthissideidolatryalongway，nottoaninfinite，buttoadecidedlyfiniteextent！Andyou，——putnotthemodestnobleHoward，atrulymodestman，totheblush，byforcingthesereflectionsonus！
　　CholeraDoctors，hiredtodiveintoblackdensofinfectionanddespair，they，rushingaboutalldayfromlanetolane，withtheirlifeintheirhand，arefoundtodotheirfunction；whichisamuchmoreruggedonethanHoward’s。Orwhatsaywe，CholeraDoctors？Raggedloselsgatheredbybeatofdrumfromtheovercrowdedstreetsofcities，anddrilledalittleanddressedinred，donottheystandfireinanuncensurablemanner；andhandsomelygivetheirlife，ifneedful，attherateofashillingperday？Humanvirtue，ifwewentdowntotherootsofit，isnotsorare。Thematerialsofhumanvirtueareeverywhereabundantasthelightofthesun：rawmaterials，——Owoe，andloss，andscandalthriceandthreefold，thattheysoseldomareelaborated，andbuiltintoaresult！thattheylieyetunelaborated，andstagnantinthesoulsofwide-spreaddrearymillions，fermenting，festering；andissueatlastasenergeticviceinsteadofstrongpracticalvirtue！AMrs。Manning“dyinggame，“——alas，isnotthatthefoiledpotentialityofakindofheroinetoo？NotaheroicJudith，notamotheroftheGracchinow，butahideousmurderess，fittobethemotherofhyenas！Tosuchextentcanpotentialitiesbefoiled。Education，kingship，command，——whereisit，whitherhasitfled？Woeathousandtimes，thatthis，whichisthetaskofallkings，captains，priests，publicspeakers，land-owners，book-writers，mill-owners，andpersonspossessingorpretendingtopossessauthorityamongmankind，——isleftneglectedamongthemall；andinsteadofitsolittledonebutprotocolling，black-or-whitesurplicing，partridge-shooting，parliamentaryeloquenceandpopulartwaddle-literature；withsuchresultsaswesee！——
　　HowardabatedtheJail-fever；butitseemstomehehasbeentheinnocentcauseofafarmoredistressingfeverwhichrageshighjustnow；whatwemaycalltheBenevolent-PlatformFever。Howardistoberegardedastheunluckyfountainofthattumultuousfrothyocean-tideofbenevolentsentimentality，“abolitionofpunishment，“all-absorbing“prison-discipline，“andgeneralmorbidsympathy，insteadofheartyhatred，forscoundrels；whichisthreateningtodrownhumansocietyasindeluges，andleave，insteadofan“edificeofsociety“fitforthehabitationofmen，acontinentoffetidoozeinhabitableonlybymud-godsandcreaturesthatwalkupontheirbelly。Fewthingsmoredistressathinkingsoulatthistime。
　　MostsickamI，Ofriends，ofthissugarydisastrousjargonofphilanthropy，thereignoflove，neweraofuniversalbrotherhood，andnotParadisetotheWell-deservingbutParadisetoAll-and-sundry，whichpossessesthebenightedmindsofmenandwomeninourday。Myfriends，IthinkyouaremuchmistakenaboutParadise！“NoParadiseforanybody：hethatcannotdowithoutParadise，gohisways：“supposeyoutriedthatforawhile！Ireckonthatthesaferversion。Unhappysugarybrethren，thisisalluntrue，thisother；contrarytothefact；
　　notatatterofitwillhangtogetherinthewindandweatheroffact。InbrotherhoodwiththebaseandfoolishI，forone，donotmeantolive。Notinbrotherhoodwiththemwaslifehithertoworthmuchtome；inpity，inhopenotyetquiteswallowedofdisgust，——otherwiseinenmitythatmustlastthrougheternity，inunappeasableaversionshallIhavetolivewiththese！
　　Brotherhood？No，bethethoughtfarfromme。TheyareAdam’schildren，——alasyes，Iwellrememberthat，andnevershallforgetit；hencethisrageandsorrow。Buttheyhavegoneovertothedragons；theyhavequittedtheFather’shouse，andsetupwiththeOldSerpent：tilltheyreturn，howcantheybebrothers？
　　Theyareenemies，deadlytothemselvesandtomeandtoyou，tillthen；tillthen，whilehopeyetlasts，Iwilltreatthemasbrothersfalleninsane；——whenhopehasended，withtearsgrownsacredandwrathgrownsacred，IwillcutthemoffinthenameofGod！ItisatmyperilifIdonot。WiththeservantofSatanI
　　darenotcontinueinpartnership。HimImustputaway，resolutelyandforever；“lest，“asitiswritten，“Ibecomepartakerofhisplagues。“
　　BeautifulBlackPeasantry，whohavefallenidleandhavegottheDevilatyourelbow；interestingWhiteFelonry，whoarenotidle，buthaveenlistedintotheDevil’sregimentsoftheline，——knowthatmybenevolenceforyouiscomparativelytrifling！WhatI
　　haveofthatdivinefeelingisduetoothers，nottoyou。A
　　“universalSluggard-and-ScoundrelProtectionSociety“isnottheoneImeantoinstituteinthesetimes，wheresomuchwantsprotection，andissinkingtosadissuesforwantofit！Thescoundrelneedsnoprotection。Thescoundrelthatwillhastentothegallows，whynotratherclearthewayforhim！Betterhereach_his_goalandoutgatebythenaturalproclivity，thanbesoexpensivelydammedupanddetained，poisoningeverythingashestagnatesandmeandersalong，toarriveatlastahundredtimesfouler，andswollenahundredtimesbigger！Benevolentmenshouldreflectonthis——AndyouQuashee，mypumpkin，——notabadfelloweither，thispoorQuashee，whentolerablyguided！——idleQuashee，IsayyoumustgettheDevil_sentaway_fromyourelbow，mypoordarkfriend！Inthisworldtherewillbenoexistenceforyouotherwise。No，notasthebrotherofyourfollywillIlivebesideyou。Pleasetowithdrawoutofmyway，ifIamnottocontradictyourfolly，andamendit，andputitinthestocksifitwillnotamend。BytheEternalMaker，itisonthatfootingalonethatyouandIcanlivetogether！AndifyouhadrespectabletraditionsdatedfrombeyondMagnaCharta，orfrombeyondtheDeluge，tothecontrary，andwrittensheepskinsthatwouldthatchthefaceoftheworld，——beholdI，foroneindividual，donotbelievesaidrespectabletraditions，norregardsaidwrittensheepskinsexceptasthingswhich_you_，tillyougrowwiser，willbelieve。Adieu，Quashee；Iwillwishyoubetterguidancethanyouhavehadoflate。
　　Onthewhole，whatareflectionisitthatwecannotbestowonanunworthymananyparticleofourbenevolence，ourpatronage，orwhateverresourceisours，——withoutwithdrawingit，itandallthatwillgrowofit，fromoneworthy，towhomitofrightbelongs！Wecannot，Isay；impossible；itistheeternallawofthings。IncompetentDuncanM’Pastehorn，thehaplessincompetentmortaltowhomIgivethecobblingofmyboots，——andcannotfindinmyhearttorefuseit，thepoordrunkenwretchhavingawifeandtenchildren；he_withdraws_thejobfromsober，plainlycompetent，andmeritoriousMr。Sparrowbill，generallyshortofworktoo；discouragesSparrowbill；teacheshimthathetoomayaswelldrinkandloiterandbungle；thatthisisnotasceneformeritanddemeritatall，butfordupery，andwhiningflattery，andincompetentcobblingofeverydescription；——clearlytendingtotheruinofpoorSparrowbill！WhatharmhadSparrowbilldonemethatIshouldsohelptoruinhim？AndIcouldn’tsavetheinsalvableM’Pastehorn；Imerelyyieldedhim，forinsufficientwork，hereandthereahalf-crown，——whichheoftenestdrank。AndnowSparrowbillalsoisdrinking！
　　Justice，Justice：woebetidesuseverywherewhen，forthisreasonorforthat，wefailtodojustice！Nobeneficence，benevolence，orothervirtuouscontributionwillmakegoodthewant。Andinwhatarateofterriblegeometricalprogression，farbeyondourpoorcomputation，anyactofInjusticeoncedonebyusgrows；rootingitselfeveranew，spreadingeveranew，likeabanyan-tree，——blastingalllifeunderit，foritisapoison-tree！Thereisbutonethingneededfortheworld；butthatoneisindispensable。Justice，Justice，inthenameofHeaven；giveusJustice，andwelive；giveusonlycounterfeitsofit，orsuccedaneaforit，andwedie！
　　Oh，thisuniversalsyllabubofphilanthropictwaddle！Myfriend，itisverysad，nowwhenChristianityisasgoodasextinctinallhearts，tomeetthisghastly-PhantasmofChristianityparadingthroughalmostall。“Iwillcleanyourfoulthoroughfares，andmakeyourDevil’s-cloacaofaworldintoagardenofHeaven，“jabbersthisPhantasm，itselfaphosphorescenceandunclean！Theworst，itiswritten，comesfromcorruptionofthebest：——Semiticformsnowlyingputrescent，deadandstillunburied，thisphosphorescencerises。Isaysometimes，suchablockheadIdol，andmiserable_White_
　　Mumbo-jumbo，fashionedoutofdeciduoussticksandcastclothes，outofextinctcantsandmodernsentimentalisms，asthatwhichtheysinglitaniestoatExeterHallandextensivelyelsewhere，wasperhapsneversetupbyhumanfollybefore。Unhappycreatures，thatisnottheMakeroftheUniverse，notthat，lookonemomentattheUniverse，andsee！ThatisapaltryPhantasm，engenderedinyourownsickbrain；whoeverfollowsthatasaRealitywillfallintotheditch。
　　Reform，reform，allmenseeandfeel，isimperativelyneeded。
　　Reformmusteitherbegot，andspeedily，orelsewedie：andnearlyallthementhatspeak，instructus，saying，“HaveyouquitedoneyourinterestingNegroesintheSugarIslands？RushtotheJails，then，Oyereformers；snatchuptheinterestingscoundrel-populationthere，tothembenursing-fathersandnursing-mothers。Andoh，wash，anddress，andteach，andrecovertotheserviceofHeaventhesepoorlostsouls：so，weassureyou，willsocietyattaintheneedfulreform，andlifebestillpossibleinthisworld。“Thussingtheoracleseverywhere；
　　nearlyallthementhatspeak，thoughwedoubtnot，thereare，asusual，immensemajoritiesconsciouslyorunconsciouslywiserwhoholdtheirtongue。Butexceptthisofwhitewashingthescoundrel-population，oneseeslittle“reform“goingon。Thereisperhapssomeendeavortodoalittlescavengering；and，astheall-includingpoint，tocheapentheterriblecostofGovernment：
　　butneitheroftheseenterprisesmakesprogress，owingtoimpediments。
　　“Whitewashyourscoundrel-population；sweepoutyourabominableguttersifnotinthenameofGod，yebrutishslatterns，theninthenameofCholeraandtheRoyalCollegeofSurgeons：dothesetwothings；——andobserve，muchcheaperifyouplease！“——Well，heresurelyisanEvangelofFreedom，andrealProgramofanewEra。Whatsurliestmisanthropewouldnotfindthisworldlovely，werethesethingsdone：scoundrelswhitewashed；somedegreeofscavengeringuponthegutters；andatacheaprate，thirdly？
　　Thatsurelyisanoccasiononwhich，ifeveronany，theGeniusofReformmaypipeallhands！——PooroldGeniusofReform；bedridthisgoodwhile；withlittlebutbrokenballot-boxes，andtatteredstripesofBenthameeConstitutionslyingroundhim；andonthewallsmereshadowsofclothing-colonels，rates-in-aid，poor-lawunions，defunctpotatoandtheIrishdifficulty，——hedoesnotseemlongforthisworld，pipingtothateffect？
　　NottheleastdisgustingfeatureofthisGospelaccordingtothePlatformisitsreferencetoreligion，andeventotheChristianReligion，asanauthorityandmandateforwhatitdoes。
　　ChristianReligion？DoestheChristianoranyreligionprescribeloveofscoundrels，then？Ihopeitprescribesahealthyhatredofscoundrels；——otherwisewhatamI，inHeaven’sname，tomakeofit？Me，forone，itwillnotserveasareligiononthosestrangeterms。Justhatredofscoundrels，Isay；fixed，irreconcilable，inexorableenmitytotheenemiesofGod：this，andnotloveforthem，andincessantwhitewashing，anddressingandcockeringofthem，must，ifyoulookintoit，bethebackboneofanyhumanreligionwhatsoever。ChristianReligion！InwhatwordscanIaddressyou，yeunfortunates，sunkintheslushyoozetilltheworshipofmud-serpents，andunutterablePythonsandpoisonousslimymonstrosities，seemstoyoutheworshipofGod？
　　ThisistherottencarcassofChristianity；thismal-odorousphosphorescenceofpost-mortemsentimentalism。OHeavens，fromtheChristianityofOliverCromwell，wrestlingingrimfightwithSatanandhisincarnateBlackguardisms，Hypocrisies，Injustices，andlegionofhumanandinfernalangels，tothatofeloquentMr。
　　HesperusFiddlestringdenouncingcapitalpunishments，andinculcatingthebenevolenceonplatforms，whataroadhavewetravelled！
　　Afoolishstump-orator，peroratingonhisplatformmerebenevolences，seemsapleasantobjecttomanypersons；aharmlessorinsignificantonetoalmostall。Lookathim，however；scanhimtillyoudiscernthenatureofhim，heisnotpleasant，butuglyandperilous。Thatbeautifulspeechofhistakescaptiveeverylongear，andkindlesintoquasi-sacredenthusiasmthemindsofnotafew；butitisquiteintheteethoftheeverlastingfactsofthisUniverse，andwillcomeonlytomischiefforeverypartyconcerned。Considerthatlittlespoutingwretch。Withinthepaltryskinofhim，itistooprobable，heholdsfewhumanvirtues，beyondthoseessentialfordigestingvictual：envious，cowardly，vain，splenetichungrysoul；whatheroism，inwordorthoughtoraction，willyouevergetfromthelikeofhim？He，inhisnecessity，hastakenintothebenevolentline；warmsthecoldvacuityofhisinnermantosomeextent，inacomfortablemanner，notbysilentlydoingsomevirtueofhisown，butbyfiercelyrecommendinghearsaypseudo-virtuesandrespectablebenevolencestootherpeople。Doyoucallthatagoodtrade？Long-earedfellow-creatures，moreorlessresemblinghimself，answer，“Hear，hear！LiveFiddlestringforever！“WherefromfollowAbolitionCongresses，OdestotheGallows；——perhapssomedirtylittleBill，gettingitselfdebatednextSessioninParliament，towastecertainnightsofourlegislativeYear，andcauseskippinginourMorningNewspaper，tilltheabortioncanbeemptiedoutagainandsentfairlyfloatingdownthegutters。
　　NotwithentireapprobationdoI，forone，lookonthateloquentindividual。Wisebenevolence，ifithadauthority，wouldorderthatindividual，Ibelieve，tofindsomeothertrade：“Eloquentindividual，pleadinghereagainsttheLawsofNature，——formanyreasons，Ibidtheeclosethatmouthofthine。Enoughofbalderdashtheselong-earedhavenowdrunk。Departthou；_do_
　　somebenevolentwork；atlowest，besilent。Disappear，Isay；
　　away，andjargonnomoreinthatmanner，lestaworstthingbefallthee。“_Exeat_Fiddlestring！——Beneficentmenarenottheywhoappearonplatforms，pleadingagainsttheAlmightyMaker’sLaws；thesearethemaleficentmen，whoselipsitispitythatsomeauthoritycannotstraightwayshut。Pandora’sBoxisnotmorebalefulthanthegiftstheseeloquentbenefactorsarepressingonus。Closeyourpedler’spack，myfriend；swift，awaywithit！Pernicious，fraughtwithmerewoeandsugarypoisonisthatkindofbenevolenceandbeneficence。
　　Truly，oneofthesaddestsightsinthesetimesisthatofpoorcreatures，onplatforms，inparliamentsandothersituations，makingandunmaking“Laws；“inwhosesoul，fullofmerevacanthearsayandwindybabble，isandwasnoimageofHeaven’sLaw；
　　whomitneverstruckthatHeavenhadaLaw，orthattheEarth——couldnothavewhatkindofLawyoupleased！HumanStatute-books，accordingly，aregrowinghorribletothinkof。AnimpietyandpoisonousfutilityeveryLawofthemthatissomade；