ACTISCENEI。OrchardofOliver’shouse。EnterORLANDOandADAMORLANDOAsIremember,Adam,itwasuponthisfashionbequeathedmebywillbutpoorathousandcrowns,and,asthousayest,chargedmybrother,onhisblessing,tobreedmewell:andtherebeginsmysadness。MybrotherJaqueshekeepsatschool,andreportspeaksgoldenlyofhisprofit:formypart,hekeepsmerusticallyathome,or,tospeakmoreproperly,staysmehereathomeunkept;forcallyouthatkeepingforagentlemanofmybirth,thatdiffersnotfromthestallingofanox?Hishorsesarebredbetter;for,besidesthattheyarefairwiththeirfeeding,theyaretaughttheirmanage,andtothatendridersdearlyhired:butI,hisbrother,gainnothingunderhimbutgrowth;forthewhichhisanimalsonhisdunghillsareasmuchboundtohimasI。Besidesthisnothingthathesoplentifullygivesme,thesomethingthatnaturegavemehiscountenanceseemstotakefromme:heletsmefeedwithhishinds,barsmetheplaceofabrother,and,asmuchasinhimlies,minesmygentilitywithmyeducation。Thisisit,Adam,thatgrievesme;andthespiritofmyfather,whichI
  thinkiswithinme,beginstomutinyagainstthisservitude:Iwillnolongerendureit,thoughyetI
  knownowiseremedyhowtoavoidit。ADAMYondercomesmymaster,yourbrother。ORLANDOGoapart,Adam,andthoushalthearhowhewillshakemeup。
  EnterOLIVEROLIVERNow,sir!whatmakeyouhere?ORLANDONothing:Iamnottaughttomakeanything。OLIVERWhatmaryouthen,sir?ORLANDOMarry,sir,IamhelpingyoutomarthatwhichGodmade,apoorunworthybrotherofyours,withidleness。OLIVERMarry,sir,bebetteremployed,andbenaughtawhile。ORLANDOShallIkeepyourhogsandeathuskswiththem?
  WhatprodigalportionhaveIspent,thatIshouldcometosuchpenury?OLIVERKnowyouwhereyourare,sir?ORLANDOO,sir,verywell;hereinyourorchard。OLIVERKnowyoubeforewhom,sir?ORLANDOAy,betterthanhimIambeforeknowsme。Iknowyouaremyeldestbrother;and,inthegentleconditionofblood,youshouldsoknowme。Thecourtesyofnationsallowsyoumybetter,inthatyouarethefirst-born;butthesametraditiontakesnotawaymyblood,weretheretwentybrothersbetwixtus:Ihaveasmuchofmyfatherinmeasyou;albeit,Iconfess,yourcomingbeforemeisnearertohisreverence。OLIVERWhat,boy!ORLANDOCome,come,elderbrother,youaretooyounginthis。OLIVERWiltthoulayhandsonme,villain?ORLANDOIamnovillain;IamtheyoungestsonofSirRowlanddeBoys;hewasmyfather,andheisthriceavillainthatsayssuchafatherbegotvillains。
  Wertthounotmybrother,Iwouldnottakethishandfromthythroattillthisotherhadpulledoutthytongueforsayingso:thouhastrailedonthyself。ADAMSweetmasters,bepatient:foryourfather’sremembrance,beataccord。OLIVERLetmego,Isay。ORLANDOIwillnot,tillIplease:youshallhearme。Myfatherchargedyouinhiswilltogivemegoodeducation:youhavetrainedmelikeapeasant,obscuringandhidingfrommeallgentleman-likequalities。Thespiritofmyfathergrowsstronginme,andIwillnolongerendureit:thereforeallowmesuchexercisesasmaybecomeagentleman,orgivemethepoorallotterymyfatherleftmebytestament;withthatIwillgobuymyfortunes。OLIVERAndwhatwiltthoudo?beg,whenthatisspent?
  Well,sir,getyouin:Iwillnotlongbetroubledwithyou;youshallhavesomepartofyourwill:
  I
  prayyou,leaveme。ORLANDOIwillnofurtheroffendyouthanbecomesmeformygood。OLIVERGetyouwithhim,youolddog。ADAMIs’olddog’myreward?Mosttrue,Ihavelostmyteethinyourservice。Godbewithmyoldmaster!
  hewouldnothavespokesuchaword。
  ExeuntORLANDOandADAMOLIVERIsitevenso?beginyoutogrowuponme?Iwillphysicyourrankness,andyetgivenothousandcrownsneither。Holla,Dennis!
  EnterDENNISDENNISCallsyourworship?OLIVERWasnotCharles,theduke’swrestler,heretospeakwithme?DENNISSopleaseyou,heishereatthedoorandimportunesaccesstoyou。OLIVERCallhimin。
  ExitDENNIS
  ’Twillbeagoodway;andto-morrowthewrestlingis。
  EnterCHARLESCHARLESGoodmorrowtoyourworship。OLIVERGoodMonsieurCharles,what’sthenewnewsatthenewcourt?CHARLESThere’snonewsatthecourt,sir,buttheoldnews:
  thatis,theolddukeisbanishedbyhisyoungerbrotherthenewduke;andthreeorfourlovinglordshaveputthemselvesintovoluntaryexilewithhim,whoselandsandrevenuesenrichthenewduke;
  thereforehegivesthemgoodleavetowander。OLIVERCanyoutellifRosalind,theduke’sdaughter,bebanishedwithherfather?CHARLESO,no;fortheduke’sdaughter,hercousin,solovesher,beingeverfromtheircradlesbredtogether,thatshewouldhavefollowedherexile,orhavediedtostaybehindher。Sheisatthecourt,andnolessbelovedofherunclethanhisowndaughter;
  andnevertwoladieslovedastheydo。OLIVERWherewilltheolddukelive?CHARLESTheysayheisalreadyintheforestofArden,andamanymerrymenwithhim;andtheretheyliveliketheoldRobinHoodofEngland:theysaymanyyounggentlemenflocktohimeveryday,andfleetthetimecarelessly,astheydidinthegoldenworld。OLIVERWhat,youwrestleto-morrowbeforethenewduke?CHARLESMarry,doI,sir;andIcametoacquaintyouwithamatter。Iamgiven,sir,secretlytounderstandthatyouryoungerbrotherOrlandohathadispositiontocomeindisguisedagainstmetotryafall。
  To-morrow,sir,Iwrestleformycredit;andhethatescapesmewithoutsomebrokenlimbshallacquithimwell。Yourbrotherisbutyoungandtender;and,foryourlove,Iwouldbeloathtofoilhim,asI
  must,formyownhonour,ifhecomein:therefore,outofmylovetoyou,Icamehithertoacquaintyouwithal,thateitheryoumightstayhimfromhisintendmentorbrooksuchdisgracewellasheshallruninto,inthatitisathingofhisownsearchandaltogetheragainstmywill。OLIVERCharles,Ithanktheeforthylovetome,whichthoushaltfindIwillmostkindlyrequite。I
  hadmyselfnoticeofmybrother’spurposehereinandhavebyunderhandmeanslabouredtodissuadehimfromit,butheisresolute。I’lltellthee,Charles:
  itisthestubbornestyoungfellowofFrance,fullofambition,anenviousemulatorofeveryman’sgoodparts,asecretandvillanouscontriveragainstmehisnaturalbrother:thereforeusethydiscretion;Ihadasliefthoudidstbreakhisneckashisfinger。Andthouwertbestlookto’t;
  forifthoudosthimanyslightdisgraceorifhedonotmightilygracehimselfonthee,hewillpractiseagainsttheebypoison,entraptheebysometreacherousdeviceandneverleavetheetillhehathta’enthylifebysomeindirectmeansorother;
  for,Iassurethee,andalmostwithtearsIspeakit,thereisnotonesoyoungandsovillanousthisdayliving。Ispeakbutbrotherlyofhim;butshouldIanatomizehimtotheeasheis,Imustblushandweepandthoumustlookpaleandwonder。CHARLESIamheartilygladIcamehithertoyou。
  Ifhecometo-morrow,I’llgivehimhispayment:ifeverhegoaloneagain,I’llneverwrestleforprizemore:
  andsoGodkeepyourworship!OLIVERFarewell,goodCharles。
  ExitCHARLES
  NowwillIstirthisgamester:IhopeIshallseeanendofhim;formysoul,yetIknownotwhy,hatesnothingmorethanhe。Yethe’sgentle,neverschooledandyetlearned,fullofnobledevice,ofallsortsenchantinglybeloved,andindeedsomuchintheheartoftheworld,andespeciallyofmyownpeople,whobestknowhim,thatIamaltogethermisprised:butitshallnotbesolong;thiswrestlershallclearall:nothingremainsbutthatIkindletheboythither;whichnowI’llgoabout。
  ExitSCENEII。LawnbeforetheDuke’spalace。EnterCELIAandROSALINDCELIAIpraythee,Rosalind,sweetmycoz,bemerry。ROSALINDDearCelia,IshowmoremirththanIammistressof;
  andwouldyouyetIweremerrier?Unlessyoucouldteachmetoforgetabanishedfather,youmustnotlearnmehowtorememberanyextraordinarypleasure。CELIAHereinIseethoulovestmenotwiththefullweightthatIlovethee。Ifmyuncle,thybanishedfather,hadbanishedthyuncle,thedukemyfather,sothouhadstbeenstillwithme,Icouldhavetaughtmylovetotakethyfatherformine:sowouldstthou,ifthetruthofthylovetomeweresorighteouslytemperedasmineistothee。ROSALINDWell,Iwillforgettheconditionofmyestate,torejoiceinyours。CELIAYouknowmyfatherhathnochildbutI,nornoneisliketohave:and,truly,whenhedies,thoushaltbehisheir,forwhathehathtakenawayfromthyfatherperforce,Iwillrendertheeagaininaffection;byminehonour,Iwill;andwhenI
  breakthatoath,letmeturnmonster:therefore,mysweetRose,mydearRose,bemerry。ROSALINDFromhenceforthIwill,coz,anddevisesports。Letmesee;whatthinkyouoffallinginlove?CELIAMarry,Iprithee,do,tomakesportwithal:
  butlovenomaningoodearnest;nornofurtherinsportneitherthanwithsafetyofapureblushthoumaystinhonourcomeoffagain。ROSALINDWhatshallbeoursport,then?CELIALetussitandmockthegoodhousewifeFortunefromherwheel,thathergiftsmayhenceforthbebestowedequally。ROSALINDIwouldwecoulddoso,forherbenefitsaremightilymisplaced,andthebountifulblindwomandothmostmistakeinhergiftstowomen。CELIA’Tistrue;forthosethatshemakesfairshescarcemakeshonest,andthosethatshemakeshonestshemakesveryill-favouredly。ROSALINDNay,nowthougoestfromFortune’sofficetoNature’s:Fortunereignsingiftsoftheworld,notinthelineamentsofNature。
  EnterTOUCHSTONECELIANo?whenNaturehathmadeafaircreature,mayshenotbyFortunefallintothefire?ThoughNaturehathgivenuswittofloutatFortune,hathnotFortunesentinthisfooltocutofftheargument?ROSALINDIndeed,thereisFortunetoohardforNature,whenFortunemakesNature’snaturalthecutter-offofNature’swit。CELIAPeradventurethisisnotFortune’sworkneither,butNature’s;whoperceivethournaturalwitstoodulltoreasonofsuchgoddessesandhathsentthisnaturalforourwhetstone;foralwaysthedulnessofthefoolisthewhetstoneofthewits。Hownow,wit!whitherwanderyou?TOUCHSTONEMistress,youmustcomeawaytoyourfather。CELIAWereyoumadethemessenger?TOUCHSTONENo,byminehonour,butIwasbidtocomeforyou。ROSALINDWherelearnedyouthatoath,fool?TOUCHSTONEOfacertainknightthatsworebyhishonourtheyweregoodpancakesandsworebyhishonourthemustardwasnaught:nowI’llstandtoit,thepancakeswerenaughtandthemustardwasgood,andyetwasnottheknightforsworn。CELIAHowproveyouthat,inthegreatheapofyourknowledge?ROSALINDAy,marry,nowunmuzzleyourwisdom。TOUCHSTONEStandyoubothforthnow:strokeyourchins,andswearbyyourbeardsthatIamaknave。CELIAByourbeards,ifwehadthem,thouart。TOUCHSTONEBymyknavery,ifIhadit,thenIwere;
  butifyouswearbythatthatisnot,youarenotforsworn:
  nomorewasthisknightswearingbyhishonour,forheneverhadany;orifhehad,hehadswornitawaybeforeeverhesawthosepancakesorthatmustard。CELIAPrithee,whois’tthatthoumeanest?TOUCHSTONEOnethatoldFrederick,yourfather,loves。CELIAMyfather’sloveisenoughtohonourhim:
  enough!
  speaknomoreofhim;you’llbewhippedfortaxationoneofthesedays。TOUCHSTONEThemorepity,thatfoolsmaynotspeakwiselywhatwisemendofoolishly。CELIABymytroth,thousayesttrue;forsincethelittlewitthatfoolshavewassilenced,thelittlefoolerythatwisemenhavemakesagreatshow。HerecomesMonsieurLeBeau。ROSALINDWithhismouthfullofnews。CELIAWhichhewillputonus,aspigeonsfeedtheiryoung。ROSALINDThenshallwebenews-crammed。CELIAAllthebetter;weshallbethemoremarketable。
  EnterLEBEAU
  Bonjour,MonsieurLeBeau:what’sthenews?LEBEAUFairprincess,youhavelostmuchgoodsport。CELIASport!ofwhatcolour?LEBEAUWhatcolour,madam!howshallIansweryou?ROSALINDAswitandfortunewill。TOUCHSTONEOrastheDestiniesdecree。CELIAWellsaid:thatwaslaidonwithatrowel。TOUCHSTONENay,ifIkeepnotmyrank,——ROSALINDThoulosestthyoldsmell。LEBEAUYouamazeme,ladies:Iwouldhavetoldyouofgoodwrestling,whichyouhavelostthesightof。ROSALINDYoutellusthemannerofthewrestling。LEBEAUIwilltellyouthebeginning;and,ifitpleaseyourladyships,youmayseetheend;forthebestisyettodo;andhere,whereyouare,theyarecomingtoperformit。CELIAWell,thebeginning,thatisdeadandburied。LEBEAUTherecomesanoldmanandhisthreesons,——CELIAIcouldmatchthisbeginningwithanoldtale。LEBEAUThreeproperyoungmen,ofexcellentgrowthandpresence。ROSALINDWithbillsontheirnecks,’Beitknownuntoallmenbythesepresents。’LEBEAUTheeldestofthethreewrestledwithCharles,theduke’swrestler;whichCharlesinamomentthrewhimandbrokethreeofhisribs,thatthereislittlehopeoflifeinhim:soheservedthesecond,andsothethird。Yondertheylie;thepooroldman,theirfather,makingsuchpitifuldoleoverthemthatallthebeholderstakehispartwithweeping。ROSALINDAlas!TOUCHSTONEButwhatisthesport,monsieur,thattheladieshavelost?LEBEAUWhy,thisthatIspeakof。TOUCHSTONEThusmenmaygrowwisereveryday:itisthefirsttimethateverIheardbreakingofribswassportforladies。CELIAOrI,Ipromisethee。ROSALINDButisthereanyelselongstoseethisbrokenmusicinhissides?isthereyetanotherdotesuponrib-breaking?Shallweseethiswrestling,cousin?LEBEAUYoumust,ifyoustayhere;forhereistheplaceappointedforthewrestling,andtheyarereadytoperformit。CELIAYonder,sure,theyarecoming:letusnowstayandseeit。
  Flourish。EnterDUKEFREDERICK,Lords,ORLANDO,CHARLES,andAttendantsDUKEFREDERICKComeon:sincetheyouthwillnotbeentreated,hisownperilonhisforwardness。ROSALINDIsyondertheman?LEBEAUEvenhe,madam。CELIAAlas,heistooyoung!yethelookssuccessfully。DUKEFREDERICKHownow,daughterandcousin!areyoucrepthithertoseethewrestling?ROSALINDAy,myliege,sopleaseyougiveusleave。DUKEFREDERICKYouwilltakelittledelightinit,I
  cantellyou;
  thereissuchoddsintheman。Inpityofthechallenger’syouthIwouldfaindissuadehim,buthewillnotbeentreated。Speaktohim,ladies;
  seeifyoucanmovehim。CELIACallhimhither,goodMonsieurLeBeau。DUKEFREDERICKDoso:I’llnotbeby。LEBEAUMonsieurthechallenger,theprincessescallforyou。ORLANDOIattendthemwithallrespectandduty。ROSALINDYoungman,haveyouchallengedCharlesthewrestler?ORLANDONo,fairprincess;heisthegeneralchallenger:I
  comebutin,asothersdo,totrywithhimthestrengthofmyyouth。CELIAYounggentleman,yourspiritsaretooboldforyouryears。Youhaveseencruelproofofthisman’sstrength:ifyousawyourselfwithyoureyesorknewyourselfwithyourjudgment,thefearofyouradventurewouldcounselyoutoamoreequalenterprise。Weprayyou,foryourownsake,toembraceyourownsafetyandgiveoverthisattempt。ROSALINDDo,youngsir;yourreputationshallnotthereforebemisprised:wewillmakeitoursuittothedukethatthewrestlingmightnotgoforward。ORLANDOIbeseechyou,punishmenotwithyourhardthoughts;whereinIconfessmemuchguilty,todenysofairandexcellentladiesanything。Butletyourfaireyesandgentlewishesgowithmetomytrial:whereinifIbefoiled,thereisbutoneshamedthatwasnevergracious;ifkilled,butonedeadthatwaswillingtobeso:Ishalldomyfriendsnowrong,forIhavenonetolamentme,theworldnoinjury,forinitIhavenothing;onlyintheworldIfillupaplace,whichmaybebettersuppliedwhenIhavemadeitempty。ROSALINDThelittlestrengththatIhave,Iwoulditwerewithyou。CELIAAndmine,toekeouthers。ROSALINDFareyouwell:prayheavenIbedeceivedinyou!CELIAYourheart’sdesiresbewithyou!CHARLESCome,whereisthisyounggallantthatissodesiroustoliewithhismotherearth?ORLANDOReady,sir;buthiswillhathinitamoremodestworking。DUKEFREDERICKYoushalltrybutonefall。CHARLESNo,Iwarrantyourgrace,youshallnotentreathimtoasecond,thathavesomightilypersuadedhimfromafirst。ORLANDOAnyoumeantomockmeafter,youshouldnothavemockedmebefore:butcomeyourways。ROSALINDNowHerculesbethyspeed,youngman!CELIAIwouldIwereinvisible,tocatchthestrongfellowbytheleg。
  TheywrestleROSALINDOexcellentyoungman!CELIAIfIhadathunderboltinmineeye,I
  cantellwhoshoulddown。
  Shout。CHARLESisthrownDUKEFREDERICKNomore,nomore。ORLANDOYes,Ibeseechyourgrace:Iamnotyetwellbreathed。DUKEFREDERICKHowdostthou,Charles?LEBEAUHecannotspeak,mylord。DUKEFREDERICKBearhimaway。Whatisthyname,youngman?ORLANDOOrlando,myliege;theyoungestsonofSirRowlanddeBoys。DUKEFREDERICKIwouldthouhadstbeensontosomemanelse:
  Theworldesteem’dthyfatherhonourable,ButIdidfindhimstillmineenemy:
  Thoushouldsthavebetterpleasedmewiththisdeed,Hadstthoudescendedfromanotherhouse。
  Butfaretheewell;thouartagallantyouth:
  Iwouldthouhadsttoldmeofanotherfather。
  ExeuntDUKEFREDERICK,train,andLEBEAUCELIAWereImyfather,coz,wouldIdothis?ORLANDOIammoreproudtobeSirRowland’sson,Hisyoungestson;andwouldnotchangethatcalling,TobeadoptedheirtoFrederick。ROSALINDMyfatherlovedSirRowlandashissoul,Andalltheworldwasofmyfather’smind:
  HadIbeforeknownthisyoungmanhisson,Ishouldhavegivenhimtearsuntoentreaties,Ereheshouldthushaveventured。CELIAGentlecousin,Letusgothankhimandencouragehim:
  Myfather’sroughandenviousdispositionSticksmeatheart。Sir,youhavewelldeserved:
  IfyoudokeepyourpromisesinloveButjustly,asyouhaveexceededallpromise,Yourmistressshallbehappy。ROSALINDGentleman,GivinghimachainfromherneckWearthisforme,oneoutofsuitswithfortune,Thatcouldgivemore,butthatherhandlacksmeans。
  Shallwego,coz?CELIAAy。Fareyouwell,fairgentleman。ORLANDOCanInotsay,Ithankyou?MybetterpartsAreallthrowndown,andthatwhichherestandsupIsbutaquintain,amerelifelessblock。ROSALINDHecallsusback:mypridefellwithmyfortunes;
  I’llaskhimwhathewould。Didyoucall,sir?
  Sir,youhavewrestledwellandoverthrownMorethanyourenemies。CELIAWillyougo,coz?ROSALINDHavewithyou。Fareyouwell。
  ExeuntROSALINDandCELIAORLANDOWhatpassionhangstheseweightsuponmytongue?
  Icannotspeaktoher,yetsheurgedconference。
  OpoorOrlando,thouartoverthrown!
  OrCharlesorsomethingweakermastersthee。
  Re-enterLEBEAULEBEAUGoodsir,IdoinfriendshipcounselyouToleavethisplace。AlbeityouhavedeservedHighcommendation,trueapplauseandlove,Yetsuchisnowtheduke’sconditionThathemisconstruesallthatyouhavedone。
  Thedukeishumorous;whatheisindeed,MoresuitsyoutoconceivethanItospeakof。ORLANDOIthankyou,sir:and,prayyou,tellmethis:
  WhichofthetwowasdaughterofthedukeThatherewasatthewrestling?LEBEAUNeitherhisdaughter,ifwejudgebymanners;
  ButyetindeedthelesserishisdaughterTheotherisdaughtertothebanish’dduke,Andheredetain’dbyherusurpinguncle,Tokeephisdaughtercompany;whoselovesAredearerthanthenaturalbondofsisters。
  ButIcantellyouthatoflatethisdukeHathta’endispleasure’gainsthisgentleniece,GroundeduponnootherargumentButthatthepeoplepraiseherforhervirtuesAndpityherforhergoodfather’ssake;
  And,onmylife,hismalice’gainsttheladyWillsuddenlybreakforth。Sir,fareyouwell:
  Hereafter,inabetterworldthanthis,Ishalldesiremoreloveandknowledgeofyou。ORLANDOIrestmuchboundentoyou:fareyouwell。
  ExitLEBEAU
  ThusmustIfromthesmokeintothesmother;
  Fromtyrantdukeuntoatyrantbrother:
  ButheavenlyRosalind!
  ExitSCENEIII。Aroominthepalace。EnterCELIAandROSALINDCELIAWhy,cousin!why,Rosalind!Cupidhavemercy!notaword?ROSALINDNotonetothrowatadog。CELIANo,thywordsaretooprecioustobecastawayuponcurs;throwsomeofthematme;come,lamemewithreasons。ROSALINDThenthereweretwocousinslaidup;whentheoneshouldbelamedwithreasonsandtheothermadwithoutany。CELIAButisallthisforyourfather?ROSALINDNo,someofitisformychild’sfather。
  O,howfullofbriersisthisworking-dayworld!CELIATheyarebutburs,cousin,thrownupontheeinholidayfoolery:ifwewalknotinthetroddenpathsourverypetticoatswillcatchthem。ROSALINDIcouldshakethemoffmycoat:thesebursareinmyheart。CELIAHemthemaway。ROSALINDIwouldtry,ifIcouldcry’hem’andhavehim。CELIACome,come,wrestlewiththyaffections。ROSALINDO,theytakethepartofabetterwrestlerthanmyself!CELIAO,agoodwishuponyou!youwilltryintime,indespiteofafall。But,turningthesejestsoutofservice,letustalkingoodearnest:isitpossible,onsuchasudden,youshouldfallintosostrongalikingwitholdSirRowland’syoungestson?ROSALINDThedukemyfatherlovedhisfatherdearly。CELIADothitthereforeensuethatyoushouldlovehissondearly?Bythiskindofchase,Ishouldhatehim,formyfatherhatedhisfatherdearly;yetIhatenotOrlando。ROSALINDNo,faith,hatehimnot,formysake。CELIAWhyshouldInot?dothhenotdeservewell?ROSALINDLetmelovehimforthat,anddoyoulovehimbecauseIdo。Look,herecomestheduke。CELIAWithhiseyesfullofanger。
  EnterDUKEFREDERICK,withLordsDUKEFREDERICKMistress,dispatchyouwithyoursafesthasteAndgetyoufromourcourt。ROSALINDMe,uncle?DUKEFREDERICKYou,cousinWithinthesetendaysifthatthoube’stfoundSonearourpubliccourtastwentymiles,Thoudiestforit。ROSALINDIdobeseechyourgrace,Letmetheknowledgeofmyfaultbearwithme:
  IfwithmyselfIholdintelligenceOrhaveacquaintancewithmineowndesires,IfthatIdonotdreamorbenotfrantic,——
  AsIdotrustIamnot——then,dearuncle,NeversomuchasinathoughtunbornDidIoffendyourhighness。DUKEFREDERICKThusdoalltraitors:
  Iftheirpurgationdidconsistinwords,Theyareasinnocentasgraceitself:
  LetitsufficetheethatItrusttheenot。ROSALINDYetyourmistrustcannotmakemeatraitor:
  Tellmewhereonthelikelihooddepends。DUKEFREDERICKThouartthyfather’sdaughter;there’senough。ROSALINDSowasIwhenyourhighnesstookhisdukedom;
  SowasIwhenyourhighnessbanish’dhim:
  Treasonisnotinherited,mylord;
  Or,ifwedidderiveitfromourfriends,What’sthattome?myfatherwasnotraitor:
  Then,goodmyliege,mistakemenotsomuchTothinkmypovertyistreacherous。CELIADearsovereign,hearmespeak。DUKEFREDERICKAy,Celia;westay’dherforyoursake,Elsehadshewithherfatherrangedalong。CELIAIdidnotthenentreattohaveherstay;
  Itwasyourpleasureandyourownremorse:
  Iwastooyoungthattimetovalueher;
  ButnowIknowher:ifshebeatraitor,WhysoamI;westillhaveslepttogether,Roseataninstant,learn’d,play’d,eattogether,Andwheresoeverwewent,likeJuno’sswans,Stillwewentcoupledandinseparable。DUKEFREDERICKSheistoosubtleforthee;andhersmoothness,HerverysilenceandherpatienceSpeaktothepeople,andtheypityher。
  Thouartafool:sherobstheeofthyname;
  AndthouwiltshowmorebrightandseemmorevirtuousWhensheisgone。Thenopennotthylips:
  FirmandirrevocableismydoomWhichIhavepass’duponher;sheisbanish’d。CELIAPronouncethatsentencethenonme,myliege:
  Icannotliveoutofhercompany。DUKEFREDERICKYouareafool。You,niece,provideyourself:
  Ifyououtstaythetime,uponminehonour,Andinthegreatnessofmyword,youdie。
  ExeuntDUKEFREDERICKandLordsCELIAOmypoorRosalind,whitherwiltthougo?
  Wiltthouchangefathers?Iwillgivetheemine。
  Ichargethee,benotthoumoregrievedthanI
  am。ROSALINDIhavemorecause。CELIAThouhastnot,cousin;
  Pritheebecheerful:know’stthounot,thedukeHathbanish’dme,hisdaughter?ROSALINDThathehathnot。CELIANo,hathnot?RosalindlacksthentheloveWhichteacheththeethatthouandIamone:
  Shallwebesunder’d?shallwepart,sweetgirl?
  No:letmyfatherseekanotherheir。
  Thereforedevisewithmehowwemayfly,Whithertogoandwhattobearwithus;
  Anddonotseektotakeyourchangeuponyou,Tobearyourgriefsyourselfandleavemeout;
  For,bythisheaven,nowatoursorrowspale,Saywhatthoucanst,I’llgoalongwiththee。ROSALINDWhy,whithershallwego?CELIAToseekmyuncleintheforestofArden。ROSALINDAlas,whatdangerwillitbetous,Maidsasweare,totravelforthsofar!
  Beautyprovokeththievessoonerthangold。CELIAI’llputmyselfinpoorandmeanattireAndwithakindofumbersmirchmyface;
  Thelikedoyou:soshallwepassalongAndneverstirassailants。ROSALINDWereitnotbetter,BecausethatIammorethancommontall,ThatIdidsuitmeallpointslikeaman?
  Agallantcurtle-axeuponmythigh,Aboar-spearinmyhand;and——inmyheartLietherewhathiddenwoman’sfeartherewill——
  We’llhaveaswashingandamartialoutside,AsmanyothermannishcowardshaveThatdooutfaceitwiththeirsemblances。CELIAWhatshallIcalltheewhenthouartaman?ROSALINDI’llhavenoworseanamethanJove’sownpage;
  AndthereforelookyoucallmeGanymede。
  Butwhatwillyoubecall’d?CELIASomethingthathathareferencetomystateNolongerCelia,butAliena。ROSALINDBut,cousin,whatifweassay’dtostealTheclownishfooloutofyourfather’scourt?
  Wouldhenotbeacomforttoourtravel?CELIAHe’llgoalongo’erthewideworldwithme;
  Leavemealonetowoohim。Let’saway,Andgetourjewelsandourwealthtogether,DevisethefittesttimeandsafestwayTohideusfrompursuitthatwillbemadeAftermyflight。NowgoweincontentTolibertyandnottobanishment。
  ExeuntACTIISCENEI。TheForestofArden。EnterDUKESENIOR,AMIENS,andtwoorthreeLords,likeforestersDUKESENIORNow,myco-matesandbrothersinexile,HathnotoldcustommadethislifemoresweetThanthatofpaintedpomp?ArenotthesewoodsMorefreefromperilthantheenviouscourt?
  HerefeelwebutthepenaltyofAdam,Theseasons’difference,astheicyfangAndchurlishchidingofthewinter’swind,Which,whenitbitesandblowsuponmybody,EventillIshrinkwithcold,Ismileandsay’Thisisnoflattery:thesearecounsellorsThatfeelinglypersuademewhatIam。’
  Sweetaretheusesofadversity,Which,likethetoad,uglyandvenomous,Wearsyetapreciousjewelinhishead;
  AndthisourlifeexemptfrompublichauntFindstonguesintrees,booksintherunningbrooks,Sermonsinstonesandgoodineverything。
  Iwouldnotchangeit。AMIENSHappyisyourgrace,ThatcantranslatethestubbornnessoffortuneIntosoquietandsosweetastyle。DUKESENIORCome,shallwegoandkillusvenison?
  Andyetitirksmethepoordappledfools,Beingnativeburghersofthisdesertcity,ShouldintheirownconfineswithforkedheadsHavetheirroundhaunchesgored。FirstLordIndeed,mylord,ThemelancholyJaquesgrievesatthat,And,inthatkind,swearsyoudomoreusurpThandothyourbrotherthathathbanish’dyou。
  To-daymyLordofAmiensandmyselfDidstealbehindhimashelayalongUnderanoakwhoseantiquerootpeepsoutUponthebrookthatbrawlsalongthiswood:
  Tothewhichplaceapoorsequester’dstag,Thatfromthehunter’saimhadta’enahurt,Didcometolanguish,andindeed,mylord,ThewretchedanimalheavedforthsuchgroansThattheirdischargedidstretchhisleatherncoatAlmosttobursting,andthebigroundtearsCoursedoneanotherdownhisinnocentnoseInpiteouschase;andthusthehairyfoolMuchmarkedofthemelancholyJaques,Stoodontheextremestvergeoftheswiftbrook,Augmentingitwithtears。DUKESENIORButwhatsaidJaques?
  Didhenotmoralizethisspectacle?FirstLordO,yes,intoathousandsimiles。
  First,forhisweepingintotheneedlessstream;
  ’Poordeer,’quothhe,’thoumakestatestamentAsworldlingsdo,givingthysumofmoreTothatwhichhadtoomuch:’then,beingtherealone,Leftandabandon’dofhisvelvetfriends,’’Tisright:’quothhe;’thusmiserydothpartThefluxofcompany:’anonacarelessherd,Fullofthepasture,jumpsalongbyhimAndneverstaystogreethim;’Ay’quothJaques,’Sweepon,youfatandgreasycitizens;
  ’Tisjustthefashion:whereforedoyoulookUponthatpoorandbrokenbankruptthere?’
  ThusmostinvectivelyhepierceththroughThebodyofthecountry,city,court,Yea,andofthisourlife,swearingthatweAremereusurpers,tyrantsandwhat’sworse,TofrighttheanimalsandtokillthemupIntheirassign’dandnativedwelling-place。DUKESENIORAnddidyouleavehiminthiscontemplation?SecondLordWedid,mylord,weepingandcommentingUponthesobbingdeer。DUKESENIORShowmetheplace:
  Ilovetocopehiminthesesullenfits,Forthenhe’sfullofmatter。FirstLordI’llbringyoutohimstraight。
  ExeuntSCENEII。Aroominthepalace。EnterDUKEFREDERICK,withLordsDUKEFREDERICKCanitbepossiblethatnomansawthem?
  Itcannotbe:somevillainsofmycourtAreofconsentandsufferanceinthis。FirstLordIcannothearofanythatdidseeher。
  Theladies,herattendantsofherchamber,Sawherabed,andinthemorningearlyTheyfoundthebeduntreasuredoftheirmistress。SecondLordMylord,theroynishclown,atwhomsooftYourgracewaswonttolaugh,isalsomissing。
  Hisperia,theprincess’gentlewoman,Confessesthatshesecretlyo’erheardYourdaughterandhercousinmuchcommendThepartsandgracesofthewrestlerThatdidbutlatelyfoilthesinewyCharles;
  Andshebelieves,wherevertheyaregone,Thatyouthissurelyintheircompany。DUKEFREDERICKSendtohisbrother;fetchthatgallanthither;
  Ifhebeabsent,bringhisbrothertome;
  I’llmakehimfindhim:dothissuddenly,AndletnotsearchandinquisitionquailTobringagainthesefoolishrunaways。
  ExeuntSCENEIII。BeforeOLIVER’Shouse。EnterORLANDOandADAM,meetingORLANDOWho’sthere?ADAMWhat,myyoungmaster?O,mygentlemaster!
  Omysweetmaster!OyoumemoryOfoldSirRowland!why,whatmakeyouhere?
  Whyareyouvirtuous?whydopeopleloveyou?
  Andwhereforeareyougentle,strongandvaliant?
  WhywouldyoubesofondtoovercomeThebonnypriserofthehumorousduke?
  Yourpraiseiscometooswiftlyhomebeforeyou。
  Knowyounot,master,tosomekindofmenTheirgracesservethembutasenemies?
  Nomoredoyours:yourvirtues,gentlemaster,Aresanctifiedandholytraitorstoyou。
  O,whataworldisthis,whenwhatiscomelyEnvenomshimthatbearsit!ORLANDOWhy,what’sthematter?ADAMOunhappyyouth!
  Comenotwithinthesedoors;withinthisroofTheenemyofallyourgraceslives:
  Yourbrother——no,nobrother;yettheson——
  Yetnottheson,IwillnotcallhimsonOfhimIwasabouttocallhisfather——
  Hathheardyourpraises,andthisnighthemeansToburnthelodgingwhereyouusetolieAndyouwithinit:ifhefailofthat,Hewillhaveothermeanstocutyouoff。
  Ioverheardhimandhispractises。
  Thisisnoplace;thishouseisbutabutchery:
  Abhorit,fearit,donotenterit。ORLANDOWhy,whither,Adam,wouldstthouhavemego?ADAMNomatterwhither,soyoucomenothere。ORLANDOWhat,wouldstthouhavemegoandbegmyfood?
  OrwithabaseandboisterousswordenforceAthievishlivingonthecommonroad?
  ThisImustdo,orknownotwhattodo:
  YetthisIwillnotdo,dohowIcan;
  IratherwillsubjectmetothemaliceOfadivertedbloodandbloodybrother。ADAMButdonotso。Ihavefivehundredcrowns,ThethriftyhireIsavedunderyourfather,WhichIdidstoretobemyfoster-nurseWhenserviceshouldinmyoldlimbslielameAndunregardedageincornersthrown:
  Takethat,andHethatdoththeravensfeed,Yea,providentlycatersforthesparrow,Becomforttomyage!Hereisthegold;
  AndallthisIgiveyou。Letmebeyourservant:
  ThoughIlookold,yetIamstrongandlusty;
  ForinmyyouthIneverdidapplyHotandrebelliousliquorsinmyblood,NordidnotwithunbashfulforeheadwooThemeansofweaknessanddebility;
  Thereforemyageisasalustywinter,Frosty,butkindly:letmegowithyou;
  I’lldotheserviceofayoungermanInallyourbusinessandnecessities。ORLANDOOgoodoldman,howwellintheeappearsTheconstantserviceoftheantiqueworld,Whenservicesweatforduty,notformeed!
  Thouartnotforthefashionofthesetimes,Wherenonewillsweatbutforpromotion,Andhavingthat,dochoketheirserviceupEvenwiththehaving:itisnotsowiththee。
  But,pooroldman,thouprunestarottentree,ThatcannotsomuchasablossomyieldInlieuofallthypainsandhusbandryButcomethyways;wellgoalongtogether,Anderewehavethyyouthfulwagesspent,We’lllightuponsomesettledlowcontent。ADAMMaster,goon,andIwillfollowthee,Tothelastgasp,withtruthandloyalty。
  FromseventeenyearstillnowalmostfourscoreHerelivedI,butnowliveherenomore。
  Atseventeenyearsmanytheirfortunesseek;
  Butatfourscoreitistoolateaweek:
  YetfortunecannotrecompensemebetterThantodiewellandnotmymaster’sdebtor。
  ExeuntSCENEIV。TheForestofArden。EnterROSALINDforGanymede,CELIAforAliena,andTOUCHSTONEROSALINDOJupiter,howwearyaremyspirits!TOUCHSTONEIcarenotformyspirits,ifmylegswerenotweary。ROSALINDIcouldfindinmyhearttodisgracemyman’sapparelandtocrylikeawoman;butImustcomforttheweakervessel,asdoubletandhoseoughttoshowitselfcourageoustopetticoat:thereforecourage,goodAliena!CELIAIprayyou,bearwithme;Icannotgonofurther。TOUCHSTONEFormypart,Ihadratherbearwithyouthanbearyou;yetIshouldbearnocrossifIdidbearyou,forIthinkyouhavenomoneyinyourpurse。ROSALINDWell,thisistheforestofArden。TOUCHSTONEAy,nowamIinArden;themorefoolI;
  whenIwasathome,Iwasinabetterplace:buttravellersmustbecontent。ROSALINDAy,beso,goodTouchstone。
  EnterCORINandSILVIUS
  Lookyou,whocomeshere;ayoungmanandanoldinsolemntalk。CORINThatisthewaytomakeherscornyoustill。SILVIUSOCorin,thatthouknew’sthowIdoloveher!CORINIpartlyguess;forIhavelovederenow。SILVIUSNo,Corin,beingold,thoucanstnotguess,ThoughinthyyouththouwastastruealoverAseversigh’duponamidnightpillow:
  Butifthylovewereeverliketomine——
  AssureIthinkdidnevermanloveso——
  HowmanyactionsmostridiculousHastthoubeendrawntobythyfantasy?CORINIntoathousandthatIhaveforgotten。SILVIUSO,thoudidstthenne’erlovesoheartily!
  Ifthouremember’stnottheslightestfollyThateverlovedidmaketheeruninto,Thouhastnotloved:
  OrifthouhastnotsatasIdonow,Wearyingthyhearerinthymistress’praise,Thouhastnotloved:
  OrifthouhastnotbrokefromcompanyAbruptly,asmypassionnowmakesme,Thouhastnotloved。
  OPhebe,Phebe,Phebe!
  ExitROSALINDAlas,poorshepherd!searchingofthywound,Ihavebyhardadventurefoundmineown。TOUCHSTONEAndImine。Iremember,whenIwasinloveIbrokemysworduponastoneandbidhimtakethatforcominga-nighttoJaneSmile;andIrememberthekissingofherbatletandthecow’sdugsthatherprettychopthandshadmilked;andIrememberthewooingofapeascodinsteadofher,fromwhomItooktwocodsand,givingherthemagain,saidwithweepingtears’Weartheseformysake。’Wethataretrueloversrunintostrangecapers;butasallismortalinnature,soisallnatureinlovemortalinfolly。ROSALINDThouspeakestwiserthanthouartwareof。TOUCHSTONENay,Ishallne’erbewareofmineownwittillI
  breakmyshinsagainstit。ROSALINDJove,Jove!thisshepherd’spassionIsmuchuponmyfashion。TOUCHSTONEAndmine;butitgrowssomethingstalewithme。CELIAIprayyou,oneofyouquestionyondmanIfheforgoldwillgiveusanyfood:
  Ifaintalmosttodeath。TOUCHSTONEHolla,youclown!ROSALINDPeace,fool:he’snotthykinsman。CORINWhocalls?TOUCHSTONEYourbetters,sir。CORINElsearetheyverywretched。ROSALINDPeace,Isay。Goodeventoyou,friend。CORINAndtoyou,gentlesir,andtoyouall。ROSALINDIprithee,shepherd,ifthatloveorgoldCaninthisdesertplacebuyentertainment,Bringuswherewemayrestourselvesandfeed:
  Here’sayoungmaidwithtravelmuchoppress’dAndfaintsforsuccor。CORINFairsir,IpityherAndwish,forhersakemorethanformineown,Myfortunesweremoreabletorelieveher;
  ButIamshepherdtoanothermanAnddonotshearthefleecesthatIgraze:
  MymasterisofchurlishdispositionAndlittlereckstofindthewaytoheavenBydoingdeedsofhospitality:
  Besides,hiscote,hisflocksandboundsoffeedArenowonsale,andatoursheepcotenow,Byreasonofhisabsence,thereisnothingThatyouwillfeedon;butwhatis,comesee。
  Andinmyvoicemostwelcomeshallyoube。ROSALINDWhatishethatshallbuyhisflockandpasture?CORINThatyoungswainthatyousawherebuterewhile,Thatlittlecaresforbuyinganything。ROSALINDIpraythee,ifitstandwithhonesty,Buythouthecottage,pastureandtheflock,Andthoushalthavetopayforitofus。CELIAAndwewillmendthywages。Ilikethisplace。
  Andwillinglycouldwastemytimeinit。CORINAssuredlythethingistobesold:
  Gowithme:ifyoulikeuponreportThesoil,theprofitandthiskindoflife,IwillyourveryfaithfulfeederbeAndbuyitwithyourgoldrightsuddenly。