ACTISCENEI。OrchardofOliver’shouse。EnterORLANDOandADAMORLANDOAsIremember,Adam,itwasuponthisfashionbequeathedmebywillbutpoorathousandcrowns,and,asthousayest,chargedmybrother,onhisblessing,tobreedmewell:andtherebeginsmysadness。MybrotherJaqueshekeepsatschool,andreportspeaksgoldenlyofhisprofit:formypart,hekeepsmerusticallyathome,or,tospeakmoreproperly,staysmehereathomeunkept;forcallyouthatkeepingforagentlemanofmybirth,thatdiffersnotfromthestallingofanox?Hishorsesarebredbetter;for,besidesthattheyarefairwiththeirfeeding,theyaretaughttheirmanage,andtothatendridersdearlyhired:butI,hisbrother,gainnothingunderhimbutgrowth;forthewhichhisanimalsonhisdunghillsareasmuchboundtohimasI。Besidesthisnothingthathesoplentifullygivesme,thesomethingthatnaturegavemehiscountenanceseemstotakefromme:heletsmefeedwithhishinds,barsmetheplaceofabrother,and,asmuchasinhimlies,minesmygentilitywithmyeducation。Thisisit,Adam,thatgrievesme;andthespiritofmyfather,whichI
thinkiswithinme,beginstomutinyagainstthisservitude:Iwillnolongerendureit,thoughyetI
knownowiseremedyhowtoavoidit。ADAMYondercomesmymaster,yourbrother。ORLANDOGoapart,Adam,andthoushalthearhowhewillshakemeup。
EnterOLIVEROLIVERNow,sir!whatmakeyouhere?ORLANDONothing:Iamnottaughttomakeanything。OLIVERWhatmaryouthen,sir?ORLANDOMarry,sir,IamhelpingyoutomarthatwhichGodmade,apoorunworthybrotherofyours,withidleness。OLIVERMarry,sir,bebetteremployed,andbenaughtawhile。ORLANDOShallIkeepyourhogsandeathuskswiththem?
WhatprodigalportionhaveIspent,thatIshouldcometosuchpenury?OLIVERKnowyouwhereyourare,sir?ORLANDOO,sir,verywell;hereinyourorchard。OLIVERKnowyoubeforewhom,sir?ORLANDOAy,betterthanhimIambeforeknowsme。Iknowyouaremyeldestbrother;and,inthegentleconditionofblood,youshouldsoknowme。Thecourtesyofnationsallowsyoumybetter,inthatyouarethefirst-born;butthesametraditiontakesnotawaymyblood,weretheretwentybrothersbetwixtus:Ihaveasmuchofmyfatherinmeasyou;albeit,Iconfess,yourcomingbeforemeisnearertohisreverence。OLIVERWhat,boy!ORLANDOCome,come,elderbrother,youaretooyounginthis。OLIVERWiltthoulayhandsonme,villain?ORLANDOIamnovillain;IamtheyoungestsonofSirRowlanddeBoys;hewasmyfather,andheisthriceavillainthatsayssuchafatherbegotvillains。
Wertthounotmybrother,Iwouldnottakethishandfromthythroattillthisotherhadpulledoutthytongueforsayingso:thouhastrailedonthyself。ADAMSweetmasters,bepatient:foryourfather’sremembrance,beataccord。OLIVERLetmego,Isay。ORLANDOIwillnot,tillIplease:youshallhearme。Myfatherchargedyouinhiswilltogivemegoodeducation:youhavetrainedmelikeapeasant,obscuringandhidingfrommeallgentleman-likequalities。Thespiritofmyfathergrowsstronginme,andIwillnolongerendureit:thereforeallowmesuchexercisesasmaybecomeagentleman,orgivemethepoorallotterymyfatherleftmebytestament;withthatIwillgobuymyfortunes。OLIVERAndwhatwiltthoudo?beg,whenthatisspent?
Well,sir,getyouin:Iwillnotlongbetroubledwithyou;youshallhavesomepartofyourwill:
I
prayyou,leaveme。ORLANDOIwillnofurtheroffendyouthanbecomesmeformygood。OLIVERGetyouwithhim,youolddog。ADAMIs’olddog’myreward?Mosttrue,Ihavelostmyteethinyourservice。Godbewithmyoldmaster!
hewouldnothavespokesuchaword。
ExeuntORLANDOandADAMOLIVERIsitevenso?beginyoutogrowuponme?Iwillphysicyourrankness,andyetgivenothousandcrownsneither。Holla,Dennis!
EnterDENNISDENNISCallsyourworship?OLIVERWasnotCharles,theduke’swrestler,heretospeakwithme?DENNISSopleaseyou,heishereatthedoorandimportunesaccesstoyou。OLIVERCallhimin。
ExitDENNIS
’Twillbeagoodway;andto-morrowthewrestlingis。
EnterCHARLESCHARLESGoodmorrowtoyourworship。OLIVERGoodMonsieurCharles,what’sthenewnewsatthenewcourt?CHARLESThere’snonewsatthecourt,sir,buttheoldnews:
thatis,theolddukeisbanishedbyhisyoungerbrotherthenewduke;andthreeorfourlovinglordshaveputthemselvesintovoluntaryexilewithhim,whoselandsandrevenuesenrichthenewduke;
thereforehegivesthemgoodleavetowander。OLIVERCanyoutellifRosalind,theduke’sdaughter,bebanishedwithherfather?CHARLESO,no;fortheduke’sdaughter,hercousin,solovesher,beingeverfromtheircradlesbredtogether,thatshewouldhavefollowedherexile,orhavediedtostaybehindher。Sheisatthecourt,andnolessbelovedofherunclethanhisowndaughter;
andnevertwoladieslovedastheydo。OLIVERWherewilltheolddukelive?CHARLESTheysayheisalreadyintheforestofArden,andamanymerrymenwithhim;andtheretheyliveliketheoldRobinHoodofEngland:theysaymanyyounggentlemenflocktohimeveryday,andfleetthetimecarelessly,astheydidinthegoldenworld。OLIVERWhat,youwrestleto-morrowbeforethenewduke?CHARLESMarry,doI,sir;andIcametoacquaintyouwithamatter。Iamgiven,sir,secretlytounderstandthatyouryoungerbrotherOrlandohathadispositiontocomeindisguisedagainstmetotryafall。
To-morrow,sir,Iwrestleformycredit;andhethatescapesmewithoutsomebrokenlimbshallacquithimwell。Yourbrotherisbutyoungandtender;and,foryourlove,Iwouldbeloathtofoilhim,asI
must,formyownhonour,ifhecomein:therefore,outofmylovetoyou,Icamehithertoacquaintyouwithal,thateitheryoumightstayhimfromhisintendmentorbrooksuchdisgracewellasheshallruninto,inthatitisathingofhisownsearchandaltogetheragainstmywill。OLIVERCharles,Ithanktheeforthylovetome,whichthoushaltfindIwillmostkindlyrequite。I
hadmyselfnoticeofmybrother’spurposehereinandhavebyunderhandmeanslabouredtodissuadehimfromit,butheisresolute。I’lltellthee,Charles:
itisthestubbornestyoungfellowofFrance,fullofambition,anenviousemulatorofeveryman’sgoodparts,asecretandvillanouscontriveragainstmehisnaturalbrother:thereforeusethydiscretion;Ihadasliefthoudidstbreakhisneckashisfinger。Andthouwertbestlookto’t;
forifthoudosthimanyslightdisgraceorifhedonotmightilygracehimselfonthee,hewillpractiseagainsttheebypoison,entraptheebysometreacherousdeviceandneverleavetheetillhehathta’enthylifebysomeindirectmeansorother;
for,Iassurethee,andalmostwithtearsIspeakit,thereisnotonesoyoungandsovillanousthisdayliving。Ispeakbutbrotherlyofhim;butshouldIanatomizehimtotheeasheis,Imustblushandweepandthoumustlookpaleandwonder。CHARLESIamheartilygladIcamehithertoyou。
Ifhecometo-morrow,I’llgivehimhispayment:ifeverhegoaloneagain,I’llneverwrestleforprizemore:
andsoGodkeepyourworship!OLIVERFarewell,goodCharles。
ExitCHARLES
NowwillIstirthisgamester:IhopeIshallseeanendofhim;formysoul,yetIknownotwhy,hatesnothingmorethanhe。Yethe’sgentle,neverschooledandyetlearned,fullofnobledevice,ofallsortsenchantinglybeloved,andindeedsomuchintheheartoftheworld,andespeciallyofmyownpeople,whobestknowhim,thatIamaltogethermisprised:butitshallnotbesolong;thiswrestlershallclearall:nothingremainsbutthatIkindletheboythither;whichnowI’llgoabout。
ExitSCENEII。LawnbeforetheDuke’spalace。EnterCELIAandROSALINDCELIAIpraythee,Rosalind,sweetmycoz,bemerry。ROSALINDDearCelia,IshowmoremirththanIammistressof;
andwouldyouyetIweremerrier?Unlessyoucouldteachmetoforgetabanishedfather,youmustnotlearnmehowtorememberanyextraordinarypleasure。CELIAHereinIseethoulovestmenotwiththefullweightthatIlovethee。Ifmyuncle,thybanishedfather,hadbanishedthyuncle,thedukemyfather,sothouhadstbeenstillwithme,Icouldhavetaughtmylovetotakethyfatherformine:sowouldstthou,ifthetruthofthylovetomeweresorighteouslytemperedasmineistothee。ROSALINDWell,Iwillforgettheconditionofmyestate,torejoiceinyours。CELIAYouknowmyfatherhathnochildbutI,nornoneisliketohave:and,truly,whenhedies,thoushaltbehisheir,forwhathehathtakenawayfromthyfatherperforce,Iwillrendertheeagaininaffection;byminehonour,Iwill;andwhenI
breakthatoath,letmeturnmonster:therefore,mysweetRose,mydearRose,bemerry。ROSALINDFromhenceforthIwill,coz,anddevisesports。Letmesee;whatthinkyouoffallinginlove?CELIAMarry,Iprithee,do,tomakesportwithal:
butlovenomaningoodearnest;nornofurtherinsportneitherthanwithsafetyofapureblushthoumaystinhonourcomeoffagain。ROSALINDWhatshallbeoursport,then?CELIALetussitandmockthegoodhousewifeFortunefromherwheel,thathergiftsmayhenceforthbebestowedequally。ROSALINDIwouldwecoulddoso,forherbenefitsaremightilymisplaced,andthebountifulblindwomandothmostmistakeinhergiftstowomen。CELIA’Tistrue;forthosethatshemakesfairshescarcemakeshonest,andthosethatshemakeshonestshemakesveryill-favouredly。ROSALINDNay,nowthougoestfromFortune’sofficetoNature’s:Fortunereignsingiftsoftheworld,notinthelineamentsofNature。
EnterTOUCHSTONECELIANo?whenNaturehathmadeafaircreature,mayshenotbyFortunefallintothefire?ThoughNaturehathgivenuswittofloutatFortune,hathnotFortunesentinthisfooltocutofftheargument?ROSALINDIndeed,thereisFortunetoohardforNature,whenFortunemakesNature’snaturalthecutter-offofNature’swit。CELIAPeradventurethisisnotFortune’sworkneither,butNature’s;whoperceivethournaturalwitstoodulltoreasonofsuchgoddessesandhathsentthisnaturalforourwhetstone;foralwaysthedulnessofthefoolisthewhetstoneofthewits。Hownow,wit!whitherwanderyou?TOUCHSTONEMistress,youmustcomeawaytoyourfather。CELIAWereyoumadethemessenger?TOUCHSTONENo,byminehonour,butIwasbidtocomeforyou。ROSALINDWherelearnedyouthatoath,fool?TOUCHSTONEOfacertainknightthatsworebyhishonourtheyweregoodpancakesandsworebyhishonourthemustardwasnaught:nowI’llstandtoit,thepancakeswerenaughtandthemustardwasgood,andyetwasnottheknightforsworn。CELIAHowproveyouthat,inthegreatheapofyourknowledge?ROSALINDAy,marry,nowunmuzzleyourwisdom。TOUCHSTONEStandyoubothforthnow:strokeyourchins,andswearbyyourbeardsthatIamaknave。CELIAByourbeards,ifwehadthem,thouart。TOUCHSTONEBymyknavery,ifIhadit,thenIwere;
butifyouswearbythatthatisnot,youarenotforsworn:
nomorewasthisknightswearingbyhishonour,forheneverhadany;orifhehad,hehadswornitawaybeforeeverhesawthosepancakesorthatmustard。CELIAPrithee,whois’tthatthoumeanest?TOUCHSTONEOnethatoldFrederick,yourfather,loves。CELIAMyfather’sloveisenoughtohonourhim:
enough!
speaknomoreofhim;you’llbewhippedfortaxationoneofthesedays。TOUCHSTONEThemorepity,thatfoolsmaynotspeakwiselywhatwisemendofoolishly。CELIABymytroth,thousayesttrue;forsincethelittlewitthatfoolshavewassilenced,thelittlefoolerythatwisemenhavemakesagreatshow。HerecomesMonsieurLeBeau。ROSALINDWithhismouthfullofnews。CELIAWhichhewillputonus,aspigeonsfeedtheiryoung。ROSALINDThenshallwebenews-crammed。CELIAAllthebetter;weshallbethemoremarketable。
EnterLEBEAU
Bonjour,MonsieurLeBeau:what’sthenews?LEBEAUFairprincess,youhavelostmuchgoodsport。CELIASport!ofwhatcolour?LEBEAUWhatcolour,madam!howshallIansweryou?ROSALINDAswitandfortunewill。TOUCHSTONEOrastheDestiniesdecree。CELIAWellsaid:thatwaslaidonwithatrowel。TOUCHSTONENay,ifIkeepnotmyrank,——ROSALINDThoulosestthyoldsmell。LEBEAUYouamazeme,ladies:Iwouldhavetoldyouofgoodwrestling,whichyouhavelostthesightof。ROSALINDYoutellusthemannerofthewrestling。LEBEAUIwilltellyouthebeginning;and,ifitpleaseyourladyships,youmayseetheend;forthebestisyettodo;andhere,whereyouare,theyarecomingtoperformit。CELIAWell,thebeginning,thatisdeadandburied。LEBEAUTherecomesanoldmanandhisthreesons,——CELIAIcouldmatchthisbeginningwithanoldtale。LEBEAUThreeproperyoungmen,ofexcellentgrowthandpresence。ROSALINDWithbillsontheirnecks,’Beitknownuntoallmenbythesepresents。’LEBEAUTheeldestofthethreewrestledwithCharles,theduke’swrestler;whichCharlesinamomentthrewhimandbrokethreeofhisribs,thatthereislittlehopeoflifeinhim:soheservedthesecond,andsothethird。Yondertheylie;thepooroldman,theirfather,makingsuchpitifuldoleoverthemthatallthebeholderstakehispartwithweeping。ROSALINDAlas!TOUCHSTONEButwhatisthesport,monsieur,thattheladieshavelost?LEBEAUWhy,thisthatIspeakof。TOUCHSTONEThusmenmaygrowwisereveryday:itisthefirsttimethateverIheardbreakingofribswassportforladies。CELIAOrI,Ipromisethee。ROSALINDButisthereanyelselongstoseethisbrokenmusicinhissides?isthereyetanotherdotesuponrib-breaking?Shallweseethiswrestling,cousin?LEBEAUYoumust,ifyoustayhere;forhereistheplaceappointedforthewrestling,andtheyarereadytoperformit。CELIAYonder,sure,theyarecoming:letusnowstayandseeit。
Flourish。EnterDUKEFREDERICK,Lords,ORLANDO,CHARLES,andAttendantsDUKEFREDERICKComeon:sincetheyouthwillnotbeentreated,hisownperilonhisforwardness。ROSALINDIsyondertheman?LEBEAUEvenhe,madam。CELIAAlas,heistooyoung!yethelookssuccessfully。DUKEFREDERICKHownow,daughterandcousin!areyoucrepthithertoseethewrestling?ROSALINDAy,myliege,sopleaseyougiveusleave。DUKEFREDERICKYouwilltakelittledelightinit,I
cantellyou;
thereissuchoddsintheman。Inpityofthechallenger’syouthIwouldfaindissuadehim,buthewillnotbeentreated。Speaktohim,ladies;
seeifyoucanmovehim。CELIACallhimhither,goodMonsieurLeBeau。DUKEFREDERICKDoso:I’llnotbeby。LEBEAUMonsieurthechallenger,theprincessescallforyou。ORLANDOIattendthemwithallrespectandduty。ROSALINDYoungman,haveyouchallengedCharlesthewrestler?ORLANDONo,fairprincess;heisthegeneralchallenger:I
comebutin,asothersdo,totrywithhimthestrengthofmyyouth。CELIAYounggentleman,yourspiritsaretooboldforyouryears。Youhaveseencruelproofofthisman’sstrength:ifyousawyourselfwithyoureyesorknewyourselfwithyourjudgment,thefearofyouradventurewouldcounselyoutoamoreequalenterprise。Weprayyou,foryourownsake,toembraceyourownsafetyandgiveoverthisattempt。ROSALINDDo,youngsir;yourreputationshallnotthereforebemisprised:wewillmakeitoursuittothedukethatthewrestlingmightnotgoforward。ORLANDOIbeseechyou,punishmenotwithyourhardthoughts;whereinIconfessmemuchguilty,todenysofairandexcellentladiesanything。Butletyourfaireyesandgentlewishesgowithmetomytrial:whereinifIbefoiled,thereisbutoneshamedthatwasnevergracious;ifkilled,butonedeadthatwaswillingtobeso:Ishalldomyfriendsnowrong,forIhavenonetolamentme,theworldnoinjury,forinitIhavenothing;onlyintheworldIfillupaplace,whichmaybebettersuppliedwhenIhavemadeitempty。ROSALINDThelittlestrengththatIhave,Iwoulditwerewithyou。CELIAAndmine,toekeouthers。ROSALINDFareyouwell:prayheavenIbedeceivedinyou!CELIAYourheart’sdesiresbewithyou!CHARLESCome,whereisthisyounggallantthatissodesiroustoliewithhismotherearth?ORLANDOReady,sir;buthiswillhathinitamoremodestworking。DUKEFREDERICKYoushalltrybutonefall。CHARLESNo,Iwarrantyourgrace,youshallnotentreathimtoasecond,thathavesomightilypersuadedhimfromafirst。ORLANDOAnyoumeantomockmeafter,youshouldnothavemockedmebefore:butcomeyourways。ROSALINDNowHerculesbethyspeed,youngman!CELIAIwouldIwereinvisible,tocatchthestrongfellowbytheleg。
TheywrestleROSALINDOexcellentyoungman!CELIAIfIhadathunderboltinmineeye,I
cantellwhoshoulddown。
Shout。CHARLESisthrownDUKEFREDERICKNomore,nomore。ORLANDOYes,Ibeseechyourgrace:Iamnotyetwellbreathed。DUKEFREDERICKHowdostthou,Charles?LEBEAUHecannotspeak,mylord。DUKEFREDERICKBearhimaway。Whatisthyname,youngman?ORLANDOOrlando,myliege;theyoungestsonofSirRowlanddeBoys。DUKEFREDERICKIwouldthouhadstbeensontosomemanelse:
Theworldesteem’dthyfatherhonourable,ButIdidfindhimstillmineenemy:
Thoushouldsthavebetterpleasedmewiththisdeed,Hadstthoudescendedfromanotherhouse。
Butfaretheewell;thouartagallantyouth:
Iwouldthouhadsttoldmeofanotherfather。
ExeuntDUKEFREDERICK,train,andLEBEAUCELIAWereImyfather,coz,wouldIdothis?ORLANDOIammoreproudtobeSirRowland’sson,Hisyoungestson;andwouldnotchangethatcalling,TobeadoptedheirtoFrederick。ROSALINDMyfatherlovedSirRowlandashissoul,Andalltheworldwasofmyfather’smind:
HadIbeforeknownthisyoungmanhisson,Ishouldhavegivenhimtearsuntoentreaties,Ereheshouldthushaveventured。CELIAGentlecousin,Letusgothankhimandencouragehim:
Myfather’sroughandenviousdispositionSticksmeatheart。Sir,youhavewelldeserved:
IfyoudokeepyourpromisesinloveButjustly,asyouhaveexceededallpromise,Yourmistressshallbehappy。ROSALINDGentleman,GivinghimachainfromherneckWearthisforme,oneoutofsuitswithfortune,Thatcouldgivemore,butthatherhandlacksmeans。
Shallwego,coz?CELIAAy。Fareyouwell,fairgentleman。ORLANDOCanInotsay,Ithankyou?MybetterpartsAreallthrowndown,andthatwhichherestandsupIsbutaquintain,amerelifelessblock。ROSALINDHecallsusback:mypridefellwithmyfortunes;
I’llaskhimwhathewould。Didyoucall,sir?
Sir,youhavewrestledwellandoverthrownMorethanyourenemies。CELIAWillyougo,coz?ROSALINDHavewithyou。Fareyouwell。
ExeuntROSALINDandCELIAORLANDOWhatpassionhangstheseweightsuponmytongue?
Icannotspeaktoher,yetsheurgedconference。
OpoorOrlando,thouartoverthrown!
OrCharlesorsomethingweakermastersthee。
Re-enterLEBEAULEBEAUGoodsir,IdoinfriendshipcounselyouToleavethisplace。AlbeityouhavedeservedHighcommendation,trueapplauseandlove,Yetsuchisnowtheduke’sconditionThathemisconstruesallthatyouhavedone。
Thedukeishumorous;whatheisindeed,MoresuitsyoutoconceivethanItospeakof。ORLANDOIthankyou,sir:and,prayyou,tellmethis:
WhichofthetwowasdaughterofthedukeThatherewasatthewrestling?LEBEAUNeitherhisdaughter,ifwejudgebymanners;
ButyetindeedthelesserishisdaughterTheotherisdaughtertothebanish’dduke,Andheredetain’dbyherusurpinguncle,Tokeephisdaughtercompany;whoselovesAredearerthanthenaturalbondofsisters。
ButIcantellyouthatoflatethisdukeHathta’endispleasure’gainsthisgentleniece,GroundeduponnootherargumentButthatthepeoplepraiseherforhervirtuesAndpityherforhergoodfather’ssake;
And,onmylife,hismalice’gainsttheladyWillsuddenlybreakforth。Sir,fareyouwell:
Hereafter,inabetterworldthanthis,Ishalldesiremoreloveandknowledgeofyou。ORLANDOIrestmuchboundentoyou:fareyouwell。
ExitLEBEAU
ThusmustIfromthesmokeintothesmother;
Fromtyrantdukeuntoatyrantbrother:
ButheavenlyRosalind!
ExitSCENEIII。Aroominthepalace。EnterCELIAandROSALINDCELIAWhy,cousin!why,Rosalind!Cupidhavemercy!notaword?ROSALINDNotonetothrowatadog。CELIANo,thywordsaretooprecioustobecastawayuponcurs;throwsomeofthematme;come,lamemewithreasons。ROSALINDThenthereweretwocousinslaidup;whentheoneshouldbelamedwithreasonsandtheothermadwithoutany。CELIAButisallthisforyourfather?ROSALINDNo,someofitisformychild’sfather。
O,howfullofbriersisthisworking-dayworld!CELIATheyarebutburs,cousin,thrownupontheeinholidayfoolery:ifwewalknotinthetroddenpathsourverypetticoatswillcatchthem。ROSALINDIcouldshakethemoffmycoat:thesebursareinmyheart。CELIAHemthemaway。ROSALINDIwouldtry,ifIcouldcry’hem’andhavehim。CELIACome,come,wrestlewiththyaffections。ROSALINDO,theytakethepartofabetterwrestlerthanmyself!CELIAO,agoodwishuponyou!youwilltryintime,indespiteofafall。But,turningthesejestsoutofservice,letustalkingoodearnest:isitpossible,onsuchasudden,youshouldfallintosostrongalikingwitholdSirRowland’syoungestson?ROSALINDThedukemyfatherlovedhisfatherdearly。CELIADothitthereforeensuethatyoushouldlovehissondearly?Bythiskindofchase,Ishouldhatehim,formyfatherhatedhisfatherdearly;yetIhatenotOrlando。ROSALINDNo,faith,hatehimnot,formysake。CELIAWhyshouldInot?dothhenotdeservewell?ROSALINDLetmelovehimforthat,anddoyoulovehimbecauseIdo。Look,herecomestheduke。CELIAWithhiseyesfullofanger。
EnterDUKEFREDERICK,withLordsDUKEFREDERICKMistress,dispatchyouwithyoursafesthasteAndgetyoufromourcourt。ROSALINDMe,uncle?DUKEFREDERICKYou,cousinWithinthesetendaysifthatthoube’stfoundSonearourpubliccourtastwentymiles,Thoudiestforit。ROSALINDIdobeseechyourgrace,Letmetheknowledgeofmyfaultbearwithme:
IfwithmyselfIholdintelligenceOrhaveacquaintancewithmineowndesires,IfthatIdonotdreamorbenotfrantic,——
AsIdotrustIamnot——then,dearuncle,NeversomuchasinathoughtunbornDidIoffendyourhighness。DUKEFREDERICKThusdoalltraitors:
Iftheirpurgationdidconsistinwords,Theyareasinnocentasgraceitself:
LetitsufficetheethatItrusttheenot。ROSALINDYetyourmistrustcannotmakemeatraitor:
Tellmewhereonthelikelihooddepends。DUKEFREDERICKThouartthyfather’sdaughter;there’senough。ROSALINDSowasIwhenyourhighnesstookhisdukedom;
SowasIwhenyourhighnessbanish’dhim:
Treasonisnotinherited,mylord;
Or,ifwedidderiveitfromourfriends,What’sthattome?myfatherwasnotraitor:
Then,goodmyliege,mistakemenotsomuchTothinkmypovertyistreacherous。CELIADearsovereign,hearmespeak。DUKEFREDERICKAy,Celia;westay’dherforyoursake,Elsehadshewithherfatherrangedalong。CELIAIdidnotthenentreattohaveherstay;
Itwasyourpleasureandyourownremorse:
Iwastooyoungthattimetovalueher;
ButnowIknowher:ifshebeatraitor,WhysoamI;westillhaveslepttogether,Roseataninstant,learn’d,play’d,eattogether,Andwheresoeverwewent,likeJuno’sswans,Stillwewentcoupledandinseparable。DUKEFREDERICKSheistoosubtleforthee;andhersmoothness,HerverysilenceandherpatienceSpeaktothepeople,andtheypityher。
Thouartafool:sherobstheeofthyname;
AndthouwiltshowmorebrightandseemmorevirtuousWhensheisgone。Thenopennotthylips:
FirmandirrevocableismydoomWhichIhavepass’duponher;sheisbanish’d。CELIAPronouncethatsentencethenonme,myliege:
Icannotliveoutofhercompany。DUKEFREDERICKYouareafool。You,niece,provideyourself:
Ifyououtstaythetime,uponminehonour,Andinthegreatnessofmyword,youdie。
ExeuntDUKEFREDERICKandLordsCELIAOmypoorRosalind,whitherwiltthougo?
Wiltthouchangefathers?Iwillgivetheemine。
Ichargethee,benotthoumoregrievedthanI
am。ROSALINDIhavemorecause。CELIAThouhastnot,cousin;
Pritheebecheerful:know’stthounot,thedukeHathbanish’dme,hisdaughter?ROSALINDThathehathnot。CELIANo,hathnot?RosalindlacksthentheloveWhichteacheththeethatthouandIamone:
Shallwebesunder’d?shallwepart,sweetgirl?
No:letmyfatherseekanotherheir。
Thereforedevisewithmehowwemayfly,Whithertogoandwhattobearwithus;
Anddonotseektotakeyourchangeuponyou,Tobearyourgriefsyourselfandleavemeout;
For,bythisheaven,nowatoursorrowspale,Saywhatthoucanst,I’llgoalongwiththee。ROSALINDWhy,whithershallwego?CELIAToseekmyuncleintheforestofArden。ROSALINDAlas,whatdangerwillitbetous,Maidsasweare,totravelforthsofar!
Beautyprovokeththievessoonerthangold。CELIAI’llputmyselfinpoorandmeanattireAndwithakindofumbersmirchmyface;
Thelikedoyou:soshallwepassalongAndneverstirassailants。ROSALINDWereitnotbetter,BecausethatIammorethancommontall,ThatIdidsuitmeallpointslikeaman?
Agallantcurtle-axeuponmythigh,Aboar-spearinmyhand;and——inmyheartLietherewhathiddenwoman’sfeartherewill——
We’llhaveaswashingandamartialoutside,AsmanyothermannishcowardshaveThatdooutfaceitwiththeirsemblances。CELIAWhatshallIcalltheewhenthouartaman?ROSALINDI’llhavenoworseanamethanJove’sownpage;
AndthereforelookyoucallmeGanymede。
Butwhatwillyoubecall’d?CELIASomethingthathathareferencetomystateNolongerCelia,butAliena。ROSALINDBut,cousin,whatifweassay’dtostealTheclownishfooloutofyourfather’scourt?
Wouldhenotbeacomforttoourtravel?CELIAHe’llgoalongo’erthewideworldwithme;
Leavemealonetowoohim。Let’saway,Andgetourjewelsandourwealthtogether,DevisethefittesttimeandsafestwayTohideusfrompursuitthatwillbemadeAftermyflight。NowgoweincontentTolibertyandnottobanishment。
ExeuntACTIISCENEI。TheForestofArden。EnterDUKESENIOR,AMIENS,andtwoorthreeLords,likeforestersDUKESENIORNow,myco-matesandbrothersinexile,HathnotoldcustommadethislifemoresweetThanthatofpaintedpomp?ArenotthesewoodsMorefreefromperilthantheenviouscourt?
HerefeelwebutthepenaltyofAdam,Theseasons’difference,astheicyfangAndchurlishchidingofthewinter’swind,Which,whenitbitesandblowsuponmybody,EventillIshrinkwithcold,Ismileandsay’Thisisnoflattery:thesearecounsellorsThatfeelinglypersuademewhatIam。’
Sweetaretheusesofadversity,Which,likethetoad,uglyandvenomous,Wearsyetapreciousjewelinhishead;
AndthisourlifeexemptfrompublichauntFindstonguesintrees,booksintherunningbrooks,Sermonsinstonesandgoodineverything。
Iwouldnotchangeit。AMIENSHappyisyourgrace,ThatcantranslatethestubbornnessoffortuneIntosoquietandsosweetastyle。DUKESENIORCome,shallwegoandkillusvenison?
Andyetitirksmethepoordappledfools,Beingnativeburghersofthisdesertcity,ShouldintheirownconfineswithforkedheadsHavetheirroundhaunchesgored。FirstLordIndeed,mylord,ThemelancholyJaquesgrievesatthat,And,inthatkind,swearsyoudomoreusurpThandothyourbrotherthathathbanish’dyou。
To-daymyLordofAmiensandmyselfDidstealbehindhimashelayalongUnderanoakwhoseantiquerootpeepsoutUponthebrookthatbrawlsalongthiswood:
Tothewhichplaceapoorsequester’dstag,Thatfromthehunter’saimhadta’enahurt,Didcometolanguish,andindeed,mylord,ThewretchedanimalheavedforthsuchgroansThattheirdischargedidstretchhisleatherncoatAlmosttobursting,andthebigroundtearsCoursedoneanotherdownhisinnocentnoseInpiteouschase;andthusthehairyfoolMuchmarkedofthemelancholyJaques,Stoodontheextremestvergeoftheswiftbrook,Augmentingitwithtears。DUKESENIORButwhatsaidJaques?
Didhenotmoralizethisspectacle?FirstLordO,yes,intoathousandsimiles。
First,forhisweepingintotheneedlessstream;
’Poordeer,’quothhe,’thoumakestatestamentAsworldlingsdo,givingthysumofmoreTothatwhichhadtoomuch:’then,beingtherealone,Leftandabandon’dofhisvelvetfriends,’’Tisright:’quothhe;’thusmiserydothpartThefluxofcompany:’anonacarelessherd,Fullofthepasture,jumpsalongbyhimAndneverstaystogreethim;’Ay’quothJaques,’Sweepon,youfatandgreasycitizens;
’Tisjustthefashion:whereforedoyoulookUponthatpoorandbrokenbankruptthere?’
ThusmostinvectivelyhepierceththroughThebodyofthecountry,city,court,Yea,andofthisourlife,swearingthatweAremereusurpers,tyrantsandwhat’sworse,TofrighttheanimalsandtokillthemupIntheirassign’dandnativedwelling-place。DUKESENIORAnddidyouleavehiminthiscontemplation?SecondLordWedid,mylord,weepingandcommentingUponthesobbingdeer。DUKESENIORShowmetheplace:
Ilovetocopehiminthesesullenfits,Forthenhe’sfullofmatter。FirstLordI’llbringyoutohimstraight。
ExeuntSCENEII。Aroominthepalace。EnterDUKEFREDERICK,withLordsDUKEFREDERICKCanitbepossiblethatnomansawthem?
Itcannotbe:somevillainsofmycourtAreofconsentandsufferanceinthis。FirstLordIcannothearofanythatdidseeher。
Theladies,herattendantsofherchamber,Sawherabed,andinthemorningearlyTheyfoundthebeduntreasuredoftheirmistress。SecondLordMylord,theroynishclown,atwhomsooftYourgracewaswonttolaugh,isalsomissing。
Hisperia,theprincess’gentlewoman,Confessesthatshesecretlyo’erheardYourdaughterandhercousinmuchcommendThepartsandgracesofthewrestlerThatdidbutlatelyfoilthesinewyCharles;
Andshebelieves,wherevertheyaregone,Thatyouthissurelyintheircompany。DUKEFREDERICKSendtohisbrother;fetchthatgallanthither;
Ifhebeabsent,bringhisbrothertome;
I’llmakehimfindhim:dothissuddenly,AndletnotsearchandinquisitionquailTobringagainthesefoolishrunaways。
ExeuntSCENEIII。BeforeOLIVER’Shouse。EnterORLANDOandADAM,meetingORLANDOWho’sthere?ADAMWhat,myyoungmaster?O,mygentlemaster!
Omysweetmaster!OyoumemoryOfoldSirRowland!why,whatmakeyouhere?
Whyareyouvirtuous?whydopeopleloveyou?
Andwhereforeareyougentle,strongandvaliant?
WhywouldyoubesofondtoovercomeThebonnypriserofthehumorousduke?
Yourpraiseiscometooswiftlyhomebeforeyou。
Knowyounot,master,tosomekindofmenTheirgracesservethembutasenemies?
Nomoredoyours:yourvirtues,gentlemaster,Aresanctifiedandholytraitorstoyou。
O,whataworldisthis,whenwhatiscomelyEnvenomshimthatbearsit!ORLANDOWhy,what’sthematter?ADAMOunhappyyouth!
Comenotwithinthesedoors;withinthisroofTheenemyofallyourgraceslives:
Yourbrother——no,nobrother;yettheson——
Yetnottheson,IwillnotcallhimsonOfhimIwasabouttocallhisfather——
Hathheardyourpraises,andthisnighthemeansToburnthelodgingwhereyouusetolieAndyouwithinit:ifhefailofthat,Hewillhaveothermeanstocutyouoff。
Ioverheardhimandhispractises。
Thisisnoplace;thishouseisbutabutchery:
Abhorit,fearit,donotenterit。ORLANDOWhy,whither,Adam,wouldstthouhavemego?ADAMNomatterwhither,soyoucomenothere。ORLANDOWhat,wouldstthouhavemegoandbegmyfood?
OrwithabaseandboisterousswordenforceAthievishlivingonthecommonroad?
ThisImustdo,orknownotwhattodo:
YetthisIwillnotdo,dohowIcan;
IratherwillsubjectmetothemaliceOfadivertedbloodandbloodybrother。ADAMButdonotso。Ihavefivehundredcrowns,ThethriftyhireIsavedunderyourfather,WhichIdidstoretobemyfoster-nurseWhenserviceshouldinmyoldlimbslielameAndunregardedageincornersthrown:
Takethat,andHethatdoththeravensfeed,Yea,providentlycatersforthesparrow,Becomforttomyage!Hereisthegold;
AndallthisIgiveyou。Letmebeyourservant:
ThoughIlookold,yetIamstrongandlusty;
ForinmyyouthIneverdidapplyHotandrebelliousliquorsinmyblood,NordidnotwithunbashfulforeheadwooThemeansofweaknessanddebility;
Thereforemyageisasalustywinter,Frosty,butkindly:letmegowithyou;
I’lldotheserviceofayoungermanInallyourbusinessandnecessities。ORLANDOOgoodoldman,howwellintheeappearsTheconstantserviceoftheantiqueworld,Whenservicesweatforduty,notformeed!
Thouartnotforthefashionofthesetimes,Wherenonewillsweatbutforpromotion,Andhavingthat,dochoketheirserviceupEvenwiththehaving:itisnotsowiththee。
But,pooroldman,thouprunestarottentree,ThatcannotsomuchasablossomyieldInlieuofallthypainsandhusbandryButcomethyways;wellgoalongtogether,Anderewehavethyyouthfulwagesspent,We’lllightuponsomesettledlowcontent。ADAMMaster,goon,andIwillfollowthee,Tothelastgasp,withtruthandloyalty。
FromseventeenyearstillnowalmostfourscoreHerelivedI,butnowliveherenomore。
Atseventeenyearsmanytheirfortunesseek;
Butatfourscoreitistoolateaweek:
YetfortunecannotrecompensemebetterThantodiewellandnotmymaster’sdebtor。
ExeuntSCENEIV。TheForestofArden。EnterROSALINDforGanymede,CELIAforAliena,andTOUCHSTONEROSALINDOJupiter,howwearyaremyspirits!TOUCHSTONEIcarenotformyspirits,ifmylegswerenotweary。ROSALINDIcouldfindinmyhearttodisgracemyman’sapparelandtocrylikeawoman;butImustcomforttheweakervessel,asdoubletandhoseoughttoshowitselfcourageoustopetticoat:thereforecourage,goodAliena!CELIAIprayyou,bearwithme;Icannotgonofurther。TOUCHSTONEFormypart,Ihadratherbearwithyouthanbearyou;yetIshouldbearnocrossifIdidbearyou,forIthinkyouhavenomoneyinyourpurse。ROSALINDWell,thisistheforestofArden。TOUCHSTONEAy,nowamIinArden;themorefoolI;
whenIwasathome,Iwasinabetterplace:buttravellersmustbecontent。ROSALINDAy,beso,goodTouchstone。
EnterCORINandSILVIUS
Lookyou,whocomeshere;ayoungmanandanoldinsolemntalk。CORINThatisthewaytomakeherscornyoustill。SILVIUSOCorin,thatthouknew’sthowIdoloveher!CORINIpartlyguess;forIhavelovederenow。SILVIUSNo,Corin,beingold,thoucanstnotguess,ThoughinthyyouththouwastastruealoverAseversigh’duponamidnightpillow:
Butifthylovewereeverliketomine——
AssureIthinkdidnevermanloveso——
HowmanyactionsmostridiculousHastthoubeendrawntobythyfantasy?CORINIntoathousandthatIhaveforgotten。SILVIUSO,thoudidstthenne’erlovesoheartily!
Ifthouremember’stnottheslightestfollyThateverlovedidmaketheeruninto,Thouhastnotloved:
OrifthouhastnotsatasIdonow,Wearyingthyhearerinthymistress’praise,Thouhastnotloved:
OrifthouhastnotbrokefromcompanyAbruptly,asmypassionnowmakesme,Thouhastnotloved。
OPhebe,Phebe,Phebe!
ExitROSALINDAlas,poorshepherd!searchingofthywound,Ihavebyhardadventurefoundmineown。TOUCHSTONEAndImine。Iremember,whenIwasinloveIbrokemysworduponastoneandbidhimtakethatforcominga-nighttoJaneSmile;andIrememberthekissingofherbatletandthecow’sdugsthatherprettychopthandshadmilked;andIrememberthewooingofapeascodinsteadofher,fromwhomItooktwocodsand,givingherthemagain,saidwithweepingtears’Weartheseformysake。’Wethataretrueloversrunintostrangecapers;butasallismortalinnature,soisallnatureinlovemortalinfolly。ROSALINDThouspeakestwiserthanthouartwareof。TOUCHSTONENay,Ishallne’erbewareofmineownwittillI
breakmyshinsagainstit。ROSALINDJove,Jove!thisshepherd’spassionIsmuchuponmyfashion。TOUCHSTONEAndmine;butitgrowssomethingstalewithme。CELIAIprayyou,oneofyouquestionyondmanIfheforgoldwillgiveusanyfood:
Ifaintalmosttodeath。TOUCHSTONEHolla,youclown!ROSALINDPeace,fool:he’snotthykinsman。CORINWhocalls?TOUCHSTONEYourbetters,sir。CORINElsearetheyverywretched。ROSALINDPeace,Isay。Goodeventoyou,friend。CORINAndtoyou,gentlesir,andtoyouall。ROSALINDIprithee,shepherd,ifthatloveorgoldCaninthisdesertplacebuyentertainment,Bringuswherewemayrestourselvesandfeed:
Here’sayoungmaidwithtravelmuchoppress’dAndfaintsforsuccor。CORINFairsir,IpityherAndwish,forhersakemorethanformineown,Myfortunesweremoreabletorelieveher;
ButIamshepherdtoanothermanAnddonotshearthefleecesthatIgraze:
MymasterisofchurlishdispositionAndlittlereckstofindthewaytoheavenBydoingdeedsofhospitality:
Besides,hiscote,hisflocksandboundsoffeedArenowonsale,andatoursheepcotenow,Byreasonofhisabsence,thereisnothingThatyouwillfeedon;butwhatis,comesee。
Andinmyvoicemostwelcomeshallyoube。ROSALINDWhatishethatshallbuyhisflockandpasture?CORINThatyoungswainthatyousawherebuterewhile,Thatlittlecaresforbuyinganything。ROSALINDIpraythee,ifitstandwithhonesty,Buythouthecottage,pastureandtheflock,Andthoushalthavetopayforitofus。CELIAAndwewillmendthywages。Ilikethisplace。
Andwillinglycouldwastemytimeinit。CORINAssuredlythethingistobesold:
Gowithme:ifyoulikeuponreportThesoil,theprofitandthiskindoflife,IwillyourveryfaithfulfeederbeAndbuyitwithyourgoldrightsuddenly。