……Evenafirst-ratehorsecouldnotdoit，whilemine——youcanseeforyourself——isnotahorsebutadisgrace。’AndPavelIvanitchwillfrownandshout：’Weknowyou！Youalwaysfindsomeexcuse！Especiallyyou，Grishka；Iknowyouofold！I’llbeboundyouhavestoppedathalfadozentaverns！’AndIshallsay：’Yourhonor！amIacriminaloraheathen？MyoldwomanisgivinguphersoultoGod，sheisdying，andamIgoingtorunfromtaverntotavern！Whatanidea，uponmyword！Plaguetakethem，thetaverns！’ThenPavelIvanitchwillorderyoutobetakenintothehospital，andIshallfallathisfeet……’PavelIvanitch！Yourhonor，wethankyoumosthumbly！Forgiveusfoolsandanathemas，don’tbehardonuspeasants！Wedeserveagoodkicking，whileyougraciouslyputyourselfoutandmessyourfeetinthesnow！’AndPavelIvanitchwillgivemealookasthoughhewouldliketohitme，andwillsay：’You’dmuchbetternotbeswillingvodka，youfool，buttakingpityonyouroldwomaninsteadoffallingatmyfeet。Youwantathrashing！’’Youarerightthere——athrashing，PavelIvanitch，strikemeGod！
　　Buthowcanwehelpbowingdownatyourfeetifyouareourbenefactor，andarealfathertous？Yourhonor！Igiveyoumyword，……hereasbeforeGod，……youmayspitinmyfaceifIdeceiveyou：assoonasmyMatryona，thissamehere，iswellagainandrestoredtohernaturalcondition，I’llmakeanythingforyourhonorthatyouwouldliketoorder！Acigarette-case，ifyoulike，ofthebestbirchwood，……ballsforcroquet，skittlesofthemostforeignpatternIcanturn……Iwillmakeanythingforyou！Iwon’ttakeafarthingfromyou。InMoscowtheywouldchargeyoufourroublesforsuchacigarette-case，butIwon’ttakeafarthing。’Thedoctorwilllaughandsay：’Oh，allright，allright……Isee！Butit’sapityyouareadrunkard……’Iknowhowtomanagethegentry，oldgirl。Thereisn’tagentlemanIcouldn’ttalkto。OnlyGodgrantwedon’tgetofftheroad。Oh，howitisblowing！One’seyesarefullofsnow。"
　　Andtheturnerwentonmutteringendlessly。Heprattledonmechanicallytogetalittlerelieffromhisdepressingfeelings。
　　Hehadplentyofwordsonhistongue，butthethoughtsandquestionsinhisbrainwereevenmorenumerous。Sorrowhadcomeupontheturnerunawares，unlooked-for，andunexpected，andnowhecouldnotgetoverit，couldnotrecoverhimself。Hehadlivedhithertoinunruffledcalm，asthoughindrunkenhalf-consciousness，knowingneithergriefnorjoy，andnowhewassuddenlyawareofadreadfulpaininhisheart。Thecarelessidleranddrunkardfoundhimselfquitesuddenlyinthepositionofabusyman，weigheddownbyanxietiesandhaste，andevenstrugglingwithnature。
　　Theturnerrememberedthathistroublehadbeguntheeveningbefore。Whenhehadcomehomeyesterdayevening，alittledrunkasusual，andfromlong-establishedhabithadbegunswearingandshakinghisfists，hisoldwomanhadlookedatherrowdyspouseasshehadneverlookedathimbefore。Usually，theexpressioninheragedeyeswasthatofamartyr，meeklikethatofadogfrequentlybeatenandbadlyfed；thistimeshehadlookedathimsternlyandimmovably，assaintsintheholypicturesordyingpeoplelook。Fromthatstrange，evillookinhereyesthetroublehadbegun。Theturner，stupefiedwithamazement，borrowedahorsefromaneighbor，andnowwastakinghisoldwomantothehospitalinthehopethat，bymeansofpowdersandointments，PavelIvanitchwouldbringbackhisoldwoman’shabitualexpression。
　　"Isay，Matryona，……"theturnermuttered，"ifPavelIvanitchasksyouwhetherIbeatyou，say，’Never！’andIneverwillbeatyouagain。Iswearit。AnddidIeverbeatyououtofspite？I
　　justbeatyouwithoutthinking。Iamsorryforyou。Somemenwouldn’ttrouble，buthereIamtakingyou……Iamdoingmybest。Andthewayitsnows，thewayitsnows！ThyWillbedone，O
　　Lord！Godgrantwedon’tgetofftheroad……Doesyoursideache，Matryona，thatyoudon’tspeak？Iaskyou，doesyoursideache？"
　　Itstruckhimasstrangethatthesnowonhisoldwoman’sfacewasnotmelting；itwasqueerthatthefaceitselflookedsomehowdrawn，andhadturnedapalegray，dingywaxenhueandhadgrowngraveandsolemn。
　　"Youareafool！"mutteredtheturner……"Itellyouonmyconscience，beforeGod，……andyougoand……Well，youareafool！IhaveagoodmindnottotakeyoutoPavelIvanitch！"
　　Theturnerletthereinsgoandbeganthinking。Hecouldnotbringhimselftolookroundathisoldwoman：hewasfrightened。
　　Hewasafraid，too，ofaskingheraquestionandnotgettingananswer。Atlast，tomakeanendofuncertainty，withoutlookingroundhefelthisoldwoman’scoldhand。Theliftedhandfelllikealog。
　　"Sheisdead，then！Whatabusiness！"
　　Andtheturnercried。Hewasnotsomuchsorryasannoyed。Hethoughthowquicklyeverythingpassesinthisworld！Histroublehadhardlybegunwhenthefinalcatastrophehadhappened。Hehadnothadtimetolivewithhisoldwoman，toshowherhewassorryforherbeforeshedied。Hehadlivedwithherforfortyyears，butthosefortyyearshadpassedbyasitwereinafog。
　　Whatwithdrunkenness，quarreling，andpoverty，therehadbeennofeelingoflife。And，asthoughtospitehim，hisoldwomandiedattheverytimewhenhefelthewassorryforher，thathecouldnotlivewithouther，andthathehadbehaveddreadfullybadlytoher。
　　"Why，sheusedtogotheroundofthevillage，"heremembered。"I
　　sentheroutmyselftobegforbread。Whatabusiness！Sheoughttohavelivedanothertenyears，thesillything；asitisI’llbeboundshethinksIreallywasthatsortofman……HolyMother！butwherethedevilamIdriving？There’snoneedforadoctornow，butaburial。Turnback！"
　　Grigoryturnedbackandlashedthehorsewithallhismight。Theroadgrewworseandworseeveryhour。Nowhecouldnotseetheyokeatall。Nowandthenthesledgeranintoayoungfirtree，adarkobjectscratchedtheturner’shandsandflashedbeforehiseyes，andthefieldofvisionwaswhiteandwhirlingagain。
　　"Toliveoveragain，"thoughttheturner。
　　HerememberedthatfortyyearsagoMatryonahadbeenyoung，handsome，merry，thatshehadcomeofawell-to-dofamily。Theyhadmarriedhertohimbecausetheyhadbeenattractedbyhishandicraft。Alltheessentialsforahappylifehadbeenthere，butthetroublewasthat，justashehadgotdrunkaftertheweddingandlaysprawlingonthestove，sohehadgoneonwithoutwakinguptillnow。Hisweddingheremembered，butofwhathappenedafterthewedding——forthelifeofhimhecouldremembernothing，exceptperhapsthathehaddrunk，lainonthestove，andquarreled。Fortyyearshadbeenwastedlikethat。
　　Thewhitecloudsofsnowwerebeginninglittlebylittletoturngray。Itwasgettingdusk。
　　"WhereamIgoing？"theturnersuddenlybethoughthimwithastart。"Ioughttobethinkingoftheburial，andIamonthewaytothehospital……ItasisthoughIhadgonecrazy。"
　　Grigoryturnedroundagain，andagainlashedhishorse。Thelittlenagstraineditsutmostand，withasnort，fellintoalittletrot。Theturnerlasheditonthebacktimeaftertime……Aknockingwasaudiblebehindhim，andthoughhedidnotlookround，heknewitwasthedeadwoman’sheadknockingagainstthesledge。Andthesnowkeptturningdarkeranddarker，thewindgrewcolderandmorecutting……
　　"Toliveoveragain！"thoughttheturner。"Ishouldgetanewlathe，takeorders，……givethemoneytomyoldwoman……"
　　Andthenhedroppedthereins。Helookedforthem，triedtopickthemup，butcouldnot——hishandswouldnotwork……
　　"Itdoesnotmatter，"hethought，"thehorsewillgoofitself，itknowstheway。Imighthavealittlesleepnow……Beforethefuneralortherequiemitwouldbeaswelltogetalittlerest……"
　　Theturnerclosedhiseyesanddozed。Alittlelaterheheardthehorsestop；heopenedhiseyesandsawbeforehimsomethingdarklikeahutorahaystack……
　　Hewouldhavegotoutofthesledgeandfoundoutwhatitwas，buthefeltovercomebysuchinertiathatitseemedbettertofreezethanmove，andhesankintoapeacefulsleep。
　　Hewokeupinabigroomwithpaintedwalls。Brightsunlightwasstreaminginatthewindows。Theturnersawpeoplefacinghim，andhisfirstfeelingwasadesiretoshowhimselfarespectablemanwhoknewhowthingsshouldbedone。
　　"Arequiem，brothers，formyoldwoman，"hesaid。"Thepriestshouldbetold……"
　　"Oh，allright，allright；liedown，"avoicecuthimshort。
　　"PavelIvanitch！"theturnercriedinsurprise，seeingthedoctorbeforehim。"Yourhonor，benefactor！"
　　Hewantedtoleapupandfallonhiskneesbeforethedoctor，butfeltthathisarmsandlegswouldnotobeyhim。
　　"Yourhonor，wherearemylegs，wherearemyarms！"
　　"Saygood-bytoyourarmsandlegs……They’vebeenfrozenoff。Come，come！……Whatareyoucryingfor？You’velivedyourlife，andthankGodforit！Isupposeyouhavehadsixtyyearsofit——that’senoughforyou！……"
　　"Iamgrieving……Graciouslyforgiveme！IfIcouldhaveanotherfiveorsixyears！……"
　　"Whatfor？"
　　"Thehorseisn’tmine，Imustgiveitback……Imustburymyoldwoman……Howquicklyitisallendedinthisworld！Yourhonor，PavelIvanitch！Acigarette-caseofbirchwoodofthebest！
　　I’llturnyoucroquetballs……"
　　Thedoctorwentoutofthewardwithawaveofhishand。Itwasalloverwiththeturner。
　　ONOFFICIALDUTY
　　THEdeputyexaminingmagistrateandthedistrictdoctorweregoingtoaninquestinthevillageofSyrnya。Ontheroadtheywereovertakenbyasnowstorm；theyspentalongtimegoingroundandround，andarrived，notatmidday，astheyhadintended，butintheeveningwhenitwasdark。TheyputupforthenightattheZemstvohut。Itsohappenedthatitwasinthishutthatthedeadbodywaslying——thecorpseoftheZemstvoinsuranceagent，Lesnitsky，whohadarrivedinSyrnyathreedaysbeforeand，orderingthesamovarinthehut，hadshothimself，tothegreatsurpriseofeveryone；andthefactthathehadendedhislifesostrangely，afterunpackinghiseatablesandlayingthemoutonthetable，andwiththesamovarbeforehim，ledmanypeopletosuspectthatitwasacaseofmurder；aninquestwasnecessary。
　　Intheouterroomthedoctorandtheexaminingmagistrateshookthesnowoffthemselvesandknockeditofftheirboots。Andmeanwhiletheoldvillageconstable，IlyaLoshadin，stoodby，holdingalittletinlamp。Therewasastrongsmellofparaffin。
　　"Whoareyou？"askedthedoctor。
　　"Conshtable，……"answeredtheconstable。
　　Heusedtospellit"conshtable"whenhesignedthereceiptsatthepostoffice。
　　"Andwherearethewitnesses？"
　　"Theymusthavegonetotea，yourhonor。"
　　Ontherightwastheparlor，thetravelers’orgentry’sroom；ontheleftthekitchen，withabigstoveandsleepingshelvesundertherafters。Thedoctorandtheexaminingmagistrate，followedbytheconstable，holdingthelamphighabovehishead，wentintotheparlor。Hereastill，longbodycoveredwithwhitelinenwaslyingonthefloorclosetothetable-legs。Inthedimlightofthelamptheycouldclearlysee，besidesthewhitecovering，newrubbergoloshes，andeverythingaboutitwasuncannyandsinister：thedarkwalls，andthesilence，andthegoloshes，andthestillnessofthedeadbody。Onthetablestoodasamovar，coldlongago；androunditparcels，probablytheeatables。
　　"ToshootoneselfintheZemstvohut，howtactless！"saidthedoctor。"Ifonedoeswanttoputabulletthroughone’sbrains，oneoughttodoitathomeinsomeouthouse。"
　　Hesankontoabench，justashewas，inhiscap，hisfurcoat，andhisfeltoverboots；hisfellow-traveler，theexaminingmagistrate，satdownopposite。
　　"Thesehysterical，neurasthenicpeoplearegreategoists，"thedoctorwentonhotly。"Ifaneurasthenicsleepsinthesameroomwithyou，herustleshisnewspaper；whenhedineswithyou，hegetsupascenewithhiswifewithouttroublingaboutyourpresence；andwhenhefeelsinclinedtoshoothimself，heshootshimselfinavillageinaZemstvohut，soastogivethemaximumoftroubletoeverybody。Thesegentlemenineverycircumstanceoflifethinkofnoonebutthemselves！That’swhytheelderlysodislikeour’nervousage。’"
　　"Theelderlydislikesomanythings，"saidtheexaminingmagistrate，yawning。"Youshouldpointouttotheeldergenerationwhatthedifferenceisbetweenthesuicidesofthepastandthesuicidesofto-day。Intheolddaystheso-calledgentlemanshothimselfbecausehehadmadeawaywithGovernmentmoney，butnowadaysitisbecauseheissickoflife，depressed……Whichisbetter？"
　　"Sickoflife，depressed；butyoumustadmitthathemighthaveshothimselfsomewhereelse。"
　　"Suchtrouble！"saidtheconstable，"suchtrouble！It’sarealaffliction。Thepeopleareverymuchupset，yourhonor；theyhaven’tsleptthesethreenights。Thechildrenarecrying。Thecowsoughttobemilked，butthewomenwon’tgotothestall——
　　theyareafraid……forfearthegentlemanshouldappeartotheminthedarkness。Ofcoursetheyaresillywomen，butsomeofthemenarefrightenedtoo。Assoonasitisdarktheywon’tgobythehutonebyone，butonlyinaflocktogether。Andthewitnessestoo……"
　　Dr。Startchenko，amiddle-agedmaninspectacleswithadarkbeard，andtheexaminingmagistrateLyzhin，afairman，stillyoung，whohadonlytakenhisdegreetwoyearsbeforeandlookedmorelikeastudentthananofficial，satinsilence，musing。
　　Theywerevexedthattheywerelate。Nowtheyhadtowaittillmorning，andtostayhereforthenight，thoughitwasnotyetsixo’clock；andtheyhadbeforethemalongevening，adarknight，boredom，uncomfortablebeds，beetles，andcoldinthemorning；andlisteningtotheblizzardthathowledinthechimneyandintheloft，theyboththoughthowunlikeallthiswasthelifewhichtheywouldhavechosenforthemselvesandofwhichtheyhadoncedreamed，andhowfarawaytheybothwerefromtheircontemporaries，whowereatthatmomentwalkingaboutthelightedstreetsintownwithoutnoticingtheweather，orweregettingreadyforthetheatre，orsittingintheirstudiesoverabook。Oh，howmuchtheywouldhavegivennowonlytostrollalongtheNevskyProspect，oralongPetrovkainMoscow，tolistentodecentsinging，tositforanhourorsoinarestaurant！
　　"Oo-oo-oo-oo！"sangthestormintheloft，andsomethingoutsideslammedviciously，probablythesignboardonthehut。
　　"Oo-oo-oo-oo！"
　　"Youcandoasyouplease，butIhavenodesiretostayhere，"
　　saidStartchenko，gettingup。"It’snotsixyet，it’stooearlytogotobed；Iamoff。VonTaunitzlivesnotfarfromhere，onlyacoupleofmilesfromSyrnya。Ishallgotoseehimandspendtheeveningthere。Constable，runandtellmycoachmannottotakethehorsesout。Andwhatareyougoingtodo？"heaskedLyzhin。
　　"Idon’tknow；IexpectIshallgotosleep。"
　　Thedoctorwrappedhimselfinhisfurcoatandwentout。Lyzhincouldhearhimtalkingtothecoachmanandthebellsbeginningtoquiveronthefrozenhorses。Hedroveoff。
　　"Itisnotniceforyou，sir，tospendthenightinhere，"saidtheconstable；"comeintotheotherroom。It’sdirty，butforonenightitwon’tmatter。I’llgetasamovarfromapeasantandheatitdirectly。I’llheapupsomehayforyou，andthenyougotosleep，andGodblessyou，yourhonor。"
　　Alittlelatertheexaminingmagistratewassittinginthekitchendrinkingtea，whileLoshadin，theconstable，wasstandingatthedoortalking。Hewasanoldmanaboutsixty，shortandverythin，bentandwhite，withanaivesmileonhisfaceandwateryeyes，andhekeptsmackingwithhislipsasthoughheweresuckingasweetmeat。Hewaswearingashortsheepskincoatandhighfeltboots，andheldhisstickinhishandsallthetime。Theyouthoftheexaminingmagistratearousedhiscompassion，andthatwasprobablywhyheaddressedhimfamiliarly。
　　"Theeldergaveordersthathewastobeinformedwhenthepolicesuperintendentortheexaminingmagistratecame，"hesaid，"soI
　　supposeImustgonow……It’snearlythreemilestothe_volost_，andthestorm，thesnowdrifts，aresomethingterrible——maybeonewon’tgettherebeforemidnight。Ough！howthewindroars！"
　　"Idon’tneedtheelder，"saidLyzhin。"Thereisnothingforhimtodohere。"
　　Helookedattheoldmanwithcuriosity，andasked：
　　"Tellme，grandfather，howmanyyearshaveyoubeenconstable？"
　　"Howmany？Why，thirtyyears。FiveyearsaftertheFreedomI
　　begangoingasconstable，that’showIreckonit。AndfromthattimeIhavebeengoingeverydaysince。Otherpeoplehaveholidays，butIamalwaysgoing。Whenit’sEasterandthechurchbellsareringingandChristhasrisen，Istillgoaboutwithmybag——tothetreasury，tothepost，tothepolicesuperintendent’slodgings，totheruralcaptain，tothetaxinspector，tothemunicipaloffice，tothegentry，tothepeasants，toallorthodoxChristians。Icarryparcels，notices，taxpapers，letters，formsofdifferentsorts，circulars，andtobesure，kindgentleman，thereareallsortsofformsnowadays，soastonotedownthenumbers——yellow，white，andred——andeverygentlemanorpriestorwell-to-dopeasantmustwritedownadozentimesintheyearhowmuchhehassownandharvested，howmanyquartersorpoodshehasofrye，howmanyofoats，howmanyofhay，andwhattheweather’slike，youknow，andinsects，too，ofallsorts。Tobesureyoucanwritewhatyoulike，it’sonlyaregulation，butonemustgoandgiveoutthenoticesandthengoagainandcollectthem。Here，forinstance，there’snoneedtocutopenthegentleman；youknowyourselfit’sasillything，it’sonlydirtyingyourhands，andhereyouhavebeenputtotrouble，yourhonor；youhavecomebecauseit’stheregulation；
　　youcan’thelpit。ForthirtyyearsIhavebeengoingroundaccordingtoregulation。Inthesummeritisallright，itiswarmanddry；butinwinterandautumnit’suncomfortableAttimesIhavebeenalmostdrownedandalmostfrozen；allsortsofthingshavehappened——wickedpeoplesetonmeintheforestandtookawaymybag；Ihavebeenbeaten，andIhavebeenbeforeacourtoflaw。"
　　"Whatwereyouaccusedof？"
　　"Offraud。"
　　"Howdoyoumean？"
　　"Why，yousee，HrisanfGrigoryev，theclerk，soldthecontractorsomeboardsbelongingtosomeoneelse——cheatedhim，infact。I
　　wasmixedupinit。Theysentmetothetavernforvodka；well，theclerkdidnotsharewithme——didnotevenoffermeaglass；
　　butasthroughmypovertyIwas——inappearance，Imean——notamantobereliedupon，notamanofanyworth，wewerebothbroughttotrial；hewassenttoprison，but，praiseGod！Iwasacquittedonallpoints。Theyreadanotice，youknow，inthecourt。Andtheywereallinuniforms——inthecourt，Imean。I
　　cantellyou，yourhonor，mydutiesforanyonenotusedtothemareterrible，absolutelykilling；buttomeitisnothing。Infact，myfeetachewhenIamnotwalking。Andathomeitisworseforme。Athomeonehastoheatthestovefortheclerkinthe_volost_office，tofetchwaterforhim，tocleanhisboots。"
　　"Andwhatwagesdoyouget？"Lyzhinasked。
　　"Eighty-fourroublesayear。"
　　"I’llbetyougetotherlittlesumscomingin。Youdo，don’tyou？"
　　"Otherlittlesums？No，indeed！Gentlemennowadaysdon’toftengivetips。Gentlemennowadaysarestrict，theytakeoffenseatanything。Ifyoubringthemanoticetheyareoffended，ifyoutakeoffyourcapbeforethemtheyareoffended。’Youhavecometothewrongentrance，’theysay。’Youareadrunkard，’theysay。
　　’Yousmellofonion；youareablockhead；youarethesonofabitch。’Therearekind-heartedones，ofcourse；butwhatdoesonegetfromthem？Theyonlylaughandcalloneallsortsofnames。
　　Mr。Altuhin，forinstance，heisagood-naturedgentleman；andifyoulookathimheseemssoberandinhisrightmind，butsosoonasheseesmeheshoutsanddoesnotknowwhathemeanshimself。
　　Hegavemesuchaname’You，’saidhe，……"Theconstableutteredsomeword，butinsuchalowvoicethatitwasimpossibletomakeoutwhathesaid。
　　"What？"Lyzhinasked。"Sayitagain。"
　　"’Administration，’"theconstablerepeatedaloud。"Hehasbeencallingmethatforalongwhile，forthelastsixyears。’Hullo，Administration！’ButIdon’tmind；lethim，Godblesshim！
　　Sometimesaladywillsendoneaglassofvodkaandabitofpieandonedrinkstoherhealth。Butpeasantsgivemore；peasantsaremorekind-hearted，theyhavethefearofGodintheirhearts：
　　onewillgiveabitofbread，anotheradropofcabbagesoup，anotherwillstandoneaglass。Thevillageelderstreatonetoteainthetavern。Herethewitnesseshavegonetotheirtea。
　　’Loshadin，’theysaid，’youstayhereandkeepwatchforus，’andtheygavemeakopeckeach。Yousee，theyarefrightened，notbeingusedtoit，andyesterdaytheygavemefifteenkopecksandofferedmeaglass。"
　　"Andyou，aren’tyoufrightened？"
　　"Iam，sir；butofcourseitismyduty，thereisnogettingawayfromit。InthesummerIwastakingaconvicttothetown，andhesetuponmeandgavemesuchadrubbing！Andallaroundwerefields，forest——howcouldIgetawayfromhim？It’sjustthesamehere。Irememberthegentleman，Mr。Lesnitsky，whenhewassohigh，andIknewhisfatherandmother。IamfromthevillageofNedoshtchotova，andthey，theLesnitskyfamily，werenotmorethanthree-quartersofamilefromusandlessthanthat，theirgroundnexttoours，andMr。Lesnitskyhadasister，aGod-fearingandtender-heartedlady。LordkeepthesoulofThyservantYulya，eternalmemorytoher！Shewasnevermarried，andwhenshewasdyingshedividedallherproperty；
　　sheleftthreehundredacrestothemonastery，andsixhundredtothecommuneofpeasantsofNedoshtchotovatocommemoratehersoul；butherbrotherhidthewill，theydosayburntitinthestove，andtookallthislandforhimself。Hethought，tobesure，itwasforhisbenefit；but——nay，waitabit，youwon’tgetonintheworldthroughinjustice，brother。Thegentlemandidnotgotoconfessionfortwentyyearsafter。Hekeptawayfromthechurch，tobesure，anddiedimpenitent。Heburst。Hewasaveryfatman，soheburstlengthways。Theneverythingwastakenfromtheyoungmaster，fromSeryozha，topaythedebts——everythingtherewas。Well，hehadnotgoneveryfarinhisstudies，hecouldn’tdoanything，andthepresidentoftheRuralBoard，hisuncle——’I’lltakehim’——Seryozha，I
　　mean——thinkshe，’foranagent；lethimcollecttheinsurance，that’snotadifficultjob，’andthegentlemanwasyoungandproud，hewantedtobelivingonabiggerscaleandinbetterstyleandwithmorefreedom。Tobesureitwasacome-downforhimtobejoltingaboutthedistrictinawretchedcartandtalkingtothepeasants；hewouldwalkandkeeplookingontheground，lookingonthegroundandsayingnothing；ifyoucalledhisnamerightinhisear，’SergeySergeyitch！’hewouldlookroundlikethis，’Eh？’andlookdownonthegroundagain，andnowyouseehehaslaidhandsonhimself。There’snosenseinit，yourhonor，it’snotright，andthere’snomakingoutwhat’sthemeaningofit，mercifulLord！Sayyourfatherwasrichandyouarepoor；itismortifying，there’snodoubtaboutit，butthere，youmustmakeupyourmindtoit。Iusedtoliveingoodstyle，too；Ihadtwohorses，yourhonor，threecows，Iusedtokeeptwentyheadofsheep；butthetimehascome，andIamleftwithnothingbutawretchedbag，andeventhatisnotminebutGovernmentproperty。AndnowinourNedoshtchotova，ifthetruthistobetold，myhouseistheworstofthelot。Makeyhadfourfootmen，andnowMakeyisafootmanhimself。Petrakhadfourlaborers，andnowPetrakisalaborerhimself。"
　　"Howwasityoubecamepoor？"askedtheexaminingmagistrate。
　　"Mysonsdrinkterribly。Icouldnottellyouhowtheydrink，youwouldn’tbelieveit。"
　　Lyzhinlistenedandthoughthowhe，Lyzhin，wouldgobacksoonerorlatertoMoscow，whilethisoldmanwouldstayhereforever，andwouldalwaysbewalkingandwalking。Andhowmanytimesinhislifehewouldcomeacrosssuchbattered，unkemptoldmen，not"menofanyworth，"inwhosesoulsfifteenkopecks，glassesofvodka，andaprofoundbeliefthatyoucan’tgetoninthislifebydishonesty，wereequallyfirmlyrooted。
　　Thenhegrewtiredoflistening，andtoldtheoldmantobringhimsomehayforhisbed，Therewasanironbedsteadwithapillowandaquiltinthetraveler’sroom，anditcouldbefetchedin；butthedeadmanhadbeenlyingbyitfornearlythreedays（andperhapssittingonitjustbeforehisdeath），anditwouldbedisagreeabletosleepuponitnow……
　　"It’sonlyhalf-pastseven，"thoughtLyzhin，glancingathiswatch。"Howawfulitis！"
　　Hewasnotsleepy，buthavingnothingtodotopassawaythetime，helaydownandcoveredhimselfwitharug。Loshadinwentinandoutseveraltimes，clearingawaythetea-things；smackinghislipsandsighing，hekepttrampingroundthetable；atlasthetookhislittlelampandwentout，and，lookingathislong，gray-headed，bentfigurefrombehind，Lyzhinthought：
　　"Justlikeamagicianinanopera。"
　　Itwasdark。Themoonmusthavebeenbehindtheclouds，asthewindowsandthesnowonthewindow-framescouldbeseendistinctly。
　　"Oo-oo-oo！"sangthestorm，"Oo-oo-oo-oo！"
　　"Ho-ho-lysa-aints！"wailedawomanintheloft，oritsoundedlikeit。"Ho-ho-lysa-aints！"
　　"B-booh！"somethingoutsidebangedagainstthewall。"Trah！"
　　Theexaminingmagistratelistened：therewasnowomanupthere，itwasthewindhowling。Itwasrathercold，andheputhisfurcoatoverhisrug。Ashegotwarmhethoughthowremoteallthis——thestorm，andthehut，andtheoldman，andthedeadbodylyinginthenextroom——howremoteitallwasfromthelifehedesiredforhimself，andhowalienitallwastohim，howpetty，howuninteresting。IfthismanhadkilledhimselfinMoscoworsomewhereintheneighborhood，andhehadhadtoholdaninquestonhimthere，itwouldhavebeeninteresting，important，andperhapshemightevenhavebeenafraidtosleepinthenextroomtothecorpse。Here，nearlyathousandmilesfromMoscow，allthiswasseensomehowinadifferentlight；itwasnotlife，theywerenothumanbeings，butsomethingonlyexisting"accordingtotheregulation，"asLoshadinsaid；itwouldleavenotthefaintesttraceinthememory，andwouldbeforgottenassoonashe，Lyzhin，droveawayfromSyrnya。Thefatherland，therealRussia，wasMoscow，Petersburg；butherehewasintheprovinces，thecolonies。Whenonedreamedofplayingaleadingpart，ofbecomingapopularfigure，ofbeing，forinstance，examiningmagistrateinparticularlyimportantcasesorprosecutorinacircuitcourt，ofbeingasocietylion，onealwaysthoughtofMoscow。Tolive，onemustbeinMoscow；hereonecaredfornothing，onegreweasilyresignedtoone’sinsignificantposition，andonlyexpectedonethingoflife——
　　togetawayquickly，quickly。AndLyzhinmentallymovedabouttheMoscowstreets，wentintothefamiliarhouses，methiskindred，hiscomrades，andtherewasasweetpangathisheartatthethoughtthathewasonlytwenty-six，andthatifinfiveortenyearshecouldbreakawayfromhereandgettoMoscow，eventhenitwouldnotbetoolateandhewouldstillhaveawholelifebeforehim。Andashesankintounconsciousness，ashisthoughtsbegantobeconfused，heimaginedthelongcorridorofthecourtatMoscow，himselfdeliveringaspeech，hissisters，theorchestrawhichforsomereasonkeptdroning："Oo-oo-oo-oo！
　　Oo-oooo-oo！"
　　"Booh！Trah！"soundedagain。"Booh！"
　　Andhesuddenlyrecalledhowoneday，whenhewastalkingtothebookkeeperinthelittleofficeoftheRuralBoard，athin，palegentlemanwithblackhairanddarkeyeswalkedin；hehadadisagreeablelookinhiseyessuchasoneseesinpeoplewhohaveslepttoolongafterdinner，anditspoilthisdelicate，intelligentprofile；andthehighbootshewaswearingdidnotsuithim，butlookedclumsy。Thebookkeeperhadintroducedhim：
　　"Thisisourinsuranceagent。"
　　"SothatwasLesnitsky，……thissameman，"Lyzhinreflectednow。
　　HerecalledLesnitsky’ssoftvoice，imaginedhisgait，anditseemedtohimthatsomeonewaswalkingbesidehimnowwithasteplikeLesnitsky’s。
　　Allatoncehefeltfrightened，hisheadturnedcold。
　　"Who’sthere？"heaskedinalarm。
　　"Theconshtable！"
　　"Whatdoyouwanthere？"
　　"Ihavecometoask，yourhonor——yousaidthiseveningthatyoudidnotwanttheelder，butIamafraidhemaybeangry。Hetoldmetogotohim。Shouldn’tIgo？"
　　"That’senough，youbotherme，"saidLyzhinwithvexation，andhecoveredhimselfupagain。
　　"Hemaybeangry……I’llgo，yourhonor。Ihopeyouwillbecomfortable，"andLoshadinwentout。
　　Inthepassagetherewascoughingandsubduedvoices。Thewitnessesmusthavereturned。
　　"We’llletthosepoorbeggarsgetawayearlyto-morrow，……"
　　thoughttheexaminingmagistrate；"we’llbegintheinquestassoonasitisdaylight。"
　　Hebegansinkingintoforgetfulnesswhensuddenlytherewerestepsagain，nottimidthistimebutrapidandnoisy。Therewastheslamofadoor，voices，thescratchingofamatch……
　　"Areyouasleep？Areyouasleep？"Dr。Startchenkowasaskinghimhurriedlyandangrilyashestruckonematchafteranother；hewascoveredwithsnow，andbroughtachillairinwithhim。"Areyouasleep？Getup！LetusgotoVonTaunitz’s。Hehassenthisownhorsesforyou。Comealong。There，atanyrate，youwillhavesupper，andsleeplikeahumanbeing。YouseeIhavecomeforyoumyself。Thehorsesaresplendid，weshallgetthereintwentyminutes。"
　　"Andwhattimeisitnow？"
　　"Aquarterpastten。"
　　Lyzhin，sleepyanddiscontented，putonhisfeltoverboots，hisfurlinedcoat，hiscapandhood，andwentoutwiththedoctor。
　　Therewasnotaverysharpfrost，butaviolentandpiercingwindwasblowinganddrivingalongthestreetthecloudsofsnowwhichseemedtoberacingawayinterror：highdriftswereheapedupalreadyunderthefencesandatthedoorways。Thedoctorandtheexaminingmagistrategotintothesledge，andthewhitecoachmanbentoverthemtobuttonupthecover。Theywerebothhot。
　　"Ready！"
　　Theydrovethroughthevillage。"Cuttingafeatheryfurrow，"
　　thoughttheexaminingmagistrate，listlesslywatchingtheactionofthetracehorse’slegs。Therewerelightsinallthehuts，asthoughitweretheeveofagreatholiday：thepeasantshadnotgonetobedbecausetheywereafraidofthedeadbody。Thecoachmanpreservedasullensilence，probablyhehadfeltdrearywhilehewaswaitingbytheZemstvohut，andnowhe，too，wasthinkingofthedeadman。
　　"AttheVonTaunitz’s，"saidStartchenko，"theyallsetuponmewhentheyheardthatyouwerelefttospendthenightinthehut，andaskedmewhyIdidnotbringyouwithme。"
　　Astheydroveoutofthevillage，attheturningthecoachmansuddenlyshoutedatthetopofhisvoice："Outoftheway！"
　　Theycaughtaglimpseofaman：hewasstandinguptohiskneesinthesnow，movingofftheroadandstaringatthehorses。Theexaminingmagistratesawastickwithacrook，andabeardandabag，andhefanciedthatitwasLoshadin，andevenfanciedthathewassmiling。Heflashedbyanddisappeared。
　　Theroadranatfirstalongtheedgeoftheforest，thenalongabroadforestclearing；theycaughtglimpsesofoldpinesandayoungbirchcopse，andtall，gnarledyoungoaktreesstandingsinglyintheclearingswherethewoodhadlatelybeencut；butsoonitwasallmergedinthecloudsofsnow。Thecoachmansaidhecouldseetheforest；theexaminingmagistratecouldseenothingbutthetracehorse。Thewindblewontheirbacks。
　　Allatoncethehorsesstopped。
　　"Well，whatisitnow？"askedStartchenkocrossly。
　　Thecoachmangotdownfromtheboxwithoutawordandbeganrunningroundthesledge，treadingonhisheels；hemadelargerandlargercircles，gettingfurtherandfurtherawayfromthesledge，anditlookedasthoughheweredancing；atlasthecamebackandbegantoturnofftotheright。
　　"You’vegotofftheroad，eh？"askedStartchenko。
　　"It’sallri-ight……"
　　Thentherewasalittlevillageandnotasinglelightinit。
　　Againtheforestandthefields。Againtheylosttheroad，andagainthecoachmangotdownfromtheboxanddancedroundthesledge。Thesledgeflewalongadarkavenue，flewswiftlyon。
　　Andtheheatedtracehorse’shoofsknockedagainstthesledge。
　　Heretherewasafearfulroaringsoundfromthetrees，andnothingcouldbeseen，asthoughtheywereflyingonintospace；
　　andallatoncetheglaringlightattheentranceandthewindowsflashedupontheireyes，andtheyheardthegood-natured，drawn-outbarkingofdogs。Theyhadarrived。
　　Whiletheyweretakingofftheirfurcoatsandtheirfeltbootsbelow，"UnPetitVerredeClicquot"wasbeingplayeduponthepianooverhead，andtheycouldhearthechildrenbeatingtimewiththeirfeet。Immediatelyongoingintheywereawareofthesnugwarmthandspecialsmelloftheoldapartmentsofamansionwhere，whatevertheweatheroutside，lifeissowarmandcleanandcomfortable。
　　"That’scapital！"saidVonTaunitz，afatmanwithanincrediblythickneckandwithwhiskers，asheshooktheexaminingmagistrate’shand。"That’scapital！Youareverywelcome，delightedtomakeyouracquaintance。Wearecolleaguestosomeextent，youknow。AtonetimeIwasdeputyprosecutor；butnotforlong，onlytwoyears。Icameheretolookaftertheestate，andhereIhavegrownold——anoldfogey，infact。Youareverywelcome，"hewenton，evidentlyrestraininghisvoicesoasnottospeaktooloud；hewasgoingupstairswithhisguests。"Ihavenowife，she’sdead。Buthere，Iwillintroducemydaughters，"
　　andturninground，heshouteddownthestairsinavoiceofthunder："TellIgnattohavethesledgereadyateighto’clockto-morrowmorning。"
　　Hisfourdaughters，youngandprettygirls，allwearinggraydressesandwiththeirhairdoneupinthesamestyle，andtheircousin，alsoyoungandattractive，withherchildren，wereinthedrawingroom。Startchenko，whoknewthemalready，beganatoncebeggingthemtosingsomething，andtwooftheyoungladiesspentalongtimedeclaringtheycouldnotsingandthattheyhadnomusic；thenthecousinsatdowntothepiano，andwithtremblingvoices，theysangaduetfrom"TheQueenofSpades。"Again"UnPetitVerredeClicquot"wasplayed，andthechildrenskippedabout，beatingtimewiththeirfeet。AndStartchenkoprancedabouttoo。Everybodylaughed。
　　Thenthechildrensaidgood-nightandwentofftobed。Theexaminingmagistratelaughed，dancedaquadrille，flirted，andkeptwonderingwhetheritwasnotalladream？ThekitchenoftheZemstvohut，theheapofhayinthecorner，therustleofthebeetles，therevoltingpoverty-strickensurroundings，thevoicesofthewitnesses，thewind，thesnowstorm，thedangerofbeinglost；andthenallatoncethissplendid，brightlylightedroom，thesoundsofthepiano，thelovelygirls，thecurly-headedchildren，thegay，happylaughter——suchatransformationseemedtohimlikeafairytale，anditseemedincrediblethatsuchtransitionswerepossibleatthedistanceofsometwomilesinthecourseofonehour。Anddrearythoughtspreventedhimfromenjoyinghimself，andhekeptthinkingthiswasnotlifehere，butbitsoflifefragments，thateverythingherewasaccidental，thatonecoulddrawnoconclusionsfromit；andheevenfeltsorryforthesegirls，whowerelivingandwouldendtheirlivesinthewilds，inaprovincefarawayfromthecenterofculture，wherenothingisaccidental，buteverythingisinaccordancewithreasonandlaw，andwhere，forinstance，everysuicideisintelligible，sothatonecanexplainwhyithashappenedandwhatisitssignificanceinthegeneralschemeofthings。Heimaginedthatifthelifesurroundinghimhereinthewildswerenotintelligibletohim，andifhedidnotseeit，itmeantthatitdidnotexistatall。
　　AtsuppertheconversationturnedonLesnitsky"Heleftawifeandchild，"saidStartchenko。"Iwouldforbidneurasthenicsandallpeoplewhosenervoussystemisoutofordertomarry，Iwoulddeprivethemoftherightandpossibilityofmultiplyingtheirkind。Tobringintotheworldnervous，invalidchildrenisacrime。"
　　"Hewasanunfortunateyoungman，"saidVonTaunitz，sighinggentlyandshakinghishead。"Whatalotonemustsufferandthinkaboutbeforeonebringsoneselftotakeone’sownlife，……ayounglife！Suchamisfortunemayhappeninanyfamily，andthatisawful。Itishardtobearsuchathing，insufferable……"
　　Andallthegirlslistenedinsilencewithgravefaces，lookingattheirfather。Lyzhinfeltthathe，too，mustsaysomething，buthecouldn’tthinkofanything，andmerelysaid：
　　"Yes，suicideisanundesirablephenomenon。"
　　Hesleptinawarmroom，inasoftbedcoveredwithaquiltunderwhichtherewerefinecleansheets，butforsomereasondidnotfeelcomfortable：perhapsbecausethedoctorandVonTaunitzwere，foralongtime，talkingintheadjoiningroom，andoverheadheheard，throughtheceilingandinthestove，thewindroaringjustasintheZemstvohut，andasplaintivelyhowling："Oo-oo-oo-oo！"
　　VonTaunitz’swifehaddiedtwoyearsbefore，andhewasstillunabletoresignhimselftohislossand，whateverhewastalkingabout，alwaysmentionedhiswife；andtherewasnotraceofaprosecutorleftabouthimnow。
　　"IsitpossiblethatImaysomedaycometosuchacondition？"
　　thoughtLyzhin，ashefellasleep，stillhearingthroughthewallhishost’ssubdued，asitwerebereaved，voice。
　　Theexaminingmagistratedidnotsleepsoundly。Hefelthotanduncomfortable，anditseemedtohiminhissleepthathewasnotatVonTaunitz’s，andnotinasoftcleanbed，butstillinthehayattheZemstvohut，hearingthesubduedvoicesofthewitnesses；hefanciedthatLesnitskywascloseby，notfifteenpacesaway。Inhisdreamsherememberedhowtheinsuranceagent，black-hairedandpale，wearingdustyhighboots，hadcomeintothebookkeeper’soffice。"Thisisourinsuranceagent……"
　　ThenhedreamedthatLesnitskyandLoshadintheconstablewerewalkingthroughtheopencountryinthesnow，sidebyside，supportingeachother；thesnowwaswhirlingabouttheirheads，thewindwasblowingontheirbacks，buttheywalkedon，singing：Wegoon，andon，andon……"
　　Theoldmanwaslikeamagicianinanopera，andbothofthemweresingingasthoughtheywereonthestage：
　　"Wegoon，andon，andon！……Youareinthewarmth，inthelightandsnugness，butwearewalkinginthefrostandthestorm，throughthedeepsnow……Weknownothingofease，weknownothingofjoy……Webearalltheburdenofthislife，yoursandours……Oo-oo-oo！Wegoon，andon，andon……"
　　Lyzhinwokeandsatupinbed。Whataconfused，baddream！Andwhydidhedreamoftheconstableandtheagenttogether？Whatnonsense！AndnowwhileLyzhin’sheartwasthrobbingviolentlyandhewassittingonhisbed，holdinghisheadinhishands，itseemedtohimthattherereallywassomethingincommonbetweenthelivesoftheinsuranceagentandtheconstable。Don’ttheyreallygosidebysideholdingeachotherup？Sometieunseen，butsignificantandessential，existedbetweenthem，andevenbetweenthemandVonTaunitzandbetweenallmen——allmen；inthislife，evenintheremotestdesert，nothingisaccidental，everythingisfullofonecommonidea，everythinghasonesoul，oneaim，andtounderstandititisnotenoughtothink，itisnotenoughtoreason，onemusthavealso，itseems，thegiftofinsightintolife，agiftwhichisevidentlynotbestowedonall。
　　Andtheunhappymanwhohadbrokendown，whohadkilledhimself——the"neurasthenic，"asthedoctorcalledhim——andtheoldpeasantwhospenteverydayofhislifegoingfromonemantoanother，wereonlyaccidental，wereonlyfragmentsoflifeforonewhothoughtofhisownlifeasaccidental，butwerepartsofoneorganism——marvelousandrational——foronewhothoughtofhisownlifeaspartofthatuniversalwholeandunderstoodit。
　　SothoughtLyzhin，anditwasathoughtthathadlonglainhiddeninhissoul，andonlynowitwasunfoldedbroadlyandclearlytohisconsciousness。
　　Helaydownandbegantodropasleep；andagaintheyweregoingalongtogether，singing："Wegoon，andon，andon……Wetakefromlifewhatishardestandbitterestinit，andweleaveyouwhatiseasyandjoyful；andsittingatsupper，youcancoldlyandsensiblydiscusswhywesufferandperish，andwhywearenotassoundandassatisfiedasyou。"
　　Whattheyweresinginghadoccurredtohismindbefore，butthethoughtwassomewhereinthebackgroundbehindhisotherthoughts，andflickeredtimidlylikeafarawaylightinfoggyweather。Andhefeltthatthissuicideandthepeasant’ssufferingslayuponhisconscience，too；toresignhimselftothefactthatthesepeople，submissivetotheirfate，shouldtakeuptheburdenofwhatwashardestandgloomiestinlife——howawfulitwas！Toacceptthis，andtodesireforhimselfalifefulloflightandmovementamonghappyandcontentedpeople，andtobecontinuallydreamingofsuch，meansdreamingoffreshsuicidesofmencrushedbytoilandanxiety，orofmenweakandoutcastwhompeopleonlytalkofsometimesatsupperwithannoyanceormockery，withoutgoingtotheirhelp……Andagain：
　　"Wegoon，andon，andon……"asthoughsomeonewerebeatingwithahammeronhistemples。
　　Hewokeearlyinthemorningwithaheadache，rousedbyanoise；
　　inthenextroomVonTaunitzwassayingloudlytothedoctor：
　　"It’simpossibleforyoutogonow。Lookwhat’sgoingonoutside。
　　Don’targue，youhadbetteraskthecoachman；hewon’ttakeyouinsuchweatherforamillion。"
　　"Butit’sonlytwomiles，"saidthedoctorinanimploringvoice。
　　"Well，ifitwereonlyhalfamile。Ifyoucan’t，thenyoucan’t。
　　Directlyyoudriveoutofthegatesitisperfecthell，youwouldbeofftheroadinaminute。Nothingwillinducemetoletyougo，youcansaywhatyoulike。"
　　"It’sboundtobequietertowardsevening，"saidthepeasantwhowasheatingthestove。
　　AndinthenextroomthedoctorbegantalkingoftherigorousclimateanditsinfluenceonthecharacteroftheRussian，ofthelongwinterswhich，bypreventingmovementfromplacetoplace，hindertheintellectualdevelopmentofthepeople；andLyzhinlistenedwithvexationtotheseobservationsandlookedoutofwindowatthesnowdriftswhichwerepiledonthefence。Hegazedatthewhitedustwhichcoveredthewholevisibleexpanse，atthetreeswhichbowedtheirheadsdespairinglytorightandthentoleft，listenedtothehowlingandthebanging，andthoughtgloomily：
　　"Well，whatmoralcanbedrawnfromit？It’sablizzardandthatisallaboutit……"
　　Atmiddaytheyhadlunch，thenwanderedaimlesslyaboutthehouse；theywenttothewindows。
　　"AndLesnitskyislyingthere，"thoughtLyzhin，watchingthewhirlingsnow，whichracedfuriouslyroundandrounduponthedrifts。"Lesnitskyislyingthere，thewitnessesarewaiting……"
　　Theytalkedoftheweather，sayingthatthesnowstormusuallylastedtwodaysandnights，rarelylonger。Atsixo’clocktheyhaddinner，thentheyplayedcards，sang，danced；atlasttheyhadsupper。Thedaywasover，theywenttobed。
　　Inthenight，towardsmorning，itallsubsided。Whentheygotupandlookedoutofwindow，thebarewillowswiththeirweaklydroopingbrancheswerestandingperfectlymotionless；itwasdullandstill，asthoughnaturenowwereashamedofitsorgy，ofitsmadnights，andthelicenseithadgiventoitspassions。Thehorses，harnessedtandem，hadbeenwaitingatthefrontdoorsincefiveo’clockinthemorning。Whenitwasfullydaylightthedoctorandtheexaminingmagistrateputontheirfurcoatsandfeltboots，and，sayinggood-bytotheirhost，wentout。
　　Atthestepsbesidethecoachmanstoodthefamiliarfigureoftheconstable，IlyaLoshadin，withanoldleatherbagacrosshisshoulderandnocaponhishead，coveredwithsnowallover，andhisfacewasredandwetwithperspiration。Thefootmanwhohadcomeouttohelpthegentlemenandcovertheirlegslookedathimsternlyandsaid：
　　"Whatareyoustandingherefor，youolddevil？Getaway！"
　　"Yourhonor，thepeopleareanxious，"saidLoshadin，smilingnaivelyalloverhisface，andevidentlypleasedatseeingatlastthepeoplehehadwaitedforsolong。"Thepeopleareveryuneasy，thechildrenarecrying……Theythought，yourhonor，thatyouhadgonebacktothetownagain。Showustheheavenlymercy，ourbenefactors！……"
　　Thedoctorandtheexaminingmagistratesaidnothing，gotintothesledge，anddrovetoSyrnya。