CHAPTERXLIIICYNTHIA’SCONFESSION
’YousaidImightcome,’saidMolly,’andthatyouwouldtellmeall。’
’Youknowall,Ithink,’saidCynthiaheavily。’Perhapsyoudon’tknowwhatexcusesIhave,butatanyrateyouknowwhatascrapeIamin。’
’I’vebeenthinkingagreatdeal,’saidMollytimidlyanddoubtfully。
’AndIcan’thelpfancyingifyoutoldpapa——’
Beforeshecouldgoon,Cynthiahadstoodup。
’No!’saidshe。’ThatIwon’t。UnlessI’mtoleavehereatonce。AndyouknowIhavenotanotherplacetogoto—withoutwarningImean。I
daresaymyunclewouldtakemein,he’sarelation,andwouldbeboundtostandbymeinwhateverdisgraceImightbe;orperhapsImightgetagoverness’ssituation;aprettygovernessIshouldbe!’
’Fray,please,Cynthia,don’tgooffintosuchwildtalking。Idon’tbelieveyou’vedonesoverywrong。Yousayyouhavenot,andIbelieveyou。Thathorridmanhasmanagedtogetyouinvolvedinsomeway;butI’msurepapacouldsetittorights,ifyouwouldonlymakeafriendofhimandtellhimall——’
’No,Molly,’saidCynthia,’Ican’t,andthere’sanendofit。Youmayifyoulike,onlyletmeleavethehousefirst;givemethatmuchtime。’
’YouknowIwouldnevertellanythingyouwishedmenottotell,Cynthia,’
saidMolly,deeplyhurt。
’Wouldyounot,darling?’saidCynthia,takingherhand。’Willyoupromisemethat?quiteasacredpromise?—foritwouldbesuchacomforttometotellyouall,nowyouknowsomuch。’
’Yes!I’llpromisenottotell。Youshouldnothavedoubtedme,’saidMolly,stillalittlesorrowfully。
’Verywell。Itrusttoyou。IknowImay。’
’Butdothinkoftellingpapa,andgettinghimtohelpyou,’perseveredMolly。
’Never,’saidCynthiaresolutely,butmorequietlythanbefore。’DoyouthinkIforgetwhathesaidatthetimeofthatwretchedMrCoxe;howseverehewas,andhowlongIwasindisgrace,ifindeedI’moutofitnow?Iamoneofthosepeople,asmammasayssometimes—Icannotlivewithpersonswhodon’tthinkwellofme。Itmaybeaweakness,orasin,IamsureIdon’tknowandIdon’tcare;butIreallycannotbehappyinthesamehousewithanyonewhoknowsmyfaults,andthinksthattheyaregreaterthanmymerits。Nowyouknowyourfatherwoulddothat。Ihaveoftentoldyouthathe(andyoutoo,Molly,)hadahigherstandardthanIhadeverknown。Oh,Icouldnotbearit—ifheweretoknowhewouldbesoangrywithme—hewouldnevergetoverit,andIhavesolikedhim!
Idosolikehim。’
’Well,nevermind,dear;heshallnotknow,’saidMolly,forCynthiawasagainbecominghysterical,—’atleastwe’llsaynomoreaboutitnow。’
’Andyou’llneversayanymore—never—promiseme,’saidCynthia,takingherhandeagerly。
’Nevertillyougivemeleave。NowdoletmeseeifIcannothelpyou。
Liedownonthebed,andIwillsitbyyou,andletustalkitover。’
ButCypthiasatedownagaininthechairbythedressing—table。
’Whendiditallbegin?’saidMolly,afteralongpauseofsilence。
’Longago—fourorfiveyears。Iwassuchachildtobeleftalltomyself。Itwastheholidays,andmammawasawayvisiting,andtheDonaldsonsaskedmetogowiththemtotheWorcesterFestival。Youcan’tfancyhowpleasantitallsounded,especiallytome。IhadbeenshutupinthatgreatdrearyhouseatAshcombe,wheremammahadherschool;itbelongedtoLordCumnor,andMrPrestonashisagenthadtoseeitallpaintedandpapered;
butbesidesthathewasveryintimatewithus:Ibelievemammathought—no,I’mnotsureaboutthat,andIhaveenoughblametolayatherdoor,topreventmytellingyouanythingthatmaybeonlyfancy——’
Thenshepaused,andsatestillforaminuteortwo,recallingthepast。
Mollywasstruckbytheagedandcarewornexpressionwhichhadtakentemporaryholdofthebrilliantandbeautifulface;shecouldseefromthathowmuchCynthiamusthavesufferedfromthishiddentroubleofhers。
’Well!atany,ratewewereintimatewithhim,andhecameagreatdealaboutthehouse,andknewasmuchasanyoneofmamma’saffairs,andalltheinsandoutsofherlife。I’mtellingyouthatinorderthatyoumayunderstandhownaturalitwasformetoanswerhisquestionswhenhecameonedayandfoundme,notcrying,foryouknowI’mnotmuchgiventothat,inspiteofto—day’sexposureofmyself;butfrettingandfumingbecause,thoughmammahadwrittenwordImightgowiththeDonaldsons,shehadneversaidhowIwastogetanymoneyforthejourney,muchlessforanythingofdress,andIhadoutgrownallmylastyear’sfrocks,andasforglovesandboots—inshort,Ireallyhadhardlyclothesdecentenoughforchurch——’
’Whydidnotyouwritetoherandtellherallthis?’saidMolly,halfafraidofappearingtocastblamebyherverynaturalquestion。
’IwishIhadherlettertoshowyou;youmusthaveseensomeofmamma’sletters,though;don’tyouknowhowshealwaysseemstoleaveoutjusttheimportantpointofeveryfact?Inthiscaseshedescantedlargelyontheenjoymentshewashaving,andthekindnessshewasreceiving,andherwishthatIcouldhavebeenwithher,andhergladnessthatItoowasgoingtohavesomepleasure,buttheonlythingthatwouldhavebeenofrealusetomesheleftout,andthatwaswhereshewasgoingtonext。Shementionedthatshewasleavingthehouseshewasstoppingatthedayaftershewrote,andthatsheshouldbeathomebyacertaindate;butIgottheletteronaSaturday,andthefestivalbeganonthenextTuesday——’
’PoorCynthia!’saidMolly。’Still,ifyouhadwritten,yourlettermighthavebeenforwarded。Idon’tmeantobehard,onlyIdosodislikethethoughtofyoureverhavingmadeafriendofthatman。’
’Ah!’saidCynthia,sighing。’Howeasyitistojudgerightlyafteroneseeswhatevilcomesfromjudgingwrongly:Iwasonlyayounggirl,hardlymorethanachild,andhewasafriendtousthen;exceptingmamma,theonlyfriendIknew;theDonaldsonswereonlykindandgood—naturedacquaintances。’
’Iamsorry,’saidMollyhumbly,’Ihavebeensohappywithpapa。I
hardlycanunderstandhowdifferentitmusthavebeenwithyou。’
’Different!Ishouldthinkso。Theworryaboutmoneymademesickofmylife。Wemightnotsaywewerepoor,itwouldhaveinjuredtheschool,butIwouldhavestintedandstarvedifmammaandIhadgotonashappilytogetheraswemighthavedone—asyouandMrGibsondo。Itwasnotthepoverty;itwasthatsheneverseemedtocaretohavemewithher。Assoonastheholidayscameround,shewasofftosomegreathouseoranother,andIdaresayIwasataveryawkwardagetohavemeloungingaboutinherdrawing—roomwhencallerscame。GirlsattheageIwasthenaresoterriblykeenatscentingoutmotives,andputtingintheirawkwardquestionsastothelittletwistingsandtwirlingsandvanishingsofconversation;
they’venodistinctnotionofwhatarethetruthsandfalsehoodsofpolitelife。AtanyrateIwasverymuchinmamma’sway,andIfeltit。MrPrestonseemedtofeelittooforme;andIwasverygratefultohimforkindwordsandsympatheticlooks—crumbsofkindnesswhichwouldhavedroppedunderyourtableunnoticed。Sothisday,whenhecametoseehowtheworkmenweregettingon,hefoundmeinthedesertedschoolroom,lookingatmyfadedsummerbonnetandsomeoldribbonsIhadbeenspongingout,andhalf—worn—outgloves—asortofrag—fairspreadoutonthedealtable。Iwasinaregularpassionwithonlylookingatthatshabbiness。HesaidhewassogladtohearIwasgoingtothisfestivalwiththeDonaldsons;oldBetty,ourservant,hadtoldhimthenews,Ibelieve。ButIwassoperplexedaboutmoney,andmyvanitywassoputoutaboutmyshabbydress,thatIwasinapet,andsaidIshouldnotgo。Hesatedownonthetable,andlittlebylittlehemademetellhimallmytroubles。Idosometimesthinkhewasveryniceinthosedays。SomehowIneverfeltasifitwaswrongorfoolishoranythingtoaccepthisofferofmoneyatthetime。Hehadtwentypoundsinhispocket,hesaid,andreallydidnotknowwhat。todowithit,shouldnotwantitformonths;Icouldrepayit,orrathermammacould,whenitsuitedher。
ShemusthaveknownIshouldwantmoney,andmostlikelythoughtIshouldapplytohim。Twentypoundswouldnotbetoomuch,Imusttakeitall,andsoon。Iknew,atleastIthoughtIknew,thatIshouldneverspendtwentypounds;butIthoughtIcouldgivehimbackwhatIdidnotwant,andso—well,thatwasthebeginning!Itdoesnotsoundsoverywrong,doesit,Molly?’
’No,’saidMolly,hesitatingly。Shedidnotwishtomakeherselfintoahardjudge,andyetshedidsodislikeMrPreston。Cynthiawenton,—
’Well,whatwithbootsandgloves,andabonnetandamantle,andawhitemuslingown,whichwasmadeformebeforeIleftontheTuesday,andasilkgownthatfollowedtotheDonaldsons’,andmyjourneys,andall,therewasverylittleleftofthetwentypounds,especiallywhenI
foundImustgetaball—dressinWorcester,forwewerealltogototheBall。MrsDonaldsongavememyticket,butsheratherlookedgraveatmyideaofgoingtotheBallinmywhitemuslin,whichIhadalreadyworntwoeveningsattheirhouse。Ohdear!howpleasantitmustbetoberich!
Youknow,’continuedCynthia,smilingaverylittle,’Ican’thelpbeingawarethatIampretty,andthatpeopleadmiremeverymuch。IfounditoutfirstattheDonaldsons’。IbegantothinkIdidlookprettyinmyfinenewclothes,andIsawthatotherpeoplethoughtsotoo。Iwascertainlythebelleofthehouse,anditwasverypleasanttofeelmypower。ThelastdayortwoofthatgayweekMrPrestonjoinedourparty。ThelasttimehehadseenmewaswhenIwasdressedinshabbyclothestoosmallforme,half—cryinginmysolitude,neglectedandpenniless。AttheDonaldsons’
Iwasalittlequeen;andasIsaid,finefeathersmakefinebirds,allthepeopleweremakingmuchofme;andatthatball,whichwasthefirstnighthecame,IhadmorepartnersthanIknewwhattodowith。Isupposehereallydidfallinlovewithmethen。Idon’tthinkhehaddonesobefore。
AndthenIbegantofeelhowawkwarditwastobeinhisdebt。IcouldnotgivemyselfairstohimasIdidtoothers。Oh!itwassoawkwardanduncomfortable!ButIlikedhim,andfelthimasafriendallthetime。
ThelastdayIwaswalkinginthegardenalongwiththeothers,andIthoughtIwouldtellhimhowmuchIhadenjoyedmyself,andhowhappyIhadbeen,allthankstohistwentypounds(IwasbeginningtofeellikeCinderellawhentheclockwasstrikingtwelve),andtotellhimitshouldberepaidtohimassoonaspossible,thoughIturnedsickatthethoughtoftellingmamma,andknewenoughofouraffairstounderstandhowverydifficultitwouldbetomusterupthemoney。Theendofourtalkcameverysoon,foralmosttomyterrorhebegantotalkviolentlovetome,andtobegmetopromisetomarryhim。Iwassofrightened,thatIranawaytotheothers。ButthatnightIgotaletterfromhim,apologizingforstartlingme,renewinghisoffer,hisentreatiesforapromiseofmarriage,tobefulfilledatanydateIwouldpleasetoname—infactamosturgentlove—letter,andinitareferencetomyunluckydebt,whichwastobeadebtnolonger,onlyanadvanceofthemoneytobehereaftermineifonly——Youcanfancyitall,Molly,betterthanIcanrememberittotellityou。’
’Andwhatdidyousay?’askedMolly,breathless。
’Ididnotansweritatalluntilanotherlettercame,entreatingforareply。Bythattimemammahadcomehome,andtheolddailypressureandplaintofpovertyhadcomeon。MaryDonaldsonwrotetomeoften,singingthepraisesofMrPrestonasenthusiasticallyasifshehadbeenbribedtodoit。Ihadseenhimaverypopularmanintheirset,andIlikedhimwellenough,andfeltgratefultohim。SoIwroteandgavehimmypromisetomarryhimwhenIwastwenty,butitwastobeasecrettillthen。AndItriedtoforgetIhadeverborrowedmoneyofhim,butsomehowassoonasIfeltpledgedtohimIbegantohatehim。Icouldnotendurehiseagernessofgreetingifeverhefoundmealone;andmammabegantosuspect,Ithink。
Icannottellyoualltheinsandouts,infactIdidnotunderstandthematthetime,andIdon’trememberclearlyhowitallhappenednow。ButIknowthatLadyCuxhavensentmammasomemoneytobeappliedtomyeducationasshecalledit,andmammaseemedverymuchputoutandinverylowspirits,andsheandIdidnotgetonatalltogether。SoofcourseIneverventuredtonamethehatefultwentypoundstoher,butwentontryingtothinkthatifIwastomarryMrPreston,itneedneverbepaid—verymeanandwickedIdaresay,butoh,Molly,I’vebeenpunishedforit,forhowIabhorthatman。’
’Butwhy?Whendidyoubegintodislikehim?Youseemtohavetakenitverypassivelyallthistime。’
’Idon’tknow。ItwasgrowinguponmebeforeIwenttothatschoolatBoulogne。HemademefeelasifIwasinhispower;andbytoooftenremindingmeofmyengagementtohim,hemademecriticalofhiswordsandways。
Therewasaninsolenceinhismannertomamma,too。Ah!you’rethinkingthatI’mnottoorespectfuladaughter—andperhapsnot;butIcouldnotbearhiscovertsneersatherfaults,andIhatedhiswayofshowingwhathecalledhis"love"forme。Then,afterIhadbeenasemestreatMadameLefevre’s,anewEnglishgirlcame—acousinofhis,whoknewbutlittleofme。Now,Molly,youmustforgetassoonasIhavetoldyouwhatIamgoingtosay—andsheusedtotalkmuchandperpetuallyabouthercousinRobert—hewasthegreatmanofthefamily,evidently—andhowhewassohandsome,andeveryladyofthelandinlovewithhim,—aladyoftitleintothebargain。’
’LadyHarriet!Idaresay,’saidMolly,indignantly。
’Idon’tknow,’saidCynthia,wearily。’Ididn’tcareatthetime,andIdon’tcarenow;forshewentontosaytherewasaveryprettywidowtoo,whomadedesperatelovetohim。Hehadoftenlaughedwiththematallherlittleadvances,whichshethoughthedidnotseethrough,—and—oh,—andthiswasthemanIhadpromisedtomarry,andgoneintodebtto,andwrittenlove—lettersto。Sonowyouunderstanditall,Molly。’
’No,Idon’tyet。Whatdidyoudoonhearinghowhehadspokenaboutyourmother?’
’Therewasbutonethingtodo。IwroteandtoldhimIhatedhim,andwouldnever,nevermarryhim,andwouldpayhimbackhismoneyandtheinterestofitassoonaseverIcould。’
’Well?’
’AndMadameLefevrebroughtmebackmyletter,—unopened,Iwillsay;
andtoldmethatshedidnotallowletterstogentlementobesentbythepupilsofherestablishmentunlessshehadpreviouslyseentheircontents。
Itoldherhewasafamilyfriend,theagentwhomanagedmamma’saffairs—Ireallycouldnotstickatthetruth;butshewouldnotletitgo;andIbadtoseeherburnit,andtogivehermypromiseIwouldnotwriteagainbeforeshewouldconsentnottotellmamma。SoIhadtocalmdown,andwaittillIcamehome。’
’Butyoudidnotseehimthen;atleast,notforsometime。’
’No,butIcouldwrite;andIbegantotryandsaveupmymoneytopayhim。’
’Whatdidhesaytoyourletter?’
’Oh,atfirsthepretendednottobelieveIcouldbeinearnest;hethoughtitwasonlypique,oratemporaryoffencetobeapologizedforandcoveredoverwithpassionateprotestations。’
’Andafterwards?’
’Hecondescendedtothreats;and,whatisworse,thenIturnedcoward。
Icouldnotbeartohaveitallknownandtalkedabout,andmysillylettersshown—oh,suchletters—Icannotbeartothinkofthem,beginning,"MydearestRobert,"tothatman——’
’But,oh,Cynthia,howcouldyougoandengageyourselftoRoger?’askedMolly。
’Whynot?’saidCynthia,sharplyturningrounduponher。’Iwasfree—Iamfree;itseemedawayofassuringmyselfthatIwasquitefree;
andIdidlikeRoger—itwassuchacomforttobebroughtintocontactwithpeoplewhocouldbereliedupon;andIwasnotastockorastonethatIcouldfailtobetouchedwithhistender,unselfishlove,sodifferenttoMrPreston’s。Iknowyoudon’tthinkmegoodenoughforhim;and,ofcourse,ifallthiscomesout,hewon’tthinkmegoodenougheither’(fallingintoaplaintivetoneverytouchingtohear);’andsometimesIthinkI
willgivehimup,andgoofftosomefreshlifeamongststrangers;andonceortwiceIhavethoughtIwouldmarryMrPrestonoutofpurerevenge,andhavehimforeverinmypower—onlyIthinkIshouldhavetheworstofit。forheiscruelinhisverysoul—tigerish,withhisbeautifulstripedskinandrelentlessheart。Ihavesobeggedandbeggedhimtoletmegowithoutexposure。’
’Nevermindtheexposure,’saidMolly。’Itwillrecoilfarmoreonhimthanharmyou。’
Cynthiawentalittlepaler。’ButIsaidthingsinthoselettersaboutmamma。Iwasquick—eyedenoughtoallherfaults,andhardlyunderstoodtheforceofhertemptations;andhesayshewillshowthoseletterstoyourfather,unlessIconsenttoacknowledgeourengagement。’
’Heshallnot!’saidMolly,risingupinherindignation,andstandingbeforeCynthiaalmostasresolutelyfierceasifshewereintheverypresenceofMrPrestonhimself。’Iamnotafraidofhim。Hedarenotinsultme,orifhedoes,Idonotcare。Iwillaskhimforthoseletters,andseeifhewilldaretorefuseme。’
’Youdon’tknowhim,’saidCynthia,shakingherhead。’Hehasmademanyanappointmentwithme,justasifhewouldtakebackthemoney—whichhasbeensealedupreadyforhimthisfourmonths;orasifhewouldgivemebackmyletters。Poor,poorRoger!Howlittlehethinksofallthis。
WhenIwanttowritewordsoflovetohimIpullmyselfup,forIhavewrittenwordsasaffectionatetothatotherman。AndifMrPrestoneverguessedthatRogerandIwereengagedhewouldmanagetoberevengedonbothhimandmebygivingusasmuchpainashecouldwiththoseunluckyletters—writtenwhenIwasnotsixteen,Molly,—onlysevenofthem!
Theyarelikeamineundermyfeet,whichmayblowupanyday;anddownwillcomefatherandmotherandall。’Sheendedbitterlyenough,thoughherwordsweresolight。
’HowcanIgetthem?’saidMolly,thinking,—’forgetthemIwill。
Withpapatobackme,hedarenotrefuse。’
’Ah!Butthat’sjustthething。HeknowsI’mafraidofyourfather’shearingofitall,morethanofanyoneelse。’
’Andyethethinkshelovesyou!’
’Itishiswayofloving。Hesaysoftenenoughhedoesnotcarewhathedoessothathegetsmetobehiswife;andthatafterthatheissurehecanmakemelovehim。’Cynthiabegantocry,outofwearinessofbodyanddespairofmind。Molly’sarmswereroundherinaminute,andshepressedthebeautifulheadtoherbosom,andlaidherowncheekuponit,andhushedherupwithlullingwords,justasifCynthiawerealittlechild。
’Oh,itissuchacomforttohavetoldyouall!’murmuredshe。AndMollymadereply,—’Iamsurewehaverightonourside;andthatmakesmecertainhemustandshallgiveuptheletters。’
’Andtakethemoney?’addedCynthia,liftingherhead,andlookingeagerlyintoMolly’sface。’Hemusttakethemoney。Oh,Molly,youcannevermanageitallwithoutitscomingouttoyourfather!AndIwouldfarrathergoouttoRussiaasagoverness。IalmostthinkIwouldrather—no,notthat,’
saidshe,shudderingawayfromwhatshewasgoingtosay。’Buthemustnotknow—please,Molly,hemustnotknow。Icouldnotbearit。Idon’tknowwhatImightnotdo。You’llpromisemenevertotellhim,ormamma?’
’Ineverwill。YoudonotthinkIwouldforanythingshortofsaving——’Shewasgoingtohavesaid,’savingyouandRogerfrompain。’ButCynthiabrokein,—
’Fornothing。Noreasonwhatevermustmakeyoutellyourfather。Ifyoufail,youfail,andIwillloveyouforeverfortrying;butIshallbenoworsethanbefore。Better,indeed;forIshallhavethecomfortofyoursympathy。ButpromisemenottotellMrGibson。’
’Ihavepromisedonce,’saidMolly,’butIpromiseagain;sonowdogotobed,andtryandrest。Youarelookingaswhiteasasheet;you’llbeillifyoudon’tgetsomerest;andit’spasttwoo’clock,andyou’reshiveringwithcold。’
Sotheywishedeachothergood—night。ButwhenMollygotintoherroomallherspiritlefther;andshethrewherselfdownonherbed,dressedasshewas,forshehadnoheartleftforanything。IfRogereverheardofitallbyanychance,shefelthowitwoulddisturbhisloveforCynthia。
Andyetwasitrighttoconcealitfromhim?ShemusttryandpersuadeCynthiatotellitallstraightouttohimassoonashereturnedtoEngland。
Afullconfessiononherpartwouldwonderfullylessenanypainhemighthaveonfirsthearingofit。ShelostherselfinthoughtsofRoger—howhewouldfeel,whathewouldsay,howthatmeetingwouldcometopass,wherehewasatthatverytime,andsoon,tillshesuddenlypluckedherselfup,andrecollectedwhatsheherselfhadofferedandpromisedtodo。Nowthatthefirstfervourwasover,shesawthedifficultiesclearly;andtheforemostofallwashowshewastomanagetohaveatê;te—?tê;tewithMrPreston?HowhadCynthiamanaged?andthelettersthathadpassedbetweenthemtoo?Unwillingly,MollywascompelledtoperceivethattheremusthavebeenagreatdealofunderhandworkgoingoningbeneathCynthia’sapparentIopennessofbehaviour;andstillmoreunwillinglyshebegantobeafraidthatsheherselfwouldbeledintothepractice。Butshewouldtryandwalkinastraightpath;andifshedidwanderoutofit,itshouldonlybetosavepaintothosewhomsheloved。
chapter44
CHAPTERXLIVMOLLYGIBSONTOTHERESCUE
Itseemedcuriousenough,afterthestormsofthenight,tomeetinsmoothtranquillityatbreakfast。Cynthiawaspale;butshetalkedasquietlyasusualaboutallmannerofindifferentthings,whileMollysatesilent,watchingandwondering,andbecomingconvincedthatCynthiamusthavegonethroughalongexperienceofconcealingherrealthoughtsandsecrettroublesbeforeshecouldhavebeenabletoputonsuchasemblanceofcomposure。
AmongthelettersthatcameinthatmorningwasonefromtheLondonKirkpatricks;
butnotfromHelen,Cynthia’sownparticularcorrespondent。HersisterwrotetoapologizeforHelen,whowasnotwell,shesaid:hadhadtheinfluenza,whichhadleftherveryweakandpoorly。
’Lethercomedownhereforchangeofair,’saidMrGibson。’ThecountryatthistimeoftheyearisbetterthanLondon,exceptingwhentheplaceissurroundedbytrees。Nowourhouseiswelldrained,highup,gravelsoil,andI’llundertaketodoctorherfornothing。’
’Itwouldbecharming,’saidMrsGibson,rapidlyrevolvinginhermindthechangesnecessaryinherhouseholdeconomybeforereceivingayoungladyaccustomedtosuchahouseholdasMrKirkpatrick’s,andcalculatingtheconsequentinconveniencesinherownmind,weighingthemagainsttheprobableadvantagesevenwhileshespoke。
’Shouldnotyoulikeit,Cynthia?andMollytoo。Youtoo,dear,wouldbecomeacquaintedwithoneofthegirls,andIhavenodoubtyouwouldbeaskedbackagain,whichwouldbesoverynice!’
’AndIshouldnotlethergo,’saidMrGibson,whohadacquiredanunfortunatefacilityofreadinghiswife’sthoughts。
’DearHelen!’wentonMrsGibson,’Ishouldsoliketonurseher,wewouldmakeyourconsulting—roomintoherownprivatesitting—room,mydear。’
—(Itishardlynecessarytosaythatthescaleshadbeenweigheddownbytheinconveniencesofhavingapersonbehindthescenesforseveralweeks)。’Forwithaninvalidsomuchdependsontranquillity。Inthedrawing—room,forinstance,shemightconstantlybedisturbedbycallers;andthedining—roomisso—sowhatshallIcallit?sodinnery,—thesmellofmealsneverseemstoleaveit;itwouldhavebeendifferentifdearpapahadallowedmetothrowoutthatwindow——’
’Whycan’tshehavethedressing—roomforherbed—room,andthelittleroomopeningoutofthedrawing—roomforhersitting—room?’askedMrGibson。
’Thelibrary,’forbythisnameMrsGibsonchosetodignifywhathadformerlybeencalledthebook—closet,—’why,itwouldhardlyholdasofa,besidesthebooksandthewriting—table,andtherearedraughtseverywhere。
No,mydear,wehadbetternotaskheratall,herownhomeiscomfortableatanyrate!’