itbeinganunlawful，incestuousliving，addedtothataversion，
　　andthoughIhadnogreatconcernaboutitinpointof
　　conscience，yeteverythingaddedtomakecohabitingwithhim
　　themostnauseousthingtomeintheworld；andIthinkverily
　　itwascometosuchaheight，thatIcouldalmostaswillingly
　　haveembracedadogashavelethimofferanythingofthat
　　kindtome，forwhichreasonIcouldnotbearthethoughtsof
　　comingbetweenthesheetswithhim。
　　IcannotsaythatIwas
　　rightinpointofpolicyincarryingitsuchalength，whileatthe
　　sametimeIdidnotresolvetodiscoverthethingtohim；butI
　　amgivinganaccountofwhatwas，notofwhatoughtorought
　　nottobe。
　　Intheirdirectlyoppositeopiniontooneanothermymother
　　andIcontinuedalongtime，anditwasimpossibletoreconcile
　　ourjudgments；manydisputeswehadaboutit，butwecould
　　nevereitherofusyieldourown，orbringovertheother。
　　Iinsistedonmyaversiontolyingwithmyownbrother，and
　　sheinsisteduponitsbeingimpossibletobringhimtoconsent
　　tomygoingfromhimtoEngland；andinthisuncertaintywe
　　continued，notdifferingsoastoquarrel，oranythinglikeit，
　　butsoasnottobeabletoresolvewhatweshoulddotomake
　　upthatterriblebreachthatwasbeforeus。
　　AtlastIresolvedonadesperatecourse，andtoldmymother
　　myresolution，viz。that，inshort，Iwouldtellhimofitmyself。
　　Mymotherwasfrightedtothelastdegreeattheverythoughts
　　ofit；butIbidherbeeasy，toldherIwoulddoitgradually
　　andsoftly，andwithalltheartandgood-humourIwasmistress
　　of，andtimeitalsoaswellasIcould，takinghimingood-humour
　　too。
　　ItoldherIdidnotquestionbut，ifIcouldbehypocrite
　　enoughtofeignmoreaffectiontohimthanIreallyhad，Ishould
　　succeedinallmydesign，andwemightpartbyconsent，and
　　withagoodagreement，forImightlivehimwellenoughfor
　　abrother，thoughIcouldnotforahusband。
　　Allthiswhilehelayatmymothertofindout，ifpossible，what
　　wasthemeaningofthatdreadfulexpressionofmine，ashe
　　calledit，whichImentionedbefore:
　　namely，thatIwasnothis
　　lawfulwife，normychildrenhislegalchildren。
　　Mymotherput
　　himoff，toldhimshecouldbringmetonoexplanations，but
　　foundtherewassomethingthatdisturbedmeverymuch，and
　　shehopedsheshouldgetitoutofmeintime，andinthe
　　meantimerecommendedtohimearnestlytousememore
　　tenderly，andwinmewithhisusualgoodcarriage；toldhim
　　ofhis
　　terrifyingandaffrightingmewithhisthreatsofsending
　　metoamadhouse，andthelike，andadvisedhimnottomake
　　awomandesperateonanyaccountwhatever。
　　Hepromisedhertosoftenhisbehaviour，andbidherassure
　　methathelovedmeaswellasever，andthathehadsosuch
　　designasthatofsendingmetoamadhouse，whateverhemight
　　sayinhispassion；alsohedesiredmymothertousethesame
　　persuasionstometoo，thatouraffectionsmightberenewed，
　　andwemightlietogetherinagoodunderstandingasweused
　　todo。
　　Ifoundtheeffectsofthistreatypresently。
　　Myhusband’s
　　conductwasimmediatelyaltered，andhewasquiteanother
　　mantome；nothingcouldbekinderandmoreobligingthanhe
　　wastomeuponalloccasions；andIcoulddonolessthan
　　makesomereturntoit，whichIdidaswellasIcould，butit
　　wasbutinanawkwardmanneratbest，fornothingwasmore
　　frightfultomethanhiscaresses，andtheapprehensionsofbeing
　　withchildagainbyhimwasreadytothrowmeintofits；and
　　thismademeseethattherewasanabsolutenecessityofbreaking
　　thecasetohimwithoutanymoredelay，which，however，Idid
　　withallthecautionandreserveimaginable。
　　Hehadcontinuedhisalteredcarriagetomenearamonth，
　　andwebegantoliveanewkindoflifewithoneanother；and
　　couldIhavesatisfiedmyselftohavegoneonwithit，Ibelieve
　　itmighthavecontinuedaslongaswehadcontinuedalive
　　together。
　　Oneevening，asweweresittingandtalkingvery
　　friendlytogetherunderalittleawning，whichservedasan
　　arbourattheentrancefromourhouseintothegarden，hewas
　　inaverypleasant，agreeablehumour，andsaidabundanceof
　　kindthingstomerelatingtothepleasureofourpresentgood
　　agreement，andthedisordersofourpastbreach，andwhata
　　satisfactionitwastohimthatwehadroomtohopeweshould
　　neverhaveanymoreofit。
　　Ifetchedadeepsigh，andtoldhimtherewasnobodyinthe
　　worldcouldbemoredelightedthanIwasinthegoodagreement
　　wehadalwayskeptup，ormoreafflictedwiththebreachofit，
　　andshouldbesostill；butIwassorrytotellhimthattherewas
　　anunhappycircumstanceinourcase，whichlaytoocloseto
　　myheart，andwhichIknewnothowtobreaktohim，that
　　renderedmypartofitverymiserable，andtookfrommeallthe
　　comfortoftherest。
　　Heimportunedmetotellhimwhatitwas。
　　ItoldhimIcould
　　nottellhowtodoit；thatwhileitwasconcealedfromhim
　　Ialonewasunhappy，butifheknewitalso，weshouldbeboth
　　so；andthat，therefore，tokeephiminthedarkaboutitwas
　　thekindestthingthatIcoulddo，anditwasonthataccount
　　alonethatIkeptasecretfromhim，theverykeepingofwhich，
　　Ithought，wouldfirstorlastbemydestruction。
　　Itisimpossibletoexpresshissurpriseatthisrelation，andthe
　　doubleimportunitywhichheusedwithmetodiscoverittohim。
　　HetoldmeIcouldnotbecalledkindtohim，nay，Icouldnot
　　befaithfultohimifIconcealeditfromhim。
　　ItoldhimIthought
　　sotoo，andyetIcouldnotdoit。
　　HewentbacktowhatIhad
　　saidbeforetohim，andtoldmehehopeditdidnotrelateto
　　whatIhadsaidinmypassion，andthathehadresolvedto
　　forgetallthatastheeffectofarash，provokedspirit。
　　Itold
　　himIwishedIcouldforgetitalltoo，butthatitwasnottobe
　　done，theimpressionwastoodeep，andIcouldnotdoit:
　　it
　　wasimpossible。
　　Hethentoldmehewasresolvednottodifferwithmein
　　anything，andthatthereforehewouldimportunemenomore
　　aboutit，resolvingtoacquiesceinwhateverIdidorsaid；only
　　beggedIshouldthenagree，thatwhateveritwas，itshouldno
　　moreinterruptourquietandourmutualkindness。
　　Thiswasthemostprovokingthinghecouldhavesaidtome，
　　forIreallywantedhisfurtherimportunities，thatImightbe
　　prevailedwithtobringoutthatwhichindeeditwaslikedeath
　　tometoconceal；soIansweredhimplainlythatIcouldnot
　　sayIwasgladnottobeimportuned，thoughtIcouldnottell
　　howtocomply。
　　’Butcome，mydear，’saidI，’whatconditions
　　willyoumakewithmeupontheopeningthisaffairtoyou？’
　　’Anyconditionsintheworld，’saidhe，’thatyoucaninreason
　　desireofme。’
　　’Well，’saidI，’come，giveitmeunderyour
　　hand，thatifyoudonotfindIaminanyfault，orthatIam
　　willinglyconcernedinthecausesofthemisfortunethatisto
　　follow，youwillnotblameme，usemetheworse，domyany
　　injury，ormakemebethesuffererforthatwhichisnotmyfault。’
　　’That，’sayshe，’isthemostreasonabledemandintheworld:
　　nottoblameyouforthatwhichisnotyourfault。
　　Givemea
　　penandink，’sayshe；soIraninandfetchedapen，ink，and
　　paper，andhewrotetheconditiondownintheverywordsI
　　hadproposedit，andsigneditwithhisname。
　　“Well，’says
　　he，
　　’whatisnext，mydear？’
　　’Why，’saysI，’thenextis，thatyouwillnotblamemefornot
　　discoveringthesecretofittoyoubeforeIknewit。’
　　’Veryjustagain，’sayshe；’withallmyheart’；sohewrote
　　downthatalso，andsignedit。
　　’Well，mydear，’saysI，’thenIhavebutoneconditionmore
　　tomakewithyou，andthatis，thatasthereisnobodyconcerned
　　initbutyouandI，youshallnotdiscoverittoanypersonin
　　theworld，exceptyourownmother；andthatinallthemeasures
　　youshalltakeuponthediscovery，asIamequallyconcerned
　　initwithyou，thoughasinnocentasyourself，youshalldo
　　nothinginapassion，nothingtomyprejudiceortoyour
　　mother’sprejudice，withoutmyknowledgeandconsent。’
　　Thisalittleamazedhim，andhewrotedownthewordsdistinctly，
　　butreadthemoverandoverbeforehesignedthem，
　　hesitatingatthemseveraltimes，andrepeatingthem:
　　“My
　　mother’sprejudice！andyourprejudice！
　　Whatmysteriousthing
　　canthisbe？’
　　However，atlasthesignedit。
　　’Well，saysI，’mydear，I’llaskyounomoreunderyourhand；
　　butasyouaretohearthemostunexpectedandsurprisingthing
　　thatperhapseverbefellanyfamilyintheworld，Ibegyouto
　　promisemeyouwillreceiveitwithcomposureandapresence
　　ofmindsuitabletoamanofsense。’
　　’I’lldomyutmost，’sayshe，’uponconditionyouwillkeepme
　　nolongerinsuspense，foryouterrifymewithallthese
　　preliminaries。’
　　“Well，then，’saysI，’itisthis:
　　asItoldyoubeforeinaheat，
　　thatIwasnotyourlawfulwife，andthatourchildrenwerenot
　　legalchildren，soImustletyouknownowincalmnessandin
　　kindness，butwithafflictionenough，thatIamyourownsister，
　　andyoumyownbrother，andthatweareboththechildrenof
　　ourmothernowalive，andinthehouse，whoisconvincedof
　　thetruthofit，inamannernottobedeniedorcontradicted。’
　　Isawhimturnpaleandlookwild；andIsaid，’Nowremember
　　yourpromise，andreceiveitwithpresenceofmind；forwho
　　couldhavesaidmoretoprepareyouforitthanIhavedone？
　　However，Icalledaservant，andgothimalittleglassofrum
　　whichistheusualdramofthatcountry，forhewasjust
　　faintingaway。
　　Whenhewasalittlerecovered，Isaidtohim，
　　’Thisstory，youmaybesure，requiresalongexplanation，and
　　therefore，havepatienceandcomposeyourmindtohearitout，
　　andI’llmakeitasshortasIcan’；andwiththis，Itoldhim
　　whatIthoughtwasneedfulofthefact，andparticularlyhow
　　mymothercametodiscoverittome，asabove。
　　’Andnow，